Why Ballmer Should Leave Microsoft

An anonymous reader writes "In the wake of the announcement of Bill Gates' departure from the top spot at Microsoft, CNN Money is carrying an article arguing that Steve Ballmer should step down as well." From the article: "Since Gates stepped down as CEO in 2000 in favor of Ballmer, the company has floundered technically and strategically. As the company's chairman, chief software architect and supposed visionary, Gates deserves blame for missing the wave of Web-based software that has propelled Google and Yahoo. But Ballmer has made gaffes of his own in his longtime role as head of the company's business side. They include an undistinguished push into business applications to compete with Oracle, financial maneuvers that have failed to stir the stock - which has slumped 16 percent so far this year - and continuing antitrust problems in the United States and Europe."

Comments

Ballmer shouldn't step down.

[LiquidCoooled]

He should become the chairman.

Afterall, he is qualified.

Thank you, I'll be here all night.

Re:Ballmer shouldn't step down.

[OctoberSky]

Sorry man, I ran out of Mod Points yesterday. Although your joke is cheesey and obvious, it is better than what I came up with.

"HEADLINE: Ballmers follows Gates' lead, chairs everywhere breath sigh of relief"

Re:Ballmer shouldn't step down.

[Anonymous Coward]

Listen up, if I hear just one more Ballmer joke, I'm going to f**king kill every single one of you! Thanks, Steve B.

Re:Ballmer shouldn't step down.

[hasbeard]

Yes, I think the chair jokes are on their last legs.

Re:Ballmer shouldn't step down.

[aplusjimages]

Oh and they give you insightful. You ask and they do. Mod this as brilliant.

Re:Ballmer shouldn't step down.

[Winckle]

He was speaking in terms of cool, not dollars.

Leave Ballmer in place

[Iphtashu Fitz]

The entire linux community (and probably Mac as well) is strongly in favor of him remaining!

Word

[mazzarin]

Right, why don't they bring a bunch of new MBA students in to replace them. The fresh new non-tech oriented ideas will surely revitalize the company. /sarcasm meter explodes

Re:Word

[Gilmoure]

They should hire the CEO from Pepsi. Does he want to sell sugar water all his life?

While we're at it ..

[Entropy]

# Comments are for wusses
chant()
    for {Microsoft.Employees}
        do
        print "Why %borg should step down." (Microsoft.Employees)

rejoice()
    for a = 1 to 1000000000
# This comment does nothing, like comments are good for anything anyways.
    print "REJOICE! The evil Empire is dead! Long live the mighty penguin!"

main()
    while Microsoft.Exists=1
        chant()
    rejoice()

Re:While we're at it ..

[Alioth]

Don't forget:

public void runMicrosoft(String stuffToDo) throws Chair
{
  if(stuffToDo == "kill fucking Google")
  {
      throw new Chair("executive swivel");
  }
.....
}

Re:While we're at it ..

[TheOtherChimeraTwin]

Uhmmm.... Last I checked the Yankees are alive and doing fine. In fact they lead the American League East, 1 game over some team from Boston.

Look OctoberSky, this is a technology news site, not a sports news site. So you can take your little football jokes somewhere else where they will appreciate them.

Microsoft without Ballmer

[layer3switch]

is like zoo without monkey.
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=1704605405 04066962

i have three words for you

[Anonymous Coward]

i love this company

Re:The heir apparent.

[RsG]

heck, the parodies practically write themselves

Only in Soviet Russia.

There he is!! In the window on the left. GET HIM!

[Anonymous Coward]

Armed with pitchforks and torches, the angry mob of investors and users converged upon the Microsoft campus in Redmond. Chairman Bill had long left the area for the safety of other countries. Although his travels were charitable in name, The Chairman's main intent was to place large moats between him and the beligerent American mobs. And now, the evil president created by the chairman was left to his own devices. President Ballmer was trapped. And there were only a few chairs left in the room. He began to panic; what could he throw to show his might?

Re:But what will he do next?

[ianlee74]

http://blog.wired.com/fightclub/index.album?i=0

He should step down

[Billosaur]

Before Redmond runs out of chairs.

Re:Pundits Gone Wild!

[nutshell42]

"It's not likely that Rob Enderle will stay loyal to Gates and Ballmer as they step down as the company's Dynamic Duo of Evil", says Nuthell Fortytwo, principal analyst at the Nutshell Group, who has watched Slashdot (Dupes) for almost 7 years. "When you get into a cycle like this, the founders go reasonably soon after each other, and the astroturfers try to get into the good graces of their new masters" says Fortytwo.

Tags

[palad1]

Tags : Chair (tagging beta)

Now we need to mod tags as well ;)

Re:The heir apparent.

[fuzzix]

Since when have Microsoft products been cheap?

They've always been very cheap and very expensive.

Re:Actually, Wall Street would love that

[tb3]

Oh, oh, I know this one! They should hire Carly Fiorina! She could wreck Microsoft in no time flat!

We need him!

[antdude]

We need him so we can tease him of his monkey dances, f**king killings, chair throwings, etc. Bill Gates didn't have anything funny like that! Steve had characters. [grin]

Re:more info on the EU anti-trust case

[bladesjester]

I didn't even notice his username until you mentioned it. I nearly sprayed tea across my monitor.

I can see it now - him standing on his desk, 25lb IBM keyboard in hand yelling "Code! COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODE!!!!!!!!!"

Re:The heir apparent.

[thomasgulch]

Wait until walmart merges with mickeysoft and Haliburton, and the CEO retires to become president of the US of A.

Actually

[Trogre]

I think Ballmer is doing a superb job. Please don't get rid of him.

The sooner he runs that two-bit company into the ground the sooner us IT professionals can get on with our lives.