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NES Nudity Galore - The JUSTIN BAILEY Conspiracy

Posted by timothy on from the n-completely-s-f-w dept.

Ben Mallahan writes "The debate has raged for years over the origins of the infamous JUSTIN BAILEY code for the original Metroid; but now the truth has finally come out. Brace yourself for the story of the biggest cover-up in video game history ... and a healthy dose of 8-bit nudity!" You've been warned. This short was produced by Ben Makes Movies.com, and I got hooked into watching a few of the other shorts there as well.

103 comments

  1. Welcome to facebook by QuantumG · · Score: 3, Interesting

    That's right, Slashdot is now posting Internet memes.. doors are open.

    --
    How we know is more important than what we know.
    1. Re:Welcome to facebook by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      These are truly the last days.

    2. Re:Welcome to facebook by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      First post!

      In Soviet Russia, doors open YOU!

      1. Slashdot posts Internet memes
      2. ???
      3. Profits

  2. I can't believe... by AKAImBatman · · Score: 4, Insightful

    ...that was posted. Dear God. Someone mark the date. Slashdot just died today.

    --
    Javascript + Nintendo DSi = DSiCade
    1. Re:I can't believe... by pembo13 · · Score: 1

      While it is really sad that this made it to the front page. The vid itself was funny.

      --
      "Thanks for all the money you paid to us. We've used it to buy off ISO among other things" -Microsoft
    2. Re:I can't believe... by Stormwatch · · Score: 3, Funny

      No, it didn't. It did the leap just fine, and the shark did not touch it.

      --
      Circumcision is child abuse.
    3. Re:I can't believe... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Insightful

      Oh, come on, guys. Slashdot is now officially dead because they posted a tongue-in-cheek story about a videogame many of us grew up with? This article probably appeals to a great number of us, and nobody is forcing you to read it. Hell, it isn't even a full article on the main page--it's just a one-line "preview" that sits between actual articles. Something you could have easily skipped over if you aren't a Metroid fan, or for that matter, a fan of humour in general.

      It took about a thousand times more effort to whine about this article than it would have taken to ignore it completely. You just want attention, right?

    4. Re:I can't believe... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Insightful

      You are surprised that 8 bit nudity made it to the front page of a site largely run by someone calling himself "Command Her Taco"?

    5. Re:I can't believe... by nschubach · · Score: 3, Insightful

      Interesting, sure. Funny? I guess that depends.

      I was actually more interested in the REAL story of who Justin Bailey was from the code and why his name was used. A comment below linking to Wikipedia was worth more to me than the cheesy video. Sorry.

      --
      Every time I start to have faith in humanity, I ruin it by driving to work between 7 and 8 am.
    6. Re:I can't believe... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Slashdot died a long time ago. it was never good...

    7. Re:I can't believe... by Workaphobia · · Score: 2

      The article summary looks like utter crap, so can some one please spare me the pain of having to click the link myself and just tell the rest of us exactly what the fuss is about?

      --
      Evidently, the key to understanding recursion is to begin by understanding recursion. The rest is easy.
    8. Re:I can't believe... by DimmO · · Score: 1

      err, The date is written right at the top of the post. it's already marked. good times.

    9. Re:I can't believe... by Shadow+Wrought · · Score: 1
      Slashdot just died today.

      Not until Netcraft confirms it!

      --
      If brevity is the soul of wit, then how does one explain Twitter?
    10. Re:I can't believe... by sesshomaru · · Score: 1
      It's basically an Internet comedy youtube video about video games, except it isn't funny and has a lot of really bad tranny porn in it.

      I once read a review of the Batman and Robin movie that said, "one man's homoerotic fantasy. see it, but tear your own eyes out first" which applies equally to this video.

      If you'd like to see something funny on youtube about video games, might I suggest Ben "Yahtzee" Crowshaw's Review of the Darkness Demo. That's actually good and entertaining, and doesn't fill you with existential horror.

      --
      "MIT betrayed all of its basic principles."
    11. Re:I can't believe... by Darby · · Score: 1

      No, it didn't. It did the leap just fine, and the shark did not touch it.

      Even the shark knows enough to wait for the dupe.

  3. Peach! NOOOOO! by Gat0r30y · · Score: 1

    So many hours playing mario just to find that princess peach... I'm so disillusioned right now...

    --
    Prediction: The real iPhone killer is going to be sex robots from Japan. Think about it.
    1. Re:Peach! NOOOOO! by rrkap · · Score: 2, Funny

      Quick, someone, rule 34 on Princess Peach!

      No, I don't care about my karma any longer...

      --
      I like my beverages with warning labels!
    2. Re:Peach! NOOOOO! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Informative

      http://rule34.paheal.net/post/list/peach/1 This is OH SO not safe for work or your childhood memories.

    3. Re:Peach! NOOOOO! by pla · · Score: 4, Funny

      Quick, someone, rule 34 on Princess Peach!

      Oh, for shame! You at least need to do a GIS (warning: NSFW!) before invoking Rule 34. Hell, we even have Peach/Daisy lesbo action by the third image. Not even a challenge. ;-)

      For that matter, even Bowser turns up porn on the first page. Some topics make it just too easy. Now,"TV Tray Tables"[*], there you have a challenge.



      (3rd page, for those really really bored).

    4. Re:Peach! NOOOOO! by 19thNervousBreakdown · · Score: 1

      ham pita

      --
      <xml><I><am><so><damn>Web 2.0</damn></so></am></I></xml>
    5. Re:Peach! NOOOOO! by Eli+Gottlieb · · Score: 1

      OW MY SOUL. My precious, precious soul... Why have you so ruined it?

    6. Re:Peach! NOOOOO! by religious+freak · · Score: 1

      Wait a minute, I call shenanigans. I did a Google for "TV Tray Tables" and didn't see anything. Went to page four. Am I missing some kind of rule 34 trick here?

      --
      If you can read this... 01110101 01110010 00100000 01100001 00100000 01100111 01100101 01100101 01101011
    7. Re:Peach! NOOOOO! by pla · · Score: 1

      Wait a minute, I call shenanigans. I did a Google for "TV Tray Tables" and didn't see anything.

      Heh... Okay, in fairness, I didn't find any outright porn in the first few pages. I did find some rather "racy" pics in the first few pages, though.

      The order appears to have changed since I posted that, but the one I specifically meant looked like some sort of European beer ad (which I can't find at all, now). I also found one of a Vargas girl a few pages later (though now appearing on page 16, and I know I didn't look that far before).

      BTW, if you search Google for "page three girls", you'll appreciate my comment more (no joke, this time).

  4. Entertainment? by Faylone · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Isn't this what the Idle section is for?

    1. Re:Entertainment? by f1r3f0g · · Score: 1

      Isn't this what Digg is for?

  5. No, seriously, how the hell did this make main? by Draconix · · Score: 5, Insightful

    I don't think even Fark would greenlight this. _Maybe_ to the videos section.

    --
    By reading this you acknowledge that you have read it.
  6. "The Goomba has been jumped" by 4g1vn · · Score: 1

    The was very cool!

  7. Never thought I'd see the day by 19thNervousBreakdown · · Score: 4, Funny

    5/7 NEVER FORGET.

    --
    <xml><I><am><so><damn>Web 2.0</damn></so></am></I></xml>
    1. Re:Never thought I'd see the day by rrkap · · Score: 3, Funny

      Given the nature of Slashdot's death, I think that should be:

      5/7 NEVAR FORGET

      --
      I like my beverages with warning labels!
    2. Re:Never thought I'd see the day by Minwee · · Score: 1

      Given the nature of Slashdot's death, I think that should be:

      5/7 NEVAR FORGET

      I think you meant "5/7, 5/9, 5/12, 5/13, 6/2, and 8/14 (so far) -- NEVER FORGET".

    3. Re:Never thought I'd see the day by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      MOAR SAMIUS PLZ

    4. Re:Never thought I'd see the day by Yvan256 · · Score: 3, Funny

      Never forget 0.714285714285714?

    5. Re:Never thought I'd see the day by Captain+Splendid · · Score: 1

      Given the nature of Slashdot's death, I think that should be:

      5/7 NEVAR FORGET


      And, given the nature of Slashdot's nationality, I think that should be:

      5/7 NEVAR FORGET. Now, let's go invade the Ladies' Home Journal forums.
      --
      Linux, you magnificent bastard, I read the fucking manual!
    6. Re:Never thought I'd see the day by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      What happened on the 5th of July? (AU/UK Date format :P)

    7. Re:Never thought I'd see the day by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Oh, they're probably just going to dupe this story on that day.

    8. Re:Never thought I'd see the day by Lectoid · · Score: 1

      I meant to mod your comment funny, buy my pointer jumped and clicked on overrated. I am posting to remove my mod. Sorry about that.

      --
      Is it just me, or do you hate it when people say "Is it just me..."?
  8. I for one welcome our shark jumping overlords by Omestes · · Score: 4, Funny

    Hmmm... I've been reading /. for years, and have come to expect a certain standard (or lack thereof) for the front page, this... though...

    Is the dumbest thing I've ever seen here.

    Who the hell is this "Ben Mallahan", and would it be okay to break his knee caps? Notice I don't pick on Timothy, some things are expected.

    Perhaps its April Fools somewhere in the universe?

    Is it god hinting at me that I should spend more time wading though the Obama spam on Reddit?

    Has Slashdot jumped the shark?

    Is there a cowboy neal option?

    --
    A patriot must always be ready to defend his country against his government. -edward abbey
    1. Re:I for one welcome our shark jumping overlords by Kjella · · Score: 1

      Is there a cowboy neal option? I for one would rather not see a CowboyNeal option... especially not if he's the pixelated character.
      --
      Live today, because you never know what tomorrow brings
    2. Re:I for one welcome our shark jumping overlords by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      >Who the hell is this "Ben Mallahan"

      Someone whose video just got a 1-star ("poor") vote from me.

    3. Re:I for one welcome our shark jumping overlords by lgw · · Score: 2, Funny

      Has Slashdot jumped the shark? No, /. has jumped the Goomba!
      --
      Socialism: a lie told by totalitarians and believed by fools.
    4. Re:I for one welcome our shark jumping overlords by Lisandro · · Score: 1

      Is the dumbest thing I've ever seen here.

      Fucking A.

      Who the hell is this "Ben Mallahan",

      Internet meme dork of the month, it seems...

      and would it be okay to break his knee caps?

      Yes. In fact, partial credit for trying.

      Notice I don't pick on Timothy, some things are expected.

      Never mind. Forget that partial credit.

      Perhaps its April Fools somewhere in the universe?

      God, i hope. This is the lamest story i've seen on /. in years. Hell, i think it's the lamest story i've ever seen here.

      Is it god hinting at me that I should spend more time wading though the Obama spam on Reddit?

      It would only be clearer if he posted a damn billboard on a cloud. Atleast you might caugth a glimpse of something useful there!

      Has Slashdot jumped the shark?

      Like an olympic pole jumper.

      Is there a cowboy neal option?

      No way. That would make it, you know, funny.

  9. Congrats! by bcdm · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Congratulations, Slashdot, on your great accomplishment! Almost 11 years online before completely jumping the shark!

    --
    I can has sig?
    1. Re:Congrats! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      They've jumped so far over the shark that they've reset the counter back to zero.

    2. Re:Congrats! by Profane+MuthaFucka · · Score: 4, Funny

      They overflowed the shark?

      --
      Fascism trolls keeping me up every night. When I starts a preachin', he HITS ME WITH HIS REICH!
    3. Re:Congrats! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      In Soviet Russia, the shark overflows Slashdot?

    4. Re:Congrats! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      FAIL!

      In Soviet Russia, shark jumps Slashdot!

    5. Re:Congrats! by antic · · Score: 1

      A while back, not a week would pass on Slashdot without something ridiculous being posted, me thinking "Oh dear, that's lame" and the shark-jumping comments emerging from others.

      Things had been decent recently, that is, until this item.

      I don't know about jumping the shark because we'll all be back tomorrow and there will be interesting stories in the future, but yes, this entry was really quite poor.

      I register my -1 to this story too.

      --
      'Thats they exact same thing a banana wrench monkey.'
    6. Re:Congrats! by briuri · · Score: 1

      Sharkdotted.

    7. Re:Congrats! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The shark wrapped around, bit its own tail, consumed itself, and morphed into a completely new organism for which no FAIL synonym is yet strong enough to apply.

      This is a level of fail that the combined powers of Katz and Michael couldn't even overtake, and they sure as hell failed, even individually, awfully hard.

  10. I think there's a problem with my DNS server by Chlorus · · Score: 5, Funny

    The domain slashdot.org is redirecting to digg.com for some reason. And there might be a problem with my browser's cache, because it looks just like slashdot save for the news stories.

  11. /. has my respect by Thondermonst · · Score: 1

    Thanks, I had a great laugh. Don't know what should be the problem. Please, enlighten me.

  12. What? No rickroll? by Malevolent+Tester · · Score: 3, Funny

    What the hell are youtube links coming to these days?

    --
    If you haven't made a developer cry, you've wasted a day.
  13. Digg article up. by Aaron+England · · Score: 5, Funny

    no text.

  14. They should change the name by Nero+Nimbus · · Score: 2, Funny

    They should change the name of this place to //./

    1. Re:They should change the name by irby0 · · Score: 1

      Haha; how did this not get modded hilarious?

    2. Re:They should change the name by geekboy642 · · Score: 1

      I, for one, don't have a clue what he's talking about. And it's really tough to Google punctuation these days. And for some reason I had 15 mod points when I logged in, so I really wanted to go on a mad modding rampage.

      --
      Just another "DOJ fascist authoritarian totalitarian bootlicker" -- Zeio
    3. Re:They should change the name by irby0 · · Score: 1

      Looks like an ASCII version of "the shocker" to me.

      I could be wrong in my interpretation, however.

    4. Re:They should change the name by Nero+Nimbus · · Score: 1

      That's an interesting idea, but no. To keep this short, it's a reference to the *chan boards, and /b/ in particular.

  15. Ben is Ben by Saint_Waldo · · Score: 1

    ben@benmakesmovies.com got hooked into watching a few of the other shorts on Ben Makes Movies? Really? Who'd-a-thunk?

    1. Re:Ben is Ben by Digi-John · · Score: 3, Insightful

      To be fair, it was the editor (timothy) who said he got hooked into watching the other videos. Still, remember the days when you had to wait for someone else to find your stuff and post it? Then you got to show up in the comments halfway down and say something like "Oh haha, wondered what was hitting our server so hard!"
      These days half the submissions seem to be "I just wrote an amazingly content-less blog post about Microsoft, check it out and give me ad revenue".

      --
      Klingon programs don't timeshare, they battle for supremacy.
  16. No. by urcreepyneighbor · · Score: 1

    Sweet feathery Jesus.

    --
    "The fight for freedom has only just begun." - Geert Wilders
  17. Video would have been better by badboy_tw2002 · · Score: 5, Funny

    If that guy's eyes had rolled out of his head at the end. He looks like the hunchback from Young Frankenstien and Gareth from The Office had a baby who was then raised by the Cookie Monster.

  18. As the Comic Book Guy would say... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Insightful

    WORST. SUBMISSION. EVAR.

  19. My god, it's full of garbage by Alzheimers · · Score: 4, Funny

    That was the dumbest, stupidest, most idiotic thing I've EVER seen on the internet.

    And I've been to SomethingAwful.com

    1. Re:My god, it's full of garbage by Yvan256 · · Score: 1

      You haven't seen it all until you encounter this page.

    2. Re:My god, it's full of garbage by vux984 · · Score: 1

      You haven't seen it all until you encounter this page.

      Someone should open a restaurant there.

    3. Re:My god, it's full of garbage by Yvan256 · · Score: 1

      It's just the end of the Internet, not the end of the Universe.

  20. real origin of the JUSTIN BAILEY code by j0nb0y · · Score: 4, Informative

    Very humorous video.

    Wikipedia of course has the real story:

    "...the JUSTIN BAILEY password is a total fluke. If you play around with Metroid's password system (something you can do with the Metroid Password Generator program, found in Fan Apps), you can come up with other names and words that work as passwords. The "Justin Bailey" code is one which was found early on and happened to work pretty well, so it became widely reported."

    I always remember Kid Icarus that used the same password system. It too had an interesting fluke password:

    ICARUS FIGHTS
    MEDUSA ANGELS

    Hours of fun for the whole family.

    --
    If you had super powers, would you use them for good, or for awesome?
  21. /.b0rk'd by ViralInfection · · Score: 1

    5/7 NEVAR FORGET

    I will miss the days of high quality news

  22. What a waste of time by rabitd · · Score: 1

    WTH is going on around here?

    1. Re:What a waste of time by Tailsfan · · Score: 1

      I donno, but this guuy knows hoe to paint nude NES sprites.

  23. Yes, they jumped the shark... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    ...but alas could not avoid the laser.

  24. Dang sound card by Tailsfan · · Score: 1

    What is he saying.

    1. Re:Dang sound card by roguetrick · · Score: 1

      He said slashdot jumped the goomba.

      --
      -The world would be a better place if everyone had a hoverboard
    2. Re:Dang sound card by Tailsfan · · Score: 1

      I mean the guy on the video.

    3. Re:Dang sound card by Tailsfan · · Score: 1

      oh, i got it on my wii. I hear it.

  25. Oh noes! by BenMakesMovies · · Score: 2, Informative

    Thanks for featuring this :) Some of you people take ur internets a bit too seriously... but I appreciate the comments nonetheless. We had a fun time making this, and I'm glad that people are getting to see it!

    1. Re:Oh noes! by Omestes · · Score: 4, Insightful

      I don't take "ur" internet very seriously, but... I do like everything in its place, and while your thing has its place, it isn't this place (unless under the barren wasteland that is Idle) for your thing.

      Notice the title "news for nerds", you only got half of the criteria. I came here expecting both, which, oddly, is why I still come here.

      To remove the aura of flamebait-y-ness, your thing was funny and clever. But next time, please, submit it to Digg. I don't like being advertised at in the incorrect channels.

      --
      A patriot must always be ready to defend his country against his government. -edward abbey
    2. Re:Oh noes! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Submitting your OWN "entertainment" production as a news story is pretty low. This whole news "article" should be modded (-1 Offtopic, Flamebait).

      I ran (for 4 years) a site that was featured on /. a half-dozen times or so. We didn't submit our own stories; we just produced them, and if our readers felt it was /.-worthy, our readers (not our staff, and certainly not our editors) would submit it. Submitting your own work is just advertising; there's no news, there's no story.

      PS: Your works are un-funny. Good luck at doing better in the future.

  26. I'm not clicking on this shit by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Stupid nerd shit

  27. I thought I was too mature for this... by Hojima · · Score: 1

    ...until I nearly peed myself laughing at the 8-bit dong on Peach

    --
    Help fight spam
  28. Hmm... by sesshomaru · · Score: 1
    I watched the first few seconds of the video... I think I got as far as "they're after me."

    It was like falling into Hell.

    If Pinhead shows up, I'm telling him it was Timothy who opened the Box.

    --
    "MIT betrayed all of its basic principles."
    1. Re:Hmm... by sesshomaru · · Score: 1
      Actually, speaking of this, this article about an actual 8-bit product that few know about may help ease the pain of this content-less 8-Bit news story:

      History of the NES game that never was: Hellraiser from Color Dreams

      --
      "MIT betrayed all of its basic principles."
  29. Zelda commercial by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    The whole opening reminded me of the original TV spots for Zelda where the guy is yelling the names of all the monsters into the camera interspersed with shots of the critters in-game.

  30. Re: No, seriously, how the hell did this make main by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I submitted it there.

    It went red.

  31. The Lone Gunmen are Dead. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    http://slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=02/04/22/0222221

    That's when Slashdot died for me!

    1. Re:The Lone Gunmen are Dead. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      http://slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=02/04/22/0222221


      Damn it. I was just going to watch that on DVD tonight. Thanks for the spoiler warning.
    2. Re:The Lone Gunmen are Dead. by xrayspx · · Score: 2, Funny

      You have no idea how important that post is. Chris DiBona admits to being "Evil".

      This Chris DiBona. So much for Google's only rule. This thread is conspiracy theory central apparently.

      --
      I like music
  32. Slashdot effect? by Awptimus+Prime · · Score: 1

    That video has only had 3700 views since it was originally posted. If you are to believe /. has an 'effect' this is proof to the contrary.

    1. Re:Slashdot effect? by Killjoy_NL · · Score: 1

      It proves that we do not only not RTFA, we don't even watch TFA :D

      --
      This is the sig that says NI (again)
    2. Re:Slashdot effect? by Awptimus+Prime · · Score: 1

      While working for a to remained unnamed web hosting provider, we had several sites get "slashdotted". Most often it was just a few hits, but at a time when the 250 other hosts on the box was getting hammered by the primetime bandwidth peak. A store application on another site would fail, taking all the sites on the same box and a thousand posters on /. would all pet their penii in unison about how /. took it down, meanwhile it was usually aunt betty placed an order and the system blew up just like it would have if nobody was hitting the site.

  33. What it is and why. by flayzernax · · Score: 1

    http://entertainment.slashdot.org/

    with an emphasis on entertainment

    i would like to point out that its not GAMES but shows up under games

    More then likely this is some form of test against the slashdot community.

    Testing what is what geeks will accept amoung the well established elite ranks of slashdotters.

    It might be a test by the Corporate slashdot to see if its readers would like an entertainment section much like cnn.coms entertainment section.

    See - > http://www.cnn.com/SHOWBIZ/ were u go if u click the big link that says entertaiment on cnn's website

    Perhaps one of the major networks is purchasing slashdot.org and want to integrate Paris Hilton like idolatry into geekdom.

    Anyway the movie was only minerly entertaining, if it was Steve Ballmer instead of a young myspace kid... it would have been even better...

    The fact that its a recent trend on slashdot to call people you disagree with, noobz and myspace kids is why it got posted, to poke the old geeks with sticks so t speak.

    Because we are all insensative-clods and you all just got a little bit more sentimental about your old website hangout... aaaawwwww.

    1. Re:What it is and why. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      http://entertainment.slashdot.org/ with an emphasis on entertainment

      Give me a fucking break. Swallowing thumbtacks would be more entertaining than this. While watching a Ben Stiller movie. At the dentist.

  34. This isn't news! by DFENS619 · · Score: 1

    Slashdots tagline is: News for nerds, stuff that matters... this story violates both statements

    1. Re:This isn't news! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Actually, its half and half... Stuff for nerds...

    2. Re:This isn't news! by mark_hill97 · · Score: 1

      no, not even nerds can appreciate that garbage. thats "Crap for Losers"

  35. /./b/ by psergiu · · Score: 1

    Looks like this is the first post in the new slashdot Misc section: /b/

    /./b/

    --
    1% APY, No fees, Online Bank https://captl1.co/2uIErYq Don't let your $$$ sit in a no-interest acct.
    1. Re:/./b/ by tepples · · Score: 1

      Looks like this is the first post in the new slashdot Misc section: /b/ I beg to differ.
  36. I kept waiting for the funny... by analog_line · · Score: 3, Informative

    ...but nothing happened.

  37. Buried. by Tarlus · · Score: 1

    OMG THIS IS SO BURIED


    ...oh, wait, this isn't Digg. Could've fooled me. Slashdot is now linking to a Youtube video that uses "Princess Penis" like it's a clever joke. (That's as far as I got before closing it.)

    This is what we call "jumping the shark."

    --
    /* No Comment */
  38. Slashdot has jumped the shark by Dardin · · Score: 0

    The end is here.

  39. JUSTIN BAILEY? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I always used all 9s for the top row and all Ks for the bottom row in metroid, seems to have a different hair color for samus than what is displayed in wikipedia. Found by accident as a kid

  40. Fire Timothy by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Interesting

    I'm deadly serious. Let Timothy go.