Darth Vader Robs Long Island Bank
Apparently the destruction of the second Death Star has stretched the Galactic Empire's coffers so thin that Lord Vader himself is robbing banks. From the article: "Impotent Rebel Alliance security forces tell Newsday (paywall) that Vader marched into a Chase bank in Setauket around 11:30 a.m. today. Brandishing a completely unnecessary handgun — as he had the power to choke the oxygen out every teller's throat — the fallen Jedi demanded cash."
Hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side, kid......
I want peace on earth and goodwill toward man.
We are the United States Government! We don't do that sort of thing.
move along
But I think playing the Imperial March on a portable speaker while he walked in drew a bit too much attention.
One that actually walked into the bank, one that did the voice demanding the money, and one that will go to jail for showing his face for a few seconds.
There's a spot in User Info for World of Warcraft account names? Really?
At the bank they did not know the power of the Dark Side...
---
"No! Alderaan is peaceful! We have no weapons, you can't possibly... "
Death Star plans not found in main computer.
Calling someone a "hater" only means you can not rationally rebut their argument.
Just go to the next convention, and look for the guy who is no longer living in his mother's basement.
Couldn't Cheney have just gone on a lecture tour like everyone else?
"I find the lack of cash in this paper bag... disturbing."
"If this is a Citibank branch, where is your supervisor?"
Darth Vader robbing a bank? Far more cool than the entirety of the prequels.
Freedom is drinking a beer in the park when you're supposed to be at work.
"Who's gonna give me a loan, jack-hole? You!? You got an ATM on that torso lite-brite!?" - Emperor Palpatine
"I find your lack of interest in your savings accounts disturbing." --- "The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant to a well diversified IRA."--- "Asteroids do not concern me, Teller. I want that ship, not excuses. Now get me a low percentage loan."--- "When I left you I was but an accountant. Now I am the bank manager."
Care killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back.
The main reason is that while this world contains some wonderful things in it, it also contains lots and lots of bad stuff. Being able to find humor in bad situations can make life more bearable despite some of its horrors. Laughing at a situation or event doesn't necessarily mean that we'd chose for it to come about, it's a way of trying to enjoy life despite living in an often painful world.
That's no Bank;
It's a credit union.
He has altered the deal, pray he doesn't alter it any further!
Wanna buy a shirt?
https://www.redbubble.com/people/stealthfinger/shop?asc=u
Operator: Hello Tip line
Caller: Yes I'm calling about the Darth Vader bank robbery
Operator: OK go ahead..
Caller: Yes the guy who did it lives in a galaxy far far away.
Operator: OK how does this help
Caller: Well it doesn't but I know he is on a large moon.. Wait that's no moon it's.. it's... massive......
Operator: Who is this?
Caller: It's Han {static}
Operator: I think we have a bad connection say again
Caller: It's Han {static} and I am near the deathstar located {static}
Operator: OK we have your location we are sending the authorities
Caller: OK can you hear me now?
Operator: Yes.
Caller: OK you will need to fly down the thermal exhaust port and fire a Photon Torpedo
Operator: um why?
Caller: Do you want to catch the guy or not {noise in the background} hold on. SHUT UP CHEWY
{Call cuts off}
Was it:
a. May the cash be with you.
b. If you shoot me, I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine.
c. The power to rob a bank is insignificant next to the power of the force.
i'm pretty sure luke wears camo pants on endor, and that's after he's become a jedi. I apologise for the mandatory fanboy pedantry.
(1.21 gigawatts) / (88 miles per hour) = 30 757 874 newtons
How is robbing a bank amusing or entertainment? Just because the guy was in a costume that nerds might think is cool? Uhmm... I don't think so.
Is that you Ned Flanders?
Something can be both evil and funny at the same time.
You're right that it's vile for someone to threaten another person with a gun. It's not that aspect of this which we're all laughing at. We're lauging at someone doing something grave while dressed up as a movie character, and at the irony / apropriateness / etc. of having Darth Vader perform an actual evil act.
I'd like to make another point. I think you're facing a dichotomy between what you think people should find funny vs. what (most) people do find funny.
In my other replies to you, I was trying to explain why I think people do find the story funny.
As to whether or not we should, that's an entirely separate ball of wax. But I for one don't have too much control over what I do find funny. I reckon that's largely part of the human condition.
Obviously the act of robbing a bank is not funny at all. The robber choosing to use a Darth Vader costume to conceal his identity is fucking hilarious.
Insert funny smart-ass comment here.
Anything can be found funny, from a certain point of view.
Anything can be found funny, from a certain point of view.
I don't think we have much control over what we find amusing. Is your concern that we're publicly making merry of this situation, and in doing so we seem to be either (a) condoning what happened, or (b) doing something that might effectivly rub salt in the psychological wounds of the bank teller?
Or are you saying that it's in poor taste that we even find this situation funny in the first place? Because I can understand applying "poor taste" to how we act, but not to what our original emotional response (amusement) is to this story. Perhaps instead of saying our feelings are in poor taste, you should say you're "disappointed" or "dismayed" that so many people had a feeling of amusement about the story?
I'm so tired I initially misread the title as saying "Darth Vader robes long and black", to which my reaction was "yeah, I knew that- how's that news?". Which in retrospect was actually funny. As you pointed out, humor is a great thing, but I believe for more reasons than that given by Heinlein to "Mike", who put it thus:
"I had thought -- I had been told -- that a 'funny' thing is a thing of a goodness. It isn't. Not ever is it funny to the person it happens to. Like that sheriff without his pants. The goodness is in the laughing itself. I grok it is a bravery . . . and a sharing... against pain and sorrow and defeat."
"What do you have an ATM in that chest LiteBrite of yours?"
If the only way you can accept an assertion is by faith, then you are conceding that it can't be taken on its own merits
Having a gun pointed your head is something that I'm sure that teller is liable to remember far less than pleasantly for a long, long, time to come. I'm glad that nobody got hurt, of course, but I simply cannot see this as amusing, and I find the fact that so many people apparently do (including marking me as a troll, above), to be in astonishingly poor taste with respect to the feelings of the people who could have potentially been killed.
I find your lack of perspective disturbing.
... his pin number is 1 2 3 4 5.
Does having a witty signature really indicate normality?
I'd like to make another point. I think you're facing a dichotomy between what you think people should find funny vs. what (most) people do find funny.
In my other replies to you, I was trying to explain why I think people do find the story funny.
As to whether or not we should, that's an entirely separate ball of wax. But I for one don't have too much control over what I do find funny. I reckon that's largely part of the human condition.
I think prescribing what people should find funny would lead to a very bleak world. Humour has nothing to do with morality, except perhaps when it's used as a tool to humiliate others. This is not the case here - and the guy you replied to has no way of knowing how the teller reacted or how he coped with the situation after it happened. In fact, a lot of people find humour a good way to work through traumatic experiences. Whenever I am under considerable stress, or something bad happens, sooner or later I'll find a way to look back and smile. I also think you are talking to a wall here. GP simply lacks the capacity to look at a situation from different perspectives while believing that his own perspective is morally superiour to everyone else's. A trait shared by religious zealots and fanatics, self-indignant extreme-right politicians, etc... ironically, the kind of people you and I would never describe as moral or ethical ;)
"I have altered the script, pray I do not alter it any further" -- Darth Lucas
No folly is more costly than the folly of intolerant idealism. - Winston Churchill
No. No!! That's not true. That's impossible!
Take off every Sig. For great justice.
walking up to the teller, I wonder if the teller thought, "I have a bad feeling about this"
"In true dialogue, both sides are willing to change" --Thich Nhat Hanh
Ease up kid! We are laughing at a dufus in a Darth Vader Costume. Why not cry to the Media for inserting the Darth Vader line in what you would obviously prefer to read nutjob in costume robs bank. Umm... I for one would read no further. However, Darth Vader robs bank deserves further scrutiny and yes a good laugh! Should I remind you that the authors intent is to drive traffic to his sight and thus increase add revenues. So don't whine to us because you find this tasteless and offensive. Turn the channel Chief!
Luke.... I am your robber.
You can only be young once, but you can be immature forever.
Having your people ruthlessly exterminated by an evil dictatorship arguably isn't funny. But that didn't stop Mel Brooks (who by the way, served in the Army whilst invading Germany) from making fun of Nazis and Hitler. Sometimes, the best way you can get revenge on someone is to laugh at them--paraphrasing Brooks.
Maybe having a gun put in your face can't ever be funny for a teller. Myself, I probably would have laughed right there on the spot, having been in more bleak situations. But trying to quantify what makes people laugh? That's even more ridiculous than Darth Vader robbing a bank.
Constitutional rights may be respected, repealed, or modified; but they must never be ignored.
Poor David Prouse, rock bottom indeed. Kinda cool he still fits in the suit.
My other sig is extremely clever...
Having a gun pointed your head is something that I'm sure that teller is liable to remember far less than pleasantly for a long, long, time to come.
Yeah for sure, but he lived, and I'm not him and don't know him.
"Comedy is tragedy plus distance" -- my high school English teacher.
or for a more twisted take:
"Tragedy is if I get a paper cut. . . . Comedy is if you fall into an open sewer and die." --Mel Brooks
The enemies of Democracy are
... the shoe polish he uses to keep his helmet shiny costs him an arm and a leg!
Or was that an arm and two legs?
"The future can only affect the present if there is room to write its influence off as a mistake." - Yakir Aharonov
It would've been more impressive if this was pulled off with a lightsaber. Another robber hit convenience stores with a bat'leth, after all:
http://entertainment.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=09/02/04/1456240