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They Finally Found Out We Like Our Computers

I'm Not There (1956) writes "Sociologist Clifford Nass is talking about how people think of their computers as something like human beings. In one of his experiments, Nass found that people are more willing to 'help' computers when the computer helped them previously: 'When people were then asked to help optimize the screen resolution on a computer where the program had been "helpful," they were much more likely to do so than with the less helpful version.' He also found that people evaluating software's performance were more forgiving if the evaluation was done on the same computer the software was tested on. Nass has recently published the book The Man Who Lied to His Laptop, in which he 'uses our interactions with machines to investigate how human relationships could be improved.'"

184 comments

  1. A proposition by amicusNYCL · · Score: 5, Funny

    Nass has recently published the book The Man Who Lied to His Laptop, in which he 'uses our interactions with machines to investigate how human relationships could be improved.'

    I propose forcing women to think like computers instead of like women. They would be much easier to interact with.

    --
    "Our two-party system is like a bowl of shit looking at itself in a mirror." - Lewis Black
    1. Re:A proposition by biryokumaru · · Score: 2, Funny

      I dunno, I already lie to my wife all the time and it doesn't seem to help.

      --
      When you're afraid to download music illegally in your own home, then the terrorists have won!
    2. Re:A proposition by theheadlessrabbit · · Score: 4, Funny

      I propose forcing women to think like computers instead of like women. They would be much easier to interact with.

      What? are you crazy? that would be horrible....Just imagine trying to have a conversation with a woman who continually pauses, buffers, and freezes as she is talking to you... ...damn, that actually sounds pretty awesome!

      --
      -I only code in BASIC.-
    3. Re:A proposition by Locke2005 · · Score: 2, Funny

      Sure, but bluescreening in the middle of a blowjob would be more than a little annoying...

      --
      I've abandoned my search for truth; now I'm just looking for some useful delusions.
    4. Re:A proposition by Fluffeh · · Score: 2, Funny

      a woman who continually pauses, buffers, and freezes as she is talking to you... ...damn, that actually sounds pretty awesome!

      Pretty awesome?! I can think of a couple of situations where that certainly isn't the best idea...

      Oh yeah, keep going!...
      *pauses*
      Don't stop... That's the one...
      *buffering*
      What?! No, keep going! Don't stop now! Now NOW!
      *blue screen*
      Fine. I'll just go have a wank...

      --
      Moved to http://soylentnews.org/. You are invited to join us too!
    5. Re:A proposition by Zero__Kelvin · · Score: 3, Insightful

      "I propose forcing women to think like computers instead of like women. They would be much easier to interact with."

      I guess you either haven't dealt with a women and/or used Windows lately.

      --
      Guns don't kill people; Physics kills people! - John Lithgow as Dick Solomon on Third Rock From The Sun
    6. Re:A proposition by tomhudson · · Score: 2, Funny

      I propose forcing women to think like computers instead of like women. They would be much easier to interact with.

      So logically, until you lose that beer gut, learn to pick your socks up off the floor, do laundry and dishes and clean up after you "help" by cooking and leaving a god-forsaken mess, and ask for directions when you're lost, you fail the unit testing process. Better be ready to go f$ck yourself :-)

    7. Re:A proposition by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      He's probably used OS X too often and became jaded.

    8. Re:A proposition by Capt.DrumkenBum · · Score: 0, Offtopic

      Windows sux... Just install Linux. :)

      --
      If I were God, wouldn't I protect my churches from acts of me?
    9. Re:A proposition by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Funny

      "I'm almost there! Almost! Now I am 39 years from it. Now I am 3 seconds! 99%.... 99%.... 99%...."

    10. Re:A proposition by Jurily · · Score: 1, Funny

      He's probably used OS X too often and became jaded.

      That would also explain why he doesn't deal with women.

    11. Re:A proposition by zach_the_lizard · · Score: 1

      And think of all the viruses you could get from her! Hmm....I think I'll get a model where all the hardware is Linux or *BSD compatible.

      --
      SSC
    12. Re:A proposition by zach_the_lizard · · Score: 2, Funny

      $>sudo fsck me

      That will be all

      --
      SSC
    13. Re:A proposition by jacquelinew · · Score: 1, Insightful

      I propose forcing women to think like computers instead of like women. They would be much easier to interact with.

      Given that your reaction to an unrelated article is a misogynistic 'joke,' the difficulties in your relations with women might not be on their end.

    14. Re:A proposition by Zero__Kelvin · · Score: 1

      He's probably used OS X too often and became jaded.

      That would also explain why he doesn't deal with women.

      You clearly haven't been to a Starbucks in the last few years.

      --
      Guns don't kill people; Physics kills people! - John Lithgow as Dick Solomon on Third Rock From The Sun
    15. Re:A proposition by captainlavender · · Score: 2, Funny

      Think that through again. "Three hours of sports equals one instance of sex. You have watched six hours; therefore sex is not necessary for two more days." Or, on a more misogynist note, how about when it takes you eight reboots to get her to make the damned baloney sandwich you need for work today?

    16. Re:A proposition by derGoldstein · · Score: 2, Funny

      I think I'll get a model where all the hardware is Linux or *BSD compatible.

      But then you're stuck with a rather crappy UI, and who wants that on a woman...

      --
      Entomologically speaking, the spider is not a bug, it's a feature.
    17. Re:A proposition by derGoldstein · · Score: 1

      Oh yeah, keep going!... *pauses* Don't stop... That's the one... *buffering* What?! No, keep going! Don't stop now! Now NOW!

      It's not the woman, it's her ISP. She's being throttled.

      --
      Entomologically speaking, the spider is not a bug, it's a feature.
    18. Re:A proposition by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      You may have to work a bit to get it running perfectly but you can get great eye-candy on such a system, it's not as if the default theme on windows actually looks good. Plus, if you learn how to talk to her, she'll do amazing stuff owners of a windows system wouldn't even imagine possible.

    19. Re:A proposition by amicusNYCL · · Score: 3, Insightful

      I don't think that's very misogynistic. While not disagreeing with your assessment, it's true that I can go out with a woman, learn all about the way she likes to be treated, what turns her on, off, etc, and then think I've got it all figured out. I'll go out with another, apparently similar, woman, and everything I know is now wrong. I give the same set of inputs, and I receive completely different outputs. Sometimes even faults, errors, and outright crashes. Sometimes it doesn't even have to be a different woman, just a different time or day. I do the same things I was doing a while ago, and I get a completely different response with no apparent rhyme or reason that I can detect prior to opening my mouth, all of a sudden there's just a purse flying at my head.

      Contrast that with writing code. No matter what computer I run a certain program on, if I give it the same inputs I'm guaranteed to get the same outputs, because the computer is doing the exact same thing the other one was (I realize it's not that simple, but you know what I'm saying).

      Contrast that with men, even. If you find a guy, and you figure out that he enjoys having a few beers out, followed by a blowjob, it's reasonably fair to assume that at any point in the future if you repeat your actions, he's going to respond the same way. Hell, I've been with women that I've slept with several times who one night decide they don't want to have sex right in the middle of sex. And yes, I'm sure you're thinking that's also my fault, but they did come back after the first several times.

      That's all I meant. I wasn't trying to be misogynistic, Sweet Cheeks. No reason to get your panties in a bunch.

      --
      "Our two-party system is like a bowl of shit looking at itself in a mirror." - Lewis Black
    20. Re:A proposition by jacquelinew · · Score: 3, Insightful

      I wasn't trying to be misogynistic

      Yeeeaaah, that's kinda what I was talking about. Congrats though, now I just figure you're not that great with people in general, most men I know are more interesting than you portray them too.

    21. Re:A proposition by froggymana · · Score: 3, Insightful

      The UI for Linux isn't bad. Its a lot better than Windows IMHO. There is always room for improvement too though. Personally though, the UI of a terminal doesn't get much better than what its at now.

      --
      "To prevent this day from getting any worse, I'll just read ERROR as GOOD THING" 1GJU8xLuDKDxEs4KLf8fAGyptoDsqvEsBT
    22. Re:A proposition by camperslo · · Score: 1

      No wonder those Mac guys smile suspiciously... they've been using Time Machine to go back and relive those favorite moments.

    23. Re:A proposition by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Insightful

      I've never understood this 'women are hard to understand" thing. It seems pretty easy to me, since they are just humans, after all. Perhaps if you spent less time thinking about sex you might notice what's going on?

    24. Re:A proposition by derGoldstein · · Score: 1

      Hell, I've been with women that I've slept with several times

      This is Slashdot, you insensitive clod.

      --
      Entomologically speaking, the spider is not a bug, it's a feature.
    25. Re:A proposition by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Informative

      Funny, the ones I meet already do think like computers. I try and get in their pants and it's "Access Denied".

    26. Re:A proposition by Tubal-Cain · · Score: 2, Informative

      The games may not be as visually interesting to a third party, but they're no less fun.

    27. Re:A proposition by Lord_of_the_nerf · · Score: 1

      I'd have problems with a marriage counselor asking me if I'd tried resetting my wife.

    28. Re:A proposition by amicusNYCL · · Score: 2, Informative

      And how exactly have I portrayed most men to be? I said that if you figure out what a guy likes, chances are he's going to keep liking that same thing. That sounds neither uninteresting nor interesting, just "normal".

      I'm glad that you can read so much into what I write that you're able to determine what kind of a person I am, though. I think we're making a connection here.

      --
      "Our two-party system is like a bowl of shit looking at itself in a mirror." - Lewis Black
    29. Re:A proposition by carp3_noct3m · · Score: 1

      Can we change the shell skins?...no I don't feel like Jessica Alba today, I'll go with Scarlet Johansson please.

      --
      "It's ok, I'm completely secure as long as my iron is off"
    30. Re:A proposition by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I propose forcing women to think like computers instead of like women. They would be much easier to interact with.

      Given that your reaction to an unrelated article is a misogynistic 'joke,' the difficulties in your relations with women might not be on their end.

      Aww c'mon, mod this up, she got him good :D

    31. Re:A proposition by chromas · · Score: 1

      "Have you tried turning her off and then on again?"

    32. Re:A proposition by Shadow+of+Eternity · · Score: 2, Funny

      Yeah but it's still statutory rape if you need wine to ply her.

      --
      A bullet may have your name on it but splash damage is addressed "To whom it may concern."
    33. Re:A proposition by Tubal-Cain · · Score: 1

      She's 19 now...

    34. Re:A proposition by aiht · · Score: 1

      "Have you tried turning her off and then on again?"

      You win at the internets!

    35. Re:A proposition by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      Fuck that. I'll lose weight and clean up after myself, but I'd sooner die than ask for directions.

    36. Re:A proposition by Attila+Dimedici · · Score: 1

      Contrast that with men, even. If you find a guy, and you figure out that he enjoys having a few beers out, followed by a blowjob, it's reasonably fair to assume that at any point in the future if you repeat your actions, he's going to respond the same way.

      And this is the mistake most men make. Once men figure out what they like, they see no reason to change. Women like mystery. It is hard to explain this without oversimplifying in a short post, but that is close. A friend who got married several years before I did first pointed this out to me. His wife argued with him about it for around a half hour before she finally agreed with him. Most of that time was spent with him making his point in different ways (although it would have taken significantly less time if he didn't get a kick out of pulling her chain) until she saw what he was getting at. They are still married, going on 25 years now.

      --
      The truth is that all men having power ought to be mistrusted. James Madison
    37. Re:A proposition by jedidiah · · Score: 1

      > Except games. And who wants a woman that won't let you play with her?

      Games and women really don't mix. You really don't want a woman that plays games.

      There's better more suitable hardware for playing games that comes with none of the BS and baggage.

      --
      A Pirate and a Puritan look the same on a balance sheet.
    38. Re:A proposition by siliconbunny · · Score: 1

      Imagine a Beowulf ... oh wait ...

    39. Re:A proposition by TheLink · · Score: 2, Funny

      You past the lying with your wife stage already?

      --
    40. Re:A proposition by yanyan · · Score: 3, Funny

      Get a chatroom, you two.

    41. Re:A proposition by archmcd · · Score: 1

      ...or Natalie Portman, naked and petrified.

      --
      I'm not an expert, but I play one on slashdot.
    42. Re:A proposition by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Women who want mystery shouldn't get married at all. Or should stick to marriages where they don't really get to know the other person. You want mystery? Just have some hot person fuck you, and just drop in mysteriously without warning to visit and fuck you every few months or so.

      Getting married is like going to a magic show and being able to see how some of it is done. Some people appreciate that. Some people think they would, but then they start preferring other magic shows with more "mystery"...

      They are wanting conflicting things.

      Same for those guys who like hot sluts, and then they marry a hot slut because she's a hot slut, and then are so disappointed that she still can't resist fucking other guys.

      Oh wait this is slashdot. It's like nerds that are GPL fanatics- freedom and everything, and then they get an iphone...

      If you want mystery in a marriage, just wait till you're older, and you both try to solve the mystery of the missing phone/remote. I know someone who found it in the fridge... ;)

      Or you stop remembering who the other person is and why they are sleeping next to you...

    43. Re:A proposition by amicusNYCL · · Score: 2, Interesting

      And this is the mistake most men make. Once men figure out what they like, they see no reason to change.

      I'm not sure if that's a mistake..

      Women like mystery.

      I understand, things like impulsiveness, surprises, and The Unknown are attractive. I enjoy setting things up like this for people who appreciate it, although I don't really like the convention that it's essentially the man's job to come up with everything. Maybe I've just dated the wrong women, but it seems like there are significantly more things expected of men than women. Even right down to the first meeting, traditionally it's the man's responsibility to approach the woman. It seems like the burden is always on the guy to find something new and exciting for the two to do. I just surprised my ex-girlfriend and current friend with a $5k custom guitar for her master's music degree graduation. She's a great girl, but I would have loved it if any one of my girlfriends had ever put in an effort to do something like that for me. Not even financially, just something fun and unexpected. I appreciate the draw, I just dislike how it's a man's responsibility to initiate everything. I understand there are women out there not like that, who actually are willing to give back everything they get, but it's pretty disheartening when every single one I've dated has shared at least that one trait.

      --
      "Our two-party system is like a bowl of shit looking at itself in a mirror." - Lewis Black
    44. Re:A proposition by systemeng · · Score: 1

      Just goes to show that women are not a Linear Time Invariant System.

    45. Re:A proposition by Shadow+of+Eternity · · Score: 0, Redundant

      ...Yeah... but it's still statutory rape if you need wine to ply her.

      --
      A bullet may have your name on it but splash damage is addressed "To whom it may concern."
    46. Re:A proposition by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Like this?

      Hey, could you help me dislodge this bit of mucus from my nose...? By the way, you're looking damn sexy tonight.

    47. Re:A proposition by SCPRedMage · · Score: 1

      I know someone who found it in the fridge... ;)

      Amusingly enough, I found my keys there once.

      In a Taco Bell bag.

      --
      My sig can beat up your sig.
    48. Re:A proposition by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Yeah, but if it was a woman, it wouldn't.

    49. Re:A proposition by mr_mischief · · Score: 1

      Of which "the UI" do you speak?

    50. Re:A proposition by BluBrick · · Score: 2, Funny

      Imagine a Beowulf ... oh wait ...

      It's called a Harem!

      --
      Ahh - My eye!
      The doctor said I'm not supposed to get Slashdot in it!
    51. Re:A proposition by Eivind · · Score: 1

      I realize it's meant as a joke. But really. Just give it a rest already, okay ? It's not funny. There's plenty of women around slashdot and other nerdy ventures. And there'd be even more, if not for stupid comments like that.

    52. Re:A proposition by AlamedaStone · · Score: 2, Insightful

      I propose forcing women to think like computers instead of like women. They would be much easier to interact with.

      Given that your reaction to an unrelated article is a misogynistic 'joke,' the difficulties in your relations with women might not be on their end.

      Aww c'mon, mod this up, she got him good :D

      He was saying he had trouble interacting with women, and she kicked him in the teeth. That's not a win for feminism.

      --
      "All these years believing you're the signified monkey, only to find out you're just a big hunk of nobody cares."
    53. Re:A proposition by juasko · · Score: 0

      All fine as long as they dont start to think like windows, Windows has detected new hardware, installing new hardware.

    54. Re:A proposition by V!NCENT · · Score: 1

      Excuse me, but KDE 4.5 kicks the shit out of Mac OS X' Disney UI, unless you're a pedo...

      --
      Here be signatures
    55. Re:A proposition by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Contrast that with writing code. No matter what computer I run a certain program on, if I give it the same inputs I'm guaranteed to get the same outputs, because the computer is doing the exact same thing the other one was

      Don't write much PHP, eh?

    56. Re:A proposition by V!NCENT · · Score: 1

      Bigger than sudo fsck me?

      You're running Windows, aren't you?

      --
      Here be signatures
    57. Re:A proposition by V!NCENT · · Score: 1

      Yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah bla bla bla bla.

      Man != woman
      Woman != man

      Stop playing the feminine card, please?

      --
      Here be signatures
    58. Re:A proposition by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      If only this program will fork!

    59. Re:A proposition by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I'm going to bookmark your comment man !

    60. Re:A proposition by ooshna · · Score: 1

      Yeah but that would require years of learning the system then of course there is the hardware incompatibility plus she would be built to be tinkered with not for fun so say goodbye to all the good games you could have played with her. plus there already is a way to get great eye candy on a woman its called plastic surgery.

    61. Re:A proposition by ooshna · · Score: 1

      Marijuana providing funny stories of stupid things since 1960

    62. Re:A proposition by arth1 · · Score: 1

      And think of all the viruses you could get from her! Hmm....I think I'll get a model where all the hardware is Linux or *BSD compatible.

      She'll never go down on you...

    63. Re:A proposition by arth1 · · Score: 1

      Oh, I think there's a great difference in the quality of terminals. How do they behave if you log in from somwhere with ISO-8859-1 to somewhere with UTF-8, for example? And how big and fast are the scroll buffers? Will it subject you to unreadable dark-blue-on-black text, or can you choose an enhanced colour set replacement that is readable? Can you search scroll buffers? Or save them? Are full VT emulations supported? Does it behave well when hooked up to a serial? Which might be 9600-E-7-1? Does CTRL-S use flow control if the remote supports it? How about RS232C, and RTS/DSR instead of RTS/CTS? Or TEK support? 3270 and 5250 perhaps? Shortcut keys for scripting language snippets? Or non-English language support? How quickly can you restore a sane UI if you cat a binary by mistake? Can you move the scroll bar from left to right? Does it support historically correct X mouse behaviour (focus-follows-mouse where clicking a border brings it to the foreground while clicking a window does not)? Can you choose whether it auto-adjust font sizes or not if you increase the window size? How about window splitting? Or transparency?

      The quality of the UI of terminals differs widely between choices like the kraptacular konsole and lobotomized gnome-terminal, Windows choices like Tera Term, Glink and ProComm, and WM-agnostic choices like xterm and rxvt.

    64. Re:A proposition by mcgrew · · Score: 1

      If you're lying to your wife (not little white lies like "no, honey, your ass isn't big" but lies like "I have to work overtime" when you're really at the bar), your marriage is doomed.

      More on-topic, this anthropomorphism is something I've been futily warning about for thirty years. people believe their computers think. Even back when a mainframe was less powerful than a musical Hallmark card they called them "thinking machines."

      Are you ready for the "machine rights" movement, similar to the animal rights movement? If we don't nip it in the bud now, it will happen.

      Machines can't think, people, and they never will unless a chemistry-based computer is invented. A database is no more knowledgeable than a book; it's just easier to access the information. Your computer is just a sophisticated abacus, and nothing more. How many beads do I have to put on my abacus to make it sentient? Anybody who knows how electricity and logic gates works is aware of this, but it's disheartning to see slashdotters (and it looks like it's most of you from previous conversations here) believe computers will or can think.

      PLEASE read the wikipedia article on anthropomorphism; that's what this is all about.

    65. Re:A proposition by mcgrew · · Score: 1

      I see you haven't run Linux in YEARS. Try it again, I like Mandriva's interface far more than Windows', and I'm even starting to like Windows 7.

      Well, I was until last night whe I downloaded patches and the damned thing rebooted without asking. You call that a good interface? I don't. The damned computer shouldn't do anything I don't specifically tell it to.

      Actually, having a woman who would do what I told her without backtalk would be pretty cool... come to think of it, Windows' interfacs IS like a woman. I just hate it when I hover the mouse over the "all programs" part of the start menu and it acts like I clicked. Who in the hell thought of THAT? I bet it was a woman.

    66. Re:A proposition by Thiez · · Score: 1

      In soviet anthropomorphia, wikipedia reads you!

      > Machines can't think, people, and they never will unless a chemistry-based computer is invented.

      Why do you think only chemicals can think? Wouldn't a computer running a simulation of a biological brain be indistinguishable from the 'real thing'?

      > How many beads do I have to put on my abacus to make it sentient?

      How many dumb neurons do I have to put in a jar to make them sentient?

    67. Re:A proposition by sorak · · Score: 1

      I propose forcing women to think like computers instead of like women. They would be much easier to interact with.

      What? are you crazy? that would be horrible....Just imagine trying to have a conversation with a woman who continually pauses, buffers, and freezes as she is talking to you... ...damn, that actually sounds pretty awesome!

      No, it would be like dating William Shatner.

    68. Re:A proposition by mcgrew · · Score: 1

      In what universe?

    69. Re:A proposition by AltairDusk · · Score: 1

      or paint with your menstrual blood...

      Wow... you might want to seek professional help.

    70. Re:A proposition by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Wow, dude. I can't imagine why you have such problems with women.

    71. Re:A proposition by Aeros · · Score: 1

      But what happens when some dumb lab assistant working late at night at a research facility accidentally knocks over a bottle of human brain juice into a computer? Of course you know whats going to happen...we've seen all the crappy movies. But this is something we need to be afraid of!

    72. Re:A proposition by mcgrew · · Score: 1

      If a woman had commented "I propose forcing men to think like computers instead of like men. They would be much easier to interact with" would you have posted about how mysandrist it was? I would have still found it humorous. Which brings up another old joke:

      Q: How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

      A: THAT'S NOT FUNNY, ASSHOLE!!!!!

      Lighten up, lady. It's a JOKE. Get over yourself and find a sense of humor.

    73. Re:A proposition by brainscauseminds · · Score: 1

      Machines can't think, people, and they never will unless a chemistry-based computer is invented.

      I'm not sure you need brains to cause minds. Although the processes in our minds are complex, they can be described algorithmically or be simulated by artificial neural networks, although in a limited way at the present time.

    74. Re:A proposition by mcgrew · · Score: 1

      I'm not sure you need brains to cause minds.

      No, you don't. Amoebas don't have brains, yet they can go after food and show other indications of thought.

      Although the processes in our minds are complex, they can be described algorithmically or be simulated by artificial neural networks

      You can simulate an atomic explosion, but no radiation is produced. You can simulate a race car, but no movement is produced. You can simulate a brain, but no thought is produced.

      Thoughts and feelings are nothing more than complex chemical reactions. I wish you guys would study logic gates and the circutry behind them. I like science fiction as much as anybody; I, Robot and The Rest of the Robots are good reads, Data is one of my favorite Star Trek characters, and I like CP30, but they're no more real than Buck Rogers. It's fantasy. Thought is chemical, not electronic.

    75. Re:A proposition by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      But then you're stuck with a rather crappy UI, and who wants that on a woman...

      Oh you run Windows 7. Yes it is a rather crappy UI.

    76. Re:A proposition by pnutjam · · Score: 1

      My Dunlap Syndrome is in remission.

    77. Re:A proposition by amicusNYCL · · Score: 1

      Sorry guys, it's my fault that more women aren't here. My bad. I didn't realize I had such an effect on humorless women.

      --
      "Our two-party system is like a bowl of shit looking at itself in a mirror." - Lewis Black
    78. Re:A proposition by sesshomaru · · Score: 1
      --
      "MIT betrayed all of its basic principles."
    79. Re:A proposition by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Sure, but bluescreening in the middle of a blowjob would be more than a little annoying...

      How do you propose avoiding having them go down while going down?

    80. Re:A proposition by sesshomaru · · Score: 1

      Well, I disagree on two levels. This isn't anthropomorphism (this thing is a man) but animism (this thing is alive). It happens on a subconscious level, we start to treat complex machines as if they were creatures even if we consciously know better. Most people have done the same things with their cars, "Start you #$@#@!"

      I'm not too worried about a Machine Rights movement, the Animal Rights movement has basically accomplished nothing. Human treatment of lesser creatures is more vile and disgusting today than it was back when the Romans were crucifying dogs to celebrate holidays. This is despite the fact that animals, at least, are cute, warm and furry. Try selling that with a sewage pump or a toaster, no matter how smart it is.

      I also don't agree that machines will never think, although I think the first thinking machines will cheat and be cyborgs with animal brains running the machinery. I think a fully artificial, thinking creature would be possible because thinking creatures are possible. That doesn't mean it wouldn't be radically different than our modern computers, I'm sure it would.

      --
      "MIT betrayed all of its basic principles."
    81. Re:A proposition by mcgrew · · Score: 1

      This isn't anthropomorphism (this thing is a man) but animism (this thing is alive).

      It seems to me that it's both.

      I think the first thinking machines will cheat and be cyborgs with animal brains running the machinery.

      Well, that would indeed be a thinking machine. There are lots of human cyborgs now -- people with artificial joints, pacemakers, all sorts of implanted devices that aid their health or function. Hell, the accomodating lens in my left eye makes me one; I'm part machine. I know a woman with both hips, knees, and shoulders replaced by devices. Pound for pound she's probably almost as much machine as human.

      That doesn't mean it wouldn't be radically different than our modern computers, I'm sure it would.

      Well, if they invent a computer that uses chemistry instead of electronics, THAT may produce real thought, but people actually believe electronic computers do or will think.

    82. Re:A proposition by SCPRedMage · · Score: 1

      Strangely, no drugs were involved in that story...

      --
      My sig can beat up your sig.
    83. Re:A proposition by morgaen · · Score: 1

      Mmmh.. Plug and play!

    84. Re:A proposition by Shadow+of+Eternity · · Score: 1

      In the universe where if you get someone drunk and screw them while they're passed out, although some places just place that under regular rape laws instead of filing it under statutory rape laws with the same punishments as the normal ones.

      --
      A bullet may have your name on it but splash damage is addressed "To whom it may concern."
    85. Re:A proposition by ooshna · · Score: 1

      I would have claimed to be high just to save face.

    86. Re:A proposition by Eivind · · Score: 1

      It's not that it's nessecarily particularily misogynistic. It's just that whenever women are mentioned, in any way shape or form here on slashdot, you always gets the same (or variations of the same) tired old stupid "jokes".

      In the real world, the average slashdotter is not 17. not a virgin. and not devoid of female friends. For that matter, I bet there's more married guys than there's virgins.

      You'll get no arguments with me for stating that -humans- are different from -computers-, I do suggest this is pretty much equally true for both sexes though. Guys "apparently similar" to me appreciate talking sports, visiting Hooters and, for that matter, love blowjobs.

    87. Re:A proposition by SCPRedMage · · Score: 1

      Ah, but where's the fun in that?

      Truth be told, the keys simply ended up falling in the bag, and I failed to notice when I put the left-overs in the fridge.

      --
      My sig can beat up your sig.
    88. Re:A proposition by mcgrew · · Score: 1

      Well, passed out is a bit different than drunk. If she's simply drunk, her inhibitions are lowered and you've got a better chance of her saying "yes". And you're likely to be as drunk as her; you might not be to obliging to her were you a bit more sober.

      If she's passed out, it IS rape.

    89. Re:A proposition by Requiem18th · · Score: 1

      No idiot, thought isn't chemical, people are chemical, thought is something people do, a process.

      You are confusing an activity with the object that performs it.

      It's like saying a robot can't dance because --for humans-- the statement "Dance and movements are nothing more than complex chemical reactions." is true.

      --
      But... the future refused to change.
    90. Re:A proposition by Shadow+of+Eternity · · Score: 1

      Which is basically what I was trying to get at from post #1 while keeping the joke running.

      --
      A bullet may have your name on it but splash damage is addressed "To whom it may concern."
    91. Re:A proposition by kdemetter · · Score: 1

      the Animal Rights movement has basically accomplished nothing

      Your comment shows you know nothing about animal rights movements.
      Their work has been immeasurably valuable , both in actively stopping animal cruelty , and preventing it .

      I hope they never read your comment , because we need people like them ( it's not like you are going to do anything about animal cruelty right , better to have someone else do it for you ).

    92. Re:A proposition by mcgrew · · Score: 1

      But dance isn't "nothing more than complex chemical reactions" even though muscle movement is. Thought is. Read up on how the brain works some time -- wikipedia and Google are your friends, as is your local public library.

    93. Re:A proposition by Walter+Carver · · Score: 1

      It's not women that do this. All people do this.

      I find it interesting. If I knew the output it would be boring.

    94. Re:A proposition by Requiem18th · · Score: 1

      How can you tell that dance isn't just a chemical reaction? Or rather who gave you the power to decide that it isn't the same?

      Of course I can tell the difference between an activity an the subject tht performs it.

      For the same reason I can tell that thought is not merely a bunch of proteins and neurochemicals, thought is the activity that those proteins and chemicals do, and like dance, there is nothing stopping an electronic brain from performing the same activity.

      And no, you cannot just tell me that this time, the subject and the activity are the same, at least not without some sort of proof.

      You are like an ancient Egyptian who insists my digital wristwatch is not a clock because a clock is sand dripping between two pieces of glass.

      I don't need to reach for google or wikipedia to know that, in the human brain, thought is the result of a chemical reaction, I also don't need them to know that in my grandfather's clock time keeping was performed by a set of metal gears.

      What you have just merely asserted so far without any proof is that thought is more than just the activity in the brain.

      --
      But... the future refused to change.
  2. Of course we like our computers by Locke2005 · · Score: 5, Funny

    They bring us free porn on a daily basis!

    --
    I've abandoned my search for truth; now I'm just looking for some useful delusions.
    1. Re:Of course we like our computers by derGoldstein · · Score: 1

      But a noob would only get crappy, low-res, old porn. If you want the good stuff you have to know what you're doing. Same with women.

      --
      Entomologically speaking, the spider is not a bug, it's a feature.
    2. Re:Of course we like our computers by camperslo · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Be careful with those warm, fuzzy computer moments. The oxytocin that triggers may make you trust them too much. Think of it as a new sort of user vulnerability.

  3. Like I needed to know. by Idbar · · Score: 5, Funny

    Like I needed to know how to improve my relationship with machines. What I need is a map to get out of the basement and interact with real people!

    1. Re:Like I needed to know. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      1- Start doing some exercise (Say running instead of crawling to the refrigerator)
      2- Now you can jog for a few minutes a day(You don't need to go outside just)
      3- Start spending every weekend climbing some mountain
      (By this point you are only ugly at worst, it is okay)
      4- Do some muscular training (Women dig muscle even on an ugly man - just don't overdo it and become some muscle champion, women don't like small dicks)
      5- Get or change job to one that lists female employees (We can't hope to get you into a bar successfully yet)
      6- Force yourself to talk to the female employees (Start from the ugly ones just so you remember you don't want to fall for a coworker, they are only the last option if you can't succeed otherwise, the friend zone is your friend. And at this point you are likely to bring sexual harassment charges to yourself.)
      (By now you should understand women a bit better)
      7- Meet some woman you aren't going to see again (Say a fellow mountain climber) Talk her into a dinner.
      8- After she has declined your advancements note at which point it happened and try to fix what you think might have failed. Remember to use what you learned of women thought from your coworkers, what kind of hair or dressing fits you better and the like.
      (Volume is important to account for standard deviation, be sure to use equivalent lines for every single woman you meet. If every single woman dumps you before starting you have probably missed something in the previous steps.)
      9- IF NOT DINNER GOTO 7
      10 - "Damn it worked! It has never worked before! What am I supposed to do?" Nothing. Just talk to her and follow a similar debugging process. Here the goal isn't sleeping with her(That would be an advanced student bonus) you want her to repeat the meetings while knowing you are romantically interested in her. If you are put into the friend zone don't dump her, use as woman thought database material.
      11 - UNTIL KISS GOTO 7 (Sorry)
      12 - (Now you are pretty close, assuming you didn't force it, if you did you might be close anyways) Tell her you think you might feel romantically inclined towards her. Try to repeat the kissing experience as many times as possible. Then use as many low(but legal) tricks as you can(wine, long late dinners, I missed the last train) to run the final mile. Women can smell your insecurity long after they are into you. It is a lot easier to nail them when one is not an insecure nerd. Remember to bring condoms but not the whole box and if you think you might come in milliseconds that first time practice self-control techniques at home. Also practice for the opposite situation or at least fake an orgasm after about 30 minutes since penetration. Women aren't as tight as hands. Don't try anything but missionary position until the second sex date and don't ever cum on eyes tits mouth unless she asks you to or you are sure apologies will work.
      13 - It's not the end, you might break up with her, don't despair, troubleshoot repeat and rinse. You should have a lot more self esteem after sex with a woman who wasn't a sex worker.
      14 - ???
      15 - Profit

    2. Re:Like I needed to know. by ben_kelley · · Score: 1

      Wait! Computers can help with that. All you need is a copy of Google Maps: Home.

    3. Re:Like I needed to know. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      A mmap?

    4. Re:Like I needed to know. by dov_0 · · Score: 1

      I don't think that many people will actually interact relationally with their machines though. They interact with characters in games, yes. With people on the internet, yes. Not the machine itself. They will optomise setting for programs which have been 'useful', not 'helpful'. The computer is only a very useful and engaging, but essentially dumb and dead tool.

      --
      sudo mount --milk --sugar /cup/tea /mouth /etc/init.d/relax start
    5. Re:Like I needed to know. by icebraining · · Score: 5, Funny

      Pff, I'm not taking advice from some noob who uses GOTO.

    6. Re:Like I needed to know. by camperslo · · Score: 1

      What I need is a map to get out of the basement and interact with real people!

      Still, when you get out you'll remember all those things you read online on how to treat people.

    7. Re:Like I needed to know. by martin-boundary · · Score: 2, Funny

      I tried leaving the basement once, but there was a Grue on the other side of the door. Apparently, the map I downloaded was from an old teletype machine.

    8. Re:Like I needed to know. by eamonman · · Score: 5, Funny

      But he was giving you basic advice

      --
      0- Eamonman Proud member of DNRC
    9. Re:Like I needed to know. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Informative

      Warning: Infinite Loop Detected: Steps 7 - 9

    10. Re:Like I needed to know. by macbuzz01 · · Score: 1

      I'm going to need some visual basic or it didn't happen. You down with OOP or was it opp....

    11. Re:Like I needed to know. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      4- Do some muscular training (Women dig muscle even on an ugly man - just don't overdo it and become some muscle champion, women don't like small dicks)

      I'm not a muscle champion and I still have a small dick. What am I supposed to do about that?

    12. Re:Like I needed to know. by Alexandra+Erenhart · · Score: 1

      Don't. Last Sat I actually went out to ride my bike along the river walk and I got like 7 mosquito bites on my arms, and I'm kind of sensitive with these texan mosquitoes. Now I have big itchy bumps. I might not be used to their bite because that never happened when I lived in Chile.

      Lesson: Don't go out. At least not near river banks ;)

    13. Re:Like I needed to know. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      What, you expected a "while-do" loop? Animal.

    14. Re:Like I needed to know. by oljanx · · Score: 1

      I followed that map once. It lead me out of the basement, into a fabulous relationship. Through childbirth, into a mortgage, and right back into the basement.

    15. Re:Like I needed to know. by oljanx · · Score: 1

      A tip of the hat to you sir. Now someone go ahead and mod this redundant. It was worth it.

    16. Re:Like I needed to know. by AlamedaStone · · Score: 2, Funny

      4- Do some muscular training (Women dig muscle even on an ugly man - just don't overdo it and become some muscle champion, women don't like small dicks)

      I'm not a muscle champion and I still have a small dick. What am I supposed to do about that?

      Buy tiny furniture.

      --
      "All these years believing you're the signified monkey, only to find out you're just a big hunk of nobody cares."
    17. Re:Like I needed to know. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      You still have hands and a tongue. You don't need a big penis to be a great lover. And if you are a great lover: your penis size is no longer important.

    18. Re:Like I needed to know. by mcgrew · · Score: 1

      If you're talking about the basement room with a blue ceiling and a fusion lamp, relatively few of us have gone upstairs.

    19. Re:Like I needed to know. by mcgrew · · Score: 1

      At the risk of a "troll" mod (some people have NO sense of humor), A Nerd's Guide to Getting Laid

    20. Re:Like I needed to know. by GameboyRMH · · Score: 2, Funny

      Can't run the program, system requirements are too high, crashes on launch. Can you write a more lightweight version?

      --
      "When information is power, privacy is freedom" - Jah-Wren Ryel
    21. Re:Like I needed to know. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      try with google streetview first. they world may have changed and you dont want to get confused after a few steps outside

  4. I don't know how to maturely discuss this. by Spazntwich · · Score: 3, Funny

    Guess this lowers the theoretical barriers to the sexbot market.

    We'll see robot girlfriends purposefully installing Microsoft software for the plausible deniability upon contracting a virus.

    Wish I could quarantine my W32.Herpes/Worm. :'(

    1. Re:I don't know how to maturely discuss this. by d3ac0n · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Sexbot? Bah. I'd rather have a Persocom anyday. Not only are they cuter, they will do the laundry and cook.

      --
      Official Heretic from the "Church of Global Warming". Proven right thanks to whistle blowers. AGW = Flat Earth Theory
    2. Re:I don't know how to maturely discuss this. by Spazntwich · · Score: 1

      Depends on where you live I guess. After googling up these persocoms, I wouldn't be surprised if relations with one of those snagged you some nifty puritanical child molestation charges.

    3. Re:I don't know how to maturely discuss this. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Pity about where they placed the power switch though. It would be a much more interesting model if certain functions didn't lead to constant power cycling.

    4. Re:I don't know how to maturely discuss this. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      "Oh baby I'm almost there"
      "Updates have been installed would you like to restart? Automatically restarting in 15 seconds"
      "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"

  5. All I can say is by Locke2005 · · Score: 1

    Clifford, stop being such a Nass!

    --
    I've abandoned my search for truth; now I'm just looking for some useful delusions.
  6. Skinjob by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Mr Nass has shown his hand with such an obvious propoganda piece (which I didn't read - its how i keep my mind free of the effects of such manipulations), clearly he is a cylon.....

  7. I prefer to beat my computers. by scourfish · · Score: 3, Funny

    I'll throw it down a flight of stairs and give them these black and blue smudges on their LCD screens every now and then; but I only do it because I love them, and they have to learn that when I say "bitch, automake me a Makefile," I expect it now and nothing should be reporting to standard error. I'm that machine's user because it wasn't good enough for anybody else.

    1. Re:I prefer to beat my computers. by Peach+Rings · · Score: 2, Funny
  8. Remember that time? by PsyciatricHelp · · Score: 2, Insightful

    And you think they remember past events now. if they were like computers you would have to pray for it to crash. Queue Brand jokes.

  9. Implications for android development... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    If we as a society become more accepting of how we view machines in our daily lives, does that mean that androids will be accepted as part of our daily lives too?

    It seems that it is inevitable for androids to become part of our lives, since we are moving to a world where relationships are so superficial you might as well be dating an android.

    1. Re:Implications for android development... by h4rr4r · · Score: 2, Funny

      Why would it be superficial to date a self-aware non-biological machine?

      Sounds like uppity biological machine talk to me.

    2. Re:Implications for android development... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Androids aren't necessarily self-aware.

    3. Re:Implications for android development... by derGoldstein · · Score: 1

      That depends on who you ask, and how you phrase the question.

      --
      Entomologically speaking, the spider is not a bug, it's a feature.
    4. Re:Implications for android development... by mcgrew · · Score: 1

      If we as a society become more accepting of how we view machines in our daily lives, does that mean that androids will be accepted as part of our daily lives too?

      Why not? All your other machinery is accepted. If you start talking "machine rights" I'm going ballistic, though.

      ...we are moving to a world where relationships are so superficial you might as well be dating an android.

      An android would be way better than some of the women I know.

  10. Why it's not ? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    They are entirely done by human beings from dust and sand...

  11. Not me. by Posting=!Working · · Score: 1

    Most of the time, I want to kick my computer's ass. My laptop has been raised over my head for smashing many times, but fortunately for my wallet, I haven't followed through.

    If it were a woman, it would've been dumped long ago. Probably on the first date.

    If it doesn't involve typing, I actually prefer to use the internet on my phone over the computer. Way less frustrating.

    --
    This sentence no verb.
    1. Re:Not me. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

      I once tossed a desktop in a river. The water was brackish, so it was fresh at times and salt at others. I fished the computer out after a few weeks. After letting it dry, I put it in from of the other computers. I threatened to do the same to the other computers.

      I have not had a problem since with any machine. I am often told that the computer problem just goes away when I go near other people's computers to fix them. I think the computers got the message. Piss me off and I will toss you in the river.

      The question remains: Can we do that to congress and not get jail time?

    2. Re:Not me. by Killjoy_NL · · Score: 2, Interesting

      I work in a school and from many years ago I remember the best (imho) moments.

      1. In a classroom with computers, 1 mouse broke, I nailed it to the wall at the head of the room to show the other mice what I would do to them if they also broke down, for the last 3 years in that classroom no mice broke.

      2. One of the administrative staff was having a problem with her computer, she called me and I came downstairs.
      She showed me what she did and sure enough, the machine gave an error message.

      Me: Ok, do you treat the computer nice enough?
      Her (confused): What do you mean???!?
      Me: Oh, just the little things, an encouraging word, a caress on its case, you know.
      Her (angry): I never heard of such a thing, that thing is a machine, it doesn't have feelings!!
      Me: Oh no? Let me show you (as I slowly caress its case), there there, she is not such a bad person, you can trust her, won't you work for her like you work for me hmmmm??

      After that, I repeated the same actions in the software as she did 100%, but I did not get the error message.
      She was REALLY confused, but saw that my method of working with computers worked better than hers and I cannot count the times I walk into an office and the problem disappears.

      So you see, sometimes the stick, sometimes the carrot.

      --
      This is the sig that says NI (again)
    3. Re:Not me. by Jedi+Alec · · Score: 1

      Quite frankly, that sound like a pile of bonkers...and I have exactly the same experiences ;-)

      Sometimes when you need some file read bad, the poor thing is already swapping like crazy and then at noon the ridiculous automated antivirus scan kicks sucking down what remains of the cpu...she needs a little hug and words of encouragement in a world of abusive sysadmins.

      She also likes having her keyboard cleaned for some reason...

      --

      People replying to my sig annoy me. That's why I change it all the time.
    4. Re:Not me. by Killjoy_NL · · Score: 1

      I know how it sounds and the only explanation I can think of is that my timing of keypresses was better than hers, allowing the software to finish its process before having to start a new one.
      But I never tell my users that ;)

      --
      This is the sig that says NI (again)
  12. More willing to "help"? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Insightful

    I'd say if the "program wasn't helpful", people wouldn't want to waste their time "optimizing" a lousy computer/OS. Much like they don't want to polish a turd.

  13. Sounds right to me by Beerdood · · Score: 2, Interesting

    I'd say the opposite is true as well - when your computer isn't being helpful you'd also treat it more like an annoying person. When a certain paperclip showed up on a certain program, I'd say out loud "Oh would you FUCK OFF already!!?!".

    --
    Global warming and other natural disasters are a direct effect of the shrinking number of pirates - Gospel of the FSM
  14. mod parent up by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    +1, Uncomfortable Truth

  15. I see you're trying to ... by jstockdale · · Score: 1

    ... extrapolate social interactions onto non-sentient objects. Would you like me to:

    1) Find some friends for you on facebook?
    2) Order you some books on interpersonal relationships from Amazon.com?
    3) Club CN over the head with a baseball bat, so he'll stop trying to shoehorn 'social' interactions into my goddamn UI.

    (And, yes: This is a gross generalization, but not totally untrue.)

    --
    **AA: a bunch of mindless jerks who'll be the first against the wall when the revolution comes
  16. Never anthropomorphize computers ... by Charles+Dodgeson · · Score: 4, Funny

    ... they hate it when you do that.

    --
    Prime numbers are exactly what Alan Greenspan says they are -S. Minsky
    1. Re:Never anthropomorphize computers ... by derGoldstein · · Score: 1

      ...ditto for women.

      --
      Entomologically speaking, the spider is not a bug, it's a feature.
    2. Re:Never anthropomorphize computers ... by GrumblyStuff · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Nah, what they hate and what they like alternates in a completely random fashion.

      Except for clothes shopping. They may say they hate it but that doesn't stop them from inspecting every garment in the store.

  17. HELP COMPUTER! by Push+Latency · · Score: 0

    Stop all the downloadin'!
    #15!

  18. Cars and boats? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Informative

    people often name a ship or classic car. And insist that it has a personality of its own, and that it must be treated with respect. A computer is even more interactive than a ship, so it seems like it might be even easier to anthropomorphize a computer.

    1. Re:Cars and boats? by derGoldstein · · Score: 1

      But cars and boats are often referred to as a "she". Now that I think about it, I know a few people who give their computers female names, but most (guys) name their computers macho names like "TeraFrag" or "The Obliterator". They see computers more like weapons than people.

      --
      Entomologically speaking, the spider is not a bug, it's a feature.
    2. Re:Cars and boats? by HybridST · · Score: 1

      I have two old(6+ years!) dell laptops-Squishy is a decent p4 *who* can crunch polygons or apply an ambient reverb track to a mix and be happy as long as i keep her video fins clean. Sparky is an unstable bitch with an annoying temperment-dns fails after several hours of perfect connection and i get to restart dns from cmd or disable/enable whichever network device is being used. That's on a good day... *She* has a few other tricks up *her* sleeve too but i keep *her* running for my day-to-day browing. Sparky's never been stable enough for decent audio work unfortunately...

      My nix server is Svirfneblin and DSL keeps chugging away happily... That one's a dude!

      --
      Ever notice that Cobra Commander sounds an awful lot like Star scream?
    3. Re:Cars and boats? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I give all of my computers female names. I treat them nicely, and they work well with me. Now if only I could get real females to realize that pushing their buttons is my way of letting them know I like them.

    4. Re:Cars and boats? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      My girlfriend *is* a weapon, though! Unfortunately, I seem to be pretty goddamn suicidal with that weapon when I get frustrated...

    5. Re:Cars and boats? by mcgrew · · Score: 1

      Computers have been "he" pretty much since there have been computers, just like cars and boats are "she". I'm guessing that computers are "he" because of Grace Hopper?

  19. Windows? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Could that be why Windows is the most installed OS?

  20. Some people must be SICK! by thatkid_2002 · · Score: 2, Interesting

    So if people think of their computers as people why do they not care about their computers getting viruses? Some people are ignorant, some are lazy and don't care that their computer/friend has a virus. Some think that it is not their problem! There is clearly a type of person in our society who receive minimal respect for the work they do - in fact they are treated worse than animals!

    People who go around giving STDs to people knowingly are prosecuted - why not people who do the same with computers?

    Why would you care about your pet or your friend getting sick and not your computer?

    As you can see, I respect my follow peoples. (Even if I don't like them... damn Windows people).

    1. Re:Some people must be SICK! by aiht · · Score: 1

      People who go around giving STDs to people knowingly are prosecuted - why not people who do the same with computers?

      I get that you're (at least partially) joking, but I think you'll find that knowingly going around giving computers viruses is also frowned upon by the law.

    2. Re:Some people must be SICK! by Neil+Boekend · · Score: 1

      [linux_is_perfect_and_window$_sucks_mode]
      Why then is Windows still allowed?
      [/linux_is_perfect_and_window$_sucks_mode]

      --
      Well, I might have a way, but it only works on a semi spherical planet in a vacuum.
    3. Re:Some people must be SICK! by hedwards · · Score: 1

      Eh, to be honest, the research strikes me as being somewhat sketchy. Of course people are more likely to invest time in optimizing a program that's been useful previously. Why on Earth would you waste any time doing that if the application isn't useful. It's not about thinking of it as a person, it's the fact that if the program isn't helpful you've probably got better things to do, like finding an application which does what you need it to do.

  21. Nothing new to me by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Every computer I've ever had seems to have its own personality. Wherever quirks come up, I just usually figure that's part of "who" the computer is rather than something that needs to be ironed out (unless it's a major problem...then that's when I have to give it an attitude readjustment).

    That said, I've started using Windows for the first 17 years of my life then switched to Ubuntu when I got to college...every computer has been different to me, and I find that interesting and exciting. Maybe that's also why I never liked working with Macs much; they feel too sterile and conformist to me.

  22. Maybe by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I help my computer if it has helped me previously because it has potential to help me again? If it never helps me, there's no point in fixing it?

  23. I utterly and completely disagree... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    In ancient times, a man's hoe was his mistress,
    later on, a mans ship was his mistress, and even later a mans horse was his mistress. In the indrustral age, a mans car is his mistress, and in Scotty's time again, a mans ship will be his mistress. But for now, my PC remains the root of all evil, kept at bay, so as no not corrupt my soul. Much akin to the relationship between man and machine in the movie "The Gods Must Be Crazy," where he named his Landrover: "Antichrist."

  24. Hasn't this been tried before? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Stepford Wives, anyone?

  25. Anthropomorphizing too much? by garompeta · · Score: 1
    Maybe the sociologist was biased? Maybe the proper word wouldn't be "help" it should be "useful".
    I think it is simply too obvious that we would spend time fixing (or nurturing) an application (or relationship) that we believe it worth our time.

    Nothing new here... this is simple economics, but his overwhelming eagerness of proving his point he ended up seeing humans everywhere, in science we call it confirmation bias.

    Hell, if he can write a book with such an idiotic theme, I should start writing my own book.
    (And sometimes we need satires like this one http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cQ7J7UjsRqg to keep reminding us how "science" might be rediscovering obvious and stupid facts...)

  26. Still it's weird by Jeprey · · Score: 1

    I guess some people anthropomorphize machines including computers. I never have and have never understood why it would be necessary or desireable. But I'm an engineer so I understand most machines down to their smallest components.

    1. Re:Still it's weird by niks42 · · Score: 1

      IBM refused to refer to 'memory' in relation to computers; rather they called it storage, to help prevent people from fearing computers and over-anthropomorphising. Mayhap we need to remind people that like Johnny 5, they just run programs.

  27. I do treat my computer like other humans! by Nyder · · Score: 1

    God, I didn't think of it before, but i'm horrible.

    Much like homeless people asking for change, I'll ignore emails.
    Hot Chicks? Can't touch them in person or online.
    Both people and computers make me mad sometimes, enough that I want to hit them, but i don't.
    Human & computer error messages are hard to understand most the time.

    um, i'd write more, but my computer is looking at me funny.

    --
    Be seeing you...
  28. Obligatory by caturday · · Score: 1

    Stop all the downloadin! Help computer!

  29. Hello, Captain Obvious. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    A study has shown that people have a preference for software that is rewarding, fun, and easier to use, and tend to focus more attention to computers that have such software installed.

    Duh.

  30. You're making it too complicated by toadlife · · Score: 1

    Men want sex
    Women want security

    --
    I don't always use unix-like operating systems; but when I do, I prefer FreeBSD.
    1. Re:You're making it too complicated by drinkypoo · · Score: 1

      Men want sex
      Women want security

      Surveys indicate that women cheat more than men. What women want varies from woman to woman but in general I do not think security is the alpha and omega.

      --
      "You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
    2. Re:You're making it too complicated by TempeTerra · · Score: 1

      Women want security, but they want a stud to father a child. No reason not to have both...

      --
      .evom ton seod gis eht
    3. Re:You're making it too complicated by amicusNYCL · · Score: 1

      Women want security, but they want a stud to father a child. No reason not to have both...

      So what's the deal with women chasing and dating guys who look really great and are both dumb as a stump and incapable of holding a decent job? There's no security there and you can't really say much for how smart the kid would turn out either. Looking at the type of people having children vs. the type of people who aren't, am I the only one thinking that as a society we're devolving?

      --
      "Our two-party system is like a bowl of shit looking at itself in a mirror." - Lewis Black
  31. Another proposition by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Nass has recently published the book The Man Who Lied to His Laptop, in which he 'uses our interactions with machines to investigate how human relationships could be improved.'

    I propose forcing women to think like computers instead of like women. They would be much easier to interact with.

    I propose forcing men to actually think before they post boring comments adhering from outdated views upon half of the human race.

    Then we might be able to improve human relations.

  32. Thanking a computer ? by SomethingOrOther · · Score: 1

    people think of their computers as something like human beings.

    Perhaps these are the same people who say 'thankyou' to automatic doors?

    --
    Anyone quoted by a reporter knows how little they understand
    Don't believe what you read is the truth.
    1. Re:Thanking a computer ? by mcgrew · · Score: 1

      "Hate 'em." -- Marvin on the Heart of Gold PPP doors

      Spaceballs spaceship self destruct system: "Have a nice day!"
      Spaceballs who can't get out: "Thank you!"

  33. And I thought by ZeroExistenZ · · Score: 1

    It was just a feedback-loop where after pushing some buttons you receive a (audio)visual/sensory reward or result for pushing the buttons in a certain sequence.

    As a programmer, you are paid to generate a certain audiovisual result for someone who has learned to ask other people to learn to push the buttons in the right sequence to come to the sensory result (s)he desires.

    --
    I think we can keep recursing like this until someone returns 1
  34. Oh please, please... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Somebody please, please tell me I'm not the only one who jumped to "Kicking Nass and Taking Manes. WTB Life.

  35. How old is this news? by nukenerd · · Score: 1

    From TFA :-

    Participants in one experiment interacted with a program that said something like "Most PCs these days have at 2MB of memory. Being an older model I only have 1MB. What do you feel inadequate about?"

    My emphasis. How old is this news exactly?

    1. Re:How old is this news? by mcgrew · · Score: 1

      They've known about anthropomorphism for a LONG time. You never cursed your car and called it names when it wouldn't start? This is the same thing.

  36. All has to do with by kilodelta · · Score: 1

    A little think called agency. We assign human like qualities to inanimate or even animate creatures. It's pretty much how wolves were domesticated.