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NASA Shoots Down Comet Elenin Doomsday Predictions
coondoggie writes "The comet Elenin, which will pass by Earth October 16, has generated such an inordinate amount of doomsday reports from a number of different sources that NASA today issued a release meant to address a variety of them. To address the myriad concerns, NASA said its scientists compiled a list of the most popular questions it has received about Elenin."
They shot down a comet?! With what, lasers or nukes? (I didn't bother to RTFS)
Bruce Willis and the space shuttle would save us from any comet threat. What's that you say? The shuttle's been retired? Great, we're fucked.
So much for getting out of my student loans!
Maybe an asteroid will hit next year? Or the plague?
... as if there were no threat from a comet named "eLenin"!
-- Real Stupidity is the Artificial Intelligence of the 21st century
Otherwise why would they go at such length to debunk?
It cannot block Sun at this distance, so tt must be the brown dwarf...
I do not believe in karma. "Funny"=-6. Do good and forbid evil. Yours, Oft-Offtopic Flamebaiting Troll.
http://www.nasa.gov/topics/solarsystem/features/comet_elenin.html
networkworld.com seems overloaded, and I probably don't want to see their ads anyway
Sir Humphrey Appleby, "Yes Minister".
And when the Comet lands on their little pointy heads, WHAT THEN? I'll tell you - they'll be crawling to my crib begging, yes BEGGING to be my slave or minion as I will have all the food and bullets in my comfy Undisclosed Location. And then I will rule - yes RULE the world - MUUahahahaaaaaaa! So line up now, peons - the good minion jobs go fast. NEXT!
Shoes for Industry. Shoes for the Dead.
I may have missed it, but the original article is here
I know the truth! That comet's been to Yuggoth, and the Mi-Go are PISSED that we told them their planet isn't a planet anymore. Expect a full fungal invasion! Ia! Ia!
Don't believe what NASA says, if the doomsday reports weren't true I wouldn't have maxed out my ten newly acquired credit cards and re-mortgaged my house five times to spend all in Vegas.
"It will have an immeasurably miniscule influence on our planet. By comparison, my subcompact automobile exerts a greater influence on the ocean's tides than comet Elenin ever will."
They want their movie idea back.
-www.awkwardengineer.com
is lying so you can all sleep well at night, who needs comets when you have fission and fusion bombs?
http://www.ebiblefellowship.com/outreach/tracts/may21/
It's not may 21st anymore, it's October 21st. That's a little too close for coincidence I think. /afk: going to go sell all my possessions, tell my kids they are going to hell, go on a massive road trip with stinky men in weird tshirts. Maybe I'll wear my tinfoil hat while I'm at it, who knows.
Mod me down with all of your hatred and your journey towards the dark side will be complete!
Why worry about something you have no control over and that only happens once every 1,000 centuries?
Weird, never heard of Elenin until this article showed up. How do these doomsday scenarios appear? Do people just come up with a story after a bad trip?
I rarely respond to comments. Also, don't ask for clarifications: a brain and Google are faster, believe me!
These doomsday enthusiasts must be really bored or unhappy people. It seems they get really excited about the prospect of something bringing about an end to their lives. Or they see it as a super-dramatic test where they can prove themselves worthy by surviving it.
Perhaps they should join the armed forces?
The actual FAQ from NASA was posted two weeks ago. Nice of someone to link to it.
And there is no such thing as a black dwarf
That's racist!
I love the "If it's not a big deal deal then why aren't you talking about it?" section. I can see the poor scientist dying a little inside.
It've been cooler if they had actually shot down the comet.
it's a telling comment on the horrible shape of our educational system that NASA has to explain there is no such thing as a black dwarf, and other misconceptions.
Then I thought, more hopefully, that if there are so many people who have so much time and consternation to devote to the possibility of a 3-day comet eclipse, such that NASA has to officially respond, then things overall are probably not that bad.
Great answer (emphasis mine):
Can [Comet Elenin] influence us from where it is, or where it will be in the future? Can this celestial object cause shifting of the tides or even tectonic plates here on Earth?
Oh, those wacky people at JPL. Always finding new ways to make Joe Average understand science.
Yeah yeah yadi yada!! Of course now NASA is coming to shoot down the ridiculously obvious and make the whole thing seem ridiculous. I bet the doomsayers are same as the debunkers.
The submitting author's UID is coondoggie. The article's stated author is Michael Cooney. Perhaps we can have conflict-of-interest information more explicit, Taco, please?
Put my fist through my alarm clock with its ding-dong death inside my ear. - The Blackjacks.
It's an alien space craft, make sure you have your Nike's on.
We didn't have to shoot down comets , they crashed of their own accord.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/De_Havilland_Comet
In (pre soviet) Russia, Comet shoots down YOU!
Q: When performing your analysis, did you use, feet, meters, or furlongs?
NASA: Er, em. Let us get back to you about that comet missing the earth issue.
Have gnu, will travel.
NASA Shoots Down Comet Elenin, Doomsday!
tldr;
the preceding comment is my own and in no way reflects the opinion of the Joint Chiefs of Staff
artical title, because we are morons! The whole lot of us!
Nasa, utilizing the arsenal of resources at it's diposal has successfully and completely shot down, obliterated, and vaporized any and all rements of the fast approaching Doomsday Comet Elenin Predictions
They really have no idea how the mind of a conspiracy theorist works. Denying it in this fashion will only prove it to be true.
Seven puppies were harmed during the making of this post.
From TFA, quoting Don Yeomans, a scientist at NASA JPL:
"So you've got a modest-sized icy dirtball that is getting no closer than 35 million kilometers [about 22 million miles)," said Yeomans. "It will have an immeasurably miniscule influence on our planet. By comparison, my subcompact automobile exerts a greater influence on the ocean's tides than comet Elenin ever will."
ZOMG! That damn scientist's car is changing the earth's tides, and the bastard admits it!
The enemies of Democracy are
>> I knew Trent Reznor was wrapped up in this Doomsday thing.
Yes, this Mr Self Destruct has seen the earth is ripe with decay of sin. Hurt, he gave up on the terrible lie. The mark has been made upon this heresy and the big man with a gun will lead a march of the pigs into a warm place. This ruiner will burn the last wish. And underneath ti all, in the great below, we will find our happiness in slavery. ... I could keep going, but I think you get it. Hell, you write a apocalyptic movie just out of The Fragile titles.
>> And maybe Quake-related weaponry.
Yes, definitely that. The apocalypse will have a kick ass soundtrack and add the ability to jump.
Atlas Shrugged : Thematic Story
"You can't reason somebody out of something they did not rationaly reason themselves in" is an adage I found mostly true. All those elenin-doomsday comet people have not a frigging clue what they are speaking about, making up neutron star and whatnot. This might be an interresting FAQ for the "undecided" (the one which stumbled upon those doomsday stuff and want to check if it is true) but this will be utterly lost on the "woo" which made up their mind and made up whatever magical explanation without even any knowledge on the subject.
C. Sagan : A demon haunted world:
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0345409469/
visit randi.org
TO: Whomever ....if Comet ELENIN is not going to be a problem.... ....why isn't JPL updating their data on the tracking of this small object?
RE: Sooooo....
Last Winter and early Spring, JPL provided updated information on the comet at their web-site....
http://ssd.jpl.nasa.gov/sbdb.cgi?sstr=C%2F2010%20X1;orb=1;cad=1 ....on a monthly basis. All well and good.
Then, when Comet ELENIN passed inside of Mars orbit, they began updating the information on what looked like a weekly basis. Again, all well and good.
THEN THEY STOPPED.
I sent them feedback about their 'going quiet'. Two days later, the data was updated.
The data was updated on or about a weekly basis for several weeks. Nothing of 'significance' was reported. A change of closest approach to Earth of a few miles or so.
However, the report from 5 August 2011, indicated a dramatic change in orbital data which brought Comet ELENIN much closer to Earth than any other monthly or weekly change had reported heretofore: 1600 miles closer. Nothing to be 'alarmed' about, but it was an interesting change in orbital data.
That was over a week ago. And there has been no update since then.
Being a retired infantry officer with something in the way of experience in intelligence matters, I'm curious as to why JPL has AGAIN, 'gone quiet'. Especially after such in interesting change in the orbit of the approaching object.
The best way to alleviate any 'concerns', a.k.a., 'paranoia', about Comet ELENIN would be for JPL to be open and honest about it. Going 'quiet' can only be recognized as either (1) equipment failure, (2) incompetence on the part of the staff at JPL...neither of which is a good thing....or (3) something much MUCH worse.
Soooo.... ....which is it?
Regards,
Chuck(le)
[Information is what people need to be prepared.]
The problem with trying to explain these myths is that by doing so you have come to assume they are real. There is only a need to explain a great flood if you assume it ever happened.
It is like Atlantis, you can go to great lengths coming up with an explanation for it and completely fail to question how it comes only one person in history ever wrote about it.
Take this story, some nutters believe there is a brown star (a super gas giant just shy of being big enough to be a sun) to be hiding in our solar system without us knowing about it... compared to that a giant flood with one boat with 2 or more of every animal almost makes sense... until you seen a wooden boat and realise just how small sea going wooden vessels were in far more advanced times. Really, even two elephants would be a LOT of animal on a thousands of year old wooden vessel. ARGH, now I am doing it, trying to make sense of the non-sensible.
MMO Quests are like orgasms:
You may solo them, I prefer them in a group.
A few months ago they were frantically denying existence of such a comet. what happened so that they turned around.
Read radical news here
They don't want there to be a panic while they're quietly moving the very rich and politicians to underground bunkers. Later, after humanity is wiped out, all those rich people and politicians will be the foundation for a new humanity. A better humanity. A humanity unsullied by the tawdry genes of the poor and middle class. A humanity made up entirely of ruling elite. That's what NASA's not telling you!
I'm trying to teach myself to set people on fire with my mind... Is it hot in here?
Will the comet be visible with the naked eye or a small telescope?
Haley and Hale-bob wont be back in my lifetime.
Why that depends on which of the library's dimensions you happen to be using... leaving me wondering how long it would take and African Swallow...
Good choice! For European Swallow you would need to know if it's carrying coconut or not.
In love, war and slashdot discussions, everything is allowed.
....I posted something on this yesterday.
And several minutes later, I couldn't find it.
This must be a 'interesting' system to 'manage'.....
TO: SlashDot
RE: So Much for High Tech @ Slashdot
That's a 'laugh'.
This system is not iPad friendly. I'm in the kitchen preparing a Saturday morning repast and on my iPad here—as opposed to my regular Mac workstation, in my office, upstairs—I can't use your slide bar to expand all comments.
Maybe you guys should come up to the latter part of the first decade of the 21st Century.
Regards,
Chuck(le)
[Life, on the bleeding edge of technology, is always ironic....now and then.]