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Microsoft R&D Burgled: Only Apple Products Stolen

Posted by timothy on from the 'cause-they-had-no-time-'cause-they-were-on-a-clock dept.

Sir Realist writes "Apparently Microsoft's R&D offices in Mountain View were broken into over the holidays: the only things stolen were Apple iPads and the theft has apparently been confirmed from a number of sources."

40 of 141 comments (clear)

  1. Brandnames by arose · · Score: 3, Insightful

    Doesn't that make you feel all better about paying the premium for Tide^H^H^H^HApple?

    --
    Analogies don't equal equalities, they are merely somewhat analogous.
    1. Re:Brandnames by arose · · Score: 3, Informative

      Disregard the crappy generic link, here's the real Tide.

      --
      Analogies don't equal equalities, they are merely somewhat analogous.
    2. Re:Brandnames by dan828 · · Score: 4, Insightful

      And like any thief, these people knew that they'd be able to sell the Apple products for better prices than anything else. Wanting to limit their exposure, and get the most money for their risks, of course they picked the stuff that they could turn over faster and for more money. It doesn't say anything about what stuff is better, just what sells for more.

    3. Re:Brandnames by NatasRevol · · Score: 2

      Yeah, I hate when I keep having to enter my 25 digit license code.

      --
      There are two types of people in the world: Those who crave closure
    4. Re:Brandnames by arob28 · · Score: 5, Funny

      Detergent as currency? This takes money laundering to a whole new level.

    5. Re:Brandnames by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      One of the funniest jokes I ever heard was when the first windows phone came out: They said they hated it so much, they went to a store and left the phone on the passenger seat of their car with the window rolled down. When they came back... there was another windows phone next to it.

    6. Re:Brandnames by Dahamma · · Score: 2

      you DO have to admit that its pretty funny that even a thief wouldn't touch Win 8 or Surface

      That's not true. Identity thieves love Windows.

  2. makes sense by netwarerip · · Score: 5, Funny

    They were likely the only things of value in the building.

    1. Re:makes sense by Sez+Zero · · Score: 5, Funny

      "And nothing of value was lost", said everyone at the Microsoft R&D center.

    2. Re:makes sense by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Seems like the thieves were better judge of value.

    3. Re:makes sense by kelemvor4 · · Score: 5, Insightful

      "And nothing of value was lost", said everyone at the Microsoft R&D center.

      Yep. Regardless of how you feel about one company or another, an unreleased product from company A is almost certainly more valuable than a commonly available product from company B. My suspicion would be that the thieves were probably employees or contractors at the MS site (cleaning or other cheap labor crew or some such) and knew they could get a quick buck for the Apple products. They probably didn't even know what some of the other stuff was. Asserting the apple products were selected because of their superiority is about as silly as the tongue in cheek assertion that Steve Jobs is really responsible for NY Crime rates due to the theft of Apple products.

      Also, if you follow the news here at all you'll see that missing development products from large companies attract great attention from law enforcement. Missing ipads get filed away as a report somewhere and if they happen to catch the guy, then everyone is happy. If not, MS is out, what maybe $2k that they can now write off? What missing ipads don't get are federally funded investigations.

    4. Re:makes sense by Sir_Eptishous · · Score: 2

      bundling thieves

      Is that like stealing someones cable tv but ignoring their 10mbit internet connection?

      --
      We play the game with the bravery of being out of range
    5. Re:makes sense by GreatDrok · · Score: 4, Funny

      '"And nothing of value was lost", said everyone at the Microsoft R&D center.'

      I don't know, the loss of valuable prototype gear is pretty bad. Good job they can just go back to their prototyping organisation (colloquially known as 'Apple Inc') and get some more. Without these important devices, Microsoft wouldn't know what to do next with their production gear.

      --
      "I have the attention span of a strobe lit goldfish, please get to the point quickly!"
    6. Re:makes sense by pionzypher · · Score: 2

      Puppy?

      --
      I'll believe in corporations having personhood when Texas executes one... - advocate_one
    7. Re:makes sense by UnknowingFool · · Score: 3, Insightful

      They were likely the only things of value in the building.

      I would think the research there is valuable. It however isn't easily sold on the street. It's like breaking into a mansion and stealing the silverware and ignoring the priceless art on the walls.

      --
      Well, there's spam egg sausage and spam, that's not got much spam in it.
    8. Re:makes sense by tattood · · Score: 2

      According to my criminal contacts, the average used pc laptop has almost no resale value and isn't worth stealing.

      You mean Eddie Crispo?

      --
      WTB [sig], PST!!!
  3. Slashdot by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

    Yesterday's news tomorrow :P

  4. as much as I'd like to make a joke... by MickyTheIdiot · · Score: 5, Informative

    It was an R&D center for making Apple software, so there probably were no Surface tables around...

    But it would be extremely funny if there were left out in the open for all to see.

    1. Re:as much as I'd like to make a joke... by Cinder6 · · Score: 4, Insightful

      It's entirely possible that a Surface tablet was around to compare/contrast how the software runs on the different platforms.

      --
      If you can't convince them, convict them.
    2. Re:as much as I'd like to make a joke... by tlhIngan · · Score: 4, Informative

      It was an R&D center for making Apple software, so there probably were no Surface tables around...

      But it would be extremely funny if there were left out in the open for all to see.

      Actually, according to the article... Microsoft's phones and tablets were still there. They did find 5 iPads missing, though.

    3. Re:as much as I'd like to make a joke... by girlintraining · · Score: 4, Insightful

      It was an R&D center for making Apple software, so there probably were no Surface tables around...

      Unlikely. Microsoft sports a very aggressive corporate culture where if you don't use Microsoft for everything, you're "not a team player." This is the company that watched its entire mail service (Hotmail) implode because the edict from on high was they had to use IIS exclusively. It simply couldn't handle the load, regardless of the number of servers and load balancers they threw on... with much chagrin they rolled back to Apache. Linux is used on print servers internally to this day, though it's a dirty secret. They may have had iPads there for development work, but you can bet many of those developers also had Surface tablets because they have to develop for those as well.

      Considering how few of them have sold so far, it's safe to say the product launch, er, exploded on the launch pad. But Microsoft, being Microsoft, will still demand their employees use them or else. I'm sure they'd still be demanding their employees avoid ipods and use Zunes, but we all know what happened there. :)

      --
      #fuckbeta #iamslashdot #dicemustdie
    4. Re:as much as I'd like to make a joke... by fuzzyfuzzyfungus · · Score: 4, Insightful

      I wonder if the thieves were at all cautious about stealing MS hardware from MS because of how tightly some tech companies are known to control pre-release or dev versions of hardware?

      Most likely, the fact that it's easier and quicker to flip stolen iDevices for cash was the reason; but I know that I'd be a bit nervous about stealing a contemporary 'appliance' type device in a situation where it might be some kind of specially blessed dev unit. Modern hardware has at least 3-4 globally unique numbers burned in, and tends to call home frequently, and it wouldn't be a big surprise if dev gear(for reasons of loss prevention or UX testing) is stuffed to the gills with analysis and reporting software...

    5. Re:as much as I'd like to make a joke... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Informative

      When Steve Jobs returned to Apple, he discovered that Apple used Windows servers almost exclusively because Apple didn't have great server offerings.

      At some point you either have to make a truly competitive product, or realize you shouldn't be in that market.

      No, Apple used Solaris and IBM AIX. Back then, Microsoft didn't have great server offerings either. (This being Slashdot, lots of people will say it still doesn't.)

    6. Re:as much as I'd like to make a joke... by LordLimecat · · Score: 2

      Linux is used on print servers internally to this day,

      Id be interested to know why that would be a necessity; ive seen Windows servers handling a pretty large number of printers.

    7. Re:as much as I'd like to make a joke... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Interesting

      It was an R&D center for making Apple software, so there probably were no Surface tables around...

      Unlikely. Microsoft sports a very aggressive corporate culture where if you don't use Microsoft for everything, you're "not a team player."

      As an employee, I can tell you that isn't even remotely true. The one and only case where I've heard any pressure happening about use of Microsoft products in field sales and support.

    8. Re:as much as I'd like to make a joke... by shutdown+-p+now · · Score: 2

      Microsoft sports a very aggressive corporate culture where if you don't use Microsoft for everything, you're "not a team player."

      Bullshit. You see iPhones and MacBooks aplenty, and quite a few Android phones as well, by just walking through the corridors of any office building on MS campus.

    9. Re:as much as I'd like to make a joke... by Billly+Gates · · Score: 2

      This is bullshit. Many folks I know personally at Microsoft sport Macbook Pros (running Windows mostly). Not sure about the phone thing, but if it runs Windows, it's definitely kosher.

      *facepalm* *headdesk* *strangles self with mouse cord*

      You know when I was a kid I personified my computer after I learned it has AI. I still think of it as a crude primptive set of conciousness. Forcing Windows on a Mac is like .... like watching an animal being tortured and shriveling in pain.

      I know it is not likely that and is irritational to think that but it feels wrong on so many levels. That or like putting ketchup and how grade $80 steak at Ruths & Christophers.

      --
      http://saveie6.com/
    10. Re:as much as I'd like to make a joke... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Informative

      Before I quit Apple they were migrating most servers to Oracle Linux - at least in my particular area. They had been using AIX for as long as I remember.

    11. Re:as much as I'd like to make a joke... by strikethree · · Score: 2

      Unlikely. Microsoft sports a very aggressive corporate culture where if you don't use Microsoft for everything, you're "not a team player."

      This would be a good idea if Microsoft would listen to the feedback from the employees. Think about how fucked up your processes are when the CEO himself complains and nothing changes: http://blog.seattlepi.com/microsoft/2008/06/24/full-text-an-epic-bill-gates-e-mail-rant/

      Just batshit insane to have a culture of eating their own dog food when they will not listen to their own dogs talking about improvements.

      --
      "Someone needs to talk to the tree of liberty about its ghoulish drinking problem." by ohnocitizen
  5. Onion called, wants their story back by Tablizer · · Score: 5, Funny

    This too closely fits the decades-old stereotype that MS just steals Apple's ideas as their "R&D" M.O.

    --
    Table-ized A.I.
    1. Re:Onion called, wants their story back by Anubis+IV · · Score: 4, Interesting

      The best Onion stories are the ones that have a hint of truth to them. Unfortunately, some end up having a bit too much truth in them and later come to pass.

    2. Re:Onion called, wants their story back by H0p313ss · · Score: 2

      The best Onion stories are the ones that have a hint of truth to them. Unfortunately, some end up having a bit too much truth in them and later come to pass.

      On the economic side, Bush vowed to bring back economic stagnation by implementing substantial tax cuts, which would lead to a recession, which would necessitate a tax hike, which would lead to a drop in consumer spending, which would lead to layoffs, which would deepen the recession even further.

      How can you read that and not love the Onion. (For those not following along at home, it was published in January 2001 and also predicted a war in the Gulf.)

      --
      XML is a known as a key material required to create SMD: Software of Mass Destruction
    3. Re:Onion called, wants their story back by theonesandtwos · · Score: 2

      I'd like to know who at theonion has a crystal ball and where they got it from. If that was actually written in Jan of 2001...that's amazing.

  6. you know your marketting has failed by ILongForDarkness · · Score: 5, Insightful

    When someone breaks into your R & D shop and the only thing they see of value is someone else's gear.

  7. Re:I read that as by Tablizer · · Score: 2

    Ballmer asked R&D to make a translucent minimalist-style Apple chair.....with a parachute.

    --
    Table-ized A.I.
  8. "Turn right at the next dead end" by Tablizer · · Score: 5, Funny

    The thieves wanted to rob Apple, but they made the mistake of using Apple Maps to find it.

    --
    Table-ized A.I.
  9. Re:Microsoft is finished by Enderandrew · · Score: 4, Informative

    Microsoft still turns a hefty profit. They've got massive market share and the company is still experiencing revenue growth, though the rate of growth is declining.

    http://ycharts.com/companies/MSFT/revenue_growth

    Microsoft is losing market share in key markets. There are reasons why Microsoft could stumble, but they are so diversified and have so much capital that it would take a great number of massive failures for them to really go under.

    I wonder how much longer Ballmer will remain CEO.

    --
    http://blindscribblings.com - Tasty pop-culture in conceptual fashion.
  10. iPads can be sold/pawned for cash by Enderandrew · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Microsoft prototypes can't easily be sold. I see the obvious joke that the Microsoft prototypes were not of value, but in a sense, if they can't be sold, then that is true.

    --
    http://blindscribblings.com - Tasty pop-culture in conceptual fashion.
    1. Re:iPads can be sold/pawned for cash by Patch86 · · Score: 2

      Just a guess, but Microsoft probably had Microsoft gear in there for working on, as well as just prototypes. If they're anything like Microsoft employees I know, they'll be following the company orthodoxy of using 100% Windows, except where it is unavoidable.

      So those thieves probably walked past HP Elitebooks at about $1000 a pop, or touch-enabled Thinkpad at $1500, and picked up the $500 iPads instead. That's still pretty embarrassing.

  11. Re:Microsoft is finished by Enderandrew · · Score: 3, Interesting

    The XBox division has gone back and forth between profit and loss over the years.

    http://www.edge-online.com/news/microsofts-xbox-division-loses-229-million/

    The enterprise market really is the bread-and-butter for Microsoft. That is what really amazes me. They seem to be alienating the enterprise market in many ways currently.

    --
    http://blindscribblings.com - Tasty pop-culture in conceptual fashion.