Convicted Spammer Jeffrey Kilbride Flees Prison

An anonymous reader writes with this news from California: "According to the article, 'Officials at the Federal Bureau of Prisons say an inmate escaped from a minimum security area of the federal prison in Lompoc. Prison officials say Jeffrey Kilbride, 48, was discovered missing at around 1:30 p.m. on Friday....A search is reportedly underway. Prison officials say Kilbride was serving a 78-month sentence for conspiracy and fraud. He was due to be released on December 11, 2015.'" Here's why Kilbride was in prison.

Comments

What an idiot.

[Frosty Piss]

Due for release in 2015? Not anymore.

Re:What an idiot.

[rea1l1]

He obviously had a reason to escape immediately. I wonder what was happening to him.

Re:What an idiot.

[plopez]

Either he was stupid or got a death threat from a disgruntled customer. If the latter he could have flipped and gone into witness protection. So probably just stupid,

Re:What an idiot.

[Frosty Piss]

He obviously had a reason to escape immediately. I wonder what was happening to him.

Happening to him? In "minimum security"? Probably boredom, very unlikely any ass pounding.

Re:What an idiot.

[mendax]

Due for release in 2015? Not anymore.

Indeed, escape is a new offense, he will have to spend more time in prison in addition to completing his original sentence, and he will no longer be housed in a Club Fed. He'll be behind the razor wire now. Sucks to be him.

They'll catch him no doubt pretty soon... unless this was coordinated with someone on the outside. If so, he could be far away by now. But they'll catch him eventually. As many people have pointed out recently in many posts on many topics, it's hard to remain anonymous and hide in plain sight these days.

Re:What an idiot.

[EvilSS]

Whatever it was, I doubt it will be any worse that what he'll be in for when he's recaptured (and odds are, he will be). No more minimum security for him. I don't think he will enjoy his new accommodations.

Re: What an idiot.

[AmazingRuss]

He better hope the cops get to him before we do...

Re:What an idiot.

[tomhath]

This kind of person often thinks he's so much smarter than everyone else that he doesn't need to follow the rules like the rest of us fools.When he gets caught he'll blame other people, bad luck, whatever; it's never his fault. After all, he never did anything that was really wrong. Just followed a different set of rules because he's special.

Re: What an idiot.

[Anonymous Coward]

He better hope the cops get to him before we do...

If he doesn't like the ass-kicking I'd give him if I were to meet him, he can just opt out of my boot-to-the-posterior list. Here's how it works. I kick him in the ass, I keep kicking him in the ass until he opts out, and then I sell his name, address, and the GPS coordinates of his ass over to the next ass-kicking professional. He can keep opting out of every ass-kicking-list that any individual provider of ass-kicking services has to offer. What's the harm? It only takes a second to opt out!

Re:What an idiot.

[rmdingler]

Yes. This and he desires the limelight a successful escape will bask him in.

Federal time is pretty cake(lots of money, good control, decent food), and minimum security is where the token Wall Street felon goes once a generation.

He's not running from that at 48 years young with 24 months to do unless he just got some bad news on the biopsy.

Re:What an idiot.

[Austrian Anarchy]

Maybe he thought he was outdoing Christopher Boyce, i.e., Falcon of "Falcon and the Snowman" fame? Boyce stayed out for 1 year 8 months and robbed something like 17 banks while on vacation from incarceration.

Re:What an idiot.

[rmdingler]

But they'll catch him eventually. As many people have pointed out recently in many posts on many topics, it's hard to remain anonymous and hide in plain sight these days.

You know, it's really not.

Quasi-legitimate identities are available to anyone with resources. Sure, your freedom run is dependent upon avoiding arrest & the entire fingerprinting process, leaving people/your old life completely behind, and beginning anew in Kalamazoo... but maybe you're not well-suited for prison and you figure you'd be giving all those luxuries up anyways.

Re:What an idiot.

[moonflower1]

Only in the US. In other jurisdictions every men's urge to be free is recognized and accordingly there are no additional sentences for prison breaks IF nobody gets hurt, bribed, and property doesn't get damaged.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prison_escape#Punishment

Re:What an idiot.

[blue trane]

"Said every person in jail and every kid in detention."

Example of a false positive error. See http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/False_positive_paradox. When your justice system pursues a high conviction rate rather than truth, there are likely more innocent people in jail than guilty.

Re: What an idiot.

[Crudely_Indecent]

Who said we want to harm him. Just a single punch in the arm - for every email he ever sent. After the first million or so, his arm should look like an Italian sausage. It's a good thing he only sent hundreds of millions of messages out....

Re: What an idiot.

[Anonymous Coward]

The harm is in falsely comparing physical violence to words on the internet.

Re:What an idiot.

[Anonymous Coward]

He obviously had a reason to escape immediately. I wonder what was happening to him.

He had some important e-mails to send.

Re:What an idiot.

[JimSadler]

I wonder if he should ever have been in prison in the first place. Now he will have to live abroad or face about ten years of additional cell time. And we should all give a hoot. If you add up the cell time expected, the cost of trials and catching him this guy will devour $500,000 at a minimum in tax dollars. As a tax payer i don't like paying for this type of punishment. Figure that we have at least 50,000 people in the prisons right now who really don't pose much of a threat to anyone. You know, a million here, a million there and pretty soon we are talking about big bucks.

Re: What an idiot.

[RandomFactor]

Vigilantes would be far far far more likely to go all Charles Bronson on some poor slob who's only crime was having a known email address than an actual spammer.

This is why vigilante justice is inappropriate in the case of spam.

Not because it would be 'disproportionate' - Spammers routinely and intentionally destroy entire human lifetimes in aggregate. (This is a role reserved for overly intrusive government and local cable providers.)

Re:What an idiot.

[Anonymous Coward]

going into Protective Custody in prison is the worst thing you can do. everyone will suspect you as a snitch or chomo, at the least you are showing weakness. either way, when you eventually get out of PC and back into GenPop, you'll be marked as a target for bangers to impress the shotcaller or as someone's bitch.

Re:What an idiot.

[Animats]

They'll catch him no doubt pretty soon...

Probably. In the entire history of the Federal prison system, only about 10 people have escaped and were not eventually caught.

He'd already served 3/4 of a 4-year sentence. Less than a year to go.

Re:What an idiot.

[Migraineman]

According to the Bureau of Justice Statistics, there are approximately 6,937,600 offenders under the supervision of adult correctional systems at yearend 2012. Approximately 2.2 million are incarcerated. The remainder are on parole or under community supervision (i.e probation.) I would suggest that your 50k number is low, by at least an order of magnitude.

Re: What an idiot.

[amiga3D]

Fuck off and die. We are fully justified in hating spammers. They are the lowest life form on the planet and should be exterminated.

Re:What an idiot.

[mooingyak]

Only in the US. In other jurisdictions every men's urge to be free is recognized and accordingly there are no additional sentences for prison breaks IF nobody gets hurt, bribed, and property doesn't get damaged.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prison_escape#Punishment

Wow. There are lots of things the US might get wrong, but this ain't one of them.

Also, quoting from your link:

In Mexico, for instance, escapees who do not break any other laws are not charged for anything and no extra time is added to their sentence; however, officers are allowed to shoot prisoners attempting to escape.

Re:What an idiot.

[Yahooti]

And, ole Chris is out a free man now, married to the lawyer who worked the angles to get him released. Living somewhere up the coast, Oregon, I think.

Re:What an idiot.

[amiga3D]

The piece of shit has assaulted millions of people with his unwanted crap thousands of times each. Fuck him. I think they should stick him under a rock and let him rot. People that think they have the right to spam millions of mailboxes wasting the equivalent of thousands of years are rotten mother fuckers and should be behind bars.

Re:What an idiot.

[amiga3D]

It's money well spent. Spammers need to rot in jail and the longer the better. He's caused millions of dollars in damages with his spam shit and if he stays on the loose he'll be back at it. These guys never quit, they think they have the right to annoy us without end.

Re:What an idiot.

[JeffOwl]

Interesting point. But the choice isn't to put him in jail or just tell him to stop. People like this typically don't stop unless forced. So then, what is the cost to the general population of SPAM? Time wasted, resources expended on filtering technology or effort spend manually sifting through the crap. And it wasn't just unsolicited, it was fraudulent as well.

Re:What an idiot.

[Oysterville]

He will learn what we all have learned: opting out doesn't work.

Re:What an idiot.

[chromas]

Banks have Get Out of Jail Free cards. He probably found a stack amongst the moneys.

Re:What an idiot.

[Rich0]

It's money well spent. Spammers need to rot in jail and the longer the better. He's caused millions of dollars in damages with his spam shit and if he stays on the loose he'll be back at it. These guys never quit, they think they have the right to annoy us without end.

If that were true then the sentence should be life, not a few years.

Our justice system is extremely messed-up. It is about punishing people for past transgressions, and not about preventing future transgressions. If anything the way we treat people once they're out just makes them more likely to offend - do you think this guy could get a job running mail servers for a legit corporation once he's out? No, they'd never hire them, so that leaves what he's good at - sending more spam.

People who commit crimes should be kept under an appropriate amount of supervision until they've been rehabilitated to the point where they're not likely to commit future crimes. The right "sentence" isn't going to be the same for every criminal. Some criminals could probably be put on immediate probation for 2nd degree murder, and others might need 30 years in max security for shoplifting. It shouldn't be about punishments that fit the crime, it should be about rehabilitation that fits the criminal. There shouldn't be registered sex-offenders - people likely to re-offend shouldn't be let out at all, and those unlikely to re-offend shouldn't be treated as if they are likely to do so. Whether a criminal in rehabilitation is behind bars or not should depend on how likely they are to re-offend during rehabilitation, and how likely they are to comply with their rehabilitation activities. If they were trusted to be out on bail during their trial, I'd probably trust them to show up on time for their 8 hours a day of brainwashing until they do otherwise.

Re:What an idiot.

[Pentium100]

Nah, I think a better way would be to restrain him and force him to listen to his spam piped trough text-to-speech software for a day or more. The restraining part is required so he does not poke his own ears out.

Re:What an idiot.

[Pentium100]

Less than a year to go.

Not anymore...

Re:What an idiot.

[theshowmecanuck]

Canada can add a couple of years to the sentence. As it should. In fact it should be able to add more for problem prisoners. If there is no consequence of an escape what is the incentive to serve one's sentence exhibiting good behaviour? Believe it or not, these are people you can't just sit down and have an 'adult conversation' with. They have already shown they have no respect for civilized society. I personally think flogging and other corporal punishment should be added back in to encourage good behaviour in prison and incentive to not break the law in future... prison should be ugly enough that it is no longer a thing to aspire to, to give someone 'street cred'.

Re:What an idiot.

[FlyHelicopters]

Man, what a smart post, you deserve a +6 for that!

Re: What an idiot.

[sjames]

OK, so exchange minor annoyance for minor annoyance. Flick his earlobe. Once for each spam he sent.

Re:What an idiot.

[EuclideanSilence]

The idea that the government should "keep people in jail until they change what they believe" is terrifying.

No, we should NOT be judging people based on some arbitrary judges imagining whether they are likely to commit a crime in the future. Rehabilitation is a disgusting concept.

Re:What an idiot.

[John Da' Baddest]

People who commit crimes should be kept under an appropriate amount of supervision until they've been rehabilitated to the point where they're not likely to commit future crimes.

But you assume crime and illegality are the same thing. What about drug-usage offenses? There's probably no finite in-jail punishment time to prevent future toking upon release.

Re:What an idiot.

[lister king of smeg]

Not anymore...not with surveillance cameras everywhere, and facial recognition software tied to every airport and port. His only chance is a small private boat or private airplane from a private airport. Guess you've never read 1984 nor seen Brazil.

Or he could walk across the Canadian or Mexican boarder.

Re:What an idiot.

[adolf]

I personally think that everyone should be forced to spent a meaningful amount of time incarcerated against their will, before they're allowed to form a meaningful opinion about how people who are incarcerated should be treated.

Re:What an idiot.

[Paradise Pete]

He will learn what we all have learned: opting out doesn't work.

This is the winning post. No need for further discussion.

Re:What an idiot.

[Rich0]

The idea that the government should "keep people in jail until they change what they believe" is terrifying.

Agree 100% - what sane person wouldn't? Would I have used the term "brainwashing" if I didn't want you to be terrified?

No, we should NOT be judging people based on some arbitrary judges imagining whether they are likely to commit a crime in the future. Rehabilitation is a disgusting concept.

Sure it is a disgusting concept, but so is preying on the innocent, and locking people up forever, perhaps punctuated by letting them out for a few years to let them prey on the innocent until we lock them up again.

Why do we punish criminals at all? Who are we to decide that spending time to build a car is a legitimate way to obtain a car, and clubbing your neighbor over the head and driving off with their car is an illegitimate way to obtain a car?

The answer is simple - the former society is one where people actually spend their time creating things. The latter society is one where everybody lives in the dark ages defending their small plot of crops against poachers, pledging their fealty to the local warlord in exchange for "protection."

Since most people would rather live in a civilized society, it behooves us to take steps to keep society civilized. That basically requires brainwashing everybody from childhood into not doing anything you think you can get away with. Some people's brains seem to be wired in such a way as to make that lesson easier to learn than others, and some parents do a better job of teaching it. One way or another some people just don't get it and when they become adults they become problems. So, we can either treat them like problems for the rest of their lives and either live with them or lock them up anyway, or we can actually try to do something about them.

Whether you're a nice progressive humanist or a zealot who believe in blowing up the meeting-places of people of the wrong faith, and whether you believe in locking up thieves for six months or cutting off their hands largely depends on how you were brainwashed as a child. Since we're doing it anyway, we might as well do it in a way that results in a society we would want to live in...

Re:What an idiot.

[Rich0]

But you assume crime and illegality are the same thing. What about drug-usage offenses? There's probably no finite in-jail punishment time to prevent future toking upon release.

Well, crime and illegality ARE the same thing. Legality and morality, on the other hand...

Yes, in such a world having laws that make sense is even more important than enforcing them in a way that makes sense. As long as we're dreaming about the one, we can dream about the other as well.

Neither will happen. The majority loves to enforce their perceived brand of righteousness on the minority all the time, though it does change slowly over time. Yesterday's booze is today's drugs, and tomorrow it will be something else. Likewise nobody ever got elected by promising to not be tough on crime, so when somebody commits a crime due to circumstances that are unlikely to ever come up again, don't expect to see him let go without punishment simply because he is unlikely to ever re-offend, even though doing so would probably result in no harm to society and would allow that person to remain a positive contributor instead of a drain.

Re:What an idiot.

[Impy the Impiuos Imp]

Either he was stupid or got a death threat from a disgruntled customer

"Hey goddammit! Those porn traps just had fake penises crazy glued on 'em! >:-( "

Re:What an idiot.

[egr]

I've always heard that the minimum security prisons are the worst. Too much abuse since the prisoners have too much freedom to wander around and not being watched. In maximum security you are locked up most of the time and monitored.

Re: What an idiot.

[MrNaz]

Canadians and Mexicans don't like being walked over regardless whether they are staying in low cost accommodation or not.

Re:What an idiot.

[davester666]

um, it's minimum security. he probably just had step through the turnstile to leave.

Re:What an idiot.

[kelemvor4]

He obviously had a reason to escape immediately. I wonder what was happening to him.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that "he was in prison." There doesn't need to be any reason beyond that.

Re:What an idiot.

[Fear the Clam]

He will learn what we all have learned: opting out doesn't work.

He'll be in a tougher prison, getting a lot of unsolicited male.

Re: What an idiot.

[Some Bitch]

He's modded funny because it's a (slight mis)quote from the Blues Brothers.

Re: What an idiot.

[Hognoxious]

Sometimes the humor is where the harm is. Look at those Charlie Chaplin films where someone slips on a banana skin.

Re:What an idiot.

[Hognoxious]

Suggesting he shouldn't be held to the same rules as any of us is also asenine

No, that's a poisonous gas which has some properties similar to emmonier.

Re:What an idiot.

[stoatwblr]

"I wonder if he should ever have been in prison in the first place"

Yes, he should have been. The annoying thing is that he got such a light sentence for what he did. It reinforces the notion that spamming pays.

In general the courts are FAR too lenient on white collar criminals and go to the other extreme for blue collar and drug-related stuff.

Re:What an idiot.

[Shompol]

30 years in max security for shoplifting

... and execution by a firing squad for stepping on your toe? Because that's the best way to ensure that he is "not likely to commit future crimes"

Re:What an idiot.

[Shompol]

7 years in prison for spamming? What's wrong with some community service and monthly visits from a parole officer?

I am sorry to say this, but spammers from China and Russia have instantly replaced him, and you cannot send them to 7 years of prison without starting a nuclear war. Spam is terrifically easy to stop by technical means: either use spam filters or don't disclose your main email to any corporations, who sell your email as well as your full bio + SSN to anyone who cares to pay anything and are NOT subjected to any prison term for it whatsoever.

Re:What an idiot.

[HiThere]

I don't think you need to be guilty of something to believe he, based on the know evidence, used poor judgement. The probability to me appears to favor that there is something going on that we don't know about. Death threats are one possibility, and they wouldn't necessarily be coming from other prisoners.

Re:What an idiot.

[HiThere]

90% of the people in prison shouldn't be there. There should be some kind of "punishment" that doesn't involve socializing with other folk who are experts in some sort of law breaking. Only the ones likely to be violent should be confined. And even they deserve more humane conditions. (And not socializing with those who are expert in other kinds of law breaking.) Some kinds of learning should not be encouraged.

Also, prison industries should be required to pay a decent wage to their slaves. Yes, it's reasonable that the remaining (i.e. violent) prisoners should work for their keep. But it's not reasonable that anyone should be allowed to profiteer from their work. (Reasonable profits are OK, but it should be at around the level per unit of investment of a chain grocery store.)

Re:What an idiot.

[theshowmecanuck]

I think everyone should be forced to live in the real world before anyone should be able to give any opinion on this subject, not just be an armchair quarterback who has lived a sheltered, politically correct, middle class existence. And before modding this down, read this whole comment and look at the context of this thread.

I had a challenging upbringing with little money. Yeah, boo hoo. I never used it for an excuse to commit crimes. I put myself through school working in a pool hall. That put me in direct contact with customers/people who were gang members, people who had served time for things like murder, manslaughter, armed robbery, property crimes (lot's of those), and/or assaults (lot's of those too), etc. During the couple years I worked there, two people who were customers and one employee I worked with committed murder or manslaugther (all arrested, one committed suicide in jail: one baited a gay man and stabbed him to death, one shot and killed a drug dealer in a deal gone bad, and one stabbed a taxi driver to death). Some missed the murder/manslaughter charge because the person lived. I had a gun pulled on me once.

Sure, many or most customers were quite ordinary and quite nice, and didn't know the backgrounds of some of the people around them. But there were a good number of criminals, pimps, prostitutes, and assorted scum bags who hung out there. Pretty much all of those who engaged in criminal activity bragged about how many times they went to jail and/or prison. It was a badge of honor in their circle. They didn't give a rat's ass about society's rules except to know how to get around them. I could give more examples of the kinds of people I met through working there, but I think this is enough.

So tell me hot shot, what kind of life experience do you have that gives you the moral authority to tell me what kind of opinion I should be allowed to have. And don't ever try to tell me that reading the news or reading about 'things' in the media qualifies you to tell me what opinions I may have. If people commit crimes they should go to prison. And they should serve hard time so they don't want to go back. So they don't want to earn that 'badge of honor'. Now go back to your cushy life and shut the fuck up. And yes I know you have a cushy life because I have yet to meet anyone who has seen the other side of the coin who will gainsay me.

Re:What an idiot.

[theshowmecanuck]

The first rule of being civilized is to do your time when you are caught violating the personal rights of another human being. Now go home and sing some kumbaya.

Re:What an idiot.

[Rich0]

30 years in max security for shoplifting

... and execution by a firing squad for stepping on your toe? Because that's the best way to ensure that he is "not likely to commit future crimes"

You're missing the point. This isn't about eliminating people - it is about rehabilitating people. If somebody simply is never rehabilitated then they're simply never rehabilitated. There are plenty of people who could never live outside of a mental institution, for example. This isn't about punishing them - it is about dealing with them.

It also isn't about increasing penalties. I mentioned probation for second degree murder in the same sentence - a crime that is usually punished more harshly. In general I'd expect most criminals to spend much less time in prison. However, those who truly can't be rehabilitated might spend more time, and my point was that the time spent in prison has nothing to do with the crime they commit.

Nobody is going to spend 30 years in prison "for shoplifting," They're going to spend a lot of time behind bars because they fail to comply with rehabilitation and reintegration into society despite having spent 30 years at it. Shoplifting just might be what gets them on the radar. If somebody is that hardened then better to lock them up before they kill somebody and not after. If they aren't a kleptomaniac then they don't need to be behind bars at all most likely.

Re:What an idiot.

[adolf]

So tell me hot shot, what kind of life experience do you have

Easy. I've been incarcerated against my will for a meaningful amount of time.

(Oh, look! Mr. Cushy-life knows how to take his own medicine!)

Sounds like that prison needs a better

[Arancaytar]

*sunglasses*

spammer filter

YEEEEEEAH

You'd figure the guy would

[future assassin]

used that time to make connections to further his business when he gets out now the retard is fucked.

Re:You'd figure the guy would

[rea1l1]

He was probably spending most of his time trying to not be raped or murdered.

Re:You'd figure the guy would

[Anonymous Coward]

Maybe in max, but in minimum, he will be sleeping on a bunk bed in a dormitory, with other white collar criminals, or criminals short to the gate. He isn't going to get raped, because that means the rapist is going to wind up getting a prison transfer to a real PMITA prison.

Federal prisons are not the craptastic private state/local lockups. They are run by the BOP which tends to know what they are doing, because they have top tier funding compared to spotty state money.

The escapee has gone from the frying pan to the fire. When he is recaptured (and Feds are instrumental in getting their man, as escapes make them look bad), he will not be escaping again... and likely get another ten years added to his sentence... which will be served in a medium to maximum security prison, and these "guests" are people who steal cars over state lines, or violent criminals. Life won't be in a quiet dorm. It will be in a two man cell, perhaps in a pod. He better be damn nice to his cellie unless he wants to sleep with one eye open for the rest of his sentence.

Re:Good for Him

[Frosty Piss]

I'm glad when anyone manages to escape the US incarceration system, aka "hell on earth".

US Federal "minimum security" jails are well known "cake walks", just like most European "minimum security" jails. Often the "inmates" can hold down jobs on the outside (returning to jail at night), get fed reasonably good food, and often even take weekends and more extended vacations with relatives.

Oh yeah, US Federal "minimum security" is a tough game...

Check...

[MichaelSmith]

The local internet cafe

Re:Good for Him

[plopez]

But he was in a minimum security prison aka "Club Fed". The food is better and some of them even have golf courses and tennis courts. Next stop for him will be a real prison.

Re:What drove him to that?

[plopez]

Probably stupidity.

Re:What drove him to that?

[Frosty Piss]

No one escapes prison with such a short sentence left unless they have a good reason.

Happens all the time. It's related to the attitude of those that end up in prison: Many like this guy are narcissists.

US Federal Prison is a well known "cake walk", the food is not bad, the facilities modern and comfortable, with libraries and educational possibilities, and in many cases, the "inmates" can go home on weekends and for longer vacations.

Simply a fact that you have no clue what you are talking about.

Re: Good for Him

[lxs]

Only the spammers.

Re:Good for Him

[rea1l1]

Minimum security prisons no longer as nice as you claim them to be.

Re:What drove him to that?

[reub2000]

Not to mention being sent to an actual prison.

Ahh, I see the problem

[real gumby]

The prison had such good spammer filtering in place that they couldn't even see him leave....

Re:Uh huh huh Kilbride

[Anonymous Coward]

You forgot to allow for the delays in his progress for the times he stops to send unsolicited email to unsuspecting individuals.

Re:Good for Him

[Pentium100]

Prison should be a place where you do not want to be in. If you somehow get put in prison and later released, the conditions there should be so that now you will not want to return there.

Instead of, you know, giving the criminals better living conditions than the poor have, conditions in prison should be bad and the criminals should be forced to do manual labor for free (as part of the sentence), like they did in the USSR.

Or mental illness

[rsilvergun]

As someone who knows a few ppl that are mentally ill, it's often acute. You're normal one day and crazy as a loon the next. It's a brain chemistry thing, but since it's not obviously visible it's tough to get it classified as a disability unless you're crazy all the time. If Club Fed's as nice as everyone on this thread is saying he's probably mentally ill and had an episode. If that's the case by the time he comes to his senses (3 months? A year?) the damage will be done, but he'll be lucid again so he won't be able to claim insanity. And "Temporary Insanity" goes over with judges about as well as you'd expect...

If that's the case I feel sorry for him. He'll spend the rest of his life in and out of trouble with the law. It's damn near impossible to meet parole conditions when you freak the hell out every few years...

Re:Why was he there?

[Anonymous Coward]

Because he was an annoying fuck

Re:Good for Him

[Frosty Piss]

Minimum security prisons no longer as nice as you claim them to be.

Is that so?

http://www.askmen.com/fine_living/top_10/13_top_10.html

Oooo, and look right there: LOMPOC is number 8 on the list...

Given the perfect climate and time to spend outside, the bars are barely a bother as you plot your corporate comeback. Former home to Ivan Boesky and the Watergate guys, youâ(TM)ll be surrounded by a eucalyptus grove in a great wine region not far from Santa Barbara. Itâ(TM)s a pity the tennis courts were removed as a PR gesture to critics who felt guests at this luxury prison had it too easy, but (the good) life continues with the baseball field and volleyball courts.

Oh, and this: "Former inmate's description of minimum security Federal prison: sex, drugs, and rock 'n roll..."

http://boingboing.net/2012/10/23/former-inmates-description-o.html

Yeah, "Real1/1" Federal minimum security is tough business.

Re: Good for Him

[ShanghaiBill]

Right they should just gas everyone with a 15+ year sentence

No, we should not be looking at incarceration as the default punishment for crimes. The only people that should be locked up are people that are a physical threat to other people. Anyone else should have an alternative punishment, such as working for victim restitution. No other country locks up as many people as America, and many other countries have lower crime rates.

Re:Why was he there?

[Anonymous Coward]

But... he killed his bride...

Re:Why was he there?

[Frosty Piss]

He hasn't committed any sort of violent crime. There's no need to remove him from society.

Prison is not just for violent criminals, it's for people who break society's laws, and can not be trusted to behave withing society's rules without some motivation.

I suppose you think all non-violent criminals should be simply asked nicely not rip people off and otherwise "stop being jerks"?

Seriously, you're either a troll or a moron. Both?

Re:Uh huh huh Kilbride

[Anonymous Coward]

Damn, I noticed an uptick in my spam and that explains it.

well

[Anonymous Coward]

maybe he's in it for the free room and board

Re:Good for Him

[zippthorne]

What kind of "high security" allows opportunities for rape to even occur?

put in the same place as blago and skilling

[Joe_Dragon]

It's still got the minimum security feel but with more razor wire

Re:Good for Him

[kqc7011]

Did he keep enough money offshore, so that he can disappear to someplace where he can live comfortable with a new identity?

protip for law enforcement

[PopeRatzo]

What ever you do, shoot to kill. He's probably armed and extremely dangerous and he said your mama's fat.

Re:Good for Him

[Anonymous Coward]

They do not allow people to take the weekends or even vacations off. You can request furloughs but those are only granted in extreme circumstances and if you have a perfect record once while in prison. I know people who were denied furloughs for funerals. You clearly have no first hand experience in the fed prison system.

Drivers in the area are being warned...

[Snufu]

hitchhikers may be spammers. If you see an email on the side of the road, do not open it.

Re:Good for Him

[cusco]

The kind that skimps on guard staff to improve profits, mostly.

This makes no sense

[Boronx]

Why would he want to leave? Getting sent to Lompoc is my retirement plan.

Re:Going to PMITA prison!

[Anonymous Coward]

Hopefully he'll get his inbox filled.

Re:Good for Him

[cusco]

It would be fitting if the banksters were sent to live in the Projects in LA or Chicago, so that they could actually experience what their manipulation of the economy did to real people.

Re:Good for Him

[Mabhatter]

but "manual labor for free" competes with SELLING the government crap. Prisoners growing their own food and washing their own clothes competes with an honest businessman that could be having illegal mexicans do that for big money!

Re:Going to PMITA prison!

[Anonymous Coward]

I'd be happier if his outbox was plugged.

Re:Uh huh huh Kilbride

[Joe_Dragon]

that $0.05 per min for the prison email system is killer.

Re:Good for Him

[Sique]

Actually, prisons are there to deprive you of your freedom. Not more, not less. Everything else are just juvenile revenge dreams.

Re:Going to PMITA prison!

[Anonymous Coward]

And before someone chimes in with the inevitable "I can't believe you're joking about rape", who said we are joking? It's like that Bill Hicks skit telling marketers to go kill themselves. We aren't joking, we truly want it to happen.

Re:Going to PMITA prison!

[colinrichardday]

Would the authorities put him in the same cell as a dissatisfied V1agr4 customer?

Re:Good for Him

[plopez]

Levenworth sucks even worse.

Re:Good for Him

[plopez]

Beats Levenworth. The idiot is now headed for some such facility where he will be locked in with the real animals. Not the white collar types.

Re:Why was he there?

[Anonymous Coward]

Lets be real. Federal prisons are an exception, but most areas of the US have heavily private prison systems, with a contract from the state guaranteeing a 90% bed occupancy rate in every jail, prison, or detention camp.

With this in mind, there are a lot of judges and DAs who -have- to prosecute otherwise pointless cases in order to keep their job. If not, the private prison PACs will be handing money to a candidate who will.

I live in one of these states that has a very sizable private prison system. At one private jail, COs make $8/hour, while over at the county lockup that is public, entry level deputies are making 2-3 times that out of cadet training.

Here in the US, punishments are way out of proportion for crimes. Ever wonder why home invasion stats are spiking? Because the penalty for that is the same as a burglary, and there is less chance of being caught (women in general tend to be easily cowed/threatened and won't report a crime.) Same with murders. If robbery is 20-life just as homicide, might as well have a chance of walking since there are no witnesses.

Want to fix the US system? Stop making it a life sentence of unemployment for even a night in the clink for PI. Also, actively work on rehab, because the primary reason why US crime is so high compared to Europe is drugs (or the crimes that happen when people want their next meth rock.) Fix that, and you will see crime across the board drop. And, no, fixing it is not throwing someone with a meth, smack, or crack addition into Pelican Bay or Limon for life.

Re:Good for Him

[plopez]

"health treatment"

FYI, prisoners get state health care. Wait until all those "three strikes your out" convicts start needing Medicaid. I'm surprised no one has mentioned it.

Re:Good for Him

[plopez]

ANd of course there is an attitude of "No Humans Involved".

Re:Good for Him

[blue trane]

Yep it's in the constitution, prison should be "cruel and unusual".

Loving it

[gorbachev]

I love it when spamming scum does something extraordinarily stupid. Good luck getting into a minimum security prison after this little stunt.

Tin foil hat time

[plopez]

OK, suppose he had been working with really bad people on the outside, e.g. the Russian mob. Let's say these people were angry with him and he got wind of an assassination brewing. So he flips on the bad people but then needs protection. So, the Feds fake a prison break and whisk hm away to witness protection. Or is that just too wacko?

Re:Tin foil hat time

[amiga3D]

Too wacko.

Re:Good for Him

[JimSadler]

You are right! It is just so much better to give convicts a really hard time with boredom and forced mental illness from harsh confinement. That way when they are released they will be so full of love that they will be a real blessing to society. WAKE UP!

Re:Why was he there?

[eskayp]

Violence shouldn't be the only determinant of punishment.
True: Armed Robbery, Assault, Rape, & other violent crimes are a priority for removing people from society.
But they are not the only crimes that can ruin people's lives, sometimes lethally.
Ask anyone who has been devastated by fraud committed by a bank, wall street, or some corporation.

If the non-violent offenders are willing to provide complete restitution to their victims then Club Fed prisons are in order.
If they don't do complete restitution to the victims & society then give them hard time with a violent offender as cellmate.
That's not likely to ever happen considering which segment of our population finances our politicians and calls the regulatory shots.
Several commenters mentioned that Federal Prisons are more capable and professionally managed than State Institutions.
Maybe that's a hint to Federally finance our election campaigns too, in order to level the playing field & minimize buying of elections.

Re:Going to PMITA prison!

[Chris Mattern]

Would the authorities put him in the same cell as a dissatisfied V1agr4 customer?

Seems to me that a *satisfied* customer would be more dangerous...

Re:What drove him to that?

[Anonymous Coward]

No one escapes prison with such a short sentence left unless they have a good reason.

Happens all the time. It's related to the attitude of those that end up in prison: Many like this guy are narcissists.

US Federal Prison is a well known "cake walk", the food is not bad, the facilities modern and comfortable, with libraries and educational possibilities, and in many cases, the "inmates" can go home on weekends and for longer vacations.

Simply a fact that you have no clue what you are talking about.

Obviously written by a right-winger who has no real idea what prison is actually like. Stop getting your information from fox-"news".

Re:Going to PMITA prison!

[Artifakt]

You truly want it to happen...
      You want the less powerful offenders, the non-violent ones, the ones who aren't so dangerous, raped by the most violent and physically dangerous prisoners. You want those already most dangerous ones to get the message that a moderate amount of crime doesn't pay, but pedal to the metal violent overdrive has its perks. You want the guards to have to work around criminals who expect to be bought off with a supply of victims instead of staying in line for fear of more punishment. You want the prisons to be full of racist gangs constantly ready to riot, and using protection from the rapists on the other side as their chief recruiting tool. You want the rapists and murderers in there to get more practice at violence before their inevitable release, more confirmation that violence gets them what they want. You want prison to not be as bad for the worst of the worst, by making it hell for the rest of the people in there.

Yes, you want it, and now you know, deep inside, that your want has nothing to do with justice.

Re:Going to PMITA prison!

[colinrichardday]

With respect to sodomy, yes. With respect to sheer anger, perhaps not so much.

Re:Good for Him

[colinrichardday]

The "high security" refers to the public's security, not the prisoners' security.

Re:Why was he there?

[ub3r n3u7r4l1st]

"Federal Prisons are more capable and professionally managed than State Institutions. And State Institutions are more capable and professionally managed then private institutions."

Surprise! Government is more efficient then the private sector!

Re:Good for Him

[FuzzNugget]

Uh, yeah, I'm gonna need some proof on that. Everything I've read about US prisons have indicated that they're a barbaric hell of inhumanity and sadism. Given the current political and legal climate, that's what I'm inclined to believe until evidenced otherwise.

Re: Good for Him

[amiga3D]

No. Don't kill them. That's letting them off too easy. Put them in a hardcore prison with the general population and make them wear a shirt that says "spammer."

Re: Good for Him

[amiga3D]

Nice. You fucked over millions of people wasting hundreds of hours per person over the years adding up to about 50,000 lifetimes dealing with your shitty spam so we'll make you pick up crap on the side of the highways for the next millennium or so 24/7/365. I like it. Punishment actually fits the crime.

Re:Good for Him

[amiga3D]

I think he wanted it.

Re:Going to PMITA prison!

[swillden]

You should use gmail and lose the hate along with the spam you'll no longer see. You'll live longer.

Re:Good for Him

[whoever57]

Wait until all those "three strikes your out" convicts start needing Medicaid. I'm surprised no one has mentioned it.

No need to wait. Just look at California. Inadequate medical treatment for inmates has been in court for years.

Re:Going to PMITA prison!

[jones_supa]

Nerd rage, the funniest form of rage... ;)

Re:Good for Him

[amiga3D]

I think the white collar types deserve some of that enlightenment. Let them see how the other half lives.

Re:Good for Him

[amiga3D]

Is your brother in law a spammer? Just asking.

Re:Going to PMITA prison!

[amiga3D]

Oh well. I'd just finished wading through my ISP's spam filter looking for an e-mail that got caught there. After looking at all that crap for the 20 minutes it took to find the legit message I needed it left me with a desire to choke the life out of these parasitic fuckers.

Re:"discovered missing"

[Joe_Dragon]

A fake head passes the night count.

Re:"discovered missing"

[jones_supa]

His "missingness" was the thing that was discovered, not him.

Lessons to be learned.

[westlake]

The only people that should be locked up are people that are a physical threat to other people.

The geek as white collar criminal is insufferably arrogant and self-absorbed. It is damn tough to break through that shell. Prison is the one thing he can't laugh off.

Re:Lessons to be learned.

[Hognoxious]

Making him do community service (like wiping hobos' butts or something) 50 hours a week for the rest of his natural life would probably work too.

Check the library...

[slapout]

The emails...they're coming from inside the prison!

Re:Why was he there?

[DarwinSurvivor]

You do realize Kilbride was only sentenced to 4 years right?

Re:Good for Him

[theshowmecanuck]

I agree.

Escape Prison With This 1 Weird Trick

[Wuhao]

You Won't Believe What Federal Marshals Did When They Caught Him!
12 Great Ways To Pass Your Extended Sentence
Think "Cool Hand Luke" Was Just a Movie? Think Again!

pity

[onyxruby]

If he had been executed as he should have been we wouldn't have this problem. Death for spam, surely this sentence is the law in some country somewhere...

Re:Going to PMITA prison!

[lister king of smeg]

What email provider doesn't the one that resist get taken down look just at lavabit.

Re:Good for Him

[Mashiki]

Being deprived of the ability to go where you please IS unpleasant, you stupid fuck.

Really? Let's see in most min. security prisons you can: Go for a walk, get outside without supervision, get day visits to large public areas providing it's not a violation of your conditions if you had any before you went to jail. You can get weekends out, get pretty much the same amenities that you would have in a small apartment including full privacy. The gates are effectively open between 10am and 5pm daily, so if you have the ability you can walk right out.

Yep pretty unpleasant. Oh did I forget to mention you get medical, dental, vision, and upto including university courses? So, you stupid fuck...perhaps you should realize that some of us have family that works in the prison system dealing with scum retrobates. Then again, if you were in there perhaps you should have used that glorious thing called a brain and not end up there in the first place.

Re:Good for Him

[mjwx]

Uh, yeah, I'm gonna need some proof on that. Everything I've read about US prisons have indicated that they're a barbaric hell of inhumanity and sadism. Given the current political and legal climate, that's what I'm inclined to believe until evidenced otherwise.

Most pen's will be like that, the places where they send really dangerous criminals like drug users to be educated by thugs, gang bangers and other people convicted of crimes slightly less serious than using drugs, like aggravated assault, assault with a deadly weapon and armed robbery.

But we're talking about a minimum security prison, this is where they send the white collar criminals who's only infraction was ripping millions off unsuspecting people or violating safety codes that resulted in several deaths. Clearly nowhere near as dangerous as smoking a bong. Here the white collar criminals are looked after and afforded the dignity they deserve. There probably isn't even a lock on the gate as we all know white collar criminals are trustworthy, forthright and honest souls who'd never think of abusing the trust we place in them like uncaring sociopaths.

Re:Why was he there?

[cbhacking]

No, I really don't. Let's see... right out of the summary, we get the length of his sentence. (78 months) / (12 months / year) = 6.5 years. "6.5" doesn't really look like a "4" to me.

Re:Going to PMITA prison!

[ultranova]

After looking at all that crap for the 20 minutes it took to find the legit message I needed it left me with a desire to choke the life out of these parasitic fuckers.

Because slightly inconveniencing you is not only deserving of being raped 2500 times in a row but in fact far worse than molesting children. That's not at all insane, no sir.

I guess that shows if you absolutely must huff gasoline, at least get the unleaded stuff.

Prison won't help the situation

[damn_registrars]

Throwing spammers in prison (or even pursuing the popular option of executing them) won't solve the problem. Spamming is an international epidemic driven by economics. As long as spammers can make money they will continue to send spam. The correct way to address this problem is to interrupt the flow of money so that the spammers don't turn a profit. Only once that is done will spam cease to be a problem, every other approach is only a stopgap measure for an arms race that we can only fail when we escalate.

78 Months

[nurb432]

Not anymore...

Moron. Not a lot of time, and he was in a minimum security prison to boot.

Re:What drove him to that?

[nurb432]

He is just nuts. Thinks hes above the system.

Re:Going to PMITA prison!

[swillden]

Cite?

Re:Good for Him

[Hognoxious]

I think hell is pretty much an absolute. There isn't such a thing as heller or hellist.

Funny

[Patent Lover]

Kind of funny how we can track kids at school with rfids but not inmates. Despite 10 fold in spending.

Re: Good for Him

[Shompol]

As long as you can hold the cable companies punishments up to your high standards. So far it is only the little people who get years in jail for spam.

That explains the increase in spam this morning

[Optali]

My mailbox was completely full !!!

Re:Some birds aren't meant to be caged

[X0563511]

I'd prefer he get busy dying. Hopefully that's what is happening, actually.

Brave New World!

[ulatekh]

Since most people would rather live in a civilized society, it behooves us to take steps to keep society civilized. That basically requires brainwashing everybody from childhood into not doing anything you think you can get away with.

I believe this idea was explored pretty thoroughly in a famous novel. I also remember trying to argue in favor of such a society with my high school English teacher. She thought I was a horrible person for even thinking that and refused to discuss it. She educated me that day...just not in the way she intended.

Followup - he's been caught

[Animats]

Followup - He's back in prison. "Lompoc Escaped convict turns himself in".

He's probably not in the minimum-security camp any more.