Slashdot Mirror
Online Creeps Inspire a Dating App That Hides Women's Pictures
HughPickens.com (3830033) writes "Tricia Romano reports at the Seattle Times that Susie Lee and Katrina Hess have developed Siren, a new online dating app designed to protect against men inundating women with messages that are by turns gross, hilarious, objectifying and just plain sad. A 2012 experiment by Jon Millward, a data journalist, found that women were messaged 17 times more than men; the best-looking woman received 536 messages in four months, while the best-looking guy received only 38. Lee hopes to change the nature of the messages and put women in the driver's seat. As online dating options have grown, Lee noticed that her friends' frustration did, too: With every good introduction often came a slew of lewd ones. "I just started looking (at online dating options) and very quickly realized how many things are out there and how immediately my 'creepy meter' went up," Lee says. The free iPhone app, currently launched to a select market in Seattle in August, allows women to peruse men's pictures and their answers to the "Question of the Day" ("You found a magic lamp and get three wishes. What are they?") and view their Video Challenges ("Show us a hidden gem in Seattle"). If a woman is suitably impressed by a man's answers, she can make herself visible to him. Only then can he see what she looks like. "It's a far more thoughtful — and cautious — approach than the one taken by the dating app of the moment, Tinder, which is effectively a "hot or not" game, with little information beyond a few photos, age and volunteered biographical tidbits," writes Romano. "And the implicit notion that it's a "hookup" app can be uncomfortable for some women."
OK Cupid's stats as illustrated by co-founder Christian Rudder give another example of how steep the curve is, when it comes to physical attractiveness vs. messages received on online dating sites.
Women just message the men they like instead.
service for blind men/women?
it upsets the natural order of men pursuing women. Women wont be able to handle being in the driver's seat and facing rejection.
My recommendation is take the rejection at face value and in private, instead of meeting up for a date and have the guy run screaming because you're a 450 pound overweight lard-ass
They are already there (in the dating game). And they were always there.
I take my children to see Madonna(..), but I never for once ever thought I was in the same business.Chris Rea.
The whole dating situation is ridiculous these days. Dozens, or even hundreds of guys email a couple of women and almost none get any response at all; is it any wonder they escalate to crap? A response, positive or negative, is better than no response to a lot of people.
If you're in the top 20% on looks, congrats. Otherwise: you get treated like shit, whichever side your on.
As if I'm going to jump through hoops just to get to look at a girl? This starts the relationship out on a bad note -- one where the guy has accepted responsibility for the actions of others and is willing to make sacrifices as a result. This is sexism at its strongest, unless it works in both directions -- ie, no pictures are displayed until a user chooses to present themselves to another.
>A 2012 experiment by Jon Millward, a data journalist, found that men would have to initiate courtship and solicit meetings 17 times more than women
>The free iPhone app also allows women to passively wait around expectantly, but also be able to one-sidedly judge men's physical appearances and answers to the "Question of the Day"
k.
I can't see any men wanting to use this when there are so many other options out there. What's their incentive? I get that women might want to have more control, but if they don't want their pictures seen on ANY dating site they have a simple solution: don't upload one! Have one around to send to a guy who interests you, but don't post it publicly. Done! Making an app that is so blatantly sexist and skewed is another solution, but only the saddest, most pathetic guys will even log on! Is that what they want?
Can't women just do this on any other dating site by not having any photos on their profile and sending photos once they've been talking to a man for a while?
Why would a man join this site compared with dating sites that let him see photos and don't make him jump through silly hoops?
Bogtha Bogtha Bogtha
" If a woman is suitably impressed by a man's answers, she can make herself visible to him. "
It seems pretty unworkable to me. I suppose these women must be a mix of Angelina Jolie/Kate Upton and Jennifer Lawrence, to insist on being anonymous.
What I don't understand is why would a desirable man put up with all of these games just to view a woman's picture? If a man is attractive enough to get replies and messages from women on online dating sites in general (most men can easily send out hundreds of messages to get only a handful of replies), presumably he's attractive enough to go on other sites that don't make the man jump through these hoops, just to view the woman's picture, let alone go out on a date.
Which means that the men who are willing to put up with these kinds of hoops wouldn't be attractive to these women in the first place.
This Sig does not Exist.
...have a "report" system that censures or bans someone after enough negative reports are made about them, either in absolute terms, or in relation to the number of conversations that have an exchange of more than two volleys?
This doesn't seem like it would be all that hard to fix, without resorting to unusual measures like the ones brought up.
Do not look into laser with remaining eye.
If you TRULY want to solve the problem of abusive men, then the solution is simple:
Create a website where the men can NOT make first contact.
You don't have to require the women to actually write an email - heaven forbid you do that. Just set it up so that the women have to 'wink' (or whatever you want to call it), at the men before the guy can write back.
This would have several advantages - including saving the men from wasting their time.
excitingthingstodo.blogspot.com
While im not saying its okay to dig up personal information through google searches and then freaking out the girl by sharing the information the creep dug up, I do find it concerning that she is victim blaming google for finding this information that she was responsible for making public in the first place. Google doesn't make available information that you hadn't posted online in the first place.
A dating app that will go almost completely unused.
Yea I guess it's a seller's market if you're a woman but this piece is thoroughly biased.
One CLEAR data point is that women are just as fickle as men, look at the interest shown in all those profiles. Only two got hits and it had NOTHING to do with wit or intelligence, it was all about looks as first impressions always are.
Video Challenge: Upload a video of your paycheck.
I haven't been on a dating site for some time since having found someone (not on a dating site, BTW) and taking myself out of the game. But several years ago I was on a couple of dating sites geared specifically towards Christians. I was in my 40's and looking for age-appropriate matches. I try to be as well mannered online as I am face to face, especially on a dating site. I had very little problems getting responses, and what I learned from many of the women I talked to surprised me. A lot of them told me about how lewd and creepy the men were -- and this was supposed to be a Christian dating site! In contrast I always behaved as a gentleman, and in fact, I had to hide my online status sometimes because when I logged on I would get inundated with chat requests.
Unfortunately I never found anyone who was a great match. Distance was usually a problem. I met someone the traditional way.
It seems to me that a lot of people cannot handle the anonymity that an online presence provides. This is true, not just of dating sites, but everywhere. There is a tendency to objectify everyone. Men are particularly bad at it, but I've seen women do it too. The thing is, people like to be treated like people. A good rule of thumb is to not say anything to anyone that you wouldn't say within arm's reach.
Proverbs 21:19
You're doing it wrong.
Not wrong as in "that's wrong to do", but wrong as in "you'll do better with people you interact with in the real world."
If, of course, you can put the cellphone/iPad/keyboard down for enough minutes to interact with the people around you.
Online profiles are far more "crafted" than real-world interactions, and real-world interactions provide far more clues when someone is gaming you.
I've fallen off your lawn, and I can't get up.
Morbo finds your puny human mating rituals strange and pathetic.
than this crap.
I doubt this will work better than anything on any other site. I've been trying to get a date through OkC, PoF, Match, eHarmony et al for 10 years. Next summer I will be 40 and still a virgin. I intend to shoot myself.
And they wouldn't recognize heavy metal if it fell from the sky and crushed them. Fuck that shit.
I write sci-fi for metalheads
They claim that the best looking man only received 38 messages in four months. That's totally untrue. I received 43 messages.
Cloudiot: A person who does not see offsite storage as a way to lose control over access to his or her own data.
"the best-looking woman received 536 messages in four months, while the best-looking guy received only 38."
That's a significant difference, are women expecting to be pursued (in the right way) online too?
"If any question why we died, Tell them because our fathers lied."
" Tinder, which is effectively a "hot or not" game...And the implicit notion that it's a "hookup" app can be uncomfortable for some women."
Implicit notion? Thank you Captain Obvious.
If a woman assumes Tinder is anything but a "hookup" app, then she has just shown me the very reason to avoid her, for my ignorance alarm is blaring. I really don't need to take a look at the intelligence meter or even the rest of the package.
It's not like our online dating app choices are Tinder and...Tinder.
And Tinder is used for one thing.
Isn't it better to tolerate a system that makes the worst creeps show their creepiness so then you know who to avoid?
They just can't take the blows to their ego.
A 2012 experiment by Jon Millward, a data journalist, found that women were messaged 17 times more than men; the best-looking woman received 536 messages in four months, while the best-looking guy received only 38. Lee hopes to change the nature of the messages and put women in the driver's seat.
And what is the ratio of Men to women on the websites this "data journalist" got his info from? How did they objectively define who was the best looking woman vs the best looking man? Also, different criteria than "What someone looks like" might be important to women....
Every other dating app allows you to hide or show your pictures at will. This is nothing but the removal of a feature. Considering those who don't show pictures are less desirable to contact than those who do, and some women will undoubtedly want to show pictures to make use of their advantage in attractiveness, this will simply weed the most undesirable women from the regular dating sites. Undesirable in the sense that men would rather message the women with images. I guess it will work in the sense that only the lowest self esteem men will go there, and the women that the higher value men wouldn't be interested in won't be cluttering up match or whatever people use nowadays.
I can report that my findings indicate that the worst-looking guy receives 0 messages in four months.
Your font looks so good. How about we get together and kern that shit?
If you were me, you'd be good lookin'. - six string samurai
This topic has the unstated assumption that reactions to men's looks should be compared to reactions to women's looks. Women tend to judge men by their wallet or social status far more than looks. If you are a rich dude with a Lamborghini, you would get flooded with potential suitors just like a female super-model look-alike.
Table-ized A.I.
It has been tried. A dating site was made where only women could initiate contact. The result? It went nowhere because women wouldn't initiate contact in almost any case. Men couldn't women wouldn't, so it didn't go anywhere.
The thing is not only do we have a cultural bias that men are supposed to initiate relationships, but the person who initiates puts their emotions on the line, sets themselves up for rejection. Women do not wish to do that by and large, and do not need to since men are very willing to initiate so they just don't.
Unless we are able to change that, such a site will go nowhere. The vast majority of women will just be unwilling to initiate a relationship and thus the site will wither and die.
...then simply create a profile that doesn't have a picture. Then state in the profile that pictures are available upon request. The fact of the matter is that everyone has a standard that they will not go past. Some peoples standards are lower/higher than others. If you are overweight you can't expect to date an underwear model. If you are lower middle class you can't expect to date someone making six figures plus. The only exception to the rule is a women making less than six figures may be able to land a guy making more than six figures if she is smoking hot that is where the phrase "Arm Candy" came from.
First, answering dumbass interview questions and showing hidden Seattle gems is actually dating. That's not finding a date, that's dating. Forcing guys to date a mystery woman before being able to see her only to then try to date her just won't work. You've done nothing but add another layer to the already-anonymous layer. Can you imagine even the most successful online dating guy, who engages ten women in a month, is now being interrogated twice each week, coming up with hidden gem videos and countless other things. Poor guy! That's a lot of work. Or would you accept a guy who sends the same videos and answers to every women he engages? That's called a profile. A big one. Which is creepy again.
Second, the definition of a creepy guy is one who is on a dating site. Every guy on a dating site is creepy. Quite frankly, so are women on dating sites. Welcome to the concept of a list of people looking for other people. That's creepy from the get go. If you're looking for not creepy, then you're seeking a guy who pretends to not be doing exactly what he/s doing which is exactly what you wanted him to be doing -- looking for you.
Third, 17 to 1. Because a guy will engage 17 women, whereas most women won't engage anyone. 17:1 is less of a message ratio and more of a browsing ratio.
Here's a solution: a site where guys aren't able to engage women at all. That'll solve your problem. then you can just wait for women to engage men. the species will die out, and this problem will be solved.
Glad I'm through with dating -- hope I never find myself back there, certainly not online dating.
Article is about the picture's attractiveness... website only provides low res pictures so that the readers can not independently judge attractiveness or determine if perhaps there is something else in the picture that matters.
In the case of a meat-market, anonymity creates a halo effect for women. That is, women think they will meet some George Clooney look-alike. Instead, dating sites are filled with men not attractive/rich enough to immediately pull a date.
Men aren't as fussy as women, but in a meat-market they will choose the youngest and prettiest women. When that fails and they're jaded with the online dating service, they will choose less attractive women.
Is it really that huge an issue ? Screen the uploaded photos and don't let people attach one in their initial message, but as a guy I prefer not to be treated like a creep just because a few of us are.
Uh-oh. This is in WA state. It’s possible that n+2 females (they almost always work in pairs) posing as “datable women” are undercover feminazi cops (creepstalkers) looking for men to gaslight, seize every possession said men have, then exterminate them.
Don't know what man would want to send messages to women they can't see.
For the same reason women should wear burkas in real life. Should cut down on cat calling significantly. I mean, how do you know it's not a guy hiding underneath? And yes, when faced with a societal problem, always ask yourself - can it be solved by making things less transparent?
And the ratio of messages sent by men and by women?
As a short guy how much it sucks to try and date. I'm lucky in that I'm quite tall but man, are women stuck on height. Most women will NOT date a man shorter than them. It is a deal breaker to them for whatever reason. They also seem to feel it is perfectly reasonable, and not just very shallow.
It really sucks for short guys because at least with looks you can generally do something. While you can't change your looks radically you can lose weight, work out, wear better clothes, etc and improve your looks at least somewhat. Also cosmetic surgery is a more drastic approach that can modify some things. There's fuck-all you can do about height though. You are 5'1"? That's what you are.
Women like to think they aren't shallow, and of course some really aren't (as some men aren't) but most are they just lie to themselves about it. One of the issues is that women tend to have a skewed view of men. They believe most men are below average. OKCupid did an interesting study on this. Men rated women's pictures on a bell curve of attractiveness, as one would expect. Women rated most men below average. So what you get is a lot of women who believe they've "settled" for a below average guy and thus aren't caring about looks, when in reality they've "settled" for an average or above average guy and just haven't gotten a hunk.
So..
Attractive women get more replies, implying that they have an advantage in that they have a larger pool of prospective partners to choose from, allowing them to be much more highly selective, and they are complaining about.. having options? That must be so terrible for them.
Everyone has a "type", and physical attraction will always matter, to a degree.
I absolutely guarantee the women who may be tempted to use the dating website referenced in this thread have a "type", as well - 5'10" or taller, height/weight proportionate, no thinning receding hairline, attractive facial features, car no more than 4 years old, and any and all photos taken at home will have the background scrutinized with the skill of a CIA photo interpreter to determine your relative level of career and personal success.
A Redditor conducted a little experiment on Tinder a while back. He constructed three fake male profiles. One "ugly" guy, one "average looking guy", and one "underwear model." .. Would you care to guess the resul.. oh wait, you already did! The top 10% of Tinders' users get 90% of the attention, and if you aren't moderately to extremely attractive, you are all but invisible.
http://redditlog.com/snapshots...
The women mentioned in the parent article need to simply hit the "block" or "report" buttons on whatever dating site they're on, and get over themselves already, because they're just as bad if not worse than the men in the "chasing looks" department.
THIS SPACE INTENTIONALLY LEFT BLANK.
Or to put it another way: 536 men approached the best-looking woman while 38 women approached the best-looking man. What happened to getting a date being a play-the-numbers game? Why aren't women joining that game, they joined the web-site after all? Where are the feminists demanding they can do anything men do and do it better?
in men. they just pretend for a while to get babies and money.
What's up with the slashdot feminazi posts? Maybe it's time for me to get off /. and use the time contacting their advertisers. I'm really not interested in reading a blog that demonizes men... just sayin'
Where does the score for a post come from? Can anyone score another post?
That i live long enough to see the rise of either good virtual reality or sex robots.
Because it will be damm entertaining to watch the major shift in how women go about dating.
They will lose all power and control over the entire scene. It will be glorious.
80% of men will pickup a 10 bot or virtual girlfriend and forget about women completely.
I expect it to happen in my lifetime. Hope so. It's going to be a good show.
All the gold diggers, princesses, and everyone else suddenly faced with the reality that nobody wants to put up with their bullcrap without sex.
All those women who wouldn't give the average guy a second look suddenly competing HARD over what few men still want to put up with a real womans bullcrap.
It's going to be epic. And hilarious.
This is one of the favorite poisons that women (demons in clown suits) like to use to assassinate men they don’t like. The evil that females are capable of is in a class by itself. Dating, or attempting to date, any female from/in WA state is the equivalent of signing your own death warrant. I say this because, at least in WA, there is a latent feminist movement that is picking up steam, and, at some point in the future, gender-based civil conflict will be the result. There might be a reason the Bible doesn’t have much good to say about females. They were intended to be subservient to men, not the other way around. Females tend to preach how they want equality, when in reality, they want superiority. If they actualize that which they seek, which they’re presently doing, society itself will become hosed.
As a single, law-abiding male with no criminal record, when I go take a walk at the local park by myself, I get one “dirty look” after another from almost every female that is present. I assume it’s solely because I’m by myself; there is no female accompanying me. Also, while at the local park, I frequently observe “barbie dolls” (undercover female cops) posing as everything from college girls to hookers, trying to roundup all the dregs of humanity (men) that they can; I can always spot the barbie dolls’ backup within the vicinity. The same kinda thing happens in various downtown areas; barbie dolls trolling around for whatever scum (men) they can ensnare; I think the local po-po calls it “creepsweeping”. Gender-based persecution of men is already happening, and it will get worse.
I enrolled in a tech. school several years ago & achieved a 2-year degree in an electronics discipline. Not long after I started attending, I discovered to my dismay that the “creepsweeper brigade” was present. There were two barbie dolls present that worked at this private institution, and two of their backups (male undercover cops) were in the same class I was in; they didn’t have to pay tuition. I can almost always out undercover cops (including decoys, or barbie dolls); they have a propensity for displaying an unusual level of stupidity, and they’re very poor actors. One of the barbie dolls (decoys) tried trolling (expressing an interest) in me, and her method of expression was way over-the-top, ahem; she had just outed herself as a decoy. I was/am an ugly SOB; I’m repulsive to females, but animals like me, though. One guy in my class disappeared under suspicious circumstances, never to return. Not much later, another guy in my class vanished, only to return a few months after his disappearance; the reason he gave for his disappearance never did make much sense, and his personality had changed slightly. I have always suspected the creepsweepers got ‘em. I can’t say this enough, STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM FEMALES IN WA STATE. IF YOU’RE A GUY, YOU COULD LOSE YOUR LIFE!
I didn't see anyone point out the obvious flaw to this idea yet. What's the incentive for men to sign up and use this service? If you don't have men for the women to meet, this will die a quick death.
Did Anita Sarkeesian take a shit all over Dice? First the Facebook/Trans article, then the Intel/Gamergate article, and now this? Come on, you are better than stooping to this level.
Buck Feta. You know what to do.
Ok so she posts that she prefers men who are at least six feet tall. I post that I prefer women with small waists and a 38D bra size and it must not be enhanced breast sizes. Is that any worse than her preference for tall men? Or if I post no women over 110 lbs will be considered is that any worse than a post saying that she will only date height and weight proportional men? Women are far more prejudiced than men as a general rule.
n/t
men cant see pictures, women cant see job/income.
seems fair.
surely that just proves you ARENT the best looking man?
Note to women: if you dated and then married a guy who is charming and able to approach a strange woman (you) with self-confidence, do you really have any right to complain when he continues to exhibit those characteristics after you are married?
The answer of course is Yes. Even if being able to talk to women made you a playa, getting into a relationship and particularly marriage means you're not supposed to do that any more.
But don't make it too easy for them. Basically, make them work for it. Everyone appreciates more what they can't have.
Really liked your comment, particularly the last line.
I've done online dating. And my friend has told me what gay male dating is like. I'm curious as to what women WLTM women online dating is like.
Move to Brazil.
While you beta clowns are trying to suck up to ugly bitches who can't get your attention in the real world. You won't be in the way of men with testicles trying to fuck girls who are worth fucking.
I never date. My best woman friends (where the friendship last longer) have been those (with woman) that initiate contact with me! If they are interested to the point of coming to talk with me, they may not want to marry me or even have sex... but I will have good times with them, and them with me (not sex in my case)... because they initiate the contact and will want to make the extra effort to be with me and all of that without fake excuses.
About this and another web sites/ apps for smartphones, for woman it's great... but most of them won't put themselves on this kind of web sites... they just open a facebook account and they will have a lot of strangers (or not so strangers) to choose from. For a lot of time I had a female friend (~20y) that was very hot (like all kind of man trying to get her! not just in the Internet...) and the one boyfriend that last longer (and she is still with him) was her that initiate the contact in a disco club, then he start talking to her in facebook and they are together for a while now... and she didn't think he was very hot, was just ok (she even thinks he is a little more heavy than he should for her taste), but he was good with the writing and talking in person... and she didn't like is music either, but still was convinced by is talking... and the BMW didn't hurt (although he is/ was having financial problems because of having to pay the car).
So the point is: if the woman finds you somehow attractive to her, you don't have to be pretty, very physical in shape (drag your own weight is normally break deal point), not even to have a lot of money or the same musical tastes! But you do have to have lots of texting and spoken skills otherwise you will be in trouble! Also have time for her, while being solicited from others to be present everywhere can help because she will see you has somehow important guy... and woman, specially this hot girls seem to like those man, more than the ones that don't seem important to anyone else.
Woman don't like to be the firefighter of the man all the times... they have their own problems, and generally they want a boy to help fix the problems, not to make it bigger! Their are exceptions I'm sure, but "normal" whatever that means, hot girls, seem more like this.
For those that are shy just quit all social networks and walk around, go to supermarket and those kind of places. Quit social networks, because unless you are having lots of success with woman their you are probably just ruin your own pride with woman after woman saying "no" to you. If you are like me where literally all woman say "no" to you (internet and outside the internet), the only way around is stay away from social web sites, and start walking around. You may look to them, even smile... or say goodbye from a running car or even better, a bus! But never stalk them through the streets or like that and never say anything to them! If they notice you and are attracted to you they will eventually take the first step! And if they take the first step they are more likely to try to make the relation be it friendship of more intimate relationship work... even if you just get to be her friend she eventually have more female friends, that have another females friends and you will eventually get to someone that actually will date you. Having female friends is good because the others females are more likely to want to meet you, since so many females are around you and feel comfortable around you, probably you aren't that bad. Having a lot of man's that are your friends can also be very good, just having female friends seems also to be a "No" "no" factor... at least for the hot girls (maybe they think "is this guy gay?").
Christ Slashdot is depressing these days. Any article at all that mentions how women have a shit time in the digital world and the overwhelming majority of comments disagree, and those marked Insightful or Funny are almost exclusively whines from men about how it's all the fault of women and the "SJW crowd". If you're lucky, there'll be one or two +5 Interesting comments expressing alternative view. And they're always Interesting, never Insightful - it's as if these alternative views are *news* to people. It's just depressing.
What was this website called? Any evidence to support your claim that it failed "because women wouldn't initiate contact in almost any case" rather than some other reason?
Thought I stumbled into r/TheRedPill.
Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.
-- Arthur C. Clarke
This story made my day! I am, in fact, a guy, and I like smart, interesting women. This sounds like a really good way to meet them. This app sounds like it would let me wow them with my sexy brain, instead of the other way around. Any woman I would be into would dig that, and I probably wouldn't be into any woman who wouldn't dig that. ... and judging from most of the comments in this thread, it looks like I have a good chance of standing out from the crowd. I am simultaneously disgusted by my gender and overjoyed at my luck. (And you people call yourself geeks! WTF?!!)
The only downside is that I currently live in Missouri. :/ It would probably be faster to move to Washington State than to wait for this app to hit any city near me.
This shit just isn't an issue for me. ;>
So you're saying being a creep helps drive technological innovation? You're welcome!
These things should be discussed prior to 'going steady' or whatever kids call it these days.
It is the Man's job to pursue the woman, not the other way around.
Read "Mars and Venus on a Date." The author explains in excruciating detail how courtship is actually supposed to work, and why most relationships today fail. Women are trying to assume the Man's responsibilities in relationships, and that is emasculating and turns Men off.
In the initial part of establishing a dating relationship, for example, it's the Man's duty to chase her and give to her - whether it be compliments, gestures, or gifts, and it is also his duty to be the planner. It is the Woman's duty to receive what he has to offer, and let him know his efforts are appreciated. This is what makes a Man more excited about a Woman - acknowledgement of his role as a provider and conqueror. When the Woman tries to assume the Man's role as giver, he feels emasculated and inadequate.
This is why Women never message Men on dating sites. It greatly reduces their chances of landing a solid relationship.
Women get a ton of messages because guys are supposed to start the conversations (in the US). Some females even list that they wont message you first on their Tinder profile. Being submissive is the way things go and then people bitch about it when people go out of their way to message them? Jesus, just push ignore and move on. No one is forcing you to continue to listen to them. Just another thing that's wrong with female culture in the US as well.
But we all know a app where females have to communicate first wont fly, so they have to make something ass backwards like a dating show for every female out there. The amount of messages each female gets will decrease over time as females become more prominent online as well.
Oh my..... I see the online dating site OKstupid (Oops I mean OKcupid) is getting some press. A site with the most clueless people I have ever met.
That's the core concept behind this new app.
The usual approach is to optimize the system for men looking for women (profiles and communication protocol closely matches how men approach women in social settings)
What's novel about this app, is they've optimized it for women looking for men (prevents the men from mass messaging anyone they think looks hot, which forces the women to take a more active role and seek out men they find interesting, while offering a protocol designed to make fabricating an appealing profile difficult) .
Women just message the men they like instead. NEW! Ã... Vine Compilation 2014 Ã...3 min ! Ã... https://www.youtube.com/watch?...
What's the point of going on a dating site and messaging someone if a male doesn't know what a female looks like? Males are 90% visual, females are the exact opposite. Everyone knows this since like middle school or high school. If a chick doesn't want to post a picture, then I would usually skip over her profile, or message her asking for a pic(when I was single). But trust me, if a chick doesn't post her picture, it's either because she has something to hide, or because she thinks, or is not very attractive.
I really think women in the US need to grow some balls (figuratively speaking), when it comes to.. well... life in general for the most part.
There is a French site called AdopteUnMec.com (adopt a guy) that works by being heavily biased towards women :
- free for women, men pay
- women can message any men, men need to ask permission first
- site is marketed like a shopping site where men are considered products, with tongue-in-cheek ads highlighting their features, or offering "sales".
Profiles with pictures are all public though.
It is very successful in France but it failed to gain traction when they tried to export the concept to other countries. Due to their policy they boast a 50-50 men/women ratio and deeper relationships for both sexes.
Too many people here could benefit from having a look at the amount of shit women on dating sites receive.
First of all, yes, women are socialized not to make the first move and to be fucking defensive, and with due reason.
You have no fucking clue about how many of the women around you have been raped, and you have no fucking clue about how it feels like to be objectified every day.
I had no fucking clue myself and could not believe it until I started asking to women who trusted me enough.
My ex gf showed me her OkCupid inbox. It was daunting, outright dehumanizing.
(BTW yes, she does make the first move every now and then.)
I'm wasting a lot of time on OkCupid trying to write to women who are not interested in me or have to sift through huge piles of shit to even find my message anyway, so being able to contact only those women who are actually interested would be an awesome change for me.
BTW, to all the dudebros complaining about being called misogynists: Christie Mack was beaten savagely by her boyfriend and a shitload of people sided with HIM. At least admit that there is a cultural problem.
This is a great idea, and something I've seen being implemented on other female friendly sites, including one that I just tried out in NYC called meshbetter.com. I think overall the move to help women stay safer and less uncomfortable online is impressive & hopefully the trend continues.