Indicted Ex-FIFA Executive Cites Onion Article In Rant Slamming US

schwit1 writes with news that former FIFA Vice President Jack Warner has evidently not heard of The Onion. In a video on his Facebook page, Warner holds up a printout of an Onion story titled “FIFA Frantically Announces 2015 Summer World Cup In United States” and says: “Then I look to see that Fifa has frantically announced, 2015, this year [...] the World Cup, beginning May 27. If FIFA is so bad, why is it that the USA wants to keep the Fifa World Cup?” The next World Cup is not due to be held until 2018 and there have been no games in the U.S.. Warner is facing extradition to the U.S. on corruption charges. Time further reports: Even Sunday wasn't easy, when Warner needed two attempts to get his message across by telling followers that the latest accusations against him stem largely from the U.S. being upset that it did not win the rights to host the 2022 World Cup — which went to Qatar. In an eight-minute Facebook video, which was quickly deleted after numerous news reports picked up on the gaffe, Warner held up a printout of a fictitious story from The Onion bearing the headline: "FIFA Frantically Announces 2015 Summer World Cup In United States." The fake story was published on Wednesday, hours after Warner was indicted in the U.S. and arrested and briefly jailed in Trinidad. Warner asked why the story was "two days before the FIFA election" when Sepp Blatter was re-elected as president.

Comments

meta onion

[Anonymous Coward]

I wonder if The Onion had ever published a story about real life people or new organizations referring to Onion stories as if they were true?

Re:meta onion

[TWX]

I doubt it. The Onion reacts to actual news. It doesn't specifically try to make the news, nor has it ever been particularly self-referential through other reporting. Frankly it doesn't need to, there's enough to parody that navel-gazing would be a hindrance.

Re:meta onion

[myid]

I wonder if The Onion had ever published a story about real life people or new organizations referring to Onion stories as if they were true?

abcnews has such an article. The article includes lots of good links, including a link to the Onion FIFA article.

Re:meta onion

[Cl1mh4224rd]

Not from The Onion, but there's Literally Unbelievable. It's a bit more focused, though, posting funny examples of people on Facebook mistaking Onion articles for real news.

Re:meta onion

[aitikin]

http://literallyunbelievable.o...

Not officially The Onion, but all about it.

Come on!

[aralin]

We all saw this "news" on Sunday in Last Week Tonight with John Oliver. And you got to all this length of stealing the bit and posting it on slashdot just to miss the punchline? Well, for those who have not seen it here it goes:

"Only a FIFA official could be corrupt enough to think the Onion article is not a joke, but something that could actually happen."

Re:Come on!

[phantomfive]

Yeah, that was probably better left off, sorry.

Re:Come on!

[dcw3]

FYI, the FBI doesn't have much of a case.

Oh, you've seen all the evidence? Where can the rest of us see it? Clue: You can't and won't yet.

Re:Come on!

[Plumpaquatsch]

Only a FIFA official

Pretty certain there are some Olympic Games officials that could get there. Some Formula One folks too.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Onion#The_Onion_taken_seriously

Highlights: Fred Phelps from Westboro Baptist Church, MSNBC, Fox Nation, United States Capitol Police, and Congressman John Fleming (R-Louisiana)

So yeah, you don't actually have to be from outside the US to not know The Onion.

Re:Come on!

[king neckbeard]

I think the bigger issue is that a high ranking executive from a multinational sports organization should do more fact-checking than a stay-at-home mom on facebook when making a public statement.

Re:Come on!

[Plumpaquatsch]

I think the bigger issue is that a high ranking executive from a multinational sports organization should do more fact-checking than a stay-at-home mom on facebook when making a public statement.

As opposed to some US Congresscritter or a Fox News Website or the fucking police? Who actually should know something that is virtually unknown outside the US? Hello?

Re:Come on!

[king neckbeard]

Yes, how the hell would a FIFA executive be expected to know about the FIFA World Cup? He literally worked for the most direct source of information. He doesn't have to know that The Onion is satire to ask some of his ex-colleagues to know if a a World Cup is actually happening or not.

Re:Come on!

[Plumpaquatsch]

Yes, how the hell would a FIFA executive be expected to know about the FIFA World Cup? He literally worked for the most direct source of information. He doesn't have to know that The Onion is satire to ask some of his ex-colleagues to know if a a World Cup is actually happening or not.

And again you expect from foreigners what you don't expect from Amercuns. Pure hypocrisy.

Re:Come on!

[king neckbeard]

I expect at least basic fact checking from anybody regardless of their nationality. This goes doubly so for someone fact checking within their own organization. America has a lot of that shit too, and I hate it, but don't defend this piece of shit for trying to defend himself with a claim he could have investigated by calling up any single person in his office.

Re:Come on!

[Threni]

Most people haven't heard of "Last Week Tonight with John Oliver" though.

Re:How is this news for nerds?

[EzInKy]

Mentally disturbed people are unable to recognize sarcasm, and many nerds are affected by mental disturbances. I learned this by watching the "Big Bang Theory".

Re:How is this news for nerds?

[Anonymous Coward]

If you weren't such a liberal racist fucker, you'd know that Warner isn't just some "foreign black man" from the sticks. He's from Trinidad and Tobago which, according to Wikipedia, is "the third richest country by GDP (PPP) per capita in the Americas after United States and Canada. Furthermore it is recognized as a high income economy by the World Bank. Unlike most of the English-speaking Caribbean, the country's economy is primarily industrial,[10] with an emphasis on petroleum and petrochemicals. The country's wealth is mainly attributable to its large reserves and exploitation of oil and natural gas". Also according to Wikipedia, Warner served as TT's Minister of National Security and in Parliament. He's no rube. In fact, its thought that his some of his behavior post arrest, including use of the Onion article in a Facebook video, is a mental incompetence dodge against the corruption charges leveled against him.

Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Taco Cowboy]

This 'onion' issue is but a side-show of the indictment of FIFA officers by the Obama Administration

While everyone knows that FIFA is corrupt, we must also acknowledge the fact that the indictments from US is a kind of a long-stretch, for all I know FIFA does not belong to USA alone

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Adriax]

They claim evidence that the corruption was carried out on US soil using US banks. That's better reasoning to me than "Fifa is multinational and under no one's jurisdiction" as they will claim.

But frankly the fact the US isn't completely obsessed with the sport like some other nations will go a long way to keep things impartial.
If fifa threatens to ban the US from world cup consideration you can expect a very heartfelt "oh darn" as a response and the investigation will continue.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[johanw]

Yes, Kim Dotcom is right in absolutely refusing to do buisiness with any company that has a presence in the US. More should follow this example.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Maritz]

as the commercial circus that the US turns events into would have been a even worse stain on the sport than the current issues.

Worried that the world cup might be a 'commericial circus' are you? Oh I'm sure it'll never happen. Christ.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Anonymous Coward]

By this logic, only a country that plays no sports could possibly have a say... of course, then they'd have no standing either.

The US is the best call here - we don't have an ingrained love of the sport so it's easier to handle it. No one's vote is dependent on us getting or not getting the World Cup - unlike in some soccer mad countries.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Darinbob]

Of course it has jurisdiction if the crime is committed on US territory or using US assets. If, if you electronically rob a bank in the US then you fall under the jurisdiction. Of course if you do that at the direction of another country and refuses to extradite you then you can get away with it.

This FIFA issue isn't about cheating at sports, but about money fraud, bribery, etc. And FIFA is not being charged with any crime, but some of the officers and employees of FIFA. Belonging to a rich club does not always protect you if you commit a crime. The US does have stricter statutes for some of this as well, but any professionally run organization would know this and be smart enough to keep their corruption in countries that look the other way more often.

Sure, the US may be pissed at FIFA for losing their bid, but the US spent a lot of money on this and people aren't going to just sit back and accept the money loss especially when it's been an open secret for so long that FIFA doesn't play fair. You cheat and we lose money then we're going to get pissed about it, old lesson from the wild west.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Anonymous Coward]

It really is impossible for you to write anything without saying that you are Greek, is it?

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[antiperimetaparalogo]

It really is impossible for you to write anything without saying that you are Greek, is it?

Of course it is possible for me to write something without saying that i am Greek.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Anonymous Coward]

It really is impossible for you to write anything without saying that you are Greek, is it?

I'm glad I'm not the only one who has noticed this!
Slashdot really does need a "-1 Annoying Prat" option.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[dcw3]

And that, in short, is the kind of response you would get from 99% of US sports fans...

Just my $.02...as another American, I'd have agreed with you about 30 years ago. But then along came soccer moms, and their kids have grown up, and another generation of kids playing have taken their place. I believe we're now at about 98.5%.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[jeremyp]

Nope he means football, but not the weedy version of rugby played in America by precious little flowers who are so delicate they need to wear helmets and have a breather after every throw of the ball, not the game where 60 minutes of action is padded out to three hours with TV adverts, not the game where being caught cheating gets you a slap on the wrist instead of disqualification.

He's talking about football, the game where use of the feet to control the ball is the rule rather than the exception, where skill and dexterity with the ball are more important than being a meathead capable of barging other meatheads out of the way.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[T.E.D.]

The US is far from impartial. They lost of a bid for the world cup which would have been a massive

US Soccer lost a bid. The US at large doesn't give a shit, and would on the balance prefer to not have their regular traffic/TV coverage messed with over a niche sport only played in the suburbs by children. I'm perhaps exaggerating, but not by much. US Soccer has less political pull in the USA than the Muslim Anti-Defamation league.

To top it off, US Soccer doesn't really care any more either. Yes, they were really sore about losing a bid. But they've lost every bid they made since 1994 (as have nearly all other bidders). There's nothing special about that. The last one was special just because the "winner" made all sorts of "investments" in countries that voted for them, and they happen to be a country that is physically incapable of hosting a World Cup. This is so cartoonishly corrupt, that its clear there's no point bothering to bid if you aren't going to cheat. So US Soccer has essentially washed its hands of FIFA Cup bids. They released a statement over 4 years ago saying US Soccer will no longer be making and Cup hosting bids until the process has been cleaned up.

Now lots of folks internationally are skeptical of this. Surely if you wave enough money under their nose, they will bite, right? That's certainly the theory the rest of FIFA seems to operate under. So far US Soccer has held though. I hope they continue to do so.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[luis_a_espinal]

This 'onion' issue is but a side-show of the indictment of FIFA officers by the Obama Administration

While everyone knows that FIFA is corrupt, we must also acknowledge the fact that the indictments from US is a kind of a long-stretch, for all I know FIFA does not belong to USA alone

The Foreign Corrupt Practices Act of 1977 (FCPA) allows the US to prosecute anyone, anywhere, irregardless of citizenship for specific forms of fraud so long as said person has caused US companies or US-based offices of foreign companies to commit said type of frauds or has used the US banking system to commit said type of frauds. Traffic Sports USA is a company being investigated for that that type of fraud, and so many other businesses tied to either FIFA or CONCACAF.

Now, when I say specific forms of fraud, the law strictly refers to fraud intended to manipulate of foreign politicians or foreign state agencies or to partake in exchange of benefits or gifts with a foreign politician or foreign state agency or representative. The nomination of Qatar for the next World Cup (as a result of a payment under the table to secure those right) falls into that category.

If there were no nationals (or national or US-based business entities) involved at all, then FCPA wouldn't apply at all, and there wouldn't be any news to blather and bloviate about.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[luis_a_espinal]

They claim evidence that the corruption was carried out on US soil using US banks. That's better reasoning to me than "Fifa is multinational and under no one's jurisdiction" as they will claim.

But frankly the fact the US isn't completely obsessed with the sport like some other nations will go a long way to keep things impartial. If fifa threatens to ban the US from world cup consideration you can expect a very heartfelt "oh darn" as a response and the investigation will continue.

By the FCPA, they wouldn't even need to claim that the corruption took place on US soils and/or using US banks. All it takes is either a US national or legal resident, or US company or US-based subsidiary of a foreign company (Traffic Sports USA) to engage in bribery of foreign officials, or be bribed by foreign officials. Bribery and being bribed by foreign officials is the hallmark of FIFA, and that organization pretty much screwed itself up the moment it established links with US companies.

The US is not alone in this. Many developed countries have similar provisions with a global scope (fraud/bribery of this type committed anywhere). A lot more have similar provisions only on a local scope (only those committed locally.)

This FIFA thing is a good thing, but unfortunately the penny arcade crowd is going to tear it down in their endless, nihilistic pursuit for yet another reason to be upset or whatever.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[zerosomething]

Now, you stupid barbarians, you have to learn 2 things:

1) there is a good reason THE WORLD calls real football... "football"

2) there is a good reason THE WORLD use the metric system - "off-topic", i know, but...!

Yank here...1) We don't give a fuck 2) See 1.

Greek here... 1) Because your dicks are smaller when using the Imperial system! 2) See 1.

Which brings us back to the topic of corruption.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Plumpaquatsch]

They claim evidence that the corruption was carried out on US soil using US banks. That's better reasoning to me than "Fifa is multinational and under no one's jurisdiction" as they will claim.

But frankly the fact the US isn't completely obsessed with the sport like some other nations will go a long way to keep things impartial. If fifa threatens to ban the US from world cup consideration you can expect a very heartfelt "oh darn" as a response and the investigation will continue.

By the FCPA, they wouldn't even need to claim that the corruption took place on US soils and/or using US banks. All it takes is either a US national or legal resident, or US company or US-based subsidiary of a foreign company (Traffic Sports USA) to engage in bribery of foreign officials, or be bribed by foreign officials. Bribery and being bribed by foreign officials is the hallmark of FIFA, and that organization pretty much screwed itself up the moment it established links with US companies.

So this is all about the US getting the 1994 World Cup through bribery?

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[T.E.D.]

Easy fix. Coke, McDonalds, VISA, Budweiser and every other US corporation can pull sponsorship, then see how it works out for them. I've also heard UEFA (European Football) is discussing separation from FIFA, so it wouldn't be too much of a stretch to get the Japs and Koreans on-board, ask if Uncle Rupert wants to buy in, and start a whole new organisation. Screw the Russian and Arabs, we don't need their filthy money.

This is actually not too far off from what I've heard talked about. Nearly all the sponsors are US-based, and probably don't want their brands associated with corruption. "Have a Coke, and a dead Qatari migrant worker" doesn't quite have the right ring to it.

Also, Nate Silver did an analysis on UEFA's threat to leave FIFA. While the "western" rule-of-law countries have almost no voting power in FIFA, they have nearly all of the paying viewers. If they left together, UEFA (- Russia) and a few other countries (USA, Japan, S. Korea, Australia, Mexico, and Brazil and Argentina for bonus points), could easily break FIFA. That group there would take about 70% of FIFA's income with them, and 70% of its last round of 16 teams as well.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Trailer Trash]

Now lots of folks internationally are skeptical of this. Surely if you wave enough money under their nose, they will bite, right? That's certainly the theory the rest of FIFA seems to operate under. So far US Soccer has held though. I hope they continue to do so.

There's the other issue that US Soccer doesn't have enough money to wave, anyway.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Applehu Akbar]

The US interest in the FIFA affair is not because of any concern with the healthy development of soccer, but because we get to make an example of a wealthy foreign twirly-mustache organization for the crime of depositing cash in American banks. While our liberals call it "imperialism" when we bomb ISIS to save minority populations from genocide, bullying foreign banks into adopting our insanely complex regulations against dealing in cash is just fine with them.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Anonymous Coward]

2) there is a good reason THE WORLD use the metric system - "off-topic", i know, but...!

There are two types of countries in this world. Those who landed men on the moon and those who use metric.

I jest of course.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[antiperimetaparalogo]

Now, you stupid barbarians, you have to learn 2 things:

1) there is a good reason THE WORLD calls real football... "football"

2) there is a good reason THE WORLD use the metric system - "off-topic", i know, but...!

Yank here...1) We don't give a fuck 2) See 1.

Greek here... 1) Because your dicks are smaller when using the Imperial system! 2) See 1.

Which brings us back to the topic of corruption.

Exactly: it all starts at 0... you have zero corruption until you have some corruption!

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[luis_a_espinal]

... unfortunately the penny arcade crowd is going to tear it down in their endless, nihilistic pursuit for yet another reason to be upset or whatever.

Are we to get some deep meaning from this spew of faux witticism?

We got your reply, what more can we ask?

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[luis_a_espinal]

They claim evidence that the corruption was carried out on US soil using US banks. That's better reasoning to me than "Fifa is multinational and under no one's jurisdiction" as they will claim.

But frankly the fact the US isn't completely obsessed with the sport like some other nations will go a long way to keep things impartial. If fifa threatens to ban the US from world cup consideration you can expect a very heartfelt "oh darn" as a response and the investigation will continue.

By the FCPA, they wouldn't even need to claim that the corruption took place on US soils and/or using US banks. All it takes is either a US national or legal resident, or US company or US-based subsidiary of a foreign company (Traffic Sports USA) to engage in bribery of foreign officials, or be bribed by foreign officials. Bribery and being bribed by foreign officials is the hallmark of FIFA, and that organization pretty much screwed itself up the moment it established links with US companies.

So this is all about the US getting the 1994 World Cup through bribery?

I'll answer in the affirmative to satisfy your supposition.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[T.E.D.]

I was talking about FIFA "waving enough money" under US Soccer's nose. In particular, there had been some noise last year about just giving the US Qatar's World Cup hosting gig, and lately FIFA has been practically begging the US to submit another bid for one of the later cups. Personally, I hope US Soccer sticks to their guns on this, and refuses without reform.

Its not like its really that much money by US standards anyway. The cities that get to host would be spread out all over North America, and the impact for each particular city wouldn't be much more than hosting a large convention, which most of them do all the time anyway. For instance, if Las Vegas was given the opportunity to host a group in the group stage, but they had to give up CES for the year, they'd probably decline.

FIFA really needs the US far more than the US needs FIFA.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[lq_x_pl]

and don't forget: nearly everything else the DOJ is dealing with is positively radioactive.
This is a 'safe' incident over which the DOJ can swing for the bleachers.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Required Snark]

Swiss Leaks: Murky Cash Sheltered by Bank Secrecy

HSBC Private Bank (Suisse) continued to offer services to clients who had been unfavorably named by the United Nations, in court documents and in the media as connected to arms trafficking, blood diamonds and bribery.

HSBC served those close to discredited regimes such as that of former Egyptian president Hosni Mubarak, former Tunisian president Ben Ali and current Syrian ruler Bashar al-Assad.

Clients who held HSBC bank accounts in Switzerland include former and current politicians from Britain, Russia, Ukraine, Georgia, Kenya, Romania, India, Liechtenstein, Mexico, Lebanon, Tunisia, the Democratic Republic of the Congo, Zimbabwe, Rwanda, Paraguay, Djibouti, Senegal, Philippines and Algeria.

The bank repeatedly reassured clients that it would not disclose details of accounts to national authorities, even if evidence suggested that the accounts were undeclared to tax authorities in the client’s home country. Bank employees also discussed with clients a range of measures that would ultimately allow clients to avoid paying taxes in their home countries. This included holding accounts in the name of offshore companies to avoid the European Savings Directive, a 2005 Europe-wide rule aimed at tackling tax evasion through the exchange of bank information.

HSBC files show how Swiss bank helped clients dodge taxes and hide millions

HSBC’s Swiss banking arm helped wealthy customers dodge taxes and conceal millions of dollars of assets, doling out bundles of untraceable cash and advising clients on how to circumvent domestic tax authorities, according to a huge cache of leaked secret bank account files.

Routinely allowed clients to withdraw bricks of cash, often in foreign currencies of little use in Switzerland.

Aggressively marketed schemes likely to enable wealthy clients to avoid European taxes.

Colluded with some clients to conceal undeclared “black” accounts from their domestic tax authorities.

Provided accounts to international criminals, corrupt businessmen and other high-risk individuals.

So not only were they breaking US law, they were breaking EU law and the laws of various European governments, as well as Swiss banking regulations. The clients included members of outlaw regimes, international criminals, and citizens of countries who economies are in crippled in part because of corruption and the siphoning of national treasure by the elites.

So this is a story of international corruption on a massive scale. Nice to know that you are defending the "rights" of drug dealers, despots, crime bosses, dealers in blood diamonds, ...

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Plumpaquatsch]

I was talking about FIFA "waving enough money" under US Soccer's nose. In particular, there had been some noise last year about just giving the US Qatar's World Cup hosting gig, and lately FIFA has been practically begging the US to submit another bid for one of the later cups.

Errm, yeah, that makes sense. Are you already building up a defense? "If we wanted bribes from people who want to host the World Cup, why would we give the US money to host it?"

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Anonymous Coward]

Search:
"site:slashdot.org apk -android"

He's the resident troll here, hasn't been seen in a couple months I think. His schtick is that he thinks that the hosts file is the only way to block malware. Don't take a side on that issue, no one wants to hear anything about it ever again. I don't believe in Great Men, nor do I think you are one, and most people are not going to respond positively to this pseudo-machismo. If there are Great Men then the distinguishing mark is humility.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Applehu Akbar]

Bribery, tax evasion, trafficking and drug dealing are crimes in their own right, and are just as much crimes in other countries as in the US. A prosecutor should be able to marshal evidence against a perpetrator of any of these without resorting to made-up economic crimes like depositing cash into banks. But Congress decided to criminalize banking as a power play to establish the jurisdiction of US law in places where it doesn't belong - you know, imperialism.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[mujadaddy]

His schtick is that he thinks that the hosts file is the only way to block malware.

It's actually more odd than that: he "advocates" an installed program which curates the Hosts file. Seems too complicated for me; I just download a hosts from mvp or whereever.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Nidi62]

Nope he means football, but not the weedy version of rugby played in America by precious little flowers who are so delicate they need to wear helmets and have a breather after every throw of the ball,

Having played both football and rugby at the collegiate level (football on the organized school team, rugby on the school's club team) I exerted way more energy in football than I did rugby. Of course, since I played offensive line, I was essentially in a scrum every play of the game. When I found out you spend half the time in rugby just jogging around I was in heaven.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[dcw3]

Sheesh...no sense of humor today. Get over yourselves mods.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Coren22]

Historically, football was the word for any sport played on foot. It has nothing to do with kicking a ball. It was to distinguish itself from polo and other mounted sports.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[antiperimetaparalogo]

Historically, football was the word for any sport played on foot. It has nothing to do with kicking a ball. It was to distinguish itself from polo and other mounted sports.

Hmmm... do you know a (great) game called handball?

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[phantomfive]

in their endless, nihilistic pursuit for yet another reason to be upset or whatever.

Adequate description of 90% of the internet.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[phantomfive]

... unfortunately the penny arcade crowd is going to tear it down in their endless, nihilistic pursuit for yet another reason to be upset or whatever.

Are we to get some deep meaning from this spew of faux witticism?

Anyone who is tired of being manipulated into being 'outraged' by people trying to make money will find it wise.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[phantomfive]

Interesting posts, thx

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Darinbob]

Soccer has been around awhile in the US, generally something played at most high schools for P.E., even if there were no tournaments or pro leagues. At university there were soccer intramural teams in the 80s as well. It's grown huge over the years because we have lots of immigrants too and you can't shut out the outside world forever. It's also a sensible outdoor team sport which isn't as violent as American football or rugby or with lots of standing around like baseball.

Remember that 100 years ago these "traditional" sports in the US were also relatively new.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[catmistake]

. The US at large doesn't give a shit, and would on the balance prefer to not have their regular traffic/TV coverage messed with over a niche sport only played in the suburbs by children. I'm perhaps exaggerating

Not an exaggeration, but I have some OT points. There is a lot more money in World Cup Soccar than in, say, NFL American Football. Actually, that's an understatement. The coverage of NFL, the professional production ethics, the skill of the techs and producers, and the resulting broadcast makes World Cup look like what it is, really really shitty production. I can't tell you how many matches I've attempted to watch where it seems like the company producing the footage is using like maybe 3 cameras, and switches the audiences' view between them. What ever non-american production company gets that contract to produce the footage to televise soccar games is going to be very well compensated, and subsequently, very rich. Why can't they produce a broadcast that isn't painful to watch?

I submit that all it would take is for an American production team capable of covering NFL in the way we're all now accustomed to get the contract to cover the soccar games for the popularity of soccar in the US to increase. Actually, I think if some American film students got the contract, it would make the World Cup games 1000% more digestable to American audiences... and the international community would shit kittens at the increase in quality of the sports coverege.

Again, OT, or skew to the point of FIFA corruption, its obvious the corruption isn't merely at the top but extends to all business of the World Cup... otherwise, how could ONLY shitty foreign production companies land a contract to cover the richest sport in the world?

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[dcw3]

30 years ago = 80s, so yes we agree. Prior to that, not so much. And http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/B... helped bring attention to the sport in the U.S. Certainly, as we become more Latin, we'll see much more. But, the best thing FIFA could do for itself financially would be to bring the games to the U.S. Thus far, their marketing of it here pales in comparison to that of other sports.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Coren22]

Yes, I have heard the term handball.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/F...

It is even mentioned along side of the etymology of football.

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[antiperimetaparalogo]

Yes, I have heard the term handball.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/F...

It is even mentioned along side of the etymology of football.

O.K., Sir... so based on that (Although the accepted etymology of the word football, or "foot ball", originated in reference to the action of a foot kicking a ball, this may be a false etymology. An alternative explanation has it that the word originally referred to a variety of games in medieval Europe, which were played on foot.) i can still claim that football is a game... "of a foot kicking a ball"! Right?

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[SpankiMonki]

[citation needed]

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Coren22]

As long as you also mention that it may be a false etymology as the article states right there, then proceeds to provide the other etymology.

As both etymologies are given equal weight right next to each other, is it correct to try and claim that what I said was false while utterly ignoring that the foot kicking ball etymology is considered as possibly false, but not the played on foot etymology?

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[SpankiMonki]

It really is impossible for you to write anything without saying that you are Greek, is it?

Of course it is possible for me to write something without saying that i am Greek.

The bigger question is "can you write anything without saying you are Great?"

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[antiperimetaparalogo]

That alternative explanation for the "football" word was interesting - i would not give it "equal weight", but i can not claim it is "false" (since it is very reasonable actually). Now... let's agree like gentlemen that *real* football should involve more *foot* than *hand*!

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[antiperimetaparalogo]

It really is impossible for you to write anything without saying that you are Greek, is it?

Of course it is possible for me to write something without saying that i am Greek.

The bigger question is "can you write anything without saying you are Great?"

Without saying that i am Great? Sure...!

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[T.E.D.]

Wow, you are out of touch together with Nate Silver...

An argument last made famous by Mitt Romney supporters. Not that Nate doesn't get things wrong every now and then, but this kind of blindly dismissive argument against Nate's data-driven analysis has proven in the past to be a really great way to make yourself look foolish.

Speaking of which, guess what happened less than 2 hours after you posted this? :-)

Re:Does US have any real jurisdiction over FIFA?

[Xest]

So are you saying that corrupt Mafia-esque organisations should be free to commit crime on American soil with American money providing they don't actually live in America or leave the country afterwards then or what?

You should be proud that America is the only country that's found the balls to say enough is enough and put an end to Sepp's mafia rather than trying to make it all party politicial and pretending Obama has somehow been bad again. This is a good thing all around, there is nothing bad about what is being done to FIFA. It has been run as a criminal organisation for nearly 20 years, and criminal organisations should be dealt with no matter how popular they are in countless backwater countries.

Re: "This plugin is vulnerable"

[Anonymous Coward]

l33thack0rs.rru/genuineflash

Re:"This plugin is vulnerable"

[Zombie Ryushu]

If you are using FireFox Linux, either use the latest security patch to NPAPI Flash 11.2, I think the latest is 11.2.202.460, or install FreshPlayerPlugin 0.2.4 API Layer and you can use Chromium Pepper Flash 17.0.0.188 in FireFox. This is slightly less stable but can get you better results.

Re:"This plugin is vulnerable"

[stoborrobots]

Go to https://www.youtube.com/html5 and click the "Request the html5 player" button.

Re:How is this news for nerds?

[TWX]

I learned this by watching people get especially butthurt while watching The Big Bang Theory. Lots of people find it hilarious until something they hold dear is lampooned. The biggest complaints came from fans of Babylon 5; the Church of Joe apparently still has its strong adherents...

Re:How is this news for nerds?

[TWX]

When I hear of executives or board members of organizations get the facts about their organizations incorrect, like this gentleman citing a parody article claiming that a wrong-year World Cup has been awarded, it makes me wonder how much of a contribution they really make to the organization internally, versus how much they're just schmoozing third parties externally, if even that. To me such a person looks like an incompetent boob that has managed to land a cushy position that provides well for them, without any real game besides helping themselves.

It's not necessarily fair to expect a highly senior member of an organization to literally know the nuts and bolts of everything that their subordinates know and do, but it's reasonable to expect that they have a handle on the big picture. If they don't have such a handle on the big picture then it looks like they're even more corrupt, simply living the high-life without providing.

US world cup

[bloodhawk]

Is that a US style "world" cup? so that would include a few US states right?

Re:US world cup

[bgarcia]

Is that a US style "world" cup? so that would include a few US states right?

And Canada!!!!

CANADA IS NOT A STATE!!!

Re:US world cup

[msauve]

"CANADA IS NOT A STATE!!!"

Of course it isn't. Canada is a province of the US.

Re:US world cup

[dcw3]

Lack of attendance by the others doesn't make it less "universal".

Re:US world cup

[dcw3]

As an American who's spent a not insignificant portion of his life in the great white north (I also have family there), I don't understand why it is that only Canadians seem to bring this up. Americans have no interest in Canada ever becoming a state. You're our best trading partner, and have a long history of being one of our best allies. Many of us have even accepted hockey, but we draw the line at curling.

Re:US world cup

[rhazz]

I don't understand why it is that only Canadians seem to bring this up

I'm a canadian, and until now I've only ever seen it brought up by people who I presume are american. Also bgarcia's invocation of it is really out of context, so this seems like a pretty bad example to jump on.

Re:US world cup

[painandgreed]

"CANADA IS NOT A STATE!!!" Of course it isn't. Canada is a province of the US.

Better to think of Canada as a collection of US provinces currently tied to a future independent French speaking state.

Re:US world cup

[rnws]

No, no, you're thinking of Britain, a vassal state of the USA since, oh, probably the Suez crisis, and a good little lapdog it's been ever since.

Re:US world cup

[msauve]

Britain? You mean Airstrip One, of course.

Jack Warner

[phantomfive]

Jack Warner was apparently kicked out of office back in 2011, because of corruption. He started his career as a schoolteacher, then later became president of FIFA, I have no idea how.

Re:Jack Warner

[blkhawk]

how? Corruption obviously.

Re:Great satire

[phantomfive]

Frankly it doesn't matter if it's satire or not. It's speech, and each listener should be allowed to judge for himself whether to listen to it or not. And killing someone because you don't like what they say is not acceptable.

Re:How is this news for nerds?

[Paradise Pete]

despite the fact he almost certainly has never heard of it before or had any reason to think it was faked.

So then your notion is that it's perfectly reasonable to believe that a World Cup will suddenly be held starting the very next day. Are the teams frantically packing their bags and rushing to the airport in order to make the opening kickoff?

Just not logical

[Whiteox]

Even if it were true, how can he think that FIFA giving the USA a 'World Cup' could possibly absolve him and other allegedly corrupt officials of the charges? Just that reeks of old 3rd world bribery or the plot of a bad movie circa 1930.
Who gave him the printout in the first place? I doubt strongly that he searched for it, so one of his staff or personal fan handed it to him.
It is a display of gross stupidity for starters and for him to think that the World Cup would start in the US in a few days?
Just goes to show how insular this FIFA vice president is, completely disassociated from reality. On that basis alone, FIFA has no gravitas anymore.

Re:Just not logical

[rtb61]

FIFA is exactly what is was, nothing more and nothing less. An association with representatives from each country managing an 'Sports Advertising' association based around a specific set of rules and over grown children who can accept doing the same thing over and over again. This is turn sponsored by many governments using public funds, not for the benefit of the public but to subsidise 'Sports Advertising' in return for promotion of those politicians who vote in more 'Sports Advertising' subsidise at the public expence (three times, as tax, to be a spectator and to pay for advertising costs on the products they buy). What greater example than Australian, no minister of science but a minister of Sports (advertising, if was about sports it would be about people participating rather than spectating).

So let's drop the fantasy, the whole exercise once it leaves your neighbourhood park where your family can participate for free, is all about idiot egos, greed and corruption. So what is new here,hmm, let me guess who was meant to get to host the next world cup. Still taking into account the charges, they should be doing it a whole lot more often in a whole lot more cases of corrupt get rich quick schemes. So if they achieve prosecution, bloody good job.

Re:International sports are totally corrupt

[gl4ss]

olympics and football world cup has already gone to the level of "whoever wants to take it and do it can have it" - that doesn't stop the bribes though and coincidentally the countries getting the games lately are places where bribes are normal way of doing business so those countries weren't yelling foul over them.

for example jack warner has now provided info/claims how he got bribed - but he doesn't even think of it as a bribe, just as normal. buying votes or getting his votes bought was normal order of business for him.

Re:"This plugin is vulnerable"

[GNious]

You're using a plugin to watch Youtube?!? Why would you want to do that?

Journalism

[Livius]

The Onion may be satirical, but it's fact-checking is about as good as mainstream 'journalists'.

Re:Journalism

[dcw3]

And here on Slashdot, we check your punctuation - get that apostrophe out of there!

He says dashingly. And, don't even try to claim that was on porpoise.

Re:Go figure

[Anne Thwacks]

The Onion is more accurate and more relevant than Fox News.

So is my cat.

Re:f**k the World Cup

[tshawkins]

If you look up the screen, you will see a nice big "back" button, press that, and off you go an play in the next article, and leave the grown ups alone to get on with thier discussion...

It might not interest you, but others are more well rounded individuals, and we can cope with hold a discussion of a corrupt official using youtube ( a technology much loved and loathed by nerds ) to beg for money and display his stupidity.

Re:How is this news for nerds?

[Maritz]

It shows a shocking lack of awareness of how the world works, the kind of awareness you take for granted when talking to another adult.

correct me if i'm wrong

[gTsiros]

but isn't the inability to reckognise blatant sarcasm an indcation of some sort of psychopathy? (schizophrenia?)

Re:correct me if i'm wrong

[cdrudge]

There's been some recent studies that have suggested a link between the inability to detect sarcasm and dementia. Those with disorders that appear somewhere on the autism spectrum also can have difficulties detecting sarcasm, especially in written works or when there are no physical cues to imply sarcasm (a smile, wink, etc).

In Jack Warner's case, I don't think dementia or an ASD is the issue. I think it's just that he's corrupt as hell and grasping for anything at all. He just grabbed a concrete cinder block instead of a lifepreserver.

Re:correct me if i'm wrong

[gTsiros]

yeah you're right i confused it with what sapolsky said in one lecture about schizophrenia, where a person with this condition can not recognize underlying meanings or colloquial speech (eg "raining cats and dogs" to a schizophrenic is exactly what it says on the label.)

Re:How is this news for nerds?

[luis_a_espinal]

"Liberal racist fucker"? It's the LIBERALS that are racists now? LOL.

Oh yes, they can be. Should I provide you with examples? Now, I have no dog in this fight as of who is better or worse, liberals or conservatives. But anyone who thing racism is strictly a non-liberal trait is full of shit.

Re:How is this news for nerds?

[luis_a_espinal]

According to the CIA World Factbook, Trinidad and Tobago has a population of about 1.2 million people, or about the size of Dallas, TX. Not exactly a huge place population wise - only 159th in the World.

But since its quality of development (and the discussion herein) centers in its GDP per capita, it kind of doesn't matter a flying turd if its population is just 1.2 mills, does it?

Re:International sports are totally corrupt

[Plumpaquatsch]

olympics and football world cup has already gone to the level of "whoever wants to take it and do it can have it" - that doesn't stop the bribes though

Yeah, that's why the US held the World Cup once, the Winter Games thrice, and the Summer Games four times. Somebody better look into that.

There have been no games in the U.S.

[Plumpaquatsch]

What's that supposed to mean? That the 1994 World Cup wasn't held in the US?

Re:Part of his arm missing?

[gurps_npc]

You missed something. That's not the his right arm, it's his hand. It is normal for a finger to be attached to a hand.

Zoom in on the picture and you can see that his right arm is down by his side. The elbow is WAY out of frame, it should be close to where the light gray progress bar turns dark gray.

Au contrair

[FreeUser]

Is that a US style "world" cup? so that would include a few US states right?

Not true! We'll probably allow one or two Canadian cities to play along, to give the World Cup(tm American Soccar League) "that international" feel.

Re:Great satire

[3.5 stripes]

Oooh, someone got their sacred cow gored (or in this case, their prophet drawn)..

Scopped by NPR

[Matt.Battey]

So, I heard this story on the radio at 5:45 PM CDT yesterday. Slashdot, you were scooped by NPR. (On bot this story and the one on US Airport Screeners).

a professional attitude

[Max_W]

Jack Warner's job was actaully organizing the World Cups on the ground. For him it is not a joke. Like, as there is a saying in a military: "Who served in the army does not laugh in a circus."

Re:How is this news for nerds?

[Anonymous Coward]

You realize that all of this is extremely whitewashed euphemisms used to describe a country that's essentially an extremely corrupt despotic kleptocracy?

T&T is what happens when organized crime literally runs a country.

Niche?

[edawstwin]

US Soccer lost a bid. The US at large doesn't give a shit, and would on the balance prefer to not have their regular traffic/TV coverage messed with over a niche sport only played in the suburbs by children. I'm perhaps exaggerating, but not by much.

You are exaggerating by "much". 25 million people in the US watched the USA-Portugal match last summer. No fewer than four sports network families available on cable show soccer matches from around the world (and NBC paid $250 million for the rights to just one foreign league for three seasons). And perhaps you've never heard of the MLS? Two expansion teams this year, and three more confirmed in the next three years, and the franchise fees are approaching $100 million for each. I get that most people still watch the other four team sports more than football, but it's hardly, "a niche sport only played in the suburbs by children".

Re:Niche?

[edawstwin]

Thank you for trying to counter a point that I wasn't trying to make, so that I could counter your point. 25M is 4M more than Sunday Night Football, the #1 show in all of prime time, averaged for the season. The game I referenced was in the group stage - not even an elimination game. If the US had reached the World Cup final, the numbers would have been much closer to Super Bowl numbers. And 114M is about a third of the US population, so the US at large doesn't give a shit about that, either.

Re:Niche?

[T.E.D.]

You're preaching to the choir a bit here. I'm a big fan myself. I've been a player since the 70's, and actually have two games (one indoor, one outdoor) scheduled tonight. Tottenham Hotspur supporter (COYS!), but I refuse to support an MLS team until Tulsa has one like we did in the early 80's.

You aren't wrong from a data perspective. In fact, if anything you are underplaying it. Soccer is huge in the immigrant community, and among the young it is actually more popular than Baseball now (and growing). This last World Cup is the first one where I heard some (not all) mainstream sportcasters start to seriously cover it without sneering, so some folks at least have noticed which way the wind is blowing.

However, immigrants and the young don't run the country. Those that do by and large still have a 1980's view of the American sports scene. What I was describing is their perspective. Since the issue in question was political, that's actually more important to the argument that what the actual truth of the situation is.

Personally, I think soccer (one trend now among the snobs is to call it futbol "fuut-bowl") is poised to become a dominant sport in the US. But right now its treated by the general public as if it were lacrosse. Its a leviathan, preparing to surface.

Re:How is this news for nerds?

[phantomfive]

It's rare to find an exec (or person, for that matter) who has every skill. Some are good at negotiating, others are good at motivating underlings. Some have 'vision.' One who knows how to lead a manufacturing firm might be clueless in the hotel industry.

This guy's skill seems to have involved getting good contracts through 'soft skills.' His gullibility to this is reminiscent of 419 eaters.....those who scam fall hardest to scams because of their greed.

Curling

[DarthVain]

The secret to curling is understanding that it isn't really a sport so much as it is a drinking game...

Re:Curling

[dcw3]

In that case I look forward to your lessons.