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PornHub's 'Bangfit' Program Uses Sexy Exercise To Build Muscle (mashable.com)

Posted by BeauHD on from the what-a-time-to-be-alive dept.

An anonymous reader quotes a report from Mashable: A new program created by PornHub called "BangFit" features 'sexercises' that allow players to build and tone muscle. Instead of forcing people to go the gym, Bangfit users simply practice sexual exercises, otherwise known as actual sex. Finally, you can gyrate and hump your way to the body of your dreams. BangFit users follow along with videos as they execute positions like the "squat and thrust" and "missionary press." Players can sync their phones to the workout in order to track their progress and measure the amount of calories burned. While the concept sounds simply gimmicky, BangFit says they designed the app using real science and professionals in the field. PornHub is also retailing an adjustable band that keeps your smartphone closer to to your body, making it easier for the gyroscope to track your movements (judge your performance?). Anytime you complete a level, PornHub congratulates you on your success with a phrase like, "You're the gymanastiest," which is simultaneously rewarding and disgusting. You can watch the retro NSFW introduction video here.

83 comments

  1. This program doesn't include the act in this haiku by TheHaikuLover · · Score: 5, Funny

    His erect penis,
    Plugged inside a man's anus.
    He is a faggot.

  2. Mode of game by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    So glad that there is single player mode.

    1. Re:Mode of game by michelcolman · · Score: 2

      And you can share your score on social media to brag about it, too!

    2. Re:Mode of game by Opportunist · · Score: 4, Funny

      One of those games where holding the speedrun record is probably not really something to brag about.

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    3. Re:Mode of game by michelcolman · · Score: 1

      Sure gives a new meaning to the term "bunnyhopping".

      (Not to mention Object Boosting, Wallclimbing, Peek-a-Portal,...)

    4. Re:Mode of game by tattood · · Score: 1

      I don't know how fit you are going to get doing only 15 seconds of exercise...

      --
      WTB [sig], PST!!!
  3. Soon at the Olympic Games! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Well, maybe we could finally transform ice-skating into this... I mean, we all know everyone wants to see the skaters bang each other like crazy. On skates. We would just need to remove the dressing requirement. Of course that would cause some trouble for advertisers, but then, tattoos of various brands, put on suggestive places...

    1. Re:Soon at the Olympic Games! by PopeRatzo · · Score: 2

      I mean, we all know everyone wants to see the skaters bang each other like crazy.

      Good luck with that.

      Anyway, for sheer entertainment, I think having the Bulgarian weight-lifting team bang each other would be better.

      --
      You are welcome on my lawn.
    2. Re:Soon at the Olympic Games! by Dr_Barnowl · · Score: 1

      I'd pay to see the Italian ladies diving team trying to synchronize their entry.

    3. Re:Soon at the Olympic Games! by Hartree · · Score: 2

      "Anyway, for sheer entertainment, I think having the Bulgarian weight-lifting team bang each other would be better."

      Whatever trips your trigger, Ratzo. Who am I to judge someone else's kink?

      ( ;), for the humor impaired.)

  4. Expands most Slashdotters' workout routines by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

    Most Slashdot users already practice similar workout routines. It's widely believed on Slashdot that jerking off to porn is the best way to burn calories.

    1. Re:Expands most Slashdotters' workout routines by dcw3 · · Score: 5, Funny

      This would result in Slashdotters have one arm that looks like Popeye's, and a core that looks like Whimpy's.

      --
      Just another day in Paradise
    2. Re:Expands most Slashdotters' workout routines by sociocapitalist · · Score: 2

      This would result in Slashdotters have one arm that looks like Popeye's, and a core that looks like Whimpy's.

      Which is different than the current situation how exactly?

      --
      blindly antisocialist = antisocial
    3. Re:Expands most Slashdotters' workout routines by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      Obligatory Family Guy: https://www.youtube.com/watch?...

    4. Re:Expands most Slashdotters' workout routines by zarr · · Score: 1

      I'm ambidexteous, you insensitive clod!

    5. Re:Expands most Slashdotters' workout routines by dcw3 · · Score: 1

      So, we didn't need to know that you go both ways.

      --
      Just another day in Paradise
    6. Re:Expands most Slashdotters' workout routines by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      This would result in Slashdotters have one arm that looks like Popeye's, and a core that looks like Whimpy's.

      I think that the /. crowd ... particularly narcc. would be more like "Ill gladly pay you on tuesday for a hand job today!"

  5. You can watch the retro NSFW introduction video.. by Chrisq · · Score: 1

    You can watch the retro NSFW introduction video here.

    This is one article where I dare not open any of the links at work!

  6. Rule 42 by turkeydance · · Score: 1

    wins again.

    1. Re:Rule 42 by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      All persons more than a mile high to leave the court?

  7. Not to be confused... by HypnoBuddha8997 · · Score: 1

    with Duck Duck Go's !bang feature. You can search specific websites with short powerful commands: http://duckgobang.com./ Use 'em all the time.

    --
    A proven method for uncovering unconscious terrors, repression, self-denial and more: http://criticalstimulus.com
  8. Re:You can watch the retro NSFW introduction video by worf_mo · · Score: 5, Funny

    This is one of the few stories where I expect a lot of people to throw all long-established /. tradition overboard and rush to RTFA.

  9. Laughed all over my keyboard by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

    Designed using professionals in the field.... *snort*

    1. Re:Laughed all over my keyboard by Opportunist · · Score: 1

      So ... I see in your resume... you're a ho?
      No, I'm a fitness expert!

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
  10. Isn't this meant to be a nerdy site for tech by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Why the hell is this site talking about porn hub unless its getting hacked i dont care...

    This site and its admins have fallen to the lowest depths to get views. I dont care about trump, porn hub or anything that isnt tech related. Now delete all these shit posts and give us proper content.

    Anon scrub

  11. Sense of humour by Gaygirlie · · Score: 3, Insightful

    I love Pornhub-folks' sense of humour: they often have hilarious and creative ad-campaigns and posters and whatnot and they seemingly fully condone of the various silly shenanigans the community decides to randomly whip up. I have no need for Pornhub's content myself, but I do like their attitude and I wish more companies were as creative and funny with their marketing -- at least Pornhub's stuff nearly always gets a hearty chuckle out of me, instead of making me go all frownyface and groaning out loud in annoyance like most advertising does!

    1. Re:Sense of humour by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      ....I have no need for Pornhub's content myself...

      Of course you don't .... we all believe you .... don't we guys?

    2. Re: Sense of humour by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1

      You have no need of their service.. but you know a lot about it.

      Hmm.

      Curious.

    3. Re:Sense of humour by michelcolman · · Score: 1

      I must say this advertising campaign is downright genius. It's all over the online newspapers here in Europe.

      And I bet lots of couples will post their scores on social media, too. It's just the right level of acceptable naughtiness.

      I first heard about Pornhub when they launched a viral ad where an old man got a voucher from his grandson. Then there was their campaign to save the whales, and now this. Before all of that, I had never even heard of them.

      Absolutely brilliant.

    4. Re:Sense of humour by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      They are actually funding sports team in Europe!!

      http://www.corrieredellosport.it/news/altri-sport/2016/05/05-11235022/pornhub_sponsor_di_due_italiane_varese_master_team_e_champions_feague/

    5. Re:Sense of humour by EvilAlphonso · · Score: 1

      The parent company (Mindgeek) headquarters are located in the middle of Europe, in Luxembourg, just around the corner from my office :) A former colleague actually works there.

    6. Re:Sense of humour by thegarbz · · Score: 2

      I have no need for Pornhub's content myself

      I have no need for delicious chocolate coated waffles either. That doesn't mean I don't eat one every chance I get. ^_^

    7. Re:Sense of humour by godel_56 · · Score: 1

      I have no need for Pornhub's content myself, but I do like their attitude and I wish more companies were as creative and funny with their marketing . . .

      He just visits the site for the articles.

    8. Re:Sense of humour by iMadeGhostzilla · · Score: 1

      I have no need for Pornhub's content myself

      I love Pornhub-folks' sense of humour: they often have hilarious and creative ad-campaigns

      This reminds me of a newspaper article complaining about erotic movies on a public TV channel's unlisted programming every night at 2AM back in the far more modest mid-80s in a country in the Eastern block. The author went on to say how pornography is bad and damaging for the morals etc. and then he said that at least one positive thing about the channel is they never show hard stuff like multiple men with one woman. The obvious question was, wait a minute, how do you know what they *never* show unless you're up every night at 2AM watching their porn?

    9. Re:Sense of humour by Gaygirlie · · Score: 1

      The obvious question was, wait a minute, how do you know what they *never* show unless you're up every night at 2AM watching their porn?

      Are you just stupid or are you having a particularly bad day or something? There are fucking plenty of opportunities to see their marketing-stuff without ever visiting their website, and their marketing-stuff is obviously not the same thing as the porn-videos themselves on the website. Your comparison just doesn't fly, I wasn't speaking about Pornhub's actual content, I was talking about their marketing-stuff -- two entirely different things.

    10. Re: Sense of humour by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Chocolate covered, ok.

      Chocolate coated? Sign me the fuck up!

  12. Already exists by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Training with Hinako

  13. Best Slashvertisement Ever by wiredog · · Score: 3, Insightful

    EVER!

    Seriously, guys, if you want to slashvertise, this is the way to do it.

    --

    Best Slashdot Co
  14. Re:You can watch the retro NSFW introduction video by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Or WTFA (watch, or w***-off-to rather than read)

  15. Slashdot Advertising Porn? Now I've Seen it All. by EmagGeek · · Score: 1

    Holy shit, I never thought I'd see the day Slashdot turned into just another advertising site for porn. I'd really like to know how much pornhub paid for this.

  16. Why is this on slashdot? by clockley(571021718) · · Score: 2

    What does a exercise routine developed by a porn site have anything to do with tech. If the article show was about a clinical trial examining the claim of the creators or the tech used to develop this rather unusual exercise plan I would understand, only the method of delivery has any relation to tech which is hardly novel to anyone on slashdot. This article is just an attempt the get more people to examin their content.

    1. Re:Why is this on slashdot? by SecurityGuy · · Score: 1

      +1

      I had some initial optimism about the direction our new benevolent overlords were taking, but I'm changing my mind.

    2. Re:Why is this on slashdot? by bickerdyke · · Score: 1

      What does a exercise routine developed by a porn site have anything to do with tech.

      Because it is on that internet-thingie. ...and this is not "news about tech", it is "news for nerds"

      --
      bickerdyke
    3. Re: Why is this on slashdot? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Well, considering the demographic, this is about as "targeted" as advertising gets!

  17. Porn does work as an exercise aid by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I often have porn in the background to watch when working out at home. The thing with a liking for porn, if you have one, is that it can work wonders if you play around with putting useful work in the way: learning the logistics of many backup hard drives, databases and web-tech etc. if you want to have your own personal 'home porn site' connected to your entertainment systems; for exercise, having something physical to do reduces the urge to w***, the exercise is rewarded psychologically by the 'porn pleasure hit' you get, and your liking for porn keeps you coming back to exercise. You can get reasonable inexpensive exercise equipment off Amazon (weights, steppers, bikes, etc), and then a 2hr porn DVD turns into a 2hr workout. Moreover, you learn to be more controlled and disciplined in the face of sexual stimulation, which can work against the misogynistic tendencies that the male sex drive easily promotes, and leaves your sexual curiosity, rather than hungry and frustrated, more akin to being sated after having your face stuffed with McD's, cream cakes and donuts.

  18. Not going to work by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Most people gain weight at a time in their life when they're not fucking a lot, I don't think this will help

    1. Re:Not going to work by Opportunist · · Score: 2

      And the spiral keeps turning, because more lard means less sex, and less sex more lard...

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
  19. Re:You can watch the retro NSFW introduction video by fsagx · · Score: 1

    This is one of the few stories where I expect a lot of people to throw all long-established /. tradition overboard and rush to RTFA.

    I clicked this submission just to see what the App-App-Appers guy will say. Maybe he's not awake yet.

  20. Re:You can watch the retro NSFW introduction video by Big+Hairy+Ian · · Score: 1

    This is one of the few stories where I expect a lot of people to throw all long-established /. tradition overboard and rush to RTFA.

    Hell on this one Iv'e been RTFM since I was 12

    --

    Build a Man a Fire, and He'll Be Warm for a Day. Set a Man on Fire, and He'll Be Warm for the Rest of His Life.

  21. Porn Exercising by freeze128 · · Score: 1

    It's simple. Just go to the website, and PROVIDE US WITH ALL YOUR PERSONAL INFORMATION, INCLUDING EMAIL ADDRESS, AND BEGIN EXERCISING.

    It also shares your progress on social media. Somehow, I don't think this will catch on. Too many slashdotters will not want their moms to know that they are going to PornHub to "exercise".

    1. Re:Porn Exercising by Opportunist · · Score: 2

      OK... let's see....

      Name: Master Bator
      email: wellhungstallion69@male.com ...

      Or did you really think you get anything more sensible than that?

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
  22. Let's get started... by Virtucon · · Score: 1

    "Hey, I'm trying to get myself into shape. In order to do that we need to have countless hours of sex." - Worst pickup line

    --
    Harrison's Postulate - "For every action there is an equal and opposite criticism"
  23. at the intersection of by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    click and 'bate

  24. Bro by 110010001000 · · Score: 1

    Bro, do you EVEN Bangfit?

  25. That was my issue with it - "News for nerds" by aliquis · · Score: 1

    That's my issue with it.

    36 year old (I don't even know how old I am any longer) and still virgin, how is this useful news for me?
    But ok then. Doubt I'll play their version of the single player game though, too much work.

    1. Re:That was my issue with it - "News for nerds" by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Insightful

      I think I see why you're a virgin. Go reread your last sentence.

  26. Re:You can watch the retro NSFW introduction video by Ol+Olsoc · · Score: 1

    This is one of the few stories where I expect a lot of people to throw all long-established /. tradition overboard and rush to RTFA.

    What a wacky site.

    --
    The shepherds did so well protecting the flock that the sheep no longer believed that wolves existed.
  27. I'm surprised... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Not a single "professionals in the field" joke yet...

  28. Re:You can watch the retro NSFW introduction video by Ol+Olsoc · · Score: 2

    I clicked this submission just to see what the App-App-Appers guy will say. Maybe he's not awake yet.

    He's busy at the moment

    Apper Fapper Dingdong Slapper.

    Fappin apps then a nice long nap.

    --
    The shepherds did so well protecting the flock that the sheep no longer believed that wolves existed.
  29. I've got a Canadian girlfriend. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I am very popular with the ladies.

  30. It's click bate by raymorris · · Score: 4, Funny

    Would you call this click bate?

    1. Re:It's click bate by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Oh my god, I just snorted my coffee all over my keyboard. Congratulations, you win the internets.

    2. Re:It's click bate by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      No, it's App-Jacking

  31. Except... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    If I have a partner I can have sex with... why do I need PornHub?

    1. Re:Except... by Opportunist · · Score: 1

      Suggestions?

      Nothing like two people craning their neck in front of a screen and one asking "you think you could even DO that?"

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
  32. Re: This program doesn't include the act in this h by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Hilarious!!

  33. Soon to be renamed by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Strava for porn!

  34. Re: This program doesn't include the act in this h by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    I think you meant CODY!!!, as in Sean Cody.

  35. The text... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Yes folks... You too can build up your wrist muscles with our simple to use sexercise videos. Warning: It's recommended to switch hands periodically to even out muscle tone, unless you use the two handed method.

  36. Not judging at all by KinkyClown · · Score: 1

    "You're the gymanastiest," which is simultaneously rewarding and disgusting.

    Come on Mashup... you watch porn just like the rest of us...

  37. Re: You can watch the retro NSFW introduction vide by TimMD909 · · Score: 2

    And quite literally read the fucking article.

  38. How is this /. news?? by AnontheDestroyer · · Score: 1

    I mean, it's tech news, but not really news for nerds now is it?

    1. Re:How is this /. news?? by Bonker · · Score: 1

      Bangfit's Single Player Mode == 'News for Nerds'.

      You too can improve your arm strength to Hentai. Watch out for those difficult right-to-left switches!

      --
      The next Slashdot story will be ready soon, but subscribers can beat the rush and slashdot the links early!
    2. Re:How is this /. news?? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      I mean, it's tech news, but not really news for nerds now is it?

      If sex doesn't fall under "stuff that matters" - I don't know what does.

  39. Re:This program doesn't include the act in this ha by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Disgusting. Who in their right mind would prefer a filthy manhole over a sweet slippery vagina.

  40. Finally by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    An exercise program I can really get behind! Er, into! No, that doesn't sound right.

    Why does every thumbs up (including the thumbs up itself) suddenly sound dirty?

  41. Re:This program doesn't include the act in this ha by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Of course while you feel that some kinks are unnerving,
    It may be unfair to raise such a cry.
    Consider what others may feel when observing
    Your disk full of tentacle rape hentai.

  42. Re:This program doesn't include the act in this ha by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Holy. Shit. _O_