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User: ozbird

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Comments · 1,546

  1. Re:Ballistic trajectory? on Soyuz Ballistic Re-entry 300 Miles Off Course · · Score: 3, Funny

    Douglas Adams said it best: "The spaceships hung in the air in exactly the same way that bricks don't."

  2. Re:Nostalgia on Lost Infocom Games Discovered · · Score: 1

    You can mod this offtopic, but those 1983 game designers had a real sense of humor and subtly implemented it in 64KB.

    Luxury... I don't think Infocom games made it to the cassette-based 16k TRS-80 platform, but we still had classic adventure games like the Scott Adams series (e.g. "The Count"), and maze adventures (e.g. Asylum.) They don't make them like they used to. :-/

  3. Re:U of Glasgow Made Similar Nano-Switch Progress on UK Scientists Make Transistor One Atom Long, 10 Atoms Wide · · Score: 1
    What's so funny about it?

    Obligatory Isaac Asimov quote:

    The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not 'Eureka!' (I found it!) but 'That's funny ...'
  4. Re:The word "owned" comes to mind on Monster Cables Pushes Around the Wrong Small Company · · Score: 1

    ..go *** themselves..
    Go ass themselves?
    Go sue themselves.
  5. Re:A million times brighter than black? on The Milky Way's Black Hole Is Not So Quiescent · · Score: 3, Informative

    How bright is a million times brighter than black?

    Since it's a million times brighter in X-rays, not much as far as your eye is concerned.

  6. Re:naming on Boeing 787 Dreamliner Delayed Again · · Score: 1

    And I guess the executives who agreed on the name dreamliner are starting to regret their decision...

    They probably regret calling the company "Boeing", too. I recall a comedian making fun of it once (but not their name): "Sounds like something just fell off the airplane: 'Boeing!'"

  7. Re:Wrong guy... on Internet Community Catches a Car Thief · · Score: 1

    Let me guess, he was missing the middle and ring fingers? No wonder the Supreme Metal Council are concerned.

  8. Re:Translation: "nVidia needs a better top manager on Nvidia CEO "Not Afraid" of CPU-GPU Hybrids · · Score: 2, Insightful

    This is a VERY SERIOUS problem for the entire world. There are apparently no people available who have both technical understanding and social sophistication.

    Maybe he was out of chairs?

  9. Re:Why not do another book in the series on New Dune Movie Confirmed · · Score: 1

    3.) Vladimir Harkonnen as the evil bastard he truly was, without the flying crap. Those suspensors were attached to him so that he could move around under his flab.

    Evil, fat bastard...

  10. Ob. Python quote on Creative Backs Down on Vista Driver Debacle · · Score: 1

    "He used... sarcasm. He knew all the tricks, dramatic irony, metaphor, bathos, puns, parody, litotes and... satire. He was vicious." (The Piranha Brothers sketch.)

  11. Air forces on US Cyber Command Reveals Plans To Hit Back At Cyber Threats · · Score: 3, Funny

    Air Force Cyber Command (AFCYBER), a US military unit set up in September 2007 to fight in cyberspace, is due to become fully operational in the autumn under the aegis of the US Eighth Air Force.

    One air force should be enough for any country.

  12. It's a slippery slope... on Concept Computer Based on a Tea Cup Design · · Score: 1

    ... from an iCup "computer" to a Talkie Toaster.

    Unless the iCup can read the tea leaves and predict your future, this must be the worst UI paradigm ever.

  13. Re:Is Microsoft getting desperate? on Upgrade Trick Still Present In Vista SP1 · · Score: 1

    But it is still amazing to see Microsoft to be (seemingly) actually encouraging theft of their product. What will they think of next?

    Fixing it in SP2 once enough people have taken the bait?

  14. Re:Simple on 5.1 Sound Card Delivers 3 Streams of iTunes · · Score: 1

    # USE="-drm" emerge music
  15. Re:Not a secret message. on Blocking Steganosonic Data In Phone Calls · · Score: 1

    Ah! The tobacconist flaps its wings twice.

  16. Re:Do NOT buy Creative Sound Cards on Creative Vista Driver Modder Speaks Out · · Score: 1

    The worse sound card I ever had was an Audigy 2 ZX.

    I have one; no problems at all under Linux and Windows XP.
    I can't say the same for the Asus SupremeFX daughterboard (ADI1988(B?)) that came with my motherboard. Noisy as hell, surround sound rarely worked with games, drivers crashed the computer repeatedly. Absolutely useless.

  17. Re:Tonight we're gonna party... on OOXML Rumored to be Approved, Announcement Wednesday · · Score: 1
    "Hi! I'm Clippy! You look like you're have a party; would you like me to:
    • Vomit on the cat?
    • Photocopy my wiry butt?
    • Wear a traffic cone?
    • Tell everyone: 'I love you guys'?"
  18. Re:uh... on Two Totally Unique Star Systems Discovered · · Score: 5, Funny

    This is Slashdot; April Fool's Day submissions will probably starting appearing around 3 April.

  19. Re:An alternate interpretation on Excavations at Stonehenge May Answer Questions · · Score: 1
    According to an ABC News story I heard this morning, there's a simpler explanation for the bluestone chips:

    "In the early 1900s there were signs in Amesbury (the nearest town to the site) offering the hire of a hammer so that people could come up here to chip off their own bit of bluestone," Darvill [archaeology professor at Bournemouth University] said.
  20. Re:This is getting ridiculous on OOXML Will Pass Amid Massive Irregularities · · Score: 1

    As for swinging committee chairs to your side, here's a pretty good explanation of that process.

    Here's a better explanation of the process. "I suggest a new strategy, ISO: let the monkey boy win."

  21. Re:Evolution on Study Shows Males Commonly Mistake Sexual Intent · · Score: 1

    Putting one in the Whitehouse certainly didn't simplify things.

    It was that, or putting one in charge of a large, monopolistic software company. Oh, wait...

  22. Re:It's raining bullets on China to Use Silver Iodide & Dry Ice to Control the Weather · · Score: 1

    Let me guess, they're "cloud seeding" in Tibet?

  23. Re: ad hominem on Few of OOXML's Flaws Have Been Addressed · · Score: 1

    Another one: this time in India.

  24. Re:LOAD"$",8:LIST on Why OldTech Keeps Kicking · · Score: 1

    The lameness filter abhors punch cards: use more characters, use less junk characters, don't shout, that's an awful long string of characters there (be a shame if anything happened to it) etc.
    I give up!

  25. Re:Disgusting on South African Minister Locks Horns With Microsoft · · Score: 1

    He added: "For innovation to continue, there needs to be value - and even open-source applications have some form of market model, which incentivises them to continue innovating."

    The Open Source model doesn't need "incentivising" - it's perfectly cromulent as it is.