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User: ellem

ellem's activity in the archive.

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  1. Oh just steal Linux already! on Gates Says Windows Reliability Is Greater · · Score: 4, Funny

    For Chris'sake BILL what the fuck is taking so Goddamn long.

    Steal the fucking Linux Kernel slap a Windows sticker on it sue the GPL out of business and give us One OS To Bind (not BIND) Them All already.

    You ripped everything else off, how about ripping off so fucking security?

  2. Re:35 WEEKS? on Microsoft vs. Burst.com · · Score: 2, Insightful

    yeah -- but in email?

  3. 35 WEEKS? on Microsoft vs. Burst.com · · Score: 5, Insightful

    OK 35 minutes, who'd even know?

    35 hours, What? Frigging Veritas... Damnit Bill get them on the phone!

    35 Days, OH THAT IS IT! I want the back up guy fired... jeez fellas we're really sorry

    35 WEEKS? Yes your honor we were trying to pull one over on you....

  4. Install and delete on Divx Now Adware Supported Only · · Score: 1

    Install the codec, delete the adware.

    It's easy.

  5. Quick Change The Name! on Palm Reveals New Name · · Score: 5, Funny

    PHB::According to Johnson's report I see we have market share and brand name recognition. What's our plan?

    JOHNSON::Do nothing sir.

    PHB::Do nothing? You idiot Johnson YOU'RE FIRED! Cravenstone what do you have?

    CRAVENSTONE::Let's change our name sir.

    PHB::Excel-lent....

  6. You May Not Turn Off Your Computer on Techs Discover End Users Aren't So Bright · · Score: 4, Funny

    I have turned off The computer several times and every time I turn it back on it says "You may safely turn off your computer"

    "What does it say next to the power button?"

    "NEC MultiSync"

  7. True Story on The Wireless Wardriving Rig · · Score: 2, Funny

    Got a new IBM Think Pad for work the other day, comes with 802.11b built in. Decided to test out a new VPN client and realized I had "tone" on the wireless. So I checked out how many points I could connect to. Not surprisingly on 7th Ave in NYC there were a lot of point to choose from, and all were unsecured. So I picked on and began working out the kinks of the new VPN Client software.

    About and hour later I am working (though the VPN) with my feet up and the laptop on my lap when i notice some people gesticulating wildly at their window pointing at me! I open my window (5th sotry) and they are yelling at me to get off their network!

    I just closed my shade.

  8. Re:Only in theory... on Growth Job Sector: Freelance Technical Support · · Score: 1

    pfft 20USD?

    I won't even do 20USD for a hot grrl.

    We start a 50USD... remember that.

  9. Windows since 3.11 on Windows XP Edges Out KDE in Usability Test · · Score: 1

    In all honesty I can't find a damn thing in XP without leaning over to my asst admin and going, where is...

    I love that it finally has TAB completion in the CMD (which my asst admin sees as old fashioned) but other than that it is crap.

    Thank GOD I come home to OS X every night.

  10. Hey UNIX for Dummies on Solaris 9 For Dummies · · Score: 1

    was a pretty good book. I don't know which version I bought but it made me the UNIX man I am today....

    hmmm, maybe that isn't the ringing endorsement I thought it would be.

  11. This is SO great on Will Humanoid Robots Take All the Jobs by 2050? · · Score: 1

    Robots will, issue, mail, deposit, post, clear, the nations unemployment checks leaving us all more time to spen the 405USD a week!

  12. The key is parity on Getting Back Into Shape While At The Office? · · Score: 1

    use your left hand at least half the time you use your right hand...

    Of course you'll have to use your left hand for about 3 years now to make up for lost time, but then left hand, right hand.

    This thread is about beating off at work; right?

  13. Seems OW like a OW unlikely OW chain of OW events on Sony Recalls 18,000 VAIO Laptops · · Score: 4, Funny

    I mean OW what are the chances OW of OW doing all those OW things at OW (damnit) OW at the same OW time?

    OW I know OW when I use my OW Sony Viao OW this OW never OW happens! I'm OW using it right nOW.

  14. Re:Violence/TV/Computer and You on Warriors Of Freedom Prompted Rampage Attempt? · · Score: 1

    Oh I agree, although I don't suppose my post made that clear.

    I too am an avid GTA VC player and as of today I haven't gone on even one rampage through a mall killing all those that I would like.

    I think the thing of it is if you have a damaged kid who is already a little nutty, and unlike other cases most people are saying he was nuts, not "quiet", then maybe a game like GTA VC would be a bad thing.

    But how does a gamemaker know that an unbalanced kid is going to play the game? They don't, nor should they be pressed to know that. That's what parents are for.

    Like the Columbine parents massive failure, so too has this father. How did you not know your son had your fucking arsenal of guns and ammo?

  15. Violence/TV/Computer and You on Warriors Of Freedom Prompted Rampage Attempt? · · Score: 1

    here's my tale:

    My extremely well mannered 3 y/o (at the time) son got hooked on Power Rangers at a baby sitter's house where he spent 4 hours a day for a few months before we got him back into Pre School.

    The Power Rangers continued at the house (the Pink one is, after all, really hot; and have you SEEN the villianesses?) The boy was emulating the Power Rangers' moves on the screen, mostly spinning himself to the ground in bizarre death scenes. Then the kicking began. A lot of kicking. A really disconcerting amount of kicking. We took the Power Ranger tapes away and sure enough a few weeks later so did the kicking.

    I can say in this particular case the violence was definitely a manifestation of what he was watching. A quick switch to Bob The Builder and a sparing amount of Sponge Bob Square Pants and now my son is mostly non violent.

    Except for the kid across the street who he beats to a pulp about once a week. But that kid is asking for it.

  16. Update::Servers Have Overheated on Homebrew Rackmount Watercooling · · Score: 5, Funny

    Apparently all 5 gallons of water evaporated due to the Slashdot effect.

  17. I have a solution on Artists Protesting Single-Song Downloads · · Score: 1

    stop writing crap tht no one wants to hear. pretend every album is a Greatest Hits album.

  18. Ouch! on Using Sling Shot Power to Hurl Into Orbit · · Score: 1

    Man when that rubberband finally snaps... that shit is gonna hurt!

  19. My heart says Perl on The Little Coder's Predicament · · Score: 1

    by my brain says Python.

    And the real fact of the matter is kids in the 80s got more involved with computers cracking games than they ever did "programming"

    Yo ho, yo ho -- a Pirate's life for me...

  20. the scheme fails on two points on Executing a Mass Departmental Exodus in the Workplace? · · Score: 1

    1 -- other people involved
    2 -- money involved

    all it takes is one person in the group to wreck this and leaving you standing alone and unemployed

    In any event you don't need your friends to go with you, grow a set and split if it is so bad.

  21. no, seriously on Why Johnny Can't Handwrite · · Score: 1

    where's the foot? how am I supposed to know this is a joke?

    Where's that confounded Waterman?

  22. Re:Online schools are missing the point on Do Online Schools Provide A Quality Education? · · Score: 1

    Your points are well taken for a person of student's age... but for a 30 something professional they mean shit.

    News Flash the only lucid point of college is that worthless piece of paper you get when you leave.

    What they should really do in college is annoy you take 100K USD and hand you a scap of paper with some words on it -- the whole process should take 3 weeks.

  23. Re:How much on Asia Running Out Of IP Addresses · · Score: 1

    98.6%

  24. Godd writing? on Buffy Series Finale Tonight · · Score: 1

    They said words?

    All I ever saw was tight red leather pants!

    and FAITH!!!!!

    and CORDELIA!!!

    EVIL WILLOW

    OH GOD I NEED A MOIST TOWELETTE...

    oh yeah!

  25. Well this is all well and good but... on Announcing Games.slashdot.org · · Score: 1

    when will there be an

    ellem.slashdot.org ? for all the stories rejected from me!