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User: jd2112

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Comments · 1,732

  1. If you wonder why Americans are so violent... on The Chemistry of Firework Displays · · Score: 0, Flamebait

    ...It's because we celebrate the birth of our country buy BLOWING STUFF UP!

  2. Re:Brings back memories on AOL Shuts Down CompuServe · · Score: 1

    You forgot to say "No get off my lawn!"

  3. Symantec NAV on Symantec Exec Warns Against Relying On Free Antivirus · · Score: 2, Funny

    I once wrote a program to allocate every byte of free memory and consume every CPU cycle and I got a cease and desist letter from Symantec. Apparently I was infringing on a patent in NAV...

  4. SQL is to data query languages on Enthusiasts Convene To Say No To SQL, Hash Out New DB Breed · · Score: 2, Insightful

    ...What democracy is to methods of government.

    The worst ever devised excepting everything else that has ever been tried.

  5. Re:Stanley Kubrick on Universal Lands Rights To Asteroids Movie · · Score: 1

    Kubrick already filmed asteroids, although his depiction in 2001: A Space Odyssey, while possibly the most scientifically accurate depiction ever shown in a motion picture, isn't the most entertaining...

  6. Re:Sony, I have a great idea! on Sony Pondering Game/Phone Hybrid · · Score: 1

    More like a PSPhone, which might not be a bad idea.

  7. Re:PETA won't hear of it on Chicken Feathers May Hold Key To Hydrogen Storage · · Score: 2, Insightful

    PETA has only ever said one thing that I agree with: When they wanted Ben & Jerry's to switch to human breast milk they said 'The breast is the best'. However, unlike PETA, I prefer the packaging to the contents...

    This is the same PETA that complained about President Obama killing a fly! What kind of message would it send to Kim Il Jong and Osama Bin Laden and the rest of the worlds baddies if the President had to get his fly trap to humanely catch and release the fly instead of swatting the little bugger...

  8. Re:This will cause trouble... on Iran Tries To Pacify Protesters With Lord of The Rings Marathon · · Score: 1

    I don't want to know about the Iranian version of a pregnant chad.

  9. Re:This will cause trouble... on Iran Tries To Pacify Protesters With Lord of The Rings Marathon · · Score: 1
    Someone in Iran answered the followig Craigslist ad:

    For Sale: Election equipment, used only once, excellent condition. If interested contact the Florida Department of Elections...

  10. Re:A good start... on Norwegian Lawyers Must Stop Chasing File Sharers · · Score: 1
    Go back to? I don't think they ever chased them in the first place, as our legal system clearly isn't nearly as broken as a certain other place...

    If it wasn't broken, would they be chasing file sharers in the first place?

  11. A good start... on Norwegian Lawyers Must Stop Chasing File Sharers · · Score: 2, Funny

    I recommend that the backup alarms be removed from all ambulances in Norway as the lawyers will most likely go back to chasing ambulances...

  12. Re:Stupid and shortsighted on Blimps Monitor Crowds At Sporting Events · · Score: 1
    Just getting a blimp to the site would cost more and require way more advanced planning and advanced notice.

    By chance, in many cases Goodyear or some other company is already sending a blimp to many of these kinds of events. I'm sure they wouldn't mind mounting some equipment on it for a small fee...

  13. Perhaps a better name would be... on BIND 10 Development Now Fully Underway · · Score: 1
    ...BIND Vista

    If the schedule slips the could call it BIND Forever.

    Were talkin a name server here, Most major OS rewrites have been done in less time.

  14. Re:Still waiting on Nokia Developed Wireless Power-Harvesting Phones · · Score: 1

    It's pending that the cures be found safe and effective by the FDA and profitable by the drug companies.

  15. Re:Need More on Nokia Developed Wireless Power-Harvesting Phones · · Score: 5, Funny

    It's called a lightning rod, although a clock tower and a sufficient length of cable will work in a pinch. Figuring out how to get lightning to strike a DeLorian while traveling at 88mph is left as an exercise for the reader.

  16. Oblig. "Liar, Liar" on RIAA Wants To Bar Jammie From Making Objections · · Score: 1
    Lawyer: I object!

    Judge: On what grounds?

    Lawyer: That it's damaging to my case.

  17. Re:What we use on Customer Resource Management For Non-Profits? · · Score: 1

    Our nonprofit uses "Decapitated Poultry v0.01 beta"

    I hear the Federal Reserve is using the Enterprise version to determine the course of action to take in times of financial crisis...

  18. Re:Bing? Seriously? on Microsoft Rebrands Live Search As "Bing" · · Score: 2, Funny

    So what's the new branding going to be after this one fails? Bong?

    Well, it would be popular with the stoner crowd..

  19. Re:All the listeners to right wing broadcasters? on Bitterness To Be Classified As a Mental Illness · · Score: 1

    I sugguest that it be called Limbaugh's Syndrome.

  20. Re:prior art? on Sci-Fi Writers Dream Up Ideas For US Government · · Score: 1

    With any luck it will work about as well as when the military got movie directors to give them ideas on South Park.

  21. Re:Windows 7 price higher than Vista's on Dell Indicates Windows 7 Pricing Will Be Higher · · Score: 1

    Oh I'm so glad I bought Vista and qualify for a free Windows 7 upgrade.Right?

    Not unless you bought it via Tardis Express, the free upgrade program is for copies purchased after June 1 (or July 1, I can't remember which...)

  22. Re:Um, yeah, hai.. on UK Researches Future 10Gbps Broadband Technology · · Score: 1
    I'm from Arkansas. What states are Sweden and Japan in, and what does UK stand for?

    Why, UK stands for University od Kentucky, of course. Don't they have college football in Arkansas? (That's American football for slashdotters in the United Kingom...)

  23. Re:Ah...... on The Dangers of Being Really, Really Tired · · Score: 5, Funny
    Red Bull gives you Wiings.

    Too much Red Bull gives you Wings, And a halo.

  24. Catchier title? on Philip K. Dick's "Flow My Tears" To Be Filmed · · Score: 2, Insightful

    How about "Nowhere Man - The Motion Picture"

  25. Re:Money Grab on NY Bill Proposes Fat Tax On Games, DVDs, Junk Food · · Score: 1

    One irony is that a Wii Fit will (probably) cost more due to this tax.