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  1. It's a beautiful line. on Confessions of an Internet "Shock Jock" · · Score: 1

    I look forward to plaigirizing you in my future conversations. So many people this applies to... :-)

  2. "Pentagon Papers" is the cite you're looking for on Latvian "Robin Hood" Hacker Leaks Bank Details · · Score: 1

    The People have an absolute right to know what their government is doing. There's no other way for a democracy to function. Nefarious governments always try to hide behind "state security" laws. The Heroes who blow the whistle get charged with treason.

    The Textbook US example from 1971 -- The Pentagon Papers

    In brief, at the time the US Government was assuring the public we were about to get out of Vietnam, they were actually planning a massive expansion. Deep Blue Patriot Daniel Ellsburg, a RAND corporation military analyst and Marine officer, handed the evidence of the lie to the New York Times. He was tried for espionage.

    It's too bad we didn't have another man of Ellsburg's character and conviction when Bush was parroting, "Yellowcake, yellowcake."

    Whoever this goofy kid is, I think he might be one of the few geeks who deserve the name "Neo."

  3. It is a hilarious turn of phrase on Confessions of an Internet "Shock Jock" · · Score: 1

    I'm not saying the poster plagiarized Asimov, just that the post reminded me of this old joke the old man wrote, sung to the tune of "Home on the Range:"

    The Clone Song

    By: Isaac Asimov
    Tune: Home On The Range

    Oh, give me a clone
    Of my own flesh and bone
    With its Y chromosome changed to X.
    And after it's grown,
    Then my own little clone
    Will be of the opposite sex.

    Clone, clone of my own,
    With its Y chromosome changed to X.
    And when I'm alone
    With my own little clone
    We will both think of nothing but sex.

    Oh, give me a clone,
    Is my sorrowful moan,
    A clone that is wholly my own.
    And if she's X-X,
    And the feminine sex,
    Oh, what fun we will have when we're prone.

    Clone, clone of my own,
    With its Y chromosome changed to X.
    And when I'm alone
    With my own little clone
    We will both think of nothing but sex.

    My heart's not of stone,
    As I've frequently shone
    When alone with my own little X.
    And after we've dined,
    I am sure we will find
    Better incest then Oedipus Rex.

    Clone, clone of my own,
    With its Y chromosome changed to X.
    And when I'm alone
    With my own little clone
    We will both think of nothing but sex.

    Why should such sex vex,
    Or disturb or perplex,
    Or induce a disparaging tone?
    After all, don't you see,
    Since we're both of us me,
    When we're having sex, I'm alone.

    Clone, clone of my own,
    With its Y chromosome changed to X.
    And when I'm alone
    With my own little clone
    We will both think of nothing but sex.

    And after I'm done
    She will still have her fun,
    For I'll clone myself twice ere I die.
    And this time without fail,
    They'll be both of them male,
    And they'll each ravage her by and by.

    Clone, clone of my own,
    With its Y chromosome changed to X.
    And when I'm alone
    With my own little clone
    We will both think of nothing but sex.

  4. It gets worse. They've been harrassing students on Federal Judge Orders Schools To Stop Laptop Spying · · Score: 4, Informative

    FTFA:

    "...school district employees, including the superintendent, Christopher McGinley, ... making 'loud speaker announcements to all students allegedly commenting on the litigation, making false and untrue accusations [and] disparaging the Plaintiffs.'"

    Who doesn't understand that once the lawyers get involved, you shut the Hell up? What is wrong with these people?

  5. Thank you. on New English/Arabic Translation Site Hopes To Promote Citizen Diplomacy · · Score: 1

    Nice to know I can still write a plot that keeps 'em guessing.

    I thought I knew where you were going, but then you turned 180% on me.

    That's pretty much every woman ever, ain't it? :-)

  6. Does your son carry a DNR on him? on Health Insurance When Leaving the Corporate World? · · Score: 3, Insightful

    I hope your son carries a DNR on him, because that's what a responsible uninsured person would do.

    Your son chooses not to carry insurance. If he has an accident, like say FRACTURING HIS ANKLE, and that fracture throws a bloodclot, which leaves him screaming in frantic pleading agony for a while before he passes out from the pain, then some spendthrift schmuck might call 911 and get him an ambulance.

    Have you priced an ambulance ride followed by ER treatment lately? The last time one of MY INSURED and therefore RESPONSIBLE children ended up in the ER -- no ambulance ride mind you -- two hours of occassional treatment, a grand total of 10 minutes with a doctor, came to more than $3,000, paid for by my money.

    But your clumsy, irresponsible blood-clot-throwin' welfare-queen son, just racked up at least 10, probably more like 20 grand of debt. You know what he's gonna do? He gonna declare bankruptcy and stiff that hospital on that bill, cause twenty-something kids who can't find a real job don't have 20 grand laying around. Then MY TAXES, MY MONEY are gonna get pulled in to cover the slack because your boy doesn't want to get up and go to work in the morning.

    So, if he wants to redeem himself and stay responsible, he can at least carry a DNR rejecting care and demanding that the ER doc let him die screaming and solvent.

    Wake the hell up, man. You're too old to keep buying this crap. Your twenty-year-old kid didn't wisely negotiate medical care with the hospital and force them to alter their billing practices. He was the recipient of some form of charity, but you're too thick-headed and vain to admit it to yourself.

    And I'm glad he was. I'm glad he got the care he needed, and I don't mind that some of my taxes probably went to pay for it. I don't mind my taxes paying for your boy because one, I've got a working heart, and two, I understand the health of the herd affects my health too. A sick cow in a healthy herd will eventually make the whole herd sick, so I don't mind keeping your boy in good health, because in doing so I deny sickness a place to take hold in the herd I live in.

    Let me put that in plainer terms for the benefit of the slow. If the busboy at your restaurant is sick, then you're about to be.

    But hey, John, as someone right there beside you, let me tell you about your health. You ain't as young as you used to be, and you can feel it. You wake up slower in the morning, but you don't sleep as well. Stuff breaks, and it takes longer to fix. Trying to stay in shape gets harder and harder, and no matter how hard you work, you're still losing ground. You don't quite hear as well as you used to, but no one notices it yet. You ain't seeing quite as good, but you ain't gonna let on. You've had that scary moment when you couldn't quite catch your breath, even when you know you should have already.

    We ain't even gonna talk about your prostate yet, are we? :-)

    We're playing a good game, we got everyone fooled, but we get the scent in the wind. Dying ain't a theoretical possibility like it was when we was 17. Well, we think we got everyone fooled. Our wives know it. Well, mine does at least. Why do I get the feeling you're divorced?

    Cancer. Heart attack. Diabetes. Stroke. That's what you and I got to look forward to John, and it's as scary as hell, looking down the barrel of words like that. Diapers and Dentures will eventually get us all.

    Ain't it time we put down the macho bullshit and see if we can't take care of our kids yet? Two or three more decades, you and I are both gonna be gone, but our kids will still be here. Ain't it time we find a way to give them the same level of care we'd give to THE DAMN ANIMALS IN THE BARN?!

  7. "stop killing our ham radio operators" on NGO Networks In Haiti Cause Problems For ISPs · · Score: 1

    Link to incident you're talking about, please?

  8. claim was made by the kid. And he might be lying on School Spying Scandal Gets Even More Bizarre · · Score: 1

    Oh, yes, the incredible unlikelihood that a boy might be eating candy instead of illicit drugs. You should never trust what a child tells you.

    You know, Jeff, I'm old and wrinkly and a Dad now, but I too was a boy once. Grown-ups like you made my life miserable. You're the villain of every Stephen King novel ever.

    On behalf of the Peter Pan Nation, Bite me, OK?

  9. Actually, it's a growing problem on Health Insurance When Leaving the Corporate World? · · Score: 1

    Same thing happened to a buddy of mine. When his kid was born, he called the insurance company as directed by HR. They call center rep told him, "Congratulations, we just need you to send us the birth certificate and his new SSN. Call us back when you get it."

    He did. He then got a letter a couple of months later from HR informing him that because he did not add his child to the plan immediately, the baby would have to wait a year for the next enrollment period. In addition, since his child was not covered by insurance, they were not going to cover the baby's hospital bills. He had to get a new job to get his kid insurance. It was an incredibly stupid move on the part of the company too, since he took paying customers with him.

    Another guy I know had the insurance company demand proof that the child was actually a dependant. Huh? Naturally confused, he called the number. The CSR told him he had to submit proof this was a "legitimate dependant."

    "What, you mean like a DNA test?"
    "The proof is your responsibility."

    That one finally got straightened out, but you'd be amazed at the weasel tricks the insurance companies will go to these days to avoid their legitimate responsibilities.

  10. And so began WWIII... on New English/Arabic Translation Site Hopes To Promote Citizen Diplomacy · · Score: 1

    ...when their men spoke directly to our women. In a blinding display, the new "51% Voting Block" party was formed, the Constitution amended to allow the foreign-born to become president, President Obama impeached and thrown from office, and New Zealand actress Lucy Lawless voted in as president.

    The nukes were launched less than five minutes later.

  11. That's good to hear on Delicious Details of Open Source Court Victory · · Score: 1

    Glad to hear it. Thank Heaven for small favors.

  12. what are you going to do about it? on Delicious Details of Open Source Court Victory · · Score: 4, Interesting

    With respect, I'm not a cynical college kid who just discovered nihilism, Bruce. I have children, so I fear for the future. I speak. I write. I vote. I'm up for anything short of flying a plane into a building. You got a hill you wanna take, General Perens, I'll be there.

    I began my life as a homeless kid. I've had a miraculous outcome, built a life against all reasonable expectation; college, wife, kids. But as good as my life is -- and it is good -- I am embattled on all sides. I am fighting the good fight -- and I will proudly go down fighting the good fight -- but I can see the battlefield.

    I paid for my own education. I went into a lucrative, practical, growing field. I have watched salaries and opportunities plummet. I know that chances are good I'll be declared too old to hire before my hair even goes grey. Looking back, I would have been better off skipping college and becoming a plumber.

    There is a medical issue that has wiped out my family's finances. I have insurance. Insurance has been worse than useless. There are databases filled with other families in the exact same trap. We make a lot of noise, but we're not making much progress.

    I'm lucky. My kids' school is filled with idealistic teachers doing all they can. The problem is they're doing all they can with the proceeds of a can recycling drive. They're gonna go down fighting the good fight too, and gallows humor pervades the place.

    For the first time ever last year, I saw a financial analysis that argued college was not worth it, especially if you had to pay for it yourself. Worse still, I couldn't refute it. What path do I offer my children when even education is a losing proposition?

    I've traveled. I've seen the Third World. I know where we're heading. I'm desperately hoping my fellow citizens can quit hitting the Fox News crack pipe long enough to notice our city bus just went off a cliff.

    What am I doing about it, Bruce? I'm standing on the walls of the Alamo, firing steady and sharpening my Bowie knife. I'm hoping in the future fat tourists in cotton shorts come to gawk at my heroic remains. I'm hoping my stand here gives General Houston time to run. Gregory Bloody Peck better play me in the movie.

    But I'm pretty sure I know how this chapter's gonna end. And like I said, I'm a man with kids. So I'm OK with that.
     

  13. "someone ... can so completely snow a court" on Delicious Details of Open Source Court Victory · · Score: 5, Interesting

    (I'd like to deeply, deeply apologize to Perens, Jacobsen and all the other People of Virtue who worked on this case for the wet blanket I'm about to throw. God knows you all deserve better.

    I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, and here goes...)

    You should never attribute to malice what can adequately be explained by stupidity.

    But no Court is this stupid. At some point you have to concede the problem is corruption.

    Katzer's outright theft is painfully obvious. It took $30,000 up front and five years of legal wrangling. WORLD CLASS MINDS had to engage on the side of the good guys. Look at the outcome.

    $100,000 over 18 months and future disputes are sent to arbitration.

    $100,000 does not even begin to cover the legal costs of the angels here. If the good guy attorneys hadn't been working pro bono, our Hero would still be in ruinous debt. If not for the amazing charity in this case, Jacobsen's victory would be declaring bankruptcy. $100,000 probably doesn't even put a chip in the profits Katzer made by his theft. $100,000 isn't even $100,000 since it's being paid over time, which means the real net present value is less.

    Worse, "Both parties have agreed to ... arbitration." Do some googling on modern arbitration. It's so blatantly rigged you can't even properly call it a fraud. Corporate interest prevail over the little guys in something like 98% of all cases, and the remaining two percent get such token amounts you can't legitimately call it a "win." Katzer is free to pull some heinous new stunt tomorrow -- like filing entirely new patents claiming ownership of Jacobsen's work -- and he can remain comfortable in the knowledge that he has a 98% chance of getting away with it.

    "Aw, shut the Hell up, man. We got the precedent and that's what really counts."

    Really? A precedent that costs $30,000 up front to try to use?

    "Dude, seriously, STFU. We're making incremental progress towards a larger victory here. FOSS is gaining legitimacy in the legal world, and that's what really matters."

    I know. I've been hearing that for 20 years now. After twenty years of gaining legitimacy, it still only takes five years, two appeals and a team of pro bono attorneys to recover a token amount of somewhat less than $100K and a decision that all future disputes will be resolved in the favor of the bad guys. We're making wonderful progress. A few more such victories and we'll be lost.

    "Frackin' Hell, man, what the frack is your problem?!"

    My problem is that I want everyone else to come to the same excruciating conclusion I have. The System has a horrible bias in favor of the rich and powerful. The System will go out of its way to screw the weak and defenseless. That by Bruce's own admission, the System will take a tool like SLAPP, expressly designed to level the playing field, and use it to deny justice to those not rich enough to afford it. If Jacobsen hadn't had an extra $30,000 laying around, this case would have been over before it began.

    Justice is no longer blindly weighing merits, but is instead whoring herself out to the highest bidder. I want to change that, and we can change that when enough of my fellow citizens begin to understand just how corrupt things have become.

    But wearing rose-colored lenses and seeing this as a "victory" doesn't help us. Jacobsen and company had to wage a heroic, epic battle for a very. very tepid victory. The real costs of his case weren't covered, he hasn't been made whole for the time he lost, Katzer kept his profits and is still out there free to start stealing again tomorrow.

    We shouldn't be celebrating this outcome. It doesn't vindicate the Courts.

    It indicts them.

    (And again, my sincerest apologies and deepest thanks to the wonderful people who fought this fight.)

  14. "While it's not the best for him" on PA School Defends Web-Cam Spying As Security Measure, Denies Misuse · · Score: 1

    Why on Earth would you think handing this student and his family a large sum of money would not be the best thing for him? Are you afraid it would promote laziness?

    When I was young, I was admitted to colleges I could not afford to go to. My life turned out wonderful anyway, but to this day, I still wonder what might have been. I could have gotten a much better education and avoided years of drudgery.

  15. Why was this not tattooed on my forehead at birth? on Perth Game Company CEO Takes IP By Night · · Score: 1

    "Loyalty is paid for in cash."

    Ye Gods, where the hell are my mod points? Why doesn't Slashdot have a "+6 Speaking God's Own Truth" rating? If only I had been raised with that Wisdom, rather than the "Screw-me-now, Screw-me-hard, Screw-me-again-later" "the-Boss-may-not-always-be-right-but-he's-still-the-boss-you-should-always-do-your-very-best" nonsense, it would have saved me untold misery.

    Our leaders are forcing us all to become mercenary bastards. And my nation is poorer for it.

    To my good friends in Australia, speaking on behalf of the U.S., if you ever catch this schmuck, we'd be honored if you'd let us pay for the rope.

  16. OK, now I know you're a shill on Mozilla Debates Whether To Trust Chinese CA · · Score: 1

    "was bad and a very grave mistake by the Chinese government"

    3000 dead students is not a "mistake." It definitely qualifies as a massacre.

    And yes, the world remembers.

  17. I guarantee the sensor works 100% on iPhone's Liquid Sensors Can Be Triggered By Wintertime Use · · Score: 2, Insightful

    The purpose of the sensor is not to detect water. The purpose of the sensor is to give Apple and the insurance company a technical strawman to point to as to why you're not gonna get the warranty replacement you've morally and legally got coming.

    "We're not honoring the warranty because the machine says you've been bad," sounds sbetter than "We don't wanna honor your warranty 'cause that would cost us money to live up to our obligations."

    It's the same function polygraphs, e-meters and other "lie detectors" serve. They're technically nonsense, but they give the organization an excuse you can't refute since it's nonsense in the first place.

  18. Quit going to WalMart Optical on The Blind Shall See Again, But When? · · Score: 1

    Damn, dude, you seriously need a new optometrist.

  19. Johnny Depp, Tobey Maguire, Gerard Butler on Researchers Say Women Secretly Desire Hairy Geeks · · Score: 1

    Look at the article. These women mean they like scruffy, geeky traits on Johnny Depp, Tobey Maguire, Gerard Butler and David Beckham.

    So if you look like any of those four guys, you're in luck.

    Although, actually, Tobey Maguire didn't get the girl until she found out he had superpowers too.

    So OK, if you look like Johnny Depp, Gerard Butler or David Beckham, OR you actually are a superhero, then you're in luck.

  20. Apparently so independently on Mozilla Debates Whether To Trust Chinese CA · · Score: 1

    That mere things facts and reality don't have any influence on you.

  21. "Having customers die ..." on Swiss Prostitutes Trained To Use Defibrillators · · Score: 2, Insightful

    "Having customers die on us isn't exactly good publicity."

    Really? I would think it would be GREAT publicity.

  22. On Slashdot on Looking Back From the 1980s At Computers In Education · · Score: 2, Funny

    It's generally sex by way of computing...

  23. So which is it? on Mozilla Debates Whether To Trust Chinese CA · · Score: 1

    Are you just too young and stupid to remember this Major Event of the 20th Century, or a shill for the Chinese Government?

  24. Yes, CNN covered it live. on Mozilla Debates Whether To Trust Chinese CA · · Score: 1

    CNN

    "For CNN, it all started in early April when Alec Miran, CNN's special events producer for the Gorbachev visit, went to Beijing to propose an "outlandish idea" to the Chinese authorities -- bringing in the network's own transmission equipment to beam live television pictures from China.

    "It was unprecedented," said Miran. Before that, networks would feed their material from CCTV (Chinese Central Television), who would monitor -- and censor -- everything that was sent out.

    "Our own transmission was a scary idea to them," said Miran. But he says he thinks the Chinese eventually agreed -- after much back and forth -- because, above all, they wanted international coverage of Gorbachev's visit.

    The Chinese gave CNN permission to bring in their own "flyaway" satellite dish and additional microwave gear to be able to transmit live -- a permission unheard of at the time in closed, Communist China. CNN was granted exactly one week's permission, timed to coincide with the Soviet leader's visit."

  25. Oh, and By the Way... on Mozilla Debates Whether To Trust Chinese CA · · Score: 0

    ...those three thousand kids who died literally fighting for Democracy? As far as I'm concerned, that MAKES them Americans.