User: Fecal Troll Matter

Interesting.

On: China to Promote Own Alternative to DVDs, EVD

Please, tell me more.

DO NOT CLICK LINK GROSS

On: Brazil Moves Away From Microsoft

OMG DO NOT CLICK TAHT LNK PPL!!!!!!!!1111111 MODS PLS REMOEV THIS PSOT THIS GUY IS A TROL

asddf

Second post.

On: The Ultimate Desk... Sort Of

I think you meant "buy".

We have us a winner

On: Earth's Asteroid Risk Downgraded

Quality.

I feel blessed to have read that.
Thank you.
Now please remove the AC mask and show us our new hero.

I just heard some happy news on talk radio...

On: Home Directory In CVS

The short lived pimply faced coalition of asexual preteens, the self proclaimed "GNNA" has been officially disbanded. Upon receiving the news, Hemos was comforted by a close-knit circle of family and friends as CmdrTaco and Michael held an all-night drunken homosexual fuck-fest. Even if you weren't aware of the GNNA, (which most of us aren't) their contributions to the Slashdot community truly prove them as shitheads.

Re:Spock's discovery

On: What Critics of the Critics of the FCC Rule Miss

Hi. I haven't seen you around before. Wanna play?

Good news, you've been granted a first post!

On: Linux-Based Musical Keyboard Workstation Debuts

Glad I haven't seen those self-proclaimed 'gay niggers' around recently. I haven't forgotten to pay my licensing fee, but thank you for the friendly reminder! Do you want to go out with me?

This just in:

On: The Ten Most Overpaid Jobs In The U.S.

Woman sues after finding condom in clam chowder. Waiter apparently thought she asked for "man chowder".

A wiser fella than myself once said:

On: Nokia Taking Over Psion to Control Symbian?

Sometimes you eat the bar and sometimes, the bar, well, he eats you.

First Toast Post

On: Rubik's Cube Comeback

I like my toast with cinnamon, sugar, and old glory, the yankee swastika.

This just in [this is not a troll (for once)]

On: SCO Will Pay You Not to Use Linux

I just heard some sad news on talk radio. Legendary horror novelist Stephen King whose nom de plume had been Richard Bachman, died this evening of complications during surgery. King had been scheduled to receive routine treatment for an enlarged prostate, when something went awry. There weren't anymore details. Even if you weren't a fan of his work, King's brilliance and contributions to pop culture mark him as a true American icon.

Re:Those ads were heinously annoying

On: FTC Shuts Down Pop-Up Extortion Firm

sirhaxalot, if you could not figure out a way to stop that annoying nonsense, you sir, suck goat balls.

I removed it from a friend's computer in less than 5minutes.

Your ideas intrigue me and

On: Putting Novell's SuSE Purchase In Perspective

I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

I'm a Liberal.

On: LinuxAnt's DriverLoader Loads Centrino Drivers

I cried when they shot John Lennon
Tears ran down my spine
And I cried when I saw "JFK"
As though I'd lost a father of mine
But Malcolm X and Ice-T had it coming
They got what they asked for this time

CHORUS
So love me, love me, love me
I'm a liberal

I go to pro-choice rallies
Recycle my cans and jars
I'll honk if you love the Dead
Hope those funny grunge bands become stars
But don't talk about revolution
That's going a little bit too far

CHORUS

I cheered when Clinton was chosen
My faith in the system reborn
I'll do anything to save our schools
If my taxes ain't too much more
And I love blacks and gays and Latinos
As long as they don't move next door

CHORUS

Rush Limbaugh and the L.A.P.D.
Should all hang their heads in shame
I can't understand where they're at
Arsenio should set them straight
But if Neigborhood Watch doesn't know you
I hope the cops take your name

CHORUS

Yeh, I read the New Republic(an)
Rolling Stone and Mother Jones too
If I vote it's a Democrat
With a sensible economy view
But when it comes to terrorist Arabs
There's no one more red, white and blue

CHORUS

Once I was young and had an attitude
Stickers covered the car I drove in
Even went on some direct actions
When there weren't rent-a-cops to be seen
Ah, but now I've grown older and wiser
And that's why I'm turning you in

CHORUS

Re:ATTN: Webmaster of goatse.cx/hick.org

On: Trouble Getting to SpamCop?

I myself enjoy the pleasant surprise of a carved orange goatse guy. I would have been even more excited if The Giver were altered for the holiday as well. Oh well, there's always next year!

FTM vs. CowboyNeal in the making

On: Alien vs. Predator Movie Trailer Available

I heard there's gonna be some pretty gory sexually deviant sodomy scenes.

I agree with this post.

On: Motorola Launches A760 Linux and Java Smartphone

Have you seen this recent change?

It would be funny if

On: SCO Madness Reigns Supreme

you logged in.

If you read this, you will die.

On: Red vs Blue Sweeps Machinima Awards

What the fuck were you thinking man?

You suck.

On: Can Watermarking Help Find GPL Violations?

Any questions?

help please

On: Amazon's Book Search Hits a Snag

i kno that ur a good hacker and i want some1 to help me lern 2 hack. i need to hack this b*tch's hotmail acct pls do it for me and teach me how to hack ill pay u.

Spammers = FREE FUCKING SPEECH

On: Californian Court Fines Spammers $2 Million

No, that orc would only be reamed by pre-pubescent pimply slashdotting geek-fags.

Re:BASH FP

On: Study on the Effects of Spam on End Users

It's about time someone came forward to address this vile plague.

Best of luck to you and your cause.

THERE IS A BOMB IN THIS POST!

On: Paying for Apple iTunes with PayPal

Please don't reply!!-You might set it off!!-My life is on the line!!

I vote first poost.

On: Observer Pans Touchscreen Voting Test

i poo out my ass. such marvelous gas! i poo poo poo poo poo poo poo out my ass!