My "stupid journal," which is actually a bastion of facts, is not on trial here. The man who is on trial, Michael Sims, is due to be tarred and feathered soon.
Instead, you should be rating my comments. My comments are Informative and Insightful, and I deserve all the praise you schmucks can throw at me.
He never could've outfought Linux. But I didn't know until this day that it was Microsoft all along.
That's a good quote, but you misspelled "Micro$haft." As a famous cybersecurity researcher, I am privy to some advanced name-calling methods that you commoners just don't have.
I refuse to support Ogg until its streaming component adequately supports the Evil Bit. Slashdot has given this so-called "Evil Bit" RFC a little lip service in the past, but I think it's high time we brought it out into the open.
As a famous cybersecurity activist, I've had the honor of dinnering with Segway inventor Dean Kamen on numerous occasions. I have found him to be witty, insightful, and above all generous. On 15th March 2003, Dean Kamen presented me with the Segway Human Transporter, and I've been using one ever since.
I haven't experienced a physical sensation that is even half as stimulating as riding a Segway. It is a rush, a thrill ride, and comparable to having a bolt of lightning wedged up a lion's arse in one's trousers.
I highly recommend that you buy one. Please click here to visit Amazon.com and buy one today. Tell them that Seth Finklestein sent you, and you qualify for free shipping on all orders over $25.
I'm familiar with Arcosanti, or "Arcology" as it is called in English. From my extensive scientific research, an Arcosanti is a large dome-like community which can only be built -- at great expense -- when a city reaches a certain level of population. It thrives as a city within a city until it is fully developed, at which time it blasts off into space, never to be seen again. I remember when I
(The rest of this post is available only to Slashdot readers who have subscribed and chosen the "Seth Finklestein Plus!" option. Click here to subscribe today.)
As a famous cybersecurity activist, I feel that I am highly qualified to critique the ideas of these so-called "Car-Free Cities." It's an extension of my earlier work, called "Michael Sims-free Cities."
As a famous cybersecurity activist, I have access to highly sophisticated simulation tools. In one of these tools, which I call "Simple City 3000," roads are represented by small grid tiles which resemble pavement (or as you Americans call it, "asphalt") in appearance. Each one costs $10, but here's the kicker: each year, an upkeep cost of $1 is required. That means that in a small city with 1000 tiles of roads, $1,000 is needed just for road maintenance. In larger cities like the one I downloaded from the web yesterday, more than $50,000 is needed just to maintain the roads.
In conclusion, roads are not the answer. Proper mass transportation can save a large city upwards of $30,000 per year.
I demand that you tell me who started those rumors. Please post his full name, address, phone number, and most importantly, e-mail address. I'll deal with him.
On second thought, I'm just going to assume that it was Michael Sims. Watch out! I'm coming for you, Michael!
Your work machine is behind a firewall. You're visiting a client. The client has its own firewall. You need to access your work machine's desktop. What do you do? What do you do?
While you're hacking together 150-character command lines, I'll be making money off of GoToMyPC.com, the product that I created with my own two hands.
As a famous computer hacker, I can tell you that your so-called "mysql" syntax is wrong. Instead, it should be: mysql> select a,b from table where b like "*patent*"; Thank you.
What the fuck is a '%' search? Searching for a percentage? I've been using computers since the '80s (that's right, I said *'80s*) and I've never used % ever.
Here's an example. C:\> dir *.* (prints lots of files) C:\> dir %.% dir: NO FILES FOUND
According to Google News, even this retard's babbling counts as "news." See?
I think Google News needs to filter their sources list down. Otherwise, it will become just as useless as Froogle, which provides links to many web pages which are not in fact stores.
Frankly, I'm surprised that Slashdot didn't come to me, internationally known cybersecurity activist Seth Finklestein, for advice on the matter. I have been abused like a tattered rag doll by Slashdot's own editor, Michael Sims.
Ever since Michael Sims' message "The Censorware Project is Closed," I have been kept awake at night by persistent phone calls and very loud e-mails sent by Michael. Mr. Sims has called me, my wife, my five internationally acclaimed children, and even my wife with vague threats against me.
I did absolutely nothing wrong at any point in my life. I am a shining beacon in a godless, hateful world. Please help me. I'm a victim.
Listen, fucktard. These fucktards at the fucktard store are charging nineteen fucking dollars for a CD containing 37 minutes of really awful music by a fucktard named Justin Timberlake.
Frankly, a child who doesn't like the same music as me isn't just a loser. He's a fucktard loser.
As all of you are aware, Michael Sims is the Jerry Falwell of the 21st Century. He stole away my award winning project, the Censorware project, in what can only be called the crime of the century. (Do revisit, I've added many updates.)
Sex.com is a pitiful excuse for a "hijacking." I implore you, Slashdot, do a story about Michael Sims taking away a web site that is far more enticing than any "Sex" site.
You know, I was just talking about this over coffee with my good friend Bill Brown. He runs a tour of New York's security cameras, so that protesters such as myself can easily point out the cameras and mock them. I've been going on this tour every week with Dr. Brown, and every time he has even more incisive insights.
As a very famous cybersecurity researcher, I feel that I am highly qualified to talk about Homeland Security. My deep knowledge of computers -- which came with no formal training, just my own intelligence -- can easily be applied to solving real-world security problems. My award-winning research has led to landmark decisions in the field of security.
I have the right to control every aspect of my identity, both in "interspace" and in "meat-space." When someone takes a picture of me in the real world, I have every right to walk up to that person and shout at them until they agree to delete the picture from their "mini-hard drive card" or burn the film in front of me. I know that most of you don't have to deal with these issues on a daily basis, but of course most of you are not prominent cybersecurity researchers such as myself.
Visit my web site -- do revisit, I've added a lot lately. And oh yeah, down with Michael Sims, who stole the Censorware Project from me as if it were candy and I were a baby! I'm not a baby.
As a famous cybersecurity and anti-censorship advocate, I've done a lot of research for companies. One thing I can tell you is that $95 is simply too much for a single report.
My services are not cheap -- I probably charge more per hour than you make in a day. If you see my bio, you'll know why. I'm a self-taught genius who learned everything about computers without even taking a single class! Now I know a lot of the MSCEs (Microsoft Certified Engineers) out there might disagree, but my trade is incredibly challenging.
There's one difference between me and these know-nothings at the so-called "Gartner Group." I give away my award-winning insights on the web (do visit; I've added a lot recently) and my clients are so amazed with this free content that they give me money. Lots of money. The only thing I can't buy with my tankards of money is the Censorware Project, which Michael Sims selfishly took away from me. He's a bad man.
Every day, I read thousands of news articles from around the globe for free. Information wants to be free. How does this so-called "Gartner group," of whom I've never heard, expect to make money off by selling reports for $95?
Let me summarize: Cost of bandwidth and hosting: $0.10 per article Cost of researcher: $5 PROFIT: $89.90
With such ridiculous profit margins, I would predict that this "Gartner Group" won't last until next Tuesday.
As a crusader for freedom on the internet, I believe strongly that unwanted calls are an avoidable nuisance. To help my fellow freedom fighters, I offer these links:
As an official information freedom fighter of the 973rd Airborne Information Division, I hereby certify that "Michael's A Jerk!" is not, in fact, me.
However, I hate Michael Sims with a passion normally reserved for relations with one's dog. As a result, I hereby endorse Michael's a Jerk! as my friend.
Re:Who didn't see this coming?
on
SCO DOS'ed
·
· Score: -1
It's going really, really well. This one time last week, I called Michael Sims. (He's this mean boy who took away my web site two years ago.) So anyway, I call up Michael Sims, and I'm all like, "your family is dead! Their house blew up!" and he's all like "OMG NO MY PARENTS AND MY SISTER AND MY LITTLE DOG" but then he's like "WTF ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT I STILL LIVE WITH MY PARENTS" so I'm like "HAHA YOU FUCKING LOSER!"
Slashdot Mirror
My "stupid journal," which is actually a bastion of facts, is not on trial here. The man who is on trial, Michael Sims, is due to be tarred and feathered soon.
Instead, you should be rating my comments. My comments are Informative and Insightful, and I deserve all the praise you schmucks can throw at me.
Dear Michael Sims,
I am much more powerful than you will ever be.
Love,
Seth Finklestein.
Dear missing000,
Don't fuck with me. I will destroy you just like I destroyed Michael Sims five years ago.
Love,
Seth Finklestein.
He never could've outfought Linux. But I didn't know until this day that it was Microsoft all along.
That's a good quote, but you misspelled "Micro$haft." As a famous cybersecurity researcher, I am privy to some advanced name-calling methods that you commoners just don't have.
Dear Michael Sims aka "Anonymous Coward",
Don't be under impressions. When you're under an impression, you make an ass out of you and me.
As a famous villain, Michael Sims is the master of asses, you, and me.
As a famous cybersecurity researcher, I have access to news articles that are impeccably fresh.
.com.com: isn't that a funny domain name?
Understanding the Micro$haft-SCO connection
SCO Group drops old Caldera name -
German Linux association may drop SCO as member
Thousands say 'SCO Sue Me'
As a famous cybersecurity researcher, you should believe what I tell you.
strange, the OSX solution is free. hmm.
.com like most reputable web sites do.
That should be free*.
* Requires purchase of Macintosh and yearly $129 point release upgrades.
Also, I don't trust that Expansys link, because its domain doesn't end in a
I refuse to support Ogg until its streaming component adequately supports the Evil Bit. Slashdot has given this so-called "Evil Bit" RFC a little lip service in the past, but I think it's high time we brought it out into the open.
As a famous cybersecurity activist, I've had the honor of dinnering with Segway inventor Dean Kamen on numerous occasions. I have found him to be witty, insightful, and above all generous. On 15th March 2003, Dean Kamen presented me with the Segway Human Transporter, and I've been using one ever since.
I haven't experienced a physical sensation that is even half as stimulating as riding a Segway. It is a rush, a thrill ride, and comparable to having a bolt of lightning wedged up a lion's arse in one's trousers.
I highly recommend that you buy one. Please click here to visit Amazon.com and buy one today. Tell them that Seth Finklestein sent you, and you qualify for free shipping on all orders over $25.
I'm familiar with Arcosanti, or "Arcology" as it is called in English. From my extensive scientific research, an Arcosanti is a large dome-like community which can only be built -- at great expense -- when a city reaches a certain level of population. It thrives as a city within a city until it is fully developed, at which time it blasts off into space, never to be seen again. I remember when I
(The rest of this post is available only to Slashdot readers who have subscribed and chosen the "Seth Finklestein Plus!" option. Click here to subscribe today.)
As a famous cybersecurity activist, I feel that I am highly qualified to critique the ideas of these so-called "Car-Free Cities." It's an extension of my earlier work, called "Michael Sims-free Cities."
As a famous cybersecurity activist, I have access to highly sophisticated simulation tools. In one of these tools, which I call "Simple City 3000," roads are represented by small grid tiles which resemble pavement (or as you Americans call it, "asphalt") in appearance. Each one costs $10, but here's the kicker: each year, an upkeep cost of $1 is required. That means that in a small city with 1000 tiles of roads, $1,000 is needed just for road maintenance. In larger cities like the one I downloaded from the web yesterday, more than $50,000 is needed just to maintain the roads.
In conclusion, roads are not the answer. Proper mass transportation can save a large city upwards of $30,000 per year.
Trust me. I'm an expert.
I demand that you tell me who started those rumors. Please post his full name, address, phone number, and most importantly, e-mail address. I'll deal with him.
On second thought, I'm just going to assume that it was Michael Sims. Watch out! I'm coming for you, Michael!
Pop quiz, hot shot.
Your work machine is behind a firewall. You're visiting a client. The client has its own firewall. You need to access your work machine's desktop. What do you do? What do you do?
While you're hacking together 150-character command lines, I'll be making money off of GoToMyPC.com, the product that I created with my own two hands.
As a famous computer hacker, I can tell you that your so-called "mysql" syntax is wrong. Instead, it should be:
mysql> select a,b from table where b like "*patent*";
Thank you.
What the fuck is a '%' search? Searching for a percentage? I've been using computers since the '80s (that's right, I said *'80s*) and I've never used % ever.
Here's an example.
C:\> dir *.*
(prints lots of files)
C:\> dir %.%
dir: NO FILES FOUND
According to Google News, even this retard's babbling counts as "news." See?
I think Google News needs to filter their sources list down. Otherwise, it will become just as useless as Froogle, which provides links to many web pages which are not in fact stores.
Frankly, I'm surprised that Slashdot didn't come to me, internationally known cybersecurity activist Seth Finklestein, for advice on the matter. I have been abused like a tattered rag doll by Slashdot's own editor, Michael Sims.
Ever since Michael Sims' message "The Censorware Project is Closed," I have been kept awake at night by persistent phone calls and very loud e-mails sent by Michael. Mr. Sims has called me, my wife, my five internationally acclaimed children, and even my wife with vague threats against me.
I did absolutely nothing wrong at any point in my life. I am a shining beacon in a godless, hateful world. Please help me. I'm a victim.
Listen, fucktard. These fucktards at the fucktard store are charging nineteen fucking dollars for a CD containing 37 minutes of really awful music by a fucktard named Justin Timberlake .
Frankly, a child who doesn't like the same music as me isn't just a loser. He's a fucktard loser.
As all of you are aware, Michael Sims is the Jerry Falwell of the 21st Century. He stole away my award winning project, the Censorware project, in what can only be called the crime of the century. (Do revisit, I've added many updates.)
When Michael Sims took away my project, he left me angry and bitter. From his first message "The Censorware Project is now closed" to his current propagation of lies and slander, Michael Sims has desecrated the freedom that I and every American stand for.
Sex.com is a pitiful excuse for a "hijacking." I implore you, Slashdot, do a story about Michael Sims taking away a web site that is far more enticing than any "Sex" site.
You know, I was just talking about this over coffee with my good friend Bill Brown. He runs a tour of New York's security cameras, so that protesters such as myself can easily point out the cameras and mock them. I've been going on this tour every week with Dr. Brown, and every time he has even more incisive insights.
As a very famous cybersecurity researcher, I feel that I am highly qualified to talk about Homeland Security. My deep knowledge of computers -- which came with no formal training, just my own intelligence -- can easily be applied to solving real-world security problems. My award-winning research has led to landmark decisions in the field of security.
I have the right to control every aspect of my identity, both in "interspace" and in "meat-space." When someone takes a picture of me in the real world, I have every right to walk up to that person and shout at them until they agree to delete the picture from their "mini-hard drive card" or burn the film in front of me. I know that most of you don't have to deal with these issues on a daily basis, but of course most of you are not prominent cybersecurity researchers such as myself.
Visit my web site -- do revisit, I've added a lot lately. And oh yeah, down with Michael Sims, who stole the Censorware Project from me as if it were candy and I were a baby! I'm not a baby.
As a famous cybersecurity and anti-censorship advocate, I've done a lot of research for companies. One thing I can tell you is that $95 is simply too much for a single report. My services are not cheap -- I probably charge more per hour than you make in a day. If you see my bio, you'll know why. I'm a self-taught genius who learned everything about computers without even taking a single class! Now I know a lot of the MSCEs (Microsoft Certified Engineers) out there might disagree, but my trade is incredibly challenging. There's one difference between me and these know-nothings at the so-called "Gartner Group." I give away my award-winning insights on the web (do visit; I've added a lot recently) and my clients are so amazed with this free content that they give me money. Lots of money. The only thing I can't buy with my tankards of money is the Censorware Project, which Michael Sims selfishly took away from me. He's a bad man.
Every day, I read thousands of news articles from around the globe for free. Information wants to be free. How does this so-called "Gartner group," of whom I've never heard, expect to make money off by selling reports for $95?
Let me summarize:
Cost of bandwidth and hosting: $0.10 per article
Cost of researcher: $5
PROFIT: $89.90
With such ridiculous profit margins, I would predict that this "Gartner Group" won't last until next Tuesday.
As a crusader for freedom on the internet, I believe strongly that unwanted calls are an avoidable nuisance. To help my fellow freedom fighters, I offer these links:
Suing Telemarketers without those sneaky lawyers taking your money!
Suing Telemarketers by Ben Livingston - they say he's crazy, but I say he's a hero!
Remove.org - you can add yourself to the global do not contact list to opt out of all advertisements!
SueTelemarketers.com - because they take away minutes of my free time when I'm trying to eat food, I invest hours of my free time trying to track down and sue telemarketers one by one.
That's all. Good night, and good luck!
As an official information freedom fighter of the 973rd Airborne Information Division, I hereby certify that "Michael's A Jerk!" is not, in fact, me.
However, I hate Michael Sims with a passion normally reserved for relations with one's dog. As a result, I hereby endorse Michael's a Jerk! as my friend.
How do you like them apples, friendless asshole Michael Sims?
It's going really, really well. This one time last week, I called Michael Sims. (He's this mean boy who took away my web site two years ago.) So anyway, I call up Michael Sims, and I'm all like, "your family is dead! Their house blew up!" and he's all like "OMG NO MY PARENTS AND MY SISTER AND MY LITTLE DOG" but then he's like "WTF ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT I STILL LIVE WITH MY PARENTS" so I'm like "HAHA YOU FUCKING LOSER!"
So in short, it's going really, really well.