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The Ultimate Cubicle
kimba writes "Scott Adams of Dilbert fame has developed the ultimate cubicle with design company IDEO (the same guys that made the Palm V and the new sexy Cisco IP phones). Lying in a hammock watching boss-cam... shweeeet." Still, nothing beats a wireless laptop on a shaded porch, beverage in hand.
The ultimate cubicle is not having one and being in a corner office :)
you a winna , ha ha ha
Now that's my idea of an office with a view.
- If This Peace Is Fictious, I Shall Destroy It
No offense to you slashdot editors, but you guys have no idea what life in a cube farm is like. It isn't all that bad...
Add some desktop items and toys from a good place (like thinkgeek), maybe a nice Aeron chair, and everything is peachy for your day to day work.
Good quote, too many chars. Seriously, the slashdot 120 char limit sucks!
Ideo's take:
http://www.ideo.com/dilbert/
you a winna , ha ha ha
>
Maybe we could have a "Lord of the Rings" topic icon? What do you think about it?
That rant being said, I want a cubicle size commensurate with my job load, if we can't backfill two people, so I have to work harder to make up for that, I want two cubicles.
Cubes are just working areas for 8 hours of your day, not little appartments where you sleep. Its in interesting article but for the most part a cube is a cube is a cube.
Instead I've got a Hot Desk.
While this can mean free & easy living, it also means you have to pack the entire contents of your working life into your laptop-bag every evening, and set it all up again the next morning, and you don't have a monitor to stick post-it notes on.
I yearn for a desk (or even a cube!) where I could actually feel at home, and not like some sort of transient drifting soul through the sea of employment.
Gosh, when I go to work I like to get things done. I like to write my programs; I like to run my tests; I like to read research papers. Scott Adams seems to think that the best kind of work is no work. If you hate what you're doing, this is true. If you like your job, it's not. I want a quiet, well lit cube with lots of desk space. Yes, an office would be better, but you make the best of what you have. The article was kind of funny, but not in the way it was intended to be funny. Scott Adams is out of touch with the white collar working community, and it shows both in the article and in his comic strip.
The middle mind speaks!
anyone here read slashdot? It's a pretty cool site, you should really check it out.
and personally I think sitting with an actual person on a shaded porch, beverage in hand(s) is even better.
~jeff
Is anyone else reminded of the car Homer designed?
--
Mod up a post Rob doesn't like and you'll never mod again
I want a cube which makes it easy to route and hide cables, not one which makes it easy to hang my shirt (cos I always carry a spare shirt with me, naturally)
does it have interesting computer and technology news, or is it just another healdine grabbing puff piece media whore weblog?
I can think of slightly better accommodations, but that's beside the point. I think Taco and Hemos should be banned from posting stories where they bitch slap us with their luxuries such as 7 laptops, a handful of arcade games complete with cabinet, T1's in the bathroom, and everything else out slavish devotion to /. has brought them.
Unless of course I can get a job slapping a -1 on "Forst Pist!" and "goatse.cx" that will buy me all that stuff. In that case, mail me(now!), and keep bragging.
jX [ Make everything as simple as possible, but no simpler. - Einstein ]
Why not just make a wireless cubicle? You put wireless access points around the city with PGP (not WEP) encryption. Then, The employees can work wherever they want. If they want cold soda they can go to the convenience store. If they want coffee they can go to the coffee shop. If they want to work they can go to the middle of nowhere, provided no other co-workers are there. Then you wouldn't even have to worry about the boss finding you.
Simon
Must be nice to have cashed in the Andover and VA stock early.
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Seriously, I can't believe they designed a "perfect cube" and didn't include a means in which to have a readily available supply of alcohol within arms reach...
~ now you know
"Even your wastebasket will kind of vibrate with happiness when trash is thrown into it. So you want the cubicle to love you and care for you, kind of a womb experience."
Does anybody get the feeling that Scott Adams is channeling Douglass Adams? I'm reminded of the doors -- "Please enjoy your trip through this door."
Mind you, in the Newsweek blurb, they mention that you (paraphrasing) "might be rewarded from the boss with the aquarium add-on". Great - the ability to personalize one's cubicle is now a reward rather than a norm?
"Pinky, you've left the lens cap of your mind on again." - P&TB
"I can see my house from here!" - ST:
The amount of desk space in that cube is a problem. I doubt if I could work in it because of how little it has. I liked all the other stuff though, the fish tank, removable/interchangeable modules, the window sim, etc.. put more desk space in it and I would use it.
Go Lakers!
Holy heck, and I thought there were only half a dozen!
Just wish my darned local bookstore had heard of Scott Adams.
Who needs an aquarium? Or a mechanical flower that wiltes when you leave? And simulated sun movement? Give me a break.
The ultimate cube has a place to put a stereo with CD's, lots of desk space, a fridge, and wall space to hang pictures, artwork, and other necessities (read: vendor calendars and commonly referenced notes).
THIS is what we call Ultimate Cubicle.
The chair is OK, but I'd like to see a padded, leather, reclining one. Oh, and with a built in Massager.
I'd let the massager go home at night, he probably has a cat to take care of.
The real keys to an enjoyable cubicle experience, IMNSHO, are two things:
1) headphones;
2) a sign reading something to the effect of: "Due to recent cutbacks, we have found it necessary to charge for casual conversation at the rate of one (1) beer per half-hour, after work, payable in advance."
Give it a shot, let me know how it works out...
I looked into the abyss, and the abyss looked into me--and we both winked.
If you read between the lines it's that the corporations are good and the workers are bad. Not surprising since he would sell his grandmother's soul to Satan for a buck as he does in marketing his dreck.
WANTED: Somebody to go back in time with me. This is not a joke. P.O. Box 322, Oakview, CA 93022. You'll get paid after we get back. Must bring your own weapons. Safety not guaranteed. I have only done this once before.
What I find more important than having a comfy cubicle is if your monitor is facing the gen pop, or if it's faced to the back wall. Hey, if my monitor isn't facing the crowd, i'll obviously have higher scores in solitare and snake because I won't be as nervous.
Shudder. Shades of:
Please enjoy your trip through this door.
and
Glad to be of service!
You could've hired me.
You just don't get it, do you ?
"lying in a hammock" "wireless laptop on the porch" "ultimate cubicle"
You are still at work whatever your cube looks like. A prison is still a prison even if the food is good.
From Filthy Critic's review of "Office Space":
"The jokes are funny and more than half work. They are almost exclusively about office shit: all the stupid fucking memos; all the fakeness; all the bullshit office workers have to put up with. The movie is much funnier than the lame-ass world "Dilbert" and "Cathy" cartoons because it acknowledges the true misery lurking under all those fluorescent lights (if you like Dilbert and/or Cathy, please leave and visit other web sites because you are not welcome here). Dilbert and Cathy joke about offices, but their authors are such pricks that they believe, deep down, we all love our jobs They aren't against office culture, they are for it. That's why Dilbert and Cathy bullshit is always hanging over Goddamned copy machines. And that's why the most annoying asshole in every office is always the biggest "Dilbert" fan."
So True...
Cubes would be so much better if i could bring my bong....
...then I realized that right now, I have a foozball table, big screen TV and a bar in my office, and a pool table and gym in the next room.
There is nothing so silly as other peoples traditions, and nothing so sacred as our own.
I think it kinda brings back the 60's in the office. All those cubes and flowers. Anyway, I like the design... but I wonder, does it come with a pair of shoes with a fishtank in each sole?
42 + 1 = 42
I was trying to check out CNN for my regular dose of corporate-friendly news and it appeared to be down.
"No problem" I think, and head back to Slashdot. The newest story on Slashdot links to CNN. *Grin*
Finally, a place where I can buy business hammocks.
Where's the monitor in that Dilbert office?
... there is no filing cabinet ... there's a desk side thingy that will hold about 20 folders.
Where's the O'Reilly books?
Where's the stacks of paper?
Where's the refrigerator?
Where's the desk space?
Where's the filing cabinet?
Oh yeah
You know what? This isn't Dilbert's cubicle. This is the PHB's cubicle (if he had a cubicle). It's a bunch of crap with no actual facilities for geek work.
Where's the giant whiteboard? I worked in a place once where we did some physical re-modelling. The boss asked us what kind of facilities we wanted in the conference room. I said "whiteboard. Floor-to-ceiling whiteboard. Just tile that whole wall in melanine." He did it, and we used it.
The fold-down visitor chair is a neat idea though.
Hemos,
A shady porch with a cold beverage is close but I can one up that: White sandy beach, near crystal blue water (and a sealed, ruggedized laptop with wireless access... if you care), 27 deg C, a cool drink, a palm or a beach umbrella for some shade, sun, and the sea breeze. That verges on not being work.
Of course, if it was like the last Cuban beach I was on (Sorry, you Americans wouldn't know about it - nice holiday spot just south of Florida - you really should try a visit sometime...), there'd be enough _distractions_ that productivity would suffer.
The big plus is that you don't give a damn...
-- Mal: "Well they tell you: never hit a man with a closed fist. But it is, on occasion, hilarious."
I just want a cube with a god damned decent computer in it. I'm programming on an outdated POS Pentium 166 while the Sales Executives are checking their email on brand-spanking new PIII laptops. WTF is that about?
Wooden armaments to battle your imaginary foes!
Why new cubes... thought by 2000 we would be working from home?
Once he was a genius. Then along came the pathetically bad Dilbert TV series, and now this stupid ultimate cubicle thing. When I saw the article on CNN, I assumed he had actually designed a functional cubicle with amenities people really need, and was interested. Instead I find I wasted 20 seconds and 2 mouse clicks to read crap about a boss-cam and hammocks. And some design firm actually is advertising their involvement with this ?
It looks like it would cost a fortune. Certainly alot more than those snap together cubes I've seen in the past.
FAKE! Mod down!
The cube might be interesting, I'll never know, as the storywas worthless. there is appearently an aquarium, but I have no clue how it fits. There is a Hammock, but I can't tell if anyone could take a nap in it. there might be a fold down chair, which could be useful or useless, but I can't tell because it isn't shown.
In other words this is a fluff story lacking the meat any engineer would want. there are no pictures. There are some neat gimics (the coffee warme/cola cooler might be useful) but appearently no attention was paid to accually getting work done. Where is the comptuer? does it interface to the white board so I can save my notes? Does the sun simulation lighting not cause excessive glare on my screen?
whoever thought of the chair that automaticly calls your phone after it is in use too long (to get people out of teh cube) should be shot. the only people who can use this function are in customer service and will get critical calls often enough that it isn't an issue. The rest of us know the someone personally in our cube is higher priority then the phone and let voice mail take the call. (Unless we have callerID and suspect the call is a family emergency)
I don't want a mechanic flower that wilts. If I want a flower I want a real one. Depending on how green my thumb is I might or might not want the cube to take care of the flower. (some like to do the work themselves, some just want the green). And those who want flowers want a good ventalation/filtration system so that I can smell it in my cube, but he guy in the next cube won't die from allergys. (I happen to work with someone deathly allergic to some plants)
So if my boss is reading this: there are some neat ideas here that we should consider for our cubes, but it isn't the ultimate cube.
reply in general to all people posting things like "that's stupid", "scott adams is a corporate whore", "that won't help me get any work done" -- you all need to lighten up. Anybody who takes cubicle designs from the author of 'dilbert' as a serious thing needs to be examined. It's funny. It's not intended to increase productivity, it's intended to make you laugh. Get a grip.
do not read this line twice.
If you go to IDEO's site they have some goods pages with animation describing some of the features. It's a pop-up so I can't link to it directly. I looked there before reading the CNN article, so I actually liked the CNN article. YMMV.
I have a website. It's about Macs.
I didn't think it was something for real. I figured Scott Adams, being a cartoonist, created it as something amusing and Dilbertish.
I was an intern at M&M Mars and I noticed that there were no cubicles at all. The company noted studies that showed that employee's were more productive in war rooms and they hated tiny cubes. I remember reading a simuliar news article here on /. about this a few months ago. So basically they took all the cubicles out and just had rows of desks. They even took out the offices! It looks so much nicer not to mention you can't really goof off with everyone watching so productivity is way up. If you ever need something you can just go up to someones desk and ask. No waiting behind an office door. Also you can find someone easier by just glancing across the room. In other words I felt more free and less confined.
If I were a CEO I would make sure no cubicles were installed at all. I could save costs with productivity and the employee's would like it more.
http://saveie6.com/
He started Dilbert while he was working in a cubicle at PacBell.
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While i think that Adam's cubicle is cool, I still think that these are still cool. I think they were once featured on slashdot, but search is still down.
Opportunities multiply as they are seized. --Sun-Tzu
Here in Amerika (spelling intentionally perturbed in protest of the stalin-esk laws that we call the DCMA) we are spoiled rotten. we live in homes that have 860-2000 square feet if you are a normal human being or more if you're a really overpaid creature. many-many in japan live in much less. and they do so comfortabaly(sp?). in reality we dont need that much room. (except for storage of the massive amounts of crap we collect... I really dont need my collection of remote control aircraft,12 computers,electronics engineering lab, etc...)
what I would love to see is this same "cubicle" principal to a living space. make a 120 Square foot serviceable apartment. (ok, 140SQ foot... you have to add a bathroom) does anyone have any links to ultra-compact living spaces?
Do not look at laser with remaining good eye.
would have a couple 16-year old Japanese girls built in to service me with their cotton-clad pussies.
Here's the cubicle described better.
Ok, Japan has a big economy too, but it's also a very small country with a lot of people, making space an expensive resource - that's hardly true for the US.
So really, why shouldn't USians have a decent work environment?
Here's a radio interview with Tom Kelley, their general manager. And here's a fascinating web page showing all the cool stuff they've worked on.
I work for a VERY cool company.
I have my own 12x12 office with a real door.
I don't have a desk... I have a leather couch, 4 floor-to-ceiling bookcases filled with as much technical stuff as I want, a stereo, a whiteboard, several maps, and a 30 gallon fishtank with a breeding pair of freshwater angelfish. My laptop is wireless.
Our corporate culture is 'incompatible' with cubicles. When the company moved a few years ago, the company doing the buildout thought we were crazy... no cubicles. Single and double occupancy offices, each office with it's own 15 amp circuit so we can have halogen lamps and refrigerators beside multiple 21 inch monitors, etc.
You might think I was a pointy-haired boss... I'm a software engineer.
Yeah yeah, I'm bragging. So what. Mod me down if you're jealous.
I'd prefer it to, but noise is the problem that pannels were made to solve.
Friends don't help friends install M$ junk.
http://www.cafepress.com/cp/store/store.aspx?store id=squaredstuff,slackerz
Yeah, its a shameless plug, but I got nothing else to do today.
Although this cubicle is probably a joke, it looks like there are some good ideas in it that could be used in future office designs. The hammock isn't too bad an idea even though it seems like one. Sure you don't want people sleeping in the office, but what if someone just wants to take a short break and think about a problem for a while before tackling it. I'd say a hammock would be a good place for that.
We're spending too much time fettered by the establishment, drones to the cadence of conformity.
what I would love to see is this same "cubicle" principal to a living space. make a 120 Square foot serviceable apartment.
Are you kidding? I'm cramped with my wife in a 600 square foot 1 bedroom apartment. Hell, even when I go camping my tent is larger than 120 s.f.
"why someone would build an office on a swamp is a different rant"
And it sank into the swamp.
So I built another, and that sank into the swamp.
I built a third office, that one burned down, and then sank into the swamp.
But the forth one, stayed up. And that's what you'll work in, the strongest office building in the isles.
(with appologies)
"You like Chinese food." -Fortune Cookie
Cube's really aren't that bad. Really.
In the DC area, real estate is expensive enough that you typically are given a choice when you join a company. Either you have a small cube to yourself, or you share a somewhat larger office with someone else.
I work much better in my own little world. Sharing an office causes countless distractions. Twice as many calls, twice as many visitors, half as much room, arguments that the heat or AC is two high or low, etc. I find it much less productive.
A cube to yourself is your own little world. You can spread your books, papers, disks, and work stuff all over the place without regard for someone else's space. You can come and go as you please, and you don't have to be interrupted by someone else's calls or visitors.
Take care,
Brian
100% Linux Web Hosting, No Windows, No Code Red Worms...
And, contrary to what you are saying productivity in most parts of europe is a lot higher than in the US.
(wipes tear from eye from laughing so hard) Oh man, so when you take your 2 months of vacation that are required of you, you're home working to keep up the productivity? That just doesn't jive since you're all just LAZY MOTHERFUCKING BASTARDS. Europe is too busy lambasting the US to divert attention from other parts of the world that Europe is a plague on the planet. They seem to think that other parts of the world hate the US as much as they do. The Europeans do too much talking... not enough doing. You LAZY MOTHERFUCKING BASTARDS don't deserve the time it took me to write this.
saru mo ki kara ochiru
USELESS! Mod down!
Having both had my own office and having had several cubes (senior developer), I'll take a cubicle (a good one) any day.
Cubicle disads vs office:
-- space (sometimes)
-- privacy
-- solitude to get work done uninterrupted
Office disads vs cubicle:
-- isolation (social/jungle telegraph)
-- often lower air quality than open areas
-- you can get cornered even more effectively by annoying folks
-- it tends to come with more responsibility and that can be a pain
The main reason a cube is better is the social interaction, cross-pollenation between developers, and the ability to use jungle telegraph to pickup on neat things you need to know happening in the office (new toys, odd corporate happenings, etc).
-- you move from being one of "us" (the cube farm dwellers) to being one of "them" (the office enabled class) thus creating a bit of a social gulf (even if you say it won't change you, like most lottery winners, moving tends to change you... different neighbourhood, different friends).
The best solution is a full wall cube in an area with good lighting and air circulation off of the main thoroughfares in cubeville. You get the best combination of ability to be "in the know" and "in the loop", the best social interface with co-workers, and a sufficient amount of privacy to concentrate.
So instead of damning the cubicle, damn poorly designed cube-farms with poor lighting and not enough elbow room. A good cube is a very productive place.
-- Mal: "Well they tell you: never hit a man with a closed fist. But it is, on occasion, hilarious."
I wonder how many Japanese would kill for a 'typical American sized house' as opposed to a cramped Tokyo apartment?
Imho just because someone must live in a cramped living space out of necessity doesn't mean that everyone should do the same voluntarily.
Hey, I may work in a cube, but I have a window looking out on a lake. And a few weeks ago I guess that a snapping turtle laid her eggs right under my window, because today they hatched. I got to watch about 42 or 43 little baby snapping turtles take their first steps in the world. The only sad thing is that my contract ends in 3 weeks and then I'm out of here. Oh well. :)
It's cool that Fred Durst is so talented.
Whatever happened to his Dilberito? Wasn't he selling some kind of vegetarian microwavable burrito that was supposed to be the perfect cubicle food?
I was going to at least buy a couple to see if they were any good, but I never saw them anywhere...
Vidi, Vici, Veni
Man.
If that's not enough of a reason to love these guys, I don't know what.
The Logitech CyberMan II was the king-hell perfecto par excellence of game controllers. And it was gorgeous and sexy.
But of course, nobody bought it so nobody developed for it so no body bought it...
It will come back. The world continues to spin, and lost clues are merely buried to be discovered anew when we rebuild our civilization.
--Blair
...for fifteen minutes until the laptop battery dies.
You mean, an office?
Buckets,
pompomtom
"There's an exception to every rule. Except for some rules"
Especially mid-70s. What is it with all that
green and orange? Brings back bad memories.
Concept is good for a laugh or two, which I think was how it was meant to be taken.
I think you could get a chuckle from upper management the first time you proposed such a plan, but only the first time.
...we don't get to choose what company makes our cubicle. Therefore, 90% of the ideas that make his cubicle so "cool" are actually useless.
Imagine if EVERYONE in your office had that nifty fold-out chair that rings your phone. Gee, I wonder if your co-workers and boss would catch on to that trick?
I can see it now. Co-worker sits down in fold-out chair. It's set to ring your phone in 5 minutes. At 4:59 on the clock, your wife calls. "Honey, would you like to go out to dinner tonight? I can hire a sitter."
Your co-worker laughs at this lame attempt to kick him out of the cube, grabs the phone out of your hand, and yells "Fuck you, I ain't going nowhere!" into the phone, and hangs it up for you.
Hey, that would make a great Dilbert cartoon. Almost.
"And like that
I've seen something like that, but the only thing I could find about it was this
anyone know it's real name? is it still around?
Except possibly to reduce the amount of energy used to heat/cool that enormous (relative to other countries) space that you occupy. Efficient use of space does not always mean cramped - that's a design issue.
.sig
The best desk i've ever found is probably the cheapest ever as well.. and it has more room than anything i've seen. For My desk i have laid a hollow core door over two filing cabinets. Voila!
Drawers and a huge working surface for ~$50
Over the last few years, I've found that the best desk setup for me is a six or eight foot banquet table, with a shelf of 3/4" finished plywood mounted about three inches above the table surface. I've currently got 4 or 5 monitors on the shelf, and keyboards not in use get shoved under the shelf. The computers are on a roll-around wire bakery rack off to the side. The's lots of legroom for moving around and the table generally remains free for work.
Jim Potter
My ultimate would be a nice set of patio furniture, and an 802.11 connection
Cat: The other white meat