Slashdot Mirror

← Back to Stories (view on slashdot.org)

Water Spectacular in Episode III?

Posted by Zonk on from the that's-something-you-don't-see-every-day dept.

An anonymous reader writes "From StarWars.com: 'With the prequel trilogy lacking in elaborate musical numbers, Aaron McBride and the rest of the Art Department were given the task to create visuals for a new spectacular in Episode III.' Lucas didn't piss off enough people with Jar-Jar?" The link is to an image of a Mon Calamari(?) woman in some sort of performance outfit. A water spectacular ala Esther Williams, perhaps?

30 of 441 comments (clear)

  1. Obligatory by hyperm0g · · Score: 5, Funny

    It's a trap!

    1. Re:Obligatory by ultranova · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Since when do molluscs have tits and need a bikini top?

      Since marketing got their hands on one.

      However, has it ever been stated that Calamari are not mammals ?

      --

      Forget magic. Any technology distinguishable from divine power is insufficiently advanced.

  2. Comment removed by account_deleted · · Score: 5, Informative

    Comment removed based on user account deletion

  3. Ep 3 was suppose to be dark and gritty by teiresias · · Score: 5, Funny

    and nothing says that like a musical number. Get those legs up padiwans!

    --
    -Teiresias
    1. Re:Ep 3 was suppose to be dark and gritty by Seumas · · Score: 5, Funny

      As someone who couldn't care less about Star Wars, I have to say I am really loving Lucas. The more he and others bastardize Star Wars (darth potato happy meal figure!) the more pissed off and upset Star Wars gits become. It's great entertainment.

      I hope Lucas continues to screw with various Star Wars bits far into the future. Maybe redo all six episodes with some new technology and add/remove things. Maybe replace all the light sabers with walkie-talkies, ala Spielberg's ET. And if he does the next three movies, it'll give us another decade of pure enjoyment watching all these guys growing into their 50s, still bemoaning the more raping of their "childhood" by Lucas.

      Pure gold. Pure frigging gold!

    2. Re:Ep 3 was suppose to be dark and gritty by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      I agree with this post. As a long time fan of the, far superior, Star Trek: The Next Generation franchise, I have to say that it brings me great joy watching the idiots who believe in a fantasy get upset over the desecration of their childlike vision of the universe. There is no predestined "chosen one" as the Star Wars series seems to fixate on. In reality, the people who are vaunted as the "chosen ones" are typically egomaniacs or members of the elite ruling class. These people have no interest in really helping the common man. They only pay lip service to those functions of their position. The pope is our most recent example of this fallacy. The only way for humans to evolve to the next level is for us to put away greed and fear. Once those negative traits are eliminated from humanity, we will make the next step to being a new kind of human. This is what the Star Trek franchise is all about. It is a celebration of what man CAN be. Not a child's fantasy about far away, great places with noblemen. So, for those of you with a brain, put away your childish fantasies of the Star Wars joke and instead broaden your minds to the maturity and integrity of the Star Trek universe. If you want role models, there are plenty of great ones in Trek:

      1. Captain James T. Kirk
      2. Scotty
      3. Spock
      4. Data (I relate to him the most as I really consider myself to be more a machine than a human)
      5. Captain Jean-Luc Picard
      6. Captain Katherine Janeway
      7. Tuvok

      If you model your life after any of these characters you will server yourself much better than if you try to become Anakin or Luke. Wake up people. Star Wars is a joke that only pathetic losers are into. Star Trek is for those of us who have grown up and have an open mind to reality instead of fiction.

    3. Re:Ep 3 was suppose to be dark and gritty by secolactico · · Score: 5, Insightful

      A Star Trek fan (Trekky? trekker?) telling Star Wars fan to go get a life.

      Only on slashdot.

      But you do have a point. Let's stop looking for role model in blockbusters or almost any movie in general.

      Star Wars is entertainment. Cool coreographed battles. Lots of special effects. Plotlines that have been done many times over.

      Let's watch and enjoy the movie. But don't go looking for the meaning of life on them (insert Monty Python joke here). Same goes for Star Trek, the Matrix and The Lord of the Rings.

      --
      No sig
    4. Re:Ep 3 was suppose to be dark and gritty by Haeleth · · Score: 5, Funny

      Yes, folks, it's "Springtime for Vader"!

  4. Proof by CypherXero · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Further proof that George Lucas has lost his mind...actually, he can stop with the proof now, this is like the 200th thing so far...

  5. It's like.. by OmgTEHMATRICKS · · Score: 5, Funny

    It's like Lucas, Michael Jackson, and the guys who did the Matrix Reloaded rave got together and brainstormed. If that's even physically possible.

  6. Re:Water spectacular?! by Fjornir · · Score: 5, Funny
    It's a trap!

    Fuck, I'm on slashdot. Sorry.

    --
    I want a new world. I think this one is broken.
  7. Imperial Skinny Dipping by Ohreally_factor · · Score: 5, Funny

    That's not a moon!

    --
    It's not offtopic, dumbass. It's orthogonal.
  8. Re:Mon Calamar by Fjornir · · Score: 5, Funny

    Why would a humanoid squid have breasts?

    --
    I want a new world. I think this one is broken.
  9. Re:Water spectacular?! by scragz · · Score: 5, Funny

    Would not hit it. Eyes are way too big and she has webbed hands and feet.

  10. That suit's about as useful as. . . by kfg · · Score: 5, Funny

    . . .tits on a squid.

    KFG

  11. Re:Water spectacular?! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    I'd hit it, with a stick.

  12. No imagination by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Why do all female aliens have boobs?

    1. Re:No imagination by NitsujTPU · · Score: 5, Insightful

      For that matter, why are they humanoid.

      What if there were just giant planets inhabitted by slime-mold, or intelligent creatures that just didn't give a damn, and so they never developed useful society?

      Where the hell is Planet Hollywood!?!

      Why do these creatures want to form governments anyway. With drastically different evolutionary timelines, one creature has propably evolved past war, another so evolved that all of the others seem more like suitable pets, another so unevolved that it's unaware that the others exist.

      Why do people in the future right with light sabers?

      Why do people in the future fight in person, if there are autonomous robots capable of doing so?

      Why do space ships need pilots at the helm rather than computers?

      Why is future technology so bad it always needs fixing?

      Why does C3P0 handle machinery with his hands, rather than some sort of networking?

      When R2D2 connects with machinery, why isn't it wirelessly? Why does it require physical manipulation? For that matter, when he's in Cloud City, why does he move so slowly when hacking into that computer, how many bits could he really encode a second through physical manipulation?

      Probably, because it makes a better movie. My bet is that, if we ever talk to life somewhere else in the universe, that they are literally nothing like us. It won't be humanoids in space suits breathing nitrogen... it will be giant amoebas in polymer bags that prevent them from splashing apart in the low atmosphere of the earth.

    2. Re:No imagination by Sloppy · · Score: 5, Funny
      Why do all female aliens have boobs?
      So you have something to look at while you're talking to them?
      --
      As copyright owner of this comment, I authorize everyone to defeat any technological measure which limits access to it.
    3. Re:No imagination by skaffen42 · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Actually the platypus lays eggs and feeds its young with breasts. So it does happen on Earth.

      Then again, if you have to use the platypus to justify anything you have probably gone too far...

      --
      People couldn't type. We realized: Death would eventually take care of this.
  13. Re:How do they do this? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Informative
    Well, if you need to ask you can't afford it, so I'm guessing this is curiosity. The companies that make this software will make a custom installation for the needs of one moviehouse -- and often a single movie. The price of the software will include n techs working for you throughout the life of the project, training for your artists, and so on... Basically hiring a software team to complement your software team to and work subordinate to the true artists.

    Most often you'll be looking at Mac workstations (a recent change from SGI) and linux for the renderfarm (often SGI in the past as well, but SGI had less of a stranglehold outside of the workstation).

    Yes, you could do this with Linux and Blender provided you had a full-time development team to tweak Blender to do exactly what you want, a big enough cluster to render a single preview frame fast enough that the artist doesn't loose their rythm, and another full-time development team working on the tools to move the objects (plot the arc for the ball when it's thrown, and so on).

  14. Re:How do they do this? by albieomoss · · Score: 5, Informative

    I love Blender to death but it is by no means capable of the kind of effects you are seeing now in films. I'd say most movie special effects are done in Maya right now. The MEL scripting makes it very easy to program custom behavior and huge crowd scenes like those in The Lord of the Rings. Some studios use Softimage|XSI, some, like Pixar, use custom software developed in house to work on their computer systems. But I'm just talking about 3D animation packages, half of it is the compositing software. As far as OS goes it varies. You'll probably see a lot of Irix and UNIX boxes. Lots of clusters. Render Farms.

    --
    DankLogic - There is a system to everything.
  15. Re:Water spectacular?! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Well take your scuba goggles off and put your beer ones on!

  16. Re:Mon Calamar by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    As Lucas has aged his sexual tastes have drifted to the rarefied realms of his wealth.

  17. It's a watery tart.... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Does she hand out lightsabres?

    1. Re:It's a watery tart.... by RexxFiend · · Score: 5, Funny

      real force power comes from midichlorians, not some farcical aquatic ceremony...

      (btw that was genius, I ready did LOL!)

      --

      A crash reduces
      Your expensive computer
      to a simple stone.
  18. Bring back the bar band by planckscale · · Score: 5, Insightful
    I know it's too late now but I wish Lucas would have spent just a fraction of his budget on location shoots and puppets. Bring back the puppet bar band from the first Star Wars movie. I swear, all this blue screen green screen crap will make this next movie crap. Instead of spending 20mil on a fiber optic digital rendering, spend 10 mil and spend the rest on an actual location shoot. Don't expect to see real dirt when someone falls on the ground. Nor real grass, real fog, or real water. It'll all just be some digital rendering. Even though that trash compactor in the first movie looked kind of fake, at least the actors hair would get wet and princess lea's makeup would run. These water willy extravaganzas will be entertaining maybe but half the fun of the first star wars was the "that's clever" factor; now it's just adventure-less story telling, set on a sterile lifeless digital backdrop. I guess a dollar doesn't go as far anymore but I can't blame Lucas wants to sit in a studio with a mochachino and watch a plasma screen instead of spending a week in the Gobi desert. Oh well, at least I still have the Clone Wars animated series DVD to look forward to.

    --
    Namaste
  19. I told you, darling... by Jonathan+Burns · · Score: 5, Funny

    no capes!

  20. Re:Mon Calamar by C10H14N2 · · Score: 5, Funny

    Actually, it would be "mon calmar."

    "Calamari" is Italian.

    Proof yet again that Lucas is a pretentious know-nothing hack. "Mon Calamari," being a bastardization of both French and Italian isn't, even forgiving that, gramatically correct as it uses a singular possessive with a plural noun. Lucas, you ignorant slut...

  21. Re:Water spectacular?! by Sloppy · · Score: 5, Funny
    That Innsmouth-look gets me so hot.

    "Hey baby, show me why they call you a Deep One."

    "You, me, and a shoggoth. Whaddya say?"

    --
    As copyright owner of this comment, I authorize everyone to defeat any technological measure which limits access to it.