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The Worst Foods to Eat Over a Keyboard
An anonymous reader writes "Pasta? Pizza? Keyboards are often subject to the harshest of conditions -- spaghetti sauce, coffee spill, et al. ZDNet is running a list of worst-food nominations. What is your pick?"
Cause it would stick to every key.
Ramen is bad to eat over a keyboard... poor poor keyboard. At least it tastes like spicy chicken!
I would say the In-N-Out 16 x 16 burger would be no fun over a keyboard: http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/TexasBurger Guy/InNOut/inout_big.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/TexasBurger Guy/InNOut/inoutreceipt_big.jpg
My mother's cooking. Worst. Food. Evar.
Orange fingers + keyboard = orange keyboard.
It's not recommended to lick off the orange powder from your fingers either since that makes your keyboard full of either saliva (best case) or an orange paste (if you do a poor job licking).
Vote Libertarian
This should be a poll.
Worst option: Cowboyneal.
Best option: Breasts!
Every time I spill Coke on my keyboard (yes, it's happened more than once) I've had to replace the whole thing because the coke at away at the circuitry. When I clean off the soda, the solder and wiring come with it.
This is news? Hell people, just look down for a sec and see for yourself.
Spam. :-)
Assume I was drunk when I posted this.
Orange Juice is the most insidious. I spilt OJ on my Dell laptop keyboard. Then I took the extreme measure of using water to wash it out (I didn't take the keyboard off the laptop as I didn't know I could). Everything seemed fine for a few months. Then, gradually, one-by-one, keys started to get sticky. Eventually, about eight months laters, my keyboard became unusable and I had to replace it.
Helping with organizational effectiveness is our job.
smoking, and ashes, although not food, are the worst. my keyboards may have survived incidental coffee and other drinks, but my smoking habits costs me about 3 or 4 keyboards/year, especially the area from tab/escape to 4/'r' gets damaged (i smoke 'left handed'), causing keys to lock in the end...
A glitch a day keeps the bugs away.
Jelly? Perhaps today's puny, mushy keyboards would stop working properly when confronted with some measly jelly. My keyboard laughs and keeps on clickety clacking along in data input perfection.
I'll stop using it when they pry it away from my cold, dead fingers. If I ever can't interface it with future PCs I may have to stop buying new computers.
Vote Libertarian
Sperm! Everyone gets that over their keyboards, right?
I can confirm that Pepsi is at least as good as Coke, possibly better, at ruining keyboards.
This article is way out of date, most keyboards aren't worth money anymore - they're disposable items. I buy a new one every few months because keep smashing the old one's - its a great tension relief, especially for Windows. Just find a cheap brand of keyboard that you like the feel of and keep buying the same one, theres no need for this fancy crap.
This comment does not represent the views or opinions of the user.
There was program on the BBC the showed how potentially dangerous eating at your desk is. They took samples from the journalists desk, and a toilet from Glastonbury Festivals after it had been used/abused for three days (think steaming pile of shit and piss). There was nearly 100x more dangerous bacteria on the desk than on the toilet seat.
Scared of flying, pointy things snce 1979!
Well, you live anyway.
Indeed, why are you wasting your time reading this?
/. should probably have a Humour section (perhaps with Python-style cartoon banner instead of the usual logo) so you can disable it in your preferences, but personally, I'd much rather read this than another story about RFID, Google or Steve Jobs scratching his ass in a particular way.
/. for bringing a little smile to my Monday morning - trust me, some of us need the humour fix.
Lighten up, it's humour - granted,
You want serious 'News for Nerds'? There's plenty of other stories on the front page - you could try; - NASA's Plans for the Future,
- Open Source Java? or even
- ASIMO and Research Celebrated in Brussels -
hey, how about that?
Just because you don't want to read it doesn't mean others don't - some of us are slogging through the early hours of cube life and want a little comic relief about how Johnny Slashdotter once destroyed his computer with a kiwi fruit.
Shame on Slashdot for not having a humour section you can block in your Preferences, but shame on you for not only assuming that an article titled The Worst Foods to Eat Over a Keyboard was going to be an accurately-calculated technological critique, but for then wasting even more of your time by bothering to post a comment about "who cares?". I'm here, in a cube-farm, being bored to tears by the most tedious job you can possibly imagine and I'd like to thank
Dealing with lawyers would be a lot less tedious if they all looked like Casey Novak.
Not a food per se but a friend of mine has destroyed several keyboards when late night post-pub gaming has turned into uncontrolled vomiting.
(And yes an actual friend opposed to a scapegoat alter ego.)
Meanwhile, I know a guy with an ergo-centric, never going to get carpal tunnel syndrome, wierdo layout with the keyboard split, that he paid $59 for. He has to replace it every 18 months or so. He even has a no food or drink policy in his computer room. And nobody can type on it, not even him.
Keyboards are one of the few things with computers where cheaper is better. Save the extra money for ram.
Rosco: "If brains were gunpowder, Enos couldn't blow his nose."
How about a $2000 laptop? You wouldn't still care?
{click}-{click}-{click}{click}{click}-{click}-{cli ck}{click}-{click}
Wifey: God Damn it Bill, I told you, no more teens!
{click}{click}-{click}-{click}{click}{click}-{clic k}
Wifey: Or transvestites!
{click}-{click}-{click}-{click}{click}-{click}
Wifey: That's better, read the news.
Rosco: "If brains were gunpowder, Enos couldn't blow his nose."
oh man :<
<anamexis> I was opening a coke, right
--> Beefpile (~mbeefpile@cloaked.wi.rr.com) has joined #themacmind
<anamexis> and it exploded
<anamexis> ALMOST all over my keyboard
<anamexis> but I got it away just in time
<-- Beefpile has quit (sick fuckers)
<anamexis>
This happened to a friend of mine:
:)
At a LAN party he accidentially spilled a coke can over his keyboard.
Luckily he had a second one to replace it. So he placed the new one where the old one was and simply turned around the broken keyboard above the new one without thinking.
He sucessfully spilled coke on two keyboards
Stop making that big face!
spaghetti sauce, coffee spill, et al.
s
'et al.' is short for 'et alii'. This translates directly to "and others." However it is only used to refer to people, not things.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Latin_phrase
I think, therefore I am. I think?
Imagine this, you have your father's office laptop (very costly IBM Thinkpad in 1999) on the coffee table running HellBender at a grainy 640x480 (I'm in that grotto with the ceiling guns). You have a small jar of payasam sitting there on the table. It was wrapped in a plastic bag with a couple of rubber bands (it was made the day before and kept in the fridge). I take the jar, open the plastic without looking up from the game. You know , the rubber band snapped and next thing you know the laptop keyboard is coated in sticky COLD payasam with vermicelli sticking to the padded keyboard bottom.
I still get teased by my sister whenever I take any food near her PC when I visit my parents.Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur
when I was 9, on a brand-spankin' new Pet 2001 Professional Computer with 3.0 ROMs and a full-size K/B.
It was right after lunch, and I was showing off to a couple of Australian kids my 1337 programmin' skills, viz:
10 PRINT " IS A DORK"
20 GOTO 10
Went into the other room, got named (older) brother, and dragged him in to see the proggy. He was less than pleased, and expressed such displeasure physically on my back. I had just started to come down with bronchitis, and the combination was too much for my lunch to bear.
I'll never forget the suffering on my father's face when he came home, sat down at the table, and tried for hours to clean that thing.
It never really worked right after that. He even replaced the keyboard, and it still had keys that wouldn't always conncect.
It doesn't even need to be spilled. Just placing one near the keyboard while effervescing is sufficient. Those tiny unseen droplets accumulate in all of the worst places. The board gets sticky, the key motion is screwed, the same as if you spilled it.
There's a better Bash.org quote: (from memory)
Dammit I just spilt man juice all over my keyboard
TMI!! TMI !!!
Eww!!
Oh No! I meant Mango Juice!
Damn that was a bad typo...
I have been a user for about 10 years. This ends Feb 2014. The site's been ruined. I'm off. Dice, FU
Spaghetti Code is worse than spaghetti sauce.
Not that I drink the crap, but my kids do.
:v)
If they spilt it on their keyboards, that would be fine. But, oh no, not good enough for 'em. They have to pick my $100 wireless keyboard to spill it on.
Useful tip: After cleaning, dissolved tracks can be replaced with conductive silver PCB repair paint.
My last keyboard survived 3 coke washes with this technique before they finally killed it off.
Vik
No worries. By now I'd say I have about a glass of beer total sitting in my keyboard (spilled at VARIOUS occasions) and it still works, no problem. Beer seems to be harmless to keyboards.
Anagram("United States of America") == "Dine out, taste a Mac, fries"
Not a food, but my gf spilled it over her keyboard and it essentially melted it.
Ever try washing your hands?
We figured we'd clean up the mess in the morning. Turns out, by morning the spit had eaten its way through the plastic membrane that forms the circuitry in cheap keyboards. Nothing there to clean off -- the circuits were gone. Kinda reminds me of a "stainless carpet" ad, where they admit that their carpet can't withstand battery acid, and show a picture of the holes it will cause.
Coffee is another annoying substance, though not for a keyboard. If you spill it near your case, it will seep up into the groove between the case base and cover. And then dry, forming a very good seal. I once spent about 1/2 hour with a knife trying to cut that seal open.
Hot grits, of course!!
You have a constitutionally protected right to be wrong, and I the right to ignore you.
Please see http://www.snopes.com/cokelore/tooth.asp
I never thought about diet soda before I went on weight watchers. Once I started totaling up the calories from the Mountain Dew I drive almost constantly, it become very apparent that it was a major source of my problems.
Regular (8 fl. oz)
Calories (kcal) 110
x 1.5 fl. oz per can
= 165 Calories
x 3 cans per work day
= 495 Calories
+ ( 32 fl. oz per glass x 2 meals a day)
= 1375 Calories in the average work day
I now drink Diet Coke (which I did, of course, just for the taste of it anyway) and Dt. Mtn Dew exclusively and drink water or unsweet tea if neither choice is available
Never confuse volume with power.