Slashdot Mirror
The Worst Foods to Eat Over a Keyboard
An anonymous reader writes "Pasta? Pizza? Keyboards are often subject to the harshest of conditions -- spaghetti sauce, coffee spill, et al. ZDNet is running a list of worst-food nominations. What is your pick?"
Cause it would stick to every key.
I would say the In-N-Out 16 x 16 burger would be no fun over a keyboard: http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/TexasBurger Guy/InNOut/inout_big.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v207/TexasBurger Guy/InNOut/inoutreceipt_big.jpg
This should be a poll.
Worst option: Cowboyneal.
Best option: Breasts!
Jelly? Perhaps today's puny, mushy keyboards would stop working properly when confronted with some measly jelly. My keyboard laughs and keeps on clickety clacking along in data input perfection.
I'll stop using it when they pry it away from my cold, dead fingers. If I ever can't interface it with future PCs I may have to stop buying new computers.
Vote Libertarian
Sperm! Everyone gets that over their keyboards, right?
There was program on the BBC the showed how potentially dangerous eating at your desk is. They took samples from the journalists desk, and a toilet from Glastonbury Festivals after it had been used/abused for three days (think steaming pile of shit and piss). There was nearly 100x more dangerous bacteria on the desk than on the toilet seat.
Scared of flying, pointy things snce 1979!
Indeed, why are you wasting your time reading this?
/. should probably have a Humour section (perhaps with Python-style cartoon banner instead of the usual logo) so you can disable it in your preferences, but personally, I'd much rather read this than another story about RFID, Google or Steve Jobs scratching his ass in a particular way.
/. for bringing a little smile to my Monday morning - trust me, some of us need the humour fix.
Lighten up, it's humour - granted,
You want serious 'News for Nerds'? There's plenty of other stories on the front page - you could try; - NASA's Plans for the Future,
- Open Source Java? or even
- ASIMO and Research Celebrated in Brussels -
hey, how about that?
Just because you don't want to read it doesn't mean others don't - some of us are slogging through the early hours of cube life and want a little comic relief about how Johnny Slashdotter once destroyed his computer with a kiwi fruit.
Shame on Slashdot for not having a humour section you can block in your Preferences, but shame on you for not only assuming that an article titled The Worst Foods to Eat Over a Keyboard was going to be an accurately-calculated technological critique, but for then wasting even more of your time by bothering to post a comment about "who cares?". I'm here, in a cube-farm, being bored to tears by the most tedious job you can possibly imagine and I'd like to thank
Dealing with lawyers would be a lot less tedious if they all looked like Casey Novak.
How about a $2000 laptop? You wouldn't still care?
{click}-{click}-{click}{click}{click}-{click}-{cli ck}{click}-{click}
Wifey: God Damn it Bill, I told you, no more teens!
{click}{click}-{click}-{click}{click}{click}-{clic k}
Wifey: Or transvestites!
{click}-{click}-{click}-{click}{click}-{click}
Wifey: That's better, read the news.
Rosco: "If brains were gunpowder, Enos couldn't blow his nose."
It's really hard to get your coke from under your keys. Either you have to use a can of compressed air and then you lose most of you coke when it gets shot into the air. Or worse, you try to snort it out of the keys, you are inhaling so hard and fast you are about to pass out, your boss comes in and you have your nose pressed against the crtl key. You try to explain to him that as a linux user you have a hard time pressing crtl+alt+del using just your fingers but the white smudge under you nose gives you away. I've lost countless jobs this way...
That's why I usually turn my keyboard upside down before I lay a line on it, sniff, and turn it back again.
oh man :<
<anamexis> I was opening a coke, right
--> Beefpile (~mbeefpile@cloaked.wi.rr.com) has joined #themacmind
<anamexis> and it exploded
<anamexis> ALMOST all over my keyboard
<anamexis> but I got it away just in time
<-- Beefpile has quit (sick fuckers)
<anamexis>
This happened to a friend of mine:
:)
At a LAN party he accidentially spilled a coke can over his keyboard.
Luckily he had a second one to replace it. So he placed the new one where the old one was and simply turned around the broken keyboard above the new one without thinking.
He sucessfully spilled coke on two keyboards
Stop making that big face!
If you are a left hand typist you might end up with a .uh... Orange dick too...
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur
spaghetti sauce, coffee spill, et al.
s
'et al.' is short for 'et alii'. This translates directly to "and others." However it is only used to refer to people, not things.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Latin_phrase
I think, therefore I am. I think?
There's a better Bash.org quote: (from memory)
Dammit I just spilt man juice all over my keyboard
TMI!! TMI !!!
Eww!!
Oh No! I meant Mango Juice!
Damn that was a bad typo...
I have been a user for about 10 years. This ends Feb 2014. The site's been ruined. I'm off. Dice, FU
Well, the sugar and water in the sprite form molasses when the water dries slowly, and it sticks to your keys. Haven't you ever dropped sprite on your hands? They feel very sticky after a short while. My cure for this, if the keyboard allows it, is a bath with hot water first, then some alcohol. Better use a lot of alcohol to clean thoroughly, then dry it with a hairblower or just leave it somewhere warm. I saved a keyboard with the same symptoms (actually, it was strong nocino liquor, very very sticky keys). This treatment is possible if the patient^Wkeyboard has a separate top with the keys , which you wash; and a plastic film with the electrical contacts, which you don't. You might want to douse a cotton ball in alcohol and clean the plastic film too.
"I think it would be a good idea!"
Gandhi, about Internet Security
We figured we'd clean up the mess in the morning. Turns out, by morning the spit had eaten its way through the plastic membrane that forms the circuitry in cheap keyboards. Nothing there to clean off -- the circuits were gone. Kinda reminds me of a "stainless carpet" ad, where they admit that their carpet can't withstand battery acid, and show a picture of the holes it will cause.
Coffee is another annoying substance, though not for a keyboard. If you spill it near your case, it will seep up into the groove between the case base and cover. And then dry, forming a very good seal. I once spent about 1/2 hour with a knife trying to cut that seal open.