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Google Plans To Destroy Unindexed Information

Posted by Zonk on from the bow-before-the-google-rays-pitiful-mortals dept.

linolium writes "Executives at Google, the rapidly growing online-search company that promises to 'organize the world's information,' announced Monday the latest step in their expansion effort: a far-reaching plan to destroy all the information it is unable to index. 'Book burning is just the beginning," said Google co-founder Larry Page. 'This fall, we'll unveil Google Sound, which will record and index all the noise on Earth. Is your baby sleeping soundly? Does your high-school sweetheart still talk about you? Google will have the answers.'" FYI; it's The Onion, so yes, it's a joke.

6 of 319 comments (clear)

  1. My God. by David+Rolfe · · Score: 0, Flamebait

    Fuck you Zonk.

    Yeah, that's about as cerebral as I can get right now.

    --
    Read Heinlein's 1953 Revolt in 2100, now more than ever.
  2. Re:As if dupes weren't enough... by cheesee · · Score: 0, Flamebait

    I see it as an intelligence test for all the readers of slashdot.

    You failed.

    --
    Got Shadowrun? Awakened Worlds
  3. Re:In other news by Virak · · Score: 0, Flamebait

    How about they just get rid of Zonk? I think the quality of slashdot would dramtically increase if this dumbass got removed. And by 'removed' I mean killed. Violently.

  4. Annoying by HunterZ · · Score: 1, Flamebait

    I don't mind /. posting links to humorous articles, but I find it inappropriate and unprofessional to mislead (intentionally or otherwise) readers into thinking that the articles are serious. At the very least, humor should have been listed as the primary category for this article insteasd of Google.

    I don't mean to sound like a troll, but I can't help feeling that the mods are experiencing a near-constant desire to start flame wars lately. Is it too much to ask that we at least try to raise the bar a little - say, to the level of semi-intelligent discourse on noteworthy topics? (*braces for a barrage of "dude, you're obviously on the wrong site" replies*)

    Ah crap, the article succeeded in baiting a flame out of me!

    --
    Arguing about vi versus Emacs is like arguing whether it's better to make fire by rubbing sticks or banging rocks.
  5. Re:Is this a wakeup call? by HardCase · · Score: 0, Flamebait

    Actually, the obsession is on the /. editors' part. Given the "editing" pattern that Zonk has exhibited, I suspect that any suggestion from this post that "the community" is obsessing over Google is purely accidental.

    The /. editors are the lead lemmings - the fanboys merely follow.

    -h-

  6. Re:As if dupes weren't enough... by vena · · Score: 0, Flamebait

    do they offer charter flights to this fantasyland you live in?