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Monster Cables Pushes Around the Wrong Small Company
Alien54 writes "Audioholics has a fun read regarding a recent legal dustup involving Monster Cables. The well-known (some might say notorious) cabling company sent a cease and desist letter to Blue Jeans Cable over a supposed patent violation. What the Monster folks couldn't have known was that Blue Jeans president Kurt Denke used to be a lawyer. His response is as humorous as it is thorough. ' Let me begin by stating, without equivocation, that I have no interest whatsoever in infringing upon any intellectual property belonging to Monster Cable. Indeed, the less my customers think my products resemble Monster's, in form or in function, the better ... If there is more than one such connector design in actual use by Monster Cable as to which appropriation of trade dress is alleged, of course, I will require this information for each and every such design. On the basis of what I have seen, both in the USPTO documents you have sent and the actual appearance of Monster Cable connectors which I have observed in use in commerce, it does not appear to me that Monster Cable is in a position to advance a nonfrivolous claim for infringement of these marks.'"
I read every word of that rather long article, and all I have to say is "OWNED". Wow. Normally I refer from such Internet slang, but I really believe in my heart that it applies here.
Slashdot reposts a story found on Gizmodo that Gizmodo found on Digg that was first seen on reddit that...
The best line of the reply has to be "Not only am I unintimidated by litigation; I sometimes rather miss it."
Dear Monster Lawyers,
The mention of similarity between my company and yours makes me throwup in my mouth a little. Your threats are empty and vague. You provided no details to your patent hissyfit.
If you're actually attempting to prove you own a patent on the RCA connector, then fuck you and the horse you rode in on.
Sincerely,
Kurt Denke
I think this deserves an "OH SNAP!"
My Sysadmin Blog
Yes, it might upset a mime when a blank tape is played too loudly.
I have not enjoyed a letter like that in a long while.
I think I have a new rule, right after "never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line!" "Never challenge a former litigator who misses his old job."
You mean that Monster Cables running to Bose speakers WON'T make me cool?
SJW: Someone who has run out of real oppression, and has to fake it.
Wouldn't the RCA connector patented by.... oh, I don't know.... RCA?
File under 'M' for 'Manic ranting'
No, it's not.
This is someone attempting to bully using the patent system, it is not the fault of the patent system at all.
I would argue that these kind of people would threaten under some other pretense.
The Kruger Dunning explains most post on
It looks like a porcupine, and boy does it growl like a porcupine. Monster Cable Products Inc, would you like to try a bite and see if it tastes like a porcupine?
Monster is hiring a paralegal - bet you would be kept busy! https://jobs-monstercable.icims.com/monstercable_jobs/jobs/candidate/job.jsp?jobid=1503&mode=view
Going on means going far
Going far means returning
...most people won't be able to tell the difference between that and lamp cord without an oscilloscope. Actually, outside slashdot, most people wouldn't be able to tell the difference even with an oscilloscope. They'd just look at it and ask, "WTF is this thing and why is it in my living room?"He's getting rather old, but he's a good mouse.
Thanks for the warning. You've convinced me not to use coat hangers in my setup.
"Seek first to understand." - Socrates
How ironic is it, that a company known for it's cables really only does good work in wireless?
ADVENTURERS! - ANTIHERO FOR HIRE - CARDMASTER CONFLICT
ACTUALLY, outside of slashdot most people wouldn't be able to tell the difference between a lamp cord and oscilloscope...
To really experience the Monster advantage, you have to run a green magic marker along the wire. I've got one I'll sell for $350 + s/h :)
There are no tiger attacks in my area and it's all because this rock I'm holding keeps the tigers away.
LOL!
Those are probably one of the biggest scams yet from Monster.
Prove it.
I mean, its how the internet works, and god knows here's a lot of "noise" on the line, yet my text files sent over instant messengers are accurate :)
Mabye urs r, but mine hav obvius signl 2 noiz isues. It muzt b teh cabels, and not ne problams with are skool sistems.
My taxes are complex enough without having to qualify my sale of old cables at a yard sale as a capital loss, thank you.
Your ad here. Ask me how!
You obviously don't understand digital. Digital is all ones and zero's. If you have a kink in the cable, because it is made cheaply, then the 0's, being as they are round, can slip around the kink's, but the 1's, having sharp edges, pile up.
What are we going to do tonight Brain?
Nah, nah. It's "Poned." As in, "Ponied." ...PONIES!!!
Just have Kurt write a letter to them too.
Weaselmancer
rediculous.
When was the last time you heard an elderly gentleman say "get off my yard" in a civil voice to a bunch of rowdy teenagers?!
I'd be inclined to do so, but punctuate my civil voice with a few shotgun blasts in their general direction.
You are in a maze of twisty little passages, all alike.
...most people won't be able to tell the difference between that and lamp cord without an oscilloscope. Actually, outside slashdot, most people wouldn't be able to tell the difference even with an oscilloscope. They'd just look at it and ask, "WTF is this thing and why is it in my living room?" Wrong! In this post-9/11 control-by-fear world, the average person would take one look at an oscilloscope and run away screaming that there is a BOMB in their HOUSE!Coding with assembly is like playing with Legos. Coding an application in assembly is like building a car with Legos.
You mean you haven't bought a high speed DSL cable, which is a two-wire phone cable going between the DSL modem and the wall jack? It makes pictures and videos downloaded over the internet so much more realistic. It's like the brea^Wimages come alive!
Now I need to get a Monster High Speed IEEE 1284 printer cable -- it's only 35 bucks. I'm sure my Centronics printer will be far faster, and the pictures more vibrant!
I might be wrong, but I have no recollection of having ever gotten an erection from reading a legal letter before.
Pug
An Invisible Entity of Vast Power whose existence must be taken on faith alone: Liberal Media