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Spammers Announce World War III

schliz writes with the stub of a disheartening article at IT News: "Hackers are deluging web users with malware-laden spam claiming that World War III has started following a US invasion of Iran. Security experts warned [yesterday] that spam emails with subject lines including 'Third World War has begun,' '20000 US Soldiers in Iran,' and 'US Army crossed Iran's borders' have been intercepted. The emails contain links to a malicious webpage that displays what appears to be a video player showing the mushroom cloud of a nuclear explosion."

104 of 334 comments (clear)

  1. That spam was shopped by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    I can tell from the text and seeing quite a few spams in my time.

    1. Re:That spam was shopped by stoolpigeon · · Score: 5, Funny

      the shadows are all off too

      --
      It's hard to believe that's how Micronians are made. Why don't we see it right now by having you both kiss one another?
  2. Breaking news! by bigstrat2003 · · Score: 5, Insightful

    This just in: malware propagators have learned that sending a mass e-mail that will grab the attention of anyone who reads it is the best way to spread malware. More at 11.

    --
    "16MB (fuck off, MiB fascists)" - The Mighty Buzzard
    1. Re:Breaking news! by pitchpipe · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Yup. At least they're doing something new and interesting instead of trying to enlarge my P3N!$, or send a high ranking official in Nigeria my money. I hate spam as much as the next guy, but a least this is fucking different.

      --
      Look where all this talking got us, baby.
    2. Re:Breaking news! by ShieldW0lf · · Score: 5, Funny

      This just in: The US and its allies, having established the capacity to censor the entire middle east during the recent destruction of undersea cables, is now sowing misinformation across the internet coupled to a malware payload. Billions of emails sent in this fashion will create enough noise to render all information that doesn't come through official highly suspect.

      --
      -1 Uncomfortable Truth
    3. Re:Breaking news! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

      This just in, the US invades Iran with 12,000,000 troops and nuclear bazookas. Click here to see exclusive footage!

    4. Re:Breaking news! by Wrath0fb0b · · Score: 5, Interesting

      This isn't new or interesting -- it's a classic pump and dump, most likely on the price of oil.

      (1) Buy oil futures
      (2) Pump spam/disinformation about a US military strike in Iran.
      (2a) Do this when US/Israeli officials are making strong statements
      (2b) because Iran has just tested some missiles
      (3) Watch the price of oil go up 4-5% in a day http://www.bloomberg.com/energy/
      (4) (Sell your oil futures at a) Profit!

      Yawn . . .

    5. Re:Breaking news! by The+FNP · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Or you could just buy oil futures and let it go up on its own since Americans can't let go of their Suburbans, Tahoes, and Hummers, and Toyota can't make priusi fast enough.

      --The FNP

    6. Re:Breaking news! by LandDolphin · · Score: 5, Funny

      That's why we need to get the Government out of the Economy. Things like that would not happen in a free market!

      --
      Spelling and Grammar errors have been added to this post for your enjoyment
    7. Re:Breaking news! by maxume · · Score: 3, Insightful

      Your comment is delightfully self-contradictory.

      --
      Nerd rage is the funniest rage.
    8. Re:Breaking news! by inkyblue2 · · Score: 3, Insightful

      oil futures aren't exactly a junk stock. good luck making an impact on those prices with a spam email campaign. there's a reason they usually target little stuff you've never heard of.

    9. Re:Breaking news! by HiThere · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Actually, it isn't. A single Prius might not use much gas compared to a single Hummer, but lots and lots of Priuses still use lots and lots of gas.

      A workable solution is not obvious, but it *is* clear that we aren't heading for one. Electric vehicles would work if there was a decent source of electricity. Such are possible, but progress in that direction appears slow and diffuse. The real stumbling block seems to be how to store large quantities of electricity, as the desirable ways of generation seem to all be intermittent. (I'm not including nuclear fission, as I consider that to be a "last resort" kind of thing, though if one allows breeder reactors it's probably better than coal.)

      --

      I think we've pushed this "anyone can grow up to be president" thing too far.
    10. Re:Breaking news! by drinkypoo · · Score: 4, Informative

      The problem with the Prius is the energy cost of battery production. While the study that came out a while back drew a nonsensical conclusion, it does appear that the lifetime energy cost of the Prius is similar to that of a Hummer.

      Supposedly this problem will be greatly mitigated when the new battery plant opens in Fremont, CA. (IIRC it was Fremont, anyway.)

      Yes, if one allows breeders nuclear is certainly better than coal; coal puts absolute craploads of nuclear material (including a small percentage of fissile uranium) into the atmosphere; in fact, so much that if you could extract it and use it in nuclear reactors (it is mostly thorium, followed by non-fissile uranium) it would produce more energy than the coal burned.

      Coal is horrible, nuclear is potentially not so terrible, but without breeders is definitely pretty foul. Anyway there are two feasible sources of electricity available to us right now: Small-scale wind farms are cheap and easy to build and attach to the grid, and small vertical wind turbines could be installed on almost any roof and grid-tied, and photovoltaic solar panels pay back the energy cost of their production in less than seven years, and have been known to do so for over thirty years.

      Solar is kind of dirty, but the wind turbines can be made out of almost anything. And a lot of the dirtiness of solar production is involved in the energy input. But the whole point of the exercise is producing more energy output which requires a minimum additional investment in energy consumption and pollution - so long that it can be done at an acceptable environmental cost.

      --
      "You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
    11. Re:Breaking news! by mortonda · · Score: 2, Funny

      I think Iran would be well aware of an attack, what with all the bombs going off... ;)

    12. Re:Breaking news! by zippthorne · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Yeah, but that increase has been priced in for months. If you want to make profit now you have to change the game a little.

      --
      Can you be Even More Awesome?!
    13. Re:Breaking news! by Stuy+2+MIT · · Score: 2, Informative

      On one hand, I completely agree with the sentiment of the poster - it's ridiculous to think that a spam campaign can affect a futures market - an average investor doesn't have access to such markets, and doesn't even have enough capital to trade a single oil futures contract.
      On the other hand, though, I've seen rumors of this sort achieve exactly that result. On March 27th, 2007, around 5PM ET, a rumor was spread all over the wire services that Iran had fired on an US Navy ship in the Persian Gulf. The futures markets were closed, and electronic trading was very thin, so because of this rumor, the futures prices was taken all the way from $63 to $68 a barrel, almost 10% - in less than 5 minutes!! Within 15 minutes, though, the news spread that this rumor was not confirmed, and after 15 minutes of frenetic trading, the prices settled back to around $64 (I guess a dollar of a risk premium was priced in, just in case!). Within those 15 minutes, even with the markets closed, millions of dollars changed hands. Here's a link to a story from that day - http://uk.reuters.com/article/oilRpt/idUKN2722461720070327 . Predictably, no one knows where the rumor came from, yet someone profited quite handsomely off of it.

    14. Re:Breaking news! by Paranatural · · Score: 5, Informative

      I'm tired of this crap about Prius being the same lifetime energy cost as a Hummer. It's total bunk, and here's why: The Hummer's energy cost is in moving a giant object around inefficiently, which expends a lot of energy (Gasoline). The Prius's energy cost is creating it's batteries, which it then uses to move it around a lot more efficiently. However, when the lifetime of the Prius is over, all that energy isn't wasted. The batteries don't disappear. They are still there and can easily (And it's incredibly cost-efficient to do so) be recycled. Thus the 'total energy cost' of the next set of batteries is drastically lower.

      So yes, the initial 'startup cost' of the batteries is high, but thereafter the batteries can be recycled an theoretically infinite number of times, which brings it's 'total lifetime energy cost' far below what a Hummer could ever expect.

    15. Re:Breaking news! by drinkypoo · · Score: 4, Informative

      Those wind turbines are LOUD. Let me put one in your back yard and you'll run screaming from the house in less than 24hrs. ... ask the bird population how much they like us sticking a bunch of food processor blades into the air?

      FUD, FUD, FUD.

      Modern wind turbines are neither shaped like a propeller, nor do they operate at high speeds. Consequently, they don't make much noise, either.

      The most efficient designs are all vertical turbines, many of which actually operate at fairly low RPMs, and some of which were used by the ancient Romans. So actually, ancient wind turbines didn't have these problems either.

      --
      "You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
    16. Re:Breaking news! by drinkypoo · · Score: 2, Interesting

      However, when the lifetime of the Prius is over, all that energy isn't wasted. The batteries don't disappear. They are still there and can easily (And it's incredibly cost-efficient to do so) be recycled. Thus the 'total energy cost' of the next set of batteries is drastically lower.

      The energy cost of recycling the batteries is actually not drastically lower either; much of the cost of manufacturing the Prius batteries is in the shipping costs. Guess what they're doing to do when they recycle batteries? It's cheaper to do it almost anywhere but in the US due to environmental restrictions.

      the batteries can be recycled an theoretically infinite number of times

      heh heh.

      Nothing is free, anyway. The recycling process is not just shaking some pixie dust on the old batteries.

      --
      "You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
    17. Re:Breaking news! by drinkypoo · · Score: 3, Insightful

      The nuclear waste issue still hasn't changed, until someone finds a way to filter out the Radio Active stuff from the Non Radio Active stuff, nuclear waste is f'ing dangerous.

      Breeder reactors make that waste dramatically less dangerous and reduce the half-life to something potentially manageable on a human time scale.

      --
      "You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
    18. Re:Breaking news! by drinkypoo · · Score: 2, Interesting

      I hate to double-reply, too, but are those batteries actually going to be used in the next generation of electric car? The answer of course is probably not. They will be used to replace battery packs in existing cars: by the time these battery packs are ready for recycling, they'll be moving on to a new kind of battery. And you have to include the cost of battery recycling in the ongoing lifetime cost of the vehicle. If you assume that it will last 300,000 miles (not impossible I guess) then you're going to have to service the batteries at least once in that period, further raising the lifetime energy cost of the vehicle. Maybe they'll put the recycled batteries into some pissed off golf carts, though.

      --
      "You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
    19. Re:Breaking news! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Paranatural,

      I'm sick of all these soap box idiots forgetting about the costs of SHIPPING!!!!

      Shipping parts around the world costs energy, and pollutes.

      Also, tell me where these batteries will be recycled? (More pollution due to shipping)
      How many batteries will you use throughout the lifecycle of the vehicle? (More pollution due to shipping)

      As the initial poster stated:

      Supposedly this problem will be greatly mitigated when the new battery plant opens in Fremont, CA. (IIRC it was Fremont, anyway.)

      Fremont is closer, thus SHIPPING costs are mitigated.

      Anyone who leaves shipping costs out of the equation, is naive.

  3. How the hell... by HerculesMO · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Did spam make it to the front page?

    It has to be a really slow news day if we get an article explaining what is in specific pieces of spam.

    I'm waiting patiently for Slashdot to post the Nigerian folks that always email for the millions they have to give away. Because you know -- that is real news. For nerds. Stuff that matters.

    --
    The price is always right if someone else is paying.
    1. Re:How the hell... by Michael+O-P · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Seriously. This is a routine virus, and a routine social exploit. This doesn't even qualify as news that doesn't matter, because then it would have to be news.

      --
      I'm Peggy.
    2. Re:How the hell... by urcreepyneighbor · · Score: 5, Funny

      It has to be a really slow news day if we get an article explaining what is in specific pieces of spam.

      I'm a fan of the subjects. Here's a handful I've received recently:

      • Satify your spouses bed needs easier
      • Obama found dead in shock accident
      • shaman like skills
      • Love package at a low price
      • Please your lassie like never before!
      • Girls will be shocked at your new size
      • Bang her till she passes out
      • Have the pecker of her dreams
      • Natalie Portman shaves again
      • Bomb her womb from your huge cannon!

      It's basic marketing / copywriting.

      --
      "The fight for freedom has only just begun." - Geert Wilders
    3. Re:How the hell... by Klaus_1250 · · Score: 3, Funny

      Natalie Portman spam ... you lucky bastard.

      --
      It only takes one man to change the Wisdom of the Crowd to Tyranny of the Masses.
    4. Re:How the hell... by Dogtanian · · Score: 5, Funny

      Natalie Portman shaves again

      I'm glad to hear that, I never really liked her with the beard.

      --
      "Slashdot - News and Chat Sites Deviant". (Click "homepage" link above for details).
    5. Re:How the hell... by Duncan+Blackthorne · · Score: 4, Funny
      • Bomb her womb from your huge cannon!

      I've never seen that one before -- and it's simultaneously the funniest euphemism for that I've heard in a while, and the most shockingly wrong way to put that!

    6. Re:How the hell... by theantipop · · Score: 4, Funny
      My spam is praying on my low self-esteem. Here's a couple I received in the past week:
      • What a stupid face you have here
      • You look really stupid

      *sigh*

    7. Re:How the hell... by SPY_jmr1 · · Score: 4, Funny

      My spam is praying on my low self-esteem. Here's a couple I received in the past week:

      • What a stupid face you have here
      • You look really stupid

      *sigh*

      Strong Bad must be ramping up his spammertisments again.

    8. Re:How the hell... by girasquid · · Score: 3, Interesting

      I started up a twitter account for some of the weirder ones I got: http://twitter.com/spamtitles

    9. Re:How the hell... by wild_quinine · · Score: 5, Funny
      My favourite spam ever came on a real stinker of a day at work. You know the kind, nothing goes right, people fuck you over, you're in work all day to come away worse off than when you went in... It was that sort of day. Then I got this spam, which simply said:

      'Louder screaming is only the beginning'

      That may be the one and only spam that made my day better.

    10. Re:How the hell... by DarkOx · · Score: 4, Interesting

      The most invoative one I saw slip by my filter recently was:

      Increase the effectiveness of your copulation organ

      I found this troubling in that the only word I could safely blacklist on our corporate mail filters is probably

      copulation

      I can't imagine anyone except maybe the HR department needing to send work related message with that word in the subject, and even then I can't imagine it would be hit our public MX.
      If copulation could be eliminated then blocking a spam like this will only be possible via the statistical analysis of the entire message; sure this entire specific subject might be filterable but not the individual words.
      Unless something is a miss in the headers its going to get by.

      It made me wonder if the doom and gloom folks might be correct in that SPAM will make traditional mail realy useless. Sadly SPF and related methods are not an option as we just can't count on our customers to implement it and risk not being about to exchange mail with them. Sure if a problem is discovered whitelists can be used but by then you may have lost an account.

      The other interesting thing is that would anyone educated enough to have the vocabulary to required understand that subject be ignorant enough to respond? I know the economics of SPAM are such that even if 1 in a million people bite, its worth it but as that first number approches 0 its gotta stop being worth while somewhere.

      --
      Repeal the 17th Amendment TODAY! Also Please Read http://www.gnu.org/philosophy/right-to-read.html
    11. Re:How the hell... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      The other interesting thing is that would anyone educated enough to have the vocabulary to required understand that subject be ignorant enough to respond?

      An interesting question, undoubtedly the forte of many an erudite scholar, but by this point in your post I was far to enthralled by my quest for illicit viagra to ponder its myriad complexities.

    12. Re:How the hell... by ponraul · · Score: 3, Funny

      Then, I take it you're a big fan of Spamusement.

    13. Re:How the hell... by bursch-X · · Score: 4, Funny

      That's no spam, that's your girlfriend.

      --
      There are two rules for success:
      1. Never tell everything you know.
    14. Re:How the hell... by inkyblue2 · · Score: 3, Funny

      the most shockingly wrong way to put that

      yeah, cannons don't shoot bombs.

    15. Re:How the hell... by zobier · · Score: 5, Funny

      Just another thought, what if they were to start using marketing buzzwords like "Total interactive throughput"? Not only could they bypass your filter but most executives wouldn't be able to tell it from legitimate communication.

      --
      Me lost me cookie at the disco.
    16. Re:How the hell... by Katalyst23 · · Score: 2, Funny

      The most wtf spam I've been sent so far is: "I know what females do on a farm. NEVER leave them there abandoned!"

      --
      It's turtles all the way down!
  4. Hmm by Aussenseiter · · Score: 5, Funny

    World War III is starting? Oh god, I still haven't received my check from that Nigerian prince! And where's my viagra?

    1. Re:Hmm by mikael · · Score: 5, Funny

      Survivalist Suppliers announces - buy a lifetimes supply of Viagra for your mountain forest bunker today. What are you going to do when the black gold runs out - you won't be able to drive to the pharmacy then. One large box lasts 5 years and only costs $99.99. Buy a lifetimes supply and get an extra 50% absolutely free. Cash payments only.

      --
      Vintage computer adverts: http://www.vintageadbrowser.com/computers-and-software-ads
    2. Re:Hmm by Chris+Burke · · Score: 4, Funny

      World War III is starting? Oh god, I still haven't received my check from that Nigerian prince! And where's my viagra?

      Yeah, because that's the first thing I'm going to be worried about when WWIII starts: Boners.

      Though I guess it is a legitimate concern, due to the widespread boner shortage in the states in WWII, which didn't end until after the war when the market was flooded with them.

      --

      The enemies of Democracy are
    3. Re:Hmm by Maxo-Texas · · Score: 4, Funny

      See, we have to preserve our purity. of. essence. and repopulate the planet.

      --
      She was like chocolate when she drank... semi-sweet at first and then increasingly bitter.
    4. Re:Hmm by Anonymous+Cowpat · · Score: 3, Funny

      Mr. President; we must not allow a mine-shaft gap!

      --
      FGD 135
    5. Re:Hmm by Oktober+Sunset · · Score: 3, Funny

      Don't worry, once the mutations start there will will be plenty of 8' tall women.

    6. Re:Hmm by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      If you buy a lifetime supply why do you need the 50% extra?

    7. Re:Hmm by hack++slash · · Score: 4, Funny

      "there will be plenty of 8' tall women."

      Death by snoo snoo?

      --
      To do something right, you often have to roll up your sleeves and get busy.
    8. Re:Hmm by Oktober+Sunset · · Score: 4, Funny

      hmm, I was just pondering, and living underground, eating crap food, knowing only a few other hideous looking people, for the average basement dwelling nerd, the end of the world wouldn't be must different. The only change would be the constant sex to repopulate the world, so all in all the end of the world would greatly improve most nerds lives.

    9. Re:Hmm by Walkingshark · · Score: 3, Funny

      You can't fight in here! This is the war room!

      --
      The world you experience is only a close approximation of reality.
    10. Re:Hmm by dlanod · · Score: 2, Funny

      Mein Shaft!!!

      (It all comes back to the Viagra jokes...)

    11. Re:Hmm by mcmonkey · · Score: 3, Funny

      If I end up as the last male on the planet and must single handedly repopulate the planet...

      If you're doing it single handedly, you're not going to produce much of a repopulation.

  5. Repercussions by TheMeuge · · Score: 5, Interesting

    I wonder what the possible effects of a coordinated disinformation attack of such nature would be, if it managed to deliver said news to a large segment of the world's population (that have access to email). If such an act was coupled with a successful hacking operation on even one of the major news network's websites, serious consequences may erupt.

    1. Re:Repercussions by DarkOx · · Score: 2, Funny

      free cheddar

      As long as you have a plan to stop the barbarions from dyeing it yellow, you have my full support.

      --
      Repeal the 17th Amendment TODAY! Also Please Read http://www.gnu.org/philosophy/right-to-read.html
  6. I found one of these this morning in my inbox by mzs · · Score: 2, Insightful

    I simply deleted it, just like all the other spam. About once or twice a month I see a clever newish kind of spam subject. Tell me again why this particular spam meme hit the homepage of /.?

  7. Doesn't sound like spam... by damn_registrars · · Score: 3, Interesting

    Doesn't spam generally imply that something is being sold? Granted, this unsolicited email could be a way for the spammers to recruit systems to their bot-nets to push out more spam, but there's no indication in the summary that there is any actual attempt to sell something here.

    --
    Damn_registrars has no butt-hole. Damn_registrars has no use for a butt-hole.
    1. Re:Doesn't sound like spam... by ScentCone · · Score: 4, Informative

      Doesn't spam generally imply that something is being sold?

      Bot nets are used to push out more malware-pushing content, the better to grow the bot net. These can be used very effectively to extort cash from web site operators by means of a site-debilitating distributed denial of service attacks. Many bot nets are used to try hugely random (and somewhat successful) SQL injection attacks from all sorts of random IP addresses, the better to target specific users of specific web sites with JS-based malware iFrames, etc. The days of just trying to get you to buy something are ... quaint, now. The good ol' days.

      --
      Don't disappoint your bird dog. Go to the range.
    2. Re:Doesn't sound like spam... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Informative

      The standard definition of spam is "unsolicited bulk email". Remember, it's about consent, not content.

  8. Google could help by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Like their "report phishing" email flag, a similar "report virus/trojan link" button could help a lot of people, tie this to their badware project and testing the reported site (if x number of users report the same mail)
    and it could do a lot for cutting down bot traffic targeted at GMail users
    takes me 2 seconds to check a mail (they are easy to spot over the Viagra/Penis spam) call it "distributed malware reporting"

    nearly everyday i get multiple emails with a provocative title that contains a link leading to a malware distribution point
    Google could help their entire userbase in this regard

  9. This is the way the world ends by hansamurai · · Score: 4, Funny

    Not with a bang but a can of luncheon meat.

  10. Slashdot is just a good corporate citizen. by myCopyWrong · · Score: 5, Funny

    Be sure you filter out any email about Iran to help out Uncle Sam. Oh yeah, buy war bonds and get back to wark.

  11. GWASTED by Stanistani · · Score: 4, Funny

    This gives me a new hope.

    Now we can divert some of the resources from the Global War On Terror (GWOT) and fight the Global War Against Spam, Terror, & Erectile Dysfunction (GWASTED).

    1. Re:GWASTED by Chris+Burke · · Score: 3, Funny

      GWASTED

      Don't mind if I do!

      --

      The enemies of Democracy are
    2. Re:GWASTED by Gewalt · · Score: 3, Funny

      gWasted.....Wait... free beer with text ads on the labels? oh fuck ya, count me in

      --
      Modding Trolls +1 inciteful since 1999
  12. Easy by geekoid · · Score: 4, Interesting

    this is is particularly eye catching, given current work events. Since it is different, many people will click on it anyways.
    I know some people who I will be sending an email to about this story so they don't click on it.

    --
    The Kruger Dunning explains most post on /. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunning%E2%80%93Kruger_effect
    1. Re:Easy by maxume · · Score: 2, Funny

      What's happening at work?

      --
      Nerd rage is the funniest rage.
    2. Re:Easy by geekoid · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Do you realize how many people get angry, and how many conversation turn ugly becasue someone didn't realize it was sarcasm.
      Sarcasm, while funny, is different then a joke.

      Analyzing humor is like dissecting a frog. Few people are interested, and the frog dies of it. - E.B.White

      --
      The Kruger Dunning explains most post on /. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunning%E2%80%93Kruger_effect
  13. Fools by eln · · Score: 5, Funny

    WWIII isn't scheduled to begin for another two weeks, and it's going to involve a fake attack on the US by "Iran" (actually the CIA) followed by a massive "retaliatory strike", not an invasion by any US forces. Can't these spammers get anything right?

    1. Re:Fools by cstdenis · · Score: 2

      Worked for them on 9/11

      --
      1984 was not supposed to be an instruction manual.
    2. Re:Fools by n+dot+l · · Score: 5, Funny

      No, no, no. Two weeks from now Europe, Russia, and Central Asia unite and declare the second Soviet Union. Then the CIA (which is secretly a branch of the KGB) sends secret agents to hijack the International Space Station (secretly insured by the guy that owned the Twin Towers) and crash it onto their own headquarters. After that, Canada, the USA, Mexico, and (just because it'd be weird) Chile unite and invade Iran, at which point the Chinese (who are secretly controlled by New Zealand) nuke us. Then we nuke them. And then the Russians nuke Australia, just for good measure.

      In the mean time, Charlton Heston (who secretly isn't actually dead) has somehow gotten into a light-speed rocket, and...

      Did I miss anything? Oh right, the Antichrist. Well fuck him, this conspiracy theory is already full. Besides, nobody likes Dick Cheney anyway.

    3. Re:Fools by theralfinator · · Score: 3, Insightful

      Okay, this is actually kinda funny. But why would this be modded insightful? I mean seriously now.

  14. Re:Censorship set up? by halsver · · Score: 5, Insightful

    I think you might need to loosen your tinfoil hat there a little bit buddy...

    --
    Roughly half my comments are never submitted. You may be reading the better half...
  15. What obvious poppycock! by Chris+Burke · · Score: 5, Funny

    It's amazing how people can be tricked by something that is on its surface so laughable that it should be dismissed outright!

    After all, how could World War III possibly have started when World War II hasn't even ended yet?! Just because there's no obvious troop movements or visible battles doesn't mean that merged ghosts of Churchill and Roosevelt along with their dark ally Zombie Stalin don't yet wage war against the forces of Hitler's Head and the demon-animated armor of Hirohito! No, you can see the effects of this conflict every day in the fluctuations of the price of milk to the record of the Essex cricket team. So don't believe anything you read about some ludicrous World War III until you see the purple flag of the Undying Allies flying over the White House, indicating our inevitable triumph!

    After that, though, it's fair game.

    --

    The enemies of Democracy are
    1. Re:What obvious poppycock! by rk · · Score: 2, Funny

      You'd watch? Hell, with a name like "Emperor Zombie" you could probably get a leading role!

  16. massively stupid by inode_buddha · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Jesus H Christ, whoever originates this kind of spam is just colossally stupid, for political reasons. No, its not funny. and yes, I'm a USian.

    --
    C|N>K
    1. Re:massively stupid by maxume · · Score: 2, Funny

      What political reasons? Do you think the US government gets its intelligence from Spam?

      Hell, I would think that the paranoid position is that they just go ahead and make it up...

      --
      Nerd rage is the funniest rage.
  17. An offshoot of the penny stock spam? by adamstew · · Score: 2, Interesting

    I wonder if this has something to do with the penny stock spams...you know, spammers send a bunch of emails promoting a penny stock so the price goes up, then they sell the stock while it's up...

    Perhaps, they bought a bunch of oil, sent out a spam about Iran being invaded to get speculators to buy oil, driving the price up, and then cash in?

    They finally filled in the ???

    1. Buy oil
    2. Send out Spam saying Iran has been invaded.
    3. Speculators buy on the "news" (formerly ???)
    4. Profit!

    1. Re:An offshoot of the penny stock spam? by Gat0r30y · · Score: 3, Interesting

      On a serious note i saw a cool article at physorg yesterday about speculation in the oil market. From the article it would appear there is a major oil bubble about to burst. Though I'm certainly no expert in the matter.
      I suspect they just figured a way around some spam filters for a little while. Most anything novel should get by for a while, once it starts getting flagged it should dissipate.

      --
      Prediction: The real iPhone killer is going to be sex robots from Japan. Think about it.
  18. In an effort to immitate spammers... by tOaOMiB · · Score: 4, Funny

    Slashdot posts article containing the words "World War III" in it's headline, hoping this attracts attention. Once users click to "read more" they are ambushed by trolls masquerading as insightful or funny comments, but in fact containing insidious messages....

  19. The Iranians are coming by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    One if by Spam,
    Two if by sea.

  20. Blowing up the Earth? by Sponge+Bath · · Score: 5, Funny

    Crap, that's where I keep all my stuff.

    1. Re:Blowing up the Earth? by H0p313ss · · Score: 2, Funny

      Crap, that's where I keep all my stuff.

      Tell me about it, I just finished renegotiating my mortgage!

      --
      XML is a known as a key material required to create SMD: Software of Mass Destruction
  21. The obligatory "Obligatory" by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Funny
    1. Re:The obligatory "Obligatory" by mrmeval · · Score: 4, Funny

      The sad thing is I offer swords for sale that are airbrushed.

      The sadder thing is people buy them. ;)

      --
      I'd go on a Vegan diet but the delivery time from Vega is too long. --brownkitty
    2. Re:The obligatory "Obligatory" by _Sprocket_ · · Score: 4, Funny

      Do they do white damage?

    3. Re:The obligatory "Obligatory" by geekoid · · Score: 2, Funny

      The saddest thing is you don't have a link!

      --
      The Kruger Dunning explains most post on /. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunning%E2%80%93Kruger_effect
    4. Re:The obligatory "Obligatory" by Emb3rz · · Score: 4, Funny

      I personally prefer to have solid notions. They're more stable, easier to execute.

      |> letslaughbecauseoftypos (tagging beta)

  22. Defining SPAM Re:Doesn't sound like spam... by Essron · · Score: 2, Interesting

    I think SPAM is best defined as any email you receive that you don't want and was sent without your specific permission. The intent of the email is irrelevant.

    I've sent SPAM on behalf of a government agency before (coerced by management after weeks of resistance) and all they wanted to do was give people information they didn't want about lead paint poisoning. AOL blacklisted us as SPAMmers and they were right to do so, even tho their actual motive was just to charge us money to deliver email.

    Another good example is that band's mailing list you signed up for at a bar 4 years ago that refuses to stop telling you how some guy you don't know's new band's fucking Alaskan tour is going. I hate that guy.

  23. Confiscate their computers by clampolo · · Score: 3, Insightful

    Everyone who is a part of a botnet should have their computer confiscated. They are too dumb to be allowed to have one.

    We can easily wipe, the machine's hard drive and then install a new OS and you have a computer to give away to schools.

    Two problems solved at once: one less idiot on the net and a free computer for a school.

  24. is there another one saying Slashdot RIP? by shippo · · Score: 2, Funny

    Because this dreadful front-page topic is quite frankly the last straw with this place. Goodbye....

    1. Re:is there another one saying Slashdot RIP? by rk · · Score: 2, Funny

      Don't let the FIN packet hit your ass on the way out.

  25. Impossible, or highly unlikely for quite some time by EdIII · · Score: 3, Interesting

    A world war is a war affecting the majority of the world's most powerful and populous nations. World wars have spanned several continents, and lasted for years.

    World War III is just not going to happen anytime soon, at least a non-nuclear war. If it is nuclear than everyone is fucked everywhere and it's a moot point. We may go in and destroy Iran, but that is hardly going to escalate into WWIII. Just look at the countries and continents involved.

    Antarctica and the Artic: Hmmmm, last the checked the Intuit peoples and the Penguins did not have some sort of secret alliance and hidden military. Probably not a player in WWIII.

    Australia: Kind of remote. Might contribute troops but hardly the location for WWIII or the political force to cause it either.

    Greenland: Too busy with awesome blond chicks, high tech data centers, and hot spas. Not interested in causing it and no one is interested in attacking it.

    North America - Canada: Highly doubtful. If anything, they will be an innocent bystander that gets hurt when the US gets attacked. Won't start WWIII either.

    North America - United States: Oh, the US will be involved. Bet your ass on that. Could start it too most likely if we have another idiot child president. Will it host the war on its own continent? Probably not. Getting troops and equipment to the US is a heck of a lot harder than Red Dawn made it out to be. Candidate for World War III.

    North America - Mexico: They have problems of their own right now with the drug cartels and political scandals. Don't have anything military wise capable of waging a strategic war away from their own continent. No one is interested in attacking them, and they don't seem to be interested in attacking anyone else either.

    South America - All: Way to involved in their own affairs and completely lack any military infrastructure capable of operations away from their home soil. Other than having a country with a president that likes to verbally attack the US, not much to see here. Who wants to invade and attack them? I dunno either.

    Europe: Look at the countries that make up the EU. They don't want to start anything anywhere. They are far more diplomatic about dealing with the middle east than the US is. I doubt they will be invaded and I don't see them causing World War III either. Took a major chill pill after World War II. They are on break, and don't even get me started on the French.

    Eastern Europe: Still getting on their feet IMO. Lack the resources or the will to put up much of fight for anything. I know there are some tensions between some east european countries and Russia regarding missile defense, but not very likely to start World War III.

    Japan: Too busy making and selling entertainment equipment, cars, and used womens panties. They figured out the best way to wage war was with skyscrapers and advanced technology in products. Next.

    Africa: Yeah, right. They are too busy being butt raped for resources by the rest of the world and dealing with chronic disease and gang rapes of women. Next.

    South East Asia: Not very likely. I can't see any country being invaded or doing the invading.

    North Korea: Will launch a single attack and promptly be totally destroyed within days. Everybody will ignore the rotting corpse and nobody will come to their aid, certainly not China. China would only object if there was a nuclear response to North Korea which is not totally necessary.

    India: More interesting. If anything happens they might take the opportunity to attack Pakistan since they just love each other.

    Russia: Who are they going to fight? US? China? Not until resources become absolutely critical. We got the missile defense deal going, which does remind me of the Cuban Missile crisis, but actuall

  26. Motives for Spam and Country of origin by spineboy · · Score: 2, Interesting

    More than likely, it is just a shock type of attention getting mail. However, what if it is state sponsored spam by another country.
    Obviously, there are countries out there that would like the US&As reputation damaged, and this may help do that. There are countries with states sponsored hackers, trying to hack US government/Pentagon computers, so why wouldn't they also attempt psychological damage as well?

    If you here rumors, over and over again about someones behavior, then you might start to think that the person (or country) might behave that way, and maybe think less of them.

    --
    ..........FULL STOP.
    1. Re:Motives for Spam and Country of origin by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

      Obviously, there are countries out there that would like the US&As reputation damaged, and this may help do that.

      Where have you been for the past seven and a half years? The US's reputation has been shot for some time now.

    2. Re:Motives for Spam and Country of origin by Rigrig · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Obviously, there are countries out there that would like the US&As reputation damaged, and this may help do that.

      I'd say the USA is doing that just fine, they don't need any help.

      --
      **TODO** [X] Steal someone elses sig.
  27. Re:Censorship set up? by Ihmhi · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Right, because once e-mail filters out the messages there's absolutely no way for anyone to get information anymore. Well, except for websites, BBSes, Usenet, television, radio, telephone, letters...

  28. Re:Impossible, or highly unlikely for quite some t by Reality+Master+101 · · Score: 3, Interesting

    Look at the countries that make up the EU. They don't want to start anything anywhere. They are far more diplomatic about dealing with the middle east than the US is. I doubt they will be invaded and I don't see them causing World War III either. Took a major chill pill after World War II. They are on break, and don't even get me started on the French.

    More like they were castrated after WW/II by American Troops being stationed throughout Europe to prevent them from starting yet another war. There is no question WW/III would have happened if the United States hadn't taken over nearly all the military operations in Europe.

    They are diplomatic because that's all the power they have at this point. This is a double-edged sword; Europe is now nearly powerless to start another war, but they're also close to useless when it comes to helping out when military action is really needed.

    (Some younger Europeans will probably be peeved about this post, but they really need to read their own unbelievably bloodthirsty history)

    --
    Sometimes it's best to just let stupid people be stupid.
  29. OK, Here's my top picks from the past week or so. by FilthCatcher · · Score: 5, Funny
    • Reserve in us a means for increase of the member and you quickly will achieve desired result.
    • Make an impression of successful person wearing expensive looking watch.
    • Negroes admire with the of the size - we will surpass them! - not sure whether I should be amused, bemused or deeply offended - probably a combination of all of the above.
    • Say goodbye to your diseases!
    • Increase Your Penis Width (Girth) By upto 20%.
    • Be the master of the universe, with a huge broadsword in your pants?
  30. Silly spammers by Duradin · · Score: 2, Insightful

    It can't be WWIII. We don't declare war anymore. Too many hoops to jump through.

    Iran would be YAPA (Yet Another Police Action).

  31. Making connections out of the info fragments by FeatureBug · · Score: 2, Interesting
    I foresee this major oil bubble serving an extremely useful purpose if Iran really were attacked very soon.

    Let's assume the expected oil price minus all the speculation, is per IEA calculations, around $70-80/barrel. If Iran gets attacked, it is likely they will attempt to block the Straits of Hormuz by destroying passing oil tankers. If they succeed, it will at a stroke remove 60% of world oil supply from the market. The shock of that happening would cause the oil price to spike to well over $200/barrel, with devastating consequences to world stock markets.

    Speculation has already pushed the price up close to $150/barrel. However, the speculative bubble can be quickly and deliberately popped with the help of a trillion dollar hedge fund around the same time that war breaks out and the Straits get blocked. There would be much less of a surge in the oil price.

    Who's to say the big speculators haven't been playing the market for this very purpose, in clever anticipation of upcoming attacks on Iran in September?

    The good news for us is that after it is all over, the oil price should fall back around $70-80.

  32. Re:Impossible, or highly unlikely for quite some t by smoker2 · · Score: 2, Interesting

    You are a complete tosser. The US troops were left in Europe to hold the USSR back, not to prevent another war in Europe. In fact Europe was to be the battleground.
    Firstly, if each EU nation decided to turn on the American troops based in their countries, what are the US going to do ? Bomb their own troops ? (probably, going by past events).
    Secondly, how much does the US spend on its military every day ? And how much of that is spent to maintain defences on foreign soil.
    Seems like the EU gets the best deal financially speaking, and as it's only the US that wants to start wars recently, why should we waste all our cash ?
    As for your last point, the USA has only existed for a couple of centuries. Europe has had nation states for thousands of years. And yet the US seems to be intent on catching up in the bloodthirsty stakes. Only you like to keep it at arms length. Let's see, Iran, Iraq, Israel, Turkey, Afghanistan, Korea and Vietnam to mention a few. There is also the interference in Southern American countries, so I would watch where you point that finger.

  33. Re:Impossible, or highly unlikely for quite some t by maypull · · Score: 5, Interesting

    There is no question WW/III would have happened if the United States hadn't taken over nearly all the military operations in Europe.

    "No question"? Really? [citation needed].

    Perhaps you're thinking about the Morgenthau Plan, which was a primarily economic effort (which only lasted a few years) to "industrially disarm" Germany.

    To the best of my knowledge, the primary reason for the stationing of US troops in Europe was to expand the US sphere of influence here (yes, I'm European) as a bulwark against the Soviets -- with whom relations were already beginning to deteriorate at the close of the war.

    And no, I can't be bothered to dig up references for that, which I suppose makes me a hypocrite but hey, technically I should be working! :)

  34. Good riddance by azzuth · · Score: 2, Funny

    Hopefully it wiped out their computers. Should keep them off the forums long enough for some intelligence to seep back into online discussions...

  35. Re:Impossible, or highly unlikely for quite some t by Reality+Master+101 · · Score: 2, Interesting

    The US troops were left in Europe to hold the USSR back, not to prevent another war in Europe. In fact Europe was to be the battleground.

    It's true that much of the reason was to hold the USSR back (though, let's not forget that Eastern Europe is still Europe), but after two world wars, do you really think the nature of the countries of Europe suddenly turned into peaceful loving countries? Hardly. The United States might've primarily been talking about holding back the USSR from aggressive expansion (which was absolutely a threat), but there was no doubt that Western Europe still had all the old hatreds and desires. You would think they would have learned after WW/I, but they didn't. And they didn't learn after WW/II. They were just forced to learn.

    For some bizarre reason, Europe has now styled itself as always having been this mature, peace loving continent. And I'm not going to get into a worthless debate about the wars of the United States in the 20th century that you'll never agree with. It's fashionable to bash the US, so I highly doubt you'll be objective. I'll just say that the wars the US is involved with have had fundamentally different motivations than the wars of Europe.

    --
    Sometimes it's best to just let stupid people be stupid.