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NASA Names Space Station Treadmill After Colbert
willith writes "The SF Chronicle reports on the results of the International Space Station Node 3 naming contest (which we previously discussed). Comedian and fake-pundit Stephen Colbert conducted a bombastic write-in campaign and repeatedly urged his show's fan base (the 'Colbert Nation') to stuff the ballot box with his name, which resulted in 'Colbert' coming in first in the write-in contest with almost a quarter-million votes. Although the Node 3 component will not be named 'Colbert' — NASA has instead chosen to call it 'Tranquility' — one of the Node 3 components will bear the honor: the second ISS treadmill, which will be installed in Node 3, will be named the Combined Operational Load Bearing External Resistance Treadmill. The formal announcement was made on the air yesterday at 22:30 EDT on the Colbert Report by astronaut Sunita Williams."
I truly do not know what to think about this.
Maybe we could get the toilets named RIAA or something?
I thought serenity was the runner up?
One of our competitors trademarked the term "hypothesis". From now on, we will call them "boneheaded ideas".
How long did it take them to come up with the acronym "Combined Operational Load Bearing External Resistance Treadmill"?
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haha... they pulled that one out of thin air.
Even a stopped clock gives the right time twice a day.
Basically they chose to ignore the poll. The name they chose, "Tranquility", was like in 8th place.
I thought the legit winner was Serenity.
"No matter where you go, there you are." -- Buckaroo Banzai
Nice to see NASA has a sense of humour. Or would that be humor for you folks south of the border?
Going on means going far
Going far means returning
While I think it's cool that his name is appearing in the space station, I think it's idiotic for them to not name the node Colbert. They had a public vote for the name. They allowed write in suggestions. The write in suggestion won because a TV personality made sure to make it a big deal. Name the node Colbert and, maybe, that TV personality will keep NASA in people's minds. If people are thinking about NASA a lot, it will be easier for NASA to do business (get funding, recruit minds, etc., etc., etc.). It's just stupid for them to not name it what the people voted for. What does it cost them? Oh noes! The name of the node isn't something "proper" like Tranquility! Whatever. Such a stupid decision.
Less than five minutes? Seriously, it's a better use for my tax dollars than at least 60% of government spending.
It's not hard to come up with acronyms.
--ANONYMOUS nagging oxymorognic neogeodesic yuppie-man on universal soapbox COWARD of wayward and radical dichotomies.
Among all the choices that weren't being driven by bots or ballot stuffers.
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So, fellow browncoats, we were on the losing side. Still not convinced it was the wrong one though ;)
To be fair, they DID say from the beginning that they reserved the right to pick a name themselves regardless of the poll's outcome.
I suspect that Colbert himself played a big role in this decision. He isn't going to drop out of character to say so, but Colbert-the-pundit is a character, and I imagine Colbert-the-person wasn't entirely comfortable saddling an "important" component of the space program (all ISS contempt aside) with the name of a comedy character. Their final decision still gave his character plenty of mileage -- "the treadmill is the really important part, the 'module' is just a box that the treadmill comes in" -- while preserving a bit of what many would perceive as decorum.
Does anyone know if they are naming it Tranquility after past missions or was the name suggested from Peter F. Hamilton's Night's Dawn Trilogy?
Orwell was an optimist.
one of the Node 3 components will bear the honor: the second ISS treadmill, which will be installed in Node 3, will be named the Combined Operational Load Bearing External Resistance Treadmill.
You better watch your back Article Summary writer. Colbert doesn't take kindly to your type of folk who honor bears.
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Gos Se NASA....
Serenity is what the module should be called.
Liou coe shway duh biao-tze huh hoe-tze duh ur-tze
We Browncoat's wont forget.
Don't rush me, Sonny. You rush a miracle man, you get rotten miracles.
On the contest page, NASA has an explanation of why they chose the name 'Tranquility', as well as a little write-up of the COLBERT thing.
This guy's the limit!
This could have been a real PR coup for NASA but they screwed up.
...democracy is thrown out when it suits. Its not like Colbert was an offensive name. I'd be insulted were i Colbert.
Who knows, it might have been his idea (or his writers') down to the acronym. *I* on the other hand, am insulted. Not surprised (look at the state of national elections in this country) but insulted. And I certainly think the less of NASA for tricking people into thinking that they were listening.
"You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
Nice to know the front lines of human-kind showed at least a little democracy.....
"They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety" Franklin
Why oh why? Why not Serenity? /// Can't Stop the Signal!
NASA has shown a blatant disregard for democracy. They should be bombed and invaded by the US military. Like right now.
Send your spendthrift head of state this
If you're going to be a big showoff and use military time, you could at least get it right. It was at 23:30 EDT. Next time, just say 11:30PM EDT and don't be a douchebag. Over and out.
"Choosing to refrain from producing another person demonstrates a profound love for all life" [vhemt.org]
1) According to the site, 1190437 people submitted votes or named selections. "Colbert" got 230539 and "Serenity" got about 190k. Even combined, the top two choices only got about 35 percent of the vote. Alone, "Colbert" got about 19% of the vote. Even if the poll results were not biased by ballot stuffing, all they make clear is that no matter what choice NASA made, 80 percent of the voters disagreed with it. In no reasonable sense did "Colbert" win an election -- if a candidate was voted into office with a plurality of only 19% of the vote, there would be calls for his head and the system would probably be reformed.
2)Can we please stop conflating whoever put this survey on with the entirety of NASA? Some small group of people within the organization are responsible for the survey and the name selection. Complain about Bill Gerstenmaier, as it appears that he bears some responsibility for the survey and the naming, or maybe the ISS Project Office.
3)The rules did make it clear that the contest "winner" wouldn't necessarily be picked for the module name. It even gives reasons why: "NASA reserves the right to ultimately select a name in accordance with the best interests of the agency, its needs, and other considerations. Such name may not necessarily be one which is on the list of voted-on candidate names." The ISS is a big international project, and it's possible that the naming of a module might have a diplomatic effect. Relations with the Russians, our major partners on the station, seem somewhat stressed, maybe even on station. So not selecting what may be viewed as the flippant choice for a module name seems the more diplomatically sound choice.
--sabre86
indeed...it is exactly how the Electoral College is intended to work.
"Combined Operational Load Bearing External Resistance Treadmill"
The "Treadmill" is silent.
Colbert Report airs at 2330, not 2230. and I'd like to add my annoyance at Tranquility instead of Serenity. Screw you NASA.
Since NASA is US Government institution and United States is Representative Republic, I'm kind of glad democracy was thrown out. I think NASA handled this quite well and only people insulted are people who forget "The Colbert Report" airs on a channel called "Comedy Central".
There was a danger that the astronauts on it would declare independence, then proceed to drop other nodes on South America. Also, one of the treadmills would be painted red and go far too fast for ordinary astronauts to use.
I keep reading comments here that Mr Colbert's viewers "stuffed" the ballot box. By this I assume "voted more than once" is meant. Is there any evidence of this? I have not seen any so far (tho I haven't searched very hard).
What it looks like to me is that Colbert has a lot of fans, and they all voted to name the node after him. Nothing at all wrong with that, and if there is no evidence of widespread fraud, NASA ought to have accepted the outcome of the vote far more gracefully than they did.
It would have been cooler if it was named the Colbert Operational Load Bearing External Resistance Treadmill, but the real issue is that NASA should have to respect the wishes of the people. The rest of the Government should as well, but that is another story.
Where are the specs and schematics for this thing and why did it cost $6.8 million dollars? Why isn't it running some flavor of Linux or BSD and why is no one commenting on the Diebold machines used for this off year special election? Was this a test run or some sick conditioning scheme for the Government to pre-determine the results? Are the ACLU and the EFF going to do anything about this?
While I'm still disappointed that NASA didn't go with the second most popular vote-getter, Serenity (which would've been huge for Firefly fans), I think naming a treadmill after Colbert gives him a lot of opportunity. Maybe he can leveredge this in some way to help combat America's obesity problem or something. I mean, how many COLBERT's are there in exercise facilities all across the country? This is HUGE! Maybe he can partner with the Biggest Loser now, or something?
Bureaucratic cowards. The insipidity of their naming scheme offends me almost as much as their pandering for attention via pseudo democratic online polls.
If you kill everyone but the robots and the plants first.
Mit der Dummheit kämpfen Götter selbst vergebens
Cause I was just about to watch Colbert
Double :(
If NASA still has sense of humour left, our future as space-fairing species is secure, as far as I am concerned.
I, for one, welcome our new space overlord Stephen Colbert.
He did say that he would become one if the node would not be named after him.
80 CC D8 AF AE D3 AB 54 B7 2E CE 67 C7
The point is that it is always bad to subvert or exploit the voting process when it is made available. And such actions should ALWAYS be protested.
I think that Colbert may very well agree with you. As he turns each exploit into a public spectacle, he raises awareness of these problems and brings them into discussion. Raising awareness of these issues is a very good first step to solving them.
Putting this into another light, what do you think about security researchers who publicly release software exploit information? They have found a weakness in some process, exploited it and then released that information to the public - often receiving acclaim and publicity for their work. Do you protest their acts, as well?
I went to eat some animal crackers and the box said, "Do not eat if seal is broken." I opened the box and sure enough..
treadmill they will be walking all over Colbert?
Hilarious! I'll wager he gets a kick out of it, too.
Running with Linux for over 20 years!
are in the bail out package.
Basically you can bet that more than one Congressman got annoyed and forced the issue here.
Remember, we are only permitted a semblance of Democracy, not an actual one. The person or thing with the most votes wins, unless the loser is more PC or has better lawyers
* Winners compare their achievements to their goals, losers compare theirs to that of others.
Given that 51% of your population generally gets to re-cast "your vote" as if it were theirs (regardless of if it's your entire state in a presidential election or your district for the House), yes, "your vote counts", but the value of that vote ultimately isn't necessarily what you intended. Say you're even vaguely left of center and living in the 6th district of Minnesota, how the hell could you consider that "your vote" counts when Michelle Bachmann is voting on your behalf?
Yeah, "your vote counts" in choosing your rep, but once that rep is chosen, your vote doesn't mean squat. With proportional systems, ten groups each representing 3% of the population suddenly give voice to 30% that are silenced in the US system -- and then those politicians and parties who are used to fighting only for the 2% margin they need to be first-past-the-post start having to actually listen to the other 98%, regardless of which side of center they find themselves.
Apparently they used the "Jeb Bush" vote counting method.
your point is taken but i think NASA would've been better served by going with the popular vote.
--- I was far from home, and the spell of the Eastern sea was upon me. -Lovecraft-
Why even make up an acronym at all? Why can't the government just give something a name and leave it at that?
"The point is that it is always bad to subvert or exploit the voting process when it is made available."
So if junior high students from all over the country had banded together and submitted "Shitstained Underwear Storage Unit" as the name, NASA should have just accepted it?
Hardly. If the suggest name is not in keeping with how they want to present themselves, they SHOULD reject it. Colbert, for all his entertainment value, isn't somebody I'd name anything scientific after.
I think it's great. It shows that NASA can take a joke
If they could take a joke they would have named the module after him instead of copping out like this. If you are going to have a public poll for the name then you have to be prepared to accept the consequences. If you are not then pick the name yourself.
The point of this online naming contest (and online naming contests in general) is not to make a democratic and fair decision, but to raise publicity. The greatest hope is to create controversy, since that drives more publicity. Not naming it after Colbert is the best way to continue the controversy. This way he can continue to be mock-outraged about it for weeks.
Build a man a fire, he's warm for one night. Set him on fire, and he's warm for the rest of his life.
Combined Operations Lower Body Evacuation/Excretion Receiving Tank?
[UID-HeinzIntel]
That's what I say!
It's tacky if people in space have to say, "I'm going to the toilet", into a radio that might be heard by anyone on Earth. Instead, they would be able to say, "I'm going to file a Colbert Report."
Isn't that better?
They didn't name the entire station after Colbert even after he won the competition? Clearly, NASA hates America and wants the bears to win. I will now pray for the salvation of our nation's soul.
Having thought about it a lot, I realized that they simply couldn't name it Colbert. There are thousands of famous people with enough popularity to pull exactly the same stunt; NASA just doesn't have enough things that need naming to go around. And if they give Colbert his node, then the precedent has been set. Would it really be good for NASA to name things the way sports stadiums are named now? Then we would end up with much more embarassing faux pas like having part of the ISS named 'Enron' or 'Madoff'
This is better than the other idea NASA tossed out, naming a toilet.
I guess it really is better to be walked on than dumped on...
But come on! Fricking Tranquility?!?!?
Sheesh, talk about a 60s cliche name...