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TV Show Seeks Terminally Ill Volunteer for Mummification
Terminal illness got you down? Does your future seems bleak? Channel 4 and production company Fulcrum TV would like to brighten your day by making you the star of an upcoming documentary. They would like to offer you the chance to be mummified on TV and maybe even displayed in a museum afterward. An advertisement for the project reads: "We are currently keen to talk to some one who, faced with the knowledge of their own terminal illness and all that it entails, would nonetheless consider undergoing the process of an ancient Egyptian embalming."
Am I going to be done terriyaki style?
Science advances one funeral at a time- Max Planck
Let me be the first to say thats kind of creepy. Are they gonna suck their organs out of them just like the egyptians used to? Cuz thats kind of weird.
Doctors do Massage in Longview WA now, who knew?
Remember, the actual brain is located in the stomach. That thing in your head is just waste and is to be disgarded!
Terminally III?
Is that, like, the sequel to Terminally II?
I am "faced with the knowledge of my own terminal illness" in that I am alive. I know that I will die, sooner or later. I understand that people who are terminally ill have a better idea as to the possible maximum, but we all have a possible maximum, and as you get older it will be looming for you, too. It annoys me when people are like "He KNOWS he's going to die, that must be so depressing". We all "know we are going to die". Nobody lives. Everyone dies. You should live accordingly.
We can never satisfactorily "cure" cancer or any other disease. "Curing" a disease is defined as letting you live long enough to die from a different one. Numbers show that millions of lives have been saved by antibiotics, but have they? Just give them a bit more time. They will die sure enough. The only reason the "terminal illness" part is relevant to this TV show is they need the person to die on their TV schedule.
Why does the person need to be terminally ill? why can't it just be someone who agrees to be mummified following their death?
are the producers that impatient?
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun the frumious Bandersnatch.
Hello,
Commiserations on the news of your imminent demise. At Channel 4, we believe that the most appropriate way of dealing with this sad news, and the undoubted grief of your nearest and dearest, is for you to submit your corpse to be messed about with on national television for public "infotainment". The documentary we are producing will take just as sensitive, informative, and considerate an approach as the famous documentaries "The Boy Whose Skin Falls Off", "The Woman Who Never Grew Up" and our other televised equivalents of old-time circus freak-shows.
We've set up a 24 hour hotline, just in case you really are that close to popping your cloggs, and look forward to working with your mortal remains soon!
best regards,
Channel 4 Public Relations.
Being mummified on live TV isn't all that different from what kids are doing with Facebook these days, anyway.
What is next live executions?
any ways are there laws saying that assisted suicide can't be done in states in us or other areas.
how is that possible, i thought he was an robot from the future...
God's gift to chicks
I volunteer! I expect to return to terrorize the world in a few hundred years though.
Wait, what do you mean life doesn't count as a terminal illness ?
"However beautiful the strategy, you should occasionally look at the results" - Winston Churchill
...George Carlin's all suicide channel on cable TV?
the Fox Network.
Now it's obvious what project Simon Cowell and Paula Abdul have gone to. Insist on earplugs if Simon's on the panel of judges, to help keep you motivated toward reaching the Grand Finale competition.
Maybe they could sweeten the pot and sign me up for any future 'When Monsters Attack' specials.
My, what a tall mummy you are.
It's for science!
No, it's for "science."
So if this is the future...where's my jet pack?
This will be AFTER and not before death , right ???
"I don't pitch OpenSUSE Linux to my friends, i let Microsoft do it for me
This is about as low as you can go for ratings. This would be as low as showing people getting anal warts removed. Thank god TV is dying.
So it's not just me that sees shows like Mythbusters as an intellectual version of Jackass.
Science advances one funeral at a time- Max Planck
Anyone else read it as entrails?
GameRanger - multiplayer gaming service for PC and Mac games
I much prefer the late, great prophet Bill Hicks' suggestion of recruiting the terminally as stunt fodder in action movies.
I am "faced with the knowledge of my own terminal illness"
I take it you've been diagnosed with the dreaded Alive, Well and Happy Syndrome, caused by a complex combination of healthy diet, regular exercise, a low to moderate alcohol consumption, a lack of tobacco or nicotine intake, frequent sexual intercourse and a supportive social network.
Fortunately, it's in decline among US youth; see the article published in pubdot at http://science.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=10/01/12/1337235
Ehhh... there's a certain amount of stuff that needs to be done to interest people in science. We have a culture where being smart is a bad thing. Little ways we can fight that is good... the MythBusters started out ok, until they started warning about the science content. Warning? WTF? There should be a "Now pay attention to this next bit!" tag, not a fucking warning.
My blog. Good stuff (when I remember to update it). Read it.
Are those guys back in business again?
Don't believe them folks, they say you will be preserved for all time and eventually resurrected so you sign up and pay them a fortune, then you get fucking ripped off by those stonemason bastards who are all part of some secret price-gouging club. You get the procedure, get settled in for 'eternity', then some asshat comes along after a couple of millennia, digs you up and uses you to power his steam train!
That's not right. I, for one won't get burned like that again.
They whose government reduces their essential liberties for temporary security, receive neither liberty nor security.
Tut tut tut...
[UID-HeinzIntel]
...the family can say, "That's my MUMMY!"
YankDownUnder Veni, Vidi, volo in domum redire
When you're making a TV show that needs a mummy army, just let me know
Please help publicise swpat.org - the software patents wiki
Sure do, I have the ingame audio ripped to my iPod. # Eugenics Inc. International (2) # Mummification (2)
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When is the last time the theories on preparing Egyptian bodies for mummification were tested? We've seen documentation of the procedure on pyramid walls and we've seen the mummies themselves, but how do we know that the proposed mix and administration of chemicals are correct?
Performing the procedure will tell us more about it. So what if it's also a gimmick for raising ad revenue?
Your brain is not a computer.
First they hook us on shows like Survivor and Fear Factor. If those programs were not unsettling enough, now we want to watch someone die on tv, and watch them go though the process of mummification. Somehow I get the feeling THE RUNNING MAN is right around the corner...
my mom posts on slashdot.
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Please, for the love of God, reality TV must be stopped. It has already degraded our culture and ruined our ability to appreciate anything urbane or tasteful. Garbage like this is just the final insult. Please, just stop.
Zooperman
volunteers who are willing to undergo the process of zombification so I can have an army of the undead to do my bidding. I'll bet that my reality show is going to be way cooler than Channel 4's pathetic "mummy" reality show.
cheap labor conservatives - they want to keep you hungry enough to be thankful for minimum wage.
Actually these costs are really cheap for wealthy people, you would think that a lot more of these rich people who die of old age (lots of them around and many more rich baby boomers are in the pipeline.
That was the most frustrating thing I've tried to parse all year. Tell me son, have they already liquefied your brains?
Your brain is not a computer.
1994. Hmm, this might be a better description.
No?
No deal, then.
I remember watching this done on a modern human over 10 years years ago on discovery networks... it was very cool.
from his wiki article:
"In 1994, Brier and a colleague, Ronald Wade, director of the State Anatomy Board of Maryland, claimed to be the first people in 2,000 years to mummify a human cadaver using ancient Egyptian techniques. This research earned Brier the affectionate nickname "Mr. Mummy" and was also the subject of the National Geographic television special of the same name."
It occurs to me that I have seen some 5 different Discovery Channel programs on how mummification was carried out and something I could note is that they were slightly different on "HOW" it was done...
I could bet that whoever is going to do this.. will make it bad.. hahaha
For example, the "taking the brain out through the nose" part seems very tricky demanding extensive expertise..
I don't think a 21st century mummy with her face/nose all messed up is going to find its way to any museum..
This has been done before: thats how Tutankhamun got famous
to television network greed ....
I cant belive they are asking someone to die on their schedule ... and broadcast anything related to his/her death ... is this even legal???
God ... this world is stupid.....
A friend died of a stroke a couple years ago and donated herself to a med school. Said she always dreamed of being a skeleton in the corner at a med school.
I've experiments to be run.
There is research to be done.
On the people who are
still alive.
I'm doing Science and I'm still alive.
The tag-line says "science tv idle terminally morbid story"
sudo ergo sum
I'm not dead!
You can't win Darth. If you mod me down, I shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine
Staring the most famous politicians of the world!
Then do a follow up season with dictator leaders, soap opera celebrities, ..
I remember a not so recent Dr. Who episode that revolved around "deadly" gameshows (that weren't so deadly... but I don't wanna spoil for those that didn't see it yet).
We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
iMummy?
I am very sucseptible to "let's have another drink"
This wouldn't be a problem for Russian TV. They can guarantee filming starts on time.
MMO Quests are like orgasms:
You may solo them, I prefer them in a group.
What the hell do you care? It's not like you're going to be lying there thinking, "Aw man, this really sucks!"
My family has approached me a few times about what I want to be done with my body when I die. My answer is always the same. I want what organs might be useful donated. After that, I really don't care. Bury me, cremate me, donate me to science, do whatever gives you what comfort and solace you need, because that's not me.
When my mom passed away, which is by far the single most gut-wrenching experience I've ever been through in my life, that thought was the only thing that got me through the funeral without totally falling apart. My mom was a lot more than just the collection of organic molecules that lay before me, and she's gone. I appreciate the body that lay before me; it was her "house" for 60 years and allowed me to see her, talk to her, interact with her, and love her. But the house was now empty. Sad, for sure, but it wasn't the loss of the house I was mourning.
So yeah, once I'm gone, you can pull my brains out through my nose and make gut soup for all I care. It was just my house, and I don't live there any more.
...will I get to go to Pandora when I pass on?
Got them moderator blues I blieve I walk out the do', With these mod-points I been gettin', I 'most never post no mo'
Does that mean my wife and maid will buried with me, dead or alive? Well sign me up!
Ah, another Pibgorn fan! Tom Torquemada!!!
My sci-fi novel, Ghost Thief, is now available from Amazon.com.
I heard that FreeBSD was volunteering for the show!
-- Home is where you eat your heart out.
*SPOILER ALERT* It turns out that Rose isn't dead. The Dalek Emporer just kidnapped her to make her his concubine. Where do you think the "nightmare child" that they mentioned in the End of Time came from? (They call it the "nightmare child" because it's as ugly as a Dalek and as annoying as Rose).
Today's Sesame Street was brought to you by the number e.
I heard that the "octo-mom" wants to do a reality show. How about we sign her up, call it "octo-mum"? Once she's mummified, we wouldn't have to listen to her anymore! Plus, she's already given us a head start with all that plastic surgery to make herself look like Angelina Jolie!
Did anyone else read that headline as "Terminally 3" ?
I know some adults who act like they are terminally 3 and mummifying them would be a good thing. So it kind of made sense that way.
Ceci n'est pas une signature.
They weren't strange to the Aztecs!
Subject said enough ..
--- I am known for the ones who want to find me on the net. Is that a privacy risk or a privilege? One might wonder..
Well there you go. But aren't repeated experiments an important part of the scientific method? ;)
Your brain is not a computer.
O.K., so setting aside the ethical concerns, the absolute morbidity of this idea, and the "is this really appropriate for a general television audience" concerns; I'd rather have plastination instead of mummification.
- James