Criminal Photoshops Himself Into Charity Photos In Bid For Leniency
38-year-old Daryl Simon decided it would be a good idea to submit fake pictures of himself at charity events, and forged letters of support from various charitable organizations to the court before he was sentenced for credit card fraud. Unfortunately for Daryl, he is as good at Photoshop as he is at credit card scams, and Judge Stephen Robinson was not amused. Simon was sentenced to 285-months in prison — 50 months more than the maximum under sentencing guidelines. From the article: "Daryl Simon's bald-faced move included sticking a picture of himself into a shot with a physical-therapy patient, then flipping the image and placing it next to a teen student. 'Evidence that his image was inserted and flipped can be seen by examining the single detail on his shirt above his fingers — that detail appears on the left side of the shirt in the top photograph, and on the right side of the shirt in the bottom photograph,' prosecutors wrote."
I guess he liked to shave.
He should have paid a graphic designer to do it for him. I'm sure he could have found one that accepts credit card payment.
"There are four boxes to be used in defense of liberty: soap, ballot, jury, and ammo. Please use in that order." -Ed H
Now I know how those politicians do it!
...Simon presented of him standing next to Admiral Ackbar. The judge determined the photo was a fake, as the Admiral was overseas fighting the clone wars at the time Simon claimed the photo was taken.
"How to Piss off your Judge, for Dummies". Unfortunately, it was meant as a parody book.
For every problem, there is at least one solution that is simple, neat, and wrong.
Too bad there aren't any photos in TFA, I wanted to have a good laugh too...
If 235 months was the maximum sentence, then wasn't the judge breaking the law by sentencing him to 285? Obviously, either 235 wasn't *really* the maximum or the judge is looking for a good way to get removed from the bench. I suspect the former.
SJW: Someone who has run out of real oppression, and has to fake it.
EOM
The prosecuting attorney(s) for their keen eye and to Judge Stephen Robinson for his lack of "amusement". I just hope the extra time does not lend any assistance to this idiot for getting and appeal.
The judge could tell by looking at the pixels.
I don't get it. There are rarely any photos that accompany news on the internet. What is up with that? If anything, it's only one lame ass photo... but... why not 50 lame photos? If news was done right on the internet, every story would have 5 pro germane and current photos, and pages of amateur cell phone photos and video. If a news site existed that did this, that didn't sell news but reported it... ah, what am I .... pipe dreams
The Admin and the Engineer
Interesting story, but without a picture, there isn't much to say.
While the defendant got 50 months more than maximum sentencing for what he was accused of ... he could have also gotten a lot MORE than 50 extra months if brought up on perjury charges. It would be a good idea for him to just take it and not complain :)
It is more productive to voice thoughtful opinions (reply) than to judge (moderate) others.
this is why you have to have a zero tolerance policy for cheating in college and high school
because if you let people cut and paste their term papers and google answers during multiple choice tests, you breed idiots like this fraudster
you create a whole class of people who believe the way to a better life is to fake everything
of course it always goes on: fake resumes, lies during first dates, etc. but when the stink rises to this kind of problem solving philosophy: "the challenge is not how to answer this question but how to fake a good answer" then you have created monsters, who, even if they are successful at their tricks, wind up not even knowing who the hell they are themselves
eventually, you become fake to even yourself. a truly and horribly empty shell of a person
intellectual property law is philosophically incoherent. it is your moral duty to ignore it or sabotage it
A barefaced (or bald-faced) lie is one that is obviously a lie to those hearing it. The phrase comes from 17th-century British usage referring to those without facial hair as being seen as particularly forthright and outwardly honest, and therefore more likely to get away with telling a significant lie. A variation that has been in use almost as long is bold-faced lie, referring to a lie told with a straight and confident face (hence "bold-faced"), usually with the corresponding tone of voice and emphatic body language of one confidently speaking the truth.
cited from wikipedia "lie" . There are several more site that discuss this if you do a simple Google of bald-faced.
"There are four boxes to be used in defense of liberty: soap, ballot, jury, and ammo. Please use in that order." -Ed H
At least the attempt is more creative than the common American custom of "Finding Jesus" shortly before one goes to meet the parole board...
Why exactly are all of the photos you submitted for review PSD files? Oh and you forgot to merge the layers...
...And did I mention the shadowing is all wrong here?
1. I expected to see the images in question when clicking the link in the FA.
2. 24 years is a little excessive for fraud. Make the guy repay his debts and some. I guess people think that as long as we aren't executing people we are being humane in the care of criminals. Have you ever thought about what it would be like to be stuck in jail for that period of time?
Need a -1 Clueless mod.
Seriously, did you consider checking the etymology of the phrase before posting here? Maybe you would have learned something (as opposed to simply being taught by the other poster) instead of appearing as an ignorant wanker.
What idiots write these comments? It amazes me how many slashdotters and people in general will use phrases that they clearly have no understanding of when they speak or write. Its clear they have no understanding because they don't even say it right.
Please kids, for the love of god, know what the words you are saying mean before you use them.
(My apologies to the original poster, I couldn't resist, and it felt fitting.)
I can tell from some of the pixels, and from having seen quite a few shops in my time.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Some years ago, I acted as an expert witness in a civil case that involved forged pages inserted into the only extant signed copy of a contract. I testified on the stand at length as to all the various evidences that these specific pages had been deliberately changed and had likely been retyped and then printed: they were printed on an ink-jet printer vs. a laser printer for the original pages; there were words misspelled that had been correctly spelled in the most recent electronic version of the document; there were three lines of text completely missing on one of the altered pages, likely due to similar line endings (i.e., the typist looked at the hard copy, typed the text in, then looked back and inadvertently skipped down three lines); and so on.
After I had testified, I was excused from the courtroom along with the alleged forger so that the lawyers could argue some motions before the judge. Out in the hallway, the alleged forger turned to me and said, "Your testimony was very interesting; I learned a lot." I thought, "Oh, great. Now he'll know what to avoid in the future." :-) ..bruce..
Bruce F. Webster (brucefwebster.com)
Complete MISUSE of the term, bald-faced.
lol
Is 1563649 a prime number?
Another suspicious photo has his head stuck on a bikini clad Sarah Palin's body.
Who would win this election: Andrew Weiner vs Andrew Weiner's weiner.
Be glad you don't work for my boss. I cringe every time she says, "For all intentional purposes..."
Truth, Justice. Or the American Way.
I think he saw the Seinfeld episode where George had a cartoon drawing inserted into his boss' photo.
It is by the juice of the coffee bean that thoughts acquire speed, the teeth acquire stains. The stains become a warning
That's not as bad as 'for all intensive purposes' which doesn't even make sense.
I have developed a truly marvelous proof of this comment, which this signature is too narrow to contain.
BP likes to use crappy, self-serving 'shops, too. Like their "crisis command center."
Is there a link to the shopped photos submitted anywhere? I think like most people here I want to see his handy work. Maybe its just me.
Two years ago, he was found in Queens.
In federal prison, 'queens' found in you!
It sure does, dontchya know - if your are ShakesPalin.
When information is power, privacy is freedom.
OT, but some of my favorites (collected from various co-workers):
I'd like to emphasize that I am NOT making any of these up.
"He was reeking haddock with the system."
"It's not that cold on the thermometer, but don't forget the wind shield factor".
"OK, all of these things are important, but what takes present tense?"
"Hopefully this has got your creative juices floating..."
"There's no pot of gold at the end of the tunnel."
"He was out last week for surgery. He had a pollack removed."
"This post contains words, known to the State of California to cause thought. Wash brain thoroughly after reading."
Yes, and from what you posted from Wikipedia, which one of those actually fits, hmmm?
Persistent Volume manager for Kubernetes - https://github.com/dwimsey/openshift-pvmanager
In all fairness, there isn't a pot of gold at the end of the tunnel, because it's at the end of the rainbow.
I've heard:
"This takes us to the crotch of the matter" (which, I suppose, might make sense in contexts other than the one in which it was delivered).
"Nothing more to talk about -- it's a mute's point"
"He was essentially in involuntary certitude"
"More changes are coming down the pile"
"We'll come to that bridge when we get to it"
"You need to think outside the blocks"
"There's no 'me' in 'Team'"
Eloi, Eloi, lema sabachtani?
www.fogbound.net
Pics or it didn't happen ... oh wait
I can tell by the pixels and from seeing quite a few shops in my time!
PPN
You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.
Apparently they exhausted all the purposes.
That brings me to an interesting point, / . is just "the ramblings of socially-inept, technology-literate news-mongers".
24 years? Can someone explain to me how this works? People get away with less prison time for murder. Not to mention corporate fraudsters who never seem to be punished for anything.
23 years for scamming.
That's 23 years just for taking money that isn't his.
I knew you Americans liked your long and excessive sentences, but this takes the biscuit. I've heard of murderers and rapists getting less time.
Just shows you what your court system is really there to protect - the good old green.
Moo point :-)
When they came for the communists, I said "He's next door. Take him away. Goddam commies."
Perhaps if the submitter had included a link to the photos we could judge for ourselves?
Confucius say, "Find worm in apple - bad. Find half a worm - worse."
23.75 years for credit card fraud!!! - you'd get about half that for murder in NZ
links?