Slashdot Mirror
Facebook Linked To One In Five Divorces In US
An anonymous reader writes "yes, in theory if you're single, Facebook can help you meet that special someone. But for those in even the healthiest of marriages, improper use can quickly devolve into a marital disaster. A recent survey by the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers found that Facebook is cited in one in five divorces in the United States. Also, more than 80 percent of divorce lawyers reported a rising number of people are using social media to engage in extramarital affairs."
Saying that divorces are linked to Facebook is like saying car purchases are linked to internet usage.
This is a common way for people to communicate. Facebook is going to be "linked to" everything as long as this is a fact.
In other news:
Facebook is linked to 50% of parties. Facebook is linked to 80% of weddings. Facebook is linked to 100% of political. Facebook is linked to 65% of friendships. Facebook is linked to 90% of people liking stuff.
I'd be willing to bet that the use of the telephone (one of the greatest social inventions of all time) is linked to just about 100% of all divorces, as well.
What is it with everyone trying to blame Facebook and Craigslist for all the ills of the world? They are tools, and nothing more. But they are new, and so I guess that makes them suspicious, doesn't it?
I'm fairly sure there were stories like this going around when email became popular, and people started using it to, y'know, communicate with each other.
Before that, cellphones--telephones--hell, I bet even the telegraph was implicated in adultery.
(WHAT.ARE.YOU.WEARING.STOP
SIX.SKIRTS.HOOPS.CRINOLINE.BUSTLE.CHEMISE.HAT.STOP
NO.GLOVES.YOU.NAUGHTY.WENCH.STOP)
And back before that, it was letters.
Anything people have ever used to communicate has been implicated in adultery, because that's sort of how to set up a liason, ain't it?
In Xanadu did Kubla Khan
A stately pleasure dome decree
[thumbs up icon]
If you're in one of the "healthiest of marriages", you're not going to be doing anything on facebook or elsewhere that's going to jeopardize your marriage. I'm not going to be an asshole in person, or online. If you think that something is OK online, but not in real life, then you've got problems.
Facebook Linked To One In Five Divorces In US
And how many are linked to cars (*), another tool used by those who have decided to be unfaithful?
:-)
Yet another time for http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Correlation_does_not_imply_causation.
(*) Hey, dumb stories demand a car analogy.
It's like saying air is implicated because people forced it through their larynx while cheating.
is that there are no divorce lawyers in Arkansas. according to the AAML website. Is divorce not legal there?
I thought it was the homosexuals that were a threat to my marriage? You can't possibly get me to accept that now its the Internet and the Facebook that are the real barrier to matrimonial bliss.
Lets be honest, the usual cause of most divorces is the two people in the marriage.
Shouldn't people at some point stop blaming outside influences for their own failings ?
I'm happily married. I'm a hardcore gamer, who spend a lot of time online. My wife hates computer games. We make it work fine.
My daughter owns a notebook, spends a lot of time online. I don't have any kind of "network nanny" on her computer. So far, she hasn't committed mass murder in her school.
Go be a husband/wife and a parent. Stop blaming outside influences, computers, games, TV etc for your own failings. Own up to it.
Facebook don't force people to commit adultery. Videogames don't brainwash kids to murder other people. Deal with it.
morcego
Do you wish to install?
[Yes] [No]
.
Prisencolinensinainciusol. Ol Rait!
We hate social services that require having friends. We love arguing about correlation and causation. Slashdot serves ads.
"I like to lick butts!" by MobileTatsu-NJG (#32700246) (Score:5, Informative)
Facebook causes divorces. That's not good.
Luckily we use slashdot, so we're safe!
I wonder how many divorces were actually due to Farmville or some other app?
Warning: Virus Detected
My daughter owns a notebook, spends a lot of time online. I don't have any kind of "network nanny" on her computer. So far, she hasn't committed mass murder in her school.
No, but she has been instrumental in toppling several African governments this month. The consequences will never be the same.
the preceding comment is my own and in no way reflects the opinion of the Joint Chiefs of Staff
So the art of living a happy marriage is a "martial art"?
I'm too smart to ever have a Facebook account, and my wife is too stupid to set up a Facebook account without assistance...
I've abandoned my search for truth; now I'm just looking for some useful delusions.
slashdotters are prob the only sensible folx that immediately see through this suggestive phrasing bs.
At first I thought it was basically saying that 20% of all facebook users get a divorce and facebook was the culprit. Now I realize its saying that out of all the divorces, 20% of them claim its due to a connection they made with someone on facebook. I would like to know what percentage these 20% contribute to the entire demographic of married couples on facebook (if both spouses on facebook count as 1). That would give a better perspective on how much an impact facebook has IMO. Whatever the results, I would consider the same impact substantially higher for non-married committed relationships where separation consists of no legal paperwork or drawn out procedures. I'm so old and jaded these days I know the grass is never greener on the other side. Everyone has a list of flaws, marriage is all about finding the person with the flaws you are willing to live with. Leaving a known quantity for an unknown quantity is not really the smartest choice. After 11 yrs of marriage I know that if I leave a mess somewhere I wont get judged over it. Likewise if my wife does something that gets on my nerves I'm over it in 10 minutes anyway. None of that exists in a new relationship. Sure its shiny and new, but eventually that wears off and suddenly you realize there's flaws you might NOT be willing to live with. Acceptance is the most important ingredient for making a relationship survive the long haul. Going with shiny and new, you never know if the other person wont bolt as soon as they find out you fart in bed, or like to work late on projects. Just because you two get along great as pen pals is hardly a basis to completely up-heave ones life.
Is this the Peer Reviewed research that our academic publishers are claiming deserves high fees for? What happened to outrage at bad methodology?
P.S. Bill and Ted like this.
My first Journal Entry ever, in 8 years! http://slashdot.org/journal/365947/aphelion-scifi-fantasy-horror-poetry-webzine
In other news, lawyers are linked to 100% of divorces.
In a controversial finding, "Cow Clicker" was directly implicated in 87% of the divorces in the more rural states, and "why can't mah lazy bum hubby git out dere make a billion like that jew kid?" was cited in over 62% of divorces involving blood relatives.
So what they're saying is that, when it comes to divorce, facebook has now made it up to the point where it's 20% as bad for marriage as lawyers?
Pound! Bang! Bin! Bash! is this a shell script or a Batman comic?
My wife started using facebook because her coworkers were using it. She was working with them in close quarters all day and then she would come home and talk to them on facebook most of the evening. Its been a year since it ended and I don't yet know if this is going to end in divorce. What I can tell you is that we as people were never evolved to have someone whispering in our ear all day. What makes Facebook in particular and social networking in general dangerous is that you used to have to be close to someone to become attached. Now you only have to be texting them or chatting with them or whatever. It does what the phone never could do: It connects you to anyone you ever met that you can find online.
I'm not saying that this is neccessarily a bad thing. I am saying that we aren't wired for and we aren't prepared for this kind of connectivity.
Beware the wood elf!!!
Sure, but both telephones and car interiors are difficult to clean after you've used them for extramarital purposes...
I've abandoned my search for truth; now I'm just looking for some useful delusions.
So, um.... whose basement are you living in now?
I've abandoned my search for truth; now I'm just looking for some useful delusions.
Wow! Facebook must cause divorces! Or, Facebook is now simply a "space" in which social activity takes place for a great many people, and that evidence of illicit affairs and other information unpalatable to a spouse can be found there just as it was previously found in desks, coat pockets, cameras, and inboxes.
But before he won the internets, you could sorta keep all that stuff under wraps. Facebook is like a "friendly wikileaks".
Who gets the peace prize?
My first Journal Entry ever, in 8 years! http://slashdot.org/journal/365947/aphelion-scifi-fantasy-horror-poetry-webzine
If someone smashed my computer, I sure as hell would dump her. No need for computer wrecking psycho bitches. Hell, I would have to consider the value of my relationship if she "accidentally" infected my computer with a virus more than once.
More proof that facebook is a holy roman conspiracy. Quick everybody switch over to handfasting and ICQ before they crush us into a dark age of bondage orgies and skype.
"Stratigraphically the origin of agriculture and thermonuclear destruction will appear essentially simultaneous" -- Lee
Well for some stupid reason my GF once read my emails. :D
And found a naked picture of woman I happen to know.
That was a great outrage
We did not divorce, though.
I don't really get why "researchers" waste their time with such bullshit research. As if the couples had not divorced if there was no facebook, lol.
Hm, perhaps to buy advertizing space for layers specialized into divorces?
angel'o'sphere
Cost free eBook I read (by iBook/Kobo/Amazon/ObookO/Gutenberg etc.): "The Green Odyssey" by Philip Jose Farmer.
aren`t the best candidates for grownup relationships like marriage.
Your stricture is a harsh and oppressive environment. *heavy breathing* your wife is going to think twice about it at the first opportunity *heavy breathing* she's gonna meet somebody who has what you don't: newness and fun *heavy breathing* because of your repression and the law of forbidden fruit, even thinking about letting him fuck her in the break room is gonna feel better than the same ol you've pigeonholed her into *breathing heavy* and when she finally lets loose and lets him cream her vulnerable pussy, its gonna feel better for her than anything she can remember, all because of you. ... You, and every other schmuck truing to live in a fantasy land of perfect security and shoring it up with bullshit like marriage. Listen to biology: every married man is a wanmabe cuckold.
"Stratigraphically the origin of agriculture and thermonuclear destruction will appear essentially simultaneous" -- Lee
It's time to quit blaming the technology... if you cheat on your spouse... the one to blame is the dummy in the mirror, not the blog you crapped on them with.
E
My Grandma got married a few months back (yes, you read that right). I was talking to one of the ministers at the service, and he was commenting on how he does fewer weddings these days than he used to. I asked him if he thought it might be because people are having more odd-ball weddings, rather than typical church related services. He said he had worried about that at first, but after doing some digging, it just seemed like fewer people were actually interested in marriage. This trend seemed particularly true in younger adults like myself.
That kind of discussion, plus this kind of news, plus my own personal experiences talking to folks makes me wonder if the institution is simply being questioned on a more fundamental level. It always seemed a bit odd to me (though not completely unreasonable) to commit oneself to the company of another single person for the entirety of one's remaining life. I think a lot of younger folks are starting to question that paradigm as well. As such, I think this particular 'study' might just be revealing a symptom of a deeper topic. I think the traditional institution of marriage is on the verge of slipping from being the formal definition. I don't think as many people in the free (kinda) world today are as interested or intrigued by the idea of spending the rest of their lives with one person. One of the great things the internet has done is that it has opened many people to new perspectives and new ideas. There is a lot to learn out there, and there are millions of beautiful people to meet and get to know on whatever level one may desire. I think, in light of these revelations, folks are starting to see that binding oneself to a single mate for the rest of their lives seems a bit, well, boring. If you marry someone when you are, say 22, and after ten years or so, you two have had a good run, and some good times, but things have stagnated, why not let good memories remain good memories, quit while you're ahead, and go meet someone new (if that's what you both want)?
Of course, these are just the musings of my own mind, but it's something to think about. I'd wager that over the next few decades, we are going to see the traditional institution of marriage start to fall from its place as the accepted standard.
Motorcycles, Robots, Space Gossip and More!
Because the alternative is to admit that the real moral culpability is with the user of said tool and our society can't stand the idea of actually being "judgmental" toward someone who actually cheats on their spouse. Even that is asking too much since many Americans now stridently denounce you for being "judgmental" for even saying that you have to be a pile of dog $H%& as a human being to cheat on your spouse or break up your family just because you find your spouse "boring" (not abusive, just not interesting).
The mainstream media simultaneously celebrates the divorce culture as "women's empowerment" and then wonders why many men are turning to pickup artists and douchebaggery instead of emulating Ward Cleaver...
Maybe it has something to do with people having a stronger self-esteem? http://www.cnn.com/2011/TECH/social.media/03/01/facebook.self.esteem/index.html
-- http://www.doczayus.com/
Um... wait, don't tell me. I think I saw this in Kindergarten Cop: "Boys have a penis. Girls have a va-CHINA." Yours just happens to be taped to your taint.
Do I win?
It's no longer necessary to hit the bar every night for a month to maybe find someone you're compatible enough to sleep with. This will ruin some marriages because sex can be just a click away, and all it takes is someone feeling scorned or lonely because their significant other went to bed early one night to sew the seeds of infidelity. People are petty, petty creatures. The smallest slight can lead to a major affair down the road.
Job? I don't have time to get a job! Who will sit around and bitch about being broke and unemployed then?
Most of us cannot even get a woman like me after 35 years. I don't have to worry about this. Oh wait, some of us don't even have Facebook accounts. Even better. :P
Ant(Dude) @ Quality Foraged Links (AQFL.net) & The Ant Farm (antfarm.ma.cx / antfarm.home.dhs.org).
"Meanwhile, the poor Babel fish, by effectively removing all barriers to communication between different races and cultures, has caused more and bloodier wars than anything else in the history of creation."
The original Howling Frog is a fictional character and has no UID.
There was a story a few months ago about a preacher warning his congregation about Facebook infidelity. While the his comments were of course hyperbolic, there's some truth at the core. It's not blaming Facebook, but it facilitates people looking up old relationships which could lead to problems.
I swear to God...I swear to God! That is NOT how you treat your human!
Wittiest observation I've seen in a while.
The word was that match.com contributed to 10% of US marriages some years ago. An online source didn't confirm this at the moment but says a 3-year study granted them a score of 17% couples married.
For the half-full means half-empty crowd, divorce is still winning offline and online.
Of those involving Facebook, 100% involved Farmville.
You do realize the fellas have to cheat with someone, don't you? And I don't think the closet cases are anywhere near the majority.
I suppose you could claim it's married men and unmarried women, but there are certainly lots of unmarried men who are more than willing to sleep with married women.
Ooh, a sarcasm detector. Oh, that's a real useful invention.
The lawyers help you suck all that money from them, then they suck all that money from you. You are better off without them.
Cheers, Chris
"its complicated"
...Respond with Trojan?
As a really off topic side note, let me point out that out of all the people I know, lawyers and stock brokers are by far the most likely to purchase lotto tickets or gamble on sports or races.
Lawyers love statistics. In fact, in a market over-saturated with opportunistic lawyers who profit from others misfortune (personal injury, divorce, etc...) the competition is rough. Divorce lawyers are facing a terrible time. More and more people are finding out that there's no point to marriage anymore. There just really isn't any point at all to marriage when you can simply write a good will instead. Marriage has two purposes. It is a religious thing which I'll ignore for this topic. It is also a means to secure the welfare of the member of the relationship who lacks the ability to support themselves financially.
In modern times when women are self sufficient, work full-time jobs, have university educations, run companies, etc... they are no longer the "weaker sex". If a relationship comes to an end, they will no starve or freeze in the cold. Instead, they'll go to work the next day and do what they did the day before and simply reestablish themselves. Life goes on. In short, the need for marriage no longer exists for them.
All marriage really accomplishes anymore is to lock two people in a relationship by making it a greater inconvenience to separate than if they weren't married. But marriage does actually have a huge draw back. Credit. In modern times, if a single member of a married relationship performs badly with credit, then both members suffer. By avoiding marriage to begin with, mistakes made by one member of the relationship will allow the couple to use the other participants credit while they repair the first persons.
Story finished, the point being, while there are more divorce attorneys popping up all the time, the number of prospective divorces are dropping since divorce requires marriage.
Lawyers advertise fiercely in the U.S., it's hard to watch anything from a children's cartoon to a discovery channel documentary without being bombarded with advertisements regarding personal injury and divorce attorneys. They have to strum up business.
Back in the 80s, there was a guy who made his fortune by reading the NY city statistics reports used for traffic planning and emergency services as to where the most car accidents were occurring within the city. This guy would then rent an open corner or near corner shop at the intersection with the highest accident rate. He'd then put some crappy tables and stools in it and sell some of the cheapest coffee he could buy for $10 a cup with a sign on the wall "No coffee, no loitering". Lawyers would line up around the block each morning at 5am to be the first one in at 6:30am when he opened to get the stool closest to the door while still having a window view. When an accident happened, they'd rush for the door, head straight for the victim and try handing out their card. If the victim said "I have a lawyer", they'd rush to the other guy and say "That guy says he has a lawyer, sign here".
Statistics are part of the legal game. These lawyers would starve if they didn't have them. Because of reports like this one, even poorly executed, they know that placing advertisements on Facebook for their services with tasteless jokes like "If you're a married person here on Facebook, there's a 20% chance you'll need my services". It doesn't matter that the badly researched statistic is badly interpreted. What is important is that the lawyer knows where they should be advertising. In fact, a lawyers ability to twist the meaning of research that was conducted from an inappropriate perspective is often what allows them to feed themselves to begin with.
If I were Facebook, Twitter or otherwise, I would spend a fortune on publishing statistics like this. It would REALLY drum up their advertising revenue. Would be even better if they can offer targeted marketing. For example, if you're willing to pay extra, then instead of spamming 600 million u
Strange, but encouraging to see this sort of wisdom on slashdot. This is the original reason for marriage, (vastly) predating preferential tax treatment etc. Children are an essential part of every civilization, which is why if there is an exception to every culture having a marriage ceremony, it would be the exception that proves the rule.
And if people are going to bring about the end of a marriage which has borne children, through action or inaction, then let it be said that they are selfish dicks for doing so.
If I have seen further it is by stealing the Intellectual Property of giants.
Every house in which a family broke up through divorce, had a sink.
I do not want your cheap brainburning drugs. They are useless for work. And I am a working man today.
Facebook is now one of the factors of divorce? Wait, what are the other 4? Adultery might be the first. This is silly, maybe any day from now, the Vatican will have a say about this, and they're going to be on rampage. That's for sure...