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Elementary School Bans Students From Touching Each Other
theshowmecanuck writes "A school in British Columbia (the province that now even California can call flakey) has just banned elementary school students from touching each other during recess. You know, one of those times for play and more importantly learning how to socialize (which itself includes touching). CTV News reports: 'A ban on touching during recess at a B.C. elementary school has shocked parents, who call the new no-touch policy "ridiculous." For most kids, recess is a chance to run around and goof-off with their friends, but a new ban on touching at a school in Aldergrove could put a damper on playtime. School administrators at Coghlan Fundamental Elementary School in B.C. have banned kindergarten students from touching each other during recess.'"
who?
How do you know who's "it"?
average IQ in Canada just hit one !
You all the type of people the Administrators are.
They are the ones who were never picked in PE.
They are the ones who never had a date to the dance.
They are the ones who excelled in class and failed in life.
But they found their niche in life where they could be successful...
Fucking up our kids for life.
When Fascism comes to America, it will call itself Anti-Fascism, and tell you to give up your guns.
Many games in recess involve at least some form of physical contact. How are kids going to play tag?
Now instead of Raffee they'll be listening to jingles and learning how to use the 3 Sea Shells.
Demolition Man's setting was too far south obviously.
have banned kindergarten students from touching each other during recess.
But touching themselves is still allowed. Huzzah!
We will bankrupt ourselves in the vain search for absolute security. -- Dwight D. Eisenhower
Contest to see who can be the most ridiculous. "Tag! You're it."
For all intensive purposes, "whom" is no longer a word. That begs the question, "who cares"?
Are they trying to create an entire class of socially maladjusted kids? Because that sounds like exactly what they're doing. It's not like you can easily learn the subtleties of touch later on in life. Even a year gap can get you labeled a creep and carry nasty, debilitating consequences for decades.
Finding God in a Dog
Parents are upset about it.
It's an overreactionary policy by the school, nothing more.
If my kid were in that school, I'd tell them to ignore the rule, and tell the teacher or principal that reprimands them that their dad told them to ignore it because they thought it was stupid.
File under 'M' for 'Manic ranting'
This is the only way to slow the spread of Cooties. Tell your kids the risks. Get tested.
"What are you doing?"
"Not touching you."
"Stop it!"
"Still not touching you..."
"Teacher!!!! Tell Bobby to stop not touching me!!!"
News for nerds. Stuff that matters.
Pat-a-Cake Pat-a-Cake, Baker's Man... "You're suspended!"
I would like to say this is one of the stupidest ideas I have ever heard.
Sadly it isn't even in the top 10. So i will just say that whoever came up with this idea is a moron.
If I were God, wouldn't I protect my churches from acts of me?
I'm trying to be a good Dad and teach my kid to bully his classmates but it's getting harder and harder...
O Canada!
Children could still sneak out of sight and have body contact. They could 'trip' and fall into each other (faking it, the little bastards-my nephew loves faking falls). This is a start, but clearly falls short of its goals.
What's needed here is a way to keep them contained and safe, both for their own good and the good of the other children. Perhaps a start could be a resistance device fitted on the ankles to limit their speed (after all, high speed injuries are more dangerous). Maybe similar ones for the arms to prevent flailing arms injuring other people, or accidentally throwing objects at each other. I was originally going to propose having it by the forearms, but that still leaves elbows as threats - so instead have an entire jacket purposed for this effect. It could double as a uniform for ease of identification of students, maybe in a bright recognisable colour in case they wander off.
Once the children are properly protected, you then need to move onto securing the environment. Additional padding for those inescapable falls, having all objects edges rounded and no sharp objects around, would be a good use of taxpayer money for classroom renovation. Only then can we ensure they are properly cared for and educated, to grow up into strong, well-adjusted, outstanding members of the administration. It's a miracle we every survived this far as a race without these critical safe-guards, but not one we should take for granted.
He's touching me!
He's touching me!
He's touching me!
He's touching me!
Make him stop!
All children will be issued a polymer bubble that they must use when at school. Exiting your bubble is not allowed, without express permission of a teacher, the school nurse, and either the principle or vice principle. To insure that sufficient physical activity is performed, once an hour at the sound of the buzzer, the students will roll out to the P.E. field and run laps. To aid in the proper identification of each student, they will be issued a school jersey with an individualized number in large clear writing. The student that finishes first on each run will be allowed first drink at the giant water bottle. Parents are encouraged to participate by watching these 'races' and encouraging their favorites and partaking of our Parimutuel betting. We are currently working to secure a deal with several sports channels for broadcasting of these activities. All of which are expected to aid in our fund raising, and as such, will reduce the need for our bake sales down to only 3 per year.
Thank you, and please support our school.
Whoever came up with this policy should get a good firm handshake. And then we can fire the sorry hypocrite.
In SOVIET RUSSIA... erm...NSA AMERICA, the Internet logs onto YOU!
How many days of detention did he get for tapping people's shoes? One, two, three...
Laughter is the Spackle of the Soul.
To the tune of "I Touch Myself":
[choras]
I don't want
Anybody else
When I think about me
I touch myself
OOOooohhhhh
I don't want :D
Anybody else
Oh no Oh no Oh no OOOOOooooohhhh
Then in Washington D.C. The Grease Man plays the track of the girl with her "Radio Man".
Mmmm mmm mmmm .... Radio Man.
Mmmm mmm mmm mmm ... Radio Man.
Mmm mmm mmm uuuuuuuuuu Ooooooohhhhhh .... Radio Man! 3 :D
When my daughter was in high school, the school district announced at one point that they were going to ban all public displays of affection, no matter how casual. It became known as the "no-hugging rule".
Although I don't know what the reaction was at other schools, at my daughter's school "hug-ins" and hugging sessions were organized via facebook and texting. Kids would have massive group hugs during recess, designated "hug monitors" would hug everyone who went by in the hallway, (daughter was one such) and hugging became the common greeting. A few days into it I asked daughter how it was going. She said the principal had made an announcement that they were not going to adopt that particular guideline.
Point is, change can be wrought, even by children. If all (or most) of the kids held hands at every recess on every day, what could the authorities do? Suspend the entire school?
This kind of thing only continues when the people don't stand up to it.
Oliver's law of assumed responsibility: If you're seen fixing it, you will be blamed for breaking it.
I think there are way too many lawyers and like-minded people who try to solve things be throwing regulations at them without even trying to understand the consequences.
I'm all for smart regulations that try to regulate systems optimally, but this is way too much, far beyond worrysome and not even funny !!
We learn from history that we learn nothing from history - Tom Veneziano
Instead of the Pledge of Alligance to the striped colored cloth on a stick, student could act and sing Divinyl's 1991 video.
"..when I think about you, I touch myself...."
the mayor isn't the only canadian smokin' crack...
this is just a placeholder till i send back my real sig from the future.
There has to be somebody from the USA involved... Are they sick of all the stupid headlines never talking about Canadian idiots?
Perhaps this is more clever - a way to ban everything normal and then SELECTIVELY apply the rules - copying what is done with US law.
Democracy Now! - uncensored, anti-establishment news
I can already imagine the face on parents or adults face when the school admin says out loud "It's ok now, its fixed, you can all touch yourselves".... naughty toughts incoming lmao
A school in British Columbia (the province that now even California can call flakey)
Not very Canadian of you - eh?
It must have been something you assimilated. . . .
I think it's more that (other than janitors) men have more or less disappeared from most elementary schools in the last generation. There's a strong emphasis on protecting, and not at all one on letting kids learn "the hard way" from mistakes. Everything is supposed to be cooperative, and nothing is supposed to be competitive. There's a place for that, sure, but when that's the only ethos then things are seriously out of balance.
Space game using normal deck of cards: http://BattleCards.org
Kids are little heathens using too many of Earth's resources. I applaud anyone who can fuck them up.
Glorious and free
Just be sure to not touch me
I'm a consultant - I convert gibberish into cash-flow.
These stories that you read are not isolated, nor are they down to 'over-zealous' individuals. In the UK, the equivalent are schools fingerprinting the kids, schools putting cameras in the bathrooms and changing rooms, and schools running un-announced exercises, like fake shootings, fake hostage takings, and fake UFO crashes (yes, really).
In the UK, these projects occur in locations where the social-economic power of the parents is low, and the people running their kids' schools have ZERO connection or empathy with with people of the locality. In the UK, the organisation COMMON PURPOSE targets as many middle manage types as possible, and identifies those individuals depraved and stupid enough to be willing to implement such projects in their own schools.
So, you get head teachers BANNING parents from taking photos/videos at their children's school plays (and YET, when the press questions officials from the education department, they DENY any such policy is appropriate or reasonable). While people attempting to find ANY official documentation from government departments encouraging such behaviour by head teachers have ZERO success, the heads engaging in such projects NEVER suffer censure or dismissal, and the number of examples of such behaviour in schools in the UK and USA grows exponentially each year.
Dirty little shills will now down-vote this comment, and reply that any suggestion that increasing waves of abusive behaviour in schools is in any way co-ordinated is the thinking of 'conspiracy idiots'. These dirty shills will tell you that if you cannot find official government publications detailing the promotion of such projects, that means the events themselves are nothing but coincidence- just like these dirty little shills told you a few years back that rumours of full surveillance NSA spying were the ravings of deluded tin-foil hat wearing fools.
Of course, for every head teacher they persuade to implement a "no touch" policy, another 20 will have responded with horror when they were 'tapped' to see if they would go along with a similar scheme. It doesn't matter. The Fabians KNOW you normalise obscenities like this wave by wave. After the first wave, cretins within socially 'weak' communities will start asking why the same policies are not active in THEIR schools. The first time a little girl is bullied by a little boy, plenty of parents will say "this wouldn't have happened if WE had a no-touch policy as well".
Those opposing such horrors will be depicted as "pro-bullying" in wave 2, and wave 2 will convert far more schools than wave one.
These societal changes are arranged at the highest levels, by the star chambers that really rule over you. In the UK, for instance, a star chamber project to raise the school leaving age to 18, as a path to a 21st Century form of compulsory conscription (national service), is currently in its penultimate stage. The project began BEFORE the time of Tony Blair (unknown to as good as 100% of UK citizens) and was NEVER a voting issue at any UK election. Blair fast-tracked the project, putting a particularly VILE individual in charge, David Blunkett. Unbeknown to 99.9% of the British public, Blunkett still heads the body overseeing the project, even though Blunkett is known as a 'Labour' politician, and Britain has had an apparent Liberal/Conservative government for years now.
Blunkett's body is a star chamber creation, and cannot be effected by any current public facing parliamentary action. In another year or so, 18 will be the legal school leaving age, and the inability of parents to coerce unwilling young adults to attend school (along with claimed high unemployment figures amongst young people) will be the official excuse to introduce national service- the fabian goal all along. The UK model of 21st Century conscription will be exported to the USA and West Europe.
Blair's people have only to recruit the support of a tiny number of current heads working in British and American schools to guarantee a long term effect in social engineering. This they have done easily. The projects proceed a little differently in the USA than in the UK because of cultural differences, but the goals are identical.
One school out of one thousand and nineteen does something stupid, so the OP automatically tars and feathers the entire province? So how exactly does that work?
Feed the need: Digitaladdiction.net
When they grow up, these kids will be moving out into the northern woods to live in a cabin with no company other than their trusty malamute and the neighborhood moose. So getting them used to no human contact might be a good idea.
Have gnu, will travel.
Cantada - yes, thank you I did just make that up
Because this doesn't seem like tech news
Join the Slashcott! Feb 10 thru Feb 17!
It seems that these days safety is all important. When I see the announcement these days they are 'Have a safe holiday'. No mention of having fun during the holidays. Even in the elementary school that my kids go to, it's all about safety in the playground. Whereas for many years all grades were allowed in both playgrounds, suddenly with a new principle one of the playgrounds was deemed too dangerous for kids.
I'm fine if one of my kids gets hurt in a game, that's just part of growing up. Sometimes teachers lose track that the goal of an education is to prepare someone for real life.
I think all administrators and teacher and parents should be required to read the following:
http://georgedpcarlin.wordpress.com/2012/07/09/george-carlin-on-children/
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA Typical. Just ban everything that could potential result in a negative context. No longer have to worry about it. Dust hands off. Let's forget about all the positives that are now lost and the resulting negatives that will surely come about.
If I'm not allowed to touch little kids then they shouldn't be able to either.
Leave it to slashdot to champion touching kids.
... is the only 100% proven effective way to stop the spread of cooties! Finally someone is taking the necessary measures to rid our country of this abominable abomination. I for one am welcome our overlords for finally being those someones that think of the children.
This is insane.
My 5 year old is a tactile person, he hugs all his friends as greeting, or just for the hell of it, and engages in physical play all the time. His older brother doesn't like physical contact, or at least pretends to not like it. In reality he likes physical contact as well, he just doesn't like to show he likes it. I shudder to think what being told they weren't allowed physical contact with their friends at school would do to them, they would both suffer though and I can't see us keeping them at such a school.
of the people implementing this kind of restriction on kids. Maybe they are passing on their own childhood traumatizition?
... N
Heee touched me!! No, I did not! Yes you did! No..... Yes
And the Feminisation of our school system continues.
Is it any wonder that boys continue to do worse and worse at school.
Troll is not a replacement for I disagree.
"NO TOUCHING!"
The best thing about UDP jokes is I don't care if you get them or not
I checked a number of other articles and it is only a temporary ban and it was because they were having problems with the kids and excessive rough housing. While I agree the school went a little to far I think this temporary ban has gotten blown way out of proportion.
from touching themselves. I keep seeing this image of a bunch of kids playing sardines wearing Steve Martin style full body condoms.
...having to figure out when a touch is inappropriate or bullying is hard.
How do they feel about holding your finger about an inch from the other person while yelling, "I'm not touching you" repeatedly in a loud and whiny voice?
I can see it now.
Red rover, red rover, send Kenny right over... wait... stop... STOP!!!
These comments are my own and do not necessarily reflect the views or opinions of my employer or colleagues...
Actually, I'm sure it has happened elsewhere, but when I was in junior high school, they banned book bags, on the grounds that in two years, they founds two firearms. But this no-touching thing trumps all other absurdities.
Over a century ago, In the age before vaccines and antibiotics, mortality from childhood diseases was once rampant. Orphanages -- which featured dense concentrations of deprived and often poorly-nourished children -- were especially vulnerable to mass outbreaks, which could sometimes wipe out entire cohorts. With the development of germ theory, a new idea emerged for a solution to the terrible mortality rates that were common in those institutions.
Henceforth, orphans would be brought up with a minimum of human contact, carefully separated from each other. Caretakers would handle them only when necessary, and with all the accouterments of modern hygiene. Thanks to the carefully enforced isolation, disease outbreaks plummeted. Unfortunately, the children did not do as well as hoped.
Infants and young children became listless and depressed; they stopped eating, lost weight, and withered away. Survivors were often emotionally damaged, either failing to form attachments or forming them abnormally. It quickly became clear that frequent attention and contact was a vital part of human growth and development, every bit as necessary for survival as essentials such as food or warmth. More than any other reason, this new understanding led to the decline and eventual demise of orphanages in the West, and it's replacement by the system of adoption and fostering we use today.
After a student was found to have been inappropriately touching all the other boys in their jockey shorts area in a bullying fashion (7th grade), touching was banned at a school near me for grades 4-8. They felt it would help the kids get over the trauma of the bad touches, and ensure no one else would pick up on doing that.
Two years later, the kids joke about how they're not supposed to touch each other, don't know/remember why it ever started, and the ban is pretty much not enforced. But sometimes there's a reason such bans are put in place.
No, slashdot pigs, I won't give more details about the inappropriate touching.
Might as well face it I'm addicted to data.
Trying to ban and control everything.
You can't play musical suffix/prefix with agency names.
Are you being a usage nutsy for the sake of being a usage nutsy? In an informal discussion environment such as Slashdot, I prefer to assume good faith and assume "or foreign counterparts" where applicable. For example, "RIAA" includes CRIA, ARIA, etc., and "Child Protective Services" includes Child Protection Services. Of course, none of this applies if agencies in different countries are being contrasted, but I don't see that contrast at all in this particular context.
...if only because it gives me a perfect excuse to send my kid to school ENTIRELY encased in bubble wrap, plus a snorkeling mask and snorkel.
I'm pretty sure when they were younger, my sons would have gleefully done it.
-Styopa
AFAIK, an IQ of 100 is technically the median score (50% above, 50% below). Of course the average (mean) score could be significantly less than one hundred if the dumb people are exceptionally dumb and the smart people are only a little bit smarter than median...
Don't let your kids catch stupidity! It's spread by touching!
Need I say more? Who do you think is behind this endless bullshit, the constant attacks on people's freedoms?
If this spreads, hockey will be a very different game in a few years.
Imagine a sea of "im not touching you! im not touching you!"
You meant Leslie Nielsen (RIP)
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=hh4yp07UKEg&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3Dhh4yp07UKEg
If you don't want your kids touching, keep them at home. What has our world come to!
Here's hoping we can get low-life relatives to stop attempting to put the touch on us.
"I believe in Karma. That means I can do bad things to people all day long and I assume they deserve it." : Dogbert
In British Columbia tag, if you're it, you're it forever.
I would like to say ITS ABOUT FUCKING TIME. Yes, I know this seems ridiculous, but its the only way to protect the weak from the "no blood, no foul" policy of the old days where after a solid beating on the playground, you would then get persecuted by your teachers for being a baby and interrupting their smoke break by crying at them.
My kids' elementary school banned running at recess and gym. They also couldn't use bats so they had to hit the wiffle ball with their arm. So glad they've moved on to middle school where they're slightly less paranoid.
A post a day keeps productivity at bay.
Let's say that there is indeed a crazy parent trying to sue them over something. I'm thinking, perhaps the school resisted but they're over the top. Someone gets an idea : why not just comply to their silly rule/idea/grievance/whatever, call the press, get some attention, have things return to normal and shut the particular annoyance up.
This has gotten some preeeetty bad press in the local papers and I'm confident that the school and school board are getting some phone calls about it...So looks like it might be a fait accompli.
No doubt this is due to corporate lobbying from the bubble soccer industrialists.
Can the teachers touch their students ?
No ?
Why don't the schools simply bind everyone in strait jackets then ??
Muchas Gracias, Señor Edward Snowden !
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vlv6BrrxD_4
Finally a school is doing something about them
Fuck Canada and their flapping heads .|..
By the time this news spreads to /., the principal has already pulled the ban for two days (kids have been once again able to punch each other on the playground for the last two days). I saw it on the news, then on another news channel, then the next day the principle changed it back, and that was 2 days ago. And now its on /.
There ought to be a law... that regulates our lawmakers. One of them is that they need to pass a sanity test each time they make a law that doesn't.
Assorted stuff I do sometimes: Lemuria.org
This thread is about touching, not making gun fingers, yet you come along and claim "It's not about kids safetly, it's TAKIN' MUH GUNS AWAAAA!".
It's several things:
1) Parents won't take responsibility for their kids, their kids are angels and don't you DARE accuse them of being bullies!
2) Teachers don't do anything other than draw a fat government check and can't be fired. Look at how my little angel is being bullied at school, yet the teachers do nothing about it!
3) The school system wants kids to learn OBEDIENCE. Authority is ALWAYS right.
4) Sue-happy assholes. See #1 and #2
5) Bugger all teachers, lots of kids. Therefore teachers can't oversee the kids any more: there's no spare time to do that and too many kids to look at.
6) The accusation of kiddie fiddling or even potential fiddling is enough to kill the career, if not the actual accused, so adults, especially male, hanging around kids or touching them is a danger to actual life for the teacher.
If I can't touch them, nobody can.
So... huddle time? Instant empty school because everybody is in detention.