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User: PakProtector

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Comments · 1,011

  1. Re:Solve the War on Terrorism. on UK's Chief Scientist Backs Nuclear Power Revival · · Score: 2, Funny
    Also Hitler.

    Come now, as a person of German Descent, I can tell you the thing that everyone knows about Hitler's election. It was settled in the time honored German fashion: First one to burn down the Reichstag is Chancellor.

  2. Re:This is NeWz?! on Velociraptor Bad At Disemboweling · · Score: 2, Interesting
    Yes .. we were all so overtaken by the fat kid's response to Dr. Alan Grant's demonstration of the CLAW that we paid no attention to it's clear roundedness and inability to CUT flesh. .

    class hollywood Lights. . Camera. . (hey fat kid they outlawed cake) ACTION!! deception.

    Long pointy rounded things cannot also slice flesh. . this is NEWS?! I surely hope we're not paying these SCIENTISTS .. MY tax dollars to make these types of discoveries.

    I worked at a Humane Society for several months and one of my coworkers there was once given a nearly half-inch deep gash by a cat clawing her. Are you still so sure that a round, pointed object cannot slice flesh?

  3. Re:Problem with biometrics on Cell Phones Learn to Recognize Their Owners' Faces · · Score: 1
    Yep, instead of losing a finger or getting your face pushed into a scanner (Solid Snake style) you get tortured for *hours* until you're willing to giveup not just your password but the whereabouts of the safe, your wife and children and those military secrets you never told anyone about. Good plan.

    Hey, if you include a free 'Recantation of Your Helio-centric Heresy' in that thing, I think we're good to go!

  4. Re:Very interesting idea on Cell Phones Learn to Recognize Their Owners' Faces · · Score: 1
    Studies have repeatedly shown that human beings can only reliably tell apart other people of the same race, and that they cannot distinguish between people of other races barring obvious differences in size or hair color (i.e. no discerning facial features). Will this software have the same problem> I wonder if it was only programmed to see differences in Japanese faces?

    That's funny, I'm a White Anglo Tueton Unitarian Pagan (WAT UP), and I'd give probablitiy greater than .99 I'm masturbating to Utada Hikaru instead of some other Japanese Woman's picture.

  5. Re:Aliens? on Maps Show Mars Was Once More Like Earth · · Score: 1
    Not "series" like a "trilogy", but rather several novels written against the same milieu. Niven's "Protector" is wholly devoted to the Pak, but they are also featured in:
    "The Ringworld Engineers"
    "The Ringworld Throne"
    "Ringworld's Children"

    As I'm sure you know, based on your handle. :^)

    Oh, you mean the Historical Documents?

  6. Re:Aliens? on Maps Show Mars Was Once More Like Earth · · Score: 1
    It's toward the galactic core. It was destroyed in the core explosion, 10000 years ago.

    The original poster was referring to Larry Niven's Pak from the Known Space series of books, specifically "Protector."

    What do you mean, 'Series of Books?'

    Sincerely, Brennan-monster.

  7. Re:So what happened? on Maps Show Mars Was Once More Like Earth · · Score: 1
    What offed the Martians? Global warming, nuclear war, terrorism..?

    Ice Comet.

    And it wasn't so much terrorism as it was genocide.

    Sincerely, Brennan-monster.

    PS: You're welcome.

  8. Re:Aliens? on Maps Show Mars Was Once More Like Earth · · Score: 1

    We Pak evolved from mutated Food Yeast, too. Don't you recall the Slaver War?

  9. Re:Aliens? on Maps Show Mars Was Once More Like Earth · · Score: 2, Insightful
    Seeing as how we do not behave exactly like every other animal, would there be a way that we could have come from Mars? Perhaps Adam and Eve were real and the first couple to come.
    Rubbish. We came from the Pak homeworld.

    Yes, yes you all did.

    Now, if you breeders would simply shut up and let us Adults do the thinking, things would get better.

    Sincerely, Brennan-monster.

  10. Re:This is the proof we needed! on Four Millennia Old Noodles Found In China · · Score: 1

    I'm an ordained minister, and have been so for about 4 years now. On days that begin with M and W, I spend my time in thinking about a Tail-swallowing universe. On days beginning with T, I think about an Enternal Universe. On Days starting with S, I eat Spaghetti. On days that start with F, I just give out to sheer solopsist debauchery and say I'm a Christian.

  11. Re:isn't it obvious to you all? on More Evidence For Hobbit Sized Species · · Score: 1
    They were placed there through the grace of His Noodly Appendage to test our faith, duh!

    Heretic! Blasphemer! Repent your sins now! This is clearly the work of Eris, Our Lady of Discord and Hotdog Buns, showing us what happens when you've had a few too many pints of Ambrosia.

    That, or it's now Wednesday where I am.

    She likes to do this sort of thing.

  12. Re:article text on When to Leave That First Tech Job · · Score: 1

    Oh, and nuke plants don't explode.

    Chernobyl !!!

    Relevant quote:

    On Saturday, April 26, 1986, at 1:23:58 a.m. local time, the fourth reactor of the Chernobyl power plant--known as Chernobyl-4--suffered a catastrophic steam explosion that resulted in a fire, a series of additional explosions, and a nuclear meltdown.

    You forgot the most important part.

    There are two conflicting official theories about the cause of the accident. The first was published in August 1986 and effectively placed the blame solely on the power plant operators. The second theory was published in 1991 and attributed the accident to flaws in the RBMK reactor design, specifically the control rods. Both commissions were heavily lobbied by different groups, including the reactors designers, Chernobyl power plant personnel, and the government. Some independent experts now believe that neither theory is completely correct.
  13. Re:Buddhism seems to have a clue on The Science Of Happiness · · Score: 1

    As someone who has been studying Zen and a practicing Buddhist for some time, I would say that this is true, atleast in my case. I really am happier. It's not strictly that I'm bubbly like a cheerleader all day, but it's that everything just seems good. Even when bad things happen, and when I actually am sad, I can't stay that way, because, well, everything is just so good.

    I can't put the feeling into words. I've tried, but it can't be explained, you have to experience it for yourself.

    I can keep calm and happy during bad events, and I can count on one hand the number of times I've actually gotten angry in the past month.

    It's very nice and agreeable.

  14. Re:What's the best solution? on Condensing Your Life on to a USB Flash Drive? · · Score: 1
    Good enough for Ceasar is good enough for me

    Caesar Stolode Est

  15. Re:Finally on Intelligent Coasters Keep Beer Mugs Full · · Score: 1
    Eventually, this technology will be implantable. If not incorporated into the beer itself. Nanosensors and data aggregators will form a network in and about you, measuring everything from mood to liver enzyme capability, capable of automatically signalling the bartender based not only on the emptiness of the glass, but the emptiness of your glass, belly, wallet, hopes, and/or bladder.
    Fuck that. Just bring me a goddamn beer and leave my belly and bladder out of it.

    Dr. Evil, you can keep your beer, and your coaster. I want the Bartendress.

  16. Re:Heart Skip on Giant Squid Caught on Film · · Score: 1

    Hey, now! As a heterosexual male who has no problem in acknowledging the physical beauty of other men (After all, ain't Michelangeo's David a beautiful piece of art?), I will venture to say that Wil Wheaton is a very sexy man, and if I were gay, he and Jude Law would be the only ones for me.

    That's right. Wil Wheaton is as handsome as Jude Law.

  17. Re:Crash? on ESA Selects Targets for Asteroid Deflection Test · · Score: 1, Informative
    Just because you lack the information to accurately determine their future states does not mean they behave unpredictably.

    I'd say the fact that I can't predict something's behaviour (accurately determine) makes it unpredictable, wouldn't you?

  18. Re:Huge mistakes on RIAA Suit Rejected With Prejudice · · Score: 1

    It's Stare Decisis, not Stari Decisis. It's latin. It means, roughly, "To Stay the Decision."

  19. Re:has to be said. on Korea To Build Front-line Combat Robot · · Score: 1

    Yeah... I, for one, would love to have my own Sarah Michelle Gellar-bot.

  20. Re:Books are victorious on Games Can Make Us Cry · · Score: 1

    Personally, I found Final Fantasy II (American II) much more gripping than Final Fantasy VII ever was. I cried when Palom and Porim sacrificed themselves for the group.

  21. Re:Find a Chair Before the Tune Stops on Major Microsoft Re-Organization · · Score: 1

    You, sirruh, have been the only ray of sunshine in this otherwise tedious day.

  22. Re:John Henry on Next NASA Centennial Challenge Competition · · Score: 1
    I know, let's put a penal colony on the moon! That way, we'd have cheap labor there, and could remove troublesome elements from our society. At least until they start raining gravity bombs on our head...

    Hey, Mike? Where are you? Can we get on this thing? I'm thinking we'll call it 'Little David's Sling.'

  23. Re:Names... on Running out of Hurricane Names · · Score: 1
    I'm just waiting for Hurrican Xerxes to be turned back around by 300 sandbags on the tip of Key West.

    Oooh, Sting! That's right, c'mon, give it up for Sparta! In your face, Persians!

    Don't tell me I'm the only person around here who knows some History?

  24. Re:Record set in 1933 on Running out of Hurricane Names · · Score: 2, Funny

    I hold that Vikings were Pirates, and therefore we're all doomed.

  25. Re:I thought the same thing... on New System to Counter Photo and Video Devices · · Score: 3, Informative
    The military already has lasers designed to temporarily blind you.
    Actually, they have lasers designed to permanently blind you.

    Actually, they shouldn't. It is against the Geneva convention to use devices such as lasers to cause blindness. Death's okay. But blindness is verboten.