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User: outsider007

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Comments · 981

  1. The punchline on Sumo Wrestler Steals Cash Machine From Moscow Shop · · Score: 1

    Pardon me, officer, I was just trying to check my rolling balance.

    Or something about the rising costs of all-you-can-eat sushi buffets

  2. Re:You are being brute-forced on Coping With 1 Million SSH Authentication Failures? · · Score: 1

    5) Sleep peacefully at night.

    until the pc that your keys were on gets a virus and you decide to wipe it forgetting that you had some important stuff on there.

  3. Re:I support this. on California To Create Public Animal Abuser Registry · · Score: 1

    If we follow this logic we would also need a bed wetters registry.

  4. Re:A Clockwork Orange on Using Classical Music As a Form of Social Control · · Score: 1

    This thread gives me a nice warm vibraty feeling all through me gutty-whats

  5. Re:Solution on $1M Prize For Finding Cause of Unintended Acceleration · · Score: 1

    Actually, a good way to improve your gas mileage is to draft behind soccer moms and then 'tokyo drift' around them at the last moment to pass.
    I find it reduces my carbon footprint significantly.

  6. Re:Half Power on The LHC Is Back Online · · Score: 1

    Because they are half-wits.

    No it's because they realized they only need 1.21 jiggawatts

  7. Re:So THAT's why! on The LHC Is Back Online · · Score: 2, Funny

    The nature of reverse causality distortion fields is such that events immediately preceding a bubble are the most affected by it.
    We can consider ourselves lucky that the worst is over and that it was only relatively minor quakes.
    Furthermore since we can assume that scientists in the future will be able to resolve these issues, it's likely that these quakes will eventually never have happened at all.

  8. Re:Here come the shackles. on NHTSA Has No Software Engineers To Analyze Toyota · · Score: 1

    I used to work as a QA engineer for a company that develops firmware for critical automotive parts among other things.

    So are you getting a kick out of these replies?

  9. Re:Flawed system. on NGO Networks In Haiti Cause Problems For ISPs · · Score: 4, Insightful

    The aid groups are not 'donating internets' as a relief measure, they just need the networks to be up to run their operation.
    The networks are temporary and it doesn't sound like the NGOs have a problem working with local ISPs so no big deal.
    I guess the story is about greedy ISPs but hey, these guys have been through hell too and they have a right to want things to get back to normal.

  10. Re:Easy headline to misread on Breaking the Squid Barrier · · Score: 2, Funny

    That's ok, I thought it was about gays in the military.

  11. Re:yes, but on New Interactive Black Hole Simulation Published · · Score: 0, Redundant

    maybe if the black hole was on uranus...

  12. Re:Yeah, it's called blissful ignorance on Brain Surgery Linked To Sensation of Spirituality · · Score: 1

    Religion is different from spirituality.
    Really they're almost opposites.

  13. I agree on Appeals Court Rules On Internet Obscenity Standards · · Score: 2, Funny

    The onus should fall upon the pornographers to keep their content out of Florida's tubes.

  14. Re:Make mine from Ruritanium on First Room-Temperature Germanium Laser Completed · · Score: 1

    Yeah, I was going to go with something about space nazis but then I thought, oh whatever.

  15. sprinkle parmesan? on Students Failing Because of Poor Grammar · · Score: 2, Funny

    One professor says that students 'think commas are sort of like parmesan cheese that you sprinkle on your words.'

    I guess on a professor's salary they can only afford the processed stuff.
    In my house we freshly grate our commas directly over our words.

  16. Re:Well, a lot of people drive Volkswagens on Scientists To Breed the Auroch From Extinction · · Score: 4, Funny

    A pig would better - they could market it as jew-rassic pork.

  17. Good Idea on Robotics Prof Fears Rise of Military Robots · · Score: 3, Funny

    Automating the death panel process is a good way to save taxpayers money.
    Also since robots eat old people's medicine for food, they will basically be self-powered.

  18. Re:Bribery on Mark Cuban's Plan To Kill Google · · Score: 1

    many don't know this but when you scroll down past the ads and crap on experts exchange results page you see the actual answers without having to be a member.

  19. first on Decline In US Newspaper Readership Accelerates · · Score: 0, Offtopic

    washington post

  20. Re:interesting responses on Save the Planet, Eat Your Dog · · Score: 1

    Something you might not have considered is that your father identifies with the dog because like pets, old people are treated as 'disposable' when their health problems raise 'quality of life' concerns. If you've recently encouraged him to make a living will you could have made it a lot worse. I'm not saying you did anything wrong, btw.

  21. Re:Good grief.. on Save the Planet, Eat Your Dog · · Score: 1

    Yeah they say it about hummers and suv's too. Basically anybody who has something you want must have a small penis.

  22. Re:Good grief.. on Save the Planet, Eat Your Dog · · Score: 1

    If this is true then it turns the argument for walking or riding a bike on its ear.
    I imagine food calories cost more per mile than gas does

  23. Re:Ya well on 1/3 of People Can't Tell 48Kbps Audio From 160Kbps · · Score: 1

    Wow, that product really makes me think Denon is a douchebag company.
    I wonder if the sales on that thing are going to make up for the damage to their brand.

  24. Re:WHAT!! on The Ultimate Limit of Moore's Law · · Score: 4, Funny

    I plan on setting up server farms in parallel dimensions

  25. Re:Baby with the bath water? on Why the FBI Director Doesn't Bank Online · · Score: 1

    P.S. That's why banks must identify themselves with a security image or 'sitekey' before you enter your password.
    Once you recognize that you can expect to be safe.