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User: paiute

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Comments · 2,289

  1. They need to leapfrog the tech on India's ICBM Will Carry Multiple Nuclear Warheads · · Score: 4, Funny

    India should be working on improved stick technology so they can win WWIV.

  2. Re:Overseas laws on Singapore Seeks Even More Control Over Online Media · · Score: 1

    works great when you can use the two magic words: nuclear fucking weapons

    I thought the two magic words were precious bodily fluids.

  3. Re:What kind of encryption did the FBI break? on Judge Orders Child Porn Suspect To Decrypt His Hard Drives · · Score: 2

    they're trying to set a legal precedented to override the 5th for future cases, IMHO.

    I am not a lawyer, but I suspect that even the most evil SC we can imagine will determine that if a suspect is not subject to prosecution in the absence of an action, then that action is protected.

  4. Re:FBI shits on the constitution. on Judge Orders Child Porn Suspect To Decrypt His Hard Drives · · Score: 5, Funny

    I'm one hour away from full decryption and sellout of the entire USA economy, and you can't stop me.

    No, but your mom can. She just called down the stairs that your Hot Pockets are done.

  5. Re:Diplomatic blunder? on Star Wars Episode 4 To Be Dubbed In Navajo · · Score: 3, Funny

    Dub in Navajo
    Show it to the Japanese
    Popcorn on the floor

  6. Re: Why would a celebrity on Canadian Man Pleads Guilty In Celebrity Hacking and Harrassment Case · · Score: 1

    She's an idiot, if she would have just paid a "hacker" to claim to hack her phone it would have been on /. Seriously does anyone believe these sex tape and hacked phone stories anymore? Ever since Paris Hilton went from zero to famous (well, more famous, famous beyond "daddy owns hotels") from her sex tape every attention whore has been doing it.

    Seriously. Have you noticed that Erin Andrews is all over the place now? Why is that?

  7. Diplomatic blunder? on Star Wars Episode 4 To Be Dubbed In Navajo · · Score: 5, Funny

    Dub in Navajo.

    Show it in Japan.

    Just to piss them off.

  8. I disagree on Eric Schmidt: Teens' Mistakes Will Never Go Away · · Score: 1

    He said, "You have to fight for your privacy, or you will lose it." This is quite different from his infamous 2009 remark: "If you have something that you don't want anyone to know, maybe you shouldn't be doing it in the first place."

    Different and yet the same. These two statements are simply reflections of the current reality.

  9. I love this show on AT&T Quietly Adds Charges To All Contract Cell Plans · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Congressperson: That's fucked up. I should introduce legislation which would allow the consumer to get out of their contract if the carrier breaks it like this.
    AT&T lobbyist: (Opens suitcase full of cash.)
    Congressperson. Free market!

  10. Outrage! on Web of Tax Shelters Saved Apple Billions, Inquiry Finds · · Score: 5, Funny

    Congress needs to mount an investigation to find the batch of idiots who wrote these tax laws which allow corporations to do this!

  11. Re:not a fan on Review: Star Trek: Into Darkness · · Score: 2

    I'd like to see what Steven Moffat could do with Star Trek.

  12. Nope on Why We Should Build a Supercomputer Replica of the Human Brain · · Score: 2

    No, you cannot make a supercomputer which will be a replica of the human brain. First of all, we don't know enough about the biochemical workings of the brain to do that. Every day the literature contains papers in which the incredibly complex soup inside cells shows us some ridiculous interaction we could not have predicted.

    It would be the equivalent of building a lemonade stand, staffing it with a five-year-old, and claiming that you were replicating the US economy.

  13. The last damn stray on UN Says: Why Not Eat More Insects? · · Score: 1

    I was uneasy when the UN black copters came over to try and take my guns and when they tried to take over the Web - but making me eat bugs is too much. The resistance begins today!

  14. Here it comes on Supreme Court Rules For Monsanto In Patent Case · · Score: 0

    This case will join the McDonalds' spilled coffee suit in the "spark the knee-jerking hall of fame".

  15. Re:WTF? on Microsoft May Acquire Nook Tablet Business From Barnes and Noble · · Score: 1

    It was B&N was getting out of clicks to focus on bricks.

    The B&N CEO must have just read The Road Ahead.

  16. Cro-Magnons and us on English May Have Retained Words From an Ice Age Language · · Score: 1

    Cave teen: "And then I was like all, ug!, y'know?"

  17. Re:It display at least one thing on Xkcd's Long-running "Time" Comic: Work of Art Or Nerd Sniping? · · Score: 5, Insightful

    If anything, it shows how bored we are with the internet and that ANY new content sparks interest, however trivial.

    In my head I hear my response in Louis C. K.'s voice: You've got a slab of plastic and metal you can carry around under your arm that lets you look up the answer to any question, have a text conversation in real time with anyone on the planet, access all the works of art ever created - and you're bored. Seriously. I just searched the word 'artichoke' and got 9.9 million links in under a second. And you are jaded. That's not even good enough to hold your attention anymore?

  18. Need expert opinion on Fermi and Swift Observe Record-setting Gamma Ray Burst · · Score: 4, Interesting

    How close would one of these events have to be to us to fuck us up?

  19. The future is here at last on AI System Invents New Card Games (For Humans) · · Score: 1

    No flying cars yet, but apparently we have Uniblab in alpha.

    http://www.thewb.com/shows/the-jetsons/uniblab/d1a360bc-3f5e-478f-86b8-81e8768c823d

  20. Re:Google glasses on Google Glass Is the Future — and the Future Has Awful Battery Life · · Score: 1

    I'm going to start making shirts with IR LEDs sewn into them.

    Remember not to wear one to the airport. http://www.boston.com/news/globe/city_region/breaking_news/2007/09/mit_student_arr.html

  21. Re:Google glasses on Google Glass Is the Future — and the Future Has Awful Battery Life · · Score: 1

    Great. That's where the camera is. I'll have some wonderful footage to provide the cops....

    Not if he follows you for five hours beforehand.

  22. Re:ah the anti-NSF crowd again on SOPA Creator Now In Charge of NSF Grants · · Score: 1

    ...funding the study of beetles migration habits? yeah I dont think we need to waste money on that one

    Until those beetle you ignore start boring into and killing the trees you were counting on for lumber and paper or eating your corn crop. Then you will cry and moan and complain about those damn scientists not studying the important things.

  23. This is what they are talking about on EU To Ban Neonicotinoid Insecticides · · Score: 1

    For the curious, this is a neonicotinoid insecticide:
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Imidacloprid

    It is neonicotinoid because it resembles nicotine:
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nicotine

    Which is why some organic pesticide tea recipes call for steeping plug chewing tobacco in water and using that extract on your plants.

  24. Re:Kind of innevitable and entirely reasonable on Canada Revenue Agency To Tax BitCoin Transactions · · Score: 1

    Let me guess. You get to define what belongs in the "real" economy. Is it full of true Scotmen?

  25. Someone hasn't read their Twain on Politician Wants Sci-fi To Be Mandatory In School · · Score: 1

    The surest way to turn kids off of science fiction is to make reading it mandatory in school.