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User: teamhasnoi

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  1. Who's hip to the real netquake? on Net Traffic Shocks Mimic Earthquakes · · Score: 2
    Shut up,
    already! Damn!
    Don't wait for your neighbor,

    Green Eggs and Ham!

    Doin' the netquake!!

    You know what I'm talkin' about?

  2. Whore Piss! It's not just for breakfast anymore! on Gaming Fuel: 4-way Shootout · · Score: 3, Funny

    Nutin' like a good, luke-warm, frothy glass of Whore Piss! Now with extra crack! The very memory of drinking this will keep you up for many a night!

  3. Bill Gates responsible for Linux? You Decide! on Is Red Hat the Microsoft of Linux? · · Score: 2
    Bill Gates is a man with a terrible secret! The secret is in his name! Some (secret, shh!)anagrams and their (oh so very secret) meanings:

    Legal Bits
    Stall Beg I
    Gab Sell It
    Beats Gill
    A Bill Gets

    And finally...

    All Bis Get

    Did I post this twice? You Decide!

  4. Re:A space alien...with A SECRET! on Is Red Hat the Microsoft of Linux? · · Score: 2
    The secret is in his name! Some anagrams and their meanings:

    Legal Bits
    Stall Beg I
    Gab Sell It
    Beats Gill
    A Bill Gets

    And finally...

    All Bis Get

  5. There's a joke somewhere in there... on Pig-to-Human Transplants On Their Way · · Score: 2
    about Pigs and Cops, but I'm not sure what it is.

    This is the perfect forum to try out your pork chops.

    Gotta wake up! Gotta wake up!

  6. Hookers and Blow on HOWTO Go About Marketing to Developers? · · Score: 4, Funny
    have always worked for me. Our sales are up, and so are our customers!

    Luv, Bill

  7. Re:There is already a list of ... on Police Database Lists 'Future Criminals' · · Score: 2

    You might also want to try Here, Here and...
    OMG!
    Here! They're planning something right now!

  8. You might want to try VueScan for your scans on Review: Mac OS X 10.2 Jaguar · · Score: 3, Informative
    This allows me to use my UMAX scanner from OS X. It's updated all the time, and works relly well. YMMV.

    What I find ironic, is that my mom is using the most advanced unix ever at home, while I'm still futzing with Windows. I knew there was a reason I go to work.

    I ran into the same problem with SharePoints and eventually had to move the entire pile of folders to my public folder to share. BAH!

    And I'm still trying to get a VNC server that works on OS X, then I could pretend that I have OS X 10.1 at home.

    See, I'd pretend 10.1, cause the connection would be slow.. :P

  9. Let's all work on the REAL bottlenecks... on Pentium 4 2.8GHz · · Score: 5, Funny
    Like Disk access, and video, and whatever else keeps me waiting for things to happen.

    I'm sorry (not), but I should NEVER have to wait for anything. Not with a P4 2.x Mirkwood. Or AMD 2xxx+ GTZ. I want instant reaction like Beos had. On my pentium 225. Click, Click. Off I go.

    Hard drives are fast(?) and cheap, but still saddled with the bloat code that gets written for this new stuff.

    OT, but I would like to see an office suite written by John Carmack. That would rule. Misspelled words would have 3d blood dripping out of them, and fast, fast, fast.

    Ok. Time for sleem.p

  10. Re:I just installed 10.2! on Mac OS X Switcher Stories · · Score: 2

    I'd compare Photoshop speeds, but I haven't timed stuff out yet. I guess what I mean by all this is that my PC feels faster. Isn't that what it's all about for the (average) desktop user?

  11. Re:Jobs' biggest mistake. on Mac OS X Switcher Stories · · Score: 2
    The funny thing is, they made this mistake back in the 80's (licenced the hardware, not the OS) and it nearly killed Apple. (Cheap beige boxes running OS 8.1)

    Had they licenced the OS, rather than the hardware, today /. would be bitching about the evil software monopoly Apple.

    And Bill would be asking me, "Do you want fries with that?"

  12. I just installed 10.2! on Mac OS X Switcher Stories · · Score: 2
    Wow. What an improvement! It doesn't seem like I'm running a mollasses machine anymore. I use OS X at work, and win xp/98 and Beos at home.

    At first I was glad to come home to 98 for ease, XP for stabillity, and Beos for zippy speed. OS X 10.1.x had me hating the Mac. Many of the problems plaguing my Mac was due to bugs and features that I (still) can't believe they left out.

    With 10.2, alot of the 'bugs' have been fixed, windows open a TON faster, the machine is far more responsive, and I have handwriting recognition too (which is just cool).

    Arguably, It should have been that way at the start, rather than me beta-testing 10.1.x. I can't say I'll be auctioning off my p4 1.8 (which still smokes the mac) anytime soon, but Apple is definitely becoming more tempting.

    If Apple gets faster hardware than my PC (blah, blah gigahertz/flops, whatever. IE opens in 2 seconds on my P4, and 8 on the mac 733) or if OpenBeos makes a strong case (which it will!) will make some of my decision to switch or not for me. The preceeding sentence was exceedingly poorly crafted. Thank you.

  13. Sony = Lick me where I pee. on Super Audio CDs Rolling Your Way · · Score: 2, Informative
    I have seen more articles on Sony and their attempts at denying the right of fair use then I care to.

    Celine be damned, the software that comes with the new Sony PCs, and their mp3 'solution' on the the minidisk player. ect, ect. Whatever. I haven't been buying Sony's overpriced crap-tronics, or their over-hyped and under-talented CDs and I won't be in the future.

    The giant will never fall unless *everyone* throws stones.

  14. Finally! A picture of the iphone! on Apple iPhone Rumors Resurface · · Score: 2

    Here it is. I guess it was 'borrowed' from Steve Jobs while he was testing it.

  15. Its all about the Chipset. on Intel, OEMs Face Lawsuit For Megahertz Marketing · · Score: 2
    I was in the market for a new PC a couple of months ago. I was leaning towards an AMD, but couldn't find a chipset that would work (reliably) with the audio programs I would be using.

    I now am typing this on a p4 1.8, and am quite happy with the performance, and stabillity with the intel chipset. Had Via solved the PCI bus bottleneck problem they were wrestling with, I would have gone with AMD. No dice, though.

    This is much faster than my P3 800, (and light years ahead of my p1 225) so I'm fine and happy with my purchase.

  16. Re:Xbox + Mouse + Keyboard, hmmm on Carmack Expounds on Doom III · · Score: 2
    I will be happy taking on those gamepad xboxers and showing them what the mouse and keyboard's all about.

    "How did he turn around so fast?"
    "I don't know."

  17. "Sir, we are getting strange results..." on NASA Plan to Read Brainwaves at Airports · · Score: 3, Funny

    "All the graphs are showing a big middle finger.."

  18. Mr. Jones, your house is ours! on Fragfest · · Score: 2
    That's right Mr. Jones, the house you so recently purchased, with the lovely empty basement, will be ours! The carnage that basement will see will exceed even the real WW2. Bwaaaahahaha..ha... ha.. ahem.

    Defuse ze dynamite!

  19. UK 600+, FBI 400+ Missing, Lost & Stolen Lapto on Crypto Leash for Laptops? · · Score: 2
    Perhaps these government agencies should look into this.

    A laptop in each hand, connected by a string running through their sleeves. Twice the computing power, and no more missing laptops!

    Just a thought.

  20. I laughed, I cried, I wept, I sighed. on User Friendly 1.0 · · Score: 2
    User Friendly looks like Funky Winkerbean meets Dilbert and has a kid who reads the Necronomicon, raises the corpse of Charles Shultz that marries Bill Keane and gives birth to an unholy creature that likes to scratch itself until it bleeds in the patterns approximating the strip you see.

    Like anything else, it's ok in small doses.

  21. Re:litter the hallways with corpses? on New DOOM III Shots · · Score: 2
    Or rats/big bugs that come and gradually eat away the fallen bodies. They don't need to attack you, but you could see how long something had been there by how large the corpse is, and how many scavengers are on/in it. eww.

    I can't wait. Will this run on my Pentium 60?

  22. Re:Photoshop on Linux will get people to use Linux on OSNews on the LinuxWorld Exhibition Floor · · Score: 2
    Gimp is great if only because it's free. Photoshop is able to do much more. Like get me jobs, allow me to finish them, and send them to people who can print them out.

    It's got nothing to do w/ nostalgia, Photoshop gets the job done. If Gimp did more than RGB, and was easier to use, then we'd see more people use it.

    I think the nostalgia is yours, for Gimp.

  23. Does this dumbass even HAVE a PC? on Paging Eliza: Patenting IM Bots · · Score: 2
    "I'm not familiar with that," Kay said in response to claims that interactive bots were in existence even before ActiveBuddy launched, with venture funding from Reuters and Wit Soundview.

    How about all the /. readers out there send him some links?

    "I'm not familiar with that," Kay said in response to claims that the sun was in existence even before the morning ActiveBuddy launched, with venture funding from Reuters and Wit Soundview.

  24. In related news... on Paging Eliza: Patenting IM Bots · · Score: 2
    I am patenting a form of expression using three musical 'chords'. This will allow the user to express feelings of sadness and dismay. The trademarked and copyrighted name of this product is, "The Blues"(TM)®©.

    I will defend my original idea in the courts, and I've got a woking prototype to prove I am the inventor.

  25. Re:Mr. Shermer is cutting science off at the knees on [Why] Smart People Believe Weird Things · · Score: 2
    Just a thought - perhaps you are 'sensing' the radar from the police, and ESP is not involved at all. Of course, being able to recieve and understand radio waves would be neat in itself.

    I've oft wondered what the effects of all these man-made radio waves bouncing around have on the human population and enviroment. Perhaps a mutant gene will someday allow us to communicate though this method.

    Or I could be a smart person believing in crazy ideas.... ;)