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User: Secret+Chimp

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  1. Always saving... on 'Star Trek: Enterprise' Cancelled? · · Score: 0

    I don't understand why almost every single sci-fi franchise has some kind of "save me" organization behind it when it's about to get killed off, no matter how bad it is.

  2. Fake like yo momma's ass on Whippersnappers Bad-Mouth Old Games · · Score: 0

    I can't believe people think these things are fake. Try thinking back to elementary school and all of the hilarious shit that the funny kids said; kids act differently when it's just them and older people. They're actually a lot smarter than they seem singularly when they're with other kids, because they generally restrict themselves when around older people (unless they're either those incredible destined-for-glory-at-age-10 kids gifted with everything, or assholes). Hell, I could go to my local elementary school and do a similar interview, and I'd bet that the kids say funny shit.

  3. Re:Lovely. on Using GPS to Track Teens · · Score: 0

    The phone only needs to be on in order for it to work; "on" doesn't necessarily mean "being actively used".

  4. Whoops, you made me do it? on Using GPS to Track Teens · · Score: 0

    This will just encourage more bad behavior; generally, when something is obstructed, it becomes more appealing. You hadn't sped previously; but now if you do, your parents are spying on you and can find out, it becomes more of a drive to get around that obstacle because it'd be "beating the parents". Kind of like unintentional reverse psychology.

  5. Name change? Eh? on Laptops May Be Hazardous to Your Fertility · · Score: 0

    "Laptop" is a perfectly good name and shouldn't be changed. However, if these things were originally called "sacktops", then we'd definitely want a name change to shift behavior.

  6. Excess? on Air Force Researching Antimatter Weapons · · Score: 0

    When the hell are you going to need to destroy that much shit at once? When the land of Japan itself turns into a giant robot and threatens South Korea with its horrid bio-geo-robo-powers?

  7. Re:Obligatory Simpsons reference on Dogs Sniff Out Bladder Cancer From Urine · · Score: 0

    What the hell, a score of 5 for lines he didn't even come up with? I'll have to remember to post a big passage from "A Brief History of Time" and get myself a big 5, Informative score.

  8. sourcing on Does Google Censor Chinese News? · · Score: 0

    It could also be that China's own firewall has been configured to do some creative redirecting instead of direct blocks. Then again I know jack shizzle about that whole affair. Banana hammock.

  9. Whozit on Whois Record Falsification Closer To Illegality · · Score: 0

    I've got to wonder if politicians have any idea what these tech bills are actually talking about.

  10. eh? on The File Sharing Report · · Score: 0

    I can't think of a whole lot of things you'd go and buy after already getting them from P2P. Maybe as a token gesture or something, but practically, what's the point after you already have it? Yes, I see the flaws in that argument and it's not entirely my position. Chew on it anyways =P

  11. Re:I wish I knew earlier on "Scotty" Gets Walk of Fame Star · · Score: 0

    Studying from others mistakes. If it isn't their fault, I'll just have to convert my Shakira Robo-Booty-Bride over to Britney OS.

  12. I wish I knew earlier on "Scotty" Gets Walk of Fame Star · · Score: 1

    I had no idea Doohan was in such poor health. Evidently I'm supposed to care about who Britney un-married instead (which I sort of do, I need to keep my options open)

  13. Weee on The Internet At 35 · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    First post not about the bad title! weee!

  14. The darker areas of plastic surgery on Grow Your Own Replacement Bones · · Score: 1

    We may now have the advent of "real" breast enhancement, so remember that in a few years from now, no, those are NOT shoulder pads.

  15. Bah, I say! or write, rather on A Flying Leap for Cars? · · Score: 1

    Popular Science also said "JET POWERED FLYING AUTOMOBILES BY 1963!!!!" or some crap like that. I don't want flying cars. People are big enough morons in 2 dimensons. Yes, people could make bodies for their cars so it looks like a giant Superman or Megazord or penis (or uterus) is flying around, but come on...

  16. Aren't bullies dumb? on Classroom Bullies On The Internet · · Score: 2, Funny

    Imagine those conversations between him and your nerdy child... "hey nerd, im guna beat u up" "You mean tomorrow?" "no i mena now punk im beatin up u" "We're on the internet, I don't know what you mean" "im puchin ur face rit now u faget"

  17. Should've just done it like that "nicotina" movie on How 8 Pixels Cost Microsoft Millions · · Score: 3, Funny

    Qué género es usted? El Man, La Woman, o Los Unspecifieds?

  18. Re:Different points of realism on On Training, Recruitment Uses For Army Games · · Score: 1

    That really wasn't close to my point at all, but interesting nonetheless.

  19. Different points of realism on On Training, Recruitment Uses For Army Games · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Naturally, for the recruitment part of it, they really only care if the interesting parts are represented well. If somebody designed a completely realistic game representation of the Vietnam war, people who played through it wouldn't want to go into the army at all. Shoot, kill, reload from last savepoint if you die.

  20. Let's shoot people instead on It's Just the 'internet' Now? · · Score: 1

    How about we introduce a shotgun to the next doofus that uses the phrase "information superhighway"? Nah, bad idea... we'd run out of politicians way too fast.

  21. A novel use? on Todd Need[ed] a Liver · · Score: 1

    That's an amusing phrase.... "Liver transplants? On the INTERNET! (monocle falls out of eye) What a perfectly novel idea!"

  22. Well, it isn't ALL terrible on BSA Asks Kids to Name Copyright Weasel · · Score: 1

    Sure isn't as much as an embarassment as those Olympic mascots that look like walking condoms with a really bad case of gout.

  23. Re:As lame as it sounds... on NASA To Get 10,240 Node Itanium 2 Linux Cluster · · Score: 1

    Perhaps including an ASCII picture of Homer would have gotten the joke across better.

  24. Re:As lame as it sounds... on NASA To Get 10,240 Node Itanium 2 Linux Cluster · · Score: 1

    Nerrrrrrd!

  25. Why do they need this? on NASA To Get 10,240 Node Itanium 2 Linux Cluster · · Score: 1

    Do they need a supercomputing cluster to figure out where foam is going to fall off next? Or perhaps to compute down to the millimeter exactly how much crap they'll be in if something goes wrong again...