After reading that Wikipedia article, and the one linked to about.com: "it tastes nice", I can just see some posh restaurant in London serving up "gourmet" soil, giving it a really stupid and pretentious name, and — wait for it! — charging the Earth for the privilege.
Ever tried reading a Microsoft EULA? My God, it's heavy going. I normally think, "sod it, I don't use this nonsense anyway", but as per Internet slang, here's an attempt at translating the one for OEM XP.
The introduction:
IMPORTANT-READ CAREFULLY: This End-User
License Agreement ("EULA") is a legal agreement between you
(either an individual or a single legal entity) and the
manufacturer ("Manufacturer") of the computer system...
and so-forth, meaning:
We pwnd j00! You think you bought this $H1+? Shut up & do as we say suxxor!11! Dont fuk with us lol
Leading on to:
1. GRANT OF LICENSE. Manufacturer grants you the following
rights, provided you comply with all of the terms and
conditions of this EULA:
* Installation and Use. Except as otherwise expressly
provided in this EULA, you may install, use...
or, rather:
Right, one copy, right, on this computer. No more than 5 at a time in here. Make sure you got a code 2 activate this or well cum+get u!!!! Oh yeh dont tamperz wit the drm sh1t, s0ny gets p1553d and then we all suffer lol!
Next:
2. DESCRIPTION OF OTHER RIGHTS AND
LIMITATIONS.
* NetMeeting/Remote Assistance Features. The
SOFTWARE contains Remote Assistance, and
NetMeeting technologies that enable the Product or
applications installed on the COMPUTER...
[An] AOL [user] says:
1. Share nice, d00dz! 2. We get info on you and ur system, but we dont tell noone. 3. Same again lol! 4. No blingual (sic) stuff! 5. Windows media bitz: l00k but dont tuch, fuxxor! 6. Dont split r $h1t. 7. do wot we say or well terminate ur rights!
You can tell why I'm not being very throrough here, but I think it gets the gist across.
3. UPGRADES. If the SOFTWARE is labeled as an upgrade, you
must be properly licensed to use a product identified by
MS or Microsoft Corporation...
or:
if we said its an upgrade we mean UP-grade. Dont try to install it on nothing, you must have sumthing TO UPgrade.
Now...
4. INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY RIGHTS. All title
and intellectual property rights in and to the SOFTWARE
(including but not limited to any images, photographs,
animations, video, audio, music, text...
Something got lost in the translation of this one, but it ended with
are belong to us.
Ahem!
lol
That's more like it.
5. PRODUCT SUPPORT. SOFTWARE support for the
SOFTWARE is not provided by MS, Microsoft Corporation, or
their affiliates or subsidiaries. For product support...
meaning
if it fuxxors up, nothing 2 do with us guvnor!
I could go on here, but I'm thoroughly bored. The rest is export restrictions ("dont give this 2 iranians or cubanz lollll") and so-forth. I think this could work out: Google language filter "EULA to AOLspeak", perhaps?
The AMD is good. The Intel is evil. The Intel shoots Dells, and makes new heat, and poisons the earth with a plague of IT 'consultants', as once it was. But the AMD shoots death, and purifies the Earth of the filth of bank switching. Go forth... and kill!
I'm not a leet professional full time company watcher with mounds of statistics to analyze...
The day the adjective "leet" can be applied to a professional company watcher is the day I'll leave the plane... no, actually you're right: it doesn't make much difference.
It is a bit ironic that the same companies that don't want you to see their movies for free will use software that can be obtained for free to make their movies.
Furthermore, as Windows is (for better or worse) the most widely-deployed operating system, why doesn't it make a better job of educating users about security? (That is, why does it pester me when the AV or update is out of date, or the firewall is off, but doesn't remind me of the destructive potential of doing ordinary stuff as Administrator?)
Yes, I remember Attachments. Humourless, drug-sodden nonsense. Never met a "geek" who was a dope-arsed, trendy drip like the ones in that series. Those I know are quite confident (at least, amongst other geeks). They should've sent ESR into that office — he'd've soon sorted them out.
First Doctor Who and now this... the Jason King re-runs on ITV4 are the only thing worth watching these days.
Heck, I *own* a DVD of Zardoz. That movie fricken rocks.
Yes, saw it the other day. Looks stunning. Acting's good as well. I really don't get why it's maligned so. I understood it perfectly (maybe because I have seen a fair quantity of science fiction); it's no weirder than some Star Trek episodes or some others of its sci-fi contemporaries.
Does this mean we're all going to turn into Mel Gibson and Tina Turner lookalikes?
God bless antipodean post-apocalyptic sci-fi: Mad Max, The Quiet Earth, Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior, Mad Max: Beyond the Thunderdome, The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert...
That looks like some disassembly is required to clean dust from the heatsink and fan. Even my notebook only needs one panel removed and I can blow it out; I do wish designers would pay more attention to this. Dust settles — even in Macs.
Slashdot Mirror
After reading that Wikipedia article, and the one linked to about.com: "it tastes nice", I can just see some posh restaurant in London serving up "gourmet" soil, giving it a really stupid and pretentious name, and — wait for it! — charging the Earth for the privilege.
No-one's gonna be able to hack into my old Amstrad, ha-ha-ha! Stick that in your pipe and smoke it, you OpenBSD pretenders!
Ever tried reading a Microsoft EULA? My God, it's heavy going. I normally think, "sod it, I don't use this nonsense anyway", but as per Internet slang, here's an attempt at translating the one for OEM XP.
The introduction:
and so-forth, meaning:
Leading on to:
or, rather:
Next:
[An] AOL [user] says:
You can tell why I'm not being very throrough here, but I think it gets the gist across.
or:
Now...
Something got lost in the translation of this one, but it ended with
Ahem!
That's more like it.
meaning
I could go on here, but I'm thoroughly bored. The rest is export restrictions ("dont give this 2 iranians or cubanz lollll") and so-forth. I think this could work out: Google language filter "EULA to AOLspeak", perhaps?
Steve Jobs just wants to have himself frozen. I guess it's the only way to cheat Gates of the last laugh.
(And before the humourless OCD-blighted flametards point it out, yes, I do appreciate it's an urban legend.)
So where would the "Intel Inside" stickers be placed?
Queue another rhapsody in blue:
A problem has been detected and Windows has been shut down to prevent damage to your computer...Technical information:
STOP: 0x00000009 (0x8061D594,0x00000002,0x00000000,0x805BFD2B) ALCOHOL_NOT_LESS_OR_EQUAL
The day the adjective "leet" can be applied to a professional company watcher is the day I'll leave the plane... no, actually you're right: it doesn't make much difference.
Could we yet see an SGI revival?!
Nothing to do with sex?!
I don't care what anyone says, that is so not in the Bible!
No, and it's not like "Republican strip-joint" is exactly a contradiction in terms, either.
Furthermore, as Windows is (for better or worse) the most widely-deployed operating system, why doesn't it make a better job of educating users about security? (That is, why does it pester me when the AV or update is out of date, or the firewall is off, but doesn't remind me of the destructive potential of doing ordinary stuff as Administrator?)
You get better at crapflooding.
What was that saying... "Over-paid, over-sexed, and over here"? ;)
Yes, I remember Attachments. Humourless, drug-sodden nonsense. Never met a "geek" who was a dope-arsed, trendy drip like the ones in that series. Those I know are quite confident (at least, amongst other geeks). They should've sent ESR into that office — he'd've soon sorted them out.
First Doctor Who and now this... the Jason King re-runs on ITV4 are the only thing worth watching these days.
Any chance of getting a Brit a summer placement, then? :))
Yes, saw it the other day. Looks stunning. Acting's good as well. I really don't get why it's maligned so. I understood it perfectly (maybe because I have seen a fair quantity of science fiction); it's no weirder than some Star Trek episodes or some others of its sci-fi contemporaries.
Yes, you do.
Old "Audi" TT does have fantastic legs.
Speak for yourself, sir!
Does this mean we're all going to turn into Mel Gibson and Tina Turner lookalikes?
God bless antipodean post-apocalyptic sci-fi: Mad Max, The Quiet Earth, Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior, Mad Max: Beyond the Thunderdome, The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert...
That looks like some disassembly is required to clean dust from the heatsink and fan. Even my notebook only needs one panel removed and I can blow it out; I do wish designers would pay more attention to this. Dust settles — even in Macs.
I do. If you've got a Linux box that's always on and hardware that supports it, there's no excuse for not having WPA Enterprise with EAP-TLS.
Yep. Just like OpenBSD!
But isn't black the same colour as white?
God damn it, nothing makes any God-damned sense anymore!
And how the hell did we get from Symantec to theology anyway?!