This is only partly a joke IMO. The poster has mentioned that he doesn't quite have the experience for the current job. If he takes a shift at a fast-food place or something simple (and they're willing to hire him even though he's overqualified), it will give him plenty of time to apply towards finding a good new job.
Unfortunately, people make it look like Bush is the only doublespeaker. Truman was the one who renamed the Department of War to the Department of Defense.
So I follow NSA/NIST/CIS/CERT/MS guidelines and proceedures for installing a Windows server that I intend to expose to the Internet. I install, patch, configure, etc. This takes hours of actual effort.
Okay, your Windows server comes with IIS, FTP server, file sharing, domain controller, etc., etc. Not to mention Internet Explorer. And if it's not a true "server", you've also got Windows Media Player and a whole bunch of other stuff.
For OpenBSD I install it and plug it in. If there are any relevant errata I may patch it. This takes wall time, but about 5 minutes effort time.
Are you counting your patches for Apache, and Perl or PHP or whatever other CGI, and so forth? Are those considered part of OpenBSD?
By the way, part of the reason OpenBSD is more secure is that when there's a patch they can patch it. Microsoft has no way to update the versions of its CDs in stores daily. If OpenBSD were sold as the release version from three years ago, it wouldn't be as secure as it is now.
The joke is well and good, but there is a reason. DRM is to RMS as, say, http is to httpd. That's why it's "services". DRM is still there, it's just running as a unified lower-level process. (They could have called it DRMS, but that sounds like the plural of DRM.)
No, because then religion would have no need to worship the positive deity (e.g., God) instead of the negative deity (e.g., Satan). In order to say that God is good and the devil is bad, there must be an external reference point for good and bad.
2gt; Guilt and fear in the populace create a need to criminalize and/or tax vice
I would say you only need to criminalize or tax something if people aren't already deterred. If religion were doing such a good job of keeping people moral, why are there laws?
Your point about religion creating vice to criticize activities it doesn't like reminds me of Nietzche's point about religion criticizing human love - which has been eloquently answered in that encyclical from yesterday. See sections 3 and 4.
3gt; Criminalized vice gives rise to organized crime and makes criminals of ordinary people
How are these two related? If vice is artificial and organized crime is just a group of people who are smart enough to ignore laws. I don't think you're trying to equate "ordinary people" and "organized crime".
4> Legitimite business buys off legislators
Legitimate? How is that legitimate?
5> Organized crime buys off judges and prosecutors
Sorry, there actually isn't a conspiracy by crime and business to control half the government each.
6< Law enforcement gets more tax money to handle the growing criminal populace
Why? They're being payed off by someone else, right?
7< The offering plate at church gets more donations from laymen assuaging their guilt
Actually, even churchgoers are rational (like you kinda are) and can realize that if the church is trying to guilt you into paying, then the church doesn't have a good reason. This isn't the Dark Ages with its indulgences. Have you ever watched a church ask for money? Every church I've seen makes its case based on the church's need for money to do good works.
8> Everybody profits but the average Joe, who gets completely screwed
Why isn't he part of one of the other groups - at the least, legitimate business?
If you teach and your school requires a specific application for grades.
That reminded me of my friend with a Linux machine who spend quite some time explaining to his English professor why his document wasn't in Times New Roman -- because he didn't have Times New Roman.
Why should they bother selling more when the stock shows no sign of slowing its growth? If I were a Google CEO, I'd sell just enough to pay for my house and food and let the rest of it grow.
I think the fact that they've sold over a couple million worth of stock is enough of a red flag in itself.
I obviously don't know the background but when a guy makes an incidiary movie about the MPAA, makes specific requests of the MPAA, and pays attention to whether or not his instructions were followed it seems to be like he is trying to get a law suit.
That's entrapment, of course.
Entrapment is only illegal when it's done by the police.
What part of this is funny? This is how countries work. This is how countries have always worked. For example, it's no coincidence that the last years of the US Great Depression were shortly before it entered World War II; we needed raw materials, they needed arms, so we set up a similar trade.
Just because it's oil, jets, and hegemony instead of iron, cotton, and slaves doesn't make a difference.
If you know some programming already (even BASIC will suffice), then you can pick up PHP. If you know C++, even better. If you don't know programming, step away from the PHP and go learn something that won't let people hack your websites (and even if you don't get hacked, will allow your website to keep running in the meanwhile).
If you don't know HTML...uh...make sure you're comfortable with it before starting, because it's almost impossible to make a useful webpage if you can program everything but can't output it.
Save this as a.php file and run it on your server:
There you go, you can see the syntax of PHP now. If you want to use databases, make sure you know SQL first (e.g., "SELECT first_name, last_name FROM customers WHERE age<18"), and then you can use the following commands for MySQL: mysql_connect, mysql_query, mysql_result. For the manual, see php.net. If you're not using MySQL, the commands are similar for other database versions.
"A court has convicted a man of trying to assassinate U.S. President George W. Bush and the leader of Georgia by throwing a grenade at them during a rally in May 2005....The grenade, which was wrapped in a cloth, apparently malfunctioned, investigators said."
Support everything from Lynx and Mosaic up. Someone with Lynx should be able to get some useful information out of your site.
"Support" only IE 5+ and Firefox 1+. Anything older has different rendering engines that will probably work but that you are not responsible for. There are no modern personal computers that can't run one of those two, and about 90% of computers already have at least one of those two, so if something breaks you can validly say "switch to one of those two".
On the other hand, if you care about getting more people visiting your website (as opposed to, say, online filing for the IRS, which is going to get all the tax returns anyway, web or not), there's no business advantage in telling a single person "Sorry, we don't support OmniWeb or iCab." Put your content in HTML 1 or 2 that every browser can read. Make it exciting by using features that the two aforementioned browsers support well. If the features are supported by other browsers, great! If the features break other browsers that aren't compliant, it's their fault. If the features simply aren't supported, you don't lose giving them any information.
Here's the website I maintain, and the plantext version. Note that all the information is still readable. The JavaScript spam armor has a noscript explaining what hasn't been done, for example.
Yet even the most mild criticism of Apple or MacOS on/. will result in my comments being moderated down as Flamebait, Troll and Overrated.
I've been thinking about this..and I think it's that there's a single moderation system. There should be two: one which controls post visibility, and one which controls karma (and karma bonus). That way it's easier to M2 a censor as opposed to a moderator, and people like GP don't lose posting privileges for unpopular but not trollish comments. If it costs a mod point to either hide a post or to hurt his karma, fanboy moderators are more likely to use the former - as are vandal trolls, but enough mods will find it at -1 already to hurt their karma. (And of course for good posts you can always use both, but it costs 2 mod points.)
You: "OK, there should be a bunch of random text at the top, with the letters A through F and the numbers 0 through 9. Ignore that part; we're looking for the first line below all the random text that has actual words in it. Read me that line."
That's my problem. If you show me a Windows 9x series bluescreen, or a Windows NT series bluescreen, or an illegal operation dialog, or a Windows XP friendly error dialog, or a Linux kernel panic, or whatever, I can look at it in half a second and tell you what the problem is. But how am I supposed to remember over the phone that the hex dump is at the top and the error's below it? I thought the hex dump was at the bottom, and the error was to the right of the hex error code (which isn't quite a "bunch"); am I wrong? I can do stuff in Control Panel in person in half a second, but over the phone I probably won't even remember how to launch Control Panel. It's too much subconscious training of where to click and too little conscious knowledge of each menu.
Oh wow. I just realized...you could do a lot of cool things with that. How about a reproduction of all the major written works in civilization, e.g., from Epic of Gilgamesh and the Vedas through the Bible through the Divine Comedy through Paradise Lost to the Lord of the Rings and other modern texts? Print them in their entirety, in standard font, in order from the oldest at the surface to the most recent at the top. It would be impressively symbolic.
Yeah, because you have absolutely no chance of avoiding having your brains blown out by the police immediately afterwards. And if it's your 12-gauge that you're bringing with you, chances are you'll get stopped on the way. Even if you discount the fact that a perfectly informtion-free society creates an incidental police state, I probably won't let you in my house. Or if you force your way in I know what you're up to and I'll kill you first.
If you extend "information" to cover thoughts, there is no way you can plan to kill me and have it succeed.
It is due to the control of information. You're trying to avoid people knowing that you're actually going to kill me until at least a couple of minutes after you do the dirty deed, so you can escape.
(By the way, I'm not an "information-wants-to-be-personified" fanatic. I'm describing a utopia, in both senses of the word, for the sake of argument. This world can never be transitioned into this state, just like massless particles can travel at the speed of light but massive particles can never reach that speed.)
You can have my social security and bank account numbers. Feel free to do with them what you like.
And since information wants to be free, tell me what you've done with them. And not just me - tell the police when you've been doing illegal things under my identity. Tell the credit agencies that you've been using my account, when they want to lower my rating. And tell me your social security and bank account numbers too, while you're at it.
Identity theft is only possible when the information about the identity of the victim is known - but the information about the attacker, or even the information that there is an attacker, remains unknown. If there were a world in which information were perfectly free and freely available, it would be juster than the one we have now.
And before you say "But I don't want people watching my private life or stalking me," what if you grew up in such a world? If someone's watching you, you can know that instantly. If someone stalks and attacks you, the police know that instantly, have incontrovertible proof, and can find the attacker's current location.
I would venture to say that all faults in our society come from the control of information, and if any good comes from hiding information, it is at the core only in preventing others from controlling that information.
Slashdot Mirror
That also has the terrible side effect of making the MPAA God.
This is only partly a joke IMO. The poster has mentioned that he doesn't quite have the experience for the current job. If he takes a shift at a fast-food place or something simple (and they're willing to hire him even though he's overqualified), it will give him plenty of time to apply towards finding a good new job.
Unfortunately, people make it look like Bush is the only doublespeaker. Truman was the one who renamed the Department of War to the Department of Defense.
So I follow NSA/NIST/CIS/CERT/MS guidelines and proceedures for installing a Windows server that I intend to expose to the Internet. I install, patch, configure, etc. This takes hours of actual effort.
Okay, your Windows server comes with IIS, FTP server, file sharing, domain controller, etc., etc. Not to mention Internet Explorer. And if it's not a true "server", you've also got Windows Media Player and a whole bunch of other stuff.
For OpenBSD I install it and plug it in. If there are any relevant errata I may patch it. This takes wall time, but about 5 minutes effort time.
Are you counting your patches for Apache, and Perl or PHP or whatever other CGI, and so forth? Are those considered part of OpenBSD?
By the way, part of the reason OpenBSD is more secure is that when there's a patch they can patch it. Microsoft has no way to update the versions of its CDs in stores daily. If OpenBSD were sold as the release version from three years ago, it wouldn't be as secure as it is now.
The joke is well and good, but there is a reason. DRM is to RMS as, say, http is to httpd. That's why it's "services". DRM is still there, it's just running as a unified lower-level process. (They could have called it DRMS, but that sounds like the plural of DRM.)
1> Religion creates the concept of vice
No, because then religion would have no need to worship the positive deity (e.g., God) instead of the negative deity (e.g., Satan). In order to say that God is good and the devil is bad, there must be an external reference point for good and bad.
2gt; Guilt and fear in the populace create a need to criminalize and/or tax vice
I would say you only need to criminalize or tax something if people aren't already deterred. If religion were doing such a good job of keeping people moral, why are there laws?
Your point about religion creating vice to criticize activities it doesn't like reminds me of Nietzche's point about religion criticizing human love - which has been eloquently answered in that encyclical from yesterday. See sections 3 and 4.
3gt; Criminalized vice gives rise to organized crime and makes criminals of ordinary people
How are these two related? If vice is artificial and organized crime is just a group of people who are smart enough to ignore laws. I don't think you're trying to equate "ordinary people" and "organized crime".
4> Legitimite business buys off legislators
Legitimate? How is that legitimate?
5> Organized crime buys off judges and prosecutors
Sorry, there actually isn't a conspiracy by crime and business to control half the government each.
6< Law enforcement gets more tax money to handle the growing criminal populace
Why? They're being payed off by someone else, right?
7< The offering plate at church gets more donations from laymen assuaging their guilt
Actually, even churchgoers are rational (like you kinda are) and can realize that if the church is trying to guilt you into paying, then the church doesn't have a good reason. This isn't the Dark Ages with its indulgences. Have you ever watched a church ask for money? Every church I've seen makes its case based on the church's need for money to do good works.
8> Everybody profits but the average Joe, who gets completely screwed
Why isn't he part of one of the other groups - at the least, legitimate business?
If you teach and your school requires a specific application for grades.
That reminded me of my friend with a Linux machine who spend quite some time explaining to his English professor why his document wasn't in Times New Roman -- because he didn't have Times New Roman.
Why should they bother selling more when the stock shows no sign of slowing its growth? If I were a Google CEO, I'd sell just enough to pay for my house and food and let the rest of it grow.
I think the fact that they've sold over a couple million worth of stock is enough of a red flag in itself.
It is a red flag. It shows that Google stock is way overvalued. But we knew that already.
I obviously don't know the background but when a guy makes an incidiary movie about the MPAA, makes specific requests of the MPAA, and pays attention to whether or not his instructions were followed it seems to be like he is trying to get a law suit.
That's entrapment, of course.
Entrapment is only illegal when it's done by the police.
What part of this is funny? This is how countries work. This is how countries have always worked. For example, it's no coincidence that the last years of the US Great Depression were shortly before it entered World War II; we needed raw materials, they needed arms, so we set up a similar trade.
Just because it's oil, jets, and hegemony instead of iron, cotton, and slaves doesn't make a difference.
Chuck Norris doesn't plagiarize. He roundhouse kicks the content to himself, and then licenses it under a Creative Chuck license.
Of course, no living person has ever plagiarized from Chuck Norris.
If you know some programming already (even BASIC will suffice), then you can pick up PHP. If you know C++, even better. If you don't know programming, step away from the PHP and go learn something that won't let people hack your websites (and even if you don't get hacked, will allow your website to keep running in the meanwhile).
If you don't know HTML...uh...make sure you're comfortable with it before starting, because it's almost impossible to make a useful webpage if you can program everything but can't output it.
Save this as a
While fair use rights are not specifically in the Constitution
Oh yes they are. Amendments 9 and 10. I haven't seen a better embodiment of "fair use rights".
Nope, close isn't good enough for hand-grenades. They kinda have to go off to be useful.
"A court has convicted a man of trying to assassinate U.S. President George W. Bush and the leader of Georgia by throwing a grenade at them during a rally in May 2005....The grenade, which was wrapped in a cloth, apparently malfunctioned, investigators said."
Support everything from Lynx and Mosaic up. Someone with Lynx should be able to get some useful information out of your site.
"Support" only IE 5+ and Firefox 1+. Anything older has different rendering engines that will probably work but that you are not responsible for. There are no modern personal computers that can't run one of those two, and about 90% of computers already have at least one of those two, so if something breaks you can validly say "switch to one of those two".
On the other hand, if you care about getting more people visiting your website (as opposed to, say, online filing for the IRS, which is going to get all the tax returns anyway, web or not), there's no business advantage in telling a single person "Sorry, we don't support OmniWeb or iCab." Put your content in HTML 1 or 2 that every browser can read. Make it exciting by using features that the two aforementioned browsers support well. If the features are supported by other browsers, great! If the features break other browsers that aren't compliant, it's their fault. If the features simply aren't supported, you don't lose giving them any information.
Here's the website I maintain, and the plantext version. Note that all the information is still readable. The JavaScript spam armor has a noscript explaining what hasn't been done, for example.
Yet even the most mild criticism of Apple or MacOS on /. will result in my comments being moderated down as Flamebait, Troll and Overrated.
I've been thinking about this..and I think it's that there's a single moderation system. There should be two: one which controls post visibility, and one which controls karma (and karma bonus). That way it's easier to M2 a censor as opposed to a moderator, and people like GP don't lose posting privileges for unpopular but not trollish comments. If it costs a mod point to either hide a post or to hurt his karma, fanboy moderators are more likely to use the former - as are vandal trolls, but enough mods will find it at -1 already to hurt their karma. (And of course for good posts you can always use both, but it costs 2 mod points.)
You: "OK, there should be a bunch of random text at the top, with the letters A through F and the numbers 0 through 9. Ignore that part; we're looking for the first line below all the random text that has actual words in it. Read me that line."
That's my problem. If you show me a Windows 9x series bluescreen, or a Windows NT series bluescreen, or an illegal operation dialog, or a Windows XP friendly error dialog, or a Linux kernel panic, or whatever, I can look at it in half a second and tell you what the problem is. But how am I supposed to remember over the phone that the hex dump is at the top and the error's below it? I thought the hex dump was at the bottom, and the error was to the right of the hex error code (which isn't quite a "bunch"); am I wrong? I can do stuff in Control Panel in person in half a second, but over the phone I probably won't even remember how to launch Control Panel. It's too much subconscious training of where to click and too little conscious knowledge of each menu.
Oh wow. I just realized...you could do a lot of cool things with that. How about a reproduction of all the major written works in civilization, e.g., from Epic of Gilgamesh and the Vedas through the Bible through the Divine Comedy through Paradise Lost to the Lord of the Rings and other modern texts? Print them in their entirety, in standard font, in order from the oldest at the surface to the most recent at the top. It would be impressively symbolic.
Yeah, because you have absolutely no chance of avoiding having your brains blown out by the police immediately afterwards. And if it's your 12-gauge that you're bringing with you, chances are you'll get stopped on the way. Even if you discount the fact that a perfectly informtion-free society creates an incidental police state, I probably won't let you in my house. Or if you force your way in I know what you're up to and I'll kill you first.
If you extend "information" to cover thoughts, there is no way you can plan to kill me and have it succeed.
It is due to the control of information. You're trying to avoid people knowing that you're actually going to kill me until at least a couple of minutes after you do the dirty deed, so you can escape.
(By the way, I'm not an "information-wants-to-be-personified" fanatic. I'm describing a utopia, in both senses of the word, for the sake of argument. This world can never be transitioned into this state, just like massless particles can travel at the speed of light but massive particles can never reach that speed.)
(Why can't we use anymore ?)
<sup>. <yo>. <dawg>.
You can have my social security and bank account numbers. Feel free to do with them what you like.
And since information wants to be free, tell me what you've done with them. And not just me - tell the police when you've been doing illegal things under my identity. Tell the credit agencies that you've been using my account, when they want to lower my rating. And tell me your social security and bank account numbers too, while you're at it.
Identity theft is only possible when the information about the identity of the victim is known - but the information about the attacker, or even the information that there is an attacker, remains unknown. If there were a world in which information were perfectly free and freely available, it would be juster than the one we have now.
And before you say "But I don't want people watching my private life or stalking me," what if you grew up in such a world? If someone's watching you, you can know that instantly. If someone stalks and attacks you, the police know that instantly, have incontrovertible proof, and can find the attacker's current location.
I would venture to say that all faults in our society come from the control of information, and if any good comes from hiding information, it is at the core only in preventing others from controlling that information.
Don't be a statistic!
Good investment - there's no way it can lose value!
i could probably patent my ass if i tried to
Isn't that hat patent prior art?