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User: Joebert

Joebert's activity in the archive.

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Comments · 2,326

  1. They can only take soo much on Youtube Video Prompts FBI Probe of LAPD · · Score: 0, Troll
    Suspect repeatedly yells "I can't breathe ! I can't breathe"

    Yeah, I tend to have a hard time breathing when I'm yelling & struggling with the police too.

    Come on, I think cops are a pain in the ass as much as the next guy, but they don't just beat you for no reason.
    What did the guy do to get himself into that position ?
    I'm willing to bet it wasn't jaywalking.
  2. Re:What's wrong with his post? on New Zealand To Allow 'Text-Speak' On Exams · · Score: 1
    Proper spelling and grammar are unnatural constructs which were foisted upon the world by upper class tits who needed another way to make themselves feel special.

    pwer 2 da ppl kll y t

    I fixed it for everyone else.
  3. Precrack on U.S. Government Prepares For Vista · · Score: 1
    Figure 1 shows how volume contents are encrypted with a Full Volume Encryption Key (FVEK)

    If you smooth out the V & tighten Es' middle bar up to it's riser you can predict the things they haven't even said yet.
  4. Forget the robots on Robot Identifies Human Flesh As Bacon · · Score: 1

    Where the hell did theese people get human flesh ?

  5. Of course ! on Unplugging Your Backups · · Score: 1
    while microwave and WiMax can be used to transmit data securely over miles

    Got that right, nobody will ever see the data I transmited in the microwave, not even me.
  6. ASLR on Windows Chief Suggests Vista Won't Need Antivirus · · Score: 1

    A
    Sorry
    Last
    Resort

  7. Barny Google on Blind Mice See Again After Cell Transplants · · Score: 2, Funny

    What if somthing goes wrong & the cells become cancerous ?
    Would someone have to walk around looking like this ?

  8. Re:Return on Investment? on Dell Customer Gets Windows Refund · · Score: 1
    If you had 1% of your yearly income stolen by mugging every year (Say, $350 if you make 35k), would that be ok?

    Sure why not ?
    I can always take a page out the the Music Industry handbook & tell my insurance company it was $500.
  9. Re:Mass extinction? on Space Telescope Catches Monster Flare · · Score: 1

    It's just the people that realize why we have the others do it that it's funny to.

  10. Re:Good Luck on The Hacker Profiling Project · · Score: 1

    D. Find the boses ex-girlfriend before she calms down.

  11. Goody-goody on The Hacker Profiling Project · · Score: 1

    Dear Stefania, I have followed with enthusiasm the course of your disgrace and public shaming. My own never bothered me except for the inconvenience of being incarcerated, but you may lack perspective. In our discussions down in the chatroom it was apparent to me that your father, the dead night watchman, figures largely in your value system. I think your success in putting an end to Jame Gumb's career as a couturier pleased you most because you could imagine your father being pleased. But now, alas, you're in bad odour with the HPP. Do you imagine your daddy being shamed by your disgrace? Do you see him in his plain pine box crushed by your failure; a sorry, petty end of a promising career? What is worst about this humiliation Stefania? Is it how your failure will reflect on your mommy and daddy? Is your worst fear that people will now and forever believe they were indeed just good old trailer camp tornado bait white trash and that perhaps you are too? By the way I couldn't help noticing on the HPP's rather dull public website that I have been hoisted from the Project's archives of the common hacker and elevated to the more prestigious 1010 Most Wanted list. Is this coincidence, or are you back on the case? If so, goody goody, cause I need to come out of retirement and return to public life. I imagine you sitting in a dark basement room bent over papers and computer screens. Is that accurate? Please tell me truly, Special Agent Ducci. Regards, your old pal mr.joebert, MD2020 P.S. Clearly this new assignment is not your choice rather I suppose it is a part of the bargain but you accepted it Stefania. Your job is to craft my doom. So I am not sure how well I should wish you but I'm sure we'll have a lot of fun. Tata, J.

  12. Re:A lot more is necessary... on AIDS Can Fight AIDS · · Score: 1
    Yes, I'm joking. And yes, I know I'm going straight to hell for that one.

    With AIDS & a never ending clip full of blanks.
  13. Re:wtf? on Computer Date Glitch May Limit Next Shuttle Launch · · Score: 1
    Bug free except for the rollover to a new year...

    Why can't the programmers at T-Mobile leave bugs like that ?
  14. Re:God Forbid... on OpenSourcing Yourself, Are You Ready? · · Score: 1
    All it takes is $5 for a four-month subscription.

    Crackheads charge $10 a pop to find out stuff like that, & 90% of the time it's not even true.
  15. Full of pranksters on OpenSourcing Yourself, Are You Ready? · · Score: 1

    Looks like the fun started without me.
    http://openhuman.org/ben_d_meova

  16. Re:Dwat and double dwat... on U.S. Publishes Guide To Building Atom Bombs To Web · · Score: 1

    Hey while you're there, can you grab me the things on this list from the Chemistry Lab ?

  17. Make up your mind-crosoft on Microsoft Will Allow Vista Reinstalls · · Score: 1

    I think the fine folks at Microsoft have spent a little too much time around all thoose lithium computer pieces.

  18. Re:Ethics you say ? on Microsoft Considers Pulling Out of China · · Score: 1
    Aerobestiality?

    I was thinking more along the lines of bangin a chunky intern on the company jet during a business trip on my wedding anniversary, but whatever flies your aeroplane I guess.

    Hell, the only way my wife would ever find out is if she answered a question with "when pigs fly".
  19. Re:Ethics you say ? on Microsoft Considers Pulling Out of China · · Score: 1
    Ethics
    aerial pork
    Mile High club

    That's 3 lines I never want to see together again as long as I live.
  20. For your years of great service on CEO Nabbed for Identity Theft From Own Employees · · Score: 1

    I wonder how many employees were supposed to get an extra large bonus this Christmas.

  21. They obviously know somthing about it on Viral Fossil Brought Back To Life · · Score: 1

    Can someone explain to me why that, if they knew enough about it to ensure it could replicate only once, they needed to revive it to learn anything more about it ?

  22. Re:Too Complicated on Lego Christmas Production Shortage · · Score: 1

    Why do you think I started playing with Legos ?

  23. Re:Wonder woman born from a polygraph, wow! on FBI File of Lie Detector's Creator · · Score: 1
    Strange that the FBI now relies so heavily on polygraph's when their initial assessment of the device was so negative

    I do the same thing to people at swap meets.
  24. Too Complicated on Lego Christmas Production Shortage · · Score: 1

    I remember when I lost my intrest in Legos, it was right about the time when they started making the special pieces, the "Cherry On Top" pieces I like to call them.

    It took all the fun out of it, it's like they were mocking my own imagination & force feeding me theirs.

    I always knew thoose special pieces were bad news, thoose pieces require molds that are just too complicated.
    I think Lego needs to get back to producing the toys that sparked imagination, not advertised someone elses.

  25. Re:Which is it? on Speculation on Google / YouTube "Hardball" · · Score: 1
    Does YouGoog or GooGoog sound better to Yoogle?

    How about Goob ?