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Review of the Cybiko Xtreme

Posted by michael on from the alternative-class-experiences dept.

Levendis23 writes: "We've just posted our latest review: the Cybiko Xtreme. Pretty slick little gadget, with RF networking and ability to set up bluetooth-like clouds so that other units can talk to each other, play games, or swap files. You can can even use another unit at as a repeater to bounce your message to another unit out of your range."

87 comments

  1. metal gear by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    the la-le-lu-le-lo

    1. Re:metal gear by Fucky+the+troll · · Score: -1
      Thank you, pasta necklace.


      THE OFFICIAL TACO-SNOTTING FAQ [slashdot.org]
      By The WIPO Troll [slashdot.org], $Revision: 1.11 $

      Why have I been receiving emails from CmdrTaco, in which he seems to be speaking in some kind of code language?

      Whenever Rob "CmdrTaco" Malda [cmdrtaco.net] gets bored (and who wouldn't, running a site like Slashdot all day), he roams through the Slashdot database, penis in hand, looking for people who might enjoy engaging in homosexual orgies with him. How he determines this is anyone's guess; but if you have a homosexual-sounding nickname, or a nick with the letter P in it, you're in trouble.
      So this time, he found you. Lucky you.
      CmdrTaco's code language is relatively easy to decipher. He prefers to speak in thinly-veiled sexual innuendo to evade the watchful (but relatively stupid) eye of Slashdot's parent corporation, VA Software [yahoo.com]. CmdrTaco's "Commander" is, of course, his penis -- a small, withered little thing that lives in his pants that only comes out in the presence of other men or at the beck and call of CmdrTaco's own right hand. His "Taco bells" are the shriveled testes that droop beneath his Commander, and his "Taco sauce" is his, well, jizz. It should be more than obvious to you now what he means when he asks you to "ring his Taco bells" or "taste his gourmet Taco sauce."
      Lastly, there is a practice he refers to as "Taco-snotting" and the more shocking "circle-snot."

      Good Lord. What is "Taco-snotting?"

      "Taco-snotting" is the term used by CmdrTaco to refer to the practice of sucking the penis of a homosexual man (or unwilling heterosexual; CmdrTaco is rumored to prefer rape), then blowing the semen out his nose onto his partner's (victim's) face and body. A long, bubbly stream of milky-white semen is left on CmdrTaco's face [yahoo.com], dribbling out of his nose and down his cheek: hence the term, "Taco-snotting."
      A "circle-snot" is a Taco-snotting circle-jerk, another practice common among the Slashdot crew. CmdrTaco, CowboiKneel [yahoo.com], and Homos get together and Taco-snot each other with their gooey, sticky cum -- spooging their jizz-snot all over each other's faces and pasty, white bodies, until they're covered head to toe with each other's man juice. This can go on for hours. For the homosexual penetration that follows this lengthy foreplay, Roblowme is usually there to provide plenty of anal lubricant; he owns a limo service and has ample supplies of motor oil and axle grease ready to go.
      To complete this perverted orgy, fellow geeks Michael, Timothy, and Jamie will usually join in, dressed in tight leather mock-S.S. uniforms, jack boots, and leather gloves. The whole group then proceeds to snot each other's spunk and whip each other's pudgy asses with riding crops and chains until their pale, white geek bodies are exhausted and soaked in stinking sweat from the hours of passionate, homosexual revelry.

      Ewwwwww. So, can I stop receiving these emails?

      Hopefully.
      You most likely forgot to uncheck the "Willing to Taco-snot" checkbox in your account preferences. CmdrTaco has probably already got the hots for your wad, and he's probably already been lurking outside your bathroom window for weeks with a camera, some tissues and lube. There's no escaping a geek in heat, so it's probably too late for you, but you can possibly rectify this situation. To remove yourself from CmdrTaco's sights, log into your Slashdot account, go to your user page, click on Messages, and uncheck the box next to "Willing to Taco-snot." Maybe he'll ignore you. Probably not.

      I can't stop receiving these emails from CmdrTaco!?

      If you indulge him in a Taco-snot or two, he might leave you alone. You might also want to look into mail filtering, restraining orders, or purchasing a heavy, blunt object capable of warding off rampaging homosexual geeks in heat. Trust me, when they charge... oh, the humanity. If he gets you, and you let him Taco-snot you, you will most likely end up tied up in his basement to be used as his sex slave for the rest of your life (or until he accidentally drowns you in spunk in a circle-snot).

      Have you ever been Taco-Snotted?

      Unfortunately, yes. I first met CmdrTaco at an Open Source Convention [yahoo.com]. He invited me back to his room for a game of Quake and some "gourmet Tacos," but when I got there, he jumped me and tied me to his bed, stripping me. After taking his "Commander" out of his pants, Mr. Taco made me suck the withered thing six times. He then performed his vile Taco-snotting ritual on me three times over the next two hours, bringing me to orgasm after sweaty, mind-numbing orgasm... then he snotted my own milky-white jizz back onto my face, into my mouth, then again on my exposed belly.
      CmdrTaco invited several of his Open Source (or rather, "Open Sauce" -- man sauce) buddies over to continue the twisted snotfest. Linux Torvalds raped my ass [yahoo.com] with his "monolithic kernel [yahoo.com]," and Anal Cox used his "network stack" in a multitude of unspeakable ways on and in every orifice in my defenseless body. Michael was there in his leather Nazi uniform, caning my ass with a bamboo pole and ranting about "all those Censorware freaks out to get him."
      How did you finally escape, you ask? After about 16 hours of countless homosexual atrocities perpetrated against my restrained body, they all finally went to sleep on top of me, sweat-soaked and exhausted. I was left there, covered in bubbly, translucent jizz-snot, chained to the bed, with half a dozen fat, pasty-white fags lying around and on top of me. Fortunately the spooge coating my flesh worked wonderfully as a lubricant; I was able to squirm my way out of the handcuffs and slip out the back door. I'm just glad I survived the ordeal. These geeks had a lot of built-up spunk in their wads -- I could've easily been drowned!

      That's horrible. Does "Taco-snotting" have anything to do with CmdrTaco's "special taco"?

      No, that's a different disgusting perversion CmdrTaco indulges himself in. CmdrTaco is usually not satisfied with merely snotting your own jizz back onto your face, he most often enjoys involving his own bodily fluids in his twisted games. WeatherTroll [slashdot.org] has spent some time trying to educate the Slashdot readership about this vile practice (emphasis added):
      You may be wondering what CmdrTaco's "special taco" is. You will be wishing that you hadn't been wondering after you finish reading this post. To make his "special taco", CmdrTaco takes a taco shell and shits on it. He then adds lettuce, jacks off on the taco, and adds a compound to make the person who eats the taco unconscious. Of course, the compound does not make the person unconscious until the taco is fully eaten. Thus CmdrTaco force-feeds the taco to the unsuspecting victim.
      After the victim is unconscious, he is held against his will and used for CmdrTaco's nefarious sexual purposes. This includes shoving taco shells up the victim's ass, Taco-snotting, and getting Jon Katz involved.
      Completely different, yet no less revolting. It should be clear to you now that CmdrTaco is a very, very sick individual, as are most of the Slashdot editors.

      Does Jon Katz get involved in any of this? I thought he was a paedophile, not a homosexual.

      Actually, Jon Katz is a homosexual paedophile. He's also a coprophiliac, and, many suspect, a zoophile. Jon Katz is somewhat of a loner and doesn't involve himself in circle-snots. Mr. Katz usually engages in a game called " Katz juicy-douching [yahoo.com]" with his harem of little-boy slaves: a vile practice which involves administering an enema to himself of the little boy's urine (forced out of them with a pair of pliers), spooging the vile muck from his ass back into the enema bag, then squirting and slathering the goo all over himself, and the little boy's chained-up and naked bodies. If he's in the mood, he will sometimes skip refilling the enema bag and just squirt it from his ass [yahoo.com] onto his boys. Unwilling boys are further tortured with the pliers until they comply and allow Mr. Katz to juicy-douche them for the rest of their lives.
      As I already said, Mr. Katz is also a zoophile. As if the sexual escapades with the helpless little boys aren't enough, Jon usually enjoys his juicy-douches best when his penis is firmly planted in a female goat's anus [yahoo.com]. He is also rumoured to get off on watching his little boys eat the goat's small, bean-like turds.
      --






      Roadkill is yummy.
  2. Early post by AdmlTroll · · Score: -1

    Early post gets the Goat! Or should that be be the worm?

    --
    I'm a pepper. Wouldn't you like to be a pepper too?
  3. What's with Wil Wheaton? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic
    Wil Wheaton is a fucking poseur. I can't stand how you fucktards get all drippy and excited every time that his name is mentioned. Ever since that stupid fucking Slashdot interview, all of you twerps have been ready to suck his dick. Don't you understand? It's all a sham! Your little hearts fluttered when he chose the EFF as his sponser on The Weakest Link, but the kid runs fucking Windows 2000. I mean, come on! Rob Malda had to run an anti-Microsoft "news" website for two years before anyone would believe that he only used Windows "for games," and you fall for Wil Wheaton's schtick immediately, without question? That's proof that the only intelligent posters left on Slashdot are us trolls.

    He was a bad actor, and now he's a wannabe geek. The fact that he was a minor celebrity five years ago is immaterial. Maybe the new Linux mascot should be Alf! We should have Tony Danza on the new GNOME committee!

    Wil Wheaton is such a moron that someone guessed his Slashdot account password and started crapflooding with it within a week. It's a newbie UID, by the way: Wil hadn't even heard of Slashdot until the interview!

    It's almost fitting, though: both Linux and Wil Wheaton are immature hacks unsuited for work in the Real World. Both are yesterday's news. Both are pointless. Hey, maybe Wil does have a place on Slashdot!

    -- The_Messenger

  4. Slashdot Advertising by The+Gardener · · Score: 0, Insightful

    The article is one big freakin' advertisment for this stuff. Is slashdot gearing up for Christmas, or what?

    The Gardener

    --
    --
    1. Re:Slashdot Advertising by Proteus+Child · · Score: 0
      Is slashdot gearing up for Christmas, or what?

      Where else are we going to find gift ideas for each other? You can only give so many gift certificates for Borders and B&N before the idea of buying your own gift gets old... this sort of thing makes it easier to shop for friends.

      --

      Proteus' Child

      Doko ni datte; hito wa, tsunagette iru.

  5. Snot me baby, one more time! by The+WIPO+Troll · · Score: -1

    THE OFFICIAL TACO-SNOTTING FAQ
    By The WIPO Troll, $Revision: 1.11 $

    Why have I been receiving emails from CmdrTaco, in which he seems to be speaking in some kind of code language?

    Whenever Rob "CmdrTaco" Malda gets bored (and who wouldn't, running a site like Slashdot all day), he roams through the Slashdot database, penis in hand, looking for people who might enjoy engaging in homosexual orgies with him. How he determines this is anyone's guess; but if you have a homosexual-sounding nickname, or a nick with the letter P in it, you're in trouble.
    So this time, he found you. Lucky you.
    CmdrTaco's code language is relatively easy to decipher. He prefers to speak in thinly-veiled sexual innuendo to evade the watchful (but relatively stupid) eye of Slashdot's parent corporation, VA Software. CmdrTaco's "Commander" is, of course, his penis -- a small, withered little thing that lives in his pants that only comes out in the presence of other men or at the beck and call of CmdrTaco's own right hand. His "Taco bells" are the shriveled testes that droop beneath his Commander, and his "Taco sauce" is his, well, jizz. It should be more than obvious to you now what he means when he asks you to "ring his Taco bells" or "taste his gourmet Taco sauce."
    Lastly, there is a practice he refers to as "Taco-snotting" and the more shocking "circle-snot."

    Good Lord. What is "Taco-snotting?"

    "Taco-snotting" is the term used by CmdrTaco to refer to the practice of sucking the penis of a homosexual man (or unwilling heterosexual; CmdrTaco is rumored to prefer rape), then blowing the semen out his nose onto his partner's (victim's) face and body. A long, bubbly stream of milky-white semen is left on CmdrTaco's face, dribbling out of his nose and down his cheek: hence the term, "Taco-snotting."
    A "circle-snot" is a Taco-snotting circle-jerk, another practice common among the Slashdot crew. CmdrTaco, CowboiKneel, and Homos get together and Taco-snot each other with their gooey, sticky cum -- spooging their jizz-snot all over each other's faces and pasty, white bodies, until they're covered head to toe with each other's man juice. This can go on for hours. For the homosexual penetration that follows this lengthy foreplay, Roblowme is usually there to provide plenty of anal lubricant; he owns a limo service and has ample supplies of motor oil and axle grease ready to go.
    To complete this perverted orgy, fellow geeks Michael, Timothy, and Jamie will usually join in, dressed in tight leather mock-S.S. uniforms, jack boots, and leather gloves. The whole group then proceeds to snot each other's spunk and whip each other's pudgy asses with riding crops and chains until their pale, white geek bodies are exhausted and soaked in stinking sweat from the hours of passionate, homosexual revelry.

    Ewwwwww. So, can I stop receiving these emails?

    Hopefully.
    You most likely forgot to uncheck the "Willing to Taco-snot" checkbox in your account preferences. CmdrTaco has probably already got the hots for your wad, and he's probably already been lurking outside your bathroom window for weeks with a camera, some tissues and lube. There's no escaping a geek in heat, so it's probably too late for you, but you can possibly rectify this situation. To remove yourself from CmdrTaco's sights, log into your Slashdot account, go to your user page, click on Messages, and uncheck the box next to "Willing to Taco-snot." Maybe he'll ignore you. Probably not.

    I can't stop receiving these emails from CmdrTaco!?

    If you indulge him in a Taco-snot or two, he might leave you alone. You might also want to look into mail filtering, restraining orders, or purchasing a heavy, blunt object capable of warding off rampaging homosexual geeks in heat. Trust me, when they charge... oh, the humanity. If he gets you, and you let him Taco-snot you, you will most likely end up tied up in his basement to be used as his sex slave for the rest of your life (or until he accidentally drowns you in spunk in a circle-snot).

    Have you ever been Taco-Snotted?

    Unfortunately, yes. I first met CmdrTaco at an Open Source Convention. He invited me back to his room for a game of Quake and some "gourmet Tacos," but when I got there, he jumped me and tied me to his bed, stripping me. After taking his "Commander" out of his pants, Mr. Taco made me suck the withered thing six times. He then performed his vile Taco-snotting ritual on me three times over the next two hours, bringing me to orgasm after sweaty, mind-numbing orgasm... then he snotted my own milky-white jizz back onto my face, into my mouth, then again on my exposed belly.
    CmdrTaco invited several of his Open Source (or rather, "Open Sauce" -- man sauce) buddies over to continue the twisted snotfest. Linux Torvalds raped my ass with his "monolithic kernel," and Anal Cox used his "network stack" in a multitude of unspeakable ways on and in every orifice in my defenseless body. Michael was there in his leather Nazi uniform, caning my ass with a bamboo pole and ranting about "all those Censorware freaks out to get him."
    How did you finally escape, you ask? After about 16 hours of countless homosexual atrocities perpetrated against my restrained body, they all finally went to sleep on top of me, sweat-soaked and exhausted. I was left there, covered in bubbly, translucent jizz-snot, chained to the bed, with half a dozen fat, pasty-white fags lying around and on top of me. Fortunately the spooge coating my flesh worked wonderfully as a lubricant; I was able to squirm my way out of the handcuffs and slip out the back door. I'm just glad I survived the ordeal. These geeks had a lot of built-up spunk in their wads -- I could've easily been drowned!

    That's horrible. Does "Taco-snotting" have anything to do with CmdrTaco's "special taco"?

    No, that's a different disgusting perversion CmdrTaco indulges himself in. CmdrTaco is usually not satisfied with merely snotting your own jizz back onto your face, he most often enjoys involving his own bodily fluids in his twisted games. WeatherTroll has spent some time trying to educate the Slashdot readership about this vile practice (emphasis added):
    You may be wondering what CmdrTaco's "special taco" is. You will be wishing that you hadn't been wondering after you finish reading this post. To make his "special taco", CmdrTaco takes a taco shell and shits on it. He then adds lettuce, jacks off on the taco, and adds a compound to make the person who eats the taco unconscious. Of course, the compound does not make the person unconscious until the taco is fully eaten. Thus CmdrTaco force-feeds the taco to the unsuspecting victim.
    After the victim is unconscious, he is held against his will and used for CmdrTaco's nefarious sexual purposes. This includes shoving taco shells up the victim's ass, Taco-snotting, and getting Jon Katz involved.
    Completely different, yet no less revolting. It should be clear to you now that CmdrTaco is a very, very sick individual, as are most of the Slashdot editors.

    Does Jon Katz get involved in any of this? I thought he was a paedophile, not a homosexual.

    Actually, Jon Katz is a homosexual paedophile. He's also a coprophiliac, and, many suspect, a zoophile. Jon Katz is somewhat of a loner and doesn't involve himself in circle-snots. Mr. Katz usually engages in a game called " Katz juicy-douching" with his harem of little-boy slaves: a vile practice which involves administering an enema to himself of the little boy's urine (forced out of them with a pair of pliers), spooging the vile muck from his ass back into the enema bag, then squirting and slathering the goo all over himself, and the little boy's chained-up and naked bodies. If he's in the mood, he will sometimes skip refilling the enema bag and just squirt it from his ass onto his boys. Unwilling boys are further tortured with the pliers until they comply and allow Mr. Katz to juicy-douche them for the rest of their lives.
    As I already said, Mr. Katz is also a zoophile. As if the sexual escapades with the helpless little boys aren't enough, Jon usually enjoys his juicy-douches best when his penis is firmly planted in a female goat's anus. He is also rumoured to get off on watching his little boys eat the goat's small, bean-like turds.

    ...Are you getting hard writing this?

    Why, yes. :) Join me in a WIPO-snot?

    No, thanks. I'm already CmdrTaco's boi toi.

    ________________________________________
    READER COMMENTS

    1. Re:The Taco-Snotting FAQ Rides Again!! (Updated so (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.25 9:14 (#2609574)

      try to find a pic of actual "taco-snotting"! fucking funny it would be! so go to gay porn sites day in and day out until you find a man giving another man a blowjob that has jizz coming out of his nose and mouth. by the way, keep up the good work

    2. Re:Snotting another first!! (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.23 12:18 (#2603370)

      WIPO, this is getting waaaay old, either drop it or revise it.... there've been no updates for days now...

      CmdrTaco

    3. Re:It's Taco SPAM!!! (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.22 17:28 (#2600815)

      A truly excellent and very humourous troll indeed!
      However...

      To complete this perverted orgy, fellow geeks Michael, Timothy, and Jamie often join in, dressed in black Gestapo uniforms, jack boots, and leather gloves.

      Black GeStaPo uniforms? The GeStaPo (Geheime Staatspolizei - Secret State Police) wore civilian clothes (although there are reports on them occasionally using Allgemeine SS uniforms in occupied territories).

      I seriously doubt that perverted individuals like CmdrTaco et al would have the good taste to ever wear the outstandingly beautiful black Waffen SS uniforms! Please update the FAQ accordingly.

      • Re:It's Taco SPAM!!! (Score:0)
        by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.23 4:06 (#2602610)

        Actually, it appears you are both wrong!! Ah ha!! I think our boy WIPO was thinking of the Allgemeine SS uniforms. Waffen SS were grey.

    4. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.21 4:49 (#2594325)

      oh yeah, you say you have masturbated only 2 times to this post. well, by the time it takes for me to get through reading it, i usually end up masturbated 5 to 6 times, 10 to 12 if i have the goatse.cx homepage loaded up and am looking at it side by side with the slashdot page. my keyboard, hands, mouse, monitor, the underside of my desk and around the floor under my desk are cum soaked and sticky with the man smell i know and love.

    5. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.21 4:41 (#2594311)

      for version 2 you should make a total re-write of the cod...errr...text and add some details about cmdrtaco and the homo-gang's happenings with their coworkers (osdn?) and all of the gay revelry they enjoy and promote. by the way, did i just see cmdrtaco on television promoting the nax hair removal system? i guess after using vaseline in and around his ass he grew quite a ponytail and it had to be removed somehow...ouch!

    6. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:-1, Troll)
      by TRoLLaXoR on 2001.11.21 3:59 (#2594191)

      WIPO, do you notice how few comments you get for anything you write/post/spam nowadays?

      -Trollaxor

    7. Jon-Katz docking (Score:-1)
      by sales_worldwide on 2001.11.20 11:53 (#2588488)

      You forgot to mention Jon Katz's "docking" games, where he places his chopper head to head with another chap, and rolls the other guys foreskin over his own circumcised end ("docking"), providing him with fantasies of actually having his own forskin ...
      "Making linux GPL was the best thing I ever did" - Torvalds. I'd hate to see the worst thing...

    8. Re:Snotting a first! (Score:-1)
      by Fucky the troll on 2001.11.20 11:28 (#2588446)

      Woah! When did the WIPO troll get freed? And how the fuck did I miss it?

      Excellent FP, sir.

      This is a sig virus. Please put me in your sig

    9. Re:Snotting a first! (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.20 11:04 (#2588407)

      omg that is crapflooding material if i ever saw it!!!!!! and u got a first post!!!! whoot to the wipo troll!!!

    10. GW, please.... (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.19 9:03 (#2583756)

      GW...you know we love every hair on your 27 acre ass... and I, for one, would never do anything untowards your graceful demeanor. And you probably have several friends that would love to help you do the bear dance all over my face if I so much as spelled your name wrong. And you know I'd defend your Constitutional right to defame God in heaven. I'd even help fund your education, should you ever decide to take that route. Hell, I'd buy you a tall tepid bear-whiz beer if you were here with me, right now!

      But. ...if you can't find another topic, I'm gonna step over your dead mother's grave and kick your assuredly anesthetitized butt clear across the playground.

      Now go stick your shaved head back down inside the woman's toilet, and just to show there's no hard feelings, I'll jump in the tow-truck and drive right over to help you pull it right out...ok?

      thanks

    11. Re:Help me Taco-Snotters!! (Score:-1)
      by mark knopfler 69 on 2001.11.19 8:25 (#2583695)

      I DO NOT BELIEVE YOU SIR. FOR ONE THING, THE E-MAIL FROM CMDRTACO DOES NOT HAVE ENOUGH GRAMMATICAL AND SPELLING MISTAKES. Let's be realistic here, CmdrTaco usually types with one hand, and since he is shaking from jacking off his aim on the keyboard isn't too good. Those e-mails were a little too well written. Sorry boy, you'll have to do better.

    12. Re: What the hell is "taco snotting"? (Score:-1)
      by WeatherTroll on 2001.11.19 8:14 (#2583667)

      You should update this to say VA Software instead of VA Linux.

    13. YOU ARE WINNER (Score:1)
      by smackmonkey on 2001.11.19 7:06 (#2583510)

      Crackhead moderators: this is +5, Hilarious material.

      --
      CNN declares War on Islam!
      Left-wing America declares War on its Civil Liberties!

    14. Re:On Taco-Snotting 1.9 (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.19 5:40 (#2583336)

      This was funny the first 100 times. Now it is getting boring!

    15. Digusting and Shameful (Score:-1)
      by egg troll on 2001.11.18 22:27 (#2582054)

      Having masturbated *twice* to this post, I'm still incredibly aroused! Come over for a Taco Snot. I'll be wearing my crotchless Clifford the Big Red Dog outfit!!

      For more info check out this /. article

    16. IMPROVE THE FAQ (Score:-1, Flamebait)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.18 12:03 (#2580822)

      add more links to goatse and to cowboineal's site to make it better. a link to rotten.com would be nice too

      • Re:IMPROVE THE FAQ (Score:0)
        by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.18 12:18 (#2580832)

        and a link to michael's site and to jon katz's site if he has one and homo's site. i dont know what else to say. maybe a few links to phallic.org they have nice penis pictures! a link to the planet quake site or whatever. really make the reader feel this faq really answers their questions. oh yeah, and when you talk about cmdrtaco snotting you, say he brought you to "orgasm after sweaty orgasm". describe it more is all i'm saying. and use more italics and bolding! and when you talk about jon katz shitting or whatever have a link to fecal japan on rotten.com

        other wise a great job wipo troll! keep up the good work!

    17. Re:CmdrTaco's filthy secret! (Score:-1)
      by Wil Wheaton on 2001.11.18 6:41 (#2580438)

      Hi. Let's be buddies.. butt buddies.
      --
      WIL WHEATON DOT NET

    18. WIPO speaks the truth (Score:-1)
      by dead_puppy on 2001.11.18 5:33 (#2580342)

      Here is an e-mail I received a week ago:

      From: malda@slashdot.org
      To: puppy_dead@hotmail.com
      Subject: were where you last friday? :(

      I thought we where supposed to meet at Backdoor's at 8-ish, sugar-lips? You could've at least told me that you could'nt make it! I was even in my favorite pink skirt for you, honey-cup... next time, you could be more considarite and tell me you cant come... bastard.

      --
      CmdrTaco (malda@slashdot.org)
      You finding Ling-Ling's head?

    19. Taco snotting is WRONG!!! (Score:-1)
      by Big_Ass_Spork on 2001.11.18 4:53 (#2580300)

      I do it wrong

      Laying here in the shadows of my room, I squint up at my love. My Ms. Portman. I am sore and tired after fucking her for eight solid hours. My chapped and aching dick is soaking in grits to relieve the pain. She gets on her knees and starts lapping the grits up out of the bowl. She places her beautiful hands on my penis and starts to lick the grits off my achy piece.

      Massaging my nutsack she....

      WAIT, I DO IT WRONG!!!!

      Yanking my dick out of her mouth I throw her to the ground and shove it in to her gaping freshly fisted ass. [goatse.cx]

      "OH BIG ASS SPORK!! Fuck my ass, fuck my ass good. DEEPER, my stallion, deeper!! Make a Beowulf cluster of sperm on my back!!"

      "Imagine a Beowulf cluster of this baby!"

      I DO IT WRONG!!!!

      ---
      All your Sporks are belong to Big_Ass_Spork! What you say?! All your Sporks are belo... forget it...

    20. Rob Malda Dead at age 25! (Score:-1)
      by j0nkatz on 2001.11.17 22:54 (#2579596)

      I just heard some sad news on the radio -- famous queerbait Rob Malda was found dead in his Holland home this morning. The details were a bit hazy, but it seems that he drowned in jizz while Taco Snotting his friend Hemos. I'm sure everyone in the /. community will miss him -- even if you didn't enjoy his queer antics and boring ass website, there's no denying his contributions to the homosesual cultural development, particularly in the areas of Taco snotting. Truly an American icon.

      I wanna Open Source sex so it won't be worth a shit either.

    21. TACO-SNOTTING is really Donkey-Punching (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.15 6:38 (#2567601)

      No no no, the correct term for that is "donkey-punch". I have eye-witnessed this amazing eye-popping event demonstrated on unsuspecting hose-monsters by my frat brothers in the past.. . :-)

    22. Re:the effect of knowlege laws... (Score:1)
      by AbsoluteRelativity on 2001.11.15 5:31 (#2567457)

      The WIPO Troll
      Slashdot and the Karma Lottery - News for uber monkeys, by uber monkeys.

    23. Re:Taco-Snotting (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.13 9:27 (#2557632)

      Oh, man that's just sick !

    24. HOW DO I GET AN ANONYMOUS PROXY? (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.13 9:03 (#2557604)

      TELL ME WHERE I CAN GET AN ANONYMOUS proxy please WIPO Troll. Maybe later i will join you in a snotting at my place. ;P

    25. Re:Taco-Snottage!?!?!? (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by vikool on 2001.11.13 7:43 (#2557495)

      what is this bull shit,i feel offened that some people feel so so senseless to post stuff like these esp when such a tragic incident has occured

    26. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1)
      by I.T.R.A.R.K. on 2001.11.11 22:38 (#2551890)

      Where the fuck do I sign up?!

      - I throw rocks at retarded kids

      "Adequacy.org: Where congenital stupidity is not an option, but a requirement."

    27. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 21:53 (#2551753)

      this shit is hilarious..keep up the good work.

    28. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by rockwood on 2001.11.11 21:49 (#2551746)

      OMG! That is the most disgusting thing I have ever heard! WHo in their right mind would sit down and waste the time to construct such a replusive story. I guess I'll be skipping lunch and dinner today.. and possibly tomorrow also. The game doesn't affect reality. Reality affects the game.

    29. Re:Ban this! It's disgusting!! (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 14:43 (#2550701)

      dude, this is crap-flood material if i ever saw it.
      duuuuuuuuudddddddddddddeeeeeeeee.

    30. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Flamebait)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 8:16 (#2550266)

      horny_rob_6969@hotmail.com

      Ah, so that's what the alt.binaries.pictures.erotica.horny-rob newsgroup is about!

    31. MOD THIS UP PLEASE!!! (Score:-1)
      by egg troll on 2001.11.11 5:34 (#2550024)

      +5, Arousing

      For more info check out this /. article

    32. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 4:39 (#2549891)

      WINNER>

    33. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 4:37 (#2549887)

      I love you. Why do you use your bitchslapped account, rather than signing up for a new account to post at +1 before getting bitchslapped by the censors here? I guess I should speak for myself, but I don't want to log out and lose all my slashdot customization properties, nor do I want to lose my 50 karma yet.

    34. Re:On Taco-Snotting (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.09 9:19 (#2542412)

      you fucking rock! right down to the expanded cvs id!

      WIPO trolls > linux

    ________________________________________

    $Id: tacosnotting.html,v 1.11 2001/11/25 15:40:22 wipo Exp $
    --

    J. Wipo Troll, Esq.
    Crapflooder Associates
    Slashdot.org

    1. Re:Snot me baby, one more time! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Get a life you loser! Don't you have anything better to do than insult CmdrTaco and the gay community? We are not perverts, we are human beings just like you. So give it a rest!

  6. CmdrTaco: "Ring my Taco Bells!" **** TROLL TUESDAY by The+WIPO+Troll · · Score: -1


    THE OFFICIAL TACO-SNOTTING FAQ

    By The WIPO Troll, $Revision: 1.11 $





    Why have I been receiving emails from CmdrTaco, in which he seems to be speaking in some kind of code language?



    Whenever Rob "CmdrTaco" Malda gets bored (and who wouldn't, running a site like Slashdot all day), he roams through the Slashdot database, penis in hand, looking for people who might enjoy engaging in homosexual orgies with him. How he determines this is anyone's guess; but if you have a homosexual-sounding nickname, or a nick with the letter P in it, you're in trouble.


    So this time, he found you. Lucky you.


    CmdrTaco's code language is relatively easy to decipher. He prefers to speak in thinly-veiled sexual innuendo to evade the watchful (but relatively stupid) eye of Slashdot's parent corporation, VA Software. CmdrTaco's "Commander" is, of course, his penis -- a small, withered little thing that lives in his pants that only comes out in the presence of other men or at the beck and call of CmdrTaco's own right hand. His "Taco bells" are the shriveled testes that droop beneath his Commander, and his "Taco sauce" is his, well, jizz. It should be more than obvious to you now what he means when he asks you to "ring his Taco bells" or "taste his gourmet Taco sauce."


    Lastly, there is a practice he refers to as "Taco-snotting" and the more shocking "circle-snot."


    Good Lord. What is "Taco-snotting?"



    "Taco-snotting" is the term used by CmdrTaco to refer to the practice of sucking the penis of a homosexual man (or unwilling heterosexual; CmdrTaco is rumored to prefer rape), then blowing the semen out his nose onto his partner's (victim's) face and body. A long, bubbly stream of milky-white semen is left on CmdrTaco's face, dribbling out of his nose and down his cheek: hence the term, "Taco-snotting."


    A "circle-snot" is a Taco-snotting circle-jerk, another practice common among the Slashdot crew. CmdrTaco, CowboiKneel, and Homos get together and Taco-snot each other with their gooey, sticky cum -- spooging their jizz-snot all over each other's faces and pasty, white bodies, until they're covered head to toe with each other's man juice. This can go on for hours. For the homosexual penetration that follows this lengthy foreplay, Roblowme is usually there to provide plenty of anal lubricant; he owns a limo service and has ample supplies of motor oil and axle grease ready to go.


    To complete this perverted orgy, fellow geeks Michael, Timothy, and Jamie will usually join in, dressed in tight leather mock-S.S. uniforms, jack boots, and leather gloves. The whole group then proceeds to snot each other's spunk and whip each other's pudgy asses with riding crops and chains until their pale, white geek bodies are exhausted and soaked in stinking sweat from the hours of passionate, homosexual revelry.


    Ewwwwww. So, can I stop receiving these emails?



    Hopefully.


    You most likely forgot to uncheck the "Willing to Taco-snot" checkbox in your account preferences. CmdrTaco has probably already got the hots for your wad, and he's probably already been lurking outside your bathroom window for weeks with a camera, some tissues and lube. There's no escaping a geek in heat, so it's probably too late for you, but you can possibly rectify this situation. To remove yourself from CmdrTaco's sights, log into your Slashdot account, go to your user page, click on Messages, and uncheck the box next to "Willing to Taco-snot." Maybe he'll ignore you. Probably not.


    I can't stop receiving these emails from CmdrTaco!?



    If you indulge him in a Taco-snot or two, he might leave you alone. You might also want to look into mail filtering, restraining orders, or purchasing a heavy, blunt object capable of warding off rampaging homosexual geeks in heat. Trust me, when they charge... oh, the humanity. If he gets you, and you let him Taco-snot you, you will most likely end up tied up in his basement to be used as his sex slave for the rest of your life (or until he accidentally drowns you in spunk in a circle-snot).


    Have you ever been Taco-Snotted?



    Unfortunately, yes. I first met CmdrTaco at an Open Source Convention. He invited me back to his room for a game of Quake and some "gourmet Tacos," but when I got there, he jumped me and tied me to his bed, stripping me. After taking his "Commander" out of his pants, Mr. Taco made me suck the withered thing six times. He then performed his vile Taco-snotting ritual on me three times over the next two hours, bringing me to orgasm after sweaty, mind-numbing orgasm... then he snotted my own milky-white jizz back onto my face, into my mouth, then again on my exposed belly.


    CmdrTaco invited several of his Open Source (or rather, "Open Sauce" -- man sauce) buddies over to continue the twisted snotfest. Linux Torvalds raped my ass with his "monolithic kernel," and Anal Cox used his "network stack" in a multitude of unspeakable ways on and in every orifice in my defenseless body. Michael was there in his leather Nazi uniform, caning my ass with a bamboo pole and ranting about "all those Censorware freaks out to get him."


    How did you finally escape, you ask? After about 16 hours of countless homosexual atrocities perpetrated against my restrained body, they all finally went to sleep on top of me, sweat-soaked and exhausted. I was left there, covered in bubbly, translucent jizz-snot, chained to the bed, with half a dozen fat, pasty-white fags lying around and on top of me. Fortunately the spooge coating my flesh worked wonderfully as a lubricant; I was able to squirm my way out of the handcuffs and slip out the back door. I'm just glad I survived the ordeal. These geeks had a lot of built-up spunk in their wads -- I could've easily been drowned!


    That's horrible. Does "Taco-snotting" have anything to do with CmdrTaco's "special taco"?



    No, that's a different disgusting perversion CmdrTaco indulges himself in. CmdrTaco is usually not satisfied with merely snotting your own jizz back onto your face, he most often enjoys involving his own bodily fluids in his twisted games. WeatherTroll has spent some time trying to educate the Slashdot readership about this vile practice (emphasis added):

    You may be wondering what CmdrTaco's "special taco" is. You will be wishing that you hadn't been wondering after you finish reading this post. To make his "special taco", CmdrTaco takes a taco shell and shits on it. He then adds lettuce, jacks off on the taco, and adds a compound to make the person who eats the taco unconscious. Of course, the compound does not make the person unconscious until the taco is fully eaten. Thus CmdrTaco force-feeds the taco to the unsuspecting victim.


    After the victim is unconscious, he is held against his will and used for CmdrTaco's nefarious sexual purposes. This includes shoving taco shells up the victim's ass, Taco-snotting, and getting Jon Katz involved.


    Completely different, yet no less revolting. It should be clear to you now that CmdrTaco is a very, very sick individual, as are most of the Slashdot editors.


    Does Jon Katz get involved in any of this? I thought he was a paedophile, not a homosexual.



    Actually, Jon Katz is a homosexual paedophile. He's also a coprophiliac, and, many suspect, a zoophile. Jon Katz is somewhat of a loner and doesn't involve himself in circle-snots. Mr. Katz usually engages in a game called " Katz juicy-douching" with his harem of little-boy slaves: a vile practice which involves administering an enema to himself of the little boy's urine (forced out of them with a pair of pliers), spooging the vile muck from his ass back into the enema bag, then squirting and slathering the goo all over himself, and the little boy's chained-up and naked bodies. If he's in the mood, he will sometimes skip refilling the enema bag and just squirt it from his ass onto his boys. Unwilling boys are further tortured with the pliers until they comply and allow Mr. Katz to juicy-douche them for the rest of their lives.


    As I already said, Mr. Katz is also a zoophile. As if the sexual escapades with the helpless little boys aren't enough, Jon usually enjoys his juicy-douches best when his penis is firmly planted in a female goat's anus. He is also rumoured to get off on watching his little boys eat the goat's small, bean-like turds.


    ...Are you getting hard writing this?



    Why, yes. :) Join me in a WIPO-snot?


    No, thanks. I'm already CmdrTaco's boi toi.




    ________________________________________
    READER COMMENTS



    1. Re:The Taco-Snotting FAQ Rides Again!! (Updated so (Score:0)

      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.25 9:14 (#2609574)

      try to find a pic of actual "taco-snotting"! fucking funny it would be! so go to gay porn sites day in and day out until you find a man giving another man a blowjob that has jizz coming out of his nose and mouth. by the way, keep up the good work



    2. Re:Snotting another first!! (Score:0)

      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.23 12:18 (#2603370)

      WIPO, this is getting waaaay old, either drop it or revise it.... there've been no updates for days now...

      CmdrTaco



    3. Re:It's Taco SPAM!!! (Score:0)

      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.22 17:28 (#2600815)

      A truly excellent and very humourous troll indeed!

      However...

      To complete this perverted orgy, fellow geeks Michael, Timothy, and Jamie often join in, dressed in black Gestapo uniforms, jack boots, and leather gloves.

      Black GeStaPo uniforms? The GeStaPo (Geheime Staatspolizei - Secret State Police) wore civilian clothes (although there are reports on them occasionally using Allgemeine SS uniforms in occupied territories).

      I seriously doubt that perverted individuals like CmdrTaco et al would have the good taste to ever wear the outstandingly beautiful black Waffen SS uniforms! Please update the FAQ accordingly.



      • Re:It's Taco SPAM!!! (Score:0)

        by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.23 4:06 (#2602610)

        Actually, it appears you are both wrong!! Ah ha!! I think our boy WIPO was thinking of the Allgemeine SS uniforms. Waffen SS were grey.



    4. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:-1, Troll)

      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.21 4:49 (#2594325)

      oh yeah, you say you have masturbated only 2 times to this post. well, by the time it takes for me to get through reading it, i usually end up masturbated 5 to 6 times, 10 to 12 if i have the goatse.cx homepage loaded up and am looking at it side by side with the slashdot page. my keyboard, hands, mouse, monitor, the underside of my desk and around the floor under my desk are cum soaked and sticky with the man smell i know and love.



    5. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:0)

      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.21 4:41 (#2594311)

      for version 2 you should make a total re-write of the cod...errr...text and add some details about cmdrtaco and the homo-gang's happenings with their coworkers (osdn?) and all of the gay revelry they enjoy and promote. by the way, did i just see cmdrtaco on television promoting the nax hair removal system? i guess after using vaseline in and around his ass he grew quite a ponytail and it had to be removed somehow...ouch!



    6. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:-1, Troll)

      by TRoLLaXoR on 2001.11.21 3:59 (#2594191)

      WIPO, do you notice how few comments you get for anything you write/post/spam nowadays?

      -Trollaxor



    7. Jon-Katz docking (Score:-1)

      by sales_worldwide on 2001.11.20 11:53 (#2588488)

      You forgot to mention Jon Katz's "docking" games, where he places his chopper head to head with another chap, and rolls the other guys foreskin over his own circumcised end ("docking"), providing him with fantasies of actually having his own forskin ...

      "Making linux GPL was the best thing I ever did" - Torvalds. I'd hate to see the worst thing...



    8. Re:Snotting a first! (Score:-1)

      by Fucky the troll on 2001.11.20 11:28 (#2588446)

      Woah! When did the WIPO troll get freed? And how the fuck did I miss it?

      Excellent FP, sir.

      This is a sig virus. Please put me in your sig



    9. Re:Snotting a first! (Score:-1, Troll)

      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.20 11:04 (#2588407)

      omg that is crapflooding material if i ever saw it!!!!!! and u got a first post!!!! whoot to the wipo troll!!!



    10. GW, please.... (Score:0)

      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.19 9:03 (#2583756)

      GW...you know we love every hair on your 27 acre ass... and I, for one, would never do anything untowards your graceful demeanor. And you probably have several friends that would love to help you do the bear dance all over my face if I so much as spelled your name wrong. And you know I'd defend your Constitutional right to defame God in heaven. I'd even help fund your education, should you ever decide to take that route. Hell, I'd buy you a tall tepid bear-whiz beer if you were here with me, right now!

      But. ...if you can't find another topic, I'm gonna step over your dead mother's grave and kick your assuredly anesthetitized butt clear across the playground.

      Now go stick your shaved head back down inside the woman's toilet, and just to show there's no hard feelings, I'll jump in the tow-truck and drive right over to help you pull it right out...ok?

      thanks



    11. Re:Help me Taco-Snotters!! (Score:-1)

      by mark knopfler 69 on 2001.11.19 8:25 (#2583695)

      I DO NOT BELIEVE YOU SIR. FOR ONE THING, THE E-MAIL FROM CMDRTACO DOES NOT HAVE ENOUGH GRAMMATICAL AND SPELLING MISTAKES. Let's be realistic here, CmdrTaco usually types with one hand, and since he is shaking from jacking off his aim on the keyboard isn't too good. Those e-mails were a little too well written. Sorry boy, you'll have to do better.



    12. Re: What the hell is "taco snotting"? (Score:-1)

      by WeatherTroll on 2001.11.19 8:14 (#2583667)

      You should update this to say VA Software instead of VA Linux.



    13. YOU ARE WINNER (Score:1)

      by smackmonkey on 2001.11.19 7:06 (#2583510)

      Crackhead moderators: this is +5, Hilarious material.

      --

      CNN declares War on Islam!

      Left-wing America declares War on its Civil Liberties!



    14. Re:On Taco-Snotting 1.9 (Score:0)

      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.19 5:40 (#2583336)

      This was funny the first 100 times. Now it is getting boring!



    15. Digusting and Shameful (Score:-1)

      by egg troll on 2001.11.18 22:27 (#2582054)

      Having masturbated *twice* to this post, I'm still incredibly aroused! Come over for a Taco Snot. I'll be wearing my crotchless Clifford the Big Red Dog outfit!!

      For more info check out this /. article



    16. IMPROVE THE FAQ (Score:-1, Flamebait)

      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.18 12:03 (#2580822)

      add more links to goatse and to cowboineal's site to make it better. a link to rotten.com would be nice too



      • Re:IMPROVE THE FAQ (Score:0)

        by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.18 12:18 (#2580832)

        and a link to michael's site and to jon katz's site if he has one and homo's site. i dont know what else to say. maybe a few links to phallic.org they have nice penis pictures! a link to the planet quake site or whatever. really make the reader feel this faq really answers their questions. oh yeah, and when you talk about cmdrtaco snotting you, say he brought you to "orgasm after sweaty orgasm". describe it more is all i'm saying. and use more italics and bolding! and when you talk about jon katz shitting or whatever have a link to fecal japan on rotten.com

        other wise a great job wipo troll! keep up the good work!



    17. Re:CmdrTaco's filthy secret! (Score:-1)

      by Wil Wheaton on 2001.11.18 6:41 (#2580438)

      Hi. Let's be buddies.. butt buddies.

      --

      WIL WHEATON DOT NET



    18. WIPO speaks the truth (Score:-1)

      by dead_puppy on 2001.11.18 5:33 (#2580342)

      Here is an e-mail I received a week ago:


      From: malda@slashdot.org

      To: puppy_dead@hotmail.com

      Subject: were where you last friday? :(

      I thought we where supposed to meet at Backdoor's at 8-ish, sugar-lips? You could've at least told me that you could'nt make it! I was even in my favorite pink skirt for you, honey-cup... next time, you could be more considarite and tell me you cant come... bastard.

      --

      CmdrTaco (malda@slashdot.org)

      You finding Ling-Ling's head?



    19. Taco snotting is WRONG!!! (Score:-1)

      by Big_Ass_Spork on 2001.11.18 4:53 (#2580300)

      I do it wrong

      Laying here in the shadows of my room, I squint up at my love. My Ms. Portman. I am sore and tired after fucking her for eight solid hours. My chapped and aching dick is soaking in grits to relieve the pain. She gets on her knees and starts lapping the grits up out of the bowl. She places her beautiful hands on my penis and starts to lick the grits off my achy piece.

      Massaging my nutsack she....

      WAIT, I DO IT WRONG!!!!

      Yanking my dick out of her mouth I throw her to the ground and shove it in to her gaping freshly fisted ass. [goatse.cx]

      "OH BIG ASS SPORK!! Fuck my ass, fuck my ass good. DEEPER, my stallion, deeper!! Make a Beowulf cluster of sperm on my back!!"

      "Imagine a Beowulf cluster of this baby!"

      I DO IT WRONG!!!!

      ---

      All your Sporks are belong to Big_Ass_Spork! What you say?! All your Sporks are belo... forget it...



    20. Rob Malda Dead at age 25! (Score:-1)

      by j0nkatz on 2001.11.17 22:54 (#2579596)

      I just heard some sad news on the radio -- famous queerbait Rob Malda was found dead in his Holland home this morning. The details were a bit hazy, but it seems that he drowned in jizz while Taco Snotting his friend Hemos. I'm sure everyone in the /. community will miss him -- even if you didn't enjoy his queer antics and boring ass website, there's no denying his contributions to the homosesual cultural development, particularly in the areas of Taco snotting. Truly an American icon.

      I wanna Open Source sex so it won't be worth a shit either.



    21. TACO-SNOTTING is really Donkey-Punching (Score:-1, Troll)

      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.15 6:38 (#2567601)

      No no no, the correct term for that is "donkey-punch". I have eye-witnessed this amazing eye-popping event demonstrated on unsuspecting hose-monsters by my frat brothers in the past.. . :-)



    22. Re:the effect of knowlege laws... (Score:1)

      by AbsoluteRelativity on 2001.11.15 5:31 (#2567457)

      The WIPO Troll

      Slashdot and the Karma Lottery - News for uber monkeys, by uber monkeys.



    23. Re:Taco-Snotting (Score:-1, Troll)

      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.13 9:27 (#2557632)

      Oh, man that's just sick !



    24. HOW DO I GET AN ANONYMOUS PROXY? (Score:-1, Troll)

      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.13 9:03 (#2557604)

      TELL ME WHERE I CAN GET AN ANONYMOUS proxy please WIPO Troll. Maybe later i will join you in a snotting at my place. ;P



    25. Re:Taco-Snottage!?!?!? (Score:-1, Offtopic)

      by vikool on 2001.11.13 7:43 (#2557495)

      what is this bull shit,i feel offened that some people feel so so senseless to post stuff like these esp when such a tragic incident has occured



    26. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1)

      by I.T.R.A.R.K. on 2001.11.11 22:38 (#2551890)

      Where the fuck do I sign up?!

      - I throw rocks at retarded kids

      "Adequacy.org: Where congenital stupidity is not an option, but a requirement."



    27. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1, Troll)

      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 21:53 (#2551753)

      this shit is hilarious..keep up the good work.



    28. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1, Offtopic)

      by rockwood on 2001.11.11 21:49 (#2551746)

      OMG! That is the most disgusting thing I have ever heard! WHo in their right mind would sit down and waste the time to construct such a replusive story. I guess I'll be skipping lunch and dinner today.. and possibly tomorrow also.
      The game doesn't affect reality. Reality affects the game.



    29. Re:Ban this! It's disgusting!! (Score:0)

      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 14:43 (#2550701)

      dude, this is crap-flood material if i ever saw it.

      duuuuuuuuudddddddddddddeeeeeeeee.



    30. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Flamebait)

      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 8:16 (#2550266)

      horny_rob_6969@hotmail.com

      Ah, so that's what the alt.binaries.pictures.erotica.horny-rob newsgroup is about!



    31. MOD THIS UP PLEASE!!! (Score:-1)

      by egg troll on 2001.11.11 5:34 (#2550024)

      +5, Arousing

      For more info check out this /. article



    32. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Offtopic)

      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 4:39 (#2549891)

      WINNER>



    33. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Offtopic)

      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 4:37 (#2549887)

      I love you. Why do you use your bitchslapped account, rather than signing up for a new account to post at +1 before getting bitchslapped by the censors here? I guess I should speak for myself, but I don't want to log out and lose all my slashdot customization properties, nor do I want to lose my 50 karma yet.



    34. Re:On Taco-Snotting (Score:0)

      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.09 9:19 (#2542412)

      you fucking rock! right down to the expanded cvs id!

      WIPO trolls > linux



    ________________________________________



    $Id: tacosnotting.html,v 1.11 2001/11/25 15:40:22 wipo Exp $
    --

    J. Wipo Troll, Esq.
    Crapflooder Associates
    Slashdot.org

  7. Wave of the future? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Interesting

    Just a couple days ago my father related to me how he was telling his students about Fidonet - sending a message across country by having it hop modem'd servers in the good ol' days - and the kids saying "Why not just use the internet?"

    So having these little babies spread across a country could easily lead to a "Cybiko across America", eh? An alternative to the U.S. gov't filtering all our packets? Hmmm...

    1. Re:Wave of the future? by Angry+White+Guy · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Although it would take a week or better to make it. Their little SMS service doesn't have routing capabilities, so the message would bounce around with all the other lost messages.

      And somebody has to say it, so "Imagine a Beowulf Cluster of these...."

      --
      You think that I'm crazy, you should see this guy!
    2. Re:Wave of the future? by deander2 · · Score: 2

      _Your_father_ had to tell you about fidonet?!? Good god man, how old are you? I consider myself a fairly young professional at the ripe old age of 22 here, and I used fidonet for years back when BBS's were all the rage...

      Maybe I'm becoming one of those old fart geeks.
      "Man, _I_ remember when I got my first 286 OCed to 12.5MHz!! It had a 40mB HDD too! It was svveet!!!" ;)

      --
      http://kered.org
    3. Re:Wave of the future? by Proteus+Child · · Score: 0
      Just a couple days ago my father related to me how he was telling his students about Fidonet - sending a message across country by having it hop modem'd servers in the good ol' days - and the kids saying "Why not just use the internet?"

      Yup. I officially feel old now. A generation has grown up without BBSes.

      --

      Proteus' Child

      Doko ni datte; hito wa, tsunagette iru.

    4. Re:Wave of the future? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      The point was he was relating a story of telling his current grade/high school students about Fidonet.

      However I never did use it - or knew of it - myself either. I went straight from stand-alone Atari 400/Apple II(e/c/gs)/Mac SE to networked Unixes at MIT - as much of a tech jump as a cultural jump for me. And really sweet!

      It wasn't until much later that I started using Gopher or other older networking techs. The only thing close to a BBS that I've used was GENie - to play BattleTech.

      Is there a "normal" tech progression?

    5. Re:Wave of the future? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0


      My point was that I feel real old tech-wise sometimes, even tho I don't consider myself real old age-wise.

      Anyway, cheers! ;)

      -- derek

    6. Re:Wave of the future? by jamie · · Score: 1
      "A generation has grown up without BBSes."

      Community-forum websites like Slashdot are their BBSes. Different tech, but then the tech was always evolving anyway.

      Jamie McCarthy
      co-sysop of Thieves' World FIDO :)

    7. Re:Wave of the future? by MadMorf · · Score: 1

      Maybe I'm becoming one of those old fart geeks.

      Sorry, Sonny...I'm a true old fart geek...
      I used to "BBS Surf" on my Atari 800, with 48K of RAM, a 188K Floppy drive and a 300 Baud modem..

      My modem at work was 75 Baud...

      Smokin'!!!

      --
      Goofy, Geeky Gifts and More!
    8. Re:Wave of the future? by Legion303 · · Score: 3, Funny
      An Atari 800? We had to make do with a network of cans and strings. And we *liked* it!

      -Legion

    9. Re:Wave of the future? by GreyPoopon · · Score: 2, Informative
      Sorry, Sonny...I'm a true old fart geek...

      No you aren't. I started my computer experience on a PDP-8 with terminal and accoustically coupled modem. I think you measured the modem speed in seconds per character. A few years later, I graduated to a PDP-11. My first "home" computer was a TI-99/4A with only 16K of RAM, NO floppy drive and NO modem. It used cassette tape for storage. Note that there were many home computers that came out prior that I passed on.

      But even I don't qualify for the true old fart geek. I missed punch cards in college by one year. Learning Fortran on punch card machines would have rounded out my nostalgia-geek experience.

      --

      GreyPoopon
      --
      Why is it I can write insightful comments but can't come up with a clever signature?

    10. Re:Wave of the future? by phil+reed · · Score: 2
      Learning Fortran on punch card machines would have rounded out my nostalgia-geek experience.


      Nah. You haven't been a true old-fart geek unless you've toggled in a bootstrap loader to read a paper tape from a ASR-33 teletype.

      --

      ...phil
      "For a list of the ways which technology has failed to improve our quality of life, press 3."
    11. Re:Wave of the future? by MadMorf · · Score: 1

      Ah, well, if you want to go back that far...

      When I was in the USAF, I DID toggle in diagnostics and loaders on the front panel of my HM-4118...
      Built by Hughes Aircraft Corp...
      128k of ferrite core memory. Input devices included 4 9-track tape drives, a paper-tape reader and a Teletype 321 terminal...
      And output devices were 14 radar consoles and a paper tape punch...

      So, YES, I am an old fart, just not an old UNIX fart... :)

      --
      Goofy, Geeky Gifts and More!
    12. Re:Wave of the future? by rumba · · Score: 1

      Dude, you had a floppy drive? I am so jealous. I'm still using this cassette jobber.

    13. Re:Wave of the future? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      What the hell is a cybiko?

  8. AdmlTroll, meet CmdrTaco's Commander!! by The+WIPO+Troll · · Score: -1



      • *** *** *** TROLL TUESDAY *** *** ***



    THE OFFICIAL TACO-SNOTTING FAQ
    By The WIPO Troll, $Revision: 1.11 $

    Why have I been receiving emails from CmdrTaco, in which he seems to be speaking in some kind of code language?

    Whenever Rob "CmdrTaco" Malda gets bored (and who wouldn't, running a site like Slashdot all day), he roams through the Slashdot database, penis in hand, looking for people who might enjoy engaging in homosexual orgies with him. How he determines this is anyone's guess; but if you have a homosexual-sounding nickname, or a nick with the letter P in it, you're in trouble.
    So this time, he found you. Lucky you.
    CmdrTaco's code language is relatively easy to decipher. He prefers to speak in thinly-veiled sexual innuendo to evade the watchful (but relatively stupid) eye of Slashdot's parent corporation, VA Software. CmdrTaco's "Commander" is, of course, his penis -- a small, withered little thing that lives in his pants that only comes out in the presence of other men or at the beck and call of CmdrTaco's own right hand. His "Taco bells" are the shriveled testes that droop beneath his Commander, and his "Taco sauce" is his, well, jizz. It should be more than obvious to you now what he means when he asks you to "ring his Taco bells" or "taste his gourmet Taco sauce."
    Lastly, there is a practice he refers to as "Taco-snotting" and the more shocking "circle-snot."

    Good Lord. What is "Taco-snotting?"

    "Taco-snotting" is the term used by CmdrTaco to refer to the practice of sucking the penis of a homosexual man (or unwilling heterosexual; CmdrTaco is rumored to prefer rape), then blowing the semen out his nose onto his partner's (victim's) face and body. A long, bubbly stream of milky-white semen is left on CmdrTaco's face, dribbling out of his nose and down his cheek: hence the term, "Taco-snotting."
    A "circle-snot" is a Taco-snotting circle-jerk, another practice common among the Slashdot crew. CmdrTaco, CowboiKneel, and Homos get together and Taco-snot each other with their gooey, sticky cum -- spooging their jizz-snot all over each other's faces and pasty, white bodies, until they're covered head to toe with each other's man juice. This can go on for hours. For the homosexual penetration that follows this lengthy foreplay, Roblowme is usually there to provide plenty of anal lubricant; he owns a limo service and has ample supplies of motor oil and axle grease ready to go.
    To complete this perverted orgy, fellow geeks Michael, Timothy, and Jamie will usually join in, dressed in tight leather mock-S.S. uniforms, jack boots, and leather gloves. The whole group then proceeds to snot each other's spunk and whip each other's pudgy asses with riding crops and chains until their pale, white geek bodies are exhausted and soaked in stinking sweat from the hours of passionate, homosexual revelry.

    Ewwwwww. So, can I stop receiving these emails?

    Hopefully.
    You most likely forgot to uncheck the "Willing to Taco-snot" checkbox in your account preferences. CmdrTaco has probably already got the hots for your wad, and he's probably already been lurking outside your bathroom window for weeks with a camera, some tissues and lube. There's no escaping a geek in heat, so it's probably too late for you, but you can possibly rectify this situation. To remove yourself from CmdrTaco's sights, log into your Slashdot account, go to your user page, click on Messages, and uncheck the box next to "Willing to Taco-snot." Maybe he'll ignore you. Probably not.

    I can't stop receiving these emails from CmdrTaco!?

    If you indulge him in a Taco-snot or two, he might leave you alone. You might also want to look into mail filtering, restraining orders, or purchasing a heavy, blunt object capable of warding off rampaging homosexual geeks in heat. Trust me, when they charge... oh, the humanity. If he gets you, and you let him Taco-snot you, you will most likely end up tied up in his basement to be used as his sex slave for the rest of your life (or until he accidentally drowns you in spunk in a circle-snot).

    Have you ever been Taco-Snotted?

    Unfortunately, yes. I first met CmdrTaco at an Open Source Convention. He invited me back to his room for a game of Quake and some "gourmet Tacos," but when I got there, he jumped me and tied me to his bed, stripping me. After taking his "Commander" out of his pants, Mr. Taco made me suck the withered thing six times. He then performed his vile Taco-snotting ritual on me three times over the next two hours, bringing me to orgasm after sweaty, mind-numbing orgasm... then he snotted my own milky-white jizz back onto my face, into my mouth, then again on my exposed belly.
    CmdrTaco invited several of his Open Source (or rather, "Open Sauce" -- man sauce) buddies over to continue the twisted snotfest. Linux Torvalds raped my ass with his "monolithic kernel," and Anal Cox used his "network stack" in a multitude of unspeakable ways on and in every orifice in my defenseless body. Michael was there in his leather Nazi uniform, caning my ass with a bamboo pole and ranting about "all those Censorware freaks out to get him."
    How did you finally escape, you ask? After about 16 hours of countless homosexual atrocities perpetrated against my restrained body, they all finally went to sleep on top of me, sweat-soaked and exhausted. I was left there, covered in bubbly, translucent jizz-snot, chained to the bed, with half a dozen fat, pasty-white fags lying around and on top of me. Fortunately the spooge coating my flesh worked wonderfully as a lubricant; I was able to squirm my way out of the handcuffs and slip out the back door. I'm just glad I survived the ordeal. These geeks had a lot of built-up spunk in their wads -- I could've easily been drowned!

    That's horrible. Does "Taco-snotting" have anything to do with CmdrTaco's "special taco"?

    No, that's a different disgusting perversion CmdrTaco indulges himself in. CmdrTaco is usually not satisfied with merely snotting your own jizz back onto your face, he most often enjoys involving his own bodily fluids in his twisted games. WeatherTroll has spent some time trying to educate the Slashdot readership about this vile practice (emphasis added):
    You may be wondering what CmdrTaco's "special taco" is. You will be wishing that you hadn't been wondering after you finish reading this post. To make his "special taco", CmdrTaco takes a taco shell and shits on it. He then adds lettuce, jacks off on the taco, and adds a compound to make the person who eats the taco unconscious. Of course, the compound does not make the person unconscious until the taco is fully eaten. Thus CmdrTaco force-feeds the taco to the unsuspecting victim.
    After the victim is unconscious, he is held against his will and used for CmdrTaco's nefarious sexual purposes. This includes shoving taco shells up the victim's ass, Taco-snotting, and getting Jon Katz involved.
    Completely different, yet no less revolting. It should be clear to you now that CmdrTaco is a very, very sick individual, as are most of the Slashdot editors.

    Does Jon Katz get involved in any of this? I thought he was a paedophile, not a homosexual.

    Actually, Jon Katz is a homosexual paedophile. He's also a coprophiliac, and, many suspect, a zoophile. Jon Katz is somewhat of a loner and doesn't involve himself in circle-snots. Mr. Katz usually engages in a game called " Katz juicy-douching" with his harem of little-boy slaves: a vile practice which involves administering an enema to himself of the little boy's urine (forced out of them with a pair of pliers), spooging the vile muck from his ass back into the enema bag, then squirting and slathering the goo all over himself, and the little boy's chained-up and naked bodies. If he's in the mood, he will sometimes skip refilling the enema bag and just squirt it from his ass onto his boys. Unwilling boys are further tortured with the pliers until they comply and allow Mr. Katz to juicy-douche them for the rest of their lives.
    As I already said, Mr. Katz is also a zoophile. As if the sexual escapades with the helpless little boys aren't enough, Jon usually enjoys his juicy-douches best when his penis is firmly planted in a female goat's anus. He is also rumoured to get off on watching his little boys eat the goat's small, bean-like turds.

    ...Are you getting hard writing this?

    Why, yes. :) Join me in a WIPO-snot?

    No, thanks. I'm already CmdrTaco's boi toi.

    ________________________________________
    READER COMMENTS

    1. Re:The Taco-Snotting FAQ Rides Again!! (Updated so (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.25 9:14 (#2609574)

      try to find a pic of actual "taco-snotting"! fucking funny it would be! so go to gay porn sites day in and day out until you find a man giving another man a blowjob that has jizz coming out of his nose and mouth. by the way, keep up the good work

    2. Re:Snotting another first!! (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.23 12:18 (#2603370)

      WIPO, this is getting waaaay old, either drop it or revise it.... there've been no updates for days now...

      CmdrTaco

    3. Re:It's Taco SPAM!!! (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.22 17:28 (#2600815)

      A truly excellent and very humourous troll indeed!
      However...

      To complete this perverted orgy, fellow geeks Michael, Timothy, and Jamie often join in, dressed in black Gestapo uniforms, jack boots, and leather gloves.

      Black GeStaPo uniforms? The GeStaPo (Geheime Staatspolizei - Secret State Police) wore civilian clothes (although there are reports on them occasionally using Allgemeine SS uniforms in occupied territories).

      I seriously doubt that perverted individuals like CmdrTaco et al would have the good taste to ever wear the outstandingly beautiful black Waffen SS uniforms! Please update the FAQ accordingly.

      • Re:It's Taco SPAM!!! (Score:0)
        by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.23 4:06 (#2602610)

        Actually, it appears you are both wrong!! Ah ha!! I think our boy WIPO was thinking of the Allgemeine SS uniforms. Waffen SS were grey.

    4. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.21 4:49 (#2594325)

      oh yeah, you say you have masturbated only 2 times to this post. well, by the time it takes for me to get through reading it, i usually end up masturbated 5 to 6 times, 10 to 12 if i have the goatse.cx homepage loaded up and am looking at it side by side with the slashdot page. my keyboard, hands, mouse, monitor, the underside of my desk and around the floor under my desk are cum soaked and sticky with the man smell i know and love.

    5. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.21 4:41 (#2594311)

      for version 2 you should make a total re-write of the cod...errr...text and add some details about cmdrtaco and the homo-gang's happenings with their coworkers (osdn?) and all of the gay revelry they enjoy and promote. by the way, did i just see cmdrtaco on television promoting the nax hair removal system? i guess after using vaseline in and around his ass he grew quite a ponytail and it had to be removed somehow...ouch!

    6. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:-1, Troll)
      by TRoLLaXoR on 2001.11.21 3:59 (#2594191)

      WIPO, do you notice how few comments you get for anything you write/post/spam nowadays?

      -Trollaxor

    7. Jon-Katz docking (Score:-1)
      by sales_worldwide on 2001.11.20 11:53 (#2588488)

      You forgot to mention Jon Katz's "docking" games, where he places his chopper head to head with another chap, and rolls the other guys foreskin over his own circumcised end ("docking"), providing him with fantasies of actually having his own forskin ...
      "Making linux GPL was the best thing I ever did" - Torvalds. I'd hate to see the worst thing...

    8. Re:Snotting a first! (Score:-1)
      by Fucky the troll on 2001.11.20 11:28 (#2588446)

      Woah! When did the WIPO troll get freed? And how the fuck did I miss it?

      Excellent FP, sir.

      This is a sig virus. Please put me in your sig

    9. Re:Snotting a first! (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.20 11:04 (#2588407)

      omg that is crapflooding material if i ever saw it!!!!!! and u got a first post!!!! whoot to the wipo troll!!!

    10. GW, please.... (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.19 9:03 (#2583756)

      GW...you know we love every hair on your 27 acre ass... and I, for one, would never do anything untowards your graceful demeanor. And you probably have several friends that would love to help you do the bear dance all over my face if I so much as spelled your name wrong. And you know I'd defend your Constitutional right to defame God in heaven. I'd even help fund your education, should you ever decide to take that route. Hell, I'd buy you a tall tepid bear-whiz beer if you were here with me, right now!

      But. ...if you can't find another topic, I'm gonna step over your dead mother's grave and kick your assuredly anesthetitized butt clear across the playground.

      Now go stick your shaved head back down inside the woman's toilet, and just to show there's no hard feelings, I'll jump in the tow-truck and drive right over to help you pull it right out...ok?

      thanks

    11. Re:Help me Taco-Snotters!! (Score:-1)
      by mark knopfler 69 on 2001.11.19 8:25 (#2583695)

      I DO NOT BELIEVE YOU SIR. FOR ONE THING, THE E-MAIL FROM CMDRTACO DOES NOT HAVE ENOUGH GRAMMATICAL AND SPELLING MISTAKES. Let's be realistic here, CmdrTaco usually types with one hand, and since he is shaking from jacking off his aim on the keyboard isn't too good. Those e-mails were a little too well written. Sorry boy, you'll have to do better.

    12. Re: What the hell is "taco snotting"? (Score:-1)
      by WeatherTroll on 2001.11.19 8:14 (#2583667)

      You should update this to say VA Software instead of VA Linux.

    13. YOU ARE WINNER (Score:1)
      by smackmonkey on 2001.11.19 7:06 (#2583510)

      Crackhead moderators: this is +5, Hilarious material.

      --
      CNN declares War on Islam!
      Left-wing America declares War on its Civil Liberties!

    14. Re:On Taco-Snotting 1.9 (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.19 5:40 (#2583336)

      This was funny the first 100 times. Now it is getting boring!

    15. Digusting and Shameful (Score:-1)
      by egg troll on 2001.11.18 22:27 (#2582054)

      Having masturbated *twice* to this post, I'm still incredibly aroused! Come over for a Taco Snot. I'll be wearing my crotchless Clifford the Big Red Dog outfit!!

      For more info check out this /. article

    16. IMPROVE THE FAQ (Score:-1, Flamebait)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.18 12:03 (#2580822)

      add more links to goatse and to cowboineal's site to make it better. a link to rotten.com would be nice too

      • Re:IMPROVE THE FAQ (Score:0)
        by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.18 12:18 (#2580832)

        and a link to michael's site and to jon katz's site if he has one and homo's site. i dont know what else to say. maybe a few links to phallic.org they have nice penis pictures! a link to the planet quake site or whatever. really make the reader feel this faq really answers their questions. oh yeah, and when you talk about cmdrtaco snotting you, say he brought you to "orgasm after sweaty orgasm". describe it more is all i'm saying. and use more italics and bolding! and when you talk about jon katz shitting or whatever have a link to fecal japan on rotten.com

        other wise a great job wipo troll! keep up the good work!

    17. Re:CmdrTaco's filthy secret! (Score:-1)
      by Wil Wheaton on 2001.11.18 6:41 (#2580438)

      Hi. Let's be buddies.. butt buddies.
      --
      WIL WHEATON DOT NET

    18. WIPO speaks the truth (Score:-1)
      by dead_puppy on 2001.11.18 5:33 (#2580342)

      Here is an e-mail I received a week ago:

      From: malda@slashdot.org
      To: puppy_dead@hotmail.com
      Subject: were where you last friday? :(

      I thought we where supposed to meet at Backdoor's at 8-ish, sugar-lips? You could've at least told me that you could'nt make it! I was even in my favorite pink skirt for you, honey-cup... next time, you could be more considarite and tell me you cant come... bastard.

      --
      CmdrTaco (malda@slashdot.org)
      You finding Ling-Ling's head?

    19. Taco snotting is WRONG!!! (Score:-1)
      by Big_Ass_Spork on 2001.11.18 4:53 (#2580300)

      I do it wrong

      Laying here in the shadows of my room, I squint up at my love. My Ms. Portman. I am sore and tired after fucking her for eight solid hours. My chapped and aching dick is soaking in grits to relieve the pain. She gets on her knees and starts lapping the grits up out of the bowl. She places her beautiful hands on my penis and starts to lick the grits off my achy piece.

      Massaging my nutsack she....

      WAIT, I DO IT WRONG!!!!

      Yanking my dick out of her mouth I throw her to the ground and shove it in to her gaping freshly fisted ass. [goatse.cx]

      "OH BIG ASS SPORK!! Fuck my ass, fuck my ass good. DEEPER, my stallion, deeper!! Make a Beowulf cluster of sperm on my back!!"

      "Imagine a Beowulf cluster of this baby!"

      I DO IT WRONG!!!!

      ---
      All your Sporks are belong to Big_Ass_Spork! What you say?! All your Sporks are belo... forget it...

    20. Rob Malda Dead at age 25! (Score:-1)
      by j0nkatz on 2001.11.17 22:54 (#2579596)

      I just heard some sad news on the radio -- famous queerbait Rob Malda was found dead in his Holland home this morning. The details were a bit hazy, but it seems that he drowned in jizz while Taco Snotting his friend Hemos. I'm sure everyone in the /. community will miss him -- even if you didn't enjoy his queer antics and boring ass website, there's no denying his contributions to the homosesual cultural development, particularly in the areas of Taco snotting. Truly an American icon.

      I wanna Open Source sex so it won't be worth a shit either.

    21. TACO-SNOTTING is really Donkey-Punching (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.15 6:38 (#2567601)

      No no no, the correct term for that is "donkey-punch". I have eye-witnessed this amazing eye-popping event demonstrated on unsuspecting hose-monsters by my frat brothers in the past.. . :-)

    22. Re:the effect of knowlege laws... (Score:1)
      by AbsoluteRelativity on 2001.11.15 5:31 (#2567457)

      The WIPO Troll
      Slashdot and the Karma Lottery - News for uber monkeys, by uber monkeys.

    23. Re:Taco-Snotting (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.13 9:27 (#2557632)

      Oh, man that's just sick !

    24. HOW DO I GET AN ANONYMOUS PROXY? (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.13 9:03 (#2557604)

      TELL ME WHERE I CAN GET AN ANONYMOUS proxy please WIPO Troll. Maybe later i will join you in a snotting at my place. ;P

    25. Re:Taco-Snottage!?!?!? (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by vikool on 2001.11.13 7:43 (#2557495)

      what is this bull shit,i feel offened that some people feel so so senseless to post stuff like these esp when such a tragic incident has occured

    26. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1)
      by I.T.R.A.R.K. on 2001.11.11 22:38 (#2551890)

      Where the fuck do I sign up?!

      - I throw rocks at retarded kids

      "Adequacy.org: Where congenital stupidity is not an option, but a requirement."

    27. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 21:53 (#2551753)

      this shit is hilarious..keep up the good work.

    28. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by rockwood on 2001.11.11 21:49 (#2551746)

      OMG! That is the most disgusting thing I have ever heard! WHo in their right mind would sit down and waste the time to construct such a replusive story. I guess I'll be skipping lunch and dinner today.. and possibly tomorrow also. The game doesn't affect reality. Reality affects the game.

    29. Re:Ban this! It's disgusting!! (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 14:43 (#2550701)

      dude, this is crap-flood material if i ever saw it.
      duuuuuuuuudddddddddddddeeeeeeeee.

    30. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Flamebait)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 8:16 (#2550266)

      horny_rob_6969@hotmail.com

      Ah, so that's what the alt.binaries.pictures.erotica.horny-rob newsgroup is about!

    31. MOD THIS UP PLEASE!!! (Score:-1)
      by egg troll on 2001.11.11 5:34 (#2550024)

      +5, Arousing

      For more info check out this /. article

    32. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 4:39 (#2549891)

      WINNER>

    33. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 4:37 (#2549887)

      I love you. Why do you use your bitchslapped account, rather than signing up for a new account to post at +1 before getting bitchslapped by the censors here? I guess I should speak for myself, but I don't want to log out and lose all my slashdot customization properties, nor do I want to lose my 50 karma yet.

    34. Re:On Taco-Snotting (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.09 9:19 (#2542412)

      you fucking rock! right down to the expanded cvs id!

      WIPO trolls > linux

    ________________________________________

    $Id: tacosnotting.html,v 1.11 2001/11/25 15:40:22 wipo Exp $
    --

    J. Wipo Troll, Esq.
    Crapflooder Associates
    Slashdot.org

  9. Tuesday's fine Trolling Tradition (read: SNOTFEST) by The+WIPO+Troll · · Score: -1

    THE OFFICIAL TACO-SNOTTING FAQ
    By The WIPO Troll, $Revision: 1.11 $

    Why have I been receiving emails from CmdrTaco, in which he seems to be speaking in some kind of code language?

    Whenever Rob "CmdrTaco" Malda gets bored (and who wouldn't, running a site like Slashdot all day), he roams through the Slashdot database, penis in hand, looking for people who might enjoy engaging in homosexual orgies with him. How he determines this is anyone's guess; but if you have a homosexual-sounding nickname, or a nick with the letter P in it, you're in trouble.
    So this time, he found you. Lucky you.
    CmdrTaco's code language is relatively easy to decipher. He prefers to speak in thinly-veiled sexual innuendo to evade the watchful (but relatively stupid) eye of Slashdot's parent corporation, VA Software. CmdrTaco's "Commander" is, of course, his penis -- a small, withered little thing that lives in his pants that only comes out in the presence of other men or at the beck and call of CmdrTaco's own right hand. His "Taco bells" are the shriveled testes that droop beneath his Commander, and his "Taco sauce" is his, well, jizz. It should be more than obvious to you now what he means when he asks you to "ring his Taco bells" or "taste his gourmet Taco sauce."
    Lastly, there is a practice he refers to as "Taco-snotting" and the more shocking "circle-snot."

    Good Lord. What is "Taco-snotting?"

    "Taco-snotting" is the term used by CmdrTaco to refer to the practice of sucking the penis of a homosexual man (or unwilling heterosexual; CmdrTaco is rumored to prefer rape), then blowing the semen out his nose onto his partner's (victim's) face and body. A long, bubbly stream of milky-white semen is left on CmdrTaco's face, dribbling out of his nose and down his cheek: hence the term, "Taco-snotting."
    A "circle-snot" is a Taco-snotting circle-jerk, another practice common among the Slashdot crew. CmdrTaco, CowboiKneel, and Homos get together and Taco-snot each other with their gooey, sticky cum -- spooging their jizz-snot all over each other's faces and pasty, white bodies, until they're covered head to toe with each other's man juice. This can go on for hours. For the homosexual penetration that follows this lengthy foreplay, Roblowme is usually there to provide plenty of anal lubricant; he owns a limo service and has ample supplies of motor oil and axle grease ready to go.
    To complete this perverted orgy, fellow geeks Michael, Timothy, and Jamie will usually join in, dressed in tight leather mock-S.S. uniforms, jack boots, and leather gloves. The whole group then proceeds to snot each other's spunk and whip each other's pudgy asses with riding crops and chains until their pale, white geek bodies are exhausted and soaked in stinking sweat from the hours of passionate, homosexual revelry.

    Ewwwwww. So, can I stop receiving these emails?

    Hopefully.
    You most likely forgot to uncheck the "Willing to Taco-snot" checkbox in your account preferences. CmdrTaco has probably already got the hots for your wad, and he's probably already been lurking outside your bathroom window for weeks with a camera, some tissues and lube. There's no escaping a geek in heat, so it's probably too late for you, but you can possibly rectify this situation. To remove yourself from CmdrTaco's sights, log into your Slashdot account, go to your user page, click on Messages, and uncheck the box next to "Willing to Taco-snot." Maybe he'll ignore you. Probably not.

    I can't stop receiving these emails from CmdrTaco!?

    If you indulge him in a Taco-snot or two, he might leave you alone. You might also want to look into mail filtering, restraining orders, or purchasing a heavy, blunt object capable of warding off rampaging homosexual geeks in heat. Trust me, when they charge... oh, the humanity. If he gets you, and you let him Taco-snot you, you will most likely end up tied up in his basement to be used as his sex slave for the rest of your life (or until he accidentally drowns you in spunk in a circle-snot).

    Have you ever been Taco-Snotted?

    Unfortunately, yes. I first met CmdrTaco at an Open Source Convention. He invited me back to his room for a game of Quake and some "gourmet Tacos," but when I got there, he jumped me and tied me to his bed, stripping me. After taking his "Commander" out of his pants, Mr. Taco made me suck the withered thing six times. He then performed his vile Taco-snotting ritual on me three times over the next two hours, bringing me to orgasm after sweaty, mind-numbing orgasm... then he snotted my own milky-white jizz back onto my face, into my mouth, then again on my exposed belly.
    CmdrTaco invited several of his Open Source (or rather, "Open Sauce" -- man sauce) buddies over to continue the twisted snotfest. Linux Torvalds raped my ass with his "monolithic kernel," and Anal Cox used his "network stack" in a multitude of unspeakable ways on and in every orifice in my defenseless body. Michael was there in his leather Nazi uniform, caning my ass with a bamboo pole and ranting about "all those Censorware freaks out to get him."
    How did you finally escape, you ask? After about 16 hours of countless homosexual atrocities perpetrated against my restrained body, they all finally went to sleep on top of me, sweat-soaked and exhausted. I was left there, covered in bubbly, translucent jizz-snot, chained to the bed, with half a dozen fat, pasty-white fags lying around and on top of me. Fortunately the spooge coating my flesh worked wonderfully as a lubricant; I was able to squirm my way out of the handcuffs and slip out the back door. I'm just glad I survived the ordeal. These geeks had a lot of built-up spunk in their wads -- I could've easily been drowned!

    That's horrible. Does "Taco-snotting" have anything to do with CmdrTaco's "special taco"?

    No, that's a different disgusting perversion CmdrTaco indulges himself in. CmdrTaco is usually not satisfied with merely snotting your own jizz back onto your face, he most often enjoys involving his own bodily fluids in his twisted games. WeatherTroll has spent some time trying to educate the Slashdot readership about this vile practice (emphasis added):
    You may be wondering what CmdrTaco's "special taco" is. You will be wishing that you hadn't been wondering after you finish reading this post. To make his "special taco", CmdrTaco takes a taco shell and shits on it. He then adds lettuce, jacks off on the taco, and adds a compound to make the person who eats the taco unconscious. Of course, the compound does not make the person unconscious until the taco is fully eaten. Thus CmdrTaco force-feeds the taco to the unsuspecting victim.
    After the victim is unconscious, he is held against his will and used for CmdrTaco's nefarious sexual purposes. This includes shoving taco shells up the victim's ass, Taco-snotting, and getting Jon Katz involved.
    Completely different, yet no less revolting. It should be clear to you now that CmdrTaco is a very, very sick individual, as are most of the Slashdot editors.

    Does Jon Katz get involved in any of this? I thought he was a paedophile, not a homosexual.

    Actually, Jon Katz is a homosexual paedophile. He's also a coprophiliac, and, many suspect, a zoophile. Jon Katz is somewhat of a loner and doesn't involve himself in circle-snots. Mr. Katz usually engages in a game called " Katz juicy-douching" with his harem of little-boy slaves: a vile practice which involves administering an enema to himself of the little boy's urine (forced out of them with a pair of pliers), spooging the vile muck from his ass back into the enema bag, then squirting and slathering the goo all over himself, and the little boy's chained-up and naked bodies. If he's in the mood, he will sometimes skip refilling the enema bag and just squirt it from his ass onto his boys. Unwilling boys are further tortured with the pliers until they comply and allow Mr. Katz to juicy-douche them for the rest of their lives.
    As I already said, Mr. Katz is also a zoophile. As if the sexual escapades with the helpless little boys aren't enough, Jon usually enjoys his juicy-douches best when his penis is firmly planted in a female goat's anus. He is also rumoured to get off on watching his little boys eat the goat's small, bean-like turds.

    ...Are you getting hard writing this?

    Why, yes. :) Join me in a WIPO-snot?

    No, thanks. I'm already CmdrTaco's boi toi.

    ________________________________________
    READER COMMENTS

    1. Re:The Taco-Snotting FAQ Rides Again!! (Updated so (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.25 9:14 (#2609574)

      try to find a pic of actual "taco-snotting"! fucking funny it would be! so go to gay porn sites day in and day out until you find a man giving another man a blowjob that has jizz coming out of his nose and mouth. by the way, keep up the good work

    2. Re:Snotting another first!! (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.23 12:18 (#2603370)

      WIPO, this is getting waaaay old, either drop it or revise it.... there've been no updates for days now...

      CmdrTaco

    3. Re:It's Taco SPAM!!! (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.22 17:28 (#2600815)

      A truly excellent and very humourous troll indeed!
      However...

      To complete this perverted orgy, fellow geeks Michael, Timothy, and Jamie often join in, dressed in black Gestapo uniforms, jack boots, and leather gloves.

      Black GeStaPo uniforms? The GeStaPo (Geheime Staatspolizei - Secret State Police) wore civilian clothes (although there are reports on them occasionally using Allgemeine SS uniforms in occupied territories).

      I seriously doubt that perverted individuals like CmdrTaco et al would have the good taste to ever wear the outstandingly beautiful black Waffen SS uniforms! Please update the FAQ accordingly.

      • Re:It's Taco SPAM!!! (Score:0)
        by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.23 4:06 (#2602610)

        Actually, it appears you are both wrong!! Ah ha!! I think our boy WIPO was thinking of the Allgemeine SS uniforms. Waffen SS were grey.

    4. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.21 4:49 (#2594325)

      oh yeah, you say you have masturbated only 2 times to this post. well, by the time it takes for me to get through reading it, i usually end up masturbated 5 to 6 times, 10 to 12 if i have the goatse.cx homepage loaded up and am looking at it side by side with the slashdot page. my keyboard, hands, mouse, monitor, the underside of my desk and around the floor under my desk are cum soaked and sticky with the man smell i know and love.

    5. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.21 4:41 (#2594311)

      for version 2 you should make a total re-write of the cod...errr...text and add some details about cmdrtaco and the homo-gang's happenings with their coworkers (osdn?) and all of the gay revelry they enjoy and promote. by the way, did i just see cmdrtaco on television promoting the nax hair removal system? i guess after using vaseline in and around his ass he grew quite a ponytail and it had to be removed somehow...ouch!

    6. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:-1, Troll)
      by TRoLLaXoR on 2001.11.21 3:59 (#2594191)

      WIPO, do you notice how few comments you get for anything you write/post/spam nowadays?

      -Trollaxor

    7. Jon-Katz docking (Score:-1)
      by sales_worldwide on 2001.11.20 11:53 (#2588488)

      You forgot to mention Jon Katz's "docking" games, where he places his chopper head to head with another chap, and rolls the other guys foreskin over his own circumcised end ("docking"), providing him with fantasies of actually having his own forskin ...
      "Making linux GPL was the best thing I ever did" - Torvalds. I'd hate to see the worst thing...

    8. Re:Snotting a first! (Score:-1)
      by Fucky the troll on 2001.11.20 11:28 (#2588446)

      Woah! When did the WIPO troll get freed? And how the fuck did I miss it?

      Excellent FP, sir.

      This is a sig virus. Please put me in your sig

    9. Re:Snotting a first! (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.20 11:04 (#2588407)

      omg that is crapflooding material if i ever saw it!!!!!! and u got a first post!!!! whoot to the wipo troll!!!

    10. GW, please.... (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.19 9:03 (#2583756)

      GW...you know we love every hair on your 27 acre ass... and I, for one, would never do anything untowards your graceful demeanor. And you probably have several friends that would love to help you do the bear dance all over my face if I so much as spelled your name wrong. And you know I'd defend your Constitutional right to defame God in heaven. I'd even help fund your education, should you ever decide to take that route. Hell, I'd buy you a tall tepid bear-whiz beer if you were here with me, right now!

      But. ...if you can't find another topic, I'm gonna step over your dead mother's grave and kick your assuredly anesthetitized butt clear across the playground.

      Now go stick your shaved head back down inside the woman's toilet, and just to show there's no hard feelings, I'll jump in the tow-truck and drive right over to help you pull it right out...ok?

      thanks

    11. Re:Help me Taco-Snotters!! (Score:-1)
      by mark knopfler 69 on 2001.11.19 8:25 (#2583695)

      I DO NOT BELIEVE YOU SIR. FOR ONE THING, THE E-MAIL FROM CMDRTACO DOES NOT HAVE ENOUGH GRAMMATICAL AND SPELLING MISTAKES. Let's be realistic here, CmdrTaco usually types with one hand, and since he is shaking from jacking off his aim on the keyboard isn't too good. Those e-mails were a little too well written. Sorry boy, you'll have to do better.

    12. Re: What the hell is "taco snotting"? (Score:-1)
      by WeatherTroll on 2001.11.19 8:14 (#2583667)

      You should update this to say VA Software instead of VA Linux.

    13. YOU ARE WINNER (Score:1)
      by smackmonkey on 2001.11.19 7:06 (#2583510)

      Crackhead moderators: this is +5, Hilarious material.

      --
      CNN declares War on Islam!
      Left-wing America declares War on its Civil Liberties!

    14. Re:On Taco-Snotting 1.9 (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.19 5:40 (#2583336)

      This was funny the first 100 times. Now it is getting boring!

    15. Digusting and Shameful (Score:-1)
      by egg troll on 2001.11.18 22:27 (#2582054)

      Having masturbated *twice* to this post, I'm still incredibly aroused! Come over for a Taco Snot. I'll be wearing my crotchless Clifford the Big Red Dog outfit!!

      For more info check out this /. article

    16. IMPROVE THE FAQ (Score:-1, Flamebait)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.18 12:03 (#2580822)

      add more links to goatse and to cowboineal's site to make it better. a link to rotten.com would be nice too

      • Re:IMPROVE THE FAQ (Score:0)
        by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.18 12:18 (#2580832)

        and a link to michael's site and to jon katz's site if he has one and homo's site. i dont know what else to say. maybe a few links to phallic.org they have nice penis pictures! a link to the planet quake site or whatever. really make the reader feel this faq really answers their questions. oh yeah, and when you talk about cmdrtaco snotting you, say he brought you to "orgasm after sweaty orgasm". describe it more is all i'm saying. and use more italics and bolding! and when you talk about jon katz shitting or whatever have a link to fecal japan on rotten.com

        other wise a great job wipo troll! keep up the good work!

    17. Re:CmdrTaco's filthy secret! (Score:-1)
      by Wil Wheaton on 2001.11.18 6:41 (#2580438)

      Hi. Let's be buddies.. butt buddies.
      --
      WIL WHEATON DOT NET

    18. WIPO speaks the truth (Score:-1)
      by dead_puppy on 2001.11.18 5:33 (#2580342)

      Here is an e-mail I received a week ago:

      From: malda@slashdot.org
      To: puppy_dead@hotmail.com
      Subject: were where you last friday? :(

      I thought we where supposed to meet at Backdoor's at 8-ish, sugar-lips? You could've at least told me that you could'nt make it! I was even in my favorite pink skirt for you, honey-cup... next time, you could be more considarite and tell me you cant come... bastard.

      --
      CmdrTaco (malda@slashdot.org)
      You finding Ling-Ling's head?

    19. Taco snotting is WRONG!!! (Score:-1)
      by Big_Ass_Spork on 2001.11.18 4:53 (#2580300)

      I do it wrong

      Laying here in the shadows of my room, I squint up at my love. My Ms. Portman. I am sore and tired after fucking her for eight solid hours. My chapped and aching dick is soaking in grits to relieve the pain. She gets on her knees and starts lapping the grits up out of the bowl. She places her beautiful hands on my penis and starts to lick the grits off my achy piece.

      Massaging my nutsack she....

      WAIT, I DO IT WRONG!!!!

      Yanking my dick out of her mouth I throw her to the ground and shove it in to her gaping freshly fisted ass. [goatse.cx]

      "OH BIG ASS SPORK!! Fuck my ass, fuck my ass good. DEEPER, my stallion, deeper!! Make a Beowulf cluster of sperm on my back!!"

      "Imagine a Beowulf cluster of this baby!"

      I DO IT WRONG!!!!

      ---
      All your Sporks are belong to Big_Ass_Spork! What you say?! All your Sporks are belo... forget it...

    20. Rob Malda Dead at age 25! (Score:-1)
      by j0nkatz on 2001.11.17 22:54 (#2579596)

      I just heard some sad news on the radio -- famous queerbait Rob Malda was found dead in his Holland home this morning. The details were a bit hazy, but it seems that he drowned in jizz while Taco Snotting his friend Hemos. I'm sure everyone in the /. community will miss him -- even if you didn't enjoy his queer antics and boring ass website, there's no denying his contributions to the homosesual cultural development, particularly in the areas of Taco snotting. Truly an American icon.

      I wanna Open Source sex so it won't be worth a shit either.

    21. TACO-SNOTTING is really Donkey-Punching (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.15 6:38 (#2567601)

      No no no, the correct term for that is "donkey-punch". I have eye-witnessed this amazing eye-popping event demonstrated on unsuspecting hose-monsters by my frat brothers in the past.. . :-)

    22. Re:the effect of knowlege laws... (Score:1)
      by AbsoluteRelativity on 2001.11.15 5:31 (#2567457)

      The WIPO Troll
      Slashdot and the Karma Lottery - News for uber monkeys, by uber monkeys.

    23. Re:Taco-Snotting (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.13 9:27 (#2557632)

      Oh, man that's just sick !

    24. HOW DO I GET AN ANONYMOUS PROXY? (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.13 9:03 (#2557604)

      TELL ME WHERE I CAN GET AN ANONYMOUS proxy please WIPO Troll. Maybe later i will join you in a snotting at my place. ;P

    25. Re:Taco-Snottage!?!?!? (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by vikool on 2001.11.13 7:43 (#2557495)

      what is this bull shit,i feel offened that some people feel so so senseless to post stuff like these esp when such a tragic incident has occured

    26. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1)
      by I.T.R.A.R.K. on 2001.11.11 22:38 (#2551890)

      Where the fuck do I sign up?!

      - I throw rocks at retarded kids

      "Adequacy.org: Where congenital stupidity is not an option, but a requirement."

    27. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 21:53 (#2551753)

      this shit is hilarious..keep up the good work.

    28. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by rockwood on 2001.11.11 21:49 (#2551746)

      OMG! That is the most disgusting thing I have ever heard! WHo in their right mind would sit down and waste the time to construct such a replusive story. I guess I'll be skipping lunch and dinner today.. and possibly tomorrow also. The game doesn't affect reality. Reality affects the game.

    29. Re:Ban this! It's disgusting!! (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 14:43 (#2550701)

      dude, this is crap-flood material if i ever saw it.
      duuuuuuuuudddddddddddddeeeeeeeee.

    30. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Flamebait)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 8:16 (#2550266)

      horny_rob_6969@hotmail.com

      Ah, so that's what the alt.binaries.pictures.erotica.horny-rob newsgroup is about!

    31. MOD THIS UP PLEASE!!! (Score:-1)
      by egg troll on 2001.11.11 5:34 (#2550024)

      +5, Arousing

      For more info check out this /. article

    32. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 4:39 (#2549891)

      WINNER>

    33. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 4:37 (#2549887)

      I love you. Why do you use your bitchslapped account, rather than signing up for a new account to post at +1 before getting bitchslapped by the censors here? I guess I should speak for myself, but I don't want to log out and lose all my slashdot customization properties, nor do I want to lose my 50 karma yet.

    34. Re:On Taco-Snotting (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.09 9:19 (#2542412)

      you fucking rock! right down to the expanded cvs id!

      WIPO trolls > linux

    ________________________________________

    $Id: tacosnotting.html,v 1.11 2001/11/25 15:40:22 wipo Exp $
    --

    J. Wipo Troll, Esq.
    Crapflooder Associates
    Slashdot.org

  10. good work by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Troll

    Trollwave 2001 -- an endless space odyssey in time.

    We are not smart.

    Troll network associates.

  11. Snot it to me!!! (Trollin' for Tuesday!!) by The+WIPO+Troll · · Score: -1

    THE OFFICIAL TACO-SNOTTING FAQ
    By The WIPO Troll, $Revision: 1.11 $

    Why have I been receiving emails from CmdrTaco, in which he seems to be speaking in some kind of code language?

    Whenever Rob "CmdrTaco" Malda gets bored (and who wouldn't, running a site like Slashdot all day), he roams through the Slashdot database, penis in hand, looking for people who might enjoy engaging in homosexual orgies with him. How he determines this is anyone's guess; but if you have a homosexual-sounding nickname, or a nick with the letter P in it, you're in trouble.
    So this time, he found you. Lucky you.
    CmdrTaco's code language is relatively easy to decipher. He prefers to speak in thinly-veiled sexual innuendo to evade the watchful (but relatively stupid) eye of Slashdot's parent corporation, VA Software. CmdrTaco's "Commander" is, of course, his penis -- a small, withered little thing that lives in his pants that only comes out in the presence of other men or at the beck and call of CmdrTaco's own right hand. His "Taco bells" are the shriveled testes that droop beneath his Commander, and his "Taco sauce" is his, well, jizz. It should be more than obvious to you now what he means when he asks you to "ring his Taco bells" or "taste his gourmet Taco sauce."
    Lastly, there is a practice he refers to as "Taco-snotting" and the more shocking "circle-snot."

    Good Lord. What is "Taco-snotting?"

    "Taco-snotting" is the term used by CmdrTaco to refer to the practice of sucking the penis of a homosexual man (or unwilling heterosexual; CmdrTaco is rumored to prefer rape), then blowing the semen out his nose onto his partner's (victim's) face and body. A long, bubbly stream of milky-white semen is left on CmdrTaco's face, dribbling out of his nose and down his cheek: hence the term, "Taco-snotting."
    A "circle-snot" is a Taco-snotting circle-jerk, another practice common among the Slashdot crew. CmdrTaco, CowboiKneel, and Homos get together and Taco-snot each other with their gooey, sticky cum -- spooging their jizz-snot all over each other's faces and pasty, white bodies, until they're covered head to toe with each other's man juice. This can go on for hours. For the homosexual penetration that follows this lengthy foreplay, Roblowme is usually there to provide plenty of anal lubricant; he owns a limo service and has ample supplies of motor oil and axle grease ready to go.
    To complete this perverted orgy, fellow geeks Michael, Timothy, and Jamie will usually join in, dressed in tight leather mock-S.S. uniforms, jack boots, and leather gloves. The whole group then proceeds to snot each other's spunk and whip each other's pudgy asses with riding crops and chains until their pale, white geek bodies are exhausted and soaked in stinking sweat from the hours of passionate, homosexual revelry.

    Ewwwwww. So, can I stop receiving these emails?

    Hopefully.
    You most likely forgot to uncheck the "Willing to Taco-snot" checkbox in your account preferences. CmdrTaco has probably already got the hots for your wad, and he's probably already been lurking outside your bathroom window for weeks with a camera, some tissues and lube. There's no escaping a geek in heat, so it's probably too late for you, but you can possibly rectify this situation. To remove yourself from CmdrTaco's sights, log into your Slashdot account, go to your user page, click on Messages, and uncheck the box next to "Willing to Taco-snot." Maybe he'll ignore you. Probably not.

    I can't stop receiving these emails from CmdrTaco!?

    If you indulge him in a Taco-snot or two, he might leave you alone. You might also want to look into mail filtering, restraining orders, or purchasing a heavy, blunt object capable of warding off rampaging homosexual geeks in heat. Trust me, when they charge... oh, the humanity. If he gets you, and you let him Taco-snot you, you will most likely end up tied up in his basement to be used as his sex slave for the rest of your life (or until he accidentally drowns you in spunk in a circle-snot).

    Have you ever been Taco-Snotted?

    Unfortunately, yes. I first met CmdrTaco at an Open Source Convention. He invited me back to his room for a game of Quake and some "gourmet Tacos," but when I got there, he jumped me and tied me to his bed, stripping me. After taking his "Commander" out of his pants, Mr. Taco made me suck the withered thing six times. He then performed his vile Taco-snotting ritual on me three times over the next two hours, bringing me to orgasm after sweaty, mind-numbing orgasm... then he snotted my own milky-white jizz back onto my face, into my mouth, then again on my exposed belly.
    CmdrTaco invited several of his Open Source (or rather, "Open Sauce" -- man sauce) buddies over to continue the twisted snotfest. Linux Torvalds raped my ass with his "monolithic kernel," and Anal Cox used his "network stack" in a multitude of unspeakable ways on and in every orifice in my defenseless body. Michael was there in his leather Nazi uniform, caning my ass with a bamboo pole and ranting about "all those Censorware freaks out to get him."
    How did you finally escape, you ask? After about 16 hours of countless homosexual atrocities perpetrated against my restrained body, they all finally went to sleep on top of me, sweat-soaked and exhausted. I was left there, covered in bubbly, translucent jizz-snot, chained to the bed, with half a dozen fat, pasty-white fags lying around and on top of me. Fortunately the spooge coating my flesh worked wonderfully as a lubricant; I was able to squirm my way out of the handcuffs and slip out the back door. I'm just glad I survived the ordeal. These geeks had a lot of built-up spunk in their wads -- I could've easily been drowned!

    That's horrible. Does "Taco-snotting" have anything to do with CmdrTaco's "special taco"?

    No, that's a different disgusting perversion CmdrTaco indulges himself in. CmdrTaco is usually not satisfied with merely snotting your own jizz back onto your face, he most often enjoys involving his own bodily fluids in his twisted games. WeatherTroll has spent some time trying to educate the Slashdot readership about this vile practice (emphasis added):
    You may be wondering what CmdrTaco's "special taco" is. You will be wishing that you hadn't been wondering after you finish reading this post. To make his "special taco", CmdrTaco takes a taco shell and shits on it. He then adds lettuce, jacks off on the taco, and adds a compound to make the person who eats the taco unconscious. Of course, the compound does not make the person unconscious until the taco is fully eaten. Thus CmdrTaco force-feeds the taco to the unsuspecting victim.
    After the victim is unconscious, he is held against his will and used for CmdrTaco's nefarious sexual purposes. This includes shoving taco shells up the victim's ass, Taco-snotting, and getting Jon Katz involved.
    Completely different, yet no less revolting. It should be clear to you now that CmdrTaco is a very, very sick individual, as are most of the Slashdot editors.

    Does Jon Katz get involved in any of this? I thought he was a paedophile, not a homosexual.

    Actually, Jon Katz is a homosexual paedophile. He's also a coprophiliac, and, many suspect, a zoophile. Jon Katz is somewhat of a loner and doesn't involve himself in circle-snots. Mr. Katz usually engages in a game called " Katz juicy-douching" with his harem of little-boy slaves: a vile practice which involves administering an enema to himself of the little boy's urine (forced out of them with a pair of pliers), spooging the vile muck from his ass back into the enema bag, then squirting and slathering the goo all over himself, and the little boy's chained-up and naked bodies. If he's in the mood, he will sometimes skip refilling the enema bag and just squirt it from his ass onto his boys. Unwilling boys are further tortured with the pliers until they comply and allow Mr. Katz to juicy-douche them for the rest of their lives.
    As I already said, Mr. Katz is also a zoophile. As if the sexual escapades with the helpless little boys aren't enough, Jon usually enjoys his juicy-douches best when his penis is firmly planted in a female goat's anus. He is also rumoured to get off on watching his little boys eat the goat's small, bean-like turds.

    ...Are you getting hard writing this?

    Why, yes. :) Join me in a WIPO-snot?

    No, thanks. I'm already CmdrTaco's boi toi.

    ________________________________________
    READER COMMENTS

    1. Re:The Taco-Snotting FAQ Rides Again!! (Updated so (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.25 9:14 (#2609574)

      try to find a pic of actual "taco-snotting"! fucking funny it would be! so go to gay porn sites day in and day out until you find a man giving another man a blowjob that has jizz coming out of his nose and mouth. by the way, keep up the good work

    2. Re:Snotting another first!! (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.23 12:18 (#2603370)

      WIPO, this is getting waaaay old, either drop it or revise it.... there've been no updates for days now...

      CmdrTaco

    3. Re:It's Taco SPAM!!! (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.22 17:28 (#2600815)

      A truly excellent and very humourous troll indeed!
      However...

      To complete this perverted orgy, fellow geeks Michael, Timothy, and Jamie often join in, dressed in black Gestapo uniforms, jack boots, and leather gloves.

      Black GeStaPo uniforms? The GeStaPo (Geheime Staatspolizei - Secret State Police) wore civilian clothes (although there are reports on them occasionally using Allgemeine SS uniforms in occupied territories).

      I seriously doubt that perverted individuals like CmdrTaco et al would have the good taste to ever wear the outstandingly beautiful black Waffen SS uniforms! Please update the FAQ accordingly.

      • Re:It's Taco SPAM!!! (Score:0)
        by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.23 4:06 (#2602610)

        Actually, it appears you are both wrong!! Ah ha!! I think our boy WIPO was thinking of the Allgemeine SS uniforms. Waffen SS were grey.

    4. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.21 4:49 (#2594325)

      oh yeah, you say you have masturbated only 2 times to this post. well, by the time it takes for me to get through reading it, i usually end up masturbated 5 to 6 times, 10 to 12 if i have the goatse.cx homepage loaded up and am looking at it side by side with the slashdot page. my keyboard, hands, mouse, monitor, the underside of my desk and around the floor under my desk are cum soaked and sticky with the man smell i know and love.

    5. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.21 4:41 (#2594311)

      for version 2 you should make a total re-write of the cod...errr...text and add some details about cmdrtaco and the homo-gang's happenings with their coworkers (osdn?) and all of the gay revelry they enjoy and promote. by the way, did i just see cmdrtaco on television promoting the nax hair removal system? i guess after using vaseline in and around his ass he grew quite a ponytail and it had to be removed somehow...ouch!

    6. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:-1, Troll)
      by TRoLLaXoR on 2001.11.21 3:59 (#2594191)

      WIPO, do you notice how few comments you get for anything you write/post/spam nowadays?

      -Trollaxor

    7. Jon-Katz docking (Score:-1)
      by sales_worldwide on 2001.11.20 11:53 (#2588488)

      You forgot to mention Jon Katz's "docking" games, where he places his chopper head to head with another chap, and rolls the other guys foreskin over his own circumcised end ("docking"), providing him with fantasies of actually having his own forskin ...
      "Making linux GPL was the best thing I ever did" - Torvalds. I'd hate to see the worst thing...

    8. Re:Snotting a first! (Score:-1)
      by Fucky the troll on 2001.11.20 11:28 (#2588446)

      Woah! When did the WIPO troll get freed? And how the fuck did I miss it?

      Excellent FP, sir.

      This is a sig virus. Please put me in your sig

    9. Re:Snotting a first! (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.20 11:04 (#2588407)

      omg that is crapflooding material if i ever saw it!!!!!! and u got a first post!!!! whoot to the wipo troll!!!

    10. GW, please.... (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.19 9:03 (#2583756)

      GW...you know we love every hair on your 27 acre ass... and I, for one, would never do anything untowards your graceful demeanor. And you probably have several friends that would love to help you do the bear dance all over my face if I so much as spelled your name wrong. And you know I'd defend your Constitutional right to defame God in heaven. I'd even help fund your education, should you ever decide to take that route. Hell, I'd buy you a tall tepid bear-whiz beer if you were here with me, right now!

      But. ...if you can't find another topic, I'm gonna step over your dead mother's grave and kick your assuredly anesthetitized butt clear across the playground.

      Now go stick your shaved head back down inside the woman's toilet, and just to show there's no hard feelings, I'll jump in the tow-truck and drive right over to help you pull it right out...ok?

      thanks

    11. Re:Help me Taco-Snotters!! (Score:-1)
      by mark knopfler 69 on 2001.11.19 8:25 (#2583695)

      I DO NOT BELIEVE YOU SIR. FOR ONE THING, THE E-MAIL FROM CMDRTACO DOES NOT HAVE ENOUGH GRAMMATICAL AND SPELLING MISTAKES. Let's be realistic here, CmdrTaco usually types with one hand, and since he is shaking from jacking off his aim on the keyboard isn't too good. Those e-mails were a little too well written. Sorry boy, you'll have to do better.

    12. Re: What the hell is "taco snotting"? (Score:-1)
      by WeatherTroll on 2001.11.19 8:14 (#2583667)

      You should update this to say VA Software instead of VA Linux.

    13. YOU ARE WINNER (Score:1)
      by smackmonkey on 2001.11.19 7:06 (#2583510)

      Crackhead moderators: this is +5, Hilarious material.

      --
      CNN declares War on Islam!
      Left-wing America declares War on its Civil Liberties!

    14. Re:On Taco-Snotting 1.9 (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.19 5:40 (#2583336)

      This was funny the first 100 times. Now it is getting boring!

    15. Digusting and Shameful (Score:-1)
      by egg troll on 2001.11.18 22:27 (#2582054)

      Having masturbated *twice* to this post, I'm still incredibly aroused! Come over for a Taco Snot. I'll be wearing my crotchless Clifford the Big Red Dog outfit!!

      For more info check out this /. article

    16. IMPROVE THE FAQ (Score:-1, Flamebait)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.18 12:03 (#2580822)

      add more links to goatse and to cowboineal's site to make it better. a link to rotten.com would be nice too

      • Re:IMPROVE THE FAQ (Score:0)
        by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.18 12:18 (#2580832)

        and a link to michael's site and to jon katz's site if he has one and homo's site. i dont know what else to say. maybe a few links to phallic.org they have nice penis pictures! a link to the planet quake site or whatever. really make the reader feel this faq really answers their questions. oh yeah, and when you talk about cmdrtaco snotting you, say he brought you to "orgasm after sweaty orgasm". describe it more is all i'm saying. and use more italics and bolding! and when you talk about jon katz shitting or whatever have a link to fecal japan on rotten.com

        other wise a great job wipo troll! keep up the good work!

    17. Re:CmdrTaco's filthy secret! (Score:-1)
      by Wil Wheaton on 2001.11.18 6:41 (#2580438)

      Hi. Let's be buddies.. butt buddies.
      --
      WIL WHEATON DOT NET

    18. WIPO speaks the truth (Score:-1)
      by dead_puppy on 2001.11.18 5:33 (#2580342)

      Here is an e-mail I received a week ago:

      From: malda@slashdot.org
      To: puppy_dead@hotmail.com
      Subject: were where you last friday? :(

      I thought we where supposed to meet at Backdoor's at 8-ish, sugar-lips? You could've at least told me that you could'nt make it! I was even in my favorite pink skirt for you, honey-cup... next time, you could be more considarite and tell me you cant come... bastard.

      --
      CmdrTaco (malda@slashdot.org)
      You finding Ling-Ling's head?

    19. Taco snotting is WRONG!!! (Score:-1)
      by Big_Ass_Spork on 2001.11.18 4:53 (#2580300)

      I do it wrong

      Laying here in the shadows of my room, I squint up at my love. My Ms. Portman. I am sore and tired after fucking her for eight solid hours. My chapped and aching dick is soaking in grits to relieve the pain. She gets on her knees and starts lapping the grits up out of the bowl. She places her beautiful hands on my penis and starts to lick the grits off my achy piece.

      Massaging my nutsack she....

      WAIT, I DO IT WRONG!!!!

      Yanking my dick out of her mouth I throw her to the ground and shove it in to her gaping freshly fisted ass. [goatse.cx]

      "OH BIG ASS SPORK!! Fuck my ass, fuck my ass good. DEEPER, my stallion, deeper!! Make a Beowulf cluster of sperm on my back!!"

      "Imagine a Beowulf cluster of this baby!"

      I DO IT WRONG!!!!

      ---
      All your Sporks are belong to Big_Ass_Spork! What you say?! All your Sporks are belo... forget it...

    20. Rob Malda Dead at age 25! (Score:-1)
      by j0nkatz on 2001.11.17 22:54 (#2579596)

      I just heard some sad news on the radio -- famous queerbait Rob Malda was found dead in his Holland home this morning. The details were a bit hazy, but it seems that he drowned in jizz while Taco Snotting his friend Hemos. I'm sure everyone in the /. community will miss him -- even if you didn't enjoy his queer antics and boring ass website, there's no denying his contributions to the homosesual cultural development, particularly in the areas of Taco snotting. Truly an American icon.

      I wanna Open Source sex so it won't be worth a shit either.

    21. TACO-SNOTTING is really Donkey-Punching (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.15 6:38 (#2567601)

      No no no, the correct term for that is "donkey-punch". I have eye-witnessed this amazing eye-popping event demonstrated on unsuspecting hose-monsters by my frat brothers in the past.. . :-)

    22. Re:the effect of knowlege laws... (Score:1)
      by AbsoluteRelativity on 2001.11.15 5:31 (#2567457)

      The WIPO Troll
      Slashdot and the Karma Lottery - News for uber monkeys, by uber monkeys.

    23. Re:Taco-Snotting (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.13 9:27 (#2557632)

      Oh, man that's just sick !

    24. HOW DO I GET AN ANONYMOUS PROXY? (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.13 9:03 (#2557604)

      TELL ME WHERE I CAN GET AN ANONYMOUS proxy please WIPO Troll. Maybe later i will join you in a snotting at my place. ;P

    25. Re:Taco-Snottage!?!?!? (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by vikool on 2001.11.13 7:43 (#2557495)

      what is this bull shit,i feel offened that some people feel so so senseless to post stuff like these esp when such a tragic incident has occured

    26. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1)
      by I.T.R.A.R.K. on 2001.11.11 22:38 (#2551890)

      Where the fuck do I sign up?!

      - I throw rocks at retarded kids

      "Adequacy.org: Where congenital stupidity is not an option, but a requirement."

    27. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 21:53 (#2551753)

      this shit is hilarious..keep up the good work.

    28. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by rockwood on 2001.11.11 21:49 (#2551746)

      OMG! That is the most disgusting thing I have ever heard! WHo in their right mind would sit down and waste the time to construct such a replusive story. I guess I'll be skipping lunch and dinner today.. and possibly tomorrow also. The game doesn't affect reality. Reality affects the game.

    29. Re:Ban this! It's disgusting!! (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 14:43 (#2550701)

      dude, this is crap-flood material if i ever saw it.
      duuuuuuuuudddddddddddddeeeeeeeee.

    30. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Flamebait)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 8:16 (#2550266)

      horny_rob_6969@hotmail.com

      Ah, so that's what the alt.binaries.pictures.erotica.horny-rob newsgroup is about!

    31. MOD THIS UP PLEASE!!! (Score:-1)
      by egg troll on 2001.11.11 5:34 (#2550024)

      +5, Arousing

      For more info check out this /. article

    32. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 4:39 (#2549891)

      WINNER>

    33. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 4:37 (#2549887)

      I love you. Why do you use your bitchslapped account, rather than signing up for a new account to post at +1 before getting bitchslapped by the censors here? I guess I should speak for myself, but I don't want to log out and lose all my slashdot customization properties, nor do I want to lose my 50 karma yet.

    34. Re:On Taco-Snotting (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.09 9:19 (#2542412)

      you fucking rock! right down to the expanded cvs id!

      WIPO trolls > linux

    ________________________________________

    $Id: tacosnotting.html,v 1.11 2001/11/25 15:40:22 wipo Exp $
    --

    J. Wipo Troll, Esq.
    Crapflooder Associates
    Slashdot.org

  12. WWW by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    Trollwave 2001 -- an endless space odyssey in time.

    Surfing at the edge of "now" with us.

    Troll network associates.

  13. I'm a Taco-snotting MANIAC!!! by The+WIPO+Troll · · Score: -1

    THE OFFICIAL TACO-SNOTTING FAQ
    By The WIPO Troll, $Revision: 1.11 $

    Why have I been receiving emails from CmdrTaco, in which he seems to be speaking in some kind of code language?

    Whenever Rob "CmdrTaco" Malda gets bored (and who wouldn't, running a site like Slashdot all day), he roams through the Slashdot database, penis in hand, looking for people who might enjoy engaging in homosexual orgies with him. How he determines this is anyone's guess; but if you have a homosexual-sounding nickname, or a nick with the letter P in it, you're in trouble.
    So this time, he found you. Lucky you.
    CmdrTaco's code language is relatively easy to decipher. He prefers to speak in thinly-veiled sexual innuendo to evade the watchful (but relatively stupid) eye of Slashdot's parent corporation, VA Software. CmdrTaco's "Commander" is, of course, his penis -- a small, withered little thing that lives in his pants that only comes out in the presence of other men or at the beck and call of CmdrTaco's own right hand. His "Taco bells" are the shriveled testes that droop beneath his Commander, and his "Taco sauce" is his, well, jizz. It should be more than obvious to you now what he means when he asks you to "ring his Taco bells" or "taste his gourmet Taco sauce."
    Lastly, there is a practice he refers to as "Taco-snotting" and the more shocking "circle-snot."

    Good Lord. What is "Taco-snotting?"

    "Taco-snotting" is the term used by CmdrTaco to refer to the practice of sucking the penis of a homosexual man (or unwilling heterosexual; CmdrTaco is rumored to prefer rape), then blowing the semen out his nose onto his partner's (victim's) face and body. A long, bubbly stream of milky-white semen is left on CmdrTaco's face, dribbling out of his nose and down his cheek: hence the term, "Taco-snotting."
    A "circle-snot" is a Taco-snotting circle-jerk, another practice common among the Slashdot crew. CmdrTaco, CowboiKneel, and Homos get together and Taco-snot each other with their gooey, sticky cum -- spooging their jizz-snot all over each other's faces and pasty, white bodies, until they're covered head to toe with each other's man juice. This can go on for hours. For the homosexual penetration that follows this lengthy foreplay, Roblowme is usually there to provide plenty of anal lubricant; he owns a limo service and has ample supplies of motor oil and axle grease ready to go.
    To complete this perverted orgy, fellow geeks Michael, Timothy, and Jamie will usually join in, dressed in tight leather mock-S.S. uniforms, jack boots, and leather gloves. The whole group then proceeds to snot each other's spunk and whip each other's pudgy asses with riding crops and chains until their pale, white geek bodies are exhausted and soaked in stinking sweat from the hours of passionate, homosexual revelry.

    Ewwwwww. So, can I stop receiving these emails?

    Hopefully.
    You most likely forgot to uncheck the "Willing to Taco-snot" checkbox in your account preferences. CmdrTaco has probably already got the hots for your wad, and he's probably already been lurking outside your bathroom window for weeks with a camera, some tissues and lube. There's no escaping a geek in heat, so it's probably too late for you, but you can possibly rectify this situation. To remove yourself from CmdrTaco's sights, log into your Slashdot account, go to your user page, click on Messages, and uncheck the box next to "Willing to Taco-snot." Maybe he'll ignore you. Probably not.

    I can't stop receiving these emails from CmdrTaco!?

    If you indulge him in a Taco-snot or two, he might leave you alone. You might also want to look into mail filtering, restraining orders, or purchasing a heavy, blunt object capable of warding off rampaging homosexual geeks in heat. Trust me, when they charge... oh, the humanity. If he gets you, and you let him Taco-snot you, you will most likely end up tied up in his basement to be used as his sex slave for the rest of your life (or until he accidentally drowns you in spunk in a circle-snot).

    Have you ever been Taco-Snotted?

    Unfortunately, yes. I first met CmdrTaco at an Open Source Convention. He invited me back to his room for a game of Quake and some "gourmet Tacos," but when I got there, he jumped me and tied me to his bed, stripping me. After taking his "Commander" out of his pants, Mr. Taco made me suck the withered thing six times. He then performed his vile Taco-snotting ritual on me three times over the next two hours, bringing me to orgasm after sweaty, mind-numbing orgasm... then he snotted my own milky-white jizz back onto my face, into my mouth, then again on my exposed belly.
    CmdrTaco invited several of his Open Source (or rather, "Open Sauce" -- man sauce) buddies over to continue the twisted snotfest. Linux Torvalds raped my ass with his "monolithic kernel," and Anal Cox used his "network stack" in a multitude of unspeakable ways on and in every orifice in my defenseless body. Michael was there in his leather Nazi uniform, caning my ass with a bamboo pole and ranting about "all those Censorware freaks out to get him."
    How did you finally escape, you ask? After about 16 hours of countless homosexual atrocities perpetrated against my restrained body, they all finally went to sleep on top of me, sweat-soaked and exhausted. I was left there, covered in bubbly, translucent jizz-snot, chained to the bed, with half a dozen fat, pasty-white fags lying around and on top of me. Fortunately the spooge coating my flesh worked wonderfully as a lubricant; I was able to squirm my way out of the handcuffs and slip out the back door. I'm just glad I survived the ordeal. These geeks had a lot of built-up spunk in their wads -- I could've easily been drowned!

    That's horrible. Does "Taco-snotting" have anything to do with CmdrTaco's "special taco"?

    No, that's a different disgusting perversion CmdrTaco indulges himself in. CmdrTaco is usually not satisfied with merely snotting your own jizz back onto your face, he most often enjoys involving his own bodily fluids in his twisted games. WeatherTroll has spent some time trying to educate the Slashdot readership about this vile practice (emphasis added):
    You may be wondering what CmdrTaco's "special taco" is. You will be wishing that you hadn't been wondering after you finish reading this post. To make his "special taco", CmdrTaco takes a taco shell and shits on it. He then adds lettuce, jacks off on the taco, and adds a compound to make the person who eats the taco unconscious. Of course, the compound does not make the person unconscious until the taco is fully eaten. Thus CmdrTaco force-feeds the taco to the unsuspecting victim.
    After the victim is unconscious, he is held against his will and used for CmdrTaco's nefarious sexual purposes. This includes shoving taco shells up the victim's ass, Taco-snotting, and getting Jon Katz involved.
    Completely different, yet no less revolting. It should be clear to you now that CmdrTaco is a very, very sick individual, as are most of the Slashdot editors.

    Does Jon Katz get involved in any of this? I thought he was a paedophile, not a homosexual.

    Actually, Jon Katz is a homosexual paedophile. He's also a coprophiliac, and, many suspect, a zoophile. Jon Katz is somewhat of a loner and doesn't involve himself in circle-snots. Mr. Katz usually engages in a game called " Katz juicy-douching" with his harem of little-boy slaves: a vile practice which involves administering an enema to himself of the little boy's urine (forced out of them with a pair of pliers), spooging the vile muck from his ass back into the enema bag, then squirting and slathering the goo all over himself, and the little boy's chained-up and naked bodies. If he's in the mood, he will sometimes skip refilling the enema bag and just squirt it from his ass onto his boys. Unwilling boys are further tortured with the pliers until they comply and allow Mr. Katz to juicy-douche them for the rest of their lives.
    As I already said, Mr. Katz is also a zoophile. As if the sexual escapades with the helpless little boys aren't enough, Jon usually enjoys his juicy-douches best when his penis is firmly planted in a female goat's anus. He is also rumoured to get off on watching his little boys eat the goat's small, bean-like turds.

    ...Are you getting hard writing this?

    Why, yes. :) Join me in a WIPO-snot?

    No, thanks. I'm already CmdrTaco's boi toi.

    ________________________________________
    READER COMMENTS

    1. Re:The Taco-Snotting FAQ Rides Again!! (Updated so (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.25 9:14 (#2609574)

      try to find a pic of actual "taco-snotting"! fucking funny it would be! so go to gay porn sites day in and day out until you find a man giving another man a blowjob that has jizz coming out of his nose and mouth. by the way, keep up the good work

    2. Re:Snotting another first!! (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.23 12:18 (#2603370)

      WIPO, this is getting waaaay old, either drop it or revise it.... there've been no updates for days now...

      CmdrTaco

    3. Re:It's Taco SPAM!!! (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.22 17:28 (#2600815)

      A truly excellent and very humourous troll indeed!
      However...

      To complete this perverted orgy, fellow geeks Michael, Timothy, and Jamie often join in, dressed in black Gestapo uniforms, jack boots, and leather gloves.

      Black GeStaPo uniforms? The GeStaPo (Geheime Staatspolizei - Secret State Police) wore civilian clothes (although there are reports on them occasionally using Allgemeine SS uniforms in occupied territories).

      I seriously doubt that perverted individuals like CmdrTaco et al would have the good taste to ever wear the outstandingly beautiful black Waffen SS uniforms! Please update the FAQ accordingly.

      • Re:It's Taco SPAM!!! (Score:0)
        by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.23 4:06 (#2602610)

        Actually, it appears you are both wrong!! Ah ha!! I think our boy WIPO was thinking of the Allgemeine SS uniforms. Waffen SS were grey.

    4. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.21 4:49 (#2594325)

      oh yeah, you say you have masturbated only 2 times to this post. well, by the time it takes for me to get through reading it, i usually end up masturbated 5 to 6 times, 10 to 12 if i have the goatse.cx homepage loaded up and am looking at it side by side with the slashdot page. my keyboard, hands, mouse, monitor, the underside of my desk and around the floor under my desk are cum soaked and sticky with the man smell i know and love.

    5. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.21 4:41 (#2594311)

      for version 2 you should make a total re-write of the cod...errr...text and add some details about cmdrtaco and the homo-gang's happenings with their coworkers (osdn?) and all of the gay revelry they enjoy and promote. by the way, did i just see cmdrtaco on television promoting the nax hair removal system? i guess after using vaseline in and around his ass he grew quite a ponytail and it had to be removed somehow...ouch!

    6. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:-1, Troll)
      by TRoLLaXoR on 2001.11.21 3:59 (#2594191)

      WIPO, do you notice how few comments you get for anything you write/post/spam nowadays?

      -Trollaxor

    7. Jon-Katz docking (Score:-1)
      by sales_worldwide on 2001.11.20 11:53 (#2588488)

      You forgot to mention Jon Katz's "docking" games, where he places his chopper head to head with another chap, and rolls the other guys foreskin over his own circumcised end ("docking"), providing him with fantasies of actually having his own forskin ...
      "Making linux GPL was the best thing I ever did" - Torvalds. I'd hate to see the worst thing...

    8. Re:Snotting a first! (Score:-1)
      by Fucky the troll on 2001.11.20 11:28 (#2588446)

      Woah! When did the WIPO troll get freed? And how the fuck did I miss it?

      Excellent FP, sir.

      This is a sig virus. Please put me in your sig

    9. Re:Snotting a first! (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.20 11:04 (#2588407)

      omg that is crapflooding material if i ever saw it!!!!!! and u got a first post!!!! whoot to the wipo troll!!!

    10. GW, please.... (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.19 9:03 (#2583756)

      GW...you know we love every hair on your 27 acre ass... and I, for one, would never do anything untowards your graceful demeanor. And you probably have several friends that would love to help you do the bear dance all over my face if I so much as spelled your name wrong. And you know I'd defend your Constitutional right to defame God in heaven. I'd even help fund your education, should you ever decide to take that route. Hell, I'd buy you a tall tepid bear-whiz beer if you were here with me, right now!

      But. ...if you can't find another topic, I'm gonna step over your dead mother's grave and kick your assuredly anesthetitized butt clear across the playground.

      Now go stick your shaved head back down inside the woman's toilet, and just to show there's no hard feelings, I'll jump in the tow-truck and drive right over to help you pull it right out...ok?

      thanks

    11. Re:Help me Taco-Snotters!! (Score:-1)
      by mark knopfler 69 on 2001.11.19 8:25 (#2583695)

      I DO NOT BELIEVE YOU SIR. FOR ONE THING, THE E-MAIL FROM CMDRTACO DOES NOT HAVE ENOUGH GRAMMATICAL AND SPELLING MISTAKES. Let's be realistic here, CmdrTaco usually types with one hand, and since he is shaking from jacking off his aim on the keyboard isn't too good. Those e-mails were a little too well written. Sorry boy, you'll have to do better.

    12. Re: What the hell is "taco snotting"? (Score:-1)
      by WeatherTroll on 2001.11.19 8:14 (#2583667)

      You should update this to say VA Software instead of VA Linux.

    13. YOU ARE WINNER (Score:1)
      by smackmonkey on 2001.11.19 7:06 (#2583510)

      Crackhead moderators: this is +5, Hilarious material.

      --
      CNN declares War on Islam!
      Left-wing America declares War on its Civil Liberties!

    14. Re:On Taco-Snotting 1.9 (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.19 5:40 (#2583336)

      This was funny the first 100 times. Now it is getting boring!

    15. Digusting and Shameful (Score:-1)
      by egg troll on 2001.11.18 22:27 (#2582054)

      Having masturbated *twice* to this post, I'm still incredibly aroused! Come over for a Taco Snot. I'll be wearing my crotchless Clifford the Big Red Dog outfit!!

      For more info check out this /. article

    16. IMPROVE THE FAQ (Score:-1, Flamebait)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.18 12:03 (#2580822)

      add more links to goatse and to cowboineal's site to make it better. a link to rotten.com would be nice too

      • Re:IMPROVE THE FAQ (Score:0)
        by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.18 12:18 (#2580832)

        and a link to michael's site and to jon katz's site if he has one and homo's site. i dont know what else to say. maybe a few links to phallic.org they have nice penis pictures! a link to the planet quake site or whatever. really make the reader feel this faq really answers their questions. oh yeah, and when you talk about cmdrtaco snotting you, say he brought you to "orgasm after sweaty orgasm". describe it more is all i'm saying. and use more italics and bolding! and when you talk about jon katz shitting or whatever have a link to fecal japan on rotten.com

        other wise a great job wipo troll! keep up the good work!

    17. Re:CmdrTaco's filthy secret! (Score:-1)
      by Wil Wheaton on 2001.11.18 6:41 (#2580438)

      Hi. Let's be buddies.. butt buddies.
      --
      WIL WHEATON DOT NET

    18. WIPO speaks the truth (Score:-1)
      by dead_puppy on 2001.11.18 5:33 (#2580342)

      Here is an e-mail I received a week ago:

      From: malda@slashdot.org
      To: puppy_dead@hotmail.com
      Subject: were where you last friday? :(

      I thought we where supposed to meet at Backdoor's at 8-ish, sugar-lips? You could've at least told me that you could'nt make it! I was even in my favorite pink skirt for you, honey-cup... next time, you could be more considarite and tell me you cant come... bastard.

      --
      CmdrTaco (malda@slashdot.org)
      You finding Ling-Ling's head?

    19. Taco snotting is WRONG!!! (Score:-1)
      by Big_Ass_Spork on 2001.11.18 4:53 (#2580300)

      I do it wrong

      Laying here in the shadows of my room, I squint up at my love. My Ms. Portman. I am sore and tired after fucking her for eight solid hours. My chapped and aching dick is soaking in grits to relieve the pain. She gets on her knees and starts lapping the grits up out of the bowl. She places her beautiful hands on my penis and starts to lick the grits off my achy piece.

      Massaging my nutsack she....

      WAIT, I DO IT WRONG!!!!

      Yanking my dick out of her mouth I throw her to the ground and shove it in to her gaping freshly fisted ass. [goatse.cx]

      "OH BIG ASS SPORK!! Fuck my ass, fuck my ass good. DEEPER, my stallion, deeper!! Make a Beowulf cluster of sperm on my back!!"

      "Imagine a Beowulf cluster of this baby!"

      I DO IT WRONG!!!!

      ---
      All your Sporks are belong to Big_Ass_Spork! What you say?! All your Sporks are belo... forget it...

    20. Rob Malda Dead at age 25! (Score:-1)
      by j0nkatz on 2001.11.17 22:54 (#2579596)

      I just heard some sad news on the radio -- famous queerbait Rob Malda was found dead in his Holland home this morning. The details were a bit hazy, but it seems that he drowned in jizz while Taco Snotting his friend Hemos. I'm sure everyone in the /. community will miss him -- even if you didn't enjoy his queer antics and boring ass website, there's no denying his contributions to the homosesual cultural development, particularly in the areas of Taco snotting. Truly an American icon.

      I wanna Open Source sex so it won't be worth a shit either.

    21. TACO-SNOTTING is really Donkey-Punching (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.15 6:38 (#2567601)

      No no no, the correct term for that is "donkey-punch". I have eye-witnessed this amazing eye-popping event demonstrated on unsuspecting hose-monsters by my frat brothers in the past.. . :-)

    22. Re:the effect of knowlege laws... (Score:1)
      by AbsoluteRelativity on 2001.11.15 5:31 (#2567457)

      The WIPO Troll
      Slashdot and the Karma Lottery - News for uber monkeys, by uber monkeys.

    23. Re:Taco-Snotting (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.13 9:27 (#2557632)

      Oh, man that's just sick !

    24. HOW DO I GET AN ANONYMOUS PROXY? (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.13 9:03 (#2557604)

      TELL ME WHERE I CAN GET AN ANONYMOUS proxy please WIPO Troll. Maybe later i will join you in a snotting at my place. ;P

    25. Re:Taco-Snottage!?!?!? (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by vikool on 2001.11.13 7:43 (#2557495)

      what is this bull shit,i feel offened that some people feel so so senseless to post stuff like these esp when such a tragic incident has occured

    26. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1)
      by I.T.R.A.R.K. on 2001.11.11 22:38 (#2551890)

      Where the fuck do I sign up?!

      - I throw rocks at retarded kids

      "Adequacy.org: Where congenital stupidity is not an option, but a requirement."

    27. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 21:53 (#2551753)

      this shit is hilarious..keep up the good work.

    28. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by rockwood on 2001.11.11 21:49 (#2551746)

      OMG! That is the most disgusting thing I have ever heard! WHo in their right mind would sit down and waste the time to construct such a replusive story. I guess I'll be skipping lunch and dinner today.. and possibly tomorrow also. The game doesn't affect reality. Reality affects the game.

    29. Re:Ban this! It's disgusting!! (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 14:43 (#2550701)

      dude, this is crap-flood material if i ever saw it.
      duuuuuuuuudddddddddddddeeeeeeeee.

    30. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Flamebait)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 8:16 (#2550266)

      horny_rob_6969@hotmail.com

      Ah, so that's what the alt.binaries.pictures.erotica.horny-rob newsgroup is about!

    31. MOD THIS UP PLEASE!!! (Score:-1)
      by egg troll on 2001.11.11 5:34 (#2550024)

      +5, Arousing

      For more info check out this /. article

    32. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 4:39 (#2549891)

      WINNER>

    33. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 4:37 (#2549887)

      I love you. Why do you use your bitchslapped account, rather than signing up for a new account to post at +1 before getting bitchslapped by the censors here? I guess I should speak for myself, but I don't want to log out and lose all my slashdot customization properties, nor do I want to lose my 50 karma yet.

    34. Re:On Taco-Snotting (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.09 9:19 (#2542412)

      you fucking rock! right down to the expanded cvs id!

      WIPO trolls > linux

    ________________________________________

    $Id: tacosnotting.html,v 1.11 2001/11/25 15:40:22 wipo Exp $
    --

    J. Wipo Troll, Esq.
    Crapflooder Associates
    Slashdot.org

  14. The Specs by The+Gardener · · Score: 2, Redundant

    Since the article is long on hype and thin on substance, here are some details:
    2 NiMH Rechargeable Batteries - Not Removable
    Power Adapter
    USB
    Installation CD

    I don't have the hardware specs on the new "Xtreme", but here is the previous model:

    CYBIKO COMPUTER MODEL CY6411.

    Hardware specifications
    Main Processor: 32 bit, 11 MHz Hitachi H8S/2246
    Coprocessor: Atmel AT90S2313, 4 MHz
    RAM: 512 KB
    Flash disk: 512 KB, extendible up to 1 MB
    LCD display: 160x100 dots, 59x40 mm, 4 level grayscale
    RF transceiver: RF2915
    Expansion cartridge slot: 68-pin
    PC connection socket: RS232 serial port
    Size: 5.7" x 2.8" x 0.86"
    Weight: 4.3 oz
    Software specifications
    Operating System: CyOS v.1.2
    Software: CyOS v.1.2 compatible apps
    Communication Protocol: CyDP x.30 (Cybiko RF Digital Protocol)
    Dynamic Wireless Local Network: automatically provided by CyOS v.1.2 and CyDP x.30
    RF communication features
    Frequency: 902-928 MHz
    Number of channels: 30 digital channels
    Communication Rate: 19200 bps each channel
    Transmission and Receiving Range: 150 ft. indoors, 300 ft. outdoors (environment dependent)
    Max. online Cybiko units: 3000 (100 units on each of 30 channels)

    The Gardener

    --
    --
    1. Re:The Specs by zeno_2 · · Score: 2, Insightful

      I was somewhat disappointed with the article, it has no mention on what the device can actually do. Sure, the buttons here and there are great, yada yada, but what happens when you turn it on?

      From what it sounds like, you can send and recieve text messages between devices, maybe play games, *maybe* send and recieve mp3 files from your friends if you both have that expansion card. Am i missing something? I guess I can say that in the town I live in, I really doubt anyone would have one of these, and those willing would probably rather have one of those motorola 2 way radios, much longer range, and if you just needed to 'talk' to someone else, that would do the trick.

      Ah well, maybe it does some other stuff im not aware of.

    2. Re:The Specs by Levendis23 · · Score: 2, Funny

      Whoa, those things turned on?

    3. Re:The Specs by zeno_2 · · Score: 1

      I guess you would really have no idea if they did or not by reading the article. Maybe they don't and I am just making all that up..

  15. Congratulations... by Psarchasm · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    On hyping yet another product that only supports Windows out of the box. Thus reinforcing the developer mind set of "why bother?"

    And what better place to reinforce that mindset in the consumer than in products built for kids?

    Kudos!

    --
    http://windows.scares.us
  16. original cybiko by mliu · · Score: 5, Informative

    I had one of the original "classic" cybiko's. Why did I have it? Because they gave them away by the boatload in a contest on their website where everyone who signed up won one pretty much. A lot of people who got them took them right back to Best Buy/CompUSA/Staples/Toys R US etc. and got themself a $100 return credit. I wonder how many of these give-aways they're including in the "half a million" they claim they sold.

    That aside, it was really a pretty neat toy for any one in school still. It was no PDA, but it wasn't meant to be one either. They eliminated features that you can live without in a device targeted towards school kids (touch screen, high res screen, size, etc.) and they added some really nice features (wireless networking which could chat, play games, check email, etc). It would supposedly automatically network with nearby Cybiko's so you could chat, and play games with them, and if one of them was plugged into a computer, you could use that one to access the internet to check email and stuff, though I dunno how well these things actually worked as I never met anyone with one besides me.

    I was a little surprised these things didn't catch on more. I'm guessing that's why they gave so many away, because this seems like the sorta thing with a critical mass. On its own, it sucks (not much fun to chat with yourself), but the more people who have it, the better it becomes. Add in the school mentality of the more people who have it, the cooler it becomes as well, and I thought this thing had a lot of potential if they could have gotten the spark started.

    But in their giveaway they screwed up big time by not including an age limit at that time, so the wrong people ended up with these things, and those people took them back to the stores, thus taking away even more sales for them! I'm surprised to see that these guys are still around, I was sure at the time after that mistake, and giving away 1000's of these things that surely they would be just another .com/tech company down the tubes. Their new one seems pretty nice though, the size was one of the kickers with the original, maybe they'll make it this time.

    Though this also seems like exactly the sort of thing where just as it starts to get popular, school administrators will start banning it, so I don't think they're out of the woods yet......

    1. Re:original cybiko by tonywong · · Score: 1

      How did so many people return these things without a receipt?

    2. Re:original cybiko by Junks+Jerzey · · Score: 2

      I was a little surprised these things didn't catch on more

      They *did* catch on in a big way, but the target market is about 4th through 9th grade. 500,000 units in a year is impressive.

    3. Re:original cybiko by Oliver+Wendell+Jones · · Score: 1

      Notice that the original poster said that they returned them for $100 store credit.

      Almost any retailer will take back a product they sell in unopened condition without a receipt for store credit, and for us geeks, $100 store credit at Best Buy or Circuit City is as good as cash... :-)

      --
      A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing -- Emo Phillips
    4. Re:original cybiko by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

      Thats how I got mine. My web site was the second largest referrer of people to Cybiko BTW.

    5. Re:original cybiko by jdoeii · · Score: 1

      > I'm surprised to see that these guys are still
      > around, I was sure at the time after that
      > mistake, and giving away 1000's of these things
      > that surely they would be just
      > another .com/tech company down the tubes.

      It still might happen. We hired quite a few of former Cybiko developers and designers over the last few months. Looks like they are having a massive layoff.

  17. PDA... by don_carnage · · Score: 2, Insightful

    I can't wait for the day when this sort of technology (the ability to communicate with/through other units) comes to the PDA. Palm Pilots and Visors are on just about every desk here at the office and the ability to schedule meetings, send messages and (play games) over wireless would be very useful and widely used.

    --
    Wooden armaments to battle your imaginary foes!
    1. Re:PDA... by Cato · · Score: 3, Informative

      Quite a lot of mobile phones have these features already, at least in Europe - SMS (short message service, aka text messaging) is on every phone, and many phones have two-player games over infrared and calendars. The latest phones, e.g. Ericsson T68, have colour, Bluetooth for syncing and games, and can sync over the GPRS packet network as well.

    2. Re:PDA... by redhog · · Score: 2

      SMS still goes via the masts. What would be übercool would be if the phones could route messages among each other. But that will never happen, as that would ruin the teleco:s buisinesses...

      --
      --The knowledge that you are an idiot, is what distinguishes you from one.
    3. Re:PDA... by Gleef · · Score: 2

      Nextel phones have a Direct Connect feature that bypasses the Cell masts.

      --

      ----
      Open mind, insert foot.
    4. Re:PDA... by jermz · · Score: 1

      Ummm. Not really, from my experience. We had those at a previous job, and the direct connect still had to go through the cell towers.

      I could direct-connect to my boss in .ca.us when I was on vacation in .ut.us. They also track how many conversations you have.

      --
      Hi-Technical Excellent Taste and Flavor!
  18. Uh... by Psarchasm · · Score: 3, Informative

    Specs are on the web site...

    http://www.cybikoxtreme.com/support/specs.asp

    --
    http://windows.scares.us
  19. cyKIBO EXTREME! by xeeno · · Score: -1, Offtopic

    no cheese allowed

    1. Re:cyKIBO EXTREME! by Fucky+the+troll · · Score: -1
      Now would be a good time to jump around like an idiot








      THE OFFICIAL TACO-SNOTTING FAQ [slashdot.org]
      By The WIPO Troll [slashdot.org], $Revision: 1.11 $

      Why have I been receiving emails from CmdrTaco, in which he seems to be speaking in some kind of code language?

      Whenever Rob "CmdrTaco" Malda [cmdrtaco.net] gets bored (and who wouldn't, running a site like Slashdot all day), he roams through the Slashdot database, penis in hand, looking for people who might enjoy engaging in homosexual orgies with him. How he determines this is anyone's guess; but if you have a homosexual-sounding nickname, or a nick with the letter P in it, you're in trouble.
      So this time, he found you. Lucky you.
      CmdrTaco's code language is relatively easy to decipher. He prefers to speak in thinly-veiled sexual innuendo to evade the watchful (but relatively stupid) eye of Slashdot's parent corporation, VA Software [yahoo.com]. CmdrTaco's "Commander" is, of course, his penis -- a small, withered little thing that lives in his pants that only comes out in the presence of other men or at the beck and call of CmdrTaco's own right hand. His "Taco bells" are the shriveled testes that droop beneath his Commander, and his "Taco sauce" is his, well, jizz. It should be more than obvious to you now what he means when he asks you to "ring his Taco bells" or "taste his gourmet Taco sauce."
      Lastly, there is a practice he refers to as "Taco-snotting" and the more shocking "circle-snot."

      Good Lord. What is "Taco-snotting?"

      "Taco-snotting" is the term used by CmdrTaco to refer to the practice of sucking the penis of a homosexual man (or unwilling heterosexual; CmdrTaco is rumored to prefer rape), then blowing the semen out his nose onto his partner's (victim's) face and body. A long, bubbly stream of milky-white semen is left on CmdrTaco's face [yahoo.com], dribbling out of his nose and down his cheek: hence the term, "Taco-snotting."
      A "circle-snot" is a Taco-snotting circle-jerk, another practice common among the Slashdot crew. CmdrTaco, CowboiKneel [yahoo.com], and Homos get together and Taco-snot each other with their gooey, sticky cum -- spooging their jizz-snot all over each other's faces and pasty, white bodies, until they're covered head to toe with each other's man juice. This can go on for hours. For the homosexual penetration that follows this lengthy foreplay, Roblowme is usually there to provide plenty of anal lubricant; he owns a limo service and has ample supplies of motor oil and axle grease ready to go.
      To complete this perverted orgy, fellow geeks Michael, Timothy, and Jamie will usually join in, dressed in tight leather mock-S.S. uniforms, jack boots, and leather gloves. The whole group then proceeds to snot each other's spunk and whip each other's pudgy asses with riding crops and chains until their pale, white geek bodies are exhausted and soaked in stinking sweat from the hours of passionate, homosexual revelry.

      Ewwwwww. So, can I stop receiving these emails?

      Hopefully.
      You most likely forgot to uncheck the "Willing to Taco-snot" checkbox in your account preferences. CmdrTaco has probably already got the hots for your wad, and he's probably already been lurking outside your bathroom window for weeks with a camera, some tissues and lube. There's no escaping a geek in heat, so it's probably too late for you, but you can possibly rectify this situation. To remove yourself from CmdrTaco's sights, log into your Slashdot account, go to your user page, click on Messages, and uncheck the box next to "Willing to Taco-snot." Maybe he'll ignore you. Probably not.

      I can't stop receiving these emails from CmdrTaco!?

      If you indulge him in a Taco-snot or two, he might leave you alone. You might also want to look into mail filtering, restraining orders, or purchasing a heavy, blunt object capable of warding off rampaging homosexual geeks in heat. Trust me, when they charge... oh, the humanity. If he gets you, and you let him Taco-snot you, you will most likely end up tied up in his basement to be used as his sex slave for the rest of your life (or until he accidentally drowns you in spunk in a circle-snot).

      Have you ever been Taco-Snotted?

      Unfortunately, yes. I first met CmdrTaco at an Open Source Convention [yahoo.com]. He invited me back to his room for a game of Quake and some "gourmet Tacos," but when I got there, he jumped me and tied me to his bed, stripping me. After taking his "Commander" out of his pants, Mr. Taco made me suck the withered thing six times. He then performed his vile Taco-snotting ritual on me three times over the next two hours, bringing me to orgasm after sweaty, mind-numbing orgasm... then he snotted my own milky-white jizz back onto my face, into my mouth, then again on my exposed belly.
      CmdrTaco invited several of his Open Source (or rather, "Open Sauce" -- man sauce) buddies over to continue the twisted snotfest. Linux Torvalds raped my ass [yahoo.com] with his "monolithic kernel [yahoo.com]," and Anal Cox used his "network stack" in a multitude of unspeakable ways on and in every orifice in my defenseless body. Michael was there in his leather Nazi uniform, caning my ass with a bamboo pole and ranting about "all those Censorware freaks out to get him."
      How did you finally escape, you ask? After about 16 hours of countless homosexual atrocities perpetrated against my restrained body, they all finally went to sleep on top of me, sweat-soaked and exhausted. I was left there, covered in bubbly, translucent jizz-snot, chained to the bed, with half a dozen fat, pasty-white fags lying around and on top of me. Fortunately the spooge coating my flesh worked wonderfully as a lubricant; I was able to squirm my way out of the handcuffs and slip out the back door. I'm just glad I survived the ordeal. These geeks had a lot of built-up spunk in their wads -- I could've easily been drowned!

      That's horrible. Does "Taco-snotting" have anything to do with CmdrTaco's "special taco"?

      No, that's a different disgusting perversion CmdrTaco indulges himself in. CmdrTaco is usually not satisfied with merely snotting your own jizz back onto your face, he most often enjoys involving his own bodily fluids in his twisted games. WeatherTroll [slashdot.org] has spent some time trying to educate the Slashdot readership about this vile practice (emphasis added):
      You may be wondering what CmdrTaco's "special taco" is. You will be wishing that you hadn't been wondering after you finish reading this post. To make his "special taco", CmdrTaco takes a taco shell and shits on it. He then adds lettuce, jacks off on the taco, and adds a compound to make the person who eats the taco unconscious. Of course, the compound does not make the person unconscious until the taco is fully eaten. Thus CmdrTaco force-feeds the taco to the unsuspecting victim.
      After the victim is unconscious, he is held against his will and used for CmdrTaco's nefarious sexual purposes. This includes shoving taco shells up the victim's ass, Taco-snotting, and getting Jon Katz involved.
      Completely different, yet no less revolting. It should be clear to you now that CmdrTaco is a very, very sick individual, as are most of the Slashdot editors.

      Does Jon Katz get involved in any of this? I thought he was a paedophile, not a homosexual.

      Actually, Jon Katz is a homosexual paedophile. He's also a coprophiliac, and, many suspect, a zoophile. Jon Katz is somewhat of a loner and doesn't involve himself in circle-snots. Mr. Katz usually engages in a game called " Katz juicy-douching [yahoo.com]" with his harem of little-boy slaves: a vile practice which involves administering an enema to himself of the little boy's urine (forced out of them with a pair of pliers), spooging the vile muck from his ass back into the enema bag, then squirting and slathering the goo all over himself, and the little boy's chained-up and naked bodies. If he's in the mood, he will sometimes skip refilling the enema bag and just squirt it from his ass [yahoo.com] onto his boys. Unwilling boys are further tortured with the pliers until they comply and allow Mr. Katz to juicy-douche them for the rest of their lives.
      As I already said, Mr. Katz is also a zoophile. As if the sexual escapades with the helpless little boys aren't enough, Jon usually enjoys his juicy-douches best when his penis is firmly planted in a female goat's anus [yahoo.com]. He is also rumoured to get off on watching his little boys eat the goat's small, bean-like turds.
      --






      Roadkill is yummy.
  20. I will fill this thread with my "taco sauce!" by The+WIPO+Troll · · Score: -1

    THE OFFICIAL TACO-SNOTTING FAQ
    By The WIPO Troll, $Revision: 1.11 $

    Why have I been receiving emails from CmdrTaco, in which he seems to be speaking in some kind of code language?

    Whenever Rob "CmdrTaco" Malda gets bored (and who wouldn't, running a site like Slashdot all day), he roams through the Slashdot database, penis in hand, looking for people who might enjoy engaging in homosexual orgies with him. How he determines this is anyone's guess; but if you have a homosexual-sounding nickname, or a nick with the letter P in it, you're in trouble.
    So this time, he found you. Lucky you.
    CmdrTaco's code language is relatively easy to decipher. He prefers to speak in thinly-veiled sexual innuendo to evade the watchful (but relatively stupid) eye of Slashdot's parent corporation, VA Software. CmdrTaco's "Commander" is, of course, his penis -- a small, withered little thing that lives in his pants that only comes out in the presence of other men or at the beck and call of CmdrTaco's own right hand. His "Taco bells" are the shriveled testes that droop beneath his Commander, and his "Taco sauce" is his, well, jizz. It should be more than obvious to you now what he means when he asks you to "ring his Taco bells" or "taste his gourmet Taco sauce."
    Lastly, there is a practice he refers to as "Taco-snotting" and the more shocking "circle-snot."

    Good Lord. What is "Taco-snotting?"

    "Taco-snotting" is the term used by CmdrTaco to refer to the practice of sucking the penis of a homosexual man (or unwilling heterosexual; CmdrTaco is rumored to prefer rape), then blowing the semen out his nose onto his partner's (victim's) face and body. A long, bubbly stream of milky-white semen is left on CmdrTaco's face, dribbling out of his nose and down his cheek: hence the term, "Taco-snotting."
    A "circle-snot" is a Taco-snotting circle-jerk, another practice common among the Slashdot crew. CmdrTaco, CowboiKneel, and Homos get together and Taco-snot each other with their gooey, sticky cum -- spooging their jizz-snot all over each other's faces and pasty, white bodies, until they're covered head to toe with each other's man juice. This can go on for hours. For the homosexual penetration that follows this lengthy foreplay, Roblowme is usually there to provide plenty of anal lubricant; he owns a limo service and has ample supplies of motor oil and axle grease ready to go.
    To complete this perverted orgy, fellow geeks Michael, Timothy, and Jamie will usually join in, dressed in tight leather mock-S.S. uniforms, jack boots, and leather gloves. The whole group then proceeds to snot each other's spunk and whip each other's pudgy asses with riding crops and chains until their pale, white geek bodies are exhausted and soaked in stinking sweat from the hours of passionate, homosexual revelry.

    Ewwwwww. So, can I stop receiving these emails?

    Hopefully.
    You most likely forgot to uncheck the "Willing to Taco-snot" checkbox in your account preferences. CmdrTaco has probably already got the hots for your wad, and he's probably already been lurking outside your bathroom window for weeks with a camera, some tissues and lube. There's no escaping a geek in heat, so it's probably too late for you, but you can possibly rectify this situation. To remove yourself from CmdrTaco's sights, log into your Slashdot account, go to your user page, click on Messages, and uncheck the box next to "Willing to Taco-snot." Maybe he'll ignore you. Probably not.

    I can't stop receiving these emails from CmdrTaco!?

    If you indulge him in a Taco-snot or two, he might leave you alone. You might also want to look into mail filtering, restraining orders, or purchasing a heavy, blunt object capable of warding off rampaging homosexual geeks in heat. Trust me, when they charge... oh, the humanity. If he gets you, and you let him Taco-snot you, you will most likely end up tied up in his basement to be used as his sex slave for the rest of your life (or until he accidentally drowns you in spunk in a circle-snot).

    Have you ever been Taco-Snotted?

    Unfortunately, yes. I first met CmdrTaco at an Open Source Convention. He invited me back to his room for a game of Quake and some "gourmet Tacos," but when I got there, he jumped me and tied me to his bed, stripping me. After taking his "Commander" out of his pants, Mr. Taco made me suck the withered thing six times. He then performed his vile Taco-snotting ritual on me three times over the next two hours, bringing me to orgasm after sweaty, mind-numbing orgasm... then he snotted my own milky-white jizz back onto my face, into my mouth, then again on my exposed belly.
    CmdrTaco invited several of his Open Source (or rather, "Open Sauce" -- man sauce) buddies over to continue the twisted snotfest. Linux Torvalds raped my ass with his "monolithic kernel," and Anal Cox used his "network stack" in a multitude of unspeakable ways on and in every orifice in my defenseless body. Michael was there in his leather Nazi uniform, caning my ass with a bamboo pole and ranting about "all those Censorware freaks out to get him."
    How did you finally escape, you ask? After about 16 hours of countless homosexual atrocities perpetrated against my restrained body, they all finally went to sleep on top of me, sweat-soaked and exhausted. I was left there, covered in bubbly, translucent jizz-snot, chained to the bed, with half a dozen fat, pasty-white fags lying around and on top of me. Fortunately the spooge coating my flesh worked wonderfully as a lubricant; I was able to squirm my way out of the handcuffs and slip out the back door. I'm just glad I survived the ordeal. These geeks had a lot of built-up spunk in their wads -- I could've easily been drowned!

    That's horrible. Does "Taco-snotting" have anything to do with CmdrTaco's "special taco"?

    No, that's a different disgusting perversion CmdrTaco indulges himself in. CmdrTaco is usually not satisfied with merely snotting your own jizz back onto your face, he most often enjoys involving his own bodily fluids in his twisted games. WeatherTroll has spent some time trying to educate the Slashdot readership about this vile practice (emphasis added):
    You may be wondering what CmdrTaco's "special taco" is. You will be wishing that you hadn't been wondering after you finish reading this post. To make his "special taco", CmdrTaco takes a taco shell and shits on it. He then adds lettuce, jacks off on the taco, and adds a compound to make the person who eats the taco unconscious. Of course, the compound does not make the person unconscious until the taco is fully eaten. Thus CmdrTaco force-feeds the taco to the unsuspecting victim.
    After the victim is unconscious, he is held against his will and used for CmdrTaco's nefarious sexual purposes. This includes shoving taco shells up the victim's ass, Taco-snotting, and getting Jon Katz involved.
    Completely different, yet no less revolting. It should be clear to you now that CmdrTaco is a very, very sick individual, as are most of the Slashdot editors.

    Does Jon Katz get involved in any of this? I thought he was a paedophile, not a homosexual.

    Actually, Jon Katz is a homosexual paedophile. He's also a coprophiliac, and, many suspect, a zoophile. Jon Katz is somewhat of a loner and doesn't involve himself in circle-snots. Mr. Katz usually engages in a game called " Katz juicy-douching" with his harem of little-boy slaves: a vile practice which involves administering an enema to himself of the little boy's urine (forced out of them with a pair of pliers), spooging the vile muck from his ass back into the enema bag, then squirting and slathering the goo all over himself, and the little boy's chained-up and naked bodies. If he's in the mood, he will sometimes skip refilling the enema bag and just squirt it from his ass onto his boys. Unwilling boys are further tortured with the pliers until they comply and allow Mr. Katz to juicy-douche them for the rest of their lives.
    As I already said, Mr. Katz is also a zoophile. As if the sexual escapades with the helpless little boys aren't enough, Jon usually enjoys his juicy-douches best when his penis is firmly planted in a female goat's anus. He is also rumoured to get off on watching his little boys eat the goat's small, bean-like turds.

    ...Are you getting hard writing this?

    Why, yes. :) Join me in a WIPO-snot?

    No, thanks. I'm already CmdrTaco's boi toi.

    ________________________________________
    READER COMMENTS

    1. Re:The Taco-Snotting FAQ Rides Again!! (Updated so (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.25 9:14 (#2609574)

      try to find a pic of actual "taco-snotting"! fucking funny it would be! so go to gay porn sites day in and day out until you find a man giving another man a blowjob that has jizz coming out of his nose and mouth. by the way, keep up the good work

    2. Re:Snotting another first!! (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.23 12:18 (#2603370)

      WIPO, this is getting waaaay old, either drop it or revise it.... there've been no updates for days now...

      CmdrTaco

    3. Re:It's Taco SPAM!!! (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.22 17:28 (#2600815)

      A truly excellent and very humourous troll indeed!
      However...

      To complete this perverted orgy, fellow geeks Michael, Timothy, and Jamie often join in, dressed in black Gestapo uniforms, jack boots, and leather gloves.

      Black GeStaPo uniforms? The GeStaPo (Geheime Staatspolizei - Secret State Police) wore civilian clothes (although there are reports on them occasionally using Allgemeine SS uniforms in occupied territories).

      I seriously doubt that perverted individuals like CmdrTaco et al would have the good taste to ever wear the outstandingly beautiful black Waffen SS uniforms! Please update the FAQ accordingly.

      • Re:It's Taco SPAM!!! (Score:0)
        by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.23 4:06 (#2602610)

        Actually, it appears you are both wrong!! Ah ha!! I think our boy WIPO was thinking of the Allgemeine SS uniforms. Waffen SS were grey.

    4. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.21 4:49 (#2594325)

      oh yeah, you say you have masturbated only 2 times to this post. well, by the time it takes for me to get through reading it, i usually end up masturbated 5 to 6 times, 10 to 12 if i have the goatse.cx homepage loaded up and am looking at it side by side with the slashdot page. my keyboard, hands, mouse, monitor, the underside of my desk and around the floor under my desk are cum soaked and sticky with the man smell i know and love.

    5. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.21 4:41 (#2594311)

      for version 2 you should make a total re-write of the cod...errr...text and add some details about cmdrtaco and the homo-gang's happenings with their coworkers (osdn?) and all of the gay revelry they enjoy and promote. by the way, did i just see cmdrtaco on television promoting the nax hair removal system? i guess after using vaseline in and around his ass he grew quite a ponytail and it had to be removed somehow...ouch!

    6. Re:Microsoft's Taco-Snotting Connection (Score:-1, Troll)
      by TRoLLaXoR on 2001.11.21 3:59 (#2594191)

      WIPO, do you notice how few comments you get for anything you write/post/spam nowadays?

      -Trollaxor

    7. Jon-Katz docking (Score:-1)
      by sales_worldwide on 2001.11.20 11:53 (#2588488)

      You forgot to mention Jon Katz's "docking" games, where he places his chopper head to head with another chap, and rolls the other guys foreskin over his own circumcised end ("docking"), providing him with fantasies of actually having his own forskin ...
      "Making linux GPL was the best thing I ever did" - Torvalds. I'd hate to see the worst thing...

    8. Re:Snotting a first! (Score:-1)
      by Fucky the troll on 2001.11.20 11:28 (#2588446)

      Woah! When did the WIPO troll get freed? And how the fuck did I miss it?

      Excellent FP, sir.

      This is a sig virus. Please put me in your sig

    9. Re:Snotting a first! (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.20 11:04 (#2588407)

      omg that is crapflooding material if i ever saw it!!!!!! and u got a first post!!!! whoot to the wipo troll!!!

    10. GW, please.... (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.19 9:03 (#2583756)

      GW...you know we love every hair on your 27 acre ass... and I, for one, would never do anything untowards your graceful demeanor. And you probably have several friends that would love to help you do the bear dance all over my face if I so much as spelled your name wrong. And you know I'd defend your Constitutional right to defame God in heaven. I'd even help fund your education, should you ever decide to take that route. Hell, I'd buy you a tall tepid bear-whiz beer if you were here with me, right now!

      But. ...if you can't find another topic, I'm gonna step over your dead mother's grave and kick your assuredly anesthetitized butt clear across the playground.

      Now go stick your shaved head back down inside the woman's toilet, and just to show there's no hard feelings, I'll jump in the tow-truck and drive right over to help you pull it right out...ok?

      thanks

    11. Re:Help me Taco-Snotters!! (Score:-1)
      by mark knopfler 69 on 2001.11.19 8:25 (#2583695)

      I DO NOT BELIEVE YOU SIR. FOR ONE THING, THE E-MAIL FROM CMDRTACO DOES NOT HAVE ENOUGH GRAMMATICAL AND SPELLING MISTAKES. Let's be realistic here, CmdrTaco usually types with one hand, and since he is shaking from jacking off his aim on the keyboard isn't too good. Those e-mails were a little too well written. Sorry boy, you'll have to do better.

    12. Re: What the hell is "taco snotting"? (Score:-1)
      by WeatherTroll on 2001.11.19 8:14 (#2583667)

      You should update this to say VA Software instead of VA Linux.

    13. YOU ARE WINNER (Score:1)
      by smackmonkey on 2001.11.19 7:06 (#2583510)

      Crackhead moderators: this is +5, Hilarious material.

      --
      CNN declares War on Islam!
      Left-wing America declares War on its Civil Liberties!

    14. Re:On Taco-Snotting 1.9 (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.19 5:40 (#2583336)

      This was funny the first 100 times. Now it is getting boring!

    15. Digusting and Shameful (Score:-1)
      by egg troll on 2001.11.18 22:27 (#2582054)

      Having masturbated *twice* to this post, I'm still incredibly aroused! Come over for a Taco Snot. I'll be wearing my crotchless Clifford the Big Red Dog outfit!!

      For more info check out this /. article

    16. IMPROVE THE FAQ (Score:-1, Flamebait)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.18 12:03 (#2580822)

      add more links to goatse and to cowboineal's site to make it better. a link to rotten.com would be nice too

      • Re:IMPROVE THE FAQ (Score:0)
        by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.18 12:18 (#2580832)

        and a link to michael's site and to jon katz's site if he has one and homo's site. i dont know what else to say. maybe a few links to phallic.org they have nice penis pictures! a link to the planet quake site or whatever. really make the reader feel this faq really answers their questions. oh yeah, and when you talk about cmdrtaco snotting you, say he brought you to "orgasm after sweaty orgasm". describe it more is all i'm saying. and use more italics and bolding! and when you talk about jon katz shitting or whatever have a link to fecal japan on rotten.com

        other wise a great job wipo troll! keep up the good work!

    17. Re:CmdrTaco's filthy secret! (Score:-1)
      by Wil Wheaton on 2001.11.18 6:41 (#2580438)

      Hi. Let's be buddies.. butt buddies.
      --
      WIL WHEATON DOT NET

    18. WIPO speaks the truth (Score:-1)
      by dead_puppy on 2001.11.18 5:33 (#2580342)

      Here is an e-mail I received a week ago:

      From: malda@slashdot.org
      To: puppy_dead@hotmail.com
      Subject: were where you last friday? :(

      I thought we where supposed to meet at Backdoor's at 8-ish, sugar-lips? You could've at least told me that you could'nt make it! I was even in my favorite pink skirt for you, honey-cup... next time, you could be more considarite and tell me you cant come... bastard.

      --
      CmdrTaco (malda@slashdot.org)
      You finding Ling-Ling's head?

    19. Taco snotting is WRONG!!! (Score:-1)
      by Big_Ass_Spork on 2001.11.18 4:53 (#2580300)

      I do it wrong

      Laying here in the shadows of my room, I squint up at my love. My Ms. Portman. I am sore and tired after fucking her for eight solid hours. My chapped and aching dick is soaking in grits to relieve the pain. She gets on her knees and starts lapping the grits up out of the bowl. She places her beautiful hands on my penis and starts to lick the grits off my achy piece.

      Massaging my nutsack she....

      WAIT, I DO IT WRONG!!!!

      Yanking my dick out of her mouth I throw her to the ground and shove it in to her gaping freshly fisted ass. [goatse.cx]

      "OH BIG ASS SPORK!! Fuck my ass, fuck my ass good. DEEPER, my stallion, deeper!! Make a Beowulf cluster of sperm on my back!!"

      "Imagine a Beowulf cluster of this baby!"

      I DO IT WRONG!!!!

      ---
      All your Sporks are belong to Big_Ass_Spork! What you say?! All your Sporks are belo... forget it...

    20. Rob Malda Dead at age 25! (Score:-1)
      by j0nkatz on 2001.11.17 22:54 (#2579596)

      I just heard some sad news on the radio -- famous queerbait Rob Malda was found dead in his Holland home this morning. The details were a bit hazy, but it seems that he drowned in jizz while Taco Snotting his friend Hemos. I'm sure everyone in the /. community will miss him -- even if you didn't enjoy his queer antics and boring ass website, there's no denying his contributions to the homosesual cultural development, particularly in the areas of Taco snotting. Truly an American icon.

      I wanna Open Source sex so it won't be worth a shit either.

    21. TACO-SNOTTING is really Donkey-Punching (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.15 6:38 (#2567601)

      No no no, the correct term for that is "donkey-punch". I have eye-witnessed this amazing eye-popping event demonstrated on unsuspecting hose-monsters by my frat brothers in the past.. . :-)

    22. Re:the effect of knowlege laws... (Score:1)
      by AbsoluteRelativity on 2001.11.15 5:31 (#2567457)

      The WIPO Troll
      Slashdot and the Karma Lottery - News for uber monkeys, by uber monkeys.

    23. Re:Taco-Snotting (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.13 9:27 (#2557632)

      Oh, man that's just sick !

    24. HOW DO I GET AN ANONYMOUS PROXY? (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.13 9:03 (#2557604)

      TELL ME WHERE I CAN GET AN ANONYMOUS proxy please WIPO Troll. Maybe later i will join you in a snotting at my place. ;P

    25. Re:Taco-Snottage!?!?!? (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by vikool on 2001.11.13 7:43 (#2557495)

      what is this bull shit,i feel offened that some people feel so so senseless to post stuff like these esp when such a tragic incident has occured

    26. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1)
      by I.T.R.A.R.K. on 2001.11.11 22:38 (#2551890)

      Where the fuck do I sign up?!

      - I throw rocks at retarded kids

      "Adequacy.org: Where congenital stupidity is not an option, but a requirement."

    27. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1, Troll)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 21:53 (#2551753)

      this shit is hilarious..keep up the good work.

    28. Re:Taco-felching!! (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by rockwood on 2001.11.11 21:49 (#2551746)

      OMG! That is the most disgusting thing I have ever heard! WHo in their right mind would sit down and waste the time to construct such a replusive story. I guess I'll be skipping lunch and dinner today.. and possibly tomorrow also. The game doesn't affect reality. Reality affects the game.

    29. Re:Ban this! It's disgusting!! (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 14:43 (#2550701)

      dude, this is crap-flood material if i ever saw it.
      duuuuuuuuudddddddddddddeeeeeeeee.

    30. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Flamebait)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 8:16 (#2550266)

      horny_rob_6969@hotmail.com

      Ah, so that's what the alt.binaries.pictures.erotica.horny-rob newsgroup is about!

    31. MOD THIS UP PLEASE!!! (Score:-1)
      by egg troll on 2001.11.11 5:34 (#2550024)

      +5, Arousing

      For more info check out this /. article

    32. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 4:39 (#2549891)

      WINNER>

    33. Re:Taco-Snotting = HATE SPEECH (Score:-1, Offtopic)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.11 4:37 (#2549887)

      I love you. Why do you use your bitchslapped account, rather than signing up for a new account to post at +1 before getting bitchslapped by the censors here? I guess I should speak for myself, but I don't want to log out and lose all my slashdot customization properties, nor do I want to lose my 50 karma yet.

    34. Re:On Taco-Snotting (Score:0)
      by Anonymous Coward on 2001.11.09 9:19 (#2542412)

      you fucking rock! right down to the expanded cvs id!

      WIPO trolls > linux

    ________________________________________

    $Id: tacosnotting.html,v 1.11 2001/11/25 15:40:22 wipo Exp $
    --

    J. Wipo Troll, Esq.
    Crapflooder Associates
    Slashdot.org

  21. Cybiko == AOL by mshiltonj · · Score: 4, Interesting

    Don't forget, AOL is directing the development of the Cybiko. The Cybiko will be AOL's Palm Pilot.

    Look away from the light.

    --
    Software Wars
  22. Bul Dell !! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Offtopic
    I'm advocating the purchase of DELL computers, don't be tricked into buying any other brand.

    Visit their website today !!!

  23. mandatory statement... by Hadlock · · Score: 0, Offtopic

    imagine a beowulf cluster of these!....for..uh, cheating on tests?

    --
    moox. for a new generation.
  24. Cybiko Extreme Website by Chanc_Gorkon · · Score: 2

    Said you can now get a MP3 player with purchase of a cybiko extreme. It plugs into the expansion slot. It also adds the SD/MMC slot and can take cards of any size. Not a bad idea to get sales going! The more Cybiko's the better.

    --

    Gorkman

  25. Weapon for terrorists ? by Krapangor · · Score: 1, Funny

    With these PDA-alikes becoming more and more powerful, I wonder if these couldn't be used as a weapon for cyberterrorism/espionage.
    Let's see you have a small, decent computer. Networking capabilities. Easily hidden and, hey, would anyone expect an assault from these things ?
    The keyboard comes in handy for mission critical scripting etc.
    Just go into desired building, h4x0r their nets (or aquire confidential data - when you are working for govermental bodies) and leave.
    And you'll get away because noone will notice that YOU did anything. Might work with laptops, too, but laptops are more difficult to hide and may raise suspicion.

    --
    Owner of a Mensa membership card.
    1. Re:Weapon for terrorists ? by Xawen · · Score: 2, Funny

      Damn, now that you're onto us, we'll have to start encrypting those major business networks that run on Cybiko power! The world is no longer a safe place! Hackers now have small devices capable of sending wireless signals....

  26. How hackable are these suckers? by Molech · · Score: 1

    A quick perusal of their website doesn't reveal any thing that would allow someone do their own coding. Toys like this are only worth having if they are hackable :). Anyone know of any projects to hack them or provide dev. tools. Heck does any SELL dev tools for the sucker?

    1. Re:How hackable are these suckers? by Junks+Jerzey · · Score: 5, Informative

      A quick perusal of their website doesn't reveal any thing that would allow someone do their own coding. Toys like this are only worth having if they are hackable :). Anyone know of any projects to hack them or provide dev. tools.

      You can get the development tools and documentation from the Cybiko web site. They've been available for free right from the start.

    2. Re:How hackable are these suckers? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Interesting

      I'm thinking these would make either a good portable point-of-sale device, or inventory device. Just add on a USB barcode scanner and you are all set to sell products -- wirelessly!

    3. Re:How hackable are these suckers? by faedle · · Score: 1
      Boy, you sure didn't look very hard. There's a real easy to find "Developers" section that has all you need, and need to know, to write software for the Cybikos. That's been the great hallmark of the Cybikos from the beginning: a fairly open SDK.

      There are limits to what you can do with the free SDK (they don't allow you to sell applets made with the free one), but it works, and it's real easy to create stuff for the Cyb.

      I keep thinking to myself: frotz port.. frotz port.. frotz port..

    4. Re:How hackable are these suckers? by nica · · Score: 1

      Peruse http://www.devrs.com/cybiko/

      My guess is this is mostly for the original Cybiko, but I would suspect that much of the information will apply to the new Cybiko.

  27. Resemblence... by Ando[evilmedic] · · Score: 1

    Anybody else thinking...graphing calulcator?

    Look at the shape of it. And where the buttons are placed, and the screen itself.

    1. Re:Resemblence... by doofsmack · · Score: 1

      I have a "Cybiko Classic." To put it frankly, the graphing calc program for it really sucks.
      Unless:
      a) They re-made it (doesn't look like it)
      or
      b) You want to code your own

      ...you're pretty much out of luck

  28. Wil Wheaton says : "FEAR NO MAN!" by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Troll
    Learn The Secrets Of LLAP-GOCH!

    I'll make you a MASTER of LLAP-GOCH,... the Secret Welsh ART of SELF DEFENSE that requires NO INTELLIGENCE, STRENGTH or PHYSICAL courage. The FANTASTIC SECRETS of the SECRET world-famous method of SELF DEFENSE, kept secret for centuries because of their DEADLY POWER to MAIM, KILL, SMASH, BATTER, FRACTURE, CRUSH, DISMEMBER, CRACK, DISEMBOWEL, CRIPPLE, SNAP and HARM are now revealed to YOU in the English Language by a LLAP-GOCH master AT HIS OWN RISK, PROVIDED you promise to MAIM, CRUSH, DISEMBOWEL and so on ONLY IN SELF DEFENSE. (This is just to cover ourselves, as you will understand.)

    WHY "At his own risk?"
    BECAUSE if his fellow masters of LLAP-GOCH DISCOVER his IDENTITY, they will PUNISH HIM SEVERELY for revealing the DEADLY secrets he had promised to keep SECRET, without giving them a piece of the ACTION, and also BECAUSE of the TERRIBLE risk of PUNISHMENT he runs under the Trades Description Act.

    WHAT is LLAP-GOCH?
    IT is THE most DEADLY form of SECRET self-DEFENSE that HAS ever been widely advertised and available to EVERYONE.

    WHY ALL the CAPITALS?
    Because THE most likely kind OF person TO answer THIS sort OF advertisement HAS less trouble under-STANDING words if they ARE written in BIG letters.

    WHAT is LLAP-GOCH again?
    It is the ANCIENT Welsh ART based on a BRILLIANTLY simple I-D-E-A, which is a SECRET. The best form of DEFENSE is ATTACK (just ask the Pentagon!) and the most VITAL element of ATTACK is SURPRISE. Therefore, the BEST way to protect yourself AGAINST any ASSAILANT is to ATTACK him before he attacks YOU... Or BETTER... BEFORE the THOUGHT of doing so has EVEN OCCURRED TO HIM!!! SO YOU MAY BE ABLE TO RENDER YOUR ASSAILANT UNCONSCIOUS BEFORE he is EVEN aware of your very existence!
    No longer need you feel WEAK, helpless, INDECISIVE, NOT fascinating and ASHAMED of your genital dimensions. No more need you be out-maneuvered in political debate! GOODBYE HUMILIATION, wisecracking bullies, Karate experts, boxing champions, sarcastic traffic cops; entire Panzer divisions will melt to pulp as you master every situation without INADEQUACY. PROTECT YOUR LOVED ONES. You will no longer look pitiful and wimpy to your GIRL FRIENDS when you leave some unsuspecting passerby looking like so much cat food! They will admire your MASTERY and DECISIVENESS and LACK OF INADEQUACY and will almost certainly let you put your HAND inside their BLOUSE out of sheer ADMIRATION. And after seeing more of your expert disabling they'll almost definitely go to bed with you, although obviously we can't ABSOLUTELY guarantee this, still it's extremely likely and would make learning LLAP-GOCH really worthwhile although legally we can't PROMISE anything.

    HOW do I learn?
    You receive ABSOLUTELY FREE your own special personal LLAP-GOCH Picture Book with hundreds of PHOTOGRAPHS and just a very few plain, clear and simple, easy to understand words. Only a FOUR-SECOND WORKOUT Each Day! And you will be ready to HARM people!

    DEVELOP UP TO 38" BICEPS
    GROW UP TO 12" TALLER
    LOSE UP TO 40 POUNDS OF FAT IN YOUR FIRST WORK-OUT!
    GO TO BED WITH UP TO ANY LUDICROUS NUMBER OF GIRLS YOU CARE TO THINK OF PROVIDING YOU REALIZE THIS STATEMENT IS QUITE MEANINGLESS AS THE PHRASE "UP TO" CLEARLY INCLUDES THE NUMBER "ZERO."

    WHAT Does it Cost?
    This, like LLAP-GOCH, is a SECRET but you will find out sooner or later, don't worry. MAIL DARING HAIR-RAISING MONEY-SAVING HALF-PRICE NO-RISK FREE-TRIAL COUPON NOW!


    O.K. Honourable Master, I accept your daring, hair-raising, mind-boggling, blood-curdling, no-risk, half-price, free-trial offer to reveal the secrets of LLAP-GOCH in a plain brown wrapper at once. Yes, Master, I never again want to be 'Weak In The Knees' and 'Chicken Out' and 'Wet My Pants' when insulted and attacked. I agree never to abuse the principles of LLAP-GOCH or consult a lawyer. I am over 4. I have an extra Y chromosome. Bill me later. I understand that if I am not completely satisfied then I have been had.

    • NAME _____________________ AGE__ ADDRESS____________________
    • CITY___________________ STATE____________ ZIP _____________
    Please also enroll me under your special Car Insurance Scheme. I understand that I do not have to sign anything to make this completely binding to me.
  29. Nifty little gadget. by Proteus+Child · · Score: 0
    I've been eyeing these for a while but havn't plunked down the dollars to pick one up - I use my Palm too much to justify getting yet another PDA. But this looks like it could be fun. It reminds me a little bit of the Apple Newtons in terms of gadget factor; it also reminds me of the pocket-NAVIs from Serial Experiments Lain. I think I might put one of these on my wishlist for Christmas this year.. purely for experimental purposes, mind you...

    Now where did I put my radio scanner...?

    --

    Proteus' Child

    Doko ni datte; hito wa, tsunagette iru.

  30. Can we put Linux on it? by yatest5 · · Score: 0, Redundant

    Imagine a beowulf cluster of those!!!

    --
    • Mod parent up! [a] by Anonymous Coward (Score:5) Thurs, June 31, @13:37
  31. Links by doofsmack · · Score: 4, Informative

    I used to be active in the cybiko community. Here are some links:
    www.cybla.com
    www.cybimunk.com
    www.devcybiko.com

    Hope you find these useful

  32. Cybikos have Gaydar by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    The Cybiko lets you specify your sexual preferences and the unit will emit a low frequency tremor (like a page) when others with the same sexual preferences come near you. IT'S GAYDAR! No this is not a joke!

  33. CYIaBCoX SUYA?!!! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: -1, Troll

    &ltVoiceover="Tom Sellek"&gt
    Can. You. Imagine...
    a Beowulf cluster of Cybikos running Linux...
    &ltVoiceover="Tom Sellek", mood=enraged&gt
    SHOVED&nbspUP&nbspYOUR&nbspASS?!!!!
    &lt/voiceover &gt

  34. skeptical by British · · Score: 2

    I'm a bit skeptical about this. I had the VTech "phones" expecting to talk with all sorts of people and exchanging voice mail with other people, but upon buying 2 of them, I quickly realized they had almost NO range whatsoever. Boy did I feel ripped off.

  35. 1 good thing by Zerth · · Score: 1

    And the best thing about the new cybiko is that the market for the old ones have dropped like a rock. I've had one of the old ones for awhile now, and they are fairly nifty(you can get a C devkit and write you own tools). You can only get the MP3 player for the old one second hand but it is pretty good.($20 cybiko, $40 mp3, $40 memory upgrade=$100 mp3player+wireless). Now that they are going for so cheap, I think I'll finally buy a few extras so I can set up a WAP gateway for mine.

    Although, the new one's look like they are barely worth it, if the keypad is truly better... The #1 crappy thing about the old cybiko was the POS 1 piece rubber keypad.

    Oh, and if anyone actually paid the quoted price of $150, they were suckers. They had a 2 for $100 deal for quite awhile, when you could sell the second on ebay for $60-80

  36. Ham Radio possibilities by phil+reed · · Score: 1

    These things work right smack in the middle of the 902-928 MHz Ham radio band (it's a shared allocation). There are a number of ham radio folks looking at boosting the power and modifying the antenna system (legal to do only if you have a Tech or higher ham license). It shouldn't be too difficult to pump the power up to the point where the usable range is something on the order of a mile or so. Then, things ought to start getting interesting.

    --

    ...phil
    "For a list of the ways which technology has failed to improve our quality of life, press 3."
    1. Re:Ham Radio possibilities by nofx_3 · · Score: 1

      Wow, this would be pretty awsome. Would it be for the new units or the old? I go to a university and my house is within a mile of everything on campus and our college community. I also have a broadband connection. Does this mean that if I was able to set one up at my house I could get email anywhere in the area? Unlimited wireless email access for a one time fee of $60 (2 cybiko classics). Now that would be cool.

      --
      Visualize Whirled Peas
    2. Re:Ham Radio possibilities by phil+reed · · Score: 1

      Probably couldn't use the ham license for this app, since there are commercial and content restrictions on ham radio. I'd recommend getting some kind of ethernet wireless bridge and directional antennas.

      --

      ...phil
      "For a list of the ways which technology has failed to improve our quality of life, press 3."
  37. as much as it hurts by minus_273 · · Score: 0

    to say this, nothing compares to a pocket PC... sad but true, as far as capabilities and bang for the buck go.. they blow everything away, an $150 Ipq from amazon will blow anything else in its range from anyoneelse away as far as the processor and memory is concerned..

    rather than this, you should get an ipaq ..

    --
    The war with islam is a war on the beast
    The war on terror is a war for peace
  38. Important things not covered.. by Lumpy · · Score: 3, Interesting

    Are these "compatable" with the older cybiko?
    Specifically in wireless connectivity and data sharing.

    That is a very important issue.

    --
    Do not look at laser with remaining good eye.
    1. Re:Important things not covered.. by doofsmack · · Score: 1

      Yes. http://www.cybimunk.com/VirtualPage.asp?NewsID=169
      (a good review, with lots of screenshots)

  39. Cybiko Xtremes by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    Imagine a Beowolf Cluster of THESE!!!

  40. Re:original cybiko-Banned in 5th grade by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0

    My daughter wants only this for Christmas this year. While her school has BANNED the Cybiko, her CLASS is allowed to bring them in and use them.

    WHY?

    Because her teacher has one!!

    Seriously, she is in the "techie" class--they have one Dell OptiPlex per 4 kids. They are learning basic html and the Microsoft office suite along with the regular 5th grade curriculum.

    She will be the first one with the Xtreme--most of the kids have the regular Cybiko. They have been on sale locally for around $40, so a bunch of parents picked them up.

  41. I predicted this... by Richy_T · · Score: 2

    I bought a couple of Cybikos a year ago. I felt that they were actually pretty good value for the money but I could see where there were some shortfalls and I predicted that it wouldn't be long before they released a new version with some of the better features. Cybiko denied they had anything planned and a lot of people said it wouldn't happen but *smug*.

    Seriously though, these are cool devices. The SDK is open and free although documentation was a little lacking last time I checked. There is a whole host of games and apps for them (as with the palm) and a thriving developer community. Also, one of the coolest things is that if you have two of these things, you can use one as a tunnel, connect to your PC and have wireless internet on the other one.

    I was planning on writing some apps for mine but unfortunately, events overtook me this year. Now they have this new one out, I shall have to have another look (I hope the Xtreme has a serial port like the classic)

    Rich

  42. Investment != Control by fm6 · · Score: 3, Informative

    Before you jump to any conclusions as to who "controls" Cybiko, find out all the investors, who owns what percent, and what shares have voting rights.

  43. Article has a fact wrong by Cheetah86 · · Score: 1

    The article repeatedly states that the cybiko came out a year ago. I remember two years ago when I saw someone playing on one though.

  44. Two things.... by azephrahel · · Score: 1

    One, what's inside it? I dind't see processor or memeory specs on that site..

    Two, I tried to look for that info on
    cybico's us website
    and guess what? It gave me this error.

    Sorry, to access to the page you need to enable "cookies" in your browser settings.
    A "cookies" is a small amount of information that a web site copies to your computer.

    If you use Internet Explorer 5.0, you have to do the following to enable "cookies":
    Press 'Tools' on the top bar of Internet Explorer. Then press 'Internet Options' -> 'Security' and set medium or lower level of security. You can also press 'Custom' button in 'Security' options and set 'Allow per session cookies (not stored)' in 'Enable'.

    If you use Internet Explorer 6.0, you have to do the following to enable "cookies":
    Press 'Tools' on the top bar of Internet Explorer. Then press 'Internet Options' -> 'Security' and set medium or lower level of security. You can also press 'Advanced' button in 'Privacy' options and uncheck 'Override automatic cookie handling' box.
    If you want to be notified when Internet Explorer accepts a cookie, check 'Override automatic cookie handling' and set 'First-party Cookies' & 'Third-party Cookies' in 'Prompt'.

    If you use AOL 5.0:
    On the 'My AOL' menu, click 'Preferences'. On the 'Preferences' window, click 'WWW', then press 'Security' tab. Set medium (or lower) level of security (or press 'Custom' button and set 'Allow per session cookies (not stored)' in 'Enable'). Click 'Ok'. If that does not work, please update to AOL 6.0.

    If you use Netscape Navigator 4.7 or higher:
    From the Edit menu, choose Preferences. Click the Advanced category. Click one of the radio buttons. If you want to be notified when Communicator accepts a cookie, check "Warn me before accepting a cookie."

    Home © 1999-2001. Cybiko, Inc. All rights reserved.

    can you belive the nerve of them? Not to mention their incredibly bad coding standards to make a site that can't handle these things graciously!
    Bastards.

    --
    You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely.
    1. Re:Two things.... by phil+reed · · Score: 2

      Not only that, but whenever you connect it to your PC to load stuff on it, the software sends your personal information to the Cybiko site. It also apparently collects information on Cybikos it communicates with and sends THAT as well.

      --

      ...phil
      "For a list of the ways which technology has failed to improve our quality of life, press 3."
    2. Re:Two things.... by gtada · · Score: 1

      Look harder. The specs are right on the website.

      CYBIKO XTREMETM MODEL CY44801.

      Hardware specifications
      Main Processor Hitachi H8S/2323 18MHz
      Coprocessor Atmel AT90S2313 4MHz
      Memory:
      Parallel read-only flash 512Kb
      Disk (electronic RAM-Disk) 500Kb
      RAM 1.5Mb
      LCD Grayscale screen 160x100 pixels, 54x35 mm
      RF transceiver RF2915
      Expansion cartridge slot 24-pin proprietary
      PC/charging unit connection socket USB
      Size 81 mm x 141mm x 19mm (3.2" x 5.6" x 0.8")
      Weight 150 g (0.33 lbs.)
      Software specifications
      Operating System CyOSTM v.1.5
      Software CyOSTM v.1.5 compatible applications
      Communication Protocol CyDP x.30 (Cybiko RF Digital Protocol)
      and Fast Communication Protocol
      Dynamic Virtual Local Wireless Network Automatically provided by CyOSTM and CyDP
      RF communication features
      Frequency 902-928 MHz
      Number of channels 30 digital channels
      Communication Rate 19200 bps each channel
      Chat Communication Range up to 150 ft indoor, up to 500 ft outdoor (environment dependent)
      File Transfer/Multi-Player Game Range 65 ft
      Max. on-line Cybiko computers 3000 (100 units on each of 30 channels)

      And speaking of handling things graciously, I think calling them "bastards" shows little grace.

  45. Karma whoring... by scanman857 · · Score: 1

    Has Quake been ported to this? I wonder if you could use the wireless networking for a Beowulf cluster?

    1. Re:Karma whoring... by tsuni · · Score: 1

      I'd wondered about distributed computing possibilities as well but, after doing some Cybiko programming, can tell you it's not well suited at all for the task. The processor's not particularly fast, and the round-trip time with their reliable messaging is on the order of a full *second*. It might be a reasonable tool for demonstrating (slowly) how distributed computing works though...

      I've had a group doing Cybiko programming for about a year now on some NSF-sponsored wireless networking teaching materials. We've put together apps to demonstrate a variety of routing algorithms (flooding, distance vector, and link state) using collections of Cybikos, and they work great for showing students how these things work.

      Brad Richards
      Computer Science Department
      Vassar College

  46. George WIPO Bush! Important Message For by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 0



    Please Include this comment with your Taco-Snotting FAQ guide. Thanks.

    Important Information For Slashdot Users

    It has come to my attention that the entire Slashdot editor crew engage in homosexual activities. CmdrTaco is one such person who shares in this, and is often referred to as the leader of this purely gay movement. This cult has been created for the worship and the spreading of Taco-Snotting beliefs and values. For further information on Taco-Snotting please refer to George WIPO Bush's Taco-Snotting FAQ which can be easily found by searching for the Slashdot journal of George WIPO Bush or by looking in the comments of Slashdot articles (Usually modded -1).

    It has also come to my attention that CmdrTaco has other interests besides homosexuality (Believe it or not). One such interest includes a budding music career with a song titled "Gaping Anus". The details are very sketchy on this topic but all I know are that besides the vocals of CmdrTaco, it also includes Slashdot editors Timothy and CowboyNeal with various references to others involved in this homosexual cult. One puzzling oddity is the inclusion of Pamela Lee Anderson in the song. She is a female who is worshipped by many men and women far and wide for her large sizes of certain bodily parts. If anyone has any information on this specific topic, please post it in under this message in the Slashdot comments. There has been no release date set for this album or which record label it will be produced under. I believe CmdrTaco is planning to set up his own label, Taco-Snotting Records, with the intention of releasing the song on a cd-single with various remixes as soon as possible to catch the current popularity of the Taco-Snotting fad (Don't belive this fad will wear out like a Snotted-out-geek. I am sorry to say Taco-Snotting is here to stay :-( ). Various remixes will include the "Extra Jizz", "Snot Me Baby One More Time", "Non-Stop Hip Hop", "Gaping Man" (You know...the Gaping Man...the loose assed faggot from http://www.goatse.cx), and the "Can't Stop Till You Taco-Snot" versions. With many many more to come.

    Through a good, non-homosexual friend of mine, I have recieved a copy of the lyrics to the "Gaping Anus" musical composition. Included at the end of this post is a very speical tribute ending written by yours truely. Perhaps CmdrTaco will ask of me to provide the vocals for this ending. Please feel free to read the lyrics (In true type font) and share your comments and disgust.

    BTW, please do not reply with the intention of flaming me because the lyrics are a rip-off of ICP's "Slim Anus". CmdrTaco is the author of this fine musical work and not me. So, in conclusion it is obviously he who has ripped off ICP and not me. I am truely serious. Thank you.

    Hi, my name is what?
    My name is who?
    My name is Gaping Anus
    Hi, my name is huh?
    My name is what?
    My name is the fudgepacker
    Hi, my name is what?
    My name is who? (Excuse me)
    My name is the nutlicker
    Hi, my name is what? (Can I have the attention of your ass?)
    My name is who?
    My name is the buttsniffer

    Hi, kids do you like Anus?
    I let Linus Torvalds fill up my butt for a chance to be famous (Uh huh)
    Wanna copy me and do exactly like I did? (Yeah)
    Try Taco-Snotting and get your butt pumped out like I did?
    My brains dead weight
    I'm tryin to get my head straight
    But I can't figure out
    Which Slashdot editor I wanna impregnate
    Timothy said, "CmdrTaco you a cutie" (Uh huh)
    "I'll give you a deal, let me up in that booty" (OK!)
    Well since age 12 I felt like I'm someone else
    Cause I choked my original self Taco-Snotting him (Yup)
    Got pissed off and ripped Pamela Lee's tits off
    She don't know how to do Chris D
    I'd suck his dick off

    Hi, my anus who?
    My anus what?
    My anus it gets tapped dawg
    Hi, my anus (Excuse me)
    My anus
    My anus every now and then gets plugged up
    Hi, my anus (Can I have the attention of your ass?)
    My anus
    My anus is occasionally reamed out
    Hi, my anus who?
    My anus what?
    My anus really needs to be filled up

    My boss wanted to fire me yesterday
    I told him to take his pants off, hooked him up, he let me slide
    I pinched his ass
    He winked at me
    He chased me around the desk
    I told him "Come and get me!"
    Walked in the strip club
    Had my jacket zipped up
    Flashed the bartender
    And I tried to feel his dick up
    Extra-terestrial runnin over pedestrians
    In a space ship while they screamin at me
    Let's just be friends!
    99% of my life I was lied to
    I just found out my Mom screws more guys than I do (Damn)
    I told her I'd grow up to be a famous Taco-Snotter
    She met CowboyNeal I couldn't believe it when he slapped her
    You know you blew up when the women rush the stands
    And try to touch your hands
    But I need me a man
    This guy at Gay Al's strip club asked for my autograph (Dude can I get your
    autograph?)
    So I signed it Dear Alan Cox, thanks for the support
    Nice ass!

    Hi, my name is huh?
    My name is who? (Excuse me)
    My name is (They call me the pore plugger)
    Hi, my name is what?
    My name is who?
    My name is the inch itcher (Excuse me)
    One of Slashdot's gay boys
    They call me the butt itcher
    Hi, my name is what?
    My name is who?
    My name is (I've been called Hemos' butt boy)

    Stop the tape this gaylord needs to be locked away (Get him)
    Cliff, don't just stand there operate
    Or feel up my balls and buttcheeks
    Anal lube got my ass greasy for weeks
    Stick your manhood between my cheeks (Yup)
    Am I coming or going
    I can barely decide
    I just drank a pint of semen
    Dare me to drive? (Go ahead)
    All my life I was very deprived
    CowboyNeal's butt is too sexy to hide
    Take your pants off Neal I don't mind
    Clothes rip like the incredible Hulk
    I Taco-Snot when I talk
    I do any guy that walks
    When I was little I used to get so hungry I would throw fits
    Sometimes I sit and wish Hemos had a set of tits
    CowboyNeal: "Get behind me CmdrTaco and grab me by my hips"
    If I do that then I can't kiss you on your lips
    By the way if you see my Dad
    Ask him if he seen my spread in Gay House Porno Mag

    Hi, my anus who?
    My anus what?
    My anus gets tapped up
    Hi, my anus who?
    My anus what?
    My anus it's always getting plugged up
    Hi, my anus who?
    My anus what?
    My anus occasionally reamed out
    My anus it needs to be filled up

    Your anus
    Your anus
    Your anus is always getting plugged
    Your anus
    Your anus
    Your anus is always getting stuffed
    You wanna diss us?
    We don't even know you you little bitch
    You wanna sit there and diss us?
    You little bitch I'll slap your face off
    That's what happens when you go up against the Slashdot Trolls trick
    You little bitch (Laughs)
    Gaping Anus!