Slashdot Mirror
George Lucas Consolidates his Empire
Shadowcat writes "George Lucas is consolidating his galaxy, merging LucasArts, Lucas Digital (ILM & Skywalker Sound), Lucas Licensing, and Lucasfilm into one mega-corporation to provide a single place to create all sorts of media. You can find the
article on SF Chronicle Site."
with my chance for a first post??
Just maybe we'll see about 10 thousand more star wars games, cause there aren't enough....
Well....the evil grows
I wonder what the final company will be called? LucasEgo Intergalactic?
Wow, Lucas is actually creating a sort of Empire...
I was worried the final Star Wars wasn't going to be any good.
does this mean SOMEONE will now figure out that we hate Jar Jar??
Hollywood.com's story
Bizjournal.com's story
Uemedia.com's story
Anyway, it IS going to (still) be called Lucasfilm Ltd.
Wait shit
Anyways Lucas will try anything and everything to make as much money off of something that he can, this has been proven on many occassions, what makes it so unsettling for slashdot readers is that _WE_ really enjoy the star wars films and we all go and see them. SEE the problem? We hate it, but we love it, ack capitalism vs. socialism.
Posting as AC because I'm too lazy to log in and I already an "Excellent"
George will likely seek the hand of Athina, the grand-daughter of Aristotle Onassis, now that she's turned 18 and inherited all that money.
"Would it kill you to put down the toilet seat?" -- Maya Angelou
I doubt this will change the fact that the third Star Wars will probably suck.
I always wondered why Lucas didn't do this before. He had all these disparate companies that did different things. It seems like he could do things a lot more efficiently if they combined everything into one mega-studio.
Perhaps I'm missing something, but I don't really see what the purpose of this is. Doesn't Lucas already own all three of these companies and don't they all work together on his creative abomin^H^H^H^H^H^Hprojects? Someone please clue me in as to why Lucas would want to bother doing something like this.
Later, George was overheard muttering to himself:
"Truth, fiction...I'm the guy with the lightsaber. Fzoom!"
"Don't be too proud of this technological terror you've constructed. The ability to destroy a planet [through rampant licensing] is insignificant next to the power of the Force."
Formula for cinematic infamy:
I had a sig, but
your friends have failed.
Now witness the firepower of this fully armed and operational mega-corporation!
Aside from one big balance sheet come tax-time, why does this matter to the end-viewer?
Is it me or do companies split off and merge at stock market whims? A companies stock goes up for merging, the all merge. When one company makes money from spinning off, they all start spinning off companies.
---------------------
OnRoad: It gets you there and back again.
The Empire is reorganizing.
Marin movie mogul George Lucas said Tuesday he is consolidating four companies bearing his name into a single entity, Lucasfilm Ltd.
Lucas, whose first five "Star Wars" movies grossed a reported $2.1 billion, currently scatters 2,000 special-effects specialists, video game designers and other workers at four companies around Marin County: special-effects shop Lucas Digital, gamemaker LucasArts Entertainment, the lucrative Lucas Licensing and Lucasfilm. Most of those employees will relocate to a planned Digital Arts Center in San Francisco's Presidio in late 2005, according to Lucasfilm spokeswoman Lynn Hale.
In a statement on Tuesday, Lucas, who raced to fortune and fame with "American Graffiti" in 1973, laid out his company's plans to integrate operations.
"During the past 10 years, my companies have functioned relatively independent of each other. We have decided to bring these entities together. . . . This new structure will make it easier for our diverse talents to work as a team."
Simultaneously with news of the reorganization, Lucas announced the departure of Lucasfilm President Gordon Radley, who said in a prepared statement that he is leaving to pursue unspecified opportunities.
Lucasfilm's chief financial officer, Micheline Chau, appears to be the rising star in the organization, as Lucas promoted her to chief operating officer, charged with overseeing the new, unified company.
No mention was made of any layoffs from restructuring.
Privately held Lucasfilm is usually guarded when commenting about internal matters and keeps a relatively low profile between mega-projects such as "Star Wars" and "Indiana Jones" films. The company appears to be repositioning itself for the time, two or three years off, when the sixth and last of the "Star Wars" movies rolls into cineplexes.
The reorganization comes at a time when Lucasfilm faces some formidable competitors in the digital entertainment realm. Among them are Japan's powerhouse Sony Corp., struggling but massive AOL Time Warner and the animation specialists at Pixar Inc., a company that Lucas sold some time ago to Apple Computer Inc. CEO Steve Jobs. Pixar has subsequently earned critical and commercial success with its sophisticated use of supple computer animation.
"We're definitely looking to the future," Hale said. "It's a good time to do it. It's going to be a unified and diverse entertainment company."
Hale said the semi-autonomous structure of Lucas companies such as Industrial Light & Magic, which does contract work on a variety of Hollywood movies, has worked well in the past, but future needs require fewer barriers to collaboration.
"I think it did work. It built a success in various fields," she said. "We're a stronger company than we've ever been."
Gaile Daikoku, an entertainment analyst for GartnerG2, a research firm, said that cost-cutting could have been one factor behind the reorganization plan. Rolling all the units under one umbrella could eliminate duplicated efforts between the various units and reduce costs, especially in the administrative area.
Daikoku also said the change may be aimed at making it easier for clients to do business with Lucasfilm. For example, she said Fox, which is working with Lucasfilm on "Star Wars," may have had to call people at each of Lucas' several companies to discuss licensing of video games, toys and home video. Under a new organization, the job would be accomplished with one phone call, she said.
"You want to make it one face for the company versus five," Daikoku said.
Prior to Tuesday's announcement, Lucas had made some moves to reorganize his corporate ventures, which together racked up revenue of $1.5 billion in 2001, according to an estimate by Forbes magazine. Last May, for example, Lucas sold off THX, his sound design company, for an unspecified sum, to investors including Creative Labs.
Tim Schafer, a video game designer for LucasArts who left Lucas in 2000 after 10 years to start his own video game company, San Francisco's Double Fine Productions, said the Lucas reorganization might be smart from a creative,
as well as a business, standpoint.
"We used to wish there was more cooperation between Industrial Light & Magic and games, and now maybe there will be," Schafer said. "We used to gripe in the old days that we really could use some of ILM's resources."
Lucasfilm has two future features under development, according to Hale, who didn't offer firm release dates for them. Lucas's old film-school pal, Steven Spielberg, will direct the fourth "Indiana Jones" movie, with Harrison Ford reprising his role as the swashbuckling archaeologist, Hale said.
Meanwhile, Lucas himself is writing the sixth and, he says, concluding "Star Wars" movie, which he will also direct.
Lucasfilm Ltd. at a glance
Headquarters: San Rafael
Chairman and CEO: George Lucas
Workforce: 2,000
2001 revenue: $1.5 billion
Current projects: Building the $300 million Letterman Digital Arts Center at the Presidio, which will house 2,500 employees. Working on final chapter of the "Star Wars" series and another "Indiana Jones" movie, starring Harrison Ford and directed by Steven Spielberg.
Chronicle staff writer Verne Kopytoff contributed to this report. / E-mail David Armstrong at davidarmstrong@sfchronicle.com.
January 29th, 2003, AP Rumours of major re-organization in California today from Media Baron George Lucas' Lucasfilm company. Merging four distinct entertainment entities into one, this easily allows Lucas to command his armies of creative types into the future battlefield of the digital frontier. Also, in a related story, sales of white plastic one-size-fits-all suits has increased dramatically nation-wide.
is fire the directors and get someone who'll make the actors actually act!!
He is one egocentric guy, naming almost all those companies after himself...
I personally liked the name 'Industrial Light and Magic' (ILM) - it sounds pretty cool.
#define ROSE any_other_name
this should blow the planet up
The dark side merges YOU!
"During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act." - George Orwell, 1984
Can't Taco start a Starwars site.
This has nothing to do with geeks.
It is not SF.
It isn't even good fiction.
George Lucas is just another greedy Hollywood producer of crap.
-- Steve "Blow" Jobs
... until a ship landed a few miles south of my house and unloaded a bunch of droids.
Dang George.. he's trying to build a monopoly and destroy other movie businesses! Darn him!
We must now start an open-movie force! We'll build movies for free, and all the scripts will be written (and sanity-checked) by students. We can include a free sound-crunching system and rendering farm. We'll call it ShowForge.. and we can have a solid business.. let's see.. Movix.. then we can have some of the Movix people drop out and call themselves the FMF (Free Movie Foundation).
Oo oo... and then we'll need a mascot. We'll take a Red Rhone Cow... (So no infriging on any possible movie system that Gateway could come up with), and we'll call 'em Mux!! Yeah.. that's the ticket. Then we'll make movies for free, with volunteer actors, and make movies a-plenty. Taco and Hemos in Rob & Jeff's Excellent Adventure!
Then we could make a Star Wars movie.. maybe call it Distro Wars! YEAH!
Ok.. now, I'll bet that 3rd Star Wars movie is sounding not-so-bad, eh? Hehehehe...
-What have you contributed lately?
Not only is he trying to be a karma whore, but there's also a goatsex link in the text!! FEAR!
The more companies will slip through your fingers.
What signature defines me as a person?
Torture and kill Jar Jar Binks. With superaccurate blood-splash algorithms! [http://eg.ath.cx]
More Jar Jar! How about a Jar Jar trilogy. Me no thinkem dat will happen but me can hope.
The more you tighten your grip George, the more creativity will slip through your fingers.
I like the new starwars, I have finally come to accept that I like complaining about things, and that I probobly have had more fun over the past few years bashing the new movies than I ever would have had if it was actually good.
-You're wasting your time. Alfador only likes me.
If Jar Jar proposed that the board vote on the consolidations.
Offtopic but since my submission wouldn't be accepted,
RIAA website hacked again
Offtopic but since my submission wouldn't be accepted,
RIAA website hacked again
I can't wait for the robotic Senator Amidala with realistic hand and mouth action...
He could leverage a hostile takeover of Microsoft.
The simple truth is that interstellar distances will not fit into the human imagination
- Douglas Adams
I guess we're about to find out whether crap has a critical mass.
Sheesh, evil *and* a jerk. -- Jade
I was working for a cheap-ass closeout bookstore just north of Marin when Star Wars Episode II was coming out. A gentleman wearing a shitload of Lucas swag (jacket, shirt, hat) came in to the store with his family about a week before the movie came out.
I helped him find the book he was looking for (miracle of miracles, we had a copy), and I asked him if he worked at Lucas or just had friends/family there.
Turned out, he worked for LucasArts, and he had just come from a screening for employees of all of the Lucas companies. He said that it was worth seeing, but not really the best of the series.
Then there was a pause.
"You know what my next question is," I said.
"Yes. He's on screen for all of about five minutes, and they toned him down."
That was a fun experience, to get an honest appraisal of the movie before it came out and to find out the most important thing about the movie without even mentioning the "J-J-word".
And he did it without killing off the Jedi Council, something even Palpatine couldn't do!
"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."
ARKIN: The Imperial Senate will no longer be of any concern to us. I've just received word that the Emperor has dissolved the council permanently. The last remnants of the Old Republic have been swept away.
TAGGE: That's impossible! How will the Emperor maintain control without the bureaucracy?
TARKIN: The regional governors now have direct control over territories. Fear will keep the local systems in line. Fear of this battle station.
filter: +3. Hey, look! all the trolls went away!
"This company is now the ultimate power in the movie industry. I suggest we use it."
I wonder if slashdot will create a LucasBorg in the likes of billyG...would could have a Borg War and see who would win
Completely offtopic, but the last company I worked for the CTO called himself "The Wizard", said that on his business cards and everything.
These are not the droids you are looking for...
"These are not the droids you are looking for..."
"Is that your final answer?"
Looks like any hope I had for a LucasArts internship is now down the drain.
Anakin Skywalker, or the guy who plays him on tv was at the bar i was drinking at last night. I felt no courage enough to take on the would-be-master of evil, as I had not enough liquid FORCE in me at the time.
I should have told him his boss was an egomaniac.
How not to screw up episode III. I think Lucas should step aside as director and give that task to someone who knows what they're doing. Ever since American Graffiti has Lucas ever directed anything sensibly? (Not even Star Wars).
I for one, liked Jar Jar. All you geeky jedi wanna-bes, can't you just grow up and accept that there are people around that you don't like? Obiwan was man enough to have Jar Jar come along with him on the adventure, can't you be a bit more mature, like Obiwan?
I mean, what did Jar Jar do that was so terrible? He may be clumbsy, but he is the most well meaning character and has done nothing wrong.
Get a life.
then eat your gorilla in soviet russia!
*insert open-source Soviet Russian death star Empire Jar Jar joke here*
That ^H joke makes you look like a fucking retard.
Have a nice day.
All your Force are belong to ME!
Always going forward, 'cause we can't find reverse.
From:
D =2 624
http://cgi.theforce.net/theforce/tfn.cgi?storyI
Gary Kurtz, the producer of ANH and ESB, spoke at the Sci-Fi Expo in Plano, TX this weekend along with his daughters Tiffany and Melissa (as children they played Jawas in ANH). He shared with the crowd about meeting Lucas, leaving the Star Wars films and the original plans for the entire saga.
.
.
.
EPISODE 1: Was to focus on the origins of the Jedi Knights and how they are initiated and trained
EPISODE 2: Introduction and development of Obi-Wan Kenobi
EPISODE 3: Introduction and life of Vader
EPISODE 4: There were seven different drafts of the film. At one point, they pursued buying the rights to Hidden Fortress because of the strong similarities. At one point, Luke was a female, Han was Luke's brother, Luke's father was the one in prison (interesting point for some debates) and the film featured 40 wookies
EPISODE 5: Once written, the screenplay of Empire is almost exactly what is seen on screen. The only cut scenes were those involving wampas in the rebel base (cut because of time and unsolved technical glitches) and about two minutes of Luke/Yoda Jedi training with no real dialog.
EPISODE 6: Leia was to be elected "Queen of her people" leaving her isolated. Han was to die. Luke confronted Vader and went on with his life alone. Leia was not to be Luke's sister.
EPISODE 7: Third trilogy was to focus on Luke's life as a Jedi, with very few details planned out.
EPISODE 8: Luke's sister (not Leia) appears from another part of the galaxy.
EPISODE 9: First appearance of the Emperor.
Take a look at the "mythical" 7, 8, and 9. They don't take place after the fall of the Empire. They basically drag out everything that happened in Jedi over 4 movies instead of one, killing Han in the process. Can you imagine EPISODE 7, an entire Star Wars movie devoted solely to Mark Hamill!?!?
From what I've read the reason why Kasdan left Jedi was because he wanted the episode 6 listed here instead of ending it at Jedi.
Whatever Lucas's mistakes, ending it at Jedi was an excellent move (and one that cost Lucas a great deal of money). Ending it at Jedi helped save the original Star Wars movies from dragging out and getting stale. Whatever you say about the new movies, if you wish you can essentially ignore them and just enjoy the great story told in the original 3.
Brian Ellenberger
....are good...keep 'em coming. Who needs mod points when we can get instant feedback from the group at large. Why wait for the so-called site admins to turn over the right rock.
Democracy rules.
...that 'Lucas Arts franchise dealership' you wanted is closer to a reality!
They grounded me for smoking pot!
I didn't even bother going to Episode 2.
Uh oh, I can see my karma falling now. One of us will keep our "excellent" karma.
You can't judge a book by the way it wears its hair.
RIAA down (again/still...thank bhudda) ----> crapflood....Lucas Arts plans more toys---->flood of crap.
./ shows no hope of ever having logical submission handling, so we're have to send a man to do the job...that's us!
See..only one Kevin Bacon away.
Keep these adhoc submittals coming.
... You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy.. we must be cautious"
But hell, no matter what i gotta give him props what must be one of the greatest space fantasies i have seen (episodes iv - vi anyway)
Suchetha
learn from yesterday, plan for tomorrow, party tonight
or one out of three ain't bad
When I'm not huffing spray paint from paper bags or negotiating peace in the Middle East, my thoughts often turn to women.
And how they smell. And then I don't feel like eating dinner.
in Conversation amid mixed company, most of us are aware of the distasteful folkloric scuttlebutt surrounding repugnant vaginal aromas. As a child, you most likely heard the cruel schoolyard jokes about "hot tuna." You've probably also groaned at the juvenile proverb which states that there are two things in this world that smell like fish, one of them being fish. You may have even encountered the puerile poem about the "seven wise men" who created the vagina: "Fifth was a fisherman, nasty as hell/He threw in a fish and gave it a smell." Even pudendal pseudonyms such as "the bearded oyster" hint at some level of olfactory offense.
From what I've been told, some men actually like the smell. Some men enjoy watching their corn-kerneled shit swirl down the toilet, too. Some men drink beer and get prostatitis. Some men like having their scrotal sacs nailed to sheetrockwhat's your point?
Ooh, that smell. The first thing you're likely to sniff in this wretched life is a deep, sobbing chestful of your mother's afterbirth, yet that memory is usually too distant and traumatic to ever have a hope of salvaging. But after one passes the Age of Reason, you aren't likely to forget the full-frontal face-slap of a rancid pussy, even after extensive psychotherapy. And, if you're like me, your first indelible whiff of it came via an older friend's manual digit in the eternal tradition of "Hey, man, smell my finger."
The older friend's name was Mike. His girlfriend's name was Carol. We all wore denim pants and denim jackets. Under a cold nighttime sky set aglow by an aggressively white moon, I sat atop a small concrete wall, waiting for Mike to kiss Carol goodnight. It took awhile. He must have rounded first base and headed for third, for after bidding Carol adieu, Mike proudly marched over to me and held his fuck-you finger an inch under my nostrils. Carol's afterstench was a heady, almost inebriating snoutful of urine and sea bass. It was there, on that concrete wall, where I concluded that a woman's vagina could be a place wherein considerable evil dwelt.
In my day I've smelled fishy cunts, skunky cunts, yeasty cunts, pissy cunts, sweaty cunts...too many cunts, probably. I've inhaled membrane-withering lungfuls of toxic twatfumes from vaginas that looked like rats dipped in Vaseline. I've borne witness to a stomach-pumping surfeit of swollen, bloody, scabby, mucus-spewing snatches. Too much oozing, malodorous cunt caviar, too many hairy hornet's nests of chickstink. And yet the self-appointed voices of reason assure me that "once you get past the smell, you've got it licked." How the fuck do you get past the smell?
Although the estrus-crazed arbiters of politeness would have us believe it's only a misogynistic myth, the existence of rank-smelling females seems to be a staple of all cultures' folklore. Most world religionsand rightly soespouse some notion of women as "unclean." When angered, a foul-mouthed Chinaman is likely to yelp, "Tiu nia ma chow hai!" ("Fuck your mom's smelly cunt!") at anyone within earshot of his egg roll stand. Reflecting the same sort of vaginal ageism, the French have observed, "Les conasses des femmes âgeé avez une odeur mauvaise." ("Old ladies' cunts stink.")
And though it's not considered polite con
A Gentleman's Guide to Vaginal Odor
Probe #5
Not many years later, in a gesture of male-bonding nobility, I was able to proffer my own finger to a younger friend, encouraging him to nasally sample the mucosal femalia from a calamari-perfumed Italian girl I'd diddled an hour or so earlier. I had indulged in "heavy petting" with the hairy-lipped wop lass outside her house in West Philly, dropped her off, and drove deep out into the suburbsand then took a dip in my friend's backyard poolbefore I let him smell my finger. And yet it stank. Strongly.
But perhaps the worst pussy I ever had the displeasure of smelling was attached to an alarmingly overweight woman of Dutch extraction with whom I shacked up during a period when my self-esteem was life-threateningly low. Once you got past the rolls and rolls of stretch-marked hog fat, there lay her bedraggled pussy, crowned with a sparse reddish thorn bush. Her cunt looked like a fat slice of ham swimming in white gravy. Her crotch was a boiling fumarole of noxious emissions, a stinking puddle of snatch-slop. Her discharges were colored a sickly silver, with the gloppy consistency of herring sauce. The smells which emerged from between her bloated, floppy legs ranged from rotted onion to burnt crab to odors which were so fetid, I must force myself to stop thinking of them lest I scream.
I'm a man who sees a problem with America.a man who wants to fix it.
My purpose isn't to offend the few clean-smelling women out there with the crude suggestion that EVERY vagina in the USA gushes with foul, gelatinous, swordfishlike discharges.
Only far too many of them.
I do feel, way down in my nose hairs, that this country faces a Cunt Crisis: Our streets are littered with good girlshonest girlswalking around smelling like octopi. Vaginal odor ruins romance and fosters much distrust between the sexes. Few things dampen an amorous male's affection more than the rank, odiferous stench of a woman who has degraded herself through poor hygienic practices. Many bright, well-meaning maidens have seen their love lives dashed to pieces because their genitals' pungency suggested unhealthful habits and debauchery. Can these women be saved? Sure, but first they must be scrubbed. And disinfected. And schooled in methods of blunting their natural offensiveness.
But I don't want anyone to get the wrong idea.
It's not my intent to have you believe that ALL women stink.
As a Philadelphia cabdriver, I was once flagged down by a hulking Negress, a dead ringer for Shirley Hemphill, who instructed me to drive her to a nearby mental hospital. She then pulled a sopping-
Your first indelible whiff of it came via an older friend's manual digit in the eternal tradition of "Hey, man, smell my finger."
wet twenty-dollar bill from her African vagina and handed it to me. Upon later inspection, I was relieved to discover that the soaking greenback offered absolutely no smell. It was as if the woman's vaginal flora had actually laundered the item of currency.
No, I've encountered clean cunts before. In fact, I'm married to one.
That's right. Almost a decade ago, the skanky pussies disappeared into my nightmares like the cheap '50s B-movie monsters they were. I met a woman of Hebraic ancestry whose nether regions bore no stomach-souring smells. I promptly wed her. Ten years of fish-free connubial bliss. Our secret to a successful marriage? No vaginal odor. Her cunt smells about the same as my wristnot at all. She was born with the Unscented brand of pussy. The li'l Jewgirl's got good bacteria. I'm blessed.
But, being the civic-minded feller I am, I started to worry about the other pussiesthe less-fortunate ones. What about them? Why do some girls stink, while others remain odor-freefree, indeed, to laugh, to love, to cuddle? Why do roses bloom in some fields, while manure festers in others? And finally, what in the name of the Homo Jesus Clown are the biological mechanisms behind vaginal malodor?
To understand vaginal odor, you must first understand the vagina itself. The foul truth is that every woman carries a potential stink cat between her legs. There's a whole science-fair project going on in there, a wild kingdom of aquatic bacilli. Mucus oozes from her pussy walls like water being squeezed from a floor mop. Her everyday secretions serve to cleanse those sugar walls in the same way that saliva keeps one's mouth from becoming overrun with the slime of half-chewed pretzels. In a normal, happy vagina, certain "good guy" microorganisms such as the lactobacillus bacteria create an acidic pH balance which thwarts the growth of more sinister, odor-causing germs.
Candida albicans, more commonly known as vaginal yeast fungus, exists in small enclaves in every vagina. But once a pussy's pH balance is thrown off-kilter, yeast fungi may explode in number, causing thick, whitish, cottage-cheesy discharges to flow from a gal's labia like thousands of miniature twat biscuits. An effulgent yeast infection, which is estimated to strike three of every four women at least once in their lifetimes, may smell vaguely like baking bread. When the yeast cells begin to die en masse, they release a compound known as mercaptan, which has been targeted as the culprit behind the smells of dead flesh, poo-poo, and skunks. Mercaptan has also been described as smelling somewhat like burnt rubber. So if it looks like cottage cheese and smells like a car crash, yeast may be to blame.
A Gentleman's Guide to Vaginal Odor
The legendary fish odor may be symptomatic of a syndrome known as bacterial vaginosis (BV), especially if the smell seems particularly tart directly following intercourse. As with yeast infections, BV is a sign that renegade germs have overthrown the vagina's normal bacterial balance. Microscopic critters such as gardnerella vaginalis, thought to exist in a quarter to half of all human vaginas, come to prominence at the expense of more benign bacteria. These bad-boy microorganisms secrete waste materials which irritate the vaginal walls and yield discharges redolent of rotting trout heads. BV can be tamed through prescription topical gels.
Another root cause of feminine fishiness is a single-celled monster known as trichomonas (or "trich"), a highly contagious protozoan which infests upwards of three million cunts yearly via toilet seats, towels, and sexual intercourse. One medical text describes trich as giving rise to a "yellow/green frothy discharge," accompanied by burning, itching, and the unmistakable air of seafood. As with BV, a little dab of the proper antimicrobial glue will slay the dreaded trich dragon and prevent one's pussy from being eaten alive.
Of course, foul-smelling vaginal discharges could be the symptom of something far worse. Chlamydia (or "the clam") is often accompanied by vulvular rankness, as is gonorrhea. In a worst-case scenario, your lover's malodorous muff may signal the immunodeficiency breakdown associated with AIDS. Mangia!
Then again, it could be something as simple as the fact that the slob doesn't wash very often. Some pasty amalgam of piss, feces, crotch sweat, dead sperm, and menstrual waste could be causing the erection-killing fumes which destroy true intimacy. A little time spent Sudsing the Beaver couldn't hurt much.
Which brings us to the douche. Our society does not lack for douchebags. A woman can select from an array of vulva-scalding productssprays, creams, potions, lotions, jellies, foams, and herbal extractsall designed to blunt this, the cruelest of nature's jokes.
But as usual, nature has the last laugh. Not only does douching effect a genocide of undesirable bacteria, it also eliminates the good-guy germs which maintain a proper floral balance within the vagina, hastening yet more intra-pussy bacterial anarchy.
The pinnacle of douche ignorance is exemplified in a 1941 magazine ad for liquid Lysol. Over the course of four illustrated panels, the ad describes "how a young wife overcame the 'one neglect' that wrecks so many marriages."
Perhaps Rome fell not because it threw so many orgies, but
because it didn't clean up afterward.
After another blowout argument with her hubby, the ad's feminine protagonist tearfully visits her sister-in-law, who delicately explains, "You may be the guilty one, Sis. Often a husband's love grows cold just because a wife is carelessor ignorantabout feminine hygiene. It's one neglect few husbands can forgive." She then describes how her own doctor prescribed liquid Lysol "for intimate personal care." Taking her sister-in-law's advice, the distraught heroine squirts an indeterminate amount of liquid Lysol up her gash and returns home, where her husband is waiting with flowers. The ad further states that "thousands of modern women rely on 'Lysol' for feminine hygiene." It is impossible to gauge how many cunts were cauterized by such wrongheaded medical advice.
So tell her to put away the oven cleaners. Instead, gently suggest that she funnel a truckload of yogurt with live cultures into her gaping black hole. A fresh infusion of yogurt's acidophilus bacteria will replenish the healthful micro-bugs she'll need to fight the good fight against embarrassing odors. Vinegar or cranberry-juice douches are also recommended as sane ways to restore law 'n' order between her legs. For yeast infections, a garlic clove wrapped in cheesecloth and rammed up the snatch may do the trick, as may a tampon dipped in a three-percent solution of potassium sorbate. And as mentioned earlier, doctor-prescribed topical creams can prevent the invisible fishies from swimming upstream again.
Do flies buzz around your paramour's pudenda? Does her quim make you queasy? If you're nauseated with all the flounder-flavored cunt-puke which flows from her hole like so much Girl Lava, it's your sacred obligation as a boyfriend to tell her about it. Should couples engage in frank discussions about pussy smell? Indeed. You can't blame a chick for smelling that wayonly for not taking care of it. As her lover, you bear equal responsibility in assuring that she presents a clean, fresh-faced pussy to the world. It's your duty to offer gentle persuasion and softly muttered suggestions. And if the bitch doesn't clean up her act, you should abandon her like the mud-wallowing sow she is.
Perhaps Rome fell not because it threw so many orgies, but because it didn't clean up afterward. Sex should be something wonderful, not a test of one's endurance in germ warfare. A woman's gash should be her highest treasure, but all too often it is her shame. A lady's cum-bucket can either be a gleaming tabernacle or a reeking Port-A-Potty. It all comes down to proper bacterial management. The vaginas of America's women MUST be cleansed. If a nation cannot control the stink of its women, that nation is surely doomed to perish.
I thought the whole point of having a bunch of little companies under your control was to create a kind of tax shelter.
You know, Lucasfilm has to "pay" ILM for doing special effects for Star Wars 3, paying involes moving money around, moving money around = economy, the government likes the economy and gives Lucasfilm a big tax break for being a good corporate citizen and not doing all their stuff in house - that's how it looks on paper.
Lucas saves a bunch of cash and puts it all into his pocket.
Guess I thought wrong. Someone enlighten me, please!
he still cant make a movie worth a shit. sorta like sound feedback, he has too many of his own ideas bouncing off yes men *cough*mccullum*cough and he is getting shit feedback, and no one is there to do anything about it. he suffers from "Michael Jackson" syndrome. Yes. I'm a troll. But you agree with me.
Comment removed based on user account deletion
Imagine this: Shanghai Knights 3 in Space. This time Owen Wilson and Jackie Chan team up with Yoda to do kung-fu. I haven't seen the Owen Wilson/Jackie Chan shit-fests so I can't really extend this parody any further. I suppose there would be some jokes and, uh, dolls - possibly a Taco Bell tie-in? LucasConglom should buy a fast food chain, for future marketing considerations already. Also, my Shanghai Knights 3 shit-fest idea is a great one and I give it the green light. I just need to get the Boss to check it out and then we're rolling. In fact, we could use the two past Jackie Chan/Owen Wilson shit fest movies and just splice Yoda in. No need to film new scenes because the public doesn't remember anything. How do you think Episode II made money?
I hate liberals. If you are a liberal, do not reply.
Come on, Lucas is just tired of cashing 7 different paychecks at his local money store every Friday.
filmcritic.com - Movie reviews on Internet time
I forgot where I grabbed this from, if anyone knows please reply...
25 Lines From Star Wars that can be improved if you substitute the word "Pants"
1. A tremor in the pants. The last time I felt this was in the presence of my old master.
2. You are unwise to lower your pants.
3. We've got to be able to get some reading on those pants, up or down.
4. She must have hidden the plans in her pants. Send a detachment down to retrieve them. See to it personally Commander.
5. These pants may not look like much, kid, but they've got it where it counts.
6. I find your lack of pants disturbing.
7. These pants contain the ultimate power in the Universe. I suggest we use it.
8. Han will have those pants down. We've got to give him more time!
9. General Veers, prepare your pants for a surface assault.
10. I used to bulls-eye womp-rats in my pants back home.
11. TK-421. . . Why aren't you in your pants?
12. Lock the door. And hope they don't have pants.
13. Governor Tarkin. I recognized your foul pants when I was brought on board.
14. You look strong enough to pull the pants off of a Gundark.
15. Luke. . . Help me take...these pants off.
16. Great, Chewie, great. Always thinking with your pants.
17. That blast came from those pants. That thing's operational!
18. Don't worry. Chewie and I have gotten into a lot of pants more heavily guarded than this.
19. Maybe you'd like it back in your pants, your highness.
20. Your pants betray you. Your feelings for them are strong. Especially for your sister!
21. Jabba doesn't have time for smugglers who drop their pants at the first sign of an Imperial Cruiser.
22. Yeah, well short pants is better than no pants at all, Chewie.
23. Attention. This is Lando Calrissean. The Empire has taken control of my pants, I advise everyone to leave before more troops arrive.
24. I cannot teach him. The boy has no pants.
25. You came in those pants? You're braver than I thought.
Actually, Rogue Squadron and Rogue Leader were both good. So were Dark Forces, Jedi Knight and Jedi Knight II (though a good portion of the game was done by Raven, and not LucasArts).
The Starfleet Command series hasn't been that bad, and neither was the Elite Force game for the ST series.
"Completely offtopic, but the last company I worked for the CTO called himself "The Wizard", said that on his business cards and everything."
I tried to get 'Supreme Commander of the Universe' on my business card. That didn't fly but at least I have a coffee mug with those magical words emblazed on it.
It mentions in the article that Pixar was sold by Lucas to Apple. Funny, becuase I could have sworn they were small animation shorts, and then partnered with Disney to make Toy Story. I had never heard this part before.
I suppose the odd thing about this supposed marriage is that in their history, they've have typically stuck to PCs or Unix/Linux machines. Now I'll agree that most people see Sony as a big competitor to ILM, but I would say that there also needs to be Dreamworks Animation, and the company that has been producing LoTR.
To be honest, if I were a competitor of one of Lucas' companies, I would be happy to see this consolidation, assuming that they're truly going to put one management team in charge of the whole thing. Here's why.
1) As independent operations, each of those companies has a clear focus. The management team at the sound company knows that its goal is to provide the best sound work possible in order to get business from other production companies making films. The video game unit is focusing on making money on its games. The ILM people are focused on effects and selling those effects to other studios. From a business point of view, combining will tend to make those units lose focus, because they're now going to be looking at what the new "big boss" wants instead of focusing on individual goals. See Al Ries' book, "Focus," for a good discussion of why focus is essential to a company. (Actually, see almost any of the work from Ries and Jack Trout for more support of this point, going back to their work in the '70s on positioning.)
2) This is going to potentially create sales problems for the divisions that sell to other movie studios. As it has been, a studio that bought its special effects from ILM was dealing with a specialist company, NOT a competing studio. ILM's specialist competitors are now going to be saying (to other studios), "Why would you want to use LucasFilm? They're your competitor." You might say that it was that way already, but there's a very real difference when you're dealing with a company with a different name and different management team. If a studio is angry at LucasFilm for some action that it's taken in one area, they'll hold it against the whole company since they'll be one combined operation.
I know this is being pitched as something to streamline operations and reasons like that, but I would bet that the original idea originated with the bean counters for reasons involving taxes or other accounting reasons. My bet is that the decision was made for accounting reasons and is being sold as something to help operations.
I honestly don't see any operational advantage and I see multiple disadvantages. It will be interesting to see how the combined company does in the future (as compared to how its doing in its current structure), but since the numbers are private, we might never know.
David
If you'll look at the story again, you'll see that the article only referenced Apple by mentioning that it was "Apple CEO Steve Jobs" who bought the company. Apple has never owned Pixar or had any business relationship with it, other than sharing CEOs, unless I am badly mistaken. David
Actually, I really liked the Star Wars games before Episode I. Games like XWing and Tie Fighter are classics. Dark Forces and JKI were right up there too. I even liked the old console games (even though they were hard as heck). They were even willing to take a few risks. XWing vs. Tie Fighter was simply ahead of its time in being a primarily "Internet Only" game.
Around Episode I is when the games really started to suck. It was just too many games put together too quickly.
However, Lucasarts seems to be turning around with some help from companies like Raven and Bioware. Jedi Knight 2 deserves better than an honorable mention. It is in my opinion the best Star Wars game ever. It is the only game I have bothered playing through twice in many many years. It wasn't afraid to give you the full power of a Jedi in the name of presenting a "challenge". I am also looking forward to the upcoming Knights of the Old Republic RPG from Bioware.
Brian Ellenberger
In the first triology of Star Wars, it is quite obvious that good is at war with evil. Simple citizens of the galaxy are rebelling against the Empire. If one looks just below the surface of the plot, a message of rebellion against Mega-Corporations and capitalism can be found. The evil Empire of Capitalism must be destroyed by a bunch of good, independent freedom fighters. The bad guys always want to overthrow a regime and replace it with his own. But always, the new regime is evil as are the bad guys. This message hasn't been incorporated in the new episodes. In this real-life world, Lucas doesn't seem to promote this message anymore. Instead, he is building himself an Empire, an evil Empire guided by capitalism that is. The latest news about his corporation confirming this. Did he forget about his first Star Wars movies or did he simply turned over to the Dark side of capitalism? Is Lucas so weak of mind that he must conform to the rules of capitalism? Or is he just so uncomfortable with the chaos of simpleness and freedom?
DrkBr
So does this mean that Ep. III will have credits that don't last as long as the film itself since all the CGI, model and other work will be done "in house?" I thought that shit was never going to end in Ep. II (the credits...not the movie).
On a more serious note, this isn't really that surprising. 3-7 years ago, everyone and their dog was doing the diversification thing. Spin off divisions into completely separate companies that have "licensing agreements" with the parent company that allow for sweetheart deals that bulk up both company's "earnings" without any money actually changing hands.
In light of the current spotlight on corporate buttfuckery, now all these companies are bringing these spin off corps back in-house and making like nothing ever happened.
It doesn't hurt that Commandant GW Bush wants to make it so that the bigger your corporation is the less taxes you have to pay so that one $3 billion (annual revenue) corporation will pay about 1/4 the taxes of 3000 $1 million corporations.
I'm just sayin'...
BFL
There's one thing computing teaches you, and that's that there's no point to remembering everything.
--Doug Copland
That's my advice to George. He'd better work on getting some new creative properties going instead of spreading Star Wars around. That crap is wearing pretty thin.
Take away Star Wars and what has he got? Grim Fandango?
Now that's fuckin' classic, I pissed reading this god damn troll HAHAHAHA.
George Lucas merged four companies into a megacorporation? Shouldn't that be a quadcorporation? You don't often see a fusion of a million businesses into one corporate structure, unless you are talking about Enron subsidiaries.
Get your prefixes straight!
that's the funniest thing I've ever heard!
...does that mean that this will come down in price so i can freaking afford it?!??
Gentlemen...BEHOLD!
-Dr. Weird
Pot grounds your parents for smoking YOU!
That was either by Boyd Rice, or Jim Goad, I forget which. The Troll who posted it sure as hell did not think it up on his own though!
Who cares, it's a corporate re-org, probably to cut costs and make him richer, yar...
oooohhh...one company that has a monopoly over a certain sector, and is all powerful...
can i suggest "Lucassoft"????
if they ever went public, the symbol could be "LSFT"...fits perfectly...
"Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true." - Homer Simpson
How will Lucas maintain control without the bureaucracy?
I'm sorry.
My God, it's Full of Source!
OUTSIDE_IP=$(dig +short my.ip @outsideip.net)
Steven P. Jobs, current CEO of Apple, owns the controlling interest in Pixar. Not an Apple company, but it might as well be.
GJC
Gregory Casamento
## Chief Maintainer for GNUstep
Fear of his new corporation!!
Gregory Casamento
## Chief Maintainer for GNUstep
Congratulations! Per your sig, you are now deemed a "faggot!"
More information can be fount at this link.
Have a good day packing ass, fag. --randomized garbage-- adfjawp3ia;jvk;dskajv;kvas.d,mfaljks
hopefully they'll do something akin to the Agent Scene in the upcoming Matrix Movie. I can just imagine a saber wielding Jedi and a room full of Jar Jars!!! Oh, the sweetness!
Episode III: I wipe my ass with your money.
Comparing it to Windows will be a moot point, since El Dorado is going to have a 40% larger code base than XP.
"Death Star Productions"
No, that'd be AT&T.
Will I retire or break 10K?
Steve Jobs is Apple. And I was just curious about the relationship, since I am a big fan of Pixar and have never seen any thing referencing this.
And I think that Steve typically crucifies anyone working for him that is not using an Apple Computer.
Actually, I think you'd be surprised. The last I heard, Pixar used quite an assortment of computers, but maybe someone else knows more about the specifics of it than I do. I'm sure Jobs would LIKE to use Macs for everything at Pixar, but he's enough of a businessman to use the tools that get the job done, just as Apple is pragmatic enough to use non-Apple computers for some internal needs.
Also, you might be interested to know that before he came back to Apple, there was a time when Jobs was using an IBM ThinkPad instead of a Mac. (If I remember correctly, that came from an article in Wired magazine, but it's been awhile, so I could be wrong.)
David
Steve Jobs is Apple. And I was just curious about the relationship, since I am a big fan of Pixar and have never seen any thing referencing this.
And I think that Steve typically crucifies anyone working for him that is not using an Apple Computer.
(Sorry about the repost, missed Submit and hit post anan... didn't pay attention)
People are overlooking that GWL is building a brand new facility in San Francisco's Presido, which when completed (approx 2008) will house all his businesses, with the exception of Skywalker Sound (still at Skywalker Ranch) and LucasFilm, which is housed at a new facility just up the road from Skywalker Ranch. With all of his production busineses in one place, why have redundant HR or IT departments? Think of the benefits of having all your expertise centered in one spot, where they can easily advise and coordinate with each other.
GWL's a smart guy, and deserves the success he's achieved. I've worked for GWL, and let me tell you, it doesn't suck. Skywalker Ranch and Big Rock ranch are beautiful examples of what a work space can be. He puts his money where his mouth his, and when things goes well, he reaps the reward, and when things don't work out, he pays the tab.
They use a lot of stuff from Sun Microsystems.
Steve Jobs doesn't run Pixar the way he runs Apple.
And, in typical fashion, George Lucas takes credit for starting Pixar and then selling it to Steve Jobs.
IIRC, what really happened was that, in the early 1980s, all the people in the then-small ILM computer graphics department wanted to do full-length animated films using computer animation. Lucas, on the other hand, wanted ILM's CG department to supplement ILM's business as a VFX company for traditional films. They were able to reach an agreement where the guys in ILM's CG department would get to go out on their own, and in return they would hire and train their replacements, as well as giving ILM continued access to whatever technology they developed. Thus Pixar was formed.
In 1986(?), Steve Jobs acquired a controlling interest in the newly formed company. However, Pixar is John Lasseter's baby, and would most likely not have become so successful were it not for him.
On a side note, Lucas is a revisionist and a bit of a megalomaniac. I think that the new consolidation is an attempt to bring in the "wayward" companies (aka ILM). And while the LucasArts people might be glad about having better access to ILM's resources, I'll bet that the ILM people are none to pleased. I know I'd be pissed.
Yep they use lots of SUN machines for the renderfarm. But probably most of the artist workstations aer (or at least were) SGIs. There was some sort of statement by someone high up at Pixar that they would use Macs, at least in limited roles, when OSX came out. Some people speculated that they might turn the rederfarm to Apple servers but I think it was just a rumor.
Some people speculated that they might turn the rederfarm to Apple servers but I think it was just a rumor.
I doubt they'll do it. IIRC, they get their Sun machines dirt cheap, and in return they put, "Final Rendering on computers provided by Sun Microsystems".
They use Suns for non-rendering stuff too, like file serving, asset management, etc. I remember reading an article where the Pixar guy they interviewed said that they never take any of their old fileservers offline. Lots of VFX companies will just back up and then delete from the file servers anything not related to their current projects, but not Pixar evidently.
I think their reasoning was that by the time one of the file servers becomes obsolete, chances are that whatever is on it is also obsolete. However, they might want to go back and see how they did something in the past, etc., so they keep the old file servers online. The article used to be on Design in Motion, but now I can't find it.
They did it because it would have added a whole unecessary layer to the first hour of the film, slowing the story down and complicating it. Where does he get the parts from? How can he afford the equipment? When does he build them? How does he invent something so sophisticated so quickly?
It would have taken maybe 10 minutes to deal with that, that's a lot of screen time in an action movie.
By being organic, he had all his powers immediately which meant you could go straight into the main plot.
Given the autonomy that ILM has enjoyed when there hasn't been an army of Jar-Jar's to make, it's sad that now it will be under the arm of Lucas. Given his push to keep everything proprietary under tight control (THX, Laser Disc, etc.), this will probably affect the projects that they are able to do.
Sucks, because they've contributed to so many great projects out there, like several of the Star Trek movies. The same thing for LucasArts, I suppose.
just think about it all pieces fits, oon he vill hold the world ransom, when his company buils a gigant laser! And his army of clones attack the world!
"I bet I'll get blamed for this." --Mayor Quimby
Just wait until Lucas get's to the Presidio. .
The Presidio trust looks at Lucas as a cash cow and you can bet they plan to milk him for everything he's worth
Sony Interactive Entertainment is working with LucasArts to make Star Wars Galaxies. I fear the worst.