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Review: Star Wars Episode III

erikharrison writes "I just watched Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith. And it is good. There are lots of things I would like to say about it that I won't, as Slashdot isn't the place. Slashdot is the place to ask two questions, however. 1) How are the special effects and 2)What has Lucas done to the possibly tattered remains of my childhood?" Read on for Harrison's answers to those questions, and for Jamie's quite different impression of the sixth (and final?) Star Wars feature film.

The special effects question is easy: This is quite simply one of the most gorgeous films ever made. Everything is superb. Lucas has an incredible visual sense; he is a truly visual filmmaker, and his images hit home, are beautifully executed, and are technically stunning. Of course, we really and truly expect perfection here from Lucas, so this may not seem like news.

You are deceiving yourself. Lucas has frankly outdone what I thought possible. My jaw was on the floor the entire time.

But what about those tattered remains?

I myself am not a huge Star Wars fan. I enjoy the films, but I wasn't raised on them, didn't see any of them (except Episode II) in the theaters. I was one of those kids who knew Darth Vader was Luke's father before I had heard of Star Wars, because I saw the parodies before I saw the originals.

I will say this now. Episode III proves that "A New Hope" was a mistake. A freak accident of success, because Lucas seems incapable of doing fun action. How he managed to make "A New Hope" a delightful, playful, fundamentally fun movie is beyond me. Because when Episode III starts, it falls flat on its face, continuing the sad attempt in Episode's I and II to make the kind of joyous space opera that, of all six, only "A New Hope" managed to be.

Lucas however, can do myth very, very well. And once Lucas gets around to telling the Myth Of Anakin's Fall, the real story that Episode I and II have been leading to, everything works. Here we have the George Lucas of "The Empire Strikes Back" and "The Return of the Jedi." Hayden Christiansen goes from a pretty (if ineffectual) actor to being the tragic Darth Vader, and you believe. Darth Sidious is the villain that Darth Vader was in the original trilogy. Better perhaps, more sinister. The fall of Anakin is completely and utterly believable. I was shocked. I understood why he fell to the Dark Side. It's called the freakin' Dark Side for goodness sake! How could you freakin' fall?

Because of a tempter. Because of dark dreams. Because of love.

I don't want to spoil anything for those of you who, like me, went in not knowing exactly how it all happened. Some have always known the story, and are just watching it play out; some of us have willfully ignored the spoilers, and waited.

But I will say this for those who do know what happens. When order 66 is given, my breath was taken away. When the final battles occur, I was truly fearful. In other words, he doesn't screw it up.

I'm going to see it again.

Jamie also saw Revenge of the Sith, but it doesn't seem like he saw quite the same film. His thoughts:

I heard it might be good, so I tried to like it. I really did. Revenge of the Sith is one of the worst movies I've seen recently. It's Battlefield Earth bad.

It's not just that when Lucas tries to "do" myth he generates a world populated by generics. Nor is it just that the plot is absurdly thin (the movie exists to showcase the galaxy's most complete betrayal ever, brought on by two dreams and a promise from someone who couldn't be more obviously untrustworthy if he were twirling a mustache).

This movie is terrible first, because Lucas writes unbearable dialogue, especially in romantic scenes. And since the motivator is romantic love, we get a lot of bad lines. Remember "I don't like sand"? Episode III one-ups that. The climactic emotional moment, I swear to God, is a rip-off of Homer Simpson.

And second, Hayden Christensen is a lousy actor. There, I said it. Even with the silly script, Ewan McGregor is fine, and Natalie Portman brings life to a few scenes, but Anakin gets not a single believable moment. Even when all he has to do is look sideways, he's more fake than a losing high school forensics team. He's wooden like community-college Acting 101. I could go on.

Best I can say is that Jar-Jar doesn't speak. The special effects are there, and since they cover every square inch of the screen constantly, you will get many per unit time per dollar. If you like that kind of thing, you're going to go see it anyway, so enjoy.

Thanks go to erikharrison for his take on the movie.

165 of 1,265 comments (clear)

  1. Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Seriously, put a robot in the hangar bay, it plugs in, then NETWORK OWNED! you can open any jail cell, tell exactly where the prisoner are, open any door and even control the elevators.

    The Empire should look into using firewalls.

    1. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by null+etc. · · Score: 5, Funny
      Seriously, put a robot in the hangar bay, it plugs in, then NETWORK OWNED! you can open any jail cell, tell exactly where the prisoner are, open any door and even control the elevators.

      The Empire should look into using firewalls.

      Well, what you forgot is that R2D2 is equipped with buffer overflow exploits that take advantage of Windows -59768 B.C. (remember, it happened a long time ago, in a galaxy far away (but not long ago enough or far away enough to elude Bill Gate's grasp (Ah, so that's how Emperor Palpatine/Bill Gates came into power.)))

    2. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by Allison+Geode · · Score: 5, Funny

      because it happened long ago and far away. so long ago, and far away, in fact, that their idea of 'network security' is sending two super battle droids to take down whoever is hacking their network.

    3. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by Have+Blue · · Score: 4, Funny

      I think the Empire's problem is more one of physical security. I mean, does anyone ever actually watch the tapes from the holographic cameras all over the Jedi temple or Palpatine's office? Does anyone besides Obi-Wan even know they're there?

    4. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by ocbwilg · · Score: 3, Funny

      The Empire should look into using firewalls.

      I'm willing to at least give them credit for not using WEP though.

    5. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by Fishstick · · Score: 5, Insightful

      I've always been bugged by this as well.

      "There. Plug in. He should be able to interpret the entire imperial network!"

      On the Death Star, in a control room overlooking a hangar bay where you berth captured freighters -- no, you reply completely on physical security. The assumption is that untrusted clients will never physically be able to access the network port.

      This is the understandable hubris of the empire. It is inconceivable that enemy forces will be able to board your small-moon-sized space station and start poking around looking for the location of defense controls or which prisoner is where.

      This is the same kind of thinking that leads to fatal-flaw design like a physical defense that assumes large-scale assault where smaller ships can easily slip through. What? A thermal exhaust port leading directly to the main reactor? Oh, don't worry -- the concept that enemies would attack with small fighters is so far-fetched that we don't have to worry about it.

      --

      There is much cruelty in the universe, John.
      Yeah, we seem to have the tour map.

    6. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by Infinityis · · Score: 3, Informative

      Actually, you listed the wrong version of Windows...saying -59768 B.C. is a double negative, like -(-59768) A.D.

      It's either -59768 A.D. or it's 59768 B.C.

      Is it safe to assume were the source of a few Y2K bugs as well?

    7. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by null+etc. · · Score: 4, Funny
      Actually, you listed the wrong version of Windows...saying -59768 B.C. is a double negative, like -(-59768) A.D.

      It's either -59768 A.D. or it's 59768 B.C.

      Hey, bring that up with the marketing folks.

    8. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny
      ... Bill Gates came into power.)))
      You're a LISP programmer aren't you?
    9. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by DA-MAN · · Score: 4, Funny

      Seriously, put a robot in the hangar bay, it plugs in, then NETWORK OWNED! you can open any jail cell, tell exactly where the prisoner are, open any door and even control the elevators.

      If you noticed, all of the robots had a personality (most had more personality than Hayden Christensen). Seems to me like R2 was probably doing social attacks against the computers involved.

      --
      Can I get an eye poke?
      Dog House Forum
    10. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by ScoLgo · · Score: 2, Funny

      "It's either -59768 A.D. or it's 59768 B.C."

      <pedantic>
      In the current earthly year of 2005 A.D., 59768 B.C. equates to -61806 A.D. (give or take ~30 days ;-)
      </pedantic>

      (Score:-1, Whatever)

      --
      "Michael, I did nothing. I did absolutely nothing - and it was everything that I thought it could be."
    11. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by lordofthechia · · Score: 2, Funny

      At least the empire isn't as silly as say some other alien races that leave an open wireless port with upload priveleges and complete access to their whole network.

      Like they never forsaw a dorky guy flying within range of their unprotected network in an 50 year old ship and taking it all down with a simple upload from an iBook.... Sheesh, who's *that* careless...

      --
      Georgia Tech, the leader in Chia(tm) technology.
    12. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by vsprintf · · Score: 3, Funny

      Seriously, put a robot in the hangar bay, it plugs in, then NETWORK OWNED! you can open any jail cell, tell exactly where the prisoner are, open any door and even control the elevators.

      Ahem. Please try to remember that the story takes place "a long time ago." That was before SP2. Geez, you people with no sense of history slay me.

    13. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by Badfysh · · Score: 3, Funny
      Because Artoo is a Maintenance Astro Droid...

      "Artoo! Why didn't you reroute power to the shields? Now we're all going to die!"

      "Beep beep da beep beepity beep"

      TRANSLATED

      "Because you didn't give me the network password you fucking idiot"

      --

      I was conned by an old man in a cloak. It turns out those *were* the droids I was looking for.

    14. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by mabhatter654 · · Score: 2, Interesting
      They switched bridges from the top spire to the front... it wasn't the same bridge.

      under fire AG can go out! in SW ships you have AG and initeral compensators... not entirely the same things. if AG goes down for a little bit, then the planet's gravity will "override" the ships until it gets back under control. remember, ships in SW are not in "orbit" like our primitive term.. they are in powered orbit... so they could have gravity affect the ship if something happens.

      As far as ships landing, it was a bit silly. I could see the "Destroyers" being much smaller than their New Hope counterparts... so they look small enough to be "landable". I always thought the Tantive was a corvete and it was always considered a landing craft. Comparing a jedi fighter would be a good case... when it "lands" on the tantive it's about 1/10 the overall leangth... versus the "destroyer" is's about 1/20 the leangth... remember they don't have hangers yet, but a covered bay...it's considerably smaller than a trade federation "donut" ship. Also, we burn thru at least 3 generations of ships in this movie... even the "greys" at the end are still several models earlier than the IMPS from new hope.

      This is fun...

    15. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by swv3752 · · Score: 2, Funny

      You mean R2 is really Mitnick?

      --
      Just a Tuna in the Sea of Life
    16. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by Kesh · · Score: 2, Funny

      I personally think that, if R2 were given a voice, he'd sound a lot like Marvin from HHGttG. So, when he plugged into the ship's computer, it just shut down out of depression and let him do what he wanted. ;)

    17. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by Moofie · · Score: 2, Funny

      Authorized intruders are to be bathed, oiled, and brought to my chamber.

      --
      Why yes, I AM a rocket scientist!
    18. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by xystren · · Score: 2, Interesting

      I've always been bugged by this as well.

      "There. Plug in. He should be able to interpret the entire imperial network!"


      Don't forget, R2D2 also had the complete technical plans for the Death Star. Those likely helped out.

    19. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by Onan · · Score: 2, Interesting


      (First off, I can't believe that I'm actually defending any part of this craptacular movie. But the ways in which it was craptastic are different, so I'll at least give it its due.)

      Palpatine seemed to have a look of concentration at a few points during the controlled crash. I got the impression that he was probably using his abilities to control their descent as much as he could without giving himself away to the jedi.

    20. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by identity0 · · Score: 4, Funny

      Shit, now you have me imagining a Matrix-esque meeting between the enraged Sith Lord Darth Vader and some donut-chomping McSecurity guard...

      Guard: "Please put all metal objects in the tray, and step through the metal detector."
      *beep beep beep* *Bzzzrow*(sound of lightsaber being drawn)
      Guard: "Oh, shi-* *urk*"
      (Vader force-slams guard)
      Vader: "Every goddamn day I came here, you made me take off my metal hand, and checked my ID, despite me being the Jedi Knight hero of the republic... did that make you feel good, punk?"
      Guard: "ohshitohshitohshitohshit"
      Vader: "Hmm, let's see if I can do Obi-Wan's mind tricks. These are not the lightsabers you're looking for."
      (Vader force-chokes guard)
      Guard: "*Ack*- gasp-"
      Vader: "You don't need to see my identification."
      Guard: "*Gurgle*...."
      *thud*
      Vader: "Hmm, I'm not sure it worked. It was fun, though. Goddamn, I love being Sith."

    21. Re:Why are Spaceships so easily OWNED? by zero_offset · · Score: 2, Informative

      Wrong. The calendar to which you refer was created around 525 AD by a Catholic monk named Dionysius Exiguus, who was attempting to calculate an accurate date for Easter. The sort of people who concern themselves with things like this believe his numbers were incorrect, and that The Man was born around 8BC (with other estimations placing it as late as 4BC). Another monk named Bede was trying to work out these descrepancies (I think around 725) and apparently concluded there wasn't "room" for a year zero if the known BC dates were to be reconciled with the known AD dates. Naturally, it's all much more complex than what I'm going to write in a slashdot post, but in any case, it is utterly unrelated to the Romans not having a zero in their numbering system.

      --

      Slashdot quality declines as the number of hot grits posts decreases. - Provolt's Law, Apr-09-2005

  2. About the childhood... by eznihm · · Score: 5, Insightful

    ... an interesting quote from the author of Darthside:

    When we were kids we used to "play Star Wars", which is a kind of no-fee intellectual property union we entered unto with Lucasfilm whereby our imaginations were ignited in exchange for our fealty as future consumers.

    --
    -- i drop mine in braille so you blind cats can read me
    1. Re:About the childhood... by Golias · · Score: 5, Insightful

      In 1977, the Western was considered by many to be a dead genre which was once embedded into the culture.

      Kids my age at that time were still playing "cowboys and indians" in their backyards, just as their older siblings and parents had, but stories set in the Old West just didn't seem to connect to people anymore (that, or else Hollywood just forgot how to make them connect.)

      Lucas wanted to make a genre picture which became part of our culture's "shared mythology" the way Hopalong Cassidy and The Lone Ranger once did. There was nothing like that at all in the late 60s and early 70s.

      It worked really well. Most kids these days would much rather have a "Mace Windu Lightsaber" than a "pearl handled silver" cap gun.

      I would not be surprised if Lucas considers the fact that kids now "play Star Wars" in their back yards (as we did, post-1977) to be his greatest triumph.

      --

      Information wants to be anthropomorphized.

  3. How does Eps I-III Alter the Viewing of Eps IV-VI? by Trillian_1138 · · Score: 4, Interesting

    I am both a Star Wars geek and a performance/theatre geek, a dangerous combination which leads to over-analysis. Since seeing Episode III earlier today, I've been thinking a lot about how the presentation of Episodes I through III alter Episodes IV-VI. "Star Wars," as a single story told through film (ignoring books/videogames/comics/fan films/etc), now functions in six episodes tied together by numerous characters and over-arcing story threads. So how does this single narrative affect how Episodes IV-VI should be viewed?

    For example, one of the great things about Ep. IV-VI was discovering Luke and Leia's relationship and that Vader is their father. The problem is, this only works as a dramatic issue for the audience (obviously it still works for the characters) if the audience doesn't know those things going in. Now, it's not an unreasonable assumption to say that everybody seeing Star Wars (even for the first time) already knows those things. But as an artistic work (granting the "Star Wars" films the status of 'art') Lucas removed a large dramatic moment of the story as a whole. Likewise, the way Lucas has set up the over-arcing 6-ilogy (sexilogy?) now places more emphasis on Anakin Skywalker's rise, fall, and redemption (and in some ways, parallel journeys by Obi-Wan and Yoda) than about the adventures of Luke, Leia, etc in IV-VI.

    What does the Slashdot crowd think? Ignoring the actual presentation of Episodes I-III, was the very idea flawed, and does it do damage to the structure of Eps. IV-VI? Does the new over-arcing story cary enough value to disregard the problems it creates? Am I just over-thinking this way too much?
    -Trillian

  4. Another great review: by XanC · · Score: 4, Interesting
    http://www.decentfilms.com/reviews/starwars3.html

    The main site has a lot of Star Wars stuff on the front page: http://www.decentfilms.com/index.html

    An interesting excerpt:

    The problem with Yoda's ethic of detachment is that it's dead contrary to the unabashed humanism with which the whole story ends in Return of the Jedi, where human attachments -- filial loyalty, paternal bonds -- ultimately save the galaxy, destroy the Sith and the Empire, and redeem Anakin' lost soul. Yoda and Obi-Wan consistently counsel Luke (and, in the prequels, Anakin) against the very bonds that finally lead to the triumph of good over evil.

    In the end, alas, the Jedi do seem too "narrow" and "dogmatic," not the great sages Lucas presumably wanted them to be. Perhaps the "prophecy of the one who will bring balance to the Force" was misinterpreted after all: Perhaps the prophecy was really fulfilled not by Anakin destroying the Sith order, but by Luke humanizing the Jedi ethic.

    1. Re:Another great review: by null+etc. · · Score: 2, Funny
      Yoda does not counsel Luke to break his bonds with Padme.

      But Luke never knew his mother!

    2. Re:Another great review: by McDiesel · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Just because filial bonds lead to triumph in Return of the Jedi does NOT mean that Yoda gave bad advice in Revenge of the Sith. If Annakin had listened to Yoda and just for once not been driven by his desire to save Padme, then he might have been able to avoid the following:

      1) Padme's death;
      2) The rise of the Empire and the destruction of the Republic;
      3) The destruction of the Jedi order;
      4) The rise of the Sith;

    3. Re:Another great review: by GrouchoMarx · · Score: 4, Interesting

      In the end, alas, the Jedi do seem too "narrow" and "dogmatic," not the great sages Lucas presumably wanted them to be. Perhaps the "prophecy of the one who will bring balance to the Force" was misinterpreted after all: Perhaps the prophecy was really fulfilled not by Anakin destroying the Sith order, but by Luke humanizing the Jedi ethic.

      Precisely! One thing that Ep. III touches on (and the DarthSide blog, one of the greatest SW fanfics ever, expands on) is that the Light and Dark side of the Force is NOT "good" and "bad". It's "life exists, let it be" vs "life exists, if you can take it by the horns you can make it a better place". The Jedi had long ago rejected the Dark Side completely on "power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely" grounds. The Sith, a specific small order of Dark Jedi, fully embraced the "control and order" aspect of the Force but were corrupted by it.

      Luke, in the final battle with the Emperor and Vader in Ep. VI, is able to use his anger (dark side thing) to defeat Vader, but has the strength of will to pull back and not be tempted and corrupted by the power. (Parallel to Anakin vs. Tyranus, with the same person cheer-leading in both cases.) Why? Because he sees the growing parallel between himself and his father when he cuts off Vader's hand, and he realizes where that path leads. Sidious is about to kill him for it, when Vader (that prophesy dude) realizes what he has become and sacrifices himself to kill Sidious and end the Sith line. He sees that in his son is the true balance in the Force, and ensures that it is not destroyed prematurely.

      The Force is already unbalanced with the Jedi, since they eschew the other branch of the Force completely. By bringing it back into balance, the light and dark sides are both recognized and accepted. Not something Mace Windu and Yoda would really have wanted, but but the end, Yoda's ghost seems to have come to terms with it.

      My issue with Star Wars is that the overarching story concept (the above, at least as I see it), is AMAZINGLY GOOD! The actual execution is at best spotty, and at worst talks about sand. Still, stuff like the DarthSide blog, the fan stuff, really redeems a lot of it. Lucas has great ideas, but should leave the execution to someone else.

      --

      --GrouchoMarx
      Card-carrying member of the EFF, FSF, and ACLU. Are you?

    4. Re:Another great review: by Rallion · · Score: 2, Interesting

      The novel is fantastic, really, isn't it? I have to wonder how much of the stuff in there (that wasn't in the film) was a result of Lucas, and how much was purely the creation of the author.

      In the novel, the fight with Tyrannus is brilliant. Seeing the version that they put on the screen was a letdown. I didn't expect to be able to see Tyrannus thinking his way through the battle, of course, but still, a good 10 pages in the book were reduced to about a minute of screen time.

      It was also disappointing to find that the best humor in the book (particularly a much less over-the-top version of Obi-Wan's wry sense of humor, which Ewan McGregor obviously tried valiantly to save despite some of his mediocre lines) was completely missing in the film. When Grievous said, "I was trained by Count Dooku himself!" (or similar) I braced myself to smile at Obi-Wan's reply, "Well, I trained the man who killed him." And then, it simply wasn't there.

    5. Re:Another great review: by Austerity+Empowers · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Actually it would seem from Ep 3 that Mace Windu is acquainted with acting in anger, remember how close we were to being emperor free.

      Anyway I agree with your conclusions, I just felt like Lucas really intended for this level of complexity, he could have made the statement more powerfully. Maybe I saw Ep 6 too young, but I barely grasped Luke's use of the dark side. I always imagined he got angry, acted in anger, and then turned away. He was, in my mind, dangerously close but in the end controlled himself.

      Rather than the goofup that was episode 1, Lucas could have focused more on the faults of the Jedi. They do draw a strong parallel to certain churches (and eastern religions). On one hand they view themsleves as protectors of freedom, and champions of the people, yet they are isolated from them, and act independently. They are so selfless, they may not know what they're fighting for. They do not take spouses, they are selected as babies (before they are drawn in by the trappings of the society they live in). Really they're so different and incompatible with society, they're hard to believe as protectors.

      Anyway Ep 3 was OK and I thought the only thing Lucas got right was the Conversion of Anakin Skywalker. Everything else was a loss, and Obiwan + Palpatine carried the show. Many things didn't work, plus how Anakin goes from being on the fence about Palpatine (and turns him over to the Jedi), to marching in to the Jedi academy and killing children is WAY too much for me to swallow. I accept that he would eventaully have turned into that, but it was too quick and too total.

      I think the entirety of episodes 1-3 should have been the fall of Anakin & the rise of the empire. Less Jarjar'ism and more exposition. And for God's sake, get some real writers and a good director. Hayden LOOKED the part of Vader, but there's something to say for acting it too...

  5. Extremes... by Jhon · · Score: 5, Insightful

    To Harrison: It wasn't THAT good.

    to Jamie: It wasn't THAT bad.

    I saw it. It was worth the price of admission, a soda and nachos. More importantly, it was worth my TIME, which to me is infinately more valuable.

    1. Re:Extremes... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny
      It was worth the price of admission, a soda and nachos.
      Holy crap, it MUST be good.
    2. Re:Extremes... by LordRPI · · Score: 2, Funny

      Only the Sith speak in extremes.

    3. Re:Extremes... by WaterBreath · · Score: 5, Interesting

      Again, no one in the theator seemed to notice.

      I'd guess no one else in the theater cared. Let's face it, if you were so disappointed by episodes 1 and 2, why did you even bother to see 3? Same reason everyone else did: closure. The difference between you and everyone else in the theater though was that you were determined going in that this was going to be a bad movie and you just wanted to get the last few story elements out and be done with it. Going in I was scared it was going to be like ep. 1. But I came out more than relieved. Fully satisfied, one might say.

      Personally, I was less than impressed with ep. 1, but I didn't think it was terrible. I thought ep. 2 was better. The romantic scenes were very annoying, because Lucas can't write good emotional dialogue and Hayden Christiansen can't emote realistic emotion (except for whiny discontent). However, I loved everything else about ep. 2. And after seeing ep. 3, I have a new appreciation for the romantic scense. Ep. 3 wouldn't have made any sense at all without them. It's utterly necessary that Anakin actually has a reason for his fear.

      Ep. 3 was awesome, IMHO. On par with the first 3. Maybe better just because it was dire, so tragic, and looked so good. Moreso of all three than eps. 4-6 were able to achieve. Plus, it answered so many questions I hadn't even realized I had! Now I know why the Jedi shun emotion and attachment. Now I know why the Sith are so dangerous, and why they can get rational people to support them despite that.

      Anyway, like I said, it was awesome. I may have to go see it again in the theater, which I don't do often.

    4. Re:Extremes... by TechniMyoko · · Score: 2, Funny
      Why do driod have to talk amongst each other? They are ROBOTS, couldn't they, you know, wifi it or soemthing?

      Thats what I always wondered, ever since hearing a transformer yell out commands to himself

    5. Re:Extremes... by CrayDrygu · · Score: 2, Insightful
      Why do driod have to talk amongst each other? They are ROBOTS, couldn't they, you know, wifi it or soemthing?

      I could go into all sorts of reasons why it really is plausible, but honestly, it's a freakin' movie. If you're looking for that sort of accuracy, I suggest you stay away from SciFi (note that "Fi" is short for "Fiction" btw) and simply stick to documentaries.

      --

      --
      "I personal[ly] think Unix is "superior" because on LSD it tastes like Blue." -- jbarnett

    6. Re:Extremes... by glitchvern · · Score: 2, Interesting
      Personally, I was less than impressed with ep. 1, but I didn't think it was terrible. I thought ep. 2 was better. The romantic scenes were very annoying, because Lucas can't write good emotional dialogue and Hayden Christiansen can't emote realistic emotion (except for whiny discontent). However, I loved everything else about ep. 2. And after seeing ep. 3, I have a new appreciation for the romantic scense. Ep. 3 wouldn't have made any sense at all without them. It's utterly necessary that Anakin actually has a reason for his fear.

      Spoiler Warning ... Spoiler Warning

      Everyone says Lucas can't write good dialogue or direct very well, and after watching episode 2, I was inclined to agree, after all I've believed Natalie Portman was falling in love with guys in movies since she was 12, and episode 2 didn't convince. But after seeing episode 3, I'm not so sure. Considering that I was moved from revulsion of Anakin to pity for Vader by the dialog/acting in episode 3, "Master Skywalker there's too many of them. What do we do," and "Where is Padme? Is Padme safe," I think it might be a good idea to consider why the romantic scenes in episode 2 so utterly fail to convince.

      On the episode 2 dvd, there are some deleted scenes between Anakin and Padme, that I think really would have added to the movie in helping to explain why exactly she was falling in love with Anakin. Also in the audio commentary during the scene where Anakin is "surfing" on the creature, the special effects guy says he knew immediately when Lucas told him about it it would be the hardest scene to do, and he tried to get Lucas to cut it, but Lucas wanted the scene in. The special effects guy almost seemed to be apologizing for the scene. Anakin's "surfing" really does look pretty fake. I think that knocked out people's suspension of disbelief, and is why the scene is so weak. I also think it's pretty clear the film needs a scene like that right about there, it's just been done badly. They should have redone that scene as something more visually believable.

      I think episode 3 is the best movie of both trilogies, my previous favorite being Jedi. Sith makes Vader a very tragic figure, he's ruined not just his own life, but the lives of everyone he cares about for ultimately nothing. His actions destroy the very thing he is trying to save. Like I said before my previous favorite was Jedi not Empire the typical favorite. I don't usually like "dark" films. I generally want everything to work out in the end, but Sith is in my opinion such a great tragedy that it is my favorite of the films.
  6. Human physics by uchi · · Score: 4, Insightful

    While I thought the special effects were astounding in Episode III, I felt something was sorely lacking with the physics when applied to humans. It seemed as if he didn't even try to make it seem realistic.
    For example, when Obi Wan and Anakin were fighting Dooku near the beginning, Dooku decided to do a flip off of a balcony type thing to get to the lower level. This looked horrible. There was no acceleration invovled in his fall, and his flip randomly sped up slightly while in mid air. Of course, he was a Jedi master, so he can probably do that, but I really doubt they had that in mind when creating that scene. Did anyone else notice examples of this?

    1. Re:Human physics by jamie · · Score: 3, Interesting
      Did anyone else notice examples of this?

      Yes. Every scene where anyone did anything like that.

      Which is to say, most of the movie. In Spiderman 1 and 2 the defying-physics stuff actually worked because it gave Spiderman a kind of half-alien insecty twitch. Every CG actor in Sith, flipping and flying around, just looked CG.

      The fight choreography was terrible too. Whether in close quarters or the middle of an empty room, apparently light-saber fights look identical, nothing but big flashy sweeping strokes. Compare to the trailer swordfight in Kill Bill 2, or the bathroom martial arts combat in Unleashed.

    2. Re:Human physics by DavidNWelton · · Score: 4, Funny

      I liked the bit in the opening space shoot em up where R2 kills the bad droid that is latched onto someone's fighter craft, and the dead droid hulk is slowly "blown" backwards and off the spaceship, presumably by "space wind"?

    3. Re:Human physics by BeeRockxs · · Score: 4, Informative

      AFAIR, the battle takes place in the upper atmosphere, not in space.

  7. Viewing Order by XanC · · Score: 5, Interesting
    You can't start at the beginning, because all of the others rely on the introductions in 4. Episode 1 assumes you know what the "force" is, for example, whereas Obi-Wan explains it to us in 4. And many of the twists in the original trilogy are presented neatly and cleanly in the prequels. My current thinking is that the best order is:

    4, 5, 1, 2, 3, 6

    So that after "Empire", at the end of which Vader reveals he's Luke's father, we take a detour and get to the back-story: where he came from, the source of the Rebellion and the Empire, and his fall to the dark side.

    It's all leading up to the climactic finish where the prequels allow us to better appreciate the scope of the triumph: the Sith destroyed, republican government reinstated, and Anakin redeemed.

    1. Re:Viewing Order by XanC · · Score: 2, Insightful
      True. You're going to have to lose something, no matter what.

      Personally, I'm willing to sacrifice some of the weight of that revelation in order to save the ending of the whole story for the end.

    2. Re:Viewing Order by kmcneely · · Score: 2, Insightful

      You still get that moment at the end of Episode III though, so it's not lost entirely.

  8. NOOO by u-238 · · Score: 5, Insightful

    This is what Lucas had to say about Yoda, when they introduced him in The Empire Strikes Back:

    That was like a real leap

    beacuse if that puppet had not worked

    the whole film would have been down the tubes

    it just, you know woulda been a disaster, it would've been a silly little muppet...

    the whole movie would've collapsed under the weight of it.


    (quote from the bonus feature DVD in the original trilogy box set)

    Now, apply this quote to what Hayden Christensen has done to Darth Vader, one of the most memorable and recognizable villains in all of cinema history, and what do you get?

    1. Re:NOOO by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

      I never could take Yoda seriously because he sounded too much like Grover (same muppeteer).

  9. Death Star by iriefrank · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Is it me, or is the Death Star shown at the end of Episode III way too complete? At the beginning of Episode IV, there is some doubt about whether the station is fully operational, but there is a full skeleton of the Death Star visible at the end of III. Surely this is a mistake, just for continuity's sake. The DS could not have taken 16-18 years (as long as it takes Luke and Leia to grow up) to complete!

    1. Re:Death Star by Glonoinha · · Score: 4, Funny

      Insiders know that the Death Star you see getting started in Episode III is the one they outsourced. Sixteen years later it was still basically a clusterfuq, way over budget and late as hell but management decided to go live with it, against the protests of the totally skilled local Imperial Base Makers (who claim that the outsource companies don't know a damn thing about building Death Stars.)

      Wait until Episode IV to see how well it holds up. Everybody (ie, the local Imperial Base Makers with experience and professional training) knows to put in defenses against snub fighters, so that shouldn't be a problem.

      --
      Glonoinha the MebiByte Slayer
    2. Re:Death Star by BoneFlower · · Score: 5, Interesting

      Possibilities:

      That wasn't the Death Star, but a smaller scale prototype device to test out some of the technologies and construction techniques.

      It was the Death Star, but due to the newness of the technology involved, it took a great deal of time to construct, much more time than Death Star II, which was simply a somewhat bigger example of the same technology. Real world parralel here- the first time you built a computer, it probably took a lot longer than it would take you now right?

      Possible parralel with the Babylon project in Babylon 5- it took them quite some time to get a working station. Perhaps the Death Star was beset by engineering failures and sabotage along the way before they finally got one operational? As mentioned above, new things take longer to build than new examples of old things, simply because it is new. Compound this by running into unexpected engineering or construction failures, or sabotage, and things can take very long indeed.

      Palpatine didn't disband the Senate until A New Hope. Presumably, the Senate did have some power over the budget and policy until then- not as much as it used to, but some. To divert funds for such a large secret project would raise lots of questions among fairly powerful individuals. They simply couldn't divert funds to get it done any faster than 15-20 years without tipping off the Senate, which may have still had the authority and/or influence to take down Palpatine, or at least make his rule more difficult. The second Death Star, however, would not be created under those restrictions. Palpatine had unlimited authority by that point, and if he wanted to divert fifty billion credits for a battle station, he could do so and just kill anyone that asked why.

      It was the Death Star, but not right after the previous scene- a flash forward scene to the construction project a few years prior to the Battle of Yavin.

    3. Re:Death Star by benjaminchoate · · Score: 3, Funny

      Actually the first 3 death stars were destroyed in episodes 3.3, 3.6 and 3.9 during the wacky adventures of Nimrod Bangalore: Rebel Extroardinaire, and his zany sidekick Jumba-Jumba! Watch as plot holes are patched and everything finally makes sense! This is what you've finally been waiting for!

    4. Re:Death Star by Infinityis · · Score: 2, Interesting

      I agree with the last possibilty the most likely. Seeing as how the Star Destroyers at the end of III looked different compared to earlier in the movie, and that the uniforms and deck layouts were different as well, I think it is a safe assumption that much time has passed between scenes.

    5. Re:Death Star by dragondm · · Score: 2, Informative

      I believe it's Star Wars cannon that there was a prototype Death Star built as a testbed before the the "first" DS seen in Ep. IV

      I suspect that what was shown at the end of ep. III was the prototype.

      --
      -- -- The Dragon De Monsyne
    6. Re:Death Star by Malor · · Score: 2, Insightful

      You gotta realize, that even by Empire standards, the Death Star is unimaginably huge. It would be a titanic feat of engineering to build it. Consider: the Earth has a huge amount of iron in it... if the Death Star were made out of iron, it would require stripping away like a SIXTH of the Earth's ENTIRE MASS to build it. (those numbers are, admittedly, pulled out of thin air and are guesses, but I think they're in the right size range).

      Now, they'd probably go get asteroids and use those, and they'd probably have an enormous assembly fleet, but it would still be an unbelievable amount of work. Doing it in just 20 years would strain even a Galactic Empire. And having the skeleton built is about 0.01% of the whole job. Consider houses... they'll have the frame up in a couple days, but it still takes six months to build. Compare that to the enormous internal volume of a Death Star versus its relatively small surface area.

      The fact that they had a second largely built in just a few more years strikes me as far less believable than the long timeframe to do the first. They would almost have to have started it halfway through the first project.

      Rome wasn't built in a day, and I very much doubt the Death Star was built in a decade.

    7. Re:Death Star by Mechcozmo · · Score: 2, Informative
      That IS a prototype Death Star. It was built at the Maw facility, a top-secret place surrounded by black holes. It was so remote and secretive they did not know the Emperor was dead until Han Solo and Chewie stuble upon a recon ship the Maw sends out and are captured about 17 years after Endor.

      The prototype was smaller and much less powerful. That was where the super-laser was first designed and perfected. The first REAL Death Star was built around a prison world, using the prisoners as slave labor. After construction was done, there was so much debris in the atmosphere that resupply ships could not get to the prison. And the prisoners couldn't hunt for food because the jungles that surrounded the prison were filled with nasty animals. Eat you alive and stuff.

      The Second Death Star, BTW, had millimeter wide heat dispersion vents instead of the proton-torpedo sized one on the original. It was also increased in size to allow for more of those vents.

      It took longer for the first one to be built because of the prisoner/slave laborers. The second was built with storm-trooper construction crews and droids, so it went faster. Both took a while though... and the second one was only about 60% completed. The living quarters for the crew weren't built yet, only enough for the construction crews to live in were done. The weapons system had a higher priority than the living quarters. Go figure.

      The Star Destroyers that you see in the movie are Victory-class Star Destroyers. They are smaller and can enter an atmosphere. The Imperial-class Star Destroyers are larger and cannot enter an atmosphere. There is an Imperial II-class Star Destroyer that went into production shortly after Yavin. The Super-class Star Destroyer is 9 km long (1 km for an Imperial) and, "bankrupted an entire system" according to one of the books. 4 total built, all destroyed but 1 which was captured by the New Republic.

      Leia's adoptive father and mother were the King and Queen of Alderaan. That's why the dad is in the Senate (and later Leia). They are the Royal Family. Luke gets it in the shorts and is stuck on the armpit of the galaxy.

  10. My biggest complaint was the timecode by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Lucas doesn't realize that just because you have new technologies available, they are going to add to the storytelling. So we have new high-resolution timers? That doesn't mean we want to see counters all over the action and getting in the way of the actors faces! We didn't need big counters in the original trilogy. Anyone that paid to see this in a theater must feel terribly deceived.

    1. Re:My biggest complaint was the timecode by DaNasty · · Score: 2, Informative

      mplayer -aspect 2.35 -dvd-device ./ dvd://1

      --
      Wanna get nasty? - DaNasty
  11. this feels like *the* one to watch. by baryon351 · · Score: 2, Interesting

    This might be just wishful thinking from someone who sat through A New Hope forcing myself to watch it... and only mildly enjoying the next two. Eps I and II felt like an excuse for special effects, with only Obi Wan being a character I was attached to, but episode III - the beginnings of darth vader, the first things he does as Ol' Evil One... that's worth seeing I think.

    I'm not a huge fan, probably not even a fan fullstop, but I find some parts of the movies attractive, and vader is *it*.

  12. Dilema with my Young Kids by syntap · · Score: 4, Interesting

    I have two kids, under age 5. Of course most of us saw the trilogies in the order 4-5-6-1-2-3. When the kids are old enough, should we maintain that order or do we show it to them in 1-2-3-4-5-6 order?

    The reason we had to watch it in our order is obvious, but do the benefits we had in watching the films in that order cascade to the younger generations? What order will people watch them in five or ten years from now?

    1. Re:Dilema with my Young Kids by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      The proper order should be, 4-5-6 and maybe 3.

    2. Re:Dilema with my Young Kids by bcrowell · · Score: 4, Insightful

      The best viewing order is 4.

    3. Re:Dilema with my Young Kids by justin12345 · · Score: 5, Informative

      Watch out, this movies isn't exactly kid friendly. When they say its dark and violent, they mean its dark and violent for a movie, not just a star wars movie.

      I remember when I was a kid I couldn't watch the carbonite sequence in Empire because I found it too scary and upsetting (I was about 7 or so). Maybe I am just a huge wuss, but the Vader transformation in Ep III would have terrified me for years if I had seen it then. Its horrific.

      Just a word of caution.

      --
      Cool art gallery, if you're into that sort of thing.
    4. Re:Dilema with my Young Kids by lordofthechia · · Score: 2, Funny

      "the Vader transformation in Ep III would have terrified me for years"

      I also found the Vader transformation scene quite horrific, I remember rising from my seat in a stupor shoting "Noooooo!" when I saw it....

      --
      Georgia Tech, the leader in Chia(tm) technology.
    5. Re:Dilema with my Young Kids by fyrie · · Score: 2, Informative

      That was one of the things that bothered me about this movie. Is it kid friendly or not, and if it is not kid friendly, then why add all the campiness that is intended for kids. The film had the dark vibe going on, but Lucas kept adding the campy, lighthearted bad guy comedy (something Tolkien did in his books to tame the Orcs and Goblins down, which the LotR screenplay did away with). The previews, at least in the theater I saw it at, were of opposite ends of the kid zone too. There were a couple CGI kids movie previews and then the preview for the "Smiths" which *might* be suitable for a 13 year old. I'm talking lots of cleavage (and other in your face sexuality elements), guns, family dysfunction, and things blowing up.

    6. Re:Dilema with my Young Kids by Dirtside · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Someone made the excellent suggestion that you should watch 4, 5, and then after we learn that Vader is Luke's father, jump back and watch 1-2-3 (or even just 3, since 1 and 2 really don't establish much that you can't relate in about two minutes:

      "The Jedi found this kid Anakin, who had extraordinary power, so they trained him as a Jedi. Later his mom died and he kinda flipped out. Meanwhile, the Chancellor (guy in charge of the Senate) was scheming to increase his power, and started a fake war so that the Senate would vote him emergency powers. And he's been keeping an eye on this Anakin kid. Now, let's watch Episode 3."

      --
      "Destroy science and religion. Science would re-emerge exactly the same; but not religion." - Penn Jillette, paraphrased
  13. Amputated Hand: Slice of Continuity by reporter · · Score: 3, Insightful
    The most poignant moment in "Return of the Jedi" occurs when Luke looks at his right hand just after slicing off the mechanized right hand of Darth Vader. At that moment, he recalls Obi-wan Kenobi's warning: "Don't give into hate. That leads to the dark side." (Obi-wan Kenobi gave that warning in "The Empire Strikes Back".)

    Luke immediately resolves to avoid the fate of Darth Vader and turns off his light saber. Luke then looks at the emperor and refuses to join him.

    Did George Lucas provide a scene (in "Revenge of the Sith") where Darth Vader's own right hand was sliced off? If the answer is "yes", then Lucas has remained true to the original trilogy.

    "Such insight, you have. The first steps to Jedi Knight, you have taken." observers Yoda.

  14. I, for one by WormholeFiend · · Score: 4, Insightful

    didn't like it.

    I knew before going in, from what other people told me and from what I read online, that the acting was very bad, to the point of laughing during drama scenes, but I went to see it anyway just for the effects and the lightsaber battles.

    Generally speaking I found the lightsaber duels too cluttered, without much definition in each move sequence.

    A Darth Maul vs Qui-Gon Jinn style of fight choreography should have been used... IMO it's the best lightsaber duel of them all.

    1. Re:I, for one by ocbwilg · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Generally speaking I found the lightsaber duels too cluttered, without much definition in each move sequence.

      A Darth Maul vs Qui-Gon Jinn style of fight choreography should have been used... IMO it's the best lightsaber duel of them all.


      Yup, me too. And the reason why is that those two duels were done entirely with real people really fighting it out (well, mock-fighting it out). They didn't have tons of CG-animated bodies flipping nad flopping and twirling around and doing super-impossible "only mad Jedi skillz could accomplish this" feats.

      Don't get me wrong, the CGI Yoda duels obviously have to be done digitally, but for everything else you're just upping the cheese and distraction factor.

    2. Re:I, for one by Sark666 · · Score: 3, Insightful

      Totally agree. The darth maul fight is one of the best fights I've ever seen in any film. Then in ep II the fights seem to slow down again, I attributed this to using christopher lee and you could tell his face was plastered on someone for some of the fights. I couldn't tell that this time around but as others have pointed out, the cg transistions were bad like with dooku and the fights were just fast and spazzy for lack of a better word.

      I am a huge fan as many of you here. Grew up on star wars, saw the first 10 times when I was 7, saw empire 34 times in it's first run, I was obsessed with empire and it is my best movie experience ever. Then I saw Return only once. A part of my childhood died that day. So many things wrong with return, but this is more on the new movie. Well, it's been all downhill ever since.

      The only thing that takes me there is during the star wars logo at the beginning and the opening crawl. And I really wanted to believe george got it right this time, but it just ain't so.

      Besides the bad dialog, bad acting, and lack luster light saber fights, there is even a problem with the space battles. Just because you can put a million things on screen at once, doesn't mean you should. There are so many things wizzing around, which are way too colourful, and panning and 3d circle arounds etc. You need the grittiness, of the ships just looking grey. You need to subtract about 1000 ships. You need to lock the camera way more.

      It reminds of Jaws, Speilburg wanted to use the shark way more but due to technical problems, they had to rely on 'building up' the fear of the shark. Needless to say it was prefect. This is probably the best example of less is more.

      Someone needed to beat that lesson, and many other lessons, over george's head. But it's too late now, George shit the bed.

  15. Terrible reviews by Junior+J.+Junior+III · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Both of these reviews are terrible. They're worse than the movie. See the movie; it's good. It doesn't redeem Lucas's transgressions against the original trilogy when he Special-Ed'ed them, and it doesn't quite make up for the first two episodes of the new trilogy, but standing on its own, it's pretty decent. Not a perfect movie by any means, but no more flawed than either of the three original films.

    --
    You see? You see? Your stupid minds! Stupid! Stupid!
    1. Re:Terrible reviews by Tyler+Durden · · Score: 5, Insightful
      Not a perfect movie by any means, but no more flawed than either of the three original films.

      I thought it was more flawed than the original movies for one specific reason. In ROTS, I did not give one flying fuck what happened to any of the characters.

      The original movie had some believable characters, clever dialog, and this thing known as emotion that made you care about what happened. You could see a little bit of yourself in their attitudes and situations. As a kid, it made your imagination run wild so that you could daydream about you yourself being in Lucas's beautiful world.

      Not so in the prequels. Wooden characters with unbelievable stories reciting shitty dialog by actors unable to sell any of it - and for good reason. Any attempt to humanize the story in the prequels was laughably cheesy. "By God, Jar-Jar sucks. Oh look! A young Anakin single-handedly wiped out an entire fighting force by accident." And in this last movie we're supposed to care about these people? You simply cannot create a decent tragedy without characters worth feeling sorry for. When Anakin was burning up in lava with his limbs missing I did not care. When Padme died in child birth I did not care.

      These three movies amount to just one big wasted opportunity.

      --
      Happy people make bad consumers.
    2. Re:Terrible reviews by Tyler+Durden · · Score: 4, Insightful
      If Lucas had made the original Star Wars as lacking in emotional impact as episodes 1, 2 and 3 then it would have tanked. No other movies would have been made and you'd have no shitty prequels to defend. Period.

      And, by the way, want to know my opinion about the movie your handle's namesake is from?

      No. Not unless you give rational reasons for disliking it. However, you just call it "trash" without giving any reason why you felt that way. And seeing how you want to defend the Star Wars prequels, of all things, it would take a lot more than that to convince me that any of your opinions on movies are worth much of anything really.

      --
      Happy people make bad consumers.
  16. Re:But where did you watch it? by 91degrees · · Score: 5, Funny

    Please report to the nearest MPAA reprogramming station!

    They closed them all. The MPAA couldn't afford the upkeep because nobody is paying to see movies anymore.

  17. I didn't have high hopes about this but... by Andrew+Aguecheek · · Score: 4, Interesting

    SPOILER WARNING

    What annoyed me most was the inconsistancy. There were some moments that linked to the original trillogy rather well - Obi-Wan's "so uncivilised" comment about blasters for instance. But there are other aspects that made no sense.

    Chewie and Yoda were apparently aquaintances and yet the Wookie never mentioned this to Han, or if he did, despite the trust between the two of them, Han didn't consider it to be a reason to believe in the Force.

    Perhaps more grating however was the death of Padme - it was utterly unnecessary, Vader did not know if she was dead or not and so Palpatine could easily have lied and told him she was. More than that though, it contradicted Leia's recollections in Jedi - where she remembers her "real mother." It has been suggested that she remembers her through the force, but then, why doesn't Luke?

    Of course the other irritation with the film was the godawful dialogue. The "no I love you" "no I love you" scenes between Anakin and Padme, Vader lifting his head to the skies and shouting "NOOOOOOO!" Thankfully, Threepio's pun chip does seem to have been removed, and there's a dispute over whether or not Jar Jar spoke at all. (If he did it was only something along the lines of "excuse me")

    The effects were great though - aside from the lizard thing.

    --
    Tomorrow, I may eat another house plant
    1. Re:I didn't have high hopes about this but... by ghostunit · · Score: 3, Interesting

      If Padme hadn't died, Vader may have been able to feel her presence through the force or something. The real plot hole is that the emperor tells Vader he killed Padme in his rage. When he learns in ep4 that his sons are alive he should have realized that the emperor lied to him, since Padme wouldn't have delivered if he had killed her in Moustafar. And agreed, all the characters included for no reason such as Chewbacca, Jabba and the droids is lame and cause plot holes.

    2. Re:I didn't have high hopes about this but... by softspokenrevolution · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Yeah, the whole chronology never really made that much sense to me. People forgot about the Jedi and the force in about 18 years? What happeened to all the clone troopers, why did they stop using them in favor of the regular imperial storm troopers? Why is there such a massive shift in craft design after the empire?

    3. Re:I didn't have high hopes about this but... by The_Steel_General · · Score: 2, Insightful
      Spoilers still, on Padme's fate:

      Definitely agree with you, and more. As you said, it's difficult to tie to Leia's recollection. Her comments would have made more sense, and been more touching yet, if Padme had died of a broken heart just a couple of years later. But that's more of a fanboy nitpick.

      The real problem was that it wasn't fair to her character. This is a lady who managed to get elected queen and senator, has been politicking in the Senate for probably ten years, is no pushover, but she dies in a unusually short time over the end of an imperfect relationship. (Yes, I know the circumstances were more shocking than just "see ya later.")

      She was, to borrow from a character with a similar unexpected fate, "Boba-Fetted": Killed off before her time because she was no longer needed in the plot and without regard to her strengths. Sure, it tied in with Anakin's fears; yes, in a narrative way it makes sense; okay, he turned so completely as to be a serious shock. But I didn't believe it when it happened, and that's the problem there.

      TSG

    4. Re:I didn't have high hopes about this but... by wondafucka · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Actually the "No, I love you" "No, I love you" dialog was the most believable padme / anakin interaction. Have you ever seen young adults in love for the first time? If you sat in on a date between two sixteen year olds, you would laugh your ass off (granted the characters are older, but I've seen a few adults act this way as well).

    5. Re:I didn't have high hopes about this but... by eganloo · · Score: 2, Insightful
      Perhaps more grating however was the death of Padme - it was utterly unnecessary, Vader did not know if she was dead or not and so Palpatine could easily have lied and told him she was. More than that though, it contradicted Leia's recollections in Jedi - where she remembers her "real mother." It has been suggested that she remembers her through the force, but then, why doesn't Luke?


      Interestingly, the Return of the Jedi novelization wrote that "Luke claimed, 'I have no memory of my mother ..."--with the use of the word "claimed" implying that Luke was not telling Leia the entire truth ("from a certain point of view" of course. ;) to sidestep her question.

      In any case, Leia's quote in the ROTJ dialogue ("She died when I was very young" and "Just...images, really. Feelings.") is consistent with her only "knowing" her mother briefly (and not with real "memories" but "feelings") before she died, if only by being Force-sensitive.
    6. Re:I didn't have high hopes about this but... by CrazyTalk · · Score: 2, Insightful

      I saw Ep III twice - the first time I only noticed a (silent) jar-jar once, but during the second viewing noticed him in two scenes and clearly heard his "Excuse Me". The "Nooooo" was the worse moment in the entire film (and the only bordering on cringe-worthy, if you dont mind the cheesy love story dialog). I think it will rival "Khaaaaan" in the annals of bad sci-fi movie screams. Oh, and the Yoda/Chewie thing bothered me as well.

    7. Re:I didn't have high hopes about this but... by Let's+Kiosk · · Score: 2, Interesting

      My take on it is that Vader, believing the lie that he had killed Padme, lost his will to overthrow Palpatine and rule the galaxy -- without the woman for whom he sold his soul, what's the use? Plus his life now depends on this high-tech suit that the Emperor no doubt controls somehow (maybe a chip that can be switched off if he gets unruly), and Palpatine no doubt has some other Dark Side-related hold on to him. Also, Darth may not be strong enough to kill Palpatine by himself anymore.

      So in the intervening 16-20 years, Vader channels all his rage, hatred, guilt and self-loathing into becoming the baddest ass in the galaxy.

      Sometime between Eps 4 and 5, when Vader learns the identity of that protege of Obi-Wan's who destroyed the Death Star (hey, maybe the Empire should have been keeping a lookout for Skywalkers from Tatooine?), he indeed realizes that Palpatine had lied to him all those years before, and how much was stolen from him. That's when he renews his decision to overthrow the Emperor, but this time only if he can get his son to join him. Of course, he has to bide his time and make a big show to the Emperor of how willing he is to destroy his son.

      It certainly helps explains why he was so murderously anxious to find Luke in Ep 5. I wonder if he also spent any time secretly looking to find out if Padme was still alive?

  18. Jar jar rocks! by mok000 · · Score: 2, Funny

    Meese luuvs Jar Jar!!

  19. Not as good as I had hoped by TripMaster_Monky · · Score: 5, Funny

    For some reason there is a large timestamp running across the film. I guess Lucas wanted to add an air of suspense with that effect.

    --
    __________
    |rip/\/\aster /\/\onky
  20. Totaly redundant spoilers by FidelCatsro · · Score: 2

    Warning no real spoilers below*

    *Anakin skywalker becomes darth vade

    *Anakin/vader is luke and leias father

    *luke and leia are twins

    *chancilor palpatine is the empiror

    *Palpatine is Darth sidious

    *Yoda and Obi-wan survive

    *Senator Organa adopts leia

    *Yoda dosnt kill the empiror

    *Alot of jedi get killed

    *The republic ends

    *Obi-wan beats darth vaderv
    *Palpatine is a sith lord

    *Amidala is pregnant

    Honestly , my faith was restored in lucas after seeing the film , it was honestly a very enjoyable movie .
    The only bit that bugged me were the romantic scenes which are not really lucas's strong point

    --
    The only things certain in war are Propaganda and Death. You can never be sure which is which though
  21. the tattered remains of your childhood... by sssmashy · · Score: 5, Funny

    What has Lucas done to the possibly tattered remains of my childhood?

    Yeesh, I'm sick of people bitching that Lucas ruined their childhood fantasies with his subsequent movies.

    If a few hours of film constituted the emotional highlight of your childhood, I'd say you have bigger issues to worry about than Lucas or his imaginary universe.

    1. Re:the tattered remains of your childhood... by pixelgeek · · Score: 2, Insightful

      -- Yeesh, I'm sick of people bitching that Lucas ruined their childhood fantasies with his subsequent movies.

      Subsequent experience with treasured childhood movies or shows is always a bad idea. Nothing is as good as it was when we were young.

      I used to love Gilligan's Island when I was a child and I think that the shows are utter and irredemable cr*p now.

      Does that invalidate my childhood memories? No it doesn't. It just means that I grew up, became a more critical viewer and now demand more depth to my comedies and TV show.

      Face it folks, the original Star Wars movie were fluff and we all lvoed them when we were young but that just means that we had different tastes then.

      As much as I liked the original trilogy I really can't watch them now because the acting is terrible (Harrison Ford in TESB is horrible) and the plots are really thin.

      But I certainly cherish the memories that I had of watching them.

      Frankly I'd be more worried if I actually did like the movies as much now as I did when I was younger.

    2. Re:the tattered remains of your childhood... by Trogre · · Score: 2, Funny

      If you really want to see your childhood memories ruined, go rent the new Thunderbirds movie some time...

      --
      "Nine times out of ten, starting a fire is not the best way to solve the problem." - my wife
  22. No Star Wars review thread would be complete... by FunkyRat · · Score: 2, Informative
  23. Political commentary in ROTS by ghostunit · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Something I found really odd was when Anakin says "if you're not with me, you're my enemy" and Obi-Wan replies "only a Sith deals in absolutes".

    This is obviously an anti-Bush remark, but it doesn't fit at all in the movie. First of all, it's quite clear that by that point they are already mortal enemies, even Obi-Wan had already said they had no path left but to try to kill each other. Second, the "only a Sith deals in absolutes" is nonsense, especially considering lines such as these:

    OB1: The emperor is evil!
    DV: From my point of view the Jedis are evil!
    OB1: then you are lost!

    I liked the subtle (and unintended, since the plot was written in the 70s) critcism of ep2 and 3 to the current political madness in America, but that line was lousy.

  24. See it dubbed! by OblongPlatypus · · Score: 5, Interesting

    Spending the year studying in Barcelona, I ended up seeing Episode III dubbed to Spanish, and I truly and sincerely believe this made the experience better.

    Most noticeable was the improvement in the scenes with Anakin/Vader, because Jamie is exactly right - Christensen in an awful actor. And much of this awfulness lies in the horribly wooden and monotonous delivery of every single line of dialogue, which means having it replaced by an experienced Spanish voice actor is a real blessing.

    But the improvements weren't limited to Anakin's lines, and my theory is that this can be explained by the extreme use of blue/green-screen photography in these films. The actors are used to delivering their lines while at least in some sense being there in the environment of the film's story, and end up floundering when forced to work with the nothingness of a green screen. The voice-actors that do the dubbing, on the other hand, have years and years of experience in putting emotion in their lines without any sort of environment except the recording studio.

    Maybe those of you in the right parts of the US can take a trip across the border to Mexico and see it there? Do they even dub films there?

    --
    -- If no truths are spoken then no lies can hide --
  25. Re:But where did you watch it? by F34nor · · Score: 4, Funny

    That's because all those support copyright are plants by THE MAN, man. Don't you get it, they're listening to everything we do man, it's like a total conspiracy, they're even reading this post man! Oh god they're everywhere...

  26. Special Effects by two.oh · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Being a VFX artist myself, I felt the movie was extremely lacking in certain respects. The first battle scene was amazing, without any doubt. However, Lucas, for some reason, put way too many blue screen shots towards the middle and end, where he relied heavily on CG imagery to back landscape shots.

    For example, Palpatine's room had a backplate entirely out of CG, and at times, the room itself changed from a live action plate to a CG plate when him and Yoda were fighting.

    I felt a lot of it was just too synthetic. I hate to say this as a VFX artist. It would have been nice to see more sets and a more hands-on approach towards the overall look and feel --It was just too clean.

    As another example, when Obi-wan and Anakin are fighting Count Dooku in that room, it was a in a movie set where everything was constructed except the back drop of the space battle. This was a similar set up that they had on Return of the Jedi during the fight between Luke and Anakin.

    CG has to have a job of supporting the movie, not making an integration between CG scenes and live action scenes.

    Don't get me wrong, I've seen great CG/live integration pieces. However, they were great because they were subtle and supported the concepts and ideas.

    1. Re:Special Effects by ocbwilg · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Don't get me wrong, I've seen great CG/live integration pieces. However, they were great because they were subtle and supported the concepts and ideas.

      I agree. My biggest beef with the CGI is that IMHO, VFX needs to be used to enhance the story or draw attention to important details. In this movie there is so much CGI/VFX that in many scenes it is distracting from the main story. The giant space battle looked awesome, and it would be fun to watch if the space battle were the story. But the story was Obi-Wan and Anakin trying to get to Grevious's spaceship, and that kept getting overshadowed. There are countless other instances in the first three movies. Someone should teach Lucas that making a movie that "looks great" does not make a "good movie".

  27. (Spoilers herein) Wrong order by PrvtBurrito · · Score: 2, Interesting
    In hindsight, I think many are disappointed that the scene where Anakin turns doesn't make sense because he is upset one moment and then a murderer the next. Personally, I think Lucas constructed this movie in the wrong order.

    Why not have put the confrontation between Anakin and Obi wan earlier in the movie, perhaps having him not turn, but flee after killing Mace (Sam Jackson's character). Then Obi wan and him fight, producing a similar result as in the movie. Then perhaps having him storm the Jedi temple as the robotic darth vader from the other movies? It would have been a lot more believable if they had kept him away from being a mass murderer until he was burned and behind the famous mask. It also would have been bad ass seeing darth vader from the original trilogy storming in front of an army of storm troopers.

    --
    Laboratree - Scientific collaboration based on OpenSocial.
    1. Re:(Spoilers herein) Wrong order by vhold · · Score: 3, Informative

      I don't know, that woulda been cool but I think the emotional impact of anakin killing the 'younglings' (what an annoyingly redundant word) is greater.

      Seeing Darth Vader doing it would have just been 'eh, yea, figures'

    2. Re:(Spoilers herein) Wrong order by PrvtBurrito · · Score: 2, Interesting

      That was effective emotionally, the problem I had with it was that it was unbelievable how he got there. They should not have let anakin turn to a murderer in a single scene, it just didn't make sense.

      --
      Laboratree - Scientific collaboration based on OpenSocial.
    3. Re:(Spoilers herein) Wrong order by wondafucka · · Score: 2, Interesting
      In my imagination I always thought that the transition was gradual, that many of the key jedi figures were hunted over time, that Vader's body parts were replaced one by one.

      But then again, I'm not the one that's obscenely rich, here.

    4. Re:(Spoilers herein) Wrong order by danro · · Score: 2, Insightful
      They should not have let anakin turn to a murderer in a single scene, it just didn't make sense.
      Well, he did have some prior experience killing children (exterminating the tusken village in ep. 2).

      On a side note, Padmé took that baby-killing episode rather lightly.
      It basically went something like:

      Anakin: They are animals, and I slaughtered them like animals! ...and not just the men, but the women, and the children too!

      Padmé: There, there I'll just give you a hug and everything will be OK! It doesn't really bother me that much that my romantic interest is a self-confessed mass murderer.
      --

      "First lesson," Jon said. "Stick them with the pointy end."
  28. It was pretty good .. by Sandmann · · Score: 2, Funny

    ... I already can't wait for "Revenge of the Seveth".

  29. Sadist! by GreyyGuy · · Score: 3, Funny

    It was bad enough before that we had to wait 3 years to find out what happend to Han after he was frozen, but with this schedule, we would have to wait 12 years!

  30. Re:Prepare to be flamed by ericdano · · Score: 2, Funny

    No no, they were too busy posting duplicate stories to go see it.

    --
    It's either on the beat or off the beat, it's that easy.
    I moderate therefore I rule!
    --
  31. Lucas on the Mythical Man by Adult+film+producer · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Lucas however, can do myth very, very well. And once Lucas gets around to telling the Myth Of Anakin's Fall, the real story that Episode I and II have been leading to,

    Reminds me of the documentary Bill Moyers produced a few years ago about Joseph Campbell. The title of the doc was called "Joseph Campbell and The Power of Myth." Joey wrote a ton of material about mythology and how it shaped mens minds over the course of history. Fascinating guy, But the third or fourth video in this documentary, Bill Moyers travels the the George Lucas darth-vader ranch in California or where it was. Apparently Lucas was a student of Campbell, or least an avid fan of his writing. Lucas spent a good while talking about the inspiration Campbell provided him.

    Here's a link to mininova, some people seeding The Power of Myth in audiobook format... not sure if that includes the George Lucas interview though.

    http://www.mininova.org/search/?search=power+of+my th

  32. Re:How does Eps I-III Alter the Viewing of Eps IV- by PrvtBurrito · · Score: 3, Insightful

    (spoilers maybe below) Honestly, although I have mixed feelings about this trilogy, I think that this movie produces a tragic sadness that hovers over the original trilogy. Anakin wasn't just an asshole who turned to the darkside, his turn may not have totally been his fault both the sith and the jedi share the blame. I think that makes darth vader a sad tragic character instead of the evil demon he is made out to be in the OT.

    --
    Laboratree - Scientific collaboration based on OpenSocial.
  33. Luke is "The One" by alienmole · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Both Anakin/Vader and his mentor Obi-Wan die to save Luke, and Luke goes on to help save the galaxy and as you say, develop a less stuffy Jedi ethic. It seems as though any prophecy should have been more interested in predicting Luke than Anakin.

    Then again, the Oracle in The Matrix told Neo what he needed to hear. If the prophesy was truly about Anakin, that may have been what was needed to bring about the desired chain of events. But that would imply some interesting things about the creator or source of the prophecy -- was the prophecy "merely" a matter of foreseeing the future, or was it a case of manipulating destiny by an entity with godlike powers who could foresee all outcomes? Either way, what does it say about free will in the Star Wars universe?

    1. Re:Luke is "The One" by ACNiel · · Score: 5, Insightful

      No, Vader destroys Sideous and himself in one selfless act. Vader does fulfill the prophecy, and destroys the Sith, bringing balance back to the force. Luke was almost dead when this happened, and without Vader's interference, would have died.

      Anakin was the one.

      And how does removing half the force bring balance? With Lukes "less stuffy" ethic, he practices both light and dark side, and through one set of monks that embrace everything, there is balance.

    2. Re:Luke is "The One" by rpresser · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Without Luke, Vader would not have mustered the courage to fulfill the prophecy.

      Then again, without Luke (in utero), Annakin would not have been tempted to the dark side in the first place.

    3. Re:Luke is "The One" by Koiu+Lpoi · · Score: 4, Insightful

      I thought the balance was that once Annakin kills off everone, all that's left are:

      Dark Side: Palpatine/Vader
      Light Side: Yoda/Obi-Wan

      Thus being perfect balance.

    4. Re:Luke is "The One" by brainee28 · · Score: 2, Interesting

      I don't agree. Vader fufilled the prophecy by killing off the Jedi in Episode 3. The prophecy states that the Chosen one will bring balance to the Force. The Jedi assumed that the Sith was the unbalance to the Force, as did much of the audience. However, Jedi were the majority until Sidious and his apprentices appeared (Maul, Dooku and Vader). Anakin brought balance by killing off all Jedi. No more majority/minority.

  34. Padme's death by IsItWashable · · Score: 4, Funny

    You know that bit where Obi-Wan says "It's like...she's lost the will to live"? She wasn't the only one.

  35. Is it just me? by YrWrstNtmr · · Score: 2, Insightful
    Or does anyone else not give a flying fuck about all these overanalysed, selfserving reviews. Not just Star Wars, but any movie.

    I can count on zero hands the number of movies I have seen or not seen based on a review. Be it Ebert or some anonymous blogdude. If it looks interesting to me, I'll see it (theater or DVD). If not, oh well. At most, it will be the recommendation of a friend. "Hey, you should check this one out". And it may go on my Netflix list to eventually bubble to the top.

    All these mindnumbingly long reviews are so many wasted electrons to me. "Oh...(according to me, The Most High and Important), Lucas can't write, he's a hack, blah blah...or "OMG! they screwed up the CGI, and in scene 42, timecode 1:42:02:0324, the lightsaber doesn't exactly follow Yoda's arm movement! The entire movie sucks!"
    Get a life. It's a movie. Escapism.

    I saw the original Star Wars in the theater when it first came out, and all the others since. I'll go see this one as well. I saw about the first 5 minutes of the copy that's floating around. Enough to know that I don't want to see it for the first time on a little screen, in far less that optimal resolution, with a timecode stamped across the top.

    When you sit and overanalyse the thing, you ruin it for yourself. Enjoy the movie. Or not. If that's your bag to try to determine exactly what Lucas was thinking, and/or how bad he screwed it up, fine. But no one really gives a fark what you and your buddy think.

    1. Re:Is it just me? by Sarcasmooo! · · Score: 4, Insightful

      Well then, welcome to the demographic of 'general viewing public'. You're an entertainment advertiser's wet dream. Let's see....

      You don't seem to think art needs to be good, you don't think it's important whether or not it's a positive or negative contribution to American culture, and you apparently think we should stop thinking so hard with our brains and just watch what whatever a commercial can convince us (or our friends) looks cool.

      If you don't think that art should aspire to greatness, or that people should view it from a critical or inquisitive state of mind, and collectively push our culture towards more inspiring and meaningful works, then maybe you should just watch Survivor? Or maybe you'd like to play with this keychain? They shine in the light....*jingles keys*

      Or maybe you don't "give a flying fuck" because our entertainment culture is so dismal that calling it art is almost instinctively difficult to accept. I would agree if movies and television didn't hold so much potential, but they do, and so standards are important. It's difficult to take them seriously without imagining that it's somehow comparable to a tall slender man is standing in an art gallery, dressed in black with a goatee and non-prescription eyewear, pondering the significance of a pile of shit on a pedestal in front of him. Now maybe you missed Kangaroo Jack or the thousands of equally shitty productions out there that we call works of creativity, but either the implications of our particular pile of shit are of concern to you, or they are not. But you can't really argue that they shouldn't be.

  36. Re:Prepare to be flamed by Golias · · Score: 4, Insightful

    A lot of people were (and are) reluctant to see it because the previous one was such a God-forsaken disgrace.

    Effects rating

    Episode I looked fairly realistic most of the time. While Jar-jar was an unpopular character, he was rendered fairly well most of the time. The biggest weakness was that the CGI was perhaps a little to sparse and too uniform. The battle-droid "pez dispenser" scene in particular didn't look quite right.

    Episode II was a complete mess. Shot composition and cinematography were simply discarded and ignored in favor of making things look "high tech." The cartoon shots of Tokyo in "Ghost in the Shell" looked more realistic, and certainly less distracting from the main action. There were a lot of shots which simply could not have been done with stop-animation or puppets or other techniques, but it seems like they were done that way for no other reason.

    Episode III... From the opening battle scene in the very beginning, I think you will agree that this time Lucas finally got it right. He begins with a nice close-up of a couple fighters skimming the surface of a larger ship, so when the "camera" pans back you have a much better sense of scale. (He also included one of those robot controller satellites in the shot, which not only helped the eye grasp the scale of the shot, but also reminded the viewer who they were fighting against.) Later scenes in other landscapes were also fantastic. At no point while watching the movie for the first time was I suddenly reminded that I was watching CGI characters or backgrounds.

    Story review

    God, what a fuck-up.

    One of the things that made Star Wars so cool was that Lucas decided to make it feel like a 1930's 15-minute serial, in which most of the audience was not likely to have seen the beginning of the story. He wanted it to "come in at the middle", so he wrote an elaborate back-story which he never seriously thought he would get to film.

    Having that untold back-story made the entire world seem bigger and more well thought-out.

    When making Episodes 1-3, he did not have benefit of all that extra story, and it really shows.

    Also, all the precious little inbred tie-ins to the the original series (C3PO was built by Anakin, "Red Five" was Obi-Wan's call sign, Chewbaca fought along with Yoda, etc. etc. etc.) were really tiresome, and had the impact of making what should have been a large-scale saga about a galactic struggle of mighty armies turn into a story where the fate of all civilizations for two entire generations were married to the actions of the same small small handful of people, many of whom were directly related.

    Would it have hurt the story to have had Mace Windu (or some other Jedi) be the one who discovers the clone factory in Ep 2, instead of Obi-Wan being the only Jedi who ever does anything that matters? Did it really need to be Boba Fett's dad who was the genetic source of the clones? Did Chewie really need to be in the Wookie battle scene at all?

    Why did Lucas think that all of these little "wink wink" connections would make the films more entertaing? If anything, they guarantee that children down the road who watch these films in 1-6 order will not enjoy 4-6 half as much as we did.

    --

    Information wants to be anthropomorphized.

  37. Death Star Schedule Slippage by brodin · · Score: 2, Funny

    Of course it could, it is a government project!

  38. Proper viewing order: IV, V, III, VI by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Insightful

    The flashback after "Empire" is indeed good. But all you need is Episode III. Episode II has too much nonsense about flying R2 units and bounty hunters and 50's diners. Episode I proves that little kids can only be the hero in little kids' movies, in addition to just having too much Jar-Jar.

  39. Re:Contradiction by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

    I don't know why Lucas had to inject his own contemporary politics into this one, apart from sucking up to the people at Cannes. Doesn't he realize that will seriously harm the experience of 50% of the population who were just expecting a Star Wars movie?

    Yeah, it really spoiled it for me when Yoda turned round and said "For the Republicrats do not vote. Strong in the Dark Side they are."

    Oh, wait - he didn't. In fact, I don't actually remember a single reference to contemporary politics in the entire fucking movie.

    Of course, if you want to read your political affiliations into a kids' story, feel free. If you can see huge similarities between whichever party you support and the Sith, hey, you're welcome to. If the cap fits, right?

  40. Anyone ELSE see this in SPANISH? by Balthisar · · Score: 2, Insightful

    I'm in a land where Spanish is spoken, and I don't do too bad at it myself. So, of course I went to see it opening night! Despite being in Spanish (English version sold out for some reason!), I went to see it.

    It wasn't bad. I didn't see too much of the crappy dialogue and acting that everyone's griping about.

    So, anyone ELSE see this in Spanish here? Am I just not good enough at understanding Spanish yet to be totally let down by this movie? Further more, I'm HAPPY with episode III -- will I be totally let down if I see it in English???

    --
    --Jim (me)
  41. SW & Political Commentary by jbs0902 · · Score: 2

    What amazes me the most is how the media has fallen all over themselves to report how Lucas used ROTS as a vehicle to comment on the Bush administration. Now, I know it shocks you that someone in Hollywood would dislike the Republicans.
    The two lines that are quoted by the media are:
    Padme: "So, this is how liberty dies;" and later in the film
    Vader: "If you are not with me, you are my enemy."

    Fine, while I fail to see, especially given the context of its place in the film, how the first line as a commentary on Bush. I can see that it is very quotable. The second line is really unmissable as a parody of the infamous, "With us or against us" Bush line.

    But, I want to note that the movie's only voice of tolerance and relativism was Palpatine, advising Anakin that the only way to be truly great is to understand all aspects of the Force! That is multi-culturalism right there.

    So, here we have the Emperor giving the traditional Democratic view of things and Vader dropping the Bush parody lines. I thought both the Emperor and Vader were evil. I am very confused about exactly what political commentary Lucas is making. I can only assume that one of two conclusions is true, either, (a) Lucas is totally inept at political commentary, or (b) the Media critics are projecting their own emotions on to the film, i.e. the film is acting like a Rorschach test.
    Either way, I'd really appreciate it both Lucas, the media, and anyone else leave their Damn political opinions off my entertainment.

    Maybe the political arguments would have held more water is Lucas had taken the trouble to give the Sith and Jedi an constant philosophy through out the films and between characters. But, as nice as the feeling of the Jedi/Sith philosophies are they are just too inconsistent to withstand close scrutiny. Which is why is is better to just enjoy the movies than study them like they are the Torah.

    However, the funniest political commentary on the film comes from this guy who sees the Jedi council as the Catholic Church. Whatever...

    SyntheticLife, meanwhile, gives the guy who sat next to him a pretty harsh review: "I would've said something but then I got scared when he started talking to the characters in the movie."

  42. The X Factor by soloport · · Score: 3, Interesting

    I surmize that the real reason for the hideousness of the later episodes is simple: George can't write worth a damn.

    Factoid: Lucas's wife Marcia edited American Graffiti and Star Wars; the couple were married from 1969-83.

    Remember how the original Star Wars was so different? Mixed with humor and other elements in the dialogue -- seemed to consist of real entertainment.

    Too bad Marcia wasn't there to influence all the episodes...

  43. Wookies doing TARZAN impressions?!? NOOOOOOOOOO!!! by netadmin · · Score: 2, Insightful

    I couldn't believe it... they actually made a wookie do a Tarzan call on the way into battle!!! SOooo WRONG!

    It made me wanna shout NOOOOOOOO!! in the cinema hall just like Anakin does when he's told he killed Padme and Luke does in the "you're not my father scene". Okay so I got it off my chest.

    NOOOOOOooooooooo

  44. Ok, here's a better one... by pyrrhonist · · Score: 3, Funny
    For the uninitiated, the G. Lucas American film series about warfare amongst the stars is a peculiar look at parallel universes and strange creatures interacting with humans in an attempt to secure peace throughout the galaxy. Indeed, this war amongst the stars, or "Star Wars" as it is called, is indeed a film series about love and betrayal, incest and abandonment, good midgets and bad midgets, strange fish creatures with too much power, and robots.

    Indeed, this film series (whose art house qualities remind the intellectual filmgoer of the Decalogue in scope, or perhaps a parallel can be best made between Star Wars and the Trois Couleurs Trilogy, in that both series exhibit semi-paradoxical tendencies for the both the surreal and the comic while trying to maintain at least some semblance of the post-modernistic cliche of parallel bereavement and longing for the freudian (or perhaps jungian would be better) other in that the subconscious is always expressed in terms of pseudo-violence, usually directed towards the self but often manifested in the form of senseless destruction against establishment regulation.

    It is important to remember this war amongst the stars in these quasi-anthropological terms, for the genesis of such serial work too can have its roots in the experimental (think of the obvious parallels between Return of the Jedi and, say, Man With a Movie Camera). With that in mind, Revenge of the Sith...

    ...sucks.

    --
    Show me on the doll where his noodly appendage touched you.
  45. Re:How does Eps I-III Alter the Viewing of Eps IV- by jackspenn · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Your commment about the story focusing on Anakin/Vader is abdsolutely correct. I've read the books, seen the movies and it has always been my impression that Star Wars is mostly about father Skywalker's life and how he is saved by his son then it is about just Luke. Luke the son is important, but the story is about the father's fall and redemption.

    I see the important central idea around Star Wars in how Darth Sidious's attempt to turn Luke, ends up saving Anakin's sole.

    If you look at how in episode VI, Luke is in the place against Anakin that Anakin was in episode II with Count Dooku.

    That was where Darth Sidious realized he could control Anakin and make him his apprentice by having him kill Dooku.

    That step was Anakins last chance to resist. The difference is that Luke stops short and refuses to fight.

    It drives the Sidious to start killing Luke and it gets Vader to recognize and correct his mistake years later.

    Look at Luke and Anakin when Sidious tries to convert them, they are both roughfully the same age, in extremely similar positions.

    I think it adds to the whole experience.

    --
    Respect the Constitution
  46. Re:Prepare to be flamed by Golias · · Score: 2, Funny

    It's either on the beat or off the beat, it's that easy.

    Only a Sith deals in absolutes. ;)

    --

    Information wants to be anthropomorphized.

  47. Other problems... Spoiler-laced of course by Freewill · · Score: 3, Insightful

    There are issues with the storyline between where we start in Ep4 and where we were going with Ep1-3. Lucas just couldn't avoid boxing himself into a corner. A corner you can't get out of no matter how many greenbacks you throw at it if you can't (or don't hire someone who can) write a decent screenplay.

    SPOILERS

    1. 3PO and R2 have their memory wiped. Fine, but how does that explain that Vader doesn't exclaim upon first seeing the droids in the 2nd trilogy "3PO! R2! I remember you two!" It's not like they even changed their names so they could start 'fresh' in their lives as androids.

    2. Luke and Leia are born and the grand idea to protect them is... drumroll please! a) place one in a senator's family, close to the Emperor and one would expect, Vader as well, and b) place the other with the only remaining living relatives of the Skywalker clan. Vader, given the 20 years or so that will pass, he will *never* visit his home planet during all that time, eh? To visit his mother's grave, see how his half-brother is doing, etc.?

    3. Padme dies of a 'broken heart'? The first 2 movies let her demonstrate the qualities that her future daughter will possess: she's basically a strong-minded and smart young woman. Yet RotS demotes her to the cliche of weak-hearted wife that can't live without her husband's love. WTF?

    4. Yoda 'failed'? How did he fail? What occurred during his battle with the Emperor that made him have to run? Surely he could've attacked again? You would think with the fate of the galaxy hanging in the balance, he would have tried to get the Emperor while his defenses were down, busy trying to placate the Senate as he wrapped up his plan of domination.

    5. What exactly compelled Yoda and Obi to go into exile? As far as they know, they are matched up quite well. Emperor and Vader to Yoda and Obi. So go run and regroup... but wait until the kids are grown? The kids are safe, they would have you believe... And as Obi already knows, Vader, as a young Lord of the Sith, makes brash mistakes (e.g. getting all his limbs chopped off) when he lets his temper get the best of him. Even the Emperor gets his ass handed to him by Mace Windu, it's only Anakin's surprise intervention that shifted the scales then. So why wait while the Emperor has all those years to train Vader?

    The point is not to say these are problems that couldn't be solved, but indeed that they COULD HAVE been explained, but for some reason Lucas did not. Padme could indeed have been mortally wounded by Vader, Yoda as well, and a danger could have enveloped the remaining Jedi, thereby forcing them to leave and go into exile, and bury their 'force' fields in order to save innocent humans, etc.

    But even further, there are other elements in this final movie that just make me so frustrated. The gravitas of the whole storyline is FINALLY hinted at, never mind with the Williams' score, but in the actual acting! Yoda, even as a CG actor, showed much more deep thought (gone are the simple platitudes that he was spouting back in 1 and 2) than practically any other actor in this film. And during the climactic lava battle, we're finally shown a Jedi's declaration of love for another, as Obi Wan, finally realizing that Anakin must die/is already dead, tells him that he loved him. Where was that during 1 and 2? Where was ANY counter to Anakin's angst that we all whined about in 2? Surely Anakin's cheese is all the cheesier when it's in a vacuum. With Obi expressing his fondness for his 'brother' it doesn't seem so 'cold' this land of Jedi. Even if it's *against* the rules for a Jedi to show emotion or grow attached, that Lucas could never (or chose not to) let us see beneath Obi's frosty mentor exterior and see how much he cared for Anakin, it's a crime that robbed the movies of the depth they were sorely lacking.

    The surprising thing, I think for many of us long-time SW geeks, is that even with all the above, this movie still kicked 1&2's ass. I give it an 8 out of 10. With Empire a solid 10.

    --
    n/a
  48. Forgot some detail by soloport · · Score: 3, Insightful

    the couple were married from 1969-83

    Note the release dates: Star Wars (1977), The Empire Strikes Back (1980), and The Return of the Jedi (1983)

  49. "It's only a flesh wound!" by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

    Anakin: "Come back here, Obi-Wan, and fight like a man! I'll bite your kneecaps off!"

  50. Attention, mods! by imsabbel · · Score: 2, Interesting

    THe parent isnt funny, but really insightful.

    While the actors had to make their lines before the greenscreen, the voice actors for the dub could see the final mix, and so much better apreciate the situations the characters are in.

    --
    HI O WISE PRINCE. WHT TOOK U SO DAM LONG?
  51. Re:What is it about Jedi clothing, anyway? by jamie · · Score: 3, Funny
    Again, "Sith" borrows a page from The Simpsons:

    "Now, we are going to set this pile of evil ablaze, but because these are children's toys, the fire will spread quickly, so please stand back and try not to inhale the toxic fumes."

  52. Re:Prepare to be flamed by Hobbled+Grubs · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Frankly I think that Lucas made something that grew so big that it is impossible to contiune. He doesn't have the same actors, completely new technology and a reputation for having made a cult film. I don't see how people can expect something in the same vein or something better every time. Episode III was awesome. If you forget about all the special effects and just concentrate on the story, it is a moving film. Shit I cried in it a few times. Anakin's transformation into Vader is perfect, Palpatine is freeded to be his dark self and the story fits in perfectly to something episode 4. People expect way too much, the film kicks arse.

  53. Not convinced... by pandrijeczko · · Score: 5, Insightful
    The special effects question is easy: This is quite simply one of the most gorgeous films ever made.

    Some of the effects were decidedly ropey - the giant lizard ridden by Obi Wan was not that good (I'm not sure any CGI yet is good enough to create 100% convincing living beings yet) & the bit where several of the clones had their helmets removed so you could see their faces was atrociously bad - why Lucas didn't cut that scene I'll never know.

    As to the vehicle animations, I have nothing but admiration for ILMs ability to do what they have shown they can do but the ship battle at the beginning was just too busy. I really get the impression that as many new vehicles as possible were crammed in just to generate toy sales meaning we had a battle scene that was confused and kept drawing your attention all over different parts of the screen.

    Lucas however, can do myth very, very well.

    I won't argue that he can tell a good story but his pace and directing leaves much to be desired in the first trilogy.

    Child Anakin should have been the first half hour of episode 1 and Hayden's Anakin standing on a balcony arm-in-arm with Padme should have been the end of that same episode.

    Episode 2 should have shown the gradual fall of Anakin and ended at a point where Palpatine has already placed some doubts in his mind so that he has his first piece of internal struggle at the end of the movie - this would have mirrored Luke's struggles at the end of Empire Strikes Back very well.

    Episode 3 should have just been about the fall of Anakin and the rise of Palpatine. This was done far too quickly in episode 3 and lessened the effect as a result. We should have been aching to see Episode 3 just like we were with Episode 6 when Han was left encased in Corbomite.

    In summary, the movie is the best of the first trilogy but not a patch on any of the second trilogy movies. And before anyone mentions Ewoks, at least in Return Of The Jedi we were all rooting for the Rebellion and the little bears because we had saw real people.

    In the case of "droids vs clones", who really cares how many were killed on each side because more could always be wheeled on - the first trilogy turned warfare into something very sterile and remote whereas in the second trilogy we saw and felt genuine loss, whether it was an X-Wing pilot, Hoth infantryman or an Ewok.

    --
    Gentoo Linux - another day, another USE flag.
  54. The Biggest Inconsistancy by Prien715 · · Score: 4, Funny

    ...was not that Leia knew about her mother in Episode 6. If one actually reads the dialogue, he says the following:

    LUKE: Leia... do you remember your mother? Your real mother?
    LEIA: Just a little bit. She died when I was very young.
    LUKE: What do you remember?
    LEIA: Just...images, really. Feelings.
    LUKE: Tell me.
    LEIA: She was very beautiful. Kind, but...sad.

    So, let's see. Very young. Check. Can't remember words or anything specific. Check. However Obi-wan's dialogue is a bit more problematic:

    OBI-WAN: When your father left, he didn't know your mother was pregnant. Your mother and I knew he would find out eventually, but we wanted to keep you both as safe as possible, for as long as possible. So I took you to live with my brother Owen on Tatooine... and your mother took Leia to live as the daughter of Senator Organa, on Alderaan.

    Where to begin? How about Anakin knowing very early on and oh how about that bit about Leia taking Leia to Alderaan. Now THAT's a problem.

    However, to look at this and see that as the overriding point of the trilogy is to miss the point: the one critical mistake that could've averted Anakin's fall and the empire's rise. He didn't use a condom. If Padme/Anakin had used proper birth control, Luke/Leia wouldn't have been born but more importantly Anakin would have lost his biggest motivation to go to the dark side.

    So remember kids, for the sake of the galaxy, use proper contraception.

    --
    -- Political fascism requires a Fuhrer.
  55. Re:Zero psychological insight. by eagl · · Score: 3, Insightful

    Anakin didn't turn because of love, he turned because of fear. Watch episode 1 and 2 again. Anakin is almost continually motivated by fear. He wants to become a great jedi, but at his core is fear. At first it's fear of failure, but he also fears he will lose his mother. The first visions he consciously has are of his mother's death, and when he cannot save her, his fear gives in to anger and hatred, exactly as Yoda said it would. Sidious sees this inside Anakin and feeds that fear like a pet. A little suspicion here, a false hope there, and the fear grows. When it comes time to make his choice, Anakin choses entirely out of fear of losing another person he loves, not for the love itself.

    And of course in the end, that fear betrays even his love. It's so much more powerful and ironic that Sidious is able use that failure to more tightly bind Vader to him.

    And of course, in the "real world", we've all see what happens when you make powerful people and nations afraid. Scare a powerful group enough and everyone within reach gets crapped on, but of course some people just can't resist poking the tigers with a stick. When that happens, it may be better to stay out of the tigers way for a while. Lucas knows this...

  56. A note or two of my own... by catdevnull · · Score: 3, Interesting

    Ok. I saw it. I really liked it--it's Star Wars.

    There are two things to remember when watching any of these films:

    1) They are not Science Fiction
    2) They are not the uber-cerebral life-changing movies you thought they were when you were a kid (and they never were).

    Ok, those said, I think a pinch or two of salt should be added to your cinematic experience. Sure the dialog is wooden and contrived--if not corny. So is the acting & dialogue on anything found on the Sci-Fi channel, Bab5, Star Trek, Battle Star Galactica. Every one of those shows are cheesy but all the geeks seem to like them anyway. Why should SWEP3 be any different?

    Lucas calls them "Space Operas" --and if you're familiar with that genre, you know that opera's stories and motivations require an extended suspension of disbelief. You just go with it.

    Because all of the technology and theory in Star Wars isn't really explained, it just happens to take place in a galaxy far, far away, it gets lumped into SciFi genre. SciFi is a bit more satisfying to the "geek" types. But, Star Wars really doesn't quite fit into that category despite it's cover.

    Hayden Christianson definitely comes off as a poor actor--or he isn't given very good direction to bring more dimension to his character. How was he in "Shattered Glass"? I think dialog and direction can make or break a good performance. Maybe if Lucas let someone else direct, it might have worked better.

    I was blown away by the eye candy and I think it sets up the next film fine. I'm going to overlook some of the incontinuity others are finding just because I have more important things in life to bitch about. Afterall, it's just a movie, isn't it?

    If you're a detail-oriented person, you'll probably be very frustrated. If you just like an entertaining, mind-blowing ride through Lucas's world, you'll probably enjoy it.

    For whatever my $.02 is worth.

    --

    I might know what I'm talkin' about, but then again, this is Slashdot...
  57. Yoda... by tsmit · · Score: 3, Funny

    Anyone notice that, in the star wars movies, like episode 1 and 2, yoda is all bad ass and serious all the time. But in Empire and Jedi, the fucker is like, laughing all the time? Hanging out in a swamp in a hut? I think i figured out what happened. After everything happened with all the jedi dying and shit... yoda started sportin the ganj! It's the only explanation possible. Dude's got a bad case of the munchies when he first meets luke and he's giggling up a fit. I bet it's because he just smoked a bowl!

    --
    Yes, my girlfriend is a BitchX
  58. Re:Prepare to be flamed by vsprintf · · Score: 2, Funny

    I thought everyone on Slashdot saw it opening night at midnight.

    75% of Slashdotters are not allowed to go out after 9:00 pm.

    Of that 75%, half are trying to download it using bittorrent over a dial-up connection. The other half is still trying to shut down adware popups while getting to a warez site.

    Of the other 25%, half went to see the movie or plan to. The rest of us will wait a month for the DVD to be released.

    I made up all these numbers in case you're still wondering.

  59. Not bad but hardly great by pixelgeek · · Score: 4, Interesting

    While this movie wasn't as bad as the previous two prequels the plot and the acting really did little to present a compelling story of a man's descent into evil.

    Anakin's path to the Dark Side just isn't believable. He goes from being confused and petulent in the morning to killing little children in the evening? Based on what? Certainly not the limited dialogue and character development we see on screen.

    His reasoning for wanting to save Padme isn't explored enough. Hell Lucas could have just been a little more concrete and gien Padme a medical condition that *would* have killed her in childbirth. That would have been more believable than a dream that Aniken has.

    The main problem really is that Lucas doesn't have the writing nor the directorial skills to explore this type of emotional material. His actors are always wooden and deliver really badly written lines with flat performances. This movie is no exception and its no surprise that the path from Aniken to Darth vader just isn't believable.

    The movie looks nice but Lucas should stick to pulp sci-fi and avoid anything than hints of emotion or depth ...he can't pull it off.

    1. Re:Not bad but hardly great by Stickney · · Score: 2, Insightful

      The dream that Anakin has is, of course, a warning of his own destiny, but he misinterprets it, just as the Jedi misinterpreted the "balance to the force" prophecy, based on his own overconfidence.

      --
      ...the right of the people to keep and bear arms, shall not be infringed.
  60. Re:How does Eps I-III Alter the Viewing of Eps IV- by Tink2000 · · Score: 5, Funny

    You know, I was going to do the spelling correction bit, but this -
    ends up saving Anakin's sole
    is priceless.

    "Dad, I caught the fish you lost!"

  61. Not bad acting by FullCircle · · Score: 4, Insightful

    I see many posts saying how bad the actors were. Most of them are some of the best actors around. In other movies they are extremely talented.

    The problem is with the directing. Lucas seems to MAKE them do such a bad job.

    Elsewhere in the posts there is discusson about how good the Spanish version is compared to the English version. I'm sure that was because the voice actors didn't have Lucas directing them.

    Does anyone know why the acting is so bad in 1-3 and decent to good in 4-6? What made him go this route?

    --
    If tyranny and oppression come to this land, it will be in the guise of fighting a foreign enemy. - James Madison
  62. Re:Amputated Hand: Slice of Continuity by Inoshiro · · Score: 3, Insightful

    "Did George Lucas provide a scene (in "Revenge of the Sith") where Darth Vader's own right hand was sliced off? If the answer is "yes", then Lucas has remained true to the original trilogy."

    His hand was sliced off in episode 2 by Dooku, and this fact was used by Palpatine/Sidious to goad Anakin into killing Dooku for purposes of revenge when he had him as an unarmed prisoner!

    Perhaps if you actually watched the movies, you could be considered a score above 2 commentor; as is, you trolled some ignorant mods. Good day to you!

    --
    --
    Internet Explorer (n): Another bug -- that is, a feature that can't be turned off -- in Windows.
  63. Physical security by Aggrav8d · · Score: 3, Insightful

    Ever notice that the star wars universe hasn't evolved the sophisticated, space-age technology of the hand or balcony rail? While we're on the subject, they build the most deadly blade-like weapons imaginable and then forget to include little details like hilts. Then again in a universe populated by so many individual life forms I guess it makes sense to let safety take a back seat so that nature can cull the herd of the exceptionally stupid.

    1. Re:Physical security by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Disco was refering to the factthe hilts also stop the enemy from sliding their blade 'down' yours and cutting your hand. The hilt catches the enemies blade, unless it is a lightsaber, in which case the LS would cut thru the hilt.

      Personally, I'd like
      a) a LS that can sense when it hits another LS, and turn itself off for a tenth of a second. This would allow a LS to 'cut thru' another LS and hit the bad guy who was blocking.
      b) a LS with an adjustable length. Remember in Episode 2 when the Jedi are surrounded in the arena? Imagine one Jedi yelling 'Down!', and making his LS blade 100 feet long, then rotating in place, cutting down all the surrounding droids at once.
      c) Jedi who can actually detect the most powerful Sith lord in existense while standing right next to him.

      I guess I expect too much.

      (And what was with Ben Kenobi using "something as random and clumsy as a blaster"??)

    2. Re:Physical security by Atryn · · Score: 2, Insightful
      a) a LS that can sense when it hits another LS, and turn itself off for a tenth of a second. This would allow a LS to 'cut thru' another LS and hit the bad guy who was blocking.
      Of course, your opponents would do the same, so you'd both be dead... Not so useful now eh?

      b) a LS with an adjustable length. Remember in Episode 2 when the Jedi are surrounded in the arena? Imagine one Jedi yelling 'Down!', and making his LS blade 100 feet long, then rotating in place, cutting down all the surrounding droids at once.
      One does expect technologies to have limitations. I don't think every limitation needs to be explained...

      c) Jedi who can actually detect the most powerful Sith lord in existense while standing right next to him.
      He wouldn't be that powerful then, would he? As Yoda says: "Difficult to understand, the Dark Side is." or something to that effect. If it was as easy as "Oh yeah, that guy there is dark." it wouldn't have made much of a movie.

      --
      Come play Moral Decay!
  64. Re:Prepare to be flamed by emerald+demon · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Would it have hurt the story to have had Mace Windu (or some other Jedi) be the one who discovers the clone factory in Ep 2, instead of Obi-Wan being the only Jedi who ever does anything that matters? Did it really need to be Boba Fett's dad who was the genetic source of the clones? Did Chewie really need to be in the Wookie battle scene at all?

    You miss the point of the entire Prequel Trilogy. It is the backstory to the Original Trilogy, not just the story that came before the Original Trilogy.

    Why is Boba Fett from the original trilogy the best bounty hunter in the galaxy? His dad was once the greatest; he happened to be chosen to be a source for clones.

    Why is Obi-Wan depicted in the original trilogy to be one of the best Jedi; what accomplishments led him to this title? Back in the day, he did this, that, and some of those things.

    Why is Chewie a famous wookie? He fought hard back in the Battle of Kashyyyk, his name known all around.

    Why did Lucas think that all of these little "wink wink" connections would make the films more entertaing?

    They are the connections that tell us why we love the characters from the original trilogy so much: the Prequel Trilogy is their story.

  65. Re:Amputated Hand: Slice of Continuity by plenTpak · · Score: 3, Informative

    *** Warning: Spoilers ***

    -

    There is continuity in the way you describe; however, it is not when Anakin loses his hand (which, as noted, happens in Episode II, and does not result in his turning). It is when (*** Last chance spoiler warning ***) he cuts off Mace Windu's hand, resulting in Windu's death. When Luke loses his hand, and then takes Darth Vader's hand, he decides to reject the dark side; when Anakin loses his arm, and then takes Windu's hand, he succumbs to the dark side.

    It might also be interesting to note that Anakin's turn to the dark side, and his return from the dark side, both coincide with the lightning attacks against people close to him.

    (Aside: Wasn't Anakin's sudden and complete turn completely unbelievable?? It felt like the last few scenes of the movie were very rushed. Same with Padme's too-quick rejection, and Obi-Wan's quick change from reluctance to acceptance of his assigned task to kill Anakin.)

  66. no, there are plenty other self-centered asshats by Scudsucker · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Or does anyone else not give a flying fuck about all these overanalysed, selfserving reviews. Not just Star Wars, but any movie.

    Then don't fucking read it, you moron. Or try to waste other people's time complaining about it.

  67. Re:Prepare to be flamed by Golias · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Why is Boba Fett from the original trilogy the best bounty hunter in the galaxy? His dad was once the greatest; he happened to be chosen to be a source for clones.

    Except now we have the Special Edition version of Star Wars, in which Boba Fett is not "the best bounty hunter in the galaxy", but rather a full-time flunky in the personal entourage of a mob boss on a jerkwater desert planet in the middle of nowhere.

    Why is Obi-Wan depicted in the original trilogy to be one of the best Jedi

    He wasn't. He just happened to be one of the only ones left.

    Why is Chewie a famous wookie?

    He wasn't. Chewie was the co-pilot of a derelict smuggler who dumps his cargo at the first sign of trouble.

    --

    Information wants to be anthropomorphized.

  68. Re:Prepare to be flamed by Snaller · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Also, all the precious little inbred tie-ins to the the original series (C3PO was built by Anakin, "Red Five" was Obi-Wan's call sign, Chewbaca fought along with Yoda, etc. etc. etc.) were really tiresome, and had the impact of making what should have been a large-scale saga about a galactic struggle of mighty armies turn into a story where the fate of all civilizations for two entire generations were married to the actions of the same small small handful of people, many of whom were directly related.

    But that was always the way it was in StarWars. In Firefly its the ordinary unknowns that history forgets - but in StarWars it was royalty and those appointed by fate.

    --
    If Google really cared they would fix Android Chrome to reflow text, instead of discriminating
  69. Star Wars was Bill's inspiration. by solprovider · · Score: 4, Funny

    In a world where nearly everyone uses Windows, the idea of a machine - including a government-owned machine - being totally open to intruders is hardly novel. It is only too believable.

    Sorry to disagree, but I think it was the reverse.

    It was 1977, and a still impressionable Bill the Nerd saw the original Star Wars and had an epiphany: "So all computer technology must have vulnerabilities!"

    That one event explains ActiveX being designed after the vulnerable nature of the Internet was already explicitly obvious, and MSWindows being a security nightmare after various Unixes demonstrated how file access control should work.

    --
    I spend my life entertaining my brain.
  70. Re:Nitpicks (and spoilers...) by Thanatopsis · · Score: 2, Interesting

    1. A slight exaggeration. It was meant to be a long time ago. It's called poetic license.
    2.At the end of the battle between Obi and Ani, Obi Wan picks up Anakin's light saber and walks off with it. As far as passing to his son, that once again poetic license on the part of Obi Wan (See 1. Keep in mind, he also glossed over the fact that Darth Vader was Luke's father)
    3. Padme probably knew. She was also unconscious at the time.
    4. R2D2 memory wasn't wiped. Which is why he referred to Obi Wan as his master. R2 is clearly the more trustworthy of the two druids.

  71. A design issue by Felinoid · · Score: 2, Informative

    If I were in charge of designing and building a massive space ship for a routhless psycopath and the manager over me has a habbit of killing people who piss him off.
    I'd use off the shelf proven standards systems and I'd drop anything (and I mean ANYTHING) not entirely vital to making the ship work.
    Such as wepons to repell small fighters. I mean who in there right mind attacks a moon sized ship in tiny fighters?

    Oh yeah... I have an endless supply of storm troupers to defend everything. I've got phisical security down pat so what do I need electronic security for?

    After all if only a R2 unit can access the computers it's not a problem. R2 units don't have personalitys. After each flight they get wiped. You don't let them develup indupendence.
    Oh sure occasonally a an R2 unit saves roialty and is preserved or a nutty pilot gets attached to his. However that is the exception rather than the rule.

    However an R2 with a complex personality can pritty much punch a hole in security systems. It's the ability to outsmart the much simpler lock.
    Of course I wouldn't include one becouse that would slow down develupment of the death star.

    The empire learns. By eppisode 6 the empire is using security codes and shields.
    The rebels fully expect an old frighter code to still work becouse the Empire hasn't been very smart about security in the past.
    However instead of just blindly accepting the code the security officer calles the emperor.

    The original death star, No codes, no security officer and hotline to the emperor should something odd happen.

    The new super death star, shields, codes, security officer, emperor using the force to recognise what is going on.

    --
    I don't actually exist.
  72. The Crimes of Episode III by JWhitlock · · Score: 2, Funny
    I liked Episode III, and I like it more the more I look back on it. Yes, the dialog was awful, but the myth makes me keep playing back the plot in my mind. Ep. I and II left little effect on me, but I won't be able to see Darth Vader, Obi Wan, or Yoda in 4,5,6 the same way again.

    But still - the worst parts of Episode III for me:

    1. Younglings?
    2. All this awesome technology, but no birth control?
    3. Younglings!?!
    4. Are ultra-sounds are part of the dark side? Did she get any pre-natal care at all? Why were twins such a freaking surprise?
    5. Four Jedi walk into the Palpatine's chambers, light sabers drawn, and three die with almost no fight at all? Whose uncle got these guys on the Jedi Council?
    6. STOP SAYING YOUNGLINGS!!!
  73. Lucas doesn't know how to direct a fight... by icedphoenix · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Overall, RotS was enjoyable and while not a classic by any stretch, it was worth the price of admission (but not refreshments). Except for... Anakin v. Obi-Wan. After I watched it in theaters, I obtained the infamous time-coded copy of the fight, edited out all the Yoda-Palpatine parts, and watched it as a continuous 6.5 minute sequence. On that note, two things come to mind. 1) The fight works a LOT better that way. I mean, a LOT better. There's an overall flow and energy and it's much easier to actually see the story of that battle (Anakin's arrogance v. Obi-Wan's wisdom). After I first saw it, I had originally complained that the fight was basically 30 seconds of contact and 10 minutes of running around. With this constructed sequence, I can see that there's actually a good 4 minutes or so of action. 2) The one thing I HATE HATE HATE HATE about Lucas's directing style is his insistence on using close ups during hand-to-hand combat sequences. Whenever people are moving, shots should always be framed either wide or medium in order to capture the action. Saber locks are okay for closeups because there's no movement, but I really hate the way he flits from one face to other while they're clashing. A skilled director (re: anyone BUT Lucas) can capture emotion during hand-to-hand comabt sequences without resorting to over-over two shots, as if he were shooting a conversation. I have to admit that it wasn't as bad in movie as it was in AotC, where the original Anakin/Dooku fight was ruined because 90% of shot up close.

  74. Re:Younglings - another plot hole by Stickney · · Score: 2, Insightful

    1) Anakin's transformation is incredibly well visualized by the Jedi Temple/Younglings scene. It cements his change that he can overthrow his personal anguish towards children in the quest for power.

    2) Of course Anakin cannot take a Youngling apprentice! "Always two there are," if you remember.

    3) And yes, we are operating under the assumption that all people are basically good.

    --
    ...the right of the people to keep and bear arms, shall not be infringed.
  75. Remember Independence Day?! by zanderredux · · Score: 2, Funny
    I remember ID4, when the character player by Jeff Goldblum flew into the main ship to spread a computer virus into their network...

    The funny thing is that he's using a PowerBook or some other Apple notebook and he issues an ftp command from an Unix shell.

    I suppose that Jeff's character, being a hardcore scientist, coded the virus in plain C.

    Therefore, the problem isn't that alien technology is so easily owned but that they haven't been able to come up with something better than ftp and vulnerability to buffer overruns!!!!

    I just lost faith in extraterrestrial intelligent life by watching that movie....

  76. Re:Why are ... OWNED? Well.. (RL examples) by Maxo-Texas · · Score: 2, Insightful

    At a particular "secure" power plant, one security tester found....

    1) Even tho the steel door was indeed going to be hard to get past, the drywall next to it was easily punched through.

    2) Even tho the "man trap" did indeed close automatically, he could easily jump up, grab the edge and climb out.

    3) Even tho the site was high security, he simply asked the person ahead of him to hold open the door for him since his hands were full with a couple empty boxes.

    ---

    So, I won't fault the empire there little pecadillos.

    --
    She was like chocolate when she drank... semi-sweet at first and then increasingly bitter.
  77. Great Movie, Bad Star Wars by bill_mcgonigle · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Both of these reviews are terrible

    Can't disagree with you there. Here's a draft of a review/analysis I'm working on (comments welcome). It's aimed at the Star Wars fan who's seen the movie. If that's not you, stop reading.

    Revenge of The Sith delivers movie excitement, emotion, and experience not seen since The Empire Strikes Back. Ignoring obvious physics issues (e.g. the artificial gravity as the carrier lilted in low-earth orbit, the ambient heat over a lava flow) and some too-cute moments (excessive squawking of and irrelevant pans to the feathered dinosaur steed, or the "no I love you more" scene), overall, Revenge of The Sith is an excellent movie. The craft of movie making, the special effects (excepting the human/CGI cuts in the Count Duku rescue scene), the music, even most of the acting - all deserve an 8/10 rating or better. We also get an excellent new character, Senator Organa - the prequels' Han Solo. Revenge of The Sith has a captivating story and is emotionally involving - more than half of the ladies leaving the theater at the showing I attended were in tears, wrapped up in a bundle of thoroughly-stretched heartstrings. The guys hid it somewhat better.

    That said, Revenge of The Sith is bad Star Wars.

    First, there are jarring characterization inconsistencies. The ObiWan we've grown to know, even until the very end of the fight on Mustafa would have killed Anakin mercifully. You don't love somebody as your brother and then just let them die a slow agonizing death - especially if you're a Jedi. ObiWan wasn't after revenge or punishment - he genuinely cared about saving Anakin. He learned it wasn't possible, but that was his great disappointment, not a source of anger.

    Next, Anakin's surrender to the Dark Side is without explanation - yes, Windu was going too far, and deserved to have his hand taken, but then without segue Anakin pledges his allegiance to Palpatine. He later says he thought Windu was assassinating Palpatine, but Windu explained his actions and if Anakin suddenly decided at that point that the Jedi Order was corrupt, despite his years of training and his force-enhanced ability to sort out truth from lies, he didn't mention it. He has reason to doubt the Jedi Council but not enough to completely distrust Windu. Perhaps if Windu had attacked him, we might consider it plausible, but Windu is clearly on Anakin's side until the end. The *entire point* of Revenge of The Sith is to explain Anakin's conversion to the Dark Side - and apparently it's on the cutting room floor.

    Next, we have a torrent of events in conflict with the original trilogy:

    ObiWan is not supposed to know about Leia. This is demonstrated in ESB when Luke is leaving Dagobah: ObiWan: "That Boy is our last hope" - Yoda: "No, there is another." Even after 16 years of communication with Yoda, until that point ObiWan didn't know about Leia - Yoda was keeping one last ace up his sleeve. Yoda's character was handled fairly well in the prequels and we could believe this kind of maneuvering from Yoda. ObiWan's lack of knowledge about Leia could have been handled pretty easily - have the ship under attack as Padme is laboring and have Obi Wan grab Luke and bolt, leaving Padme (and unbeknownst to him Leia) in Yoda's care. Speaking of which, are we to believe Padme hasn't seen a medical droid during her entire pregnancy such that she wouldn't have known she was carrying twins? Or did her instincts tell her to keep that from Anakin?

    Speaking of Jedi inconsistencies, Yoda indicates that Qui Gon has achieved an ability unique, or at least highly unusual for a Jedi - he learned to commune with the living through The Force. Clearly he's going to teach this ability to Yoda and ObiWan over the next 16 years; so how in blazes does Anakin manage to show up for the group photo at the end of RoTJ?

    At times Yoda is handled brilliantly - when he knocks the Imperial guards unconscious or defends himself from the Clones at the Wookie outpost. Then he ge

    --
    My God, it's Full of Source!
    OUTSIDE_IP=$(dig +short my.ip @outsideip.net)
    1. Re:Great Movie, Bad Star Wars by ggvaidya · · Score: 3, Insightful

      SPOILER WARNINGS ALL OVER

      Nice review! Just a coupla points:

      1. Speaking of Jedi inconsistencies, Yoda indicates that Qui Gon has achieved an ability unique, or at least highly unusual for a Jedi - he learned to commune with the living through The Force. Clearly he's going to teach this ability to Yoda and ObiWan over the next 16 years; so how in blazes does Anakin manage to show up for the group photo at the end of RoTJ?
      I was wondering about this too when I came out of the theatre. The answer (I think) is that Qui-Gonn had to do-the-ghost-thing to teach Yoda the trick in the first place. So, once you're dead, if you're smart, you can figure it out - and in the ways of the force, Anakin is really, really smart.

      Of course, that doesn't explain why a ghost army of Jedi doesn't turn up at Yendor just to fuck with the Stormtrooper's minds, but eh.

      2. "Hiding in plain sight" doesn't pass the laugh test.
      Agreed. I guess they were hoping that Vader would not realise he had children. Still, they'd better be hoping he never visits the in-laws ...

      3. Did Windu just grab some trainees from the cafeteria to arrest the Dark Lord of the Sith?
      This must go into the review unchanged. I mean, wtf? Four Jedi go to confront a possible Dark Lord of the Sith, THREE get chopped up in about ten seconds, and the last one SINGLE-HANDEDLY kicks Imperial butt? Makes no sense.

      4. This is demonstrated in ESB when Luke is leaving Dagobah: ObiWan: "That Boy is our last hope" - Yoda: "No, there is another."
      Yeah, the Special Special edition is going to change to that to: "Good thing we've got a spare, huh, Master?"

      5. The ObiWan we've grown to know, even until the very end of the fight on Mustafa would have killed Anakin mercifully.
      The Obi Wan of the later years, definately. The Obi Wan of the ROTS, maybe, if all Anakin had done was turn to the dark side. I think the death of the younglings (what a funny thing to call Jedi children!), the extermination of the Jedi, the destruction of the Republic, the almost-murder of Padme, and the to-death battle with his own, beloved Padawan took it out of Kenobi. And yet, Padme is the one who dies of the mysterious yet fatal "broken heart" ... hmm ...

      6. Anakin suddenly decided at that point that the Jedi Order was corrupt, despite his years of training and his force-enhanced ability to sort out truth from lies, he didn't mention it
      Agreed it was rushed, but the way I saw it, right from the moment Anakin rushes to see for himself, he knows what he's going to do, and which way he's going to turn. It felt like he was going against hope: maybe Palpatine wasn't a Dark Lord, after all; maybe Windu would have killed him already. But if it came down to Anakin to make that decision, he knew he would choose the Emperor and Padme. His speech to Padme later on about "they were trying to kill the Councillor, I had no choice ..." was, I think, Anakin trying to excuse himself.

      Two other things struck me as odd about the movie:
      1. Anakin's face (somewhat silly, i know)
      So he gets horribly mutilated, burnt, etc. and ends up looking like a boiled egg. But he looks like a boiled egg at the end of ROTJ! Did the Emperor's final lightning attack have no effect on him? Look what it did to Mace Windu, after all.
      Possible explanation: Dark Lord of the Sith, Palpatine, against his apprentice, The Chosen One, most-powerful-Jedi-in-years Anakin Skywalker. No contest.

      2. Jedi Destruction
      Like you said, the Jedi were a real let down in the movie. I found all the surprise the Jedi showed to be a bit odd - aren't they supposed to be able to feel when people are attacking them? I would have liked to see more badass fighting, as the Jedi - even as Order 66 is going out - turn around and attack their would-be attackers, even before the order is properly transmitted - but slowly get bogged down by enemy fire. Or e

  78. If only Mace were actually Jules by mooboy · · Score: 3, Funny
    Ok, when Mace Windu has Palpatine on the ground:

    .. Anakin runs in, shouting "We're not supposed to kill him!"
    Mace turns and said "I don't remember askin' you a G@#DAMN thing" - - [Whacks Palpatine]

    Or

    .. Anakin runs in, shouting "We're not supposed to kill him!"
    [Mace whacks Palpatine] , [Big dark force energy explosion]
    "Oh, I'm sorry. Did that break your concentration? I didn't mean to do that. Please, continue. I believe you were saying something about 'not supposed to kill.'"

    --
    There's no place like 127.0.0.1
  79. VII, VIII and IX by janestarz · · Score: 2, Interesting
    I'm still hoping Lucas will live long enough to actually finish the next trilogy. After all, anyone who has read the books will want to see Timothy Zahn's books filmed.

    I'm personally hoping for the Rogue and Wraith Squadron books to be filmed (fanfilms anyone?!) because they're just so damned good. I love Wraith Squadron most because they're not so much bound to the rules of the Rebels. And Wegdean'tilles just rocks.

    Concerning Revenge of the Sith, I loved the movie, even though we were basically lying in front of the screen at the second row, but we did see it on opening night, in costume.
    You know you're really too much of a fan when your costumes are applauded...

  80. Luke IS the restored balance in the Force by Pfhorrest · · Score: 3, Interesting

    You've got it down precisely.

    Anakin/Vader was the "Chosen One". He returned balance to the Force. First, by eliminating all the Jedi but Obi-wan and Yoda, and all the Sith but Sidious and himself; and then, by killing both Obi-wan and Sidious, while Yoda died of old age and Vader died of his wounds. Thus, both the Jedi and the Sith were destroyed and the conflict between Light and Dark sides settled.

    Where Luke is important is not that he is the "Chosen One" who would restore balance to the Force - he IS the restored balance in the Force! Trained by Obi-wan and Yoda, tempted by Sidious and Vader, and then freed of all of them, left with the strength and passion of the Dark Side that almost drove him to become a Sith at the end of RotJ, but with the control and resolve of a Jedi, and the ability to temper those emotions when necessary.

    It actually reminds me a lot of the Vulcans and Klingons of Star Trek. The Vulcans are ostensibly the "good guys" on the side of reason and order; the Klingons are ostensibly the "bad guys" on the side of emotion and chaos. But throughout the series it's pretty obvious that the Vulcan's suppression of emotion is not such a great thing, and anyone can easily see how the Klingons' lack of reason is less than ideal. In that series humans are supposed to represent the "happy medium", people who embrace both emotions and reason and can control the both as needed.

    And I agree with you wholeheartedly: the themes of this movie, first of Anakin and his unsuccessful struggle to find a path between the extremes of the Jedi and the Sith, and then of Luke and his successul mediation of those extremes, are extremely powerful and touching themes that are common to any person's existence. We are all surrounded by polar choices, few as extreme as these fictional examples, but nevertheless every person must at times mediate disagreements between their reason and their emotions, their personal faith and their agreement with society, the freedom of their actions and the consent of others...

    As the old addage says, "all things in moderation", and as we all must struggle to find a suitable moderation between extremes, a well-implemented and convincing portrayal of these themes on an epics scale can be touching to anyone. Unfortunately, it seems that Lucas has failed to implement his story in such a convincing way. I am happy to hold in my mind an abridged version of the tale, and allow my own imagination to fill in the details in more acceptable ways. Perhaps someday this story will be told again, and better; either the Star Wars saga itself or another saga which tells the same essential tale. I certainly hope so.

    --
    -Forrest Cameranesi, Geek of all Trades
    "I am Sam. Sam I am. I do not like trolls, flames, or spam."
  81. Re:How does Eps I-III Alter the Viewing of Eps IV- by ultranova · · Score: 3, Insightful

    If anyone actually wanted to see Ep 1 and 2 again after the first time then somebody really needs to beat them to death with a tack hammer.

    I have watched Ep 1 and 2 several times from DVD after seeing them in a theater and enjoyed them very much.

    Episode 1 is simple, with good and evil very clearly defined, which is only appropriate - after all, the main character is a ten-year old kid. Episode 2 has a darker shade, with Anakin growing up and confronting the nasty facts of life - your loved ones die, no matter how mighty a hero you may be. And Episode 3 is dark, with Palpatine and Jedis putting Anakin into an impossible situation, and him losing control entirely.

    The whole prequel trilogy works very nicely, with the viewpoint and representation fitting the general mood of each movie perfectly. It isn't the original trilogy, because it doesn't tell the same story. But it tells its own story very well.

    As for the hammer... You really need to grow up a little and learn to tolerate differing opinions. Otherwise, you'll end up getting strangled to death with your own entrails, you sick hatefull heretical pervert.

    --

    Forget magic. Any technology distinguishable from divine power is insufficiently advanced.

  82. Re:Amputated Hand: Slice of Continuity by identity0 · · Score: 2, Funny

    Does anyone else think Lucas has a whole Freudian issue with hands and whatnot? I had to stop the urge to cross my legs every time I saw someone getting his hand hacked off in this movie.

    Jeezes, George, just go see a counselor or something, don't take out your psychological issues on the audience at the big screen where everyone can watch...

    Seriously, does anyone know if there's any symbolism to losing a hand?

    **Warning, Spoilers**
    A count of who loses hands to who in the Star Wars movies:

    New Hope: No one.

    Empire: Luke, to Vader

    Return of the Jedi: Vader, to luke

    Phantom Menace: No one.

    Clones: Anakin, to Dooku

    Sith: Dooku, to Anakin. Windu, to Anakin. Grievious, to Obi-wan. Anakin, to Obi-wan.

    In conclusion, if we ever see a third trilogy, in 7 no one will lose a hand, in 8 Leia will lose a hand, and in 9 half the friggin galaxy will lose a hand.

  83. How to 'remake' 1 -6 into something fantastic. by beep_beep_yor_dead · · Score: 2, Interesting

    I have only two words for you... keep the CG. Keep the overall story. Keep the characters (ok kill Jar jar). The two words are: Quentin Tarantino Any thoughts?

  84. Balcony rails by Julian+Morrison · · Score: 2, Funny

    No, they invented that tech, and after long hard lessons discarded it. As Dr. Non Canonical explains: "[balcony rails] are the first step in a civilizational decline that begins with a laudable concern for safety and ends up with 24 hour nannying of adults, and allergy safety labels reading 'contains nuts' on packets of nuts. The result of cosseting the shallow end of the gene pool is that it breeds and expands, quickly overwhelming literacy, sanity, and self responsibility. Entire planets which travelled this route have been lost, upon the demise from loneliness of the last person who knew how to be a nanny rather than require one. While compassion would suggest we protect those stupid enough to step off their own balcony (or off footbridges, etc), hard practical experience says let them fall." (emphasis in original)

  85. Re:How does Eps I-III Alter the Viewing of Eps IV- by grumbledoak · · Score: 2, Funny

    I have mod points today. I'd swap them for a tack hammer.