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Building the World's Most Powerful Laser

Posted by samzenpus on from the lazlo-would-not-approve dept.

Bill writes "Lawrence Livermore National Laboratories is attempting to create the world's largest laser. The NIF's goal is to focus the laser on a pea-sized hydrogen pellet and result in fusion ignition."

42 of 354 comments (clear)

  1. Companion Cloning/Bio-Engineering Project? by ScentCone · · Score: 3, Funny

    To produce Extremely Large Shark?

    --
    Don't disappoint your bird dog. Go to the range.
    1. Re:Companion Cloning/Bio-Engineering Project? by dsginter · · Score: 5, Funny

      Alternatively,

      We need to find an evil college professor and fill his house with popcorn!

      Hilarity will ensue!

      --
      More
    2. Re:Companion Cloning/Bio-Engineering Project? by AKAImBatman · · Score: 3, Funny

      You know, every time I make a reference to Real Genius around here, it goes right over everyone's heads. Which can mean only one of two things:

      1. Slashdot is infested with teenage wannabes who aren't old enough to have seen Real Genius.

      2. Slashdot is infested with people who *wish* they were cool enough to be geeks.

      Considering how much nonsense we see, plus the general Slashdot GroupThink(TM), I'm going for number 3: All of the above.

      --
      Javascript + Nintendo DSi = DSiCade
    3. Re:Companion Cloning/Bio-Engineering Project? by pocketfullofshells · · Score: 3, Funny

      I'm still trying to restore my hallway from all the water damage.

      forgot the plastic....

    4. Re:Companion Cloning/Bio-Engineering Project? by Nos. · · Score: 2, Funny

      The ice went directly from solid to gas.. no water damage. Of course the idea that the gas might be explosive is another matter.

    5. Re:Companion Cloning/Bio-Engineering Project? by spacecowboy420 · · Score: 2, Funny


      -or-

      3. Real Genius was gay and noone cares.

      --
      ymmv
    6. Re:Companion Cloning/Bio-Engineering Project? by Zugok · · Score: 2, Funny

      well I am trying to figure out how my car appeared in my dorm room.

      --
      "I just can't sit while people are saying nonsense in a meeting without saying it's nonsense" J Watson, Sci Am 288:(4)51
  2. I beg to differ by Yeldarb-7 · · Score: 5, Funny

    There is something for me to see here.

    1. Re:I beg to differ by Martin+Blank · · Score: 5, Funny

      Only with your remaining eye, though.

      --
      You can never go home again... but I guess you can shop there.
    2. Re:I beg to differ by Lord+Kano · · Score: 3, Funny

      I don't want to "see" a laser than can generate enough heat to start a fusion reaction.

      LK

      --
      "Hi. This is my friend, Jack Shit, and you don't know him." - Lord Kano
    3. Re:I beg to differ by xv4n · · Score: 2, Funny
      I don't want to "see" a laser than can generate enough heat to start a fusion reaction.

      Well, just in case, it comes with a label that reads "WARNING: Don't look at laser with remaining eye".

  3. I call it... by djward · · Score: 5, Funny

    The "Alan Parsons Project"

    1. Re:I call it... by Joey+Patterson · · Score: 1, Funny

      The "Alan Parsons Project"

      Damn... you can read my mind!

    2. Re:I call it... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      I thought that was some sort of hovercraft.

    3. Re:I call it... by Man+in+Spandex · · Score: 3, Funny

      The next logical step would be to put put them lasers on the moon and divide the moon into two units: Moon unit Alpha and Moon Unit Zappa

  4. Eh... by chriswaclawik · · Score: 5, Funny

    It may be powerful, but is it readily mountable on a shark's head?

    --
    A guy walks into a bar... well, I forgot the joke, but the punchline is that he's an alcoholic.
  5. About time! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    They finally put in my order! I was about to go someplace else for my "Death Star".

  6. If we have to go to these lengths by Blue+the+Wild+Dog · · Score: 5, Funny

    then the pea-sized hydrogen pellets have already won.

    1. Re:If we have to go to these lengths by MochaMan · · Score: 5, Funny

      Hey hey hey, let's not be so adversarial... give peas a chance.

    2. Re:If we have to go to these lengths by appleLaserWriter · · Score: 2, Funny

      Hey hey hey, let's not be so adversarial... give peas a chance.

      Don't stop there. Just add a blender and you've got whirled peas.

  7. Trouble is... by ross.w · · Score: 5, Funny

    Just when you get it finished, some rabbit comes and steals the Q36 Explosive Space Modulator, and there is no kaboom.

    --
    If my call is important, why am I talking to a recording?
  8. Who's Financing This? by Michael_Burton · · Score: 3, Funny

    Funding, and vital tritium pellets, will be provided by a grant from OsCorp?

    --
    When all you have is an axe, everything looks like a grindstone.
  9. And in other news... by The_Minkis · · Score: 5, Funny

    NASA has begun work on a replacement for the International Space Station. It is roughly spherical in shape, and resembles the AT&T logo...

    --
    #define QUESTION ((bb) || !(bb))
    1. Re:And in other news... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      Rumor has it that this is all an attempt to circumvent new advertising laws, though both AT&T and NASA denies making such a deal.
      "I find your lack of faith disturbing," comments NASA spokesman when questioned.

    2. Re:And in other news... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      It's too bad AT&T lost Vader to Verizon though.

  10. But can they turn it off? by quackPOT · · Score: 4, Funny

    "This is predicted to achieve self-sustaining nuclear fusion reactions, or ignition."

    Self-sustaining? Can they turn it off if it starts to get out of control? Amazing stuff, but to some degree a little scary.

    1. Re:But can they turn it off? by Kobun · · Score: 2, Funny

      I would expect that ceasing to feed it fuel would go a long way to stopping it. Barring that, once all the free form hydrogen in the atmosphere was consumed I would expect that things would stop then (a little sarcasm).

    2. Re:But can they turn it off? by Locke2005 · · Score: 5, Funny

      Well, it stops when it runs out of hydrogen... I mean, it's not exactly as if there are huge amounts of hydrogen floating freely all over the earth!

      --
      I've abandoned my search for truth; now I'm just looking for some useful delusions.
  11. all the laser is good for by circletimessquare · · Score: 5, Funny

    is making so much popcorn the victorian house falls apart

    --
    intellectual property law is philosophically incoherent. it is your moral duty to ignore it or sabotage it
    1. Re:all the laser is good for by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

      is making so much popcorn the victorian house falls apart

      I'll file your comment under "H" for "toy".

  12. Warning on Laser by nxtr · · Score: 5, Funny

    Do not stare directly at beam. Spontaneous fusion reactions of eyes may result. May also cause temporary blindness.

    1. Re:Warning on Laser by jacen_sunstrider · · Score: 2, Funny

      I'd like eyes that could temporarily be a part of a fusion reacton, and then be back to normal. It'd beat having eyes that can't see without large amounts of bending of light.

    2. Re:Warning on Laser by Trogre · · Score: 2, Funny

      Do not stare into laser with remaining eye.

      --
      "Nine times out of ten, starting a fire is not the best way to solve the problem." - my wife
  13. I wonder.... by d474 · · Score: 3, Funny

    Didn't we just hear news that the US wants to move forward with space based weapons?

    Oh.My.God. Once the filibuster is abolished, Darth Bush will finally be able to finish his Death Star!!!

    --
    Authority questions you. Return the favor.
  14. Re:Can't we use this in other ways? by xv4n · · Score: 2, Funny
    Laser typically aren't feasible for use in combat, how would you power such a thing?

    Building a mobile unit that could sustain enough power output to burn a hole in 16 inches of Tank armor...

    Easy , just put it on low orbit. Then use maps.google.com for aiming. Muahahahahah!

  15. A lesson.... by OverflowingBitBucket · · Score: 5, Funny

    And let that be a lesson to any other pea-sized hydrogen capsules that plan to screw with us.

  16. Most powerful laser by sith+lord+518 · · Score: 4, Funny

    what if the sharks eat the pea?

  17. Why? by JackAxe · · Score: 2, Funny

    Why can't they just heat their peas in the microwave like the rest of us.. :(

  18. Re:military research, again by caswelmo · · Score: 4, Funny
    "Why would you go through all the trouble of testing the dueterium/lithium samples in a reactor when they could just as easily do a purity test?"

    Probably because the people who work on nuclear physics & nuclear weapons technology are really, really stupid. They're probably not nearly as smart as you.

    Note: Please see previous article on sarcasm detection for help with this post.

  19. Re:nitpick: Not *A* laser by Sentry21 · · Score: 2, Funny

    I don't know how you could call "a network of 192 laser beams", 'the world's largest laser'....

    Maybe they got tired of all the posts about 'Imagine a beowulf cluster of these' and went out and built one.

  20. Great... by kmartshopper · · Score: 2, Funny

    ... can't wait until someone shines this thing at an airplane. Damn terrorists!

  21. Big laser? by lazlo · · Score: 2, Funny
    "lazlo-would-not-approve"


    Yes I would!

    --
    Pound! Bang! Bin! Bash! is this a shell script or a Batman comic?