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Britain's First Jedi Member of Parliament
earthlingpink writes "In his maiden speech to the House of Commons, the Hon. Member for Copeland, Jamie Reed MP, announced that he is a Jedi: "as the first Jedi Member of this place, I look forward to the protection under the law that will be provided to me by the Bill" (the quotation is a fair way down the page; search for 'Jedi,' not surprisingly). How long before we have a Congressional equivalent?" Update: 06/29 23:15 GMT by T : Reader JE_Hoover adds a correction: "Although the previous MP for Copeland was the Hon. Member for Copeland, the current MP for Copeland is not a member of the privy council. Debretts make it all clear."
This whole Jedi religion dreck has now officially gone too far. To those misguided simpletons out there who insist on calling themselves 'Jedi knights', I offer you this chance to prove yourselves:
What's that...you can't? Don't have suitable raw materials, you say?
OK...that's fair...how about this, then:
Are you doing it? I'm not feeling anything...
____
~ |rip/\/\aster /\/\onkey
Am I the only person who doesn't see the Jedi belief system flawed? I could only imagine the devestation to the republic if this became popular.
Peace out, homies.
This is not the article you are looking for.
Not every argument requires reduction to absurdity.
This is not the congressman you're looking for.
How long before we have a Congressional equivalent?
Oh, but we have. Problem is... they're all Siths. And the greedy kind.
"How long before we have a Congressional equivalent?"
They get Jedi, we get Sith...
"We are all geniuses when we dream"
- E.M. Cioran
As if there wasn't enough lunacy in Parliament.
Finding God in a Dog
Or maybe Count Obama?
Somehow "Master Kennedy" just doesn't have the same ring to it. And "Darth Delay" is only slightly better than "General Grievous"
Don't disappoint your bird dog. Go to the range.
This is an absolute insult to those of us who hold religious beliefs. Now the faiths of Christianity, Judaism and Muslimism are on par with something made up in a movie!
Clearly, the Congresscritters in the US will never go Jedi, as they're already devotees of the Book of Bokonon. This can be seen by their tendency to speak in foma, or as the rest of us call them, "reassuring lies." ;-)
"My strength is as the strength of ten men, for I am wired to the eyeballs on espresso."
This gives immense insight into the type of people that get voted into Parliment. The voters are either oblivious, don't care, don't know better or maybe they are also members of that movement.
Or perhaps they have a really twisted sense of humor...
-ShelbyCobra
Living life in the right side of the s-plane
Cast off your old name! Your Jedi name isIBEVI CRMAI of the planet imodium!
Sounds a bit constipated.
I'm friends with the youngest daughter of the former head of the PowerPC division of IBM you insensitive clod!
STARWARS - Fact NOT Fiction (Episodes 4 to 6 inclusively)
George Lucas quite naturally believes that he wrote "Starwars", when, in reality, he was told telepathically what to write in the original first three Episodes (4-6), by the very "Force" to which the films refer, and was "forced" to make only episodes 4-6, first, as a very important step in the preparation of mankind for the long-awaited TRUTH, about the real reasons for human life on Earth ("what on earth am I doing here?"), the meaning of life and its purpose, contained in "The Way home or face The Fire", from which episodes 1-3 should have been made, as I did my best, frequently, to tell him....continued...
I've seen miracles performed in the name of Jesus that are far more impressive than water into wine.
For example the healing of severe burns, where the skin had turned black and begun to flake off, the affected hand was made as good as new as we watched.
I know it wasn't a trick because it was my hand that was burnt in an industrial accident and it was healed because the woman who is now my wife (who was there) prayed for healing in the name of Jesus. Had she not had the courage to pray and ignore the heckling of by standards I would haver had permanent and disfiguring damage.
...you're doing waving your hand around like that?
I'm a Congressman. Mind tricks don't work on me. Only money.
With all these people going Jedi on us, I'm wondering how many people check their roots and realize that it is not the Jedi that they are, but Numenorians??! Why do people give up on teh Valar so easily?
I think most of our Congress in Gungan actually.
Don't blame me, I voted for Cthulhu.
Lucky for him, there are no active volcanos in the British Isles.
Sorry about the writing. Robot fingers, you know? Cliff Steele in DOOM PATROL #23
And this from other belief systems differs... how?
//Information does not want to be free; it wants to breed.
Sounds like he needed therapy.
"Hmm. I am to metaphor cheese as metaphor cheese is to transitive verb crackers!"
L Ron Hubbard didn't wait thousands of
What kind of parent names her child 'L'. No wonder he came up with all those whacky ideas later in life.
Actually, I always thought his name was "Elron"
Mod down people who tell people how to mod in their sigs
*whoosh*
What about white muslims? I can still make fun of Cat Stevens, right?
Badass Resumes
I would love to see a Star Wars fan movie as a parody of the Holy Grail. Making that is about as close as you can get to being the ultimate geek. Well, I guess you could throw the number 42 in at every possible opportunity but I digress..
I don't do this for karma, I do it for cash. It's much better.
I think his name was "LaFayette", which explains why he went by "Ron".
Ah. I see. For a second, I thought his mom gave him a weird name.
Mod down people who tell people how to mod in their sigs
Actually, I always thought his name was "Elron"
...I always thought his name was "Elrond"
You're missing a 'd'. It should be:
"Turn around... Turn-- Turn around..."
"Behold! I have created food!"
You can never go home again... but I guess you can shop there.
Good thing too, it'd be pretty damn gross if you were chowing down on your wafer and it suddenly turned into a warm rubbery little disc of human flesh.
We live, as we dream -- alone....
5. Do not allow attachments into your life.
That can be fairly easily done with a Postfix header check (see other story) or MimeDefang.