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Microsoft Loses Two Key Executives
DIY News writes "Microsoft lost two key employees amidst major reorganization announced last month. One of them has led several MSN efforts and another who was a top developer for the Office unit. According to Microsoft, 'when you have a company of 60,000 employees, people are coming and going all the time.'"
Gagne: Undoubtably made very wealthy in his time at the big M and wants to blow his wad racing around in cars, outside the Microsoft parking lot.
Partovi: Likely also found rolling around naked in money, wants to try another startup. (He probably noticed something Microsoft will need in the future and wants to develop it on his own and then sell it for more biggie bucks.)
Neither of these will likely have much real impact so this is a Slow News Day article.
Also, at the back of the papers is something about Nemesis has been spotted, it's heading toward the Sun and will reach it in 11 years, when we'll all die horribly. Hmm. Guess I don't have to worry about Social Security after all.
A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
This is one of those threads where people get free Karma by pontificating about the impending demise of Microsoft.
Help me take back Slashdot. When did 'News for Nerds' become 'FUD and Conspiracy Theories for Extremist Nutjobs'?
I reallly hope they find these guys, for the sakes of their families. Sure, 60,000 is a lot of people, but losing people... wow, and Microsoft acts like it is nothing.
First thrown chair!
Everybody's a libertarian 'till their neighbour's becomes a crack house.
They lost a couple of key executives.
I guess they'll have to just go to ACE Hardware for their keys, now, just like everyone else...
===
It's not too much of a shocker, people DO come and go all the time, even at big companies... status quo, IMHO.
MoM++ - A Classic Expanded - [Master of Magic 1.5]
http://mompp.sourceforge.net/
Why is this news? So they had two people move on with their lives... shocker. I'm under the impression the person that submitted this story thought, "LOL M$ IS GING OT BE PWND BY LINUXES NOW!!!!1 LOL"
What a stupid "story".
Here's the appropriate lyrics for those who want to sing along.
Altho this one might be more appropriate.
flyin' chairs.
Microsoft insiders report that the company still does not know exactly where the two executives went. Local law enforcement has become involved, and has collected a substantial amount of evidence, including two slightly bloody chairs. Microsoft has declined to comment on this evidence.
"The newly born animals are then whisked off for a quick run through a giant baking oven." --heard on Food Network
If only it was Gates and Balmer, the world would be a happier place...
..at least until a new dictator filled in the void left behind...
when you have a company of 60,000 employees, people are coming and going all the time
That's a very true statement, especially when a company is going through a reorganization. This means absolutely nothing other than a slow news day on Slashdot. I'm actually confused as to why this ended up getting approved for the front page.
You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life. --Winston Churchill
I wonder if Google are recruiting? I believe Google is a popular destination for ex-m$ One of them can help deliver their google web hosted solutions and the other can help with their search facility.
Good thing too.
Balmer's office furniture allowance is all gone for the quarter.
"A microprocessor... is a terrible thing to waste." --
GeneralEmergency
Stuff like this happens all the time at every company. This might be newsworthy in the financial backpages, but on slashdot it's a total non-story.
But the editors know this is perfect trollbait to start flaming and mocking Microsoft. It's obvious that Microsoft bashing is a surefire way of driving pagehits up.
Zonk, get a life. Post real news or get lost.
On the first one, the summary of the story should be "There is one less executive after Microsoft reorganization" and should be self-explanatory. In the case of Office, everyone must remember it's Microsoft's ca$h cow (not Windows), now responsible for 1/3 of profit. Internally, someone didn't like the [current] progress or sales of Office.
In the case of the second one, that's 50-50 as to whether it's a push or not.
Goooooooggggggggglllllleee!!!!!!!!!!!
If you could reason with religious people, there would be no religious people
Have they looked under the sofa? Often when I loose things they turn up there.
If they've lost executives, maybe they should have Steve checking under chairs.
You could help out and look for these missing people of which they speak.
Is it just me, or does there seem to be a lot of coverage of M$ around here lately. Just look up and down the page and you'll see Borg Images everywhere. Sigh...
Time to start this kind of thread, too :-)
I'm just curious: does anybody know how many chairs Mr. Ballmer has in his office?
I'm taking bets that most will be modded funny instead of insightful.
:)
Granted though... I could be moderated insightful for THIS post... so I'm betting against myself
The price is always right if someone else is paying.
Google hires two new key executives.
When I read this quote, "When you have a company of 60,000 employees, people are coming and going all the time." I couldn't help but be reminded of the comment made by Spinal Tap's manager about the band's declining audience.
Marty: The last time Tap toured America, they where, uh, booked
into 10,000 seat arenas, and 15,000 seat venues, and it
seems that now, on the current tour they're being
booked into 1,200 seat arenas, 1,500 seat arenas, and uh
I was just wondering, does this mean uh...the popularity
of the group is waning?
Ian: Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no...no, no, not at all.
I, I, I just think that the.. uh.. their appeal is
becoming more selective.
If someone says he and his monkey have nothing to hide, they almost certainly do.
For a moment, I thought that my weather widget was busted.
I thought it was a virus or something. This story explains everything. What a relief.
It's the engineers who do the actual work, anyway. A good executive just doesn't get in the way of engineers doing their work. A bad one tells engineers what to do in unnecessarily great detail. Of the two DonGa is a moderate loss. HadiP is not a loss at all. What did MSN achieve under him? Start.com? Puhleeze.
Not surprising that the main dude behind Office got off the train. There really isn't much more you can add to Office, is there, unless you can come up with something really new/different, but MS can't afford messing with its Office monopoly.
...when you don't validate your pointers.
Stick Men
From the slashdot article "quoting" Microsoft: According to Microsoft, 'when you have a company of 60,000 employees, people are coming and going all the time.
But in this Slate article is the snippet that we continue to have the lowest turnover in the industry? , (as part of a question Bill Gates raised about continuing to make Microsoft an attractive place to work).
Seems these two statements conflict, both tailored to serve the spin necessary. So, what is it? Is Microsoft suffering from an exodus or do they truly have one of the lowest turnovers in the industry?
Wow, talk about a rant coming out of left field. Neither Office nor MSN offer anything remotely "innovative". The executives responsible for these products are not contributing to the growth of the company. Why would anyone worry about their departure? MS would have something to worry about if this happened to one of their Longhorn-related development teams.
The fact Microsoft compelled to even comment about the departure suggests they're more important than Microsoft is willing to admit?
ELOI, ELOI, LAMA SABACHTHANI!?
Has anyone made a joke about Steve Ballmer throwing a chair yet?
Oh. Damn.
Shouldn't that be "looses"? Jeez, nice spelling slashdot.
ohh noes111 its teh chair1 rnu gagme1 run partomi1
rumor hazzit both executives were caught on IM by presidente Ballmer
A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
A
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how does one pontificate *and* moderate in the same thread?
Microsoft lost two key employees amidst major reorganization announced last month
See, That's what you get when you start rearranging stuff and can't remember where you put it.
Tordek, Dwarven Warrior - Juegos de Rol en Argentina
check underneath the couch? That's where when I lose something, I usually find them.
putting the 'B' in LGBTQ+
Wow. I knew Microsoft was a big company, but now they're so big that they're misplacing employees! I hope that the employees are alive and well when they find them. Maybe they need to form some sort of internal search and rescue team.
Coder's Stone: The programming language quick ref for iPad
Dear Colleague
...
I am the Fiduciary Collections Officer for the Bank of Mwuangabana e Sanctu Spiritu, Lagos, and am seeking by the same a trustworthy and reliable partner concerning the deposition in cash specie of 7.8 million dollars US by dependable American business the Microsoft Corporation for information leading to the identification of two missing persons. Now I find the money unclaimed and wish to transfer
Las qué passoun
tournoun pas maï
If these were 2048-bit or 4096-bit key executives, then I think microsoft really has reason to worry! ...But if they were 512-bit key executives, then this is barely news.
---
the pen is mightier than the sword, the sword is mightier than the court, the court is mightier than the pen.
You are confused because you are not seeing the bigger picture. Also it helps to RTFA. This is not just two lowly programmers, but *key* executives. Little different. In and of itself, this is not good. One was director of development for Office, the other person worked on MSFTs iTunes clone. But combined with other recent high-profile folks jumping ship, it does matter. Maybe not to you, but it does enough to Microsoft such that they will sue Google, throw chairs, and other what not. One big concern at Microsoft has always been how do you motivate people when their stock is not increasing in value anyway near the way it used to. So yeah, it was a big deal when Anders Hjelsberg left the sinking ship of Borland, and now Microsoft gets a bit of their own medicine. Please, shed a tear or so for them.
What a relief! I misread the /. headline in my RSS aggregator as
Microsoft Loses Two Executive Keys
I certainly do not prevent Bill or Steve from taking their daily dump. Bill just turn 50 and it's important for him to say regular.
Coderz 4 Life
I suppose it's a given that you never want to play musical chairs with Ballmer. :P
~X~
~X~
Bill: You're free now, boys. Run, play, live.
The executives cock their heads uncertainly, look at each other, and then bound off into the bush together. Bill reaches into the trunk, pulls out a Shop Vac, and proceeds to vacuum the interior of the trunk. Bill then walks calmly back to the driver's side of the vehicle, sits in the driver's seat and pulls the door shut. The engine starts. The car does a two point U turn and proceeds to leave the scene, going the way it came.
A republic cannot succeed till it contains a certain body of men imbued with the principles of justice and honour.
uses Google search to find them..... I simply can't believe I am the first one to use this.
A most overlooked advantage to owning a computer is if they foul up there's no law against wacking them around a bit.
What is all this discussion about karma and talking about Microsoft's demise?
Did anyone read the head lines? "Micorsoft lost two executives"! Where is the amber alert when you need one?
Let's start a search party and go help find them. They may be lost and hurt somewhere in Redmond. They need to be found quickly before they wander away and are lost forever.
I mean there is no telling if they might wander into another company and start making trouble all over again. We must collect them and return them, then we know where they all are. We must keep them isolated to the Microsoft campus. That is the only way to keep this from becoming a major outbreak.
When you're in such a huge organization as Microsoft, or Google, or a Fortune 500, great management of any kind is important. The best managers make the office politics transparent, the resources needed to finish a project always available, and is a communication and trust layer between the engineers who have those great ideas and upper management who are blinded by other factors when it comes to the importance of the engineers' work.
Also moving up the ladder, those executives have the power to change an organization, and the great ones do it for the better.
I believe that in both management and in the technical aspect of the corporate world there are bad apples in both areas. Bad managers, bad engineers, and without good managers and engineers alike, all would hate their jobs.
A quick note: I'm working on a project right now at the city hall of a very large city. There's myself who is the low level information guy (mostly monkey work), my boss who's a professional materials manager, and then there's the project manager who's a great public speaker. He's the one that's been carrying this project because he's able to cut through all the bullshit with all the city divisions, and no doubt he'll be the one carrying us when our project comes to council next month.
This is a perfect time to showcase Micrsoft Vista's new search
program.
Can't go wrong with that.
Gunilla
And baby Jesus wept.
Then he got a real job.
Gunilla
It has been reported that a number of companies whose main business is making furnitures like chairs had their stock prices going up more than 25% after Microsoft announced they will be buying daily shippings of new chairs.
According to Microsoft, 'when you have a company of 60,000 employees, people are coming and going all the time.'
Sounds like the manager of the Taco Bell down the street, except replace "60,000" with "sixteen".
This is one of those threads where people get "+5 Insightful" for criticizing the mod system.
;-)
(Know how I could tell? It says "Slashdot" up in the corner.)
"Microsoft loses two key...": UPDATED:
REDMOND, WA (Reuters):
Bill Gates dropped the bombshell in a recent interview after the exit of two key executives, one to spend more time with a racecar hobby, and the other to start his own company. "That's it," he said, with a shake in his voice. "We're closing up shop. Without these two guys, I just don't think I can do it anymore... Balmie and I just can't keep throwing chairs as if..." His voice trailed off, and he ended his statement prematurely, but a Microsoft spokesperson stepped up to fill in the rest of the details.
"There are a lot of misconceptions out there about the real function of top executives at any major corporation, but as it turns out, when this particular pair left, no more code was written, no more EULAs were drafted, no more patents were filed. Everything stopped! We've also noticed huge cracks appearing in virtually every building on the main Microsoft campus. It's a disaster, but the decision has been made to turn over all Microsoft resources, including intellectual property, customer contracts, and funds, directly over to Linux Torvalds. It's an unfortunately situation, but we see no alternative."
Stay tuned for more details on this startling, but inevitable turn of events.
In other news, Harriet Meiers has opted for an early retirement package from the Supreme Court... to spend more time with her family...
Seeing bad movies only encourages them. Watch responsibly
In Soviet Russia the insensitive clod is YOU!
It is possible it is 6 very well paid and well looked after individuals just decieding to "retire" or "start their own business" ...
Maybe they know something the public doesnt.
Nah - sometimes some peeps - at least I, love Microsofts products. When tired of KDE being fing slow: I fire up my old 486 equipped with W98, only 32 megs, only @100MHz.. and it feels blazing fast. kk - it crashes fast too, but sometimes in really fantastic and interesting ways! /Patrik
I wonder why Microsoft is getting rid of employees? It seems to me the Google drain (as mentioned before on /.) has been detrimentally affecting Microsoft. I would think they'd try to keep a few of their employees.
But it's a shame that something like this has happened. That's why I always label my boxes, to prevent just this sort of thing. Hopefully they have enough food and water to survive until they're located.
https://www.eff.org/https-everywhere
I have. Over there change comes from the bottom only to be fucked up by those on the top. People five levels up in the management chain have not a slightest clue about customer needs. All they do is throw buzzwords around and sell their stock grants. Microsoft will SERIOUSLY benefit from reduction in managerial headcount. In fact, I'm convinced things would go much better if tomorrow SteveB fired half of mid-to-top level management and threatened to fire the other half if stock doesn't go up.
One other thing about large orgs is that there are no irreplaceable people. When someone departs there's usually a line of better qualified (or better connected, which happens more often) candidates waiting to take his/her place. There are TONS of smart people at Microsoft, yet it seems only dirt comes to the top. Exceptions are rare and only confirm the observation.
So cry me a fucking river. Two folks with overinflated egos have parted ways with MSFT, therere are twenty lined up to replace them. With any luck this will be the change for the better.
At the very least, lowering of morale - execs / long time developers leaving definitely will lead to a good number of people re-thinking their careers @ MS. Living out here near Redmond, our company is getting quite a few resumes from former MS folks - some of these folks have been there for over 1/2 a decade... Some folks that were interviewed are simply leaving coz they think there are better things out there and their 1/2 decade or more spent at MS is making them more valuable outside that at MS and earning them more $$.
Walt Disney Company: 129,000
International Business Machines(IBM): 369,277
Samsung Group(2003): 195,000
Citigroup, Inc: 294,000
Sun Microsystems: 35,000
Apple Computer, Inc: 13,426
Google, inc: 3,021
Electronic Arts: 6,100
Novell: 6,186
Dell Computers: 55,200
Hewlett-Packard Company: 151,000
Canon, Inc: 108,257
Oracle Corporation: 41,658
By the way, the same site lists Microsoft Corporation as having 57,000. So either they've hired 3,000 this year, or somebody mis-counted. I find it amusing that Microsoft is making such a fuss over Google, a company 1/20th it's size. Kind of like a lion roaring at a mouse! And consider that it would only take a 20,000 people to leave Microsoft to join Oracle to make Oracle bigger than Microsoft.
Anyway, these numbers aren't meant to prove anything. It's just that I somehow thought Microsoft was bigger than that. Just some morning number-punching while my brain wakes up.
as all his engineers have quit after recurring nightmares of flying chairs disturbed their sleeping habits and gone on to more rewarding work in computer science; this seems the only way to save the ms patform. At the same time the justice department has drawn charges of terrorist activities against Bill Gates for causing a national security risk by exposing source code.
And his best possible decission is to left Microsoft for a surely more trusty carrer on car racing. Cool!
According to Microsoft, 'when you have a company of 60,000 employees, people are coming and going all the time.'
Are you reading this Mr. Gates?
This is not what it seems. This is a virus releasing clones of itself. These seemingly innocent executives will find some unsuspecting cell--I mean company-- and infect it. Thus spreading the virulent culture that we have come to know as Micro$oft.
You go to war with the Clones you have, not with the Clones you wish you had.
Contrary to popular belief, coding is not all free blow-jobs and beer. Those things cost MONEY!
Yes, and be sure to make that clear to your project managers.
Sure I'm paranoid, but am I paranoid enough?
Microsoft has placed the biggest furniture order ever with Ikea.
I don't know about the other guy, but Hadi Partovi might be a significant loss to Microsoft. See this blog written by a Microsoft insider last summer: Hadi Partovi what are you thinking?