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Apple Sued Over Potential Hearing Loss
freaktheclown writes "A man is suing Apple, claiming that the iPod can cause hearing loss for those who use it." From the article: "The iPod players are 'inherently defective in design and are not sufficiently adorned with adequate warnings regarding the likelihood of hearing loss,' according to the complaint, filed Tuesday in U.S. District Court in San Jose, Calif., on behalf of John Kiel Patterson of Louisiana. The suit, which Patterson wants certified as a class-action, seeks compensation for unspecified damages and upgrades that will make iPods safer."
If he gets Apple, then I'm calling iRiver for the damage they've done to my hearing.
Warning: Nail Clippers will cut nails.
I am going to mail a large salami to the judge, in hopes that he will use it to smack the plaintiff.
This sig, aah-ah, is comin' like a ghost-sig...
He's infringing my patent: US PAT 99846321-666 "A method for obtaining stupidly large amounts of financial compensation from commercial organisations by suing them because they failed to point out (rightly or otherwise) something mind-numbingly obvious about a potential (real or otherwise) hazard related to the use of their product/s that anyone with a small degree of common sense would be competent to identify for themselves and thus take appropriate action."
AT&ROFLMAO
Ouch! I've just poked myself in the eye with my finger! I'm suing God!
The real problem with this kind of device is that you can damage your hearing a small amount. You then turn up the volume to compensate, and damage your hearing more. Going deaf by induction, if you like. I recall hearing about this in 1988 though, so it's not exactly news by any definition other than Slashdot's.
[1] An actual girl! Honest!
I am TheRaven on Soylent News
... they want their lawsuit back.
Wasn't the same thing done over the Sony Walkman?
...Rob
The American Dream isn't an SUV and a house in the suburbs; it's Don't Tread On Me.
For mass-producing pop music so bad it makes me want to shove sharp objects in my ear just so I won't have to hear it anymore?
Monstar L
Beware: In C++, your friends can see your privates!
It seems like saying I should sue /. for keeping me a wake all night to try and get first posts.
And then you post and come in second.. Oh, the humanity...
Yeah but, you are in USA, where, you know, people is stupid..
I got a great example with product warnings (agree, some are from Tesco, a UK company) but lot of them are from USA companies.
I love these:
Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
Disposable razor:
Do not use this product during an earthquake.
Hand-held Massaging Device
Do not use while sleeping or unconscious. [O MY F GOD]
Microwave Oven:
Do not use for drying pets.
Anyway, better take a look at them, really funny... but makes you think... in a country where anyone can sue anybody for anything... what can you expect.
Ubuntu is an African word meaning 'I can't configure Debian'
I'd sue, claiming loss of moderation points which is quite clearly detrimental to ones health and state of mind. Slashdot should have a clear and obvious warning on every page stating that moderation can be harmful to your posts.
Apple has countersued John Kiel Patterson's finger for moving the iPod's volume beyond the 93db range, which has possibly caused damage to his hearing.
His finger will be required to testify in court that it indeed did raise the volume beyond acceptable levels, his ears were also subpoenaed in to testify about their injuries.
Noone is sure about Patterson's brain, it has gone missing and possibly is living out of the country.
He who knows best knows how little he knows. - Thomas Jefferson
"The iPod players are 'inherently defective in design and are not sufficiently adorned with adequate warnings regarding the likelihood of hearing loss..."
So basically, he's telling us that if there was a big sticker pasted on the side that said "Hey, Asshat, don't turn it up too loud, you will lose your hearing!" that everything would have been OK, and he would not have sued?
*sigh*
What an asshat.
Harpo Tunnel Syndrome--my wrist feels funny.
If they do that, I'll claim that the lawyers caused me hearing loss.
i can't hear you. type louder.
iDiot
They let me drive my car faster than the legal limit, and I received a ticket. Nowhere in the users manual did it warn me of that!
So it won't really be a very big story, then?
Guy 1: "Can you hear me now?"
Guy 2: "What?"
Guy 1: "Can you hear me now?"
Guy 2: "Eh? What did you say?"
Guy 1: "Can you hear me now?"
Guy 2: "Ugh? YO! What did you say?"
Guy 1: "Can you hear me now?"
Guy 2: "Whaaat?"
Guy 1: "Can you hea...."
Guy 2: "HEY! Yo! Hello?!"
Guy 1: "...r me now?"
Guy 2: "I'M LISTENING TO MY IPOD, CAN YOU SPEAK LOUDER???"
Guy 1: "Awe, fuck this guy!" *click*
Guy 2: "I'M GOING TO TURN OFF MY IPOD NOW, CAN YOU SPEAK UP?"
*tone*
Guy 2: "Yeah, I'm doing good... you?"
Live forever, or die trying.
All this talk of Hot Coffee... Excuse me, I have to go rub one out. Where did I leave GTA again?
These warnings can be very annoying. On my Sony Ericsson, every time I hit SPEAKERPHONE, I must confirm that I am aware that this may damage my hearing. AFAIK, there is no way to permanently shut this reminder off, presumably because someone else could pick up my phone and not receive the warning.
This is slowly getting out of control...
Do not insert iPod in any bodily orifices, no matter how convenient.
Do not use headphone cord to tow your boat.
Do not superglue iPod to upper arm because you are too cheap to buy an exercise armband.
Do not pull out battery and attempt to eat lithium goo.
Do not rip off plastic cover, whittle it into a knife, and plunge it into your heart.
Steve Jobs is partially deaf, and he tested the iPod before it was released.
Which, interestingly, might prove that briefly testing the iPod can already cause partial deafness?
Warning: use of lawyers may result in economic ruin.