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How Do IT Guys Get Respect and Not Become BOFHs?

An anonymous reader writes "I work for a small software company (around 60 people) as the sole IT guy. It's my first time in a position like this and after about 1.5 years I'm starting to get a bit burned out. I try to be friendly, helpful, and responsive and I get no respect whatsoever. Users tend to be flat-out rude when they have a problem, violate our pretty liberal policies constantly, and expect complex projects to be finished immediately upon requesting them. My knee-jerk reaction is to be a bastard, although I've avoided it up to this point. It's getting harder. For those of you who have been doing this a lot longer, how do you get a reasonable level of respect from your users while not being a jerk?"

142 of 902 comments (clear)

  1. lmgtfy by beefsprocket · · Score: 5, Funny

    I've sent a few of the tougher cases to http://lmgtfy.com/ Usually that smartens them up a bit without having to have too many words ;)

    1. Re:lmgtfy by Goldberg's+Pants · · Score: 5, Funny

      And if they don't get the hint, try this less subtle one.

    2. Re:lmgtfy by TheLink · · Score: 2, Interesting

      "But it doesn't work on my browser!"

      lmgtfy _requires_ javascript to work and the previous BoFH might have disabled javascript (or installed noscript) on everyone's browser...

      --
    3. Re:lmgtfy by BrokenHalo · · Score: 5, Funny

      Sometimes terrorism works...

      ...like locking the volume on their machine at max and setting their screensaver to play "badger badger mushroom mushroom" after 30 seconds' inactivity. If anyone calls to complain, just tell them that it doesn't do that if they keep working... >:-D

    4. Re:lmgtfy by jank1887 · · Score: 3, Funny

      Blocked by Websense

    5. Re:lmgtfy by manly_15 · · Score: 2, Insightful

      There's a sizeable segment of the population which simply can't search properly. Being able to synthesize a question into appropriate keywords is a difficult skill for many. Try watching a novice search Google on a variety of topics. Not only will they use poorly worded queries, but it's likely they will only go to the first hit. Many users give up if the first hit isn't what they want. Only the advanced users know about tabbed browsing and will load up a series of results to scan.

      So, the reason why users don't google it in the first place is that they don't trust search (though Google has some of the highest trust levels of any search engine). What really needs to happen is that workplaces which have users online need to offer more comprehensive training on internet literacy; unfortunately, it's cheaper just to hire someone to handle all of the stupid questions instead.

    6. Re:lmgtfy by UncHellMatt · · Score: 5, Insightful

      I work as the lone IT person in a police department. It's remarkable how much more patient and calm one can be with lusers who are A) Armed and B) Much, much bigger than me.

      That said, in this position I gained some semblance of respect from my users by doing several things many people don't "teach" you. First and foremost, I set boundaries. If someone calls me in the middle of the night (being a 24/7 "shop", that sort of thing is inevitable), and it's for something like they can't print, I tell them that I'll help them when I get in, and let them know that while I don't mind that they called me, try to keep it to emergencies. Also, I made sure that the supervisors (shift sergeants) were aware of what would count as an emergency, and we talked that over. Maybe what THEY view as an emergency I wouldn't, and vice versa. Another important thing, I go by "when in Rome". Cops are a very, very different breed of user. Most I wouldn't trust with anything more complex than an abacus and smoke signals, and even then I would want someone standing by with a fire extinguisher. So I try to keep as many processes as I can as simple as I can. In other environments I've worked, when managing a network for a software development house, it was simple: I made everything as obfuscated as possible and then had 20 pages of documentation for every 2 steps taken in a process.

      OK, I kid (sorta) on that last bit. But the point is, try to style your IT work to fit the people you're dealing with.

      What I'm saying is don't let people walk all over you. Demand some respect. If you come over to someone's desk to help them, and they're treating you like some drive through window fast food help, walk away, and tell their supervisor you want to be treated with a little more kindness before you'll deal with them again. You don't need to electrocute users in order to gain that respect, though it IS a more fun method.

  2. Be firm.. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Be firm, but don't be a jerk. Be reasonable, and honest - justify and explain. In writing if it helps. Just don't promise more than you can deliver, and be explicitly clear about the complexity of solutions.

    1. Re:Be firm.. by frank_adrian314159 · · Score: 5, Funny

      Be reasonable, and honest - justify and explain.

      And then, if they still bother you, shoot them.

      --
      That is all.
    2. Re:Be firm.. by Sfing_ter · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Please do not lie to the lad. Even after he has done ALL OF THAT, it will:
      a) still be his fault email doesn't work and
      b) no they didn't make any changes to ANY settings
      c) still be his fault the computers don't work right

      People fear what they do not understand, yes there will be that one person in 50 who actually gets it and can actually do things but they are only there to keep you going. I have seen the very best natured, good hearted individual turn into a BOFH, contributor to Work or Spoon, and all around terse individual - when he is working. He is fine when he is off work. It took 2 years for that to happen and I actually didn't think it would... but alas, intelligent people will only suffer fools for so long...

      --
      A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. Emo Philips
    3. Re:Be firm.. by Martian_Kyo · · Score: 3, Insightful

      I agree, use reason and e-mails (to avoid he said she said situations) and quote other people as much as you can. If priorities are a problem ask your boss.
      If your boss doesn't want to be bothered all the time , establish a procedure which he/she will approve which will describe how your priorities are handled. Be simple with it. Use First in first out system, unless the request is critical and may endanger the system. If people complain why aren't you doing something about their problem, quote the procedure.
      IT people are supposed to have very strong sense of logic, use that.

      It wont be easy, especially in smaller companies where nepotism is usually very prevalent.

      Good luck!

    4. Re:Be firm.. by ikono · · Score: 5, Insightful
      Problem is, it takes a sense of logic to appreciate a sense of logic. Most of the people referring to IT do not have that sense. They justify their demands by reasoning that

      "oh, those IT fuckers are too damn lazy. They say they have a thousand open tickets, but they really only have 2 or 3."

      Or

      "They are too lazy to address those tickets fast enough."

      Or maybe they just fall back on the old standby

      "MY request more important than those others. do mine first."

      There is only so much one can take before their logic circuits get overloaded, and they default to the Jackass Mentality.

      --
      Karma is for whores
    5. Re:Be firm.. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Insightful

      Have lunch together with your colleagues, instead of eating a sandwich at your desk.
      That makes you seem more like a human than a utility.

    6. Re:Be firm.. by Sobrique · · Score: 5, Informative

      Wish I had mod points, because your comment is insightful. If you 'keep the distance' from your colleagues, you'll gain hate, because people don't understand computers or you. If you have lunch with them, then you'll know them personally, and they'll feel a little more comfortable about talking to you about little IT problems, which have been annoying them.
      Alternatively, make a point of going for a walk around each of the departments you support EVERY day, to say 'hi' and maybe see if everything's ok.
      In my experience, most of the frustration with 'IT' is very often trivial problems, that escalate until they get annoyed enough to go see IT about it. By having a walk 'round the site, you'll spot these, have a bit of a chat, pick up on the 'my mouse is a bit odd' type problems, and get 'em sorted proactively. It sounds like slacking off - and to be fair, it is, sort of - but it's the kind that will end up with your IT department appreciated and welcomed. Call it 'user support clinic' or something, if you need to justify it.
      It will also let you see the smouldering before a fire breaks out that you'll have to go pounce on and fix - usually users will be bitching to each other about something being 'a bit flakey' long before it gets to IT as a critical fault.

    7. Re:Be firm.. by St.Creed · · Score: 2, Insightful
      Here's my advice.
      • 1) Prioritize. Make a list of the things you need to fix and fix them in the order of priority. If someone has a new issue, slap a priority on it based on some rules and put it on the list at the spot it should be. If someone wants to change priorities, have them talk to the people who own the priority issues above them.
      • 2) Make sure you have management backup. If your boss does not back you up *firmly* this whole exercise is pointless anyway, better get out and find a new job.
      • 3) Don't touch machines you have no need to fix. Where I worked, reliability and uptime went up to 99.999% because we banned the admins from touching the critical environments unless the software engineers who had designed said environments okayed it. Patches and virus definitions were always tested on a standby machine with the exact same configuration. Virtual Servers are your friend.

      I'm not sure if you ever heard of ITIL - if you haven't get a hold of the ITIL Foundation book and read it. It's a collection of best practices for service management and delivery and you really sound like you need to implement a few of those.

      --
      Therefore, by the (faulty) logic you're using, you're just a cow with a keyboard - osu-neko (2604)
    8. Re:Be firm.. by JohnFluxx · · Score: 3, Funny

      Heh, I have this image of a man in a white coat with a mouse hanging round his neck, like a doctor with a stethoscope.

      Then when people say "my mouse is acting a funny", he take the mouse from around his neck down and plug it in to the machine. "Hmm, seems fine with this mouse, take this". "Oh wow! So quick! You're my hero!"

    9. Re:Be firm.. by dkleinsc · · Score: 5, Insightful

      This is really the key right there: For most people, someone they know personally that fixes their problems is friendly and helpful. Someone they don't know personally that fixes their problems gets about the same level of respect and attention as their plumber.

      The other related techniques are:
      1. Learn to speak in their language, rather than speaking your language. If they call it a "whizbang", call it a "whizbang" when you're around them, even if they're wrong. At the very least, avoid computer-speak as much as possible.
      2. Use their name. If you see them, say "good morning/afternoon, Bob" or something similar.
      3. When you fix a problem that they can fix, you can tell them something like "next time this happens, you can try ...". Obviously, don't tell them anything that could make things worse, but learning how to clean out a mouseball or check the plugs might prevent you from getting called in and at the very least will give them something to do that feels useful while you fix the problem.

      Remember than when someone contacts IT, they've gone from feeling like a capable adult to feeling like a stupid helpless child. Part of what you have to do is convince them they're a capable adult as you're fixing the problem.

      --
      I am officially gone from /. Long live http://www.soylentnews.com/
    10. Re:Be firm.. by Ihlosi · · Score: 4, Funny
      What to use for a cape?

      Nothing. Capes tend to get sucked into cooling fans.

    11. Re:Be firm.. by Skye16 · · Score: 4, Insightful

      The interesting thing to keep in mind is that your users are often operating under deadlines. Deadlines they could have made if the liberal policies currently in effect were not in effect, and as such, you are seen as an impediment.

      It's short sightedness on their part, probably coupled with poor planning on either their or a superior's part, but the stress they feel is still there, and it usually manifests itself in said rudeness, skirting of said polices, etc.

      For example, our IT department decided to implement a much more comprehensive firewall than before. It had the unintended side effect of blocking eclipse plugin downloads (which apparently usually operate with an SSL certificate, which is currently being hijacked by our organization's "security solution", and so refuses to work).

      I could either a: wait the 3 days (made even worse by not knowing, at the time, it would take 3 days or 3 months) and do zero work, costing my project a few hundred / low thousands of dollars in lost labor in the process, or b: figure out how to get around it. Being a nerd yourself, which would you submit to? Especially if you have a deliverable 5 days out, and you don't really fancy the idea of working 18 hour days just to make up for the lost 3 days in the short term?

      As soon as I had access to the tools I needed, when I truly needed them, I stopped skirting the system. I'm not there to be a jerk and I'm not trying to make IT's job miserable. But I am (I hope understandably) irritated when IT institutes something new like this, without fully testing it with a pilot program, without noting the majority of these gaps in expected service in advance, and without notifying any of the programs operating within the official infrastructure in advance (some of our programs have their own segregated intranets for their development, and so don't really have this problem - mostly because they have zero connectivity to anything outside themselves).

      So keep in mind - what seems to be a perfectly reasonable policy to you (and, in fact, it is), is going to cause some people some (in their mind) unnecessary stress as they try to meet their own deadlines. This doesn't give them the right to be an ass to you, but it may help if you put their behavior in context. The subtleties between being genuinely stressed and upset and being a rude jerk for the sake of being a rude jerk are sometimes lost.

    12. Re:Be firm.. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Have lunch together with your colleagues, instead of eating a sandwich at your desk.
      That makes you seem more like a human than a utility.

      I would argue that having lunch with colleagues (clients, users) encourages more "Hey, such and such is wrong with my computer, maybe you can come take a look at it, we're friends, right?" jumping the queue. Probably not a big deal in a smaller company, but where I work there are 600 users in the shared cafeteria, and our IT people can't even stand in line to pay for food without getting hassled with computer questions. It's a pretty one-sided friendship to maintain.

    13. Re:Be firm.. by NateTech · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Get going on the goals... how you get there isn't important, but stop waiting for your boss or someone else to do it for you. Want to work in aerospace, lay out a plan and go do it. If it means you pay for school, fine. If the slacker boss decides you're worth keeping around for a while and will pay for it, fine. But it's your life. Live it while you have it. Screw waiting around for him though.

      You don't have to quit, although it MAY be one means to your end. Use your analytical powers to figure out more than one path to your goal and then go DO one, if that one doesn't pan out, try ANOTHER one. The vast majority of fulfilled successful people just DON'T GIVE UP and keep going toward what they want. Bad boss, good job, bad job, whatever... just circumstances. The goal is the driving force, not the circumstances.

      Your boss sounds like a serious loser, but he's a paycheck for now, and someone you may remember someday later as the "worst boss ever", but be smarter than him and work toward your goals.

      As far as the singing... in one sentence you say you want to work in aerospace, and in the next few paragraphs you daydream about switching careers. Make a decision. Singing can continue to be a hobby and bring you well-rounded joy as you work through your aerospace goal.

      You DO know what to do, you just need to go force yourself to make those things happen or change tactics smartly until you get where you're going. When you get in the car to go somewhere, you don't worry about HOW you drive the car, you think about the path to get there, you take detours around the potholes or construction other people are doing in your path, whatever... if this guy has to be the asshole who won't shut up in the passenger seat, fine... just ignore him and drive.

      Your life, your happiness... if you play by your rules. He's figured you out... you'll sit and stew and do work for him while you try to figure out how he messes with you. Even if it's completely unconscious, he gets something from you -- are you getting where you want to go with him? If he's crippling your ability to get where you want to go... only you know that.

      Think action verbs... go, be, do. Let him do whatever he wants... it doesn't matter. You're sitting in the car, parked, listening to him and trying to see if he'll give you a driving lesson. Put the car in Drive and hit the gas. He wants to get out of your car/life... let him out at the next convenient stopping point.

      I also am not going to take any time to clean this up -- got other things to do. But, figured you might need a push. Get going. Pick a destination and head that direction. Flat tire, get out and change it. Need gas, make some money and re-fuel the car. You get the idea.

      --
      +++OK ATH
  3. Try the slow down method by jackb_guppy · · Score: 5, Interesting

    If they are not nice, delay the response.

    Nice people get fast turn responses.

    Just check with your boss first.

    1. Re:Try the slow down method by teh+moges · · Score: 4, Interesting

      No need to check with the boss, just make sure you prioritize first. Urgent requests get answered first, nice requests second and bastard requests... later. Direct everything through a helpdesk system, so when people are bastards you can inform their bosses that their behavior is making you uncomfortable. At my last job, we had a constant problem of new staff turning up on their first day and their bosses ringing us to say that they need a new user setup straight away. For one-off cases, this wasn't a problem*, but for those that didn't learn, we took a good few days to do it. Paying to have staff sitting there with nothing to do usually teaches them quickly. * we usually left it a day anyway, firstly because some of the aspects of the setup did take time, and secondly, to allow us to stall if they become repeat offenders.

    2. Re:Try the slow down method by Marful · · Score: 5, Insightful

      LOL @ Rush first...


      I do estimating at my work (and also a little IT) and we used to have a system for "rush quotes" that people could submit. Over the course of a month, it turned out that every quote was a rush quote, which made the system pointless.

      So, I'd be wary of instituting something with a "rush" system...

      BR

    3. Re:Try the slow down method by Falconhell · · Score: 2, Funny

      Even easier, just tell them its under consideration (Meaning:I have lost the job details).

      If they ask again its under active consideration.(I have started looking for the job details).

      I mean seriously they are users, they get what I damn well want to give them and nothing else.

      At least I dont have to deal with programmers and developers. If I did I would invest in axe, lime and old carpet shares.

      (-:

    4. Re:Try the slow down method by Eivind · · Score: 5, Interesting

      Oh, you just need to make it clear to them in a language they understand: Money.

      We've got "rush-jobs", as in "drop whatever you're doing and do this NOW" jobs.

      They are charged triple the normal rate. The intention is loud and clear: If it's not important enough that you're willing to pay triple to have it fixed right-now, then it's not a rush-job.

      Works fine. I seldom get more than 2-3 rush-jobs in any given month.

    5. Re:Try the slow down method by phantomfive · · Score: 5, Insightful

      I point it out directly, matter of factly. "That's not a very nice thing to say," or "that's not very respectful." Honestly, and not angrily. Then I wait. Awkward silence.........for them. In most cases they will get a goofy grin and say, "yeah" or something and then we are friends again. In some cases they storm out angrily, but that's their fault (what are they going to say, "he told me it wasn't a nice thing to say!!" is going to make HIM look bad, because you were just trying to help out), and suddenly there's less work for you.

      If this doesn't work, it's probably because you're not respecting other people enough. Expect respect from everyone, but respect everyone as well (even if they don't deserve it).

      --
      Qxe4
    6. Re:Try the slow down method by JWSmythe · · Score: 2, Funny

          I had a system for this. It was a tip jar.

          If someone laughed at the tip jar and didn't drop in cash, their request went to the bottom of the pile.

          If I heard change hit the jar, they were just above the other.

          People got smart. If they had something that needed to be done immediately, they'd show me the cash, and I'd watch them put it in. Priority was dictated by the size of the tip. And, for those who saw my shooting range target hanging on the wall by my desk, they knew better than to pull the money back out once it went in. You can run, it just gives me time to aim. :)

          I was once anonymously tipped with two airline bottles of tequila. I wish I knew who did it, they would have gotten better service for a while. It's one thing to tip me cash. It's another to bring my liquid lunch to me. :) I had a sneaky suspicion who did it, and she was always nice to me, so she got good service anyways. :) I did get informally warned about it, but all I could say was "I didn't put it there, you'll have to find who did it."

          Stand over me, laugh at the tip jar, and demand it get done now? Sorry, I won't be able to get to this until next week. I have other priorities that have to get done first (like checking my personal email, reading Slashdot, taking an extended smoke break, and maybe a nap).

      --
      Serious? Seriousness is well above my pay grade.
    7. Re:Try the slow down method by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Informative

      Depends, some companies have interdepartmental billing. If you use the time of an employee from one department, you get charged for it. We implemented a charge for service for fixing problems/implementing new systems, etc, at my last company. The charges affect the profitability of the business unit, repeat offenders have a way of shaping up or shipping out once their boss finds out that IT time fixing that machine is affecting the bosses bonus.

    8. Re:Try the slow down method by Allicorn · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Spot on. I'm pretty sure this is a general truism of processes which allow users to declare urgency themselves.

      Give users the option and every support ticket is critical, every project is urgent, every callout is an emergency, every bug is fatal.

      The satisfyingly BoFH-esque response is, of course, that every coffee is critical, every smoke is urgent, every liquid lunch an emergency and every complaint about poor service... fatal.

      --
      OMG!!! Ponies!!!
    9. Re:Try the slow down method by Johnny+Mnemonic · · Score: 4, Insightful

      I'm sure you reciprocated, too. I'm sure you tipped when you needed a question answered by HR, when you needed an expense report completed I imagine you gave them 5% for 'priority service'. You probably left money on your desk for the janitorial service.

      If you demanded personal money from me just so I could get you to your the job for which you are paid, you sure as hell had better not need anything from me, ever. Including a funding request for your project.

      --

      --
      $tar -xvf .sig.tar
    10. Re:Try the slow down method by spoco2 · · Score: 2, Insightful

      What a god awful method... pay for service to a service person who is already paid to do the job they are asking you to do.

      Great work.

      Sorry, but you sound very much like a BOFH

    11. Re:Try the slow down method by PitaBred · · Score: 2

      He's asking for how NOT to become a BOFH. The step-by-step guide you posted is kind of the exact opposite of what he's wanting... ;)

    12. Re:Try the slow down method by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Informative

      In my experience this is not how those situations go. Most often, people are passive aggressive. Telling them they aren't being nice isn't a response that makes sense in those situations. In my experience, brutal honesty is the best policy. If people push for more than is reasonable they are told outright - your request is unreasonable. Don't be an ass; just be firm and unwavering.

    13. Re:Try the slow down method by Sobrique · · Score: 3, Interesting

      Make it departmental chargable, make it clear to the user, and ask for a cost code and manager approval. If their boss agrees that it's a rush job, then fair enough. We do this for backup restores on a 'priority service' - it's because our tapes are offsite, and so we have to wait for the daily collection, or pay for a courier.
      It's amazing how many 'this is urgent DO IT NOW' type requests disappear in this situation.

    14. Re:Try the slow down method by unitron · · Score: 3, Insightful

      Re: your sig-

      "In free countries, how did the powerful become powerful? Have they done something you couldn't do?"

      More like, stuff my conscience wouldn't let me do.

      --

      I see even classic Slashdot is now pretty much unusable on dial up anymore.

    15. Re:Try the slow down method by stonewallred · · Score: 3, Interesting

      When I ran an HVAC/R company, I did not charge for emergency (after hours) calls, unlike every other company in town did. And my logic was very simple. When I advertise an after hours service and set a price for the service, I am saying I am willing to come (or send a tech) at any time and fix your HVAC/R problem. I never liked working after hours when i worked for other companies, and never knew a tech that liked it either.So with my business, there would be no charge for emergency calls. That way I got to define what was an emergency, not the customer. Probably lost a customer or two over the years, but the customers I gained and kept from this policy more than made up for those losses. Nothing like a customer who you just fixed their equipment at 2AM on a Sunday morning and charged them the same if it had been 9AM on Monday morning. It engendered a lot of customer loyalty and referrals.

    16. Re:Try the slow down method by imneverwrong · · Score: 3, Interesting

      What a god awful method... pay for service to a service person who is already paid to do the job they are asking you to do.

      You have misunderstood the OP, and basic economic theory. Dealing with a rush job is costly to the IT staff, and to the other customers whose jobs are delayed in response. Recovering the full cost of such a job is the only way to not waste resources. Without such cost recovery, people will gladly cause a loss to other internal divisions of $80000 to save their own division $500, and everyone will flag their jobs as "rush".

      He is not advocating getting paid twice for the same job.

    17. Re:Try the slow down method by fain · · Score: 4, Informative

      I don't know the specifics in this case of course, but it's hardly unusual for companies to have some kind of internal billing between departments. This is, in fact, the best way I know of to get managers to realize and honestly consider the actual costs of their IT requirements. Ask anyone about backup and recovery policies, and you'll find out that ALL of their data needs to be backed up hourly, saved for 20 years, and MUST be restored within 30 minutes if a system crashes. Present them with monthly cost for that, and often they'll reconsider.

      Charging per support ticket, and extra for rush jobs, would be another useful approach of the same kind.

    18. Re:Try the slow down method by CmdrGravy · · Score: 2, Funny

      I'm guessing you must work in the developing world somewhere, the Middle East or most probably India, am I right ?

      Bribery might work for you in the short term but if you really want to turn your country into a viable entity able to compete with the big boys ( the EU, China, Russia ) on the world stage you need to stamp this sort of thing out and organise yourself more intelligently.

  4. How do I get a reasonable level of respect? by robvangelder · · Score: 4, Funny

    finish complex projects immediately upon them requesting.

    1. Re:How do I get a reasonable level of respect? by Kenja · · Score: 5, Insightful

      No, that will result in you being taken for granted and labeled a failure when you dont produce the same level of results at the same speed next time.

      Use the Scotty principal. Estimate the time needed as three times what you expect, then when it takes you twice as long you're a genius for finishing it early.

      --

      "Have you ever thought about just turning off the TV, sitting down with your kids, and hitting them?"
    2. Re:How do I get a reasonable level of respect? by dov_0 · · Score: 4, Funny

      I try to be friendly, helpful, and responsive

      I think we found the problem here!

      --
      sudo mount --milk --sugar /cup/tea /mouth /etc/init.d/relax start
    3. Re:How do I get a reasonable level of respect? by Green+Salad · · Score: 4, Funny

      Either that or fuck the boss's hot 18-year-old daughter.

      Um... you must be new here. This is slashdot.

      If I manage to stammer a coherent sentence to a hot daughter, it has never resulted in sex. ...just violence ..from her father.

      I do manage to get some amusing facial expressions with the ew...yuck.

    4. Re:How do I get a reasonable level of respect? by Goldberg's+Pants · · Score: 3, Funny

      Could be worse, it could have resulted in sex... from her father.

    5. Re:How do I get a reasonable level of respect? by TwistedPear · · Score: 5, Funny

      I find multiplying the time estimate by Pi gives a more realistic looking number... :)

    6. Re:How do I get a reasonable level of respect? by Jane+Q.+Public · · Score: 4, Insightful

      I used to work for a consulting engineering firm, which "loaned" experts from one office to another depending on what projects an office was working on. But it seemed that the time for completion always expanded. So somebody came up with the (joke) concept of (we'll call it) "corporate time". It worked like this: take the time that the corporation originally estimated you would be out of town for a project. Then switch to the next larger unit of time, and double it. So, for example, if you were scheduled to be out of town for a couple of days, it would turn out to be a month (4 weeks). If a week, it would be 2 months. Etc. This was often surprisingly accurate.

    7. Re:How do I get a reasonable level of respect? by fahrbot-bot · · Score: 4, Funny

      If I manage to stammer a coherent sentence to a hot daughter, it has never resulted in sex...

      Re-watch "Real Genius" and brush up on your banter:

      • Chris Knight: No seriously, listen...if there's ever anything I can do for you, or more to the point, to you, you let me know, okay?
      • Susan Decker: Can you hammer a six inch spike through a board with your penis?
      • Chris Knight: Not right now.
      • Susan Decker: A girl's got to have her standards.
      --
      It must have been something you assimilated. . . .
    8. Re:How do I get a reasonable level of respect? by squizzar · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Reminds me of the rule that 90% of the work takes 90% of the time, the remaining 10% of the work takes the remaining 90% of the time.

  5. Don't avoid it! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Take pride in being the BOFH. Lusers need to be kept in check. Blog about how you've made their lives miserable.

    1. Re:Don't avoid it! by renegadesx · · Score: 3, Insightful

      I personally quit and leave. I moved around form job to job after getting treated like a piece of garbage... and the funny thing is why IT staff never sticks around at those places.

      In the long run they wil lcome to realise that their place is a hostile working environment and managment will force their hand for staff to change their approach.

      Eventually you find a nice one, but if you got the skills, you dont need to put up with that (and if its a small firm you could likely be making more elsewhere)

      --
      Make SELinux enforcing again!
    2. Re:Don't avoid it! by mcvos · · Score: 3, Insightful

      Before quitting and leaving, you might want to tell your boss about the jerks first. Might help to make the message sink in once you do leave.

    3. Re:Don't avoid it! by RogueyWon · · Score: 5, Insightful

      I've seen a couple of IT careers ruined by this attitude. In one case, getting fired was just the start of the guy's problems.

      The BOFH stories are funny. Simon Travaglia writes well and manages to put out clever little satirical stories on a regular basis. He provides an ongoing wry commentary on the state of IT practices in business. He has also, albeit unintentionally, through his cultural influence in the IT world, been the driving force behind more sackings than I care to imagine.

      The point that often gets lost is that his stories are fiction.

      Yes, fiction.

      The unpleasant fact is that in the real world, sysadmins are not generally omnipotent technical gods able to manipulate entire companies at will and escape the consequences of their actions. Nor are management always incompetent drones who will believe anything they're told provided you use big enough words to confuse them. The stereotypes may be comforting, but they're largely not true.

      As I say, I've seen two cases of people getting sacked for directly BOFH-inspired behaviour. One was a guy I shared a house with for a while around 2000 or so, after graduating. He used to regale us with his own "BOFH" stories (though most of them were petty and unfunny). After just over a year, we got home one evening to find he'd been fired. He'd sent out e-mails from his boss's boss's account, designed to promote his own reputation in his company. This had, of course, gotten back to his management chain. My housemate was actually furious because he was convinced that the allegations against him couldn't be "proved". He freely admitted to us he'd done it. But it couldn't be proved, he cried. Honest. The world just wasn't supposed to work this way. He never actually went as far as trying to claim unfair dismissal. I think reality finally managed to penetrate his skull.

      The second guy I saw fired I didn't know so well - rather I saw it at a distance across the organisation where I was working (in 2002). Again, he was a sysadmin (albeit one of several - this is a big organisation). He'd picked up a grudge against a non-technical member of staff and had done the classic BOFH trick of filling their file storage space with naughty pictures then reporting that he'd found them there. In BOFH land, the target would swiftly escorted off the premesis while the BOFH celebrates down at the pub. Of course, in the real world, of course, the victim protested his innocence. The employer follows proper channels and investigates. An external auditor works out exactly what's happened. The sysadmin in question is sacked. And reported to the police. And sued by his intended victim.

      So yes, read the BOFH, enjoy the stories. But don't, for a moment, think they highlight an appropriate way to behave in the real world.

    4. Re:Don't avoid it! by windex82 · · Score: 2, Funny

      Being a BOFH did not cost them their job, being a douche did. The key here is that the subject of both anecdotes are stepping over the line of legality and into the realm of general ass-hatery.

      I'm partly a BOFH, mostly because I can't put up with people who are unable to read simple directions or *gasp* think for two seconds on their own.

      Where would we be if carpenters (office workers) learned how to use their hammer (computer) for only pounding nails (day in, day out routine) and were all too afraid to *try* and use the claw side for removing a nail... ?(anything outside of clicking the handful of icons on the desktop)

  6. Patience! by KenCrandall · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Unfortunately, IT is viewed a lot like the phones by most users. It's "invisible" when it does work, and is only a priority to them when it doesn't work (or they need something!)

    I've found that the best way to make people happy is to effectively communicate with them -- especially when it comes to deadlines. Now I'm not saying to sandbag :-) but if you can over-deliver some things and/or get them done earlier than promised, then you set an expectation of success and partnership with your user base. As difficult as it is, sometimes, you MUST remain non-cranky or bitchy, or you will get stereotyped as the "grumpy IT guy" faster than you can think.

    If it's really burning you out after only 1 1/2 years, then you should really look at (a) your workload (b) your choice of career and (c) your work/life balance.

    1. Re:Patience! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Insightful

      If you want respect you're in the wrong job. Be firm, fair and friendly but don't look for love.
      Be responsive and always close the circle by telling the user what you have done for him.
      Tell people what their priority is and be prepared to negotiate. Remember every time you have to do more validates your free time when things are slack.
      A special request today is business-as-usual tomorrow. You are only as good as your last result.

    2. Re:Patience! by uvajed_ekil · · Score: 2, Insightful
      If it's really burning you out after only 1 1/2 years, then you should really look at (a) your workload (b) your choice of career and (c) your work/life balance.

      These are things to consider, but it may just be a bad company. Usually it seems that folks who don't fit well within a certain company are the types of folks who don't fit well with ANY company, but sometimes it is not them. For example, the HR department at a company a friend worked for was especially inept, and kept hiring unqualified morons who did nothing but start trouble and create a bad atmosphere in the workplace. My friend has worked for two other companies in the same field that were completely tolerable, and I'm sure it was not just him. Maybe it's time to look for a new employer and move on to greener pastures? Giving a good honest effort and trying to be happy only goes so far, and one person should not feel obligated to tolerate or try to fix a company of 60 employees. Basically, say screw them, and go somewhere else.

      --
      This is a hacked account, for which the owner can not be held responsible.
    3. Re:Patience! by SatanicPuppy · · Score: 4, Interesting

      I agree as far as "They treat us like crap when everything is working perfectly." I've been in places where everything worked smoothly, and we were treated like garbage, and I've been in places where nothing worked, and we were treated like kings.

      I don't find that communication helps much, but it may just be my situation. I miss deadlines constantly because I have a job that is (in theory) equal parts deadline-driven code generation, and crisis-driven maintenance and administration. When a crisis pops up, everything gets a little later, and thanks to cutbacks, I'm in charge of way more than 1 person can effectively maintain (5 years ago it was 8 people, now it's me), so there are always fires that need to be put out, and there is very little time for the original code which is technically still part of my job.

      To add insult to injury, about 70% of my work is done remotely, so all the people who work where I happen to have my desk have this mistaken idea that I work for them and that, since they don't have any current problems, I should be working on their code requests.

      I don't know. I'm on the edge of adopting world class BOFHdom in self-defense. Last week I dropped 40 hours (in 2 days) on a site that wasn't even technically mine because their me equivalent was in the hospital in critical condition, and they had had a massive systems crash at the same time.

      The level of sniping and whining and posturing I put up with from the other whiney bitches at my other sites for their ridiculous bullshit problems almost drove me over the edge, despite the worshipful gratitude of the people I was helping.

      --
      ad logicam Claiming a proposition is false because it was presented as the conclusion of a fallacious argument.
    4. Re:Patience! by techno-vampire · · Score: 2, Insightful
      I'm on the edge of adopting world class BOFHdom in self-defense.

      Go for it! And always remember, the most BOFHly thing you can do is give some luser exactly what he asked for, knowing he'll regret it. (e.g., he demands you install a search bar for him, so you give him Bonzai Buddy.)

      --
      Good, inexpensive web hosting
  7. You want the truth? by QuantumG · · Score: 5, Funny

    If something was working yesterday and it isn't working today, you broke it.

    For example, email. Why does email go down? Why? What's so hard about running a mail server? It was working yesterday, I come in this morning, it's not working.. what did you do? Don't say you did nothing, you did. It was working. You stuck your grubby little paws in there and messed with it, didn't you? Fix it.

    You can't handle the truth.

    --
    How we know is more important than what we know.
  8. Fuck em by Spit · · Score: 4, Informative

    You have to options: slap some reality into your users and put them in their place, or burn out. Your choice.

    --
    POKE 36879,8
    1. Re:Fuck em by DNS-and-BIND · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Something I find totally irritating is that a +5 Informative comment can't just stand on its own mountain of awesome, but some geek has to jump in and bask in its reflected glory, pointing out all the things that made the comment awesome (which were already obvious to the casual observer, Sherlock).

      --
      Shutting down free speech with violence isn't fighting fascism. It IS fascism!
    2. Re:Fuck em by GF678 · · Score: 4, Funny

      You have to options: slap some reality into your users and put them in their place, or burn out. Your choice.

      Given your post title is "Fuck em", are you're suggesting I have sex with my users and include some spanking with it, in order to put them in their place as it were?

      I'm not sure our corporate policy covers this particular situation.

  9. Well.. by jessejay356 · · Score: 5, Interesting

    I couldn't do it, I became a programmer and now am one of the annoying people bugging our IT guy.

    1. Re:Well.. by CodeBuster · · Score: 3, Insightful

      Actually programmers tend to be fairly low maintenance for most IT departments. They build and configure their own machines, keep the patches up to date, and generally solve their own computer problems. It is the front desk people who play every flash game around, complete with worms and viruses, on standard issue IE6 and then complain when their computer is "broken" that you have to watch out for.

    2. Re:Well.. by StrategicIrony · · Score: 3, Insightful

      You are in a category of "good programmer"

      It depends on the programming being done. Many of hte programmers I've supported were the ASP .net developers. I can't tell you how many I've had to explain why they can't simply delete DLL files from their system32 folder and can't arbitrarily install ancient versions of SQL without patching them.

      Of course, these are the same people leaving giant SQL injection vulnerabilities in all of their apps (and who have a complete lack of knowledge of encryption), leading to the complete compromise of the credit card database. But that's neither here nor there.

      All I'm saying is that some organizations ONLY have these types of programmers. :-)

    3. Re:Well.. by mjwx · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Actually programmers tend to be fairly low maintenance for most IT departments.

      You misspelled accounting.

      Developers are the biggest bunch of over-coddled, whiny, uncooperative, selfish prats it has ever been my displeasure to provide IT services to. There are notable exceptions in my experience by they are outnumbered 5 to 1 by those developers with a superiority or god complex. They don't understand that you have to help everyone, they think the same rules that apply company wide (yes, even to we sysadmins) don't apply to them, often lack critical technical knowledge, expect you do drop everything for their little problem, constantly demand new equipment that is not required for their jobs, constantly demand that entire systems are changed for their whims (allowing crap through the firewall seems to be a favourite, I had one "senior" developer ask me to open ports 1024 to 10,000 to all IP's once), are never happy even when you do provide them with what they wanted and will complain to management within seconds of being told that their requests are unreasonable or I cant help them at that particular time.

      Accounting on the other hand may have less technical knowledge but they are meticulous to the point of being anal, always take down error messages (one even takes screenshots for me), never install anything strange (most don't even have flash), are always kind and polite and understand that they are not my only priority.

      Especially in recent years when even the most usless developer has been in demand, since the Recession has changed this for many but not for all as some are still looking down on IT services.

      --
      Calling someone a "hater" only means you can not rationally rebut their argument.
    4. Re:Well.. by JWSmythe · · Score: 2, Interesting

          You know, I actually see that a lot (the account references). At my last job, our account guy loved me, because he knew I'd be detailed with anything I did. Explanations started with layman's terms, and went straight through technical. He wanted to know every piece of equipment deployed, so I told him every piece I knew about, with serial numbers. For the mystery machines, we went through his lists item by item, and found the missing machines, or machines that were mis-entered somewhere along the line. Some vendors were careless with serial numbers, and would use some other number on the equipment as the "serial".

          My expense reports included every receipt and line items for everything. I apologized once, because out of something like 40 receipts on a business trip, one for something insignificant got misplaced. I was upset because my records weren't perfect. He was pleased that I wanted them to be right.

          At an older employer, I was on a two month out of country job. I had every receipt, and turned in weekly reports on my spending in both local currency and American dollars. There was a certain level of trust there. Even though I had everything, I was reimbursed directly to my bank account, and handed him my receipt envelope when I returned home. I was making really good money then, so there were a lot of things I didn't report as an expense, like gas for the rental car and meals. I just wanted the high dollar things taken care of (2 months in a hotel, flights, 2 months in a rental car). I took care of business for them, and they took care of me. When I arrived in the country, I had no local currency, so I was handed the equivalent of $500 USD by our local guy. They knew that was less than I'd have as unreported expenses, so no one cared. The folks at the hotel must have thought I was nuts. I bought a small set of plates and silverware, and cooked most of my food in the microwave in the room. Housekeeping was given instructions not to wake me if the DND was on the door, because it was because I was up all night and was exhausted. Every time they came in, they found my dishes washed and drying by the bathroom sink, and my mostly organized desk. All they had to do was give me clean sheets and towels every few days. I was the perfect hotel guest. :)

      --
      Serious? Seriousness is well above my pay grade.
  10. Teach them! by xous · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Hi,

    You need to to develop policies for handling requests and have your manager back them. You also need to make sure the employees know about these policies and understand them. You might want to see if your manager will sponsor a QA half-day with some free food so you and your users can get to know each other and understand their requirements and what you can and can't do for them.

    If employee's aren't complying with these policies politely explain it to them and CC it to their manager. If they do it again reference the original email and explain the problem to the manager and remind them that you have reported this kind of activity before.

    If someone asks you to skip then ahead in the queue or go against company ask them to submit the request in writing to your manager.

    If you streamline the process that fits your policies and make sure they see that following the rules is faster they will be more inclined to do it.

    If you can't get your manager to back you on this your SOL and should be looking for a new job.

    There is a difference between being a BOFH and following company policy.

    These changes will not make them respect you as these people are likely assholes to begin with and should be treated as such. I don't do favors for people that can't be bothered to show a little common courtesy and they don't end up very high on my TODO list.

    1. Re:Teach them! by binaryspiral · · Score: 3, Insightful

      I agree - establish a process. It may seem counter productive - but if the grunts can come and pull you off a project, then something is broken.

      Establish a ticketing system - Request Tracker comes to mind. If someone is having a problem, send it to the "help desk" instead of interrupting you from completing your tasks. This gives you the opportunity to do a few things:

      1. Prioritize your workload. - The spam message the receptionist got last week and decided to mention today isn't worth interrupting your server build to review.

      2. Display your queue at any given time to everyone so expectations can be honestly set. - Three servers are behind on patches, email storage is critical, and your database server has some issue with backups causing the transaction logs to fill. Yes, I know your DVD drive is broken - it's on my list, see?

      3. Document a history of problem systems, processes, or people. - The web server is in serious need of retirement. Every time sales sends out their monthly newsletter, the traffic spikes cause a huge queue in storage and runs out of memory. And, yes, the CEO calls me directly every Monday when his Blackberry radio is automatically disabled because he let his battery die - and can't remember how to turn it on.

      Document, track, and justify getting some help keeping the office humming.
       

    2. Re:Teach them! by Exception+Duck · · Score: 3, Informative

      employees know about these policies and understand them...so you and your users can get to know each other and understand...
      make them respect you

      And if that doesn't works, try crying.

    3. Re:Teach them! by scamper_22 · · Score: 3, Interesting

      Make your workload visible!

      I guarantee you, whatever workload you think is causing you to burn out, the software developers are under the same workload.

      1. Get yourself an issue tracking system. Since you're the lone IT guy... you don't need anything complex, but get something... preferably web based.

      2. Make the wait queue public. So people can see how much work you have to do. They also know how long to wait for things.

      3. Let this run for a few weeks, and if you feel you could use a second set of hands, you now have the data to take to your manager. Get a coop student, get another IT person...

      I say this as a software engineer. I now insist on everything being tracked on an issue tracking system. Nothing is worse than random people asking you to do work and no one realizes how much it all adds up to. I don't be an ass about it, but I do insist everything be tracked. If I have to, I submit the issue myself and assign it to myself.

      Do this and people will come to understand.

      Now then... you naturally understand that software engineers are generally reasonably computer savvy people. Nothing would frustrate them more than knowing they *could* fix a problem if only they had the rights or passwords to do so. You are lucky you are in a small company. You can bypass 'official' policies once in a while. If you can't handle the workload, maybe see if there are software developers you trust that can handle certain things. Maybe expose some scripts you run...

    4. Re:Teach them! by JWSmythe · · Score: 5, Interesting

          The last place I was at, I was driven absolutely nuts with incomplete trouble tickets by people who had no clue what they wanted.

          "I want an FTP account for a user in [city]."

          So I'd reply, give me a hint of which server, what username, what password, and why you're requesting this. Each server had dozens of machines.

          I had written up a very clear and concise list of what was expected in a ticket. That was overridden by middle management as unnecessary.

          "Can you search the Apache logs for [customer]?" That would be a customer who had a presence in several cities, and each one had several sites. No hint of what was being searched for, the date(s) to search, what server, what city, or anything more than the customer.

          And my favorite. "We need this project documented. You have 2 weeks.". That's it, no more real explanation. I'd never worked on the project. Had been categorically excluded from the project. Was not allowed to know anything about the project, and suddenly I was to recreate the project (document building each and every custom app from source), which the steps weren't documented and only vague ideas were given about any of it. I asked for information. I begged for information. I was told "This has to be done or the company won't be paid for the project." One week went by and finally information started trickling in. The last day of week 2, I had everything I needed (at like 5pm on Friday). I wrote up a 20 page document, included both sources and compiled versions, with an explanation of how things worked to the best of my understanding. I made ISO images, and put them on an internal server so the requestor could get them either that night, or Monday morning.

          "What were you thinking? Why would you make ISOs. I wanted it exactly as we'd ship to the customer." Ahhh, well beyond spec, but reading minds was part of the job, right? I can read minds, and theirs are drawing a blank most days.

          So I burnt the CD's, printed the document, put it in a FedEx envelope with a bogus shipping label, and put it in the managers chair, like it had just come in. He sat on it for two more weeks before handing it off to someone else in house to "test". A month later, he hadn't finished testing. Another week later I was told "You didn't include instructions on ...." No shit, I didn't know anything about ..... No one told me about ..... You're only coming to me now to tell me ..... exists. Why wasn't I told about this when I started, so I could complete your request. The truth? Because they don't know what they want, what any other middle manager has had someone do, or even what other departments are doing. Countless meetings all day long, and no one has a clue.

          Am I ranting?

      --
      Serious? Seriousness is well above my pay grade.
    5. Re:Teach them! by JWSmythe · · Score: 2, Interesting

          My insulation came in the form of paper trails. Most of his requests were verbal. All of my requests were via email, which I stored copies on my personal laptop. Daily "I need more information" emails, and daily verbal "I'll get it for you later" responses.

          I was being set up. I knew it from the first day I was handed that. Shit hit the fan, and I had a magic shield protecting me from the splatter. Actually, when I was completed and it was refused because it wasn't on CD's with a printed manual, I spelled out that I had a paper trail, and I wasn't going to take the fall for his incompetence.

          They found another excuse to can me a few weeks later. I was sick. Home, with a fever and a migraine where I couldn't see straight, I notified them a few minutes late. I was handed my walking papers that Friday. I left with a big smile on my face, which drove him absolutely nuts. :) I wanted an excuse to get busy on my own business, that would actually be run by professionals (myself and an excellent trained and practiced corporate officer). I know IT. He knows business. He won't question my IT decisions, and I don't question his business decisions.
         

      --
      Serious? Seriousness is well above my pay grade.
  11. You don't ... by MartinSchou · · Score: 4, Insightful

    They treat you like crap because they can get away with it - that simple.

    If the general behavior around your office is as you say, start keeping a clipboard with their project requests on it. They want something done, they get put on the list, and make sure they see that they're on the bottom of that list. Add a column to indicate estimated time required.

    Essentially they're treating you like the janitor. They think everything's as simple as unclogging the toilet or getting more toilet paper. And your attitude seems to reinforce their perception of this.

    You seem to show them that your time is worthless and that your job could be done by a trained monkey - why would you expect them to treat you differently?

    1. Re:You don't ... by phoebe · · Score: 4, Insightful

      Essentially they're treating you like the janitor. They think everything's as simple as unclogging the toilet or getting more toilet paper. And your attitude seems to reinforce their perception of this.

      You seem to show them that your time is worthless and that your job could be done by a trained monkey - why would you expect them to treat you differently?

      Being an IT person is being a computer janitor. If you are doing the job properly you are simply unclogging the tubes or restocking printer paper. Every machine should be imaged and locked down with something like Microsoft SteadyState, when a user has a problem it's either a reboot, re-image, or a hardware replacement.

      The problem might stem from merging IS and IT jobs into the same position with no distinction being made. IS projects should be handled in a more formal manner than re-stocking a printer but because defining such an interaction is widely open to interpretation it has been taken to the users advantage. You need to take ownership of that interaction and make it clear the difference between such projects and cleaning the tubes.

    2. Re:You don't ... by kombipom · · Score: 3, Insightful

      It's this attitude that really pisses off technical users. Not everyone in a company can work with a locked down PC with nothing but bloody Office(TM) on it. Some of us do more that write letters and powerpoint presentations. And no, I don't know what software I'm going to need for the lifetime of my PC when it's supplied, and I can't afford to wait 3 weeks to get each piece of software I want to install approved because it's not on your list. If I install something and it doesn't work you have every right to say "Not an approved app I can't do anything" but don't stop me from spending 5 mins of company time downloading and installing a free app to save a crapload of paperwork (and work for the IT department). If I install unlicensed software sack me, if I bring the network to it's knees name and shame me but don't cut me off at the knees so that your job is easier.

  12. There are many hats... by bol · · Score: 5, Insightful

    In technology there are a lot of roles, software developers, system administrators, network administrators, project managers with technology backgrounds, etc etc etc. You sound like you might be "your company's computer guy" also known as a workstation administrator. There are as many varied roles in the workplace as there are people. Make sure not to lump it all together.

    In any career there are hurdles and IT is no exception. It's important to see the path ahead of you as difficult as it may be. Most people enter into IT with a passion for computers and technology. They want to learn more, they want to be able to build bigger and better infrastructure and to knock down all obstacles in their way. You need to find your niche. Some people are software development gurus and some people understand the intricate details that bind systems together. Do you spent your evenings learning new technology and figuring out the latest and greatest?

    Try not to take things personally with dealing with others. It's important not to consider anybody just a "user." You have customers. Your customers want service and it's your job to provide that service to them. Most people in IT are very standoffish, anti-social and overly opinionated. It takes awhile to adapt and adjust to actually interfacing with people. The most important attribute of any employee is communication and nobody succeeds in a vacuum. Treat your customers well and you'll get respect in return. Itâ(TM)s fine to have a preference and its fine to have opinions. Just make sure you temper them with objective thinking, facts, and (at least) the appearance of an open mind.

    If this is your first IT role you may want to consider why you got into it in the first place. What's your goal? How do you see your future? I've been a system administrator for over 10 years and have made the transition to being a system architect. My goal is to design infrastructure for the biggest installations on the planet. What's yours?

  13. Here's what you do by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Get support from your Boss and Boss's boss for this, but:

    1) Everything goes in a MS Project file. Large projects get their own file, and roll it up into the big one. Items are done FIFO.

    2) The only thing which takes precedence are emergencies - and only if the thing is DEAD, on fire, or totally down. No pseudo-emergencies because this customer of the company is contributing $20 Million in sales this year (if that's the case, then get another body).

    3) PUBLISH the project file - read only. Everyone knows what's in your pipeline, what you're working on. So long as you hit your targets, people will tend to leave you alone and get on the list. If you don't hit your targets, then they'll treat the thing as the bullshit that it is.

    4) If you have two projects that come in at the same time, ask your boss to prioritize.

    5) Make your boss and your boss' boss look good. Keep them appraised of situations that could do otherwise.

    6) Don't fall prey to bimbos who hang their tits in your face, or people who bring you food. Stick to your project plan.

    Eventually - you'll get help, and you'll be the Team Lead/Manager because YOU'RE the guy who created the project plan methodology that works. You may get picked to do the same to other departments... After you do a few of those, someone's going to ask you to be a real manager and you might have to get an MBA - get the company to pay for it....

    And yeah, I know WTF I'm talking about - I'm living proof that this works...

  14. Carrot and stick approach by syousef · · Score: 3, Informative

    When they're nice to you, make an effort to fix their problem as quickly and offer suggestions. Be friendly and personable.

    When they're not nice to you, everything takes twice as long. Get everything in writing. Do it all formally. REMAIN professional. Acting like a child will only make your own life stressful and miserable and ultimately get you fired.

    Now there are exceptions. Anyone in a sufficiently high position is going to be able to have you fired if they think you're stalling. So do tread carefully.

    The above advice might SEEM unprofessional - not always doing your best - but in the long run you're doing the business a favour. You'll be surprised how much more respect you get once your users learn that giving respects gets them the result they wanted. At which point everything runs more efficiently.

    You'll never get anywhere in business by being seen as a doormat.

    --
    These posts express my own personal views, not those of my employer
    1. Re:Carrot and stick approach by Mr.+Freeman · · Score: 4, Insightful

      Intentional slowdowns while remaining professional? This is impossible as being professional means you aren't going to slow down your work because someone wasn't nice to you. Your post is more "be mean to the people that treat you mean, unless they can fire you". Which is just code for "Be an asshole to people you don't like".

      If you're being professional, you shouldn't have to worry about who can have you fired.

      --
      -1 disagree is not a modifier for a reason. -1 troll, flaimbait, redundant, overrated are NOT acceptable substitutes.
    2. Re:Carrot and stick approach by Aceticon · · Score: 4, Insightful

      First one point:
      - There are many people out there which will intentionally be rude, aggressive and obnoxious towards others as a way to obtain speedier service - they are usually in management and sales. This disrupts the normal work flow of the company, causing negative side-effects (which are mostly felt by other than the rude ones) which are larger in size than the positive outcomes they themselves get from this behavior. The overall count is that it's good for them but bad for the company.
      - Any discussion about how to counteract said behavior must take in account that you are trying to eliminate an individual behavior which has an overall negative effect on the company's efficiency and thus it's bottom line. As such, the range of actions your can take while still being "professional" is a lot larger than "if you're just doing it because you're pissed-off".
      - More generally, office politics ARE part of everybody's work spec (even if not a written part) so you better learn how to deal with it instead of cowering behind the "if I do not behave as a cold logical robot with no concern for my well being and future in this company then I'm being unprofessional" theory.

      That said, arbitrary slowing down you work (as in: you're free now but you just throw it into your in-tray and wait 2h) would be unprofessional.

      However, weighting in the behavior of the person having the problem when prioritizing your work is also professional, simply because the rude and aggressive types also tend to be the less cooperative when it comes to solving their problems - the exact same problem can be sorted out much faster when the other side cooperates.

      It's the long term approach to making your job efficient: for any two problems which would otherwise have equal priority, you solve the faster to solve first then the other one - so you fix what is more important to fix and in overall your response is faster, which saves the company money. That it happens that the uncooperative people (which usually are the rude and obnoxious ones) also cause that, by nature of their own uncooperative behavior, their problems are slower to solve, it's only a problem of them, not you.

      To remain utterly professional, you must do your best to distinguish between the truly uncooperative types and the cooperative but momentarily really stressed types: those with a long history of rudeness and obnoxious behavior can be safely tagged as uncooperative, for the other ones, it's actually a good idea to be extra calm and considerate - if a usually polite person is having so much problems that they're stressed out it's probably a good idea to pay extra attention to their problems.

  15. Structure your business more effectively. by nailbu · · Score: 2, Insightful

    This is a business level issue, not one specifically with your job.

    I believe your best option would be to talk to your management about putting processes in place to allow you to more effectively handle your work load and communicate with the rest of the people in the office.

    If the staff in the business have proper expectations set regarding how your function within the business is performed, by having procedures for both parties to follow, they'll then have to take up their issues with management, not you, as I would think should normally be the case.

  16. Remember... by Toonol · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Remember the other side of the equation. Users who have to sit for days doing nothing because their user accounts aren't set up right. Ridiculous security policies like being forced to change your password every month. Network configuration changes that break sofware they've been using for years. Pointless upgrades that add bloat and remove features.

    It's tough being a user, seemingly toyed with by the IT guys.

    1. Re:Remember... by Opportunist · · Score: 4, Interesting

      That's why I turned to telling the users in advance what's in for them. Often they even get to "vote" if a certain update should be done.

      People want to have the feeling their opinion is valuable. Sure, I eventually get what I want, but they think they've "influenced" my decision when it's actually the other way around. It helps if you tell them what they need to know to make the choice that you already did. They're much more willing to support your choice if they think it was theirs.

      Yes, that's not nice and that's not really user friendly. But it gets the job done and keeps the users happy.

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
    2. Re:Remember... by Opportunist · · Score: 3, Insightful

      Perception is everything, actually.

      An example. Imagine you're going to the movies and you bought a ticket for 10 bucks. You arrive there and you notice you forgot your ticket, and no time to go back and get it. Buy another one for another 10 bucks? Hell no! You turn around, angry, and go home.

      Now let's change that scenario a little. You go to the theater and as you reach into your wallet to take out the ticket, a 10 dollar bill gets pulled out as well and descends into the open manhole right next to you. You might think "fuck" for the moment, then shrug it off and go to enjoy the movie, probably you have forgotten about it before the movie even starts.

      The net result is the same, you're down 10 bucks. But one is your own "stupidity", the other a freak accident that "just happens".

      People don't like bad surprises, and more important, they don't like feeling stupid. If you don't tell them that the 'net is down and they are trying for half an hour before someone casually tells them "oh yeah, they took the network down, I called Bob and he told me", they are pissed. First, they feel stupid for trying and failing, then they feel stupid for not simply calling you and finally they are pissed at you for not telling them beforehand.

      A coworker told me to tell them as little as possible, to keep them from thinking we don't know our job because our system "might" break down every other day. My policy is the other way around. Yes, I cry wolf a lot of times. 9 out of 10 times, the warning can safely be ignored (those are the 9 times where I say "shouldn't have some impact, but just might..."). But it serves some valuable purposes. First and foremost, my coworkers (and my boss, who is likewise quite computer illiterate) see that I do some work, I'm not just sitting in my ivory tower office surfing for porn all day. Second, they feel informed and they feel they are in control of things because I do offer rescheduling if it collides with someone's important project (it's no biggie to do an update an hour later if someone has a deadline DAMN JUST NOW). And finally, they feel that I "feel their pain", that I don't just push updates randomly, to maximize the annoyance, but that those updates serve them, not me.

      Of course, it depends on the kind of person you're dealing with. In my experience, you have to deal with a few kinds of people:

      First, the computer interested person. He does know a bit about IT, and he feels appreciated and taken serious if you hand him information. We have one of this kind, and he was considered "difficult" because he got quite pissed with the disinformation policy that existed before I came. He's quite happy that I'm in charge now, he feels informed, he feels his concerns are taken serious, he feels his input is appreciated instead of considered a "pest". You can easily win these people over by simply telling what you're doing.

      Then there's the opposite, the "don't wanna know, just wanna work" person. He doesn't care what's in his machine, he learned to push these buttons in that order to do what he wants, and he's happy with it. With him, your goal is to keep everything as it is and reassure him that the update will not change anything for him. Keep him in his steady state universe and he's happy.

      Then there's the panic guy. He goes ballistic every time something "breaks" unexpectedly. They mellow out a fair lot when they know in advance that something might break. And they are very happy every time you give a warning and then nothing bad happens. With them, just warning of possible hicckups in the system makes your life a lot easier.

      People want to be informed. And people talk with each other. Gossip is almost mandatory in my company, and groupthink plays a huge role. You have to win over the loudmouths and your life will be a lot easier, simply because they will keep telling everyone how perfectly you handle all the disasters your predecessors couldn't, even if you're doing essentially the same quality of work they did.

      All because they get to see it a lot differently.

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
  17. Re:Move to a different company by Dare+nMc · · Score: 5, Interesting

    worked in my case. IE when I switched companies a year ago, the people who had respect for me before, knew enough about PC's they still got by. Those without respect got to deal with your more typical corporate IT guy (not a total bastard, but at times). The guy who disliked me the most (actually accused me of sabotaging his win 95 box from the network, to our boss, just 18 months ago) publicly wished me back.

  18. Where's your ticket? by moxitek · · Score: 3, Insightful

    After doing this type of work for a while, I've found that the best way to keep my sanity while keeping users happy was to implement rigorous policy regarding how and when users ask for help. It sounds like your outfit may be too small to have a dedicated "helpdesk" or front line support, but I would suggest at least setting up a helpdesk system or Sharepoint portal that is self service to allow users to send in issues.

    This allows you to maintain visiblity into your workload, so you can show why something isn't getting done after the fifth time Joe User asks the status, plus is an easy sell to your management with the argument that it allows you to effectively prioritize without users in your face all day asking why such and such isn't done or that this or that is the most important thing in the world at the moment.

    The best thing about a policy like this is that you can easily deflect to people that are rude or in your face. "Did you put in a ticket?" "Sorry, I'm super busy and I can't effectively prioritize this request until you submit it." "Oh, your an asshole and want to know the status every five minutes? Check the portal." Getting enforcment on this is your biggest battle. If you can't win that, then take your experience, dedication and hard work and start shopping around. There's no reason to be burnt out because of the user population if you can help it.

  19. Can't get no respect! by zugmeister · · Score: 5, Insightful

    One thing to keep in mind is that in their eyes you are on par with the plumber. Nobody really wants to call the plumber or have him around, OTOH you really need one when the fecal matter hits the rotary air impeller. When they give you attitude they are probably angry / frustrated at their machine / server / the situation and not necessarily you specifically. If they're being really uptight when you walk in the door remind them that you've had the last 15 seconds to fix it and you're on their side.
    Depending on the political situation you may be able to interject something into a company meeting explaining what's going on and get people to consider your side.
    All in all, remember to keep calm and be sure this is really the right thing for you to be doing. Maybe it's time for you to make a change?

    1. Re:Can't get no respect! by Opportunist · · Score: 4, Interesting

      Could someone drop a few insightful mods on that guy? It's straight to the point.

      You're essentially a repairman. Nobody wants to deal with one until whatever he can fix breaks down. And when it breaks down, people are usually anything but happy about it. Especially in today's offices, they can't do jack without their computers, so they're under heavy pressure when they call you: They can't work!

      So they stand there, getting angrier by the minute because their deadlines aren't going to be pushed back just because that computer doesn't work. They maybe don't even blame it on you. But you're there and they're angry.

      Once the machine works again, you've become obsolete. They don't need you anymore. But they need to catch up because they lost time.

      I admire people who work in helpdesk, and I make sure they feel acknowledged and thanked when they fix a problem for me. I know well that they don't get that a lot, but they'd sure need it to balance out the abuse they have to deal with.

      --
      We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
  20. Talk to your manager. by subreality · · Score: 3, Insightful

    Have a frank discussion with your manager. Explain what your problems are. If he has a spine at all, he'll set reasonable expectations of you, and stand up to other managers who're complaining, thus isolating you from this BS and letting you do your job.

    If you don't have a manager who can do this, you need to talk to the higher-ups about remedying this situation (which should be doable in a company that size), by either moving you under a competent manager, hiring one, and optionally firing the nonmanager who you currently report to. If that problem can't be fixed, you will soon have to choose between your sanity and your job. Protip: Choose sanity.

    You also obviously need more people. If there are legitimate projects that are waiting because they're low priority in your deep stack, then it's a pretty easy case to make. I've been a single IT guy in a 60 person software company, and it's simply not sustainable long-term.

  21. Re:Huh? by PitaBred · · Score: 4, Informative

    Software developers rarely manage their own machines. And that's not necessarily a bad thing... I got my degree in Computer Science. Great people to solve a hairy logic problem, not someone you'd want with admin access on any machine you have to support...

  22. Re:Huh? by z0idberg · · Score: 3, Funny

    middle management.

  23. Be honest. Are you the problem? by dmomo · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Be professional
    Be confident in your expertise
    Don't over explain the issue if there's no need to
    Don't talk down to them
    Don't assume just because they don't know how to fix something that they are lazy or stupid
    Don't play that "give them exactly what they asked for to the letter". Be a human.
    If you honestly have too much work, let it be known to your managers. Make sure your not slacking off if you do this.
    Shower

    If you do all of these things and they are still "unappreciative"

    1) Are you sure it's not you? Are you warranting it? Or, are you being over sensitive.

    2) Maybe you work for a shitty group of people. Most places I've worked, our IT people have gotten respect. I've seen a few who didn't, and honestly, I think it was their condescending attitude and/or blame delagation that made others combative.

    3) Find a new field of work. Maybe this isn't what you're cut out for. Employees are your customers and you have issues with them. Get out of the service industry.

  24. Re:I Set Expectations by Opportunist · · Score: 3, Interesting

    A techie respecting a manager? Respecting someone who thinks a tie is a sign of civilisation, who thinks a blackberry is the pinnacle of technology? Gimme a break. :)

    I've been in both positions. And I slowly get to see just why it was so hard as a "techie" to respect managers, now that I'm turned into one: The mindset and goals are vastly different.

    I don't strive for a perfect solution anymore. A solution that works... no, not even that. I'm looking for a solution that doesn't break the budget, that I can "sell" to my higher ups without having to tear down walls of resistance (yes, that means "Windows good - big successful company behind it that has been in biz for years", "Linux bad - No company behind it, smells like some geek toy project"), that looks like it could get the job done and that can be administered without having to hire additional people.

    Yes, I hate myself too, why're you asking?

    --
    We used to have a Bill of Rights. Now, with the rights gone, all we have left is the bill.
  25. unpopular answer by nine-times · · Score: 4, Insightful

    I have an answer that's probably not going to be too popular around these parts, but I'm going to give it anyway: Learn to be political.

    There's not a particular technique or trick. You're going to have to learn about the culture of the company you are, and observe who is getting treated decently and getting respect. Get in with one or more of those people, and that connection will help you. Learn what the "popular kids" have in common and make it your own. Experiment and learn how to complain productively, how to get what you want, how to persuade those who disagree with you, and how to defend yourself against attacks. It's strategy. It's war. It's the way of the weasel.

    Now I'm not advocating that you actually lie, cheat, or do a bad job. Just understand that success takes more than doing a good job. Political savvy is a valid skill of its own.

    1. Re:unpopular answer by ghostdoc · · Score: 3, Informative

      Agree with the above (where's my mod points?) All offices are political environments and being a geek in that environment can be hard. If you really can't hack it, then buy some protection: make friends with the Queen Bee (every office has one, usually the CEO's PA) and get her on your side to watch your back for you.

      I'd also add:

      Maintain a list of tasks that you have to do. When someone asks you to do something, add it to the bottom of the list. If they insist on a deadline, ask them what other tasks on the list will need to be delayed/cancelled in order to make that deadline. Do it politely and professionally and don't let them get away with 'whatever'.

      --
      Business/App ideas are like arseholes: everyone's got one, they're mostly shit, but very rarely they contain a diamond
  26. I did IT for a software company by Alpha830RulZ · · Score: 2, Insightful

    It sucked. Software developers think they understand information systems and network admin better than you do, and they really don't. They're (hopefully) smart, well paid, probably arrogant, and often actually can do your job. That is, if they could be bothered with the administrivia that is necessary to do IT right, which they can't.

    You won't get respect easily at a SW company in IT. If you aren't generally first tier skillz, hyper productive, and fun to be around, your life is just going to suck.

    I would seek work at a non SW company. Non computer folk are much more appreciative.

    --
    I was taught to respect my elders. The trouble is, it's getting harder and harder to find some.
    1. Re:I did IT for a software company by jonaskoelker · · Score: 2, Insightful

      I would seek work at a non SW company. Non[-]computer folk are much more appreciative.

      I would venture a guess here, but first my background (so you can flame it to death :D): I'm a CS/crypto student, having interned as a developer, shared office with the local sysadmin, but never sysadmin'ed myself.

      Computer folk (well duh) understand computer better. That means you can probably writer terser documentation. It also means they understand the difference between understanding networking and knowing the local network topology.

      If they have just a tiny bit of humility, they'll accept that even though they could fix their computer problems if they had all the IT knowledge, it's more efficient for IT to spend on it so they can get back to coding.

      They probably also understand that it's a non-trivial job, and even though they can install Apache on their home box and play with it they don't know what it really takes to run a corporate website.

      They'll probably also do stupid things less often, so you can spend less time removing malware, changing wallpaper settings for them (there's a true story close to this...), etc.

      You won't get a standing ovation for power cycling the printer. But on the other hand, you also won't get "Why did you break the printer?!? I'm on a deadline, you inconsiderate clod!!"

      Completely unrelated: how do doctors with different specializations feel when they treat each other?

  27. Don't do what I did! by deets101 · · Score: 5, Funny

    I found solace in drugs, booze and hookers. This worked out great for a while. After some time (about 10 hours) it started affecting my job and personal life. I have since been fired from job, so the stress is gone. The bad thing is that now I am addicted to drugs and it burns when I piss. Oh yeah, my left me and took our kids to her mothers.

    --
    My parents went to slashdot and all I got was this lousy sig!

    --

    --
    My parents went to Slashdot and all I got was this lousy sig.
  28. White Board by Ozoner · · Score: 5, Interesting

    Here's what I did in that situation:

    I put up a large white-board, and each time someone requested a job, I wrote it on a strip and put it at the bottom of the list.

    When they complained about the delay, I pointed to the white-board and suggested that they negotiate with those above them for priority.

    It worked well.........

    1. Re:White Board by daffmeister · · Score: 3, Informative

      Agreed. The whiteboard is a great idea but any visible trouble-ticket queue would work. I'm guessing that the problem is that each person views you as their sole resource. They need to see that they are one of many. A formal trouble-ticket system goes a long way to alleviating that.

      The other option (although you might be too small a group for this) is that all requests go through your manager. I've managed IT teams and when all requests have to go through me then I can be the bastard and the guys doing the actual work can be nice. If they need to bounce something they can just refer the trouble-maker to me.

      The key is to put something - a system or a person - between the requests coming in and the effort going out.

  29. Tit For Tat by rainmaestro · · Score: 2, Interesting

    I'm in a similar position. Sole IT guys for a 70-ish person company (mostly engineers), though I have access to additional techs when something major breaks.

    I've only been there a short time, but it has already become obvious to most employees that the nice guys get their requests finished sooner. The ones who ask, not demand, and show basic friendliness ("Please" and "Thank You" go a long way) get top priority from me. I'll do a two-day task for them before a 5-minute job for one of the "other guys" (they aren't exactly rude, but have that condescending nature that so many engineer-types fall into even when discussing something they know nothing about).

    Engineers are temperamental at best, and often are at that level of tech competency to be dangerous. The ones who recognize when they are in over their head this can be great, as they give fantastic trouble reports. Those that don't just muck things up even worse.

    Now, I've seen this same pattern since high school (scrawny white nerd at a magnet program located in the middle of the ghetto). Geeky types are picked on because they let themselves be picked on. IT guys get no respect because they allow themselves to be made into peons.

    If you really want their respect, here's my suggestion:
    ***Confront them***
    A lot of the time, jerks don't really understand how they are coming off. If you discuss it with them, it can help. Don't be sheepish, don't get angry, yell, make ad hominem attacks, etc. Stand up straight, look them in the eyes, and explain your issue *as* *an* *equal*.

    Having said that, some guys are just assholes. They know it, and they don't really care. In those cases, the best you can do it avoid them as much as possible. Some people can't be won over. You catch more flies with honey, but some flies are best caught with a flyswatter.

    And remember the advice of the immortal Scotty: always pad your time estimates by a factor of 3 if you want to look like a miracle worker.

  30. Re:Huh? by TheBig1 · · Score: 2, Insightful

    IT != Software Development.

  31. Re:Huh? by JWSmythe · · Score: 3, Funny

        What happens when "middle management" applies to everyone from the CEO down to the managers?

        Don't answer that. It was sarcastic. They'd fire me for it, but I was already fired. Now I have all the time in the world to work on my BOFH-isms. :)

        "Hello BSA? What's the payout on an anonymous tip these days?"

        "Hello DHS? What's the payout on an anonymous tip these days?"

        "Hello IRS? What's the payout on an anonymous tip these days?"

        "Hello FTC? What's the payout on an anonymous tip these days?"

        Ahhh, we see a running trend. And one previous employer was worried about direct retaliation, either through DoS attacks, or a sniper posted within a mile of their front door (the sniper being me). I had more fun doing absolutely NOTHING to them. They were so worried about what I *could* do that they drove themselves nuts looking for my back doors, monitoring for my attacks, and watching for me behind every corner. I didn't even know this first hand. Word got back to me from other people over the years. :)

        And for the record, I don't believe in back doors, because they could be a security hole while I'm there. A DoS attack just isn't worth my time. They'll always screw something up on their own, I don't have to help it along in the least. I don't believe in jail time either, so physical violence is out unless they provoke it. (i.e., show up to my house with a gun drawn, and see how long you last.)

        Sometimes the best revenge is to do absolutely nothing at all. It'll leave them wondering what I'll do for years to come. :)

    --
    Serious? Seriousness is well above my pay grade.
  32. Re:Huh? by sanosuke001 · · Score: 3, Insightful

    I went to school for CS and while I was in school, I had a student sys admin job in one of the colleges on campus. Once in a while I'd run into some odd problem but most of it was easy. Now, the really tough jobs are the ones I come up with on my own computer.

    You're right, anyone who actually knows anything about computers will only have problems that make no sense at all. Ignorant users are easy, savvy users are a nightmare....

    --
    -SaNo
  33. Two-way street by Kirby · · Score: 5, Insightful

    The same way anyone else gets respect. Actually get to know your coworkers, make sure that they know you understand their concerns and needs (and it helps if it's true), be someone who isn't just the weird guy in the server room that nobody ever talks to.

    Don't consider getting to know your coworkers to be 'politics'. That's an anti-pattern.

    It's not a cure-all, but if at least some people start thinking of you as a human with a name, and actually trust you, it helps a lot.

    And also, return the favor. They're not just users violating policies and expecting miracles - they're stressed out people with demanding jobs that need support. If you don't respect them, it's _blindingly obvious_ and they will respond in kind.

    Not everyone's personality is suited to this approach, but a little bit of empathy goes a long ways.

    --
    -- Kate
  34. Also by Sycraft-fu · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Don't say no. Seriously, don't tell users "No you can't do that, no you can't have that." Instead, explain to them what they have to do and/or what has to happen for them to get it.

    For example suppose a user wants admin on their desktop and it is against company policy. Tell them it is against policy, and ask them if you can help them with what they need. If they say "I don't want your help, I want admin," then tell them "Well ok, but to do that you'll have to get a policy exception, here's the process for doing that." Now the process may be "Ask the big boss who is going to say no," that's fine. Just let them know what they need to do to get what they want. If it is something they can't or won't do, well then no problem. If they can, well then also no problem.

    The reason is it makes you not the bad guy. You aren't telling them "No this is impossible," which they figure is bullshit, you are telling them "This is possibly, but only if preconditions are met." It really does make a difference. Also makes a difference if you have to defend yourself to someone higher up. If you said no, maybe the higher up gets you in trouble for that. If you said "Here's what you have to do," and the person didn't do it, when you explain that to the higher up they'll more likely ask the person "Why didn't you do what he said?"

    Also you never know, even if you think the conditions won't be met, maybe they are. Maybe it was more possible than you thought. Like say a user says "I need 50TB of storage on the central NAS." There's not that kind of space, you've got 10GB per user and that's all. Well you go and find out what it would cost to add 50TB to it. Say with the disks, shelf, backup tapes and drives and such it is $200,000. You then tell them "Ok to get that you'll need to get a requisition for $200,000 for us to buy the necessary hardware." Week later they show up with all the necessary stuff. Turns out their project is real important and the funds are there for stuff like that, even though you didn't think so.

    This falls in with the same sort of thing the GP talked about like skipping them to the top. Whatever the process is for that, tell them what they have to do. "Ok we can do that, however for that exception to be made a vice president or higher needs to send a written request to the IT manager. Once he has it, he'll have me move you to the top." Or whatever is applicable to your company. It makes you not the asshole, covers your ass and so on.

    Now this doesn't deal with all cases. Some people are just pricks and will always be so, they figure you have to jump at their every word. However many people are just stressed and taking it out on you. If you show them that you are willing to work with them, that can really help. It makes a big psychological difference to many people when they feel like they are empowered and they have control. When you tell them "Yes, but..." followed with the things they need to do, it is back on them, they are in control. When you tell them "No," you are being a jerk and taking control from their perspective.

    1. Re:Also by Sobrique · · Score: 3, Insightful

      No. The answer is to give a realistic perspective on what's possible and what's not. In IT almost anything is _possible_ it's just some stuff is infeasibly expensive, or overly time consuming. That's the major reason why not every user gets admin rights - because the time and effort involved in keeping everything shiny increases greatly in that situation. Or why not every user gets the 500Tb of storage they think they deserve. But none the less, it's not _impossible_ to do these things - it just requires more resources.
      By pointing out that that's the limiting factor in their request, you're left being a reasonable 'not-bofh', they leave content - because it's not your fault that they cannot have a shinything - and sometimes you do actually get the new resources you said you needed, when it's important enough. We work on a charging basis for storage - we assume a certain amount per user, and charge (their department) above and beyond that. We therefore don't end up in cockslapping matches with the user, we let them (and their manager) decide how important it is to them to have more disk storage than everyone else - and if it's important enough for them to cover our additional cost in installing, owning, running it, then... well, why should we care?

  35. Re:Huh? by spydabyte · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Sadly, this is the common misconception most people had. Returning to work at Cisco my father made a reference to my IT job. I had to explain that even though, as a company, Cisco makes IT solutions that does not mean my job title is IT nor that we're an IT company. Fortunately though, this matters little to most people not in "the field", even if he is the manager of a non-profit's entire IT staff (1 person, like the author of this post).

    But back to the author's question-- Stay clear headed, remember that it's just a job. If it's not enough for you (you're too passionate) then find something better, after waiting out the current economic times of course. If you're happy where you are, then find some good technologies and improvements to occupy your time and continue to deal with the external pressures as best as you can. I would suggest explaining or finding a way to let the other users understand how difficult and important what you're doing is. If that takes pushing deadlines then fine. Maybe posting a few articles around your office / on your door about how Google or BoA lost 10,000 customer's social security numbers, then do that. Be creative.

  36. Just a couple points by Profane+MuthaFucka · · Score: 2

    You have the authority to set policy. You do not typically have the authority to enforce policy, unless you also write the paychecks. That's your boss' job. Just generate the reports and pass them up.

    Also, don't worry about respect. Nobody respects people who are looking for respect. Also, you work for money, not respect. You can't take a bag of respect to the grocery store and trade it for a pizza.

    And respect won't impress a stripper either. If she thought respect was a good idea, she'd be violating someone's IT policies at an office job instead of wearing clear heeled shoes and licking her own nipples.

    --
    Fascism trolls keeping me up every night. When I starts a preachin', he HITS ME WITH HIS REICH!
  37. Re:Move to a different company by mverwijs · · Score: 3, Funny

    The guy who disliked me the most (actually accused me of sabotaging his win 95 box from the network, to our boss, just 18 months ago)

    You were babysit^Wadministrating a Windows 95 machine in 2007?! Yikes!

  38. I've done this for many years by taustin · · Score: 2, Informative

    There are some simple rules:

    1. Don't be an asshole.

    2. Learn to communicate effectively with people who do not know as much about the subject as you do.

    3. Don't be an asshole.

    4. When you explain something, and the other person clearly does not understand, do not simply repeat the explanation again word for word, only louder.

    5. Don't be an asshole.

    6. Document everything. Openly label that manilla folder "CYA."

    7. Don't be an asshole.

    8. Don't make promises you can't keep. Don't try to keep promises you didn't make (that's why you CYA).

    9. Don't be an asshole.

    10. Don't assume that decisions are made solely on a technical basis. Money does matter, and sometimes, good enough is good enough. "Because I want this kewl new toy" is a bad reason to spend ten times as much money.

    11. Don't be an asshole.

    And most important: Don't be an asshole.

  39. Stories from a non-recovering System Administrator by Zarquil · · Score: 2, Interesting

    I'm a sysadmin by day, computer consultant by night.

    I started this path because I kept getting stuck as "The Computer Guy." I set everyone up with email. I kept everything in the office running. I was the guy that knew what hardware to get next. I got a LAN up and running.

    I became a known quantity and all kinds of people started coming to me to fix the stupid problems. My friend talked me into starting a business on the side after fixing her computer. If nothing else I'd get a tax writeoff and at the very best my goal was to get into IT professionally and double my income.

    I burnt out. I got tired of doing the same stupid fixes for different (l)users. I got sick of working on someone's weird ass-hardware. I questioned why I ever wanted into the field in the first place. Then I got in with a company that wasn't stingy on getting standardized hardware and my job got easier (even possible). Things were great, I was excited and connected with my job, and then I ran into a lead programmer who dumped the impossible on my lap and expected immediate return. I burnt out again.

    Most of the company respected what I did, a few powerful people didn't. I got out, landed with a company I feel more comfortable with, and brought all my strengths with me without the baggage of a programmer dumping me in the middle of a problem and expecting me to fix it while he looked over my shoulder.

    My guru is a BoFH. I am not. It just doesn't work for me, I don't enjoy being grumpy all day (even though I secretly wish that I could be..) The people that respect what I do like me because I'm positive and helpful. When I'm not, I don't like myself. I'm most important, if I can't deal with the demands something outside me has to change, I can't live with the BoFH attitude.

    On the other hand, you're not a carpet to be walked on. If you have liberal policies that are getting dumped on, well, you have no policies at all. Defend and enforce your policies - you may need to explain your rationale. I'm really liberal on my network, I'm dealing with about 20 users, but my blanket policies are stupid easy to defend. (ie "Surf porn at home - our schtick is we're fast and our customers need ever bit of bandwidth we can give them." If they don't buy that, there's a dozen more excuses in my bag. If I can't get through after that, I have to decide if it's a hill I want to die on.)

    I completely agree with those who say, "Look at your work / life balance." Balance is everything. You don't have to do all your planning by the Scotty principle, but do pad your estimates and give yourself reasonable deadlines plus a bit. If you finish early, fill in that extra time you've given yourself with interesting projects. If you are enthusiastic and engaged in your work, your attitude spreads to your coworkers.

    Go get Thomas Limoncelli's "Time Management for System Administrators." http://www.amazon.com/Management-System-Administrators-Thomas-Limoncelli/dp/0596007833/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1244613832&sr=8-1 I found it infinitely worthwhile and read it every few months when I start to feel overwhelmed again.

    A last side note, I don't have to do the consulting gig on the side any longer, but I choose to because I find it most rewarding now. I do a lot of simple stuff these days and it's pleasant to have people at the end of their rope so grateful to have a professional look at their system. Treating coworkers as regular customers has helped me not bog down in the abyss of cynicism.

    And congratulate yourself. The very notion that you asked the question is a pretty good indication that you will find your own solution.

  40. The IT Guy by DaMattster · · Score: 2, Interesting

    As the IT guy, you are a mayor and a chief of police in one. You have to strike a political balance and this is easier said than done. You should definitely not be a jerk but nor should you roll over and capitulate into unreasonable demands. You might have to develop some strong policies, implement them, and adhere to them. If you can explain the logic behind the policies, most people will understand and back down and you are being a good mayor. It is the 1% asshole population that you need to take on a police chief role. It is never fun but must be done to insure the integrity and functionality of the network, its servers, and its workstations. I have found also that software engineers have little understanding of the technology side and vice versa. Opening up lines of good communication and dialogue can help build this understanding to allow both to work together more smoothly.

  41. Wrong company to work for by LostMyBeaver · · Score: 5, Interesting

    I am a software engineer working at a firm that has 50% engineering and 50% sales and administration. We use an outside firm for IT support since :
      1) We can change our own printer toner
      2) If something is broken on our PCs, we either don't trust anyone else to fix it for us or simply need a new PC at which point we reinstall it anyway.
      3) There's no such thing as an IT guy that would even understand where to begin to install and configure our tools (which actually suck since we have to enter in hardware addresses just to get them to start)
      4) We don't use much more than an e-mail server, a file server, and a Cisco. None of which requires a system administrator on site.
      5) Subversion and Wiki servers are run on a separate machine that the developers take control of.

    I would seriously pity any fool that would even consider being the first IT guy to start working at this company if it ever grew large enough that it should need one on site. Being the IT guy at a small engineering firm where the people on site have historically simply fixed their own stuff would be a disaster. I've seen it before as well. You just don't ever want to be that guy. The problem is, most software engineers learned a lot of what they know by grinding through these problems on test networks, home networks, school networks, etc... It is very rare they ever had to do a good job and make something that could stay live 24/7. So they don't know what it takes to make a system stable for 60 users that can be depended on, instead, they know that it's just a line in a script, what's so hard about that.

    If you want a position where a system adminstrator receives more respect, then go to a non-tech company. For example, the happiest system admins I've heard of work at places like paper mills. Remember that you're working at a company where you're more of a convenience than a necessity. If you got hit by a bus, the software engineers would hate doing it, but they'd just start doing the work themselves instead. In a way, at the company you're working at, you're nothing more than a single person that asks the boss for money for new stuff instead of having 40 engineers dropping receipts on his desk. So, in a way, where you are working, you're simply a secretary.

    If you want recognition for your talents, go to a company where instead of being "The guy who could have been a programmer/engineer but wasn't smart enough" and head to a company where you're "The guy who keeps the company running".

    1. Re:Wrong company to work for by edstrasser · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Arrogant comments like "We can change our own printer toner" and "The guy who could have been a programmer/engineer but wasn't smart enough" are why being an IT admin sucks -> everyone *ASSUMES* that this is all there is to being a sysadmin. And this is certainly the attitude of those the poster is complaining about.

  42. Put everything in writing by yog · · Score: 5, Insightful

    People on the job seem to get irrationally angry when it comes to computers and networks. Some of it is justified when they are being blocked from getting their own work done, and they will absolutely take it out on you when they don't have a good explanation for why things don't work. Those stupid IT guys messed it up again. It's the department everyone loves to hate.

    The professional approach is to leave your ego at the door when you clock in, and be sure to log all questions and complaints and your responses. If something escalates into a problem where your job is threatened, you can show the paper trail to your management.

    If someone is constantly berating you about computer problems that really are PEBCAK, just log each and every complaint plus your response. It can become quite an amusing read after a while, and you can share it with your management. It makes the other guy look bad. Of course, your goal shouldn't be to screw the other guy, but if they are being kind of childish and vindictive, it's very useful for deflection and self-defense should you be called on the carpet later on.

    Also, good communication is the key to defusing people's annoyance. When people are sitting around waiting for the network to come back up, or the departmental printer keeps not working right, or the web is really slow--if there's an explanation forthcoming quickly, people can understand that you're working like mad to fix it. When an IT department has a stand-offish attitude and refuses to answer phone calls and emails in a timely way, people will assume the worst.

    --
    it's = "it is"; its = possessive. E.g., it's flapping its wings.
    1. Re:Put everything in writing by alecwood · · Score: 3, Insightful

      User behaviour can be part of the problem. We've all come across users with 40 apps open whining their pc is slow. It's just not practical to give every user the latest greatest PC on the market with a super fast processor and oodles of memory - economics dictates that in business good enough is good enough.

      In the world of the one man IT dept, managing expectations is perhaps the greatest skill of all.

      --
      Real happiness lies in the completion of work using your own brains and skills.
    2. Re:Put everything in writing by Col.+Panic · · Score: 3, Funny

      assuming you mean to store this electronically. because i just don't have that many notepads

    3. Re:Put everything in writing by moranar · · Score: 2, Informative

      "When people are sitting around waiting for the network to come back up, or the departmental printer keeps not working right, or the web is really slow--if there's an explanation forthcoming quickly, people can understand that you're working like mad to fix it. When an IT department has a stand-offish attitude and refuses to answer phone calls and emails in a timely way, people will assume the worst."

      The problem is when the network is down and they want you to answer their emails.

      The rebuttal to your point is "I can try to solve this, or I can talk to you about it. Pick one". Not saying that it's the right answer all the time, I guess the correct reply is in the middle.

      --
      "I think it would be a good idea!"
      Gandhi, about Internet Security
    4. Re:Put everything in writing by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Informative

      Hear here. It's also good to remember that it's not every company that hates the IT dept.

      Where it is, often the problem can be with the management of the company. For example, failure to take IT's warnings into consideration, particularly with security but also with infrastructure procurements in an effort to drive down cost. It's understandable given the economic climate and could be IT's failure to express the seriousness of a situation to management. However, often people ignore warnings until it's too late.

      Inadequate resource and poor upper (and middle) management of IT even from outside the dept. (especially in small-mid sized businesses) can often lead to everyone unfairly blaming IT.

      How to deal with that situation? Convince management. Ask for a raise. Start writing your CV. Plod along against a management that deliberately ignores or takes shortcuts and just cash the paycheck. No answers from me here, the education (of management) route is best but often it falls on deaf ears.

    5. Re:Put everything in writing by corsec67 · · Score: 2, Funny

      If your XP box has been on for 4 months without rebooting (and somehow not crashing) I imagine a reboot would solve some of these problems.

      NO.

      If I reboot, and let the system run for a further 4 months, would the symptoms come back?

      Then the problem didn't get fixed.

      A reboot can definitely alleviate symptoms of a problem, but if it actually solves a problem, then there are more issues at play.

      Fixing a problem means that it wouldn't happen in the same way again. In your example, fixing the problem means that the issues wouldn't show up after 4 months of uptime.

      Definitely environmental issues could be a problem that manifests symptoms that can be alleviated with a reboot. I would look at noisy/crappy power before heat, though. If the computer is on a power conditioner/UPS, that generally eliminates issues related to power.

      --
      If I have nothing to hide, don't search me
    6. Re:Put everything in writing by hesiod · · Score: 3, Insightful

      It's also good to remember that it's not every company that hates the IT dept.

      Absolutely! Sometimes they are downright scared of us.

    7. Re:Put everything in writing by evilkasper · · Score: 2, Informative

      Unless you are talking about fixing memory leak errors in Windows then I don't really see how you can fix the need to reboot that OS on occasion. Sure you could put Linux on it, but then your user would be confused and annoy you even more.

  43. Re:Huh? by PitaBred · · Score: 3, Interesting

    Not just that. One of my professors was very well regarded in the algorithms field (can't remember exactly what for) and I remember he asked me to look at his Windows 2000 email machine once. Luckily he did all his important work on Unix, because that Win2K machine was probably the most spy and shitware infested POS I have ever seen. He was wondering why it was going "a little slow". It was at a constant 70%+ CPU usage from the amount of crap running. *shudder*

    Someone who is a very good algorithm developer, or even a very good programmer doesn't necessarily have to have the sense to know how to properly admin and maintain a machine.

  44. Create awareness about their requests by Noctris · · Score: 2, Interesting

    I've been in a situation like that and mostly, users don't understand that: " i would like a system that stores all customer data and automatically adds their incoming e-mails" results in months of work. They don't see the big picture and we humans don't see other issues when we are asking something ( what do you mean, you have other tasks ?)

    When i was servicing a 3 site company with around 50 people, i would get that type of questions all the time. After a while and A LOT of frustration, i started making "contracts" with people. Simple helpdesk tasks were fixed asap (kept them on the phone WHILE fixing so they get a feel for how long this actually takes).. larger "projects" or requests, were thrown into a simple schedule with the biggest steps in the process written down. Then i would add estimated dates when finished. Sure it creates a little overhead on the admin level, but after a short while, it got them relaxer, me relaxer and off my back.

    Since I had an "agreement" with them on paper stating what would be done when, they could not come and bug me anymore cause i would simply refer to the paper.. you do offcourse, have to keep to your word too..

    As for the being rude: We had sales guys who had to go sell products in bars.. not the kindest of folks AND not most computer literate around ( So where the f*ck is that "add printer".. i need to find it so i can pickup my copies .. *sigh* ).. I would be yelled at by them over the phone when they had an issue.. and i would just tell them they could call me back when they were cooled down and hung up. Simple as that. And when person to person, tell em, and walk away. Did that to the general manager once and after the initial "more yelling", he came to his senses, apologized and gave me a raise 2 weeks later.

    Nobody needs to put up with that sort of shit.. From anyone.. but most of the time, people need a little eyeopener before they understand they are being complete a-holes..

  45. What do you want? by Intrinsic · · Score: 3, Informative

    After 15 years of working in this field I can offer you some advise but you are not going to want to hear it.
    1. Do some work on yourself, read books on how to communicate with difficult people.

    2. If you dont like how you are treated in any situation you have two options: remove yourself from siuation. Or accept the situation gracefully and do you best to improve it.

    IMHO experience after trial and error, I have learned to trust my instincts. After years of working on my personality my goal is to be my genuine best with quality service and professionalism, by setting and example of being humble and compassionate to every one I meet, and I mean everyone regardless of what I think about the person.. Then after looking at the situation and finding no fault in my treatment toward others, I have to realize that I cant change people. I can only change myself and if my qualities are not enough to reverse someones bad treatment against me, I remove myself from the situation and find another company that values what I do for them and treats me with respect. I dont have time for people that are not able to appreciate my qualities. Let the deal with people that are just as miserable as them, They can be good company for each other.

    The next job you interview for, start doing some interviewing of them in return. Talk with them about your qualities, and talk about your history with the people you worked with in the past and explain how you want work with those kinds of people in the future. If your interviewers become defensive, or try to dismiss your claims, that is the first warning sign. I usually give it three warning signs before I walk out and thank them for their time. The second warning sign is an interview that is too much like an interview and offers no friendliness or balanced approach to genuine conversation along with the interview process. If its all business and no talk about personal interests or desires, its not going to be a friendly place to work.

    The third warning sign is when you ask or are given and opportunity to walk around and meet some of the people that work there. Ask them what its like working there, If you get allot of pauses in their communication or sideways looks that is the third warning sign.

    Meet your interviews more than once and make sure they make you feel comfortable in the work place before you make any decisions. No job is worth not feeling respected, you can always find another one.

    In my own professional life I have decide that I dislike most large businesses mostly because of petty politics and peoples obsession with status which means absolutely nothing to me. so I work for myself, I started my own small business providing excellent computer, web-site and video/audio services to people who give a shit.

  46. Re:Maybe you don't deserve any? by dbIII · · Score: 3, Informative

    Ah yes, the old developer vs admin thing where the admins get pissed off with the developers learning things (like DHCP the stupid bastard) by playing with production networks. Many well administered places have a completely seperate subnet just for the developers so they can break as much as they like without disturbing production (except for the idiot that just learned about routing who will get on every network he can). There can also be a lot of "I broke this dev box and have no backups but I'm not going to tell you how I broke it because you should be smart enough to figure that out". It takes a lot of work to support developers because they will know more about the subsystem they are working on but will rarely have the patience (or time) to explain to details of what was happening when they broke the system - about all you can do is have good practices in place (and enforced) to allow going back to a working state.

    The biggest difference is the admin will take the time to have some way to roll back a change and should also take the time to understand what is going on which can mean hitting the docs or trying it on a test system, and if necessary they will wait for a window when the system is idle. Developers in that situation will often just play instead and rarely think of the consequences to every other user. A good admin will also play about with stuff they don't understand, but on a spare machine that is just there to be trashed and off the network if there is a chance of things going wrong there.

  47. Re:Move to a different company by JumpDrive · · Score: 2

    Until last year we had a Windows 3.1 system being used in production. If you start out with 40 or more, one of them is bound to last an amazingly long time. Well actually if you move parts around you can create one that will last a long time.

  48. Re:I Set Expectations by selven · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Your name fits you.

  49. I once felt your discomfort. by joedoc · · Score: 5, Informative
    I was the IT department head at a small Navy command from 1998 through 2006 (my position was eliminated via cutbacks...now I'm a contractor). I had small staffs of one or two guys over that time, but spent a few years slugging it out alone. I had many of the same issues you do, perhaps not with the intensity you've experienced. Navy enlisted folks, for the most part, tended to treat me respectfully, and the officer corps and senior staff nearly always knew better than to get on my bad side.

    Every person who came to this command had to sit through a face-to-face IT brief with me. I gently explained what they could and couldn't do, how to report problems, etc. They signed off on the brief so I know they got it and I had a record of it.

    Occasionally, I had some assholes who insisted on being...well, assholes...and breaking the rules. My policy was to sit down with them privately and explain that they did sign a document saying they understood the rules. I would also gently confront them with the problem they were causing, and I would ask them not to do it again. Then, I'd follow up. Still a problem? Disable their account, send a report up the chain. The fireworks would usually start (especially among the officers) when I shut them down...they'd run to the executive officer and piss like kittens about their access, at which point the XO would show them my message. Then he'd call me in, and we'd have it out in front behind closed doors. I always won. One or two incidents like this usually stopped them completely.

    I had a set of policies that were outside the "official" IT instructions, but they were mine nonetheless:
    1. We have a trouble ticket reporting system on the command web site. That's where all problems get reported. It's a simple form, fill out details, I'll contact you. How quickly depends on emergency level. This didn't apply to my boss (the XO) or the unit Commanding Officer. But they rarely had problems.
    2. I don't deal with problems that you tell me when I'm walking down the hall or working on something else. I'll listen, but you need to post a trouble ticket. That's the only way I can track and prioritize issues. If you tell me and don't report it properly, don't complain when it doesn't get fixed.
    3. Make sure they understand that the computers and the network don't belong to them. I used to tell my folks that all the IT stuff belonged to me, because someone in the Navy chain put me in charge of it. If they want to do stuff you don't want them doing, explain that they can do that stuff at home. Not on your network. Then cut them off if they insist.
    4. Use all the security and administrative tools you have at your disposal. I hate working with Windows, but my experience with their servers and domains was that you have a slew of security tools built in that can cut out pretty much all behavior you don't like. Document all your policies (especially for you own sanity - you need a way to remember how to undo stuff!), and make sure they understand them clearly.

    I've always found that violators of my rules tend to get upset when they can't get to their stuff or find their passwords being reset every six hours. Sometimes you have to get their attention.

    By the way, make sure you get away from the desk for a while during the day, even if it's just to go outside for a short walk or stretch. Just getting some non-office air in your lungs and stretching the back, legs and arms will make you feel a lot better.

    I don't do sysadmin stuff now. I'm a web apps developer, a contractor, I get paid very well (a high security clearance helps), and my job has little of the stress and responsibilities I had before. This is much better.

    --
    Joe Dougherty, Florida, USA
    The words I thought I brought, I left behind. So, never mind.
  50. Re:Be firm..and good by elevtro · · Score: 5, Insightful

    I've been at it for my present company for over 4 years now. It is hard not to be a BOFH. Be good at what you do. If you are good people will respect you, unless they are an utter ass, there is no helping those people. Yes I will get stern with some of the hard headed ones. But usually after I've shown them a few times, exactly what THEY DID to cause the problem, they can fix it themselves. If after those few times you are still coming and asking for help then I might let that rudeness come out. I've only been a BOFH once, and I felt so much regret afterward that I apologized to the user and told them I was wrong for what I said. I didn't want to turn in the PHB, who are the real assholes around here.

    Learn your users personalities. Learn their level of user. Then use that information when assisting them. It makes it person and real for them and they will respect you more. No matter how many times you've heard the question or been presented with the problem, the user hasn't. It's like the person at walmart being asked where the trash bags are 100 times a day. He knows, and has said it a 100 times, but when you're the 99th person asking, he might be tired of hearing that same question over and over and gets rude. But if you understand that this person hasn't been told 98 times before, those were 98 other people, and this person really doesn't know, you can keep it real every time someone asks a question that you've answered before. Patience and lots of it go a long way.

    Meditate. It keeps you relaxed when even the nastiest of shit hits the fan. If you are at peace with yourself, you are at peace with all.

    Lastly, work for a company with HIGH turnover so that you never have to deal with someone for more than a year. That way every user is a new user.

    Just kidding about that last one.

  51. Train your users properly. by Scraps232 · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Two words: Managing Expectations. If you do every task as fast as you can for everyone who requests it, you will train your users to expect instant gratification from you and will demand it each time. You have to train your users what to expect from you and how fast to expect it. This is done by simply by managing how fast you do things for them. Your goal will be to manage all tasks before you with time and thought put into managing what is priority and what can wait until tomorrow. The article makes it sound like you are fairly new to the job market in general and so also are probably working longer hours for less pay than a standard person in the industry. One IT person for 60 users sounds pretty dubious. Regardless of how well you manage your time I suspect you could use a helping hand. Make sure you manage your life and health first, (sleep 7 hours a day and don't skip lunch like a maniac) then prioritize tasks in a way that when someone asks you to do something, you can give them a reasonable timeframe for completion, even if it is not the same day or week. I've found people are much more comfortable waiting for their project to be complete if they can rely on the deadline being met. If you say it can be done by the end of the day, but then you don't get it done that day or the next day, you're training your users that you are unreliable and they will have to hounmd you to get their requests completed. Many an admin fall into this trap, which they set for themselves, which usually ends up eating into personal time (ie those weekday midnight sessions alone in the office). Remember you're the one in the control of the solutions you are providing, so you're ultimately responsible for getting them done correctly and done in a reasonable timeframe. When managing your time properly, if you cannot get all of your work done in a reasonable timeframe, it is also your responsibility to escalate to your boss that changes need to be made to the system. Either hiring someone to help (bosses rarely like this one) or fewer users are allowed access to you (although if you're the only one available who can replace a broken keyboard or something else very minor, they don't really have a choice.) It's summertime, time to pick up some cheap/free summer interns. Bosses love the word 'free'.

  52. I had your job. by DaveV1.0 · · Score: 3, Insightful

    Well, maybe not your exact job, but close enough. The thing is, you seem to be confusing " friendly, helpful, and responsive" with being their bitch, and "being a bastard" with asserting yourself and your rights.

    Here is what I did:

    1. Determine who your boss is. I don't mean any dotted-line bosses, or your "customers". I mean the person that can fire you. If that person is not with in two levels of the CEO, you should start looking for a new job because the IT department is an after-thought.
    2. Get a complete job description and an org chart.
    3. Think about how your job has been for the last 1.5 years. Try to determine why you are not treated with respect. Is it a result of you not standing up for yourself or is it because your boss would over-ride you when you stood up for yourself?
    4. Come up with a plan of action to correct the situation.
    5. Go to your boss, explain the current conditions, and present your plan of action. If your boss is not part of the problem, he will support your plan. If your boss is part of the problem, keep looking for a new job.
    6. Implement the plan or leave for a new job. If you leave explain to everyone above you why you are leaving.

    As for the plan of action, consider the following:

    1. You boss needs to stand behind you 100%.
    2. Learn to use the word "no". If someone comes to you and wants something unreasonable, use the word. If they get upset, send them to your boss, who should ask them "What did the IT guy say?" and then he should repeat your answer to them. See #1.
    3. If they are rude to you, call them on it. Tell them you there to help them, but you do not have to put up with abuse. If they persist, take their computer back to the shop and tell them you will bring it back when it is fixed. If they complain, See #1.
    4. Enforce your "pretty liberal policies", to the letter. If you have input or control the policies, make them less liberal and put some teeth into the penalties. Then, apply those penalties. Oh, and it might not hurt to make an example, possibly public example, of someone who constantly violates the policies. See #1.
    5. If someone comes to you with a complex project, give them a reasonable time frame for completion. If they demand it be done sooner claiming it is an emergency or that they need it done, remember that a lack of planning on their part does not constitute an emergency on yours. Explain to them that you have other projects, some more important than theirs, that are ahead of their project and their project will take time as it is complex. If they don't like it, see #1.

    As you can see, this requires that your boss stand behind you and back you 100%. If not, then you are better off finding a new job. But, even if your boss will over-ride you every single time, you are better off pushing problems up the chain of command. Eventually, they will stop coming to you and start going to your boss. Then, you can turn to your boss and say "Which of these four 'important projects that have to done before everything else', do you want me to do first?" You can force your boss to set priorities and then when people come asking about their oh so important projects, you can say "My boss said I am to work on these projects in this order. Your project is number y, I am on x." and if they don't like it point them back to the boss.

    If you haven't gathered yet, the objective is to either get the authority you need to assert yourself and your rights, or force everything to go through your boss and make him deal with them while you look for a new and better job.

    --
    There is no "-1 offended" or "-1 you don't agree with me" mod options for a reason.
  53. 3 Your Users by Roxton · · Score: 3, Insightful

    1) Love your users. Be happy to help them. If you're having a bad day, either fake pleasantness or apologize for seeming "a little off" and explain with open sincerity about your bad day. If you can't create an atmosphere of good faith and empathy, you don't belong in IT.
    2) Don't assume that because you can do something, it must be easy. Google searching, for example, is not easy. Don't assume that knowing how to do something really well means that that you can be effective at explaining it. If a user gets confused, blame yourself. "Sorry, I haven't found a good way to explain this." "Oh come on, you're not stupid; it's just not as intuitive as it should be. We're still in the dark ages of software."
    3) Recognize that people need validation. In general, people hate having to ask for help. Acknowledge their need as reasonable. Any kind of hesitancy to help will create a sense of invalidation, which can poison your reputation forever.
    4) Where reasonable, cultivate friendships with your users.
    5) If the user seems incapable, your response should be ..oO(That user needs training.) Not ..oO(That user is an idiot.)
    6) In policy disputes, be an advocate for the users. When you enforce policy, be clear that it is out of obligation.
    7) Acknowledge that your role is to give other people the tools and environment they need to do their work.

    Hope this helps.

  54. Psychotropic drugs by ebunga · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Psychotropic drugs are a start. Nine out of ten systems administrators are prescribed at least one psychotropic drug. The other 10% either quit, smoke tons of pot, use various other illicit drugs, or commit suicide. Sorry to break the news to you.

  55. There's a difference between "Bastard" and... by thesandtiger · · Score: 2, Informative

    ... not being a doormat.

    If people are rude to you, be assertive: "I appreciate that you have a frustrating technical problem, but being rude to me isn't going to help fix it. Let's try to be constructive here." And then work on the problem.

    If people are demanding complex tasks be completed immediately, be assertive: "I'm sure it is a priority, but what you're asking for is pretty complicated and it's going to take some time to get it done properly." If they don't understand that, you might try to explain it in terms of their job - "If a client asked you to put together a massive marketing campaign and have it completely ready to launch in 10 minutes, you'd tell them it's not possible, right? This is the same thing." Most people won't push it past that, and if they do, you can just be blunt: "It's not happening. It's not something that's open to discussion, it's just not possible."

    Also look to your own behavior and see if there's something there that's irritating people or making them think of you as an outsider - like, do you roll your eyes or something when a person complains that their computer won't work when it's unplugged? Do you condescend when offering explanations? Do you frequently tell people you'll have something done in an hour when it winds up taking 2? Do you leave people hanging when they ask for help? Do you interact at all with your coworkers outside of immediate task-at-hand stuff (smalltalk, having lunch, etc)? Are you a fat, smelly nerd (serious question) who comes off like a parody of an IT guy?

    --
    Since I can't tell them apart, I treat all ACs as the same person.
  56. Re:Be firm..and good by Capt.DrumkenBum · · Score: 2, Funny

    "I've been at it for my present company for over 4 years now. It is hard not to be a BOFH."
    Come over to the dark side... We have cookies.

    But seriously, Everything and I mean EVERYTHING is in writing. If you show your frustration they win. If they show frustration you win.
    And last but not least, if all else fails blame Microsoft.

    --
    If I were God, wouldn't I protect my churches from acts of me?
  57. I've had 2 similar positions. by VIPERsssss · · Score: 2, Informative

    Here are some of the things that I have found that keep me from getting burned out.

    1) Check the cable.

    2) Check the cable.

    3) Seriously, check the cable. You'll feel stupid if you've been working for an hour on a problem only to find a disconnected cable.

    4) Lock down your workstations. Hard. You won't win any friends right now, but when people stop having malware problems they'll eventually see the light. Tell them exactly why you are doing this; that you feel their pain; you think spamming should be a capitol offense.

    4) Remember that no one loves you until something's broken (we'll fix that later)

    5) Tell them there's nothing they can break that you can't fix, so don't be scared to try stuff.

    6) Resist the urge to show frustration in front of others regardless of how stupid they are. They are there to do their job, not to become a computer expert.

    7) When they want you show them something *always* make them drive. They are more likely to remember it that way.

    8) Get off the internet, walk around the office. Find the person in each department who is always swamped with work. They've usually been there the longest and are the "go to" person. I guarantee you can streamline several of this person's procedures and give them back hours of their day. This person will be your friend forever.

    9) This is one of the most important; always balance any reports you have written. If finance doesn't trust your numbers they're useless.

    It may take a while but eventually you'll be hearing things like, "I know you're such a guru that this won't be a problem. Can you help me with..."

    --
    We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion.
  58. Difficult Users by sackeri · · Score: 2, Interesting

    A couple of years ago this story came out in ComputerWorld

    Someone posted it in our Company IT Forum, and this is the response I gave which I think applies to this situation:

    These categories are pretty good. But every single user you will work with is unique in their behavior when dealing with computer related problems. Interestingly enough, depending on how you handle these situations, you can use some of these personality types to your advantage in working with the problem.

    For example:

    Know-It-Alls - These people are more difficult to accomodate, as they're always asking for unusual requests, but the advantage is that if you go out of your way to help them, they usually don't need much follow-up help at all.
    Know-Nothings - Ironically, I think this type of user is easy to work with. I find that people who have little or no experience with computers hardly ever call for support. As long as they can get what they need done, they tend to follow the same patterns (check email, enter work orders, etc.). Also I tend to find a lot less junk installed on their PCs.
    Mr. Entitlement - Luckily this type of person is pretty rare. I think this person is more appropriately called "Mr High Expectations". I have users that expect a lot of hand holding, and feel neglected when you give them detailed instuctions. But again, like Know-it-alls, if you can bite your tongue and go a step out of your way, often they will be more flexible about working with you, sometimes waiting longer for you to make time for them, etc.

    I could go on, but my point is that each user behaves differently, and it's not as important on how to categorize them as it is to understanding how to work as well as you can with them. I think the most important point of the article is that you have to maintain a working relationship with these people despite how you feel about them, or how difficult they make your job. Here's what works for me.

    Be honest. - You have to honest about what you can and can not do for someone. If you let them know the limitations of what you can do for them, they are much more likely to meet you halfway to finding solutions. Also, you have to be honest about when you make mistakes. Admitting when you are wrong is pretty difficult sometimes, but most people are much more understanding and easy to work with when you do, rather than hiding behind your pride

    Communicate - Let your users know what is going on. With so much to do as an admin/support technician, I think this is the hardest to do. But when a request goes too long before there are any answers, it causes the most stress that can easily turn to uncomfortable confrontations. Simply letting someone know that you are working on their problem relieves a lot of tension.

    Empathize - Showing the people that you care about their problem helps tremendously. If you can get yourself "on their side", and that you are working together to solve their problem, it will make things easier for both of you. Also it will help you figure out the best way to help them, no matter what category of user personality types they fall into.

    Respect - This is a double-edged sword. If you don't respect the user, and they don't respect you, the above three things are not going to be easy. But it is important that you stand up for yourself when someone is being disrespectful. In those cases, being honest, communicating, and empatthizing are even more important. If you don't handle those situations by being the better person, you'll make it impossible for anyone to support your side of the situation.

    When it comes down to it, most people just want to do their jobs, not spend all day on the phone with you. Complaining about the users that turn your day sour makes you feel better, but at the end of the day, you still have to work with th