Apple Patents a Paper Bag (theguardian.com)
mspohr writes: Continuing its leadership in innovation, Apple has patented a paper bag. We all remember the groundbreaking "rounded corners" innovation, now we have a paper bag! Just try to make your own paper bag and you'll be speaking with Apple lawyers. (Note: In fairness to Apple, this is a "special" paper bag which is stronger due to numerous improvements on your ordinary recycled paper bag -- just don't try to copy it.) The patent application summarizes the bag as follows: "A paper bag is disclosed. The paper bag may include a bag container formed of white solid bleached sulfate paper with at least 60% post-consumer content." Apple's patented paper bags are designed to be sturdy, while remaining "both pearly white and environmentally friendly." Let's just hope they don't remove the handles...
In fact, the paper bag was invented by a woman to serve baked goods in, at least the white one Apple describes. The brown paper bag was invented by another woman, too.
-- Tigger warning: This post may contain tiggers! --
What Courage!
When Apple starts selling these things for $100 a pop, Apple's going to rolling in the dough. They might even, one day, pay taxes on that money.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dSINO6MKtco
Sounds like a design patent, which as the name suggests is pretty much about the look and feel of a common item. I doubt the "8-stitch circular-knit pattern" or the 6.5mm handle gain any particular utility beyond anything else, but it's basically just a way of Apple saying if you make a bag that looks too much like theirs, they can successfully sue you. Similarly, having been granted a patent would be a good defense against anyone trying to sue them over their shopping bags.
Sounds like it should be sent to Unpatent.
https://unpatent.co/
http://www.bustle.com/articles/46830-remember-ipod-socks-your-favorite-ipod-accessories-from-the-early-2000s-that-will-make-you-wish
Design and method for finding one's way out of a paper bag.
Here's A. Elk discussing some of her previous research..
I'm currently first in line at the Apple store as I type this on my new iPhone 7. I just finished selling my million dollar home, so I should be able to afford this new iBag, and have the first one. Apple foreverz! I love ya Timmy C!
Apple applies for 2000 patents a year. Now a bag of paper, tomorrow the wheel.
Slashdot, fix the reply notifications... You won't get away with it...
Hard to imagine so many people with so little to do to make the world a better place, for just themselves or everyone, that they need to sit around in anticipation of the next post on Slashdot about anything Apple so they can spew worthless trype.
I carried my new Apple headphones home in one of these new Apple bags and they got stuck. So frustrating. I couldn't get my Beats out of a paper bag.
It must have been something you assimilated. . . .
Surely even a half-trained carrot would have recognised that a paper bag, any paper bag, is subject prior art and therefore should have rejected the patent.
For a moment I was worried that the bag would be Tiffany Blue or John Deere Green and Apple would be facing an infringement complaint of their own.
Lucky for them my dentist didn't patent my tooth color! I'm happy to share.
With a 5 digit Slashdot UID, you've surely wasted more time here than most of us have.
Don't hurt yourself clutching those pearls, old sport.
Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law
I've got the patent on the paper back filled with dog poop lit on fire and left on a doorstep.
I can live off the license payments from Halloween alone.
You are welcome on my lawn.
so... if this paper bag is pearly white and stronger than other stuff that does similar stuff.... does it stand a chance against my invention of the perpetual vomit-comet? its like the nasa vomit comet except its perpetual...and never ending... 30 seconds up/in... 30 seconds down/out its also solar powered + methane powered and allows for the use of a single empty paper bag 1 quart in volume for the participants of the experiment to share amongst themselves .... oh and there is an obligatory free buffet of onions, beans, and pink grapefruit and limes to prevent scurvy... and wagu beef onboard...
fresh wagu cows are suitably catapulted onboard every few hours by the french revolutionary army.. dont worry, cow slaughter takes place on a plane nose mounted turbine engine and funneled through a very small tube into an IV of caffein, beer, and intermittent THC spikes...
ill let you guess where the methane comes from.
Apple is going to eventually end up selling paper bags. And Microsoft is going to do the printing.
Just one handle. Less confusion.
Disposal of your crappy iphone7, or used kitty litter, or used tampons. It's all the same.
...And I'll say it again: Apple is literally trolling their customers. They just want to see what they can get people to pay for.
It's always such a disappointment when someone patents/markets something based on it's environmentally friendly qualities.
Read about this on HN a few days ago. They *applied* for a patent on a paper bag -- the title is very misleading / clickbait-y. The summary is also lacking. The patent is for a reinforcement so that higher post-consumer recycle material can be used. The reinforcement strengthens the bag made of material that is normally less structurally sound (high post-consumer content). I doubt it will make it. There have been all kinds of paper bag reinforcements developed in the past -- it is unlikely there is anything unique about this reinforcement. I am pretty sure that applying an existing technology to a new purpose is not patentable.
I guess this means they can innovTe their way out of a paper bag?
Apple enjoys making chinese child slaves build their products for free too much for that
Anything sounds absurd if worded the right way. Examples:
Alexander Bell patents talking to a wire.
Henry Ford builds a mechanical horse.
Wright Brothers claim wood and fabric allow a man to float through the air.
Americans fly Eagle to the moon.
Saying that Apple patented a paper bag is so missing the point that it's bound to be mocked. If one actually reads the linked article (I know, this is Slashdot) then it becomes clear how the title is almost certainly intended to be misleading.
Is it so hard to come up with something that wouldn't be so laughable? How about, "Apple Patents New Ideas on Humble Paper Bag"?
I am armed because I am free. I am free because I am armed.
1. Inventor makes some new and non-obvious improvement to prior art. "I did A with B using C by way of D"
2. In patent application, the patent editor tries to widen the claim to. "A with B using C", "A using C by way of D" or even all the way to the silly and obvious "A".
3. Patent examiner rejects most claims. Some widened claims, beyond what the inventor considered to be his invention, are accepted by the examiner because they really are novel and non-obvious. The patent is now more valuable too inventor (or, more often, his employer) because it covers more things.
This process of trying to extend the claims by making them more general is quite mechanical. Patent editors do it almost automatically and without really trying to think too hard if the result makes much sense.
Sometimes overworked examiners accept silly over-generalized claims on an application and it makes it into a granted patent. It is a serious problem with the system (or a win, if you are the submitting company). Such claims may be overturned later in court, but most patent lawsuits are settled out of court, never challenging such claims because of the costs and risks involved. This makes such over generalized patents a weapon for bullies.
Sometimes, if you are a high-profile company that is under the public eye, people will pick such unexamined claims in a patent application and make them into a silly headline "company X tries to patent obvious thing Y!!!".
Stop worrying about the risks of nuclear power and start worrying about the risks of not using nuclear power.
becausd i anticipate Adam Sandler will sue anyone planting flaming bags of poo, airlines will charge for airsickness relief, and mortuaries will not provide a free vase for resultint crematory briscuits.
Austin Powers: yay capitalism!
More specifically, they *applied* to patent a particular way of reinforcing a paper bag made of white recycled paper, and a particular type of self-retracting handle that falls down into the bag, made of twisted paper.
Bleached recycled paper tends to be weak, so that's why reinforcement would be good.
I don't know whether the patent will ever issue. If it does, it will probably be narrowed in scope first. The usual process is that the applicant writes the initial application to be as broad as they think they might get away with, then it's made more specific as needed to actually get approved.
A paper bag? What the fuck, not necessarily apple but the patent office for giving it. If you've invented a new type of strong paper, fair enough, patent that, but you can't (shouldn't) be able to patent a bag for fucks sake. Especially such a generic looking one.
Wanna buy a shirt?
https://www.redbubble.com/people/stealthfinger/shop?asc=u
- and soon they will have to recall them because they can explode in certain conditions, like when pressure builds up on the inside and suddenly applied externally.
A more correct headline would be "Apple patents design of paper bag". Sounds a lot more sensible, doesn't it? I'm sure they've patented plenty of boxes and plastic bags and computer casings and mobile phone casings and headphones and whatnot. Pretty much anything they designed can be patented and be protected with a design patent.
This what happens when 1) someone who knows nothing about patents creates submission and 2) editors who know nothing about patents approve it. Add to that 3) a crowd of commentators who know nothing about patents and well, welcome to Slashdot.
It's just yet another a design patent, nothing to see here, please move along. Just one of many designs Apple has patented, and not just Apple but many many companies do this as a matter of course.
... run systemd?
Let's get around these claims....
1. Make a bag with at least 59% post consumer content. Or to be extra picky less than 59%.
2. Don't allow the handle to droop. If you do the handle may only droop at most 89% of the top edge into the bag container.
3. Don't user corrugated cardboard for the collar.
And to think, people thought that Apple would be less innovative without Steve Jobs. I guess Tim showed them!
Anything sounds absurd if worded the right way.
Are you that tragic a fanboy, direct from the patent applicaiton, so Apple's words, not mine:
1. A retail paper bag, comprising: a bag container formed of white paper with at least 60% post-consumer content.
US Patent application 20160264304
Here's a picture
Tell me that's not Apple patenting a paper bag and how the evil "Hateurs" are twisting it out of proportion.
Also your knowledge of history sucks.
Henry Ford builds a mechanical horse.
Henry Ford did not patent the automobile. That would be George B Selden and he held it hostage until Ford challenged him in court. Selden was a lot like Apple, making patents and threatening others with them to extort licensing fees. Probably not the first patent troll, but one of the pioneers in the field. Same as Ford didn't invent the car, but was instrumental in making the car what it is today (Ford's major contributions were in the manufacturing process, the Model T was actually a terrible car but it was affordable and easily built which was a first for cars).
Basically, your entire post is so horribly, horribly wrong.
Calling someone a "hater" only means you can not rationally rebut their argument.
White paper bags made of recycled material tend to be fairly flimsy due to the amount of bleach used
This reminds me of the space pen myth (the "NASA spent millions developing a pen that would work in zero G while Russia used a pencil" one), except this time it's Apple spending millions developing a strong bleached paper bag while everyone else uses unbleached brown paper.
for a company to paint their logo on brick and then patent their own paper weight.
Did you know 80 to 90% of the moderators on slashdot wouldn't recognize a troll even if one dragged them under a bridge.
I want to start by saying that I’m never going to buy an iPhone 7. I understand that removing the audio jack saved some room inside the iPhone. But the water proofing argument is stupid, the “courage argument” is bullshit, and the primary benefit is to Apple’s bottom line to sell us more expensive adapters and annoying wireless earphones.
I’ll buy a MacBook Pro because of the extended warranty, the fact that a comparable PC laptop costs only a little less (and looks less cool), industry support for Linux on laptops sucks, and I hate Windows. I bought an iPhone 6+ because I’m too lazy to research to find out which Android phone is the best, I can be sure that the iPhone is at least “good,” and I have an investment already in iPhone apps. But I hope to God (and all the other deities) that Apple fans are smart enough to sit this one out. Apple needs to get smacked hard in the pocketbook for such a stupid decision.
That being said, this patent is not about paper bags. It’s about making a more sturdy glossy white paper (from which you can make a bag) out of recycled materials.
america fuck yeah!!
This has not yet been patented, It has only been published by the patent office which automatically happens 18 months after the earliest filing date.
The idouchebag.
The description in the patent application (specific folds, reinforcement, handle design, etc.) sounds exactly like the bag I got this week. The paper is so heavy it feels almost like starched linen. Probably more ecologically friendly than the old plastic drawstring bags they used to use.
This is not a simple bag. This is a special one due to the material from which it is, so patent procedure is correct. I don't see reason to concern.
Quotes:
"White paper bags made of recycled material tend to be fairly flimsy due to the amount of bleach used, so Apple has come up with a bundle of alterations that should help its bags remain both pearly white and environmentally friendly"
KC
Nobody gives a shit
It will be a nice add to our collection.
If Apple wanted to make the world a better place they'd share the design of this wonder material so the entire planet could benefit from fewer trees needed for paper.
Protip, kids:
You know all those paper bags you use? For carrying the lunch mom made you but you never eat because you don't leave the basement?
To carry your waifu pillows in?
Patented. Every last one of them.
> except, reinforcing a paper bag with paper around the handle attachment
The reinforcement isn't around the handle. The singificant patent claims are:
a) a particular type of reinforcement (extra paper cut to a certain shape in glued in a certain way)
AND
b) a particular type of twisted paper handle which slides down into the bag when not in use.
tim is the next apple Messiah
I am glad Apple invented the computer, the smart telephone, the digital music player, the tablet PC, the smart watch and now the paper bag.
Wait?!?!?! What?!?!?!?! They didn't invent any of those things- they just claim credit for it? I don't believe you! Now, excuse me whilst I go watch my streaming TV player that Apple also invented.
"That's the way to do it" - Punch
Sure, bags are nothing new, but this one is made of paper....
and it's made from the pulp from an apple tree!!!
patent their way out of a paper bag. Oh wait, that's patented too.
its for their apple stores. walk out with stylish bag, advertise apple. you know, most people dont even know what Apple is, so making sure they put the message out is vital. maybe they could use push ads to cell phones...
It's for when you throw up in their driverless iCar...
Whats in the bag?
Whats in the bag?
Whats in the bag?!!!
Whats... in... the.... bag?
WHATS
IN
THE
BAG
?
?
?