User: turkeydance

Exec Order #2231

On: White House Declines To Support Bill That Would Let Judges Order Tech Companies To Break Encryption (reuters.com)

or something like that. don't need those congress-critters anymore.

this tool doesn't

On: FBI Director Says Unlocking Method Won't Work On Newer iPhones (cnn.com)

the other one will.

it's NOT hard to know what they are looking for

On: Spies In The Skies: FBI Planes Are Circling US Cities (buzzfeed.com)

everything

step right up ladies and gentlemen

On: Christie's Set To Auction Space Rocks For Out Of This World Prices (networkworld.com)

and behold Valera the Meteorite who once killed a cow...step right up.

do we know the phone was hacked

On: FBI Telling Congress How It Hacked iPhone (theverge.com)

or are we just believing the FBI said it was?

Enhance

On: Samsung Receives Patent For Smart Contact Lenses (softpedia.com)

224 to 176

aw...too late for Spring Break

On: Facebook Rolls Out Major Live Video Update (usatoday.com)

oh, the humanity

now we have the band's name

On: Researchers Keep Pig Heart Beating In Baboon Belly For 2 Years (arstechnica.com)

it's better than: Flat Foot Floogie (with a Floy Floy)

paypal can go where it "identifies"

On: PayPal Pulls North Carolina Plan After Transgender Bathroom Law (reuters.com)

nothing wrong with that

strangers

On: Magic Kinder Android App Lets Strangers Send Images, Videos To Your Kids (softpedia.com)

have the best videos

hold me closer

On: US Army Hopes To Outfit Soldiers With Tiny Drones By 2018 (engadget.com)

tiny drone

women and children most effected

On: Risks To Human Health Will Accelerate As Climate Changes, White House Warns (washingtonpost.com)

standard stuff

setting the trap

On: The White House Finally Got Color Printers (gizmodo.com)

by uploading the bait

Do Be a Do Bee

On: Some Bees Are Addicted to Caffeine (albanydailystar.com)

Just say No

slashdot

On: The Spread of Ignorance (bbc.com)

see how easy?

pay me to Not Block ads

On: Mozilla Co-Founder's Ad-blocking Brave Browser Will Pay You Bitcoin To See Ads (pcworld.com)

i'll bite. still won't watch the ads, though.

this War on Trump

On: Anonymous's War on Trump Described as Successful and Disastrous (techinsider.io)

will work out similar to the War on Drugs/Poverty/etc. it won't.

Re:for the same reason a dog licks its -er- privat

On: Verizon Plans $20 Upgrade Fee Even If You Pay Full Price For a Phone (macrumors.com)

dumb phone for the win

RICH

On: Futuristic Suit Lets You Feel What It's Like To Be An Old Man

beyond the reach of law.

"Scratch" is not the term i would have used.

On: Man Builds 'Scarlett Johansson' Robot From Scratch (mirror.co.uk)

don't want any STD references, please.

awww, they picked the best ones

On: North Korea Officially Blocks Facebook, Twitter and YouTube (mashable.com)

to block. just like my wife's office job.

"i want to go to America..."

On: More People On Earth Now Obese Than Underweight, Says Study (statnews.com)

"where even the poor people are fat."

Have after. To what issue will this come?

On: Bitcoin Could Consume As Much Electricity As Denmark By 2020 (boingboing.net)

Bitcoin. Heaven will direct it.

violations followed by puny fines

On: FCC Proposes New Restrictions On How Broadband Providers Share Data

and No convictions. that's our system!

Los Angeles Assemblyman Mike Gatto

On: California Bill AB 2867 Proposed To Allow You To Cancel Comcast With 'Click Of The Mouse' (techcrunch.com)

wants a donation from Comcast, et.al.