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User: PolygamousRanchKid+

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  1. Re:Pirates suck on Today Is International Talk Like a Pirate Day! · · Score: 1

    Why exactly should I emulate them?

    So you can fit in better with the rest of your family?

    Thanks, try the veal, it's a joke, give that table a free drink, etc.

  2. Bad day for the monkey ... on Today Is International Talk Like a Pirate Day! · · Score: 1

    ... "Arrgh, mateys, thirdy days at sea, and nought a wench to be seen ... grease up the monkey ...

  3. LHC Power! on 7th-Grader Designs Three Dimensional Solar Cell · · Score: 1

    Maybe his device simply siphons off a bit of power from the LHC?

  4. Carly Fiorina on Bavarian Police Seeking Skype Trojan Informant · · Score: 1

    well, I guess we can't really blame everything on them.

    Nah, we have George Bush for THAT.

    Didn't you mean Carly Fiorina instead of George Bush ... but who the hell can tell the difference between them anyway.

  5. Re:Stasi 2.0 on Bavarian Police Seeking Skype Trojan Informant · · Score: 1

    Far more efficient than filing cabinets and typewriters.

    Which brings me to the punch line: a colleague of mine from former East Germany told me about programming his first C programs ... on a VAX ... more than 20 years ago ... before the wall went down. I thought that VAXen were still restricted by export stuff back then.

    Ironically, he said that he never had heard of IBM ... well, I guess we can't really blame everything on them.

  6. Stasi 2.0 on Bavarian Police Seeking Skype Trojan Informant · · Score: 3, Interesting

    For the first time in my life, I will attempt to post something informative on Slashdot.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stasi_2.0

    The, err, um, joke, is that the Stasi were the former East German secret police (1.0).

    The major failure of the Stasi (1.0), was that they were collecting too much data, that they could ever dream of analyzing.

    Has 2.0 deeper pockets?

  7. The ideal assests are starting to sound creepy on Data Centers Crucial To Lehman Sale · · Score: 1

    Cash

    Data Centers

    Canned Goods

    Do I hear the sound of four horseman in the distance?

  8. What about the *really* secret treaties? on Citizens Demand To See Secret ACTA Treaty · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Because the public knows about ACTA, means that they can try to do something about it.

    What about the secret treaties, of which we know nothing?

    They might be trying to ban civilian use of tinfoil, or something like that.

  9. Just ask it a simple question ... on Spolsky's Software Q-and-A Site · · Score: 1

    ... so instead of debating about it, why doesn't someone just post the question on the site:

    "Is this site good, or crap?"

  10. Only patents? No Aliens? Boring! on NASA Patents To Be Auctioned · · Score: 1

    Patents, schmatents.

    I want to bid for the Aliens that NASA secretly captured!

    Well, some Alien technology would be cool, too.

    Does the US Patent Office have jurisdiction over Alien Intellectual Property?

  11. This US political process is *SO* outdated ... on McCain Picks Gov. Palin As Running Mate · · Score: 1

    Better political methods have been established and proved by current sleazy TV producers.

    ... put Biden, McCain, Obama and Palin (alphabetical order) into a Big Brother/Survivor House for a couple of weeks and force them to chow down on creepy-crawlers and paint Easter Eggs, and other tasks that would probe the essence of their character. Each day, folks could phone in an mod each candidate up or down.

    At the end, number one is President, number two is Vice-President.

    So we could end up with: Palin-Obama, McCain-Biden, etc. ... truly interesting!

  12. Behind WHAT door?!? on Behind the Doors of the Free Software Foundation · · Score: 1

    It must be Slashdot's choice of background color.

    I wacky-parsed that title to read:

    "Behind the Green Door of the Free Software Foundation"

    Please announce torrent and seed.

  13. The "Dead Kennedys" have prior art on this ... on Wikileaks To Sell Hugo Chavez' Email · · Score: 3, Funny

    http://www.lyricstime.com/dead-kennedys-stealing-people-s-mail-lyrics.html

    "Dead Kennedys sue Wikileaks!"

    Now that is a headline!

  14. Wind at national party conventions ... on The Power Grid Can't Handle Wind Farms · · Score: 1

    This is really a shame. Just think of how much wind will be generated at the national party conventions in the next weeks. And none of that can be plowed back into the Grid.

  15. Encapsulate the pictures in some porn ... on Digital Storage To Survive a 25-Year Dirt Nap? · · Score: 2, Insightful

    ... and seed it out as a torrent. Forget about burying the stuff ... who will remember where it was buried? A good porn torrent (or even a bad one) is like something out of a De Beers commercial: those torrents *really* last forever.

    I'm not so sure if there will be folks around in 25 years who understand CD/DVD/USB technology ... but one thing I will guarantee, they will be wanking off on Internet porn.

  16. Just buy all your stuff from Apple . . . on What To Do With All of My Gadget Chargers? · · Score: 1

    . . . with the Extended-Dance-Mix Warranty. When your device's batteries are empty, you just take it in to your local Apple Store, and they will return it to you in a couple of days, fully recharged.

    Probably.

  17. Cows fart in your general direction . . . on Scientists Discover Cows Point North · · Score: 1

    . . . or so Monty Python tells us . . . so if the cows are looking up north . . . well, sorry . . .

  18. Re:Huh? on New Evidence Debunks "Stupid" Neanderthal · · Score: 1

    For chrissakes, just look at the Levant where modern humans and Neandertals shared the same territories for thousands of years, with little to tell them apart other than their skeletons.

    Were those skeletons found with their skeletal hands wrapped around each others' skeletal necks?

    That might explain the current state of tranquility that exists in the region:

    "God's Monkey House"

  19. Rich Mexican Detector on Wealthy Mexicans Getting Chipped in Case of Abduction · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Friends ... I sell you a rich Mexican detector ... itsa wery nize ... you pointa da ding to Mexican ... if rice in blood ... itsa rich Mexican ... you kidnap ...

  20. Well, if they would actually *DO* the job ... on My Job Went To India · · Score: 1

    I recently had a problem with dbx on a AIX system. Yes, from the "Theater of the Hard to Believe", but even the modest dbx didn't work. Our support folks opened up a ticket. Since I had, in a former life, done some kernel development for AIX, I wrote to the folks in Austin. The answer:

    "This is supported by IBM India now ... good luck with debugging with printf"

  21. Please do not give Daryl McBride any more ideas on Biologists Create Genetic Map of Europe · · Score: 1

    My wife is Finnish, and this pretty much confirms my suspicion that she and all other Finns are in fact from outer space.

    Or we will be reading about SCO vs. Outer Space on Groklaw. Seems that them there Finnish/Aliens stole SCO's IP.

  22. But what about . . . on Biologists Create Genetic Map of Europe · · Score: 1

    . . . a Swedish Moose? One bit my sister once . . . see the lovely lakes . . .

  23. The State of California Edition . . . on T-Mobile Will Be First To Use Android · · Score: 1

    . . . will only support COBOL apps . . .

  24. Then we'll use complex physics . . . on How NASA Will Bomb the Moon To Find Water · · Score: 1

    Simple physics tells us

    . . . and point the Large Hadron Collider at the Moon . . . that will get it to talk, and tell us where the water is . .

  25. Re:I'm safe! on Sharing 2,999 Songs, 199 Movies Is Safe In Germany · · Score: 2, Funny

    Soviet General: "My troops get 2000 calories of food every day!"

    American General: "My troops get 4000 calories of food every day!"

    Soviet General: "Nonsense! Nobody can eat that much of potatoes!"

    Soviet General: "My troops have 200GB of films!"

    American General: "My troops have 400GB of films!"

    Soviet General: "Nonsense! Nobody can wank that much!"