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User: qpawn

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Comments · 42

  1. Re:Layoff Anxiety? on Layoff Anxiety Is Top Risk To Space Shuttle · · Score: 2, Funny

    From Arrested Development:

    Narrator: "Before firing his employees, George Sr. would be sure to clear the office of its valuables. [...] The employees never saw it coming, although their first task was to unload their equipment from a truck."

  2. You'd better watch out on Google Testing an Airborne Camera Drone · · Score: 3, Funny

    It sees you when you're sleeping, it knows when you're awake, it knows if you've been bad or good, so be good for goodness sake.

  3. Hooligans on Artificial Life Forms Evolve Basic Memory, Strategy · · Score: 2, Funny

    The study also found that the artificial fans of the losing team started to riot on their own.

  4. Worst Part on Why NASA's New Video Game Misses the Point · · Score: 5, Funny

    The game doesn't let you skip through the budget hearings. And, when they're finally over, your mission gets cancelled.

  5. It Begins... on Astronauts To Repair Cooling System On ISS · · Score: 2, Funny

    From the article: "[...] the Russian module of the system could take control for a period of time until repairs could be made."

    Take control?... Open the pod bay doors!!!

  6. Re:glow, baby, glow! on Nuclear Power Could See a Revival · · Score: 1

    Mr. Burns: I can't believe we've overlooked this week's winner for so very, very long. We simply could not function without his tireless efforts. So, a round of applause for...this inanimate carbon rod!

  7. What's New? on "Serious Games" Industry Gains Traction · · Score: 5, Funny

    Games have always had serious real world applications. Pitfall! for the Atari 2600 was used by the Boy Scouts of America to demonstrate survival tactics in the wild. Throughout the United States, Super Mario Bros. is still considered essential training for elite plumbers. In recent years, Call of Duty has saved the military millions of dollars in automated weapons costs by relying solely on long range knife throws.

  8. Only a matter of time on Do Children's E-Books Ruin Reading? · · Score: 2, Funny

    Next thing you know, they'll start making movies out of these books. Gasp!

  9. I'm no space expert, but... on "Wet" Asteroids Could Supply Space Gas Stations · · Score: 0, Offtopic

    ... it seems like a more suitable source of gas would be Uranus.

  10. A little over the top... on The State of Robotic Surgery · · Score: 1

    These robot doctors are very professional, except for their entrance into the operating room:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JqlawTD_9B0

  11. Re:Awful idea on 3D Video Game Collaboration Used To Solve Crimes · · Score: 1

    No, by shooting someone in real life you get to be in a video game!

  12. Works Like A Charm on Bomb-Proof Wallpaper Developed · · Score: 1

    The wallpaper doesn't let my video projector display Battlefield Earth.

  13. Slashdot Alibi... on Robbery Suspect Cleared By Facebook Alibi · · Score: 4, Funny

    I could have been cleared, but I posted as an Anonymous Coward.

  14. I wonder... on Bing Gets Porn Domain To Filter Explicit Content · · Score: 0, Offtopic

    What are the odds the explicit site is mirrored on Steve Ballmer's personal computer?

  15. Too Real? on Defining an Interactive Physical MMO For the iPhone · · Score: 5, Funny

    They could incorporate the phone feature into the game and make it so you have to talk to other people and build relationships. As you advance further along in the game, you must choose a career path. You will randomly get calls from your boss asking you to come in early or on your day off. If you choose not to follow the path, you end up 30 years old living in your mom's basement and have to put up with her constant nagging about how you never help out around the house or pay for your share of the phone bill.
     
    That's crazy. I totally help out around the house. Who do you think set up the home network?

  16. DMV on Administration Wants To Scale Back Real ID Law · · Score: 1

    I just went into the DMV to renew my license and it was expensive and rigorous.

  17. Time is Money on ESRB Eyeballing Ratings For iPhone Games · · Score: 1

    Apple has been known to take a long time to review many apps. If they were to have games rated through the ESRB, how much longer the process would take? On the same note, how much longer would it take to resubmit your app for approval if there is a rating dispute?

  18. Stay Focused on Intel Eyes Smartphone Chip Market · · Score: 1

    I hope the Intel employees don't get too distracted by random visits from USB co-inventor Ajay Bhatt.

  19. Only 48 Joints? on Why Natal Is a Big Deal · · Score: 5, Funny

    They could release an adult version of Project Natal that tracks 49 joints. That would make for a VERY interactive experience.

  20. Oops! on Using Mobile Phones To Write Messages In Air · · Score: 3, Funny

    The best part is you can flip the device over when you make a mistake and pretend to pour Wite-Out®.

  21. Bonus Fact on Ballmer Threatens To Pull Out of the US · · Score: 4, Funny

    It's my assumption that while making the threat he was sweating profusely.

  22. Horrible Reception on How American Homeless Stay Wired · · Score: 5, Funny

    I get like zero bars in my dumpster.

  23. Reminds Me of a Joke on On the Expectation of Value From Inexpensive Games · · Score: 5, Funny

    A guy goes to a $5 lady of the night, and he gets crabs. So the next day he goes back to complain and the woman says, 'Hey, it was only $5, what did you expect... lobster?'

  24. Re:just the next logical step in evolution of cont on Sony Rumored To Be Debuting Wiimote-Like Controller At E3 · · Score: 5, Funny

    The next logical step would be a controller that you can actually wear on your hand like a large glove. It would be so bad!

  25. Re:!victory on Australian Government Backing Down On Censorship · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Agreed. There was no need for it in the first place. Sometimes politics is like when you dangle a person over a cliff, but then pull them back up and act like the hero.