User: Thud457

now they're chasing the crowd

On: GM Dumps $500 Million Into Lyft (nytimes.com)

GM wanted to be part of the changing business models in transportation."

How the mighty have fallen.
Back in the day GM wanted to be part of changing the business models in transportation.

Zuck's raping lady Liberty...

On: Zuckerberg To Build Personal AI For Help At Home and Work (facebook.com)

Granted, Ironman did kill Cap, so the metaphor still sort of fits.

dog pants are so hot right now

On: Dog With 3D-Printed Legs Gets an Upgrade (gizmag.com)

So how's he wear his pants now?

lovingly hand-crafted by Space-X's engineers...

On: SpaceX To Test Recovered First Stage, Then Put It On Display (floridatoday.com)

uh... doesn't this mean that they will now need to make a LOT fewer now?

So much for economies of scale... ;p

hear hear, harumph!

On: Oracle Asked To Help Low-Income Residents Evicted For Its New Cloud Campus (cio.com)

51207733 is right. In our great free country, everyone has the right to starve to death in the gutter.

The law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich as well as the poor to sleep under bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread.

-- some asshole Frenchie

brotha, can you spare any crystite?

On: Robot Mule Put Out To Pasture By Marine Corps (nbcnews.com)

damn thing kept getting spooked by lightning storms and running off with all my Smithore

disgusting waste of taxpayer's money!

On: NASA Uncertain How To Proceed In Developing Deep Space Module (examiner.com)

But... but.. but... NASA already gets like 25% of the Federal budget.
And now Congress wants to give them Billions more while there are starving brown transgender children that need to be bombed?
GET YOUR PRIORITIES STRAIGHT, AMERICA!

like "Oktoberfest" without the bier

On: Ashley Madison Says It Added 4 Million Members Since the Hack (cnn.com)

4,000,000 bots? Either that or that's a real sausage-fest.

viral marketing for Mothra & Mecha Squidrilla

On: Giant Squid Filmed At Japanese Marina (wsj.com)

What part of

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn

didn't you understand?!!

like a tungsten aerostat

On: US Navy's $700 Million Mine-drone Won't Hunt (cnn.com)

Remote minehunting system...

. race to the bottom.

I see what you did there...

Re:Stephen Wolfram's greatest talent

On: Stephen Wolfram's Free Book Teaches the Wolfram Language To Kids

PhD in particle physics at age 20

Then he got distracted by some little side project and ended up never making any contribution to the field of particle physics.
what a failure.

Re: Summon the warrantless bulk collection apologi

On: Ex-US State Dept. Worker Pleads Guilty To Extensive Sextortion Case (networkworld.com)

oh wow. LOL.

good parenteering

On: UK's National Crime Agency Publishes Crazy Cyber-Crime Warning Signs (oomlout.co.uk)

Sit your kids down and have a frank discussion about their porn usage.

You may discover you have common interests. ;p

whew! that was close!

On: How the Thirty Meter Telescope Ruling Will Impact Future Astronomy Projects (forbes.com)

Well I'm glad that's settled.

Let's go burn down the observatory, so this'll never happen again!

legislate Pi = 3 while you're at it.

On: Top Democratic Senator Will Seek Legislation To "Pierce" Through Encryption (dailydot.com)

Math is hard.

stupid adults

On: UK's National Crime Agency Publishes Crazy Cyber-Crime Warning Signs (oomlout.co.uk)

• Is your child spending all of their time online?
  PORN.
• Are they interested in coding? Do they have independent learning material on computing?
  NERD.
• Do they have irregular sleeping patterns?
  soooo much PORN.
• Do they get an income from their online activities, do you know why and how?
  PORN.
• Are they resistant when asked what they do online?
  PORN.
• Do they use the full data allowance on the home broadband?
  PORN.
• Have they become more socially isolated?
  PORN.

NEXT!

sick, mad world

On: Alleged Bitcoin Creator Raided By Australian Authorities (arstechnica.com)

Is it too late for him to get refugee tax status in Switzerland?

#1 THC producing yeast

On: What If Someone Uses This DIY CRISPR Kit To Make Mutant Bacteria? (vice.com)

Now see, I would've gone with "make bacon CRISPR".

Re:Kipnapped by Stalin

On: Theremin's Bug Let Soviets Spy On USA For More Than 7 Years (hackaday.com)

Hey, at least he wasn't forced to make monster movies about the evils of unchecked Capitalism.

problem, reaction, solution. done.

On: Senators: Has Uncle Sam Paid Off Ransomware Criminals? (securityledger.com)

see? Criminals use encryption.
Encryption must be outlawed.

Re: They didn't hear of the Fairchild XC-120 Packp

On: Airbus Patent Shows Modular, Removable Aircraft Cabins (gizmag.com)

who cares, why even bother to do a security check on the passenger module?
Just design it so there is no passage from the cockpit to the passenger area. Let's see somebody hijack that.

better damn well be open bar.

On: Airbus Patent Shows Modular, Removable Aircraft Cabins (gizmag.com)

So this is like containers for passengers? Can they go multi-modal?

They'lll probably hire the same guy that designed this as architect for the terminal.

Huckleberry Musk

On: The Race To Create a Hyperloop Heats Up (wsj.com)

boy, painting this fence is really fun.

if it's possible, somebody will

On: IRS: We Used Stingray Devices To Track 37 Phones (arstechnica.com)

Hey, they could just follow established procedure and have the UK and Australia spy on American citizens and then share the data with the US and vice-versa.
That way the US avoids spying on US citizens.

fallout - the gift that keeps giving

On: Arkansas Has a Growing Population of "Climate Change Refugees"

We A-bombed THE FUCK outta their islands, and kicked them off others.[*]

They better damn well love America!


[*] still better than they probably could've expected at the hands of the Japanese...