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User: Profane+MuthaFucka

Profane+MuthaFucka's activity in the archive.

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Comments · 3,995

  1. Re:Add an accelermeter to the stage seperation log on SpaceX's Fourth Launch Attempt RSN · · Score: 1

    Ullage is used for stage separation too. The Saturn V had big'uns. The motors didn't separate the stages, they provided a little acceleration to settle the fuel at the back (bottom) of the tank before the stage ignition.

    You see them on each stage here.
    http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/b2/Saturn_v_schematic.jpg

  2. Re:Errata on When Dinosaurs Battled Crurotarsans · · Score: 1

    I continued stroking as the pressure of the spunk began to swell. As I began to shoot I aimed my pecker right down into GuyverDH's empty eye socket and inserted the fat head of my penis right past his eyelids. I pumped back and forth a couple more times, but couldn't hold it any more. The release of semen was tremendous, and as I pulled my cock back out of his eye socket it emitted an audible *pop* and the skeet began to leak out of the corner of GuyverDH's eye.

    Sensing an opportunity, GuyverDH quickly turned his head a little bit, to keep the spunk in there. The effect was remarkable, really, with one good eye and one spunk eye looking right at me. Then, just as quickly, GuyverDH stuck his toungue out and flipped his head forward. The semen drained out of the socket, channeled by his enormous nose, running right onto his tongue and into his mouth. He flipped the goo around a few times with his tongue and then swallowed the whole white ball in one big gulp. "TADA!" he said, adding just as quickly, "What are we going to do next?"

  3. Everyone has a soul mate on Ultimate Road Rage · · Score: 1

    And mine died in that fire that day.

  4. Re:step to step guide how not to get caught on Palin Email Hacker Found · · Score: 1

    It's not paranoid. Without camera or eyewitness evidence that puts you on the connection at the time of the hack, the only other way to prove anything would be possession of the PC. So don't be seen by anybody, use an untraceable PC that you trash, and keep your mouth shut. At that point it would take a freaky accident to get caught.

    Oh yea, don't use the PC for anything else before the hack, and don't even turn it on until you are ready to do the hack.

    For my next post, I'll describe an easy process for getting on an airplane even if your name really is Osama Bin Ladin.

  5. Re:Would it really be that hard? on Naphthalene Found In Outer Space · · Score: 0, Troll

    You dumbass, stop with the science. We all know you want to say that Jesus did it.

  6. Re:Errata on When Dinosaurs Battled Crurotarsans · · Score: 1

    I continued to masturbate just above GuyverDH's chin. He was vainly sticking his tongue out, trying to lick the mixture of eye juice/precum that was dripping off my hand. I was keeping it just out of reach, but close enough for him to smell the sweat from my balls. As I continued to furiously stroke, I started to feel that familiar tingling in my prostate as the muscles began to tense...

  7. Re:Errata on When Dinosaurs Battled Crurotarsans · · Score: 1

    GuyverDH looked at me with his remaining eye, then the fork, then me, then the fork, back and forth. He said "that was pretty clever, smearing my eye juice on your cock." Just don't waste it. That was good advice, as I'd never jacked off with aqueous and vitreous humour before. It was slick and felt great as I moved my fist up and down my cock, just above GuyverDH's face...

  8. Re:Errata on When Dinosaurs Battled Crurotarsans · · Score: 1

    I came back with the fork in my hand. GuyverDH was laying there naked on the floor, his three limbs pinned down. His eyes were closed, and he looked really peaceful. I stood watching for a long long time. Finally, one eye opened and looked right at me. I drove the fork down right into it, extracted it, and rubbed the juice all over my cock and balls.

  9. Re:You're lucky on New DDR3 Memory Touted As Fastest In the World · · Score: 1

    I'll concur with that. I bought nice expensive RAM for the first time in my life for my latest motherboard. Twice. Both sets resulted in crashes and memtest failures.

    I went back to the store the third time and told me to give me some RAM that didn't have a name. They said "how about Crucial?" I said "Is Crucial the name of the memory?" They said yes, so I said no, how about another one. Finally they sold me some cheap cheap Wintec stuff with no heat spreaders and it's been rock solid for a year now.

  10. God saved his life? on The World's Luckiest Man · · Score: 1, Flamebait

    More like God killed off his whole squadron just to smell their corpses.

    It always cracks me up when the sole survivor of some disaster says that god must have a reason for saving his life. What if god had some good reason for killing all those other people? Ever think of that?

  11. Re:steps on Germany Fired Up Over Clean Coal · · Score: 1

    All that means is that a lot of people can be fooled. The philosopher Barnum noted this already. There could be other reasons, and there are, why the hair shirts actually give a rats ass about you and your planet, even though you obviously don't.

  12. Re:yeah right (wing) on Political Viewpoints Linked To Fear · · Score: 1

    You're not fooling us with the right wing obsession with guns and the military and crying about invading brown people. What are you Birchers so scared of? BOO!

  13. Re:10 GB user data? Not likely on To Purge Or Not To Purge Your Data · · Score: 1

    FTP? Is that a new mainframe thing? Will it work with Lotus Notes? I guess that gives too much away about where I work.

  14. Re:10 GB user data? Not likely on To Purge Or Not To Purge Your Data · · Score: 1

    That's nothing. I work for a computer consultantcy and I have half a terabyte of attachments and meeting invites alone.

  15. Re:Errata on When Dinosaurs Battled Crurotarsans · · Score: 1

    My stomach was really growling now, preparing the arm, which was now cooking in the oven, was a lot of work. It was starting to smell good now too. Like chicken. I noticed that there were bits of corn in the turd which lay over GuyverDH's eyes. That'll do for now. So I go to the kitchen to get a fork...

  16. Re:Errata on When Dinosaurs Battled Crurotarsans · · Score: 1

    A familiar pressure filled my colon, so I reflexively pulled down my pants and squatted over GuyverDH's face. I laid a steamer right across both eyes. He was muttering something incoherent, which wasn't surprising. He never was that intelligent and mumbled all the time. My bowels relieved, I contemplated how to fill the 1:29 until GuyverDH's arm was ready. I tore a few pages out of my bible and wiped my dirty asshole with them...

  17. Re:Safety ? on Breakthrough In Use of Graphene For Ultracapacitors · · Score: 1

    Make the flywheel out of scotch tape. Without the adhesive. Just wind it tight and spin it. Experiments have been done to show that when it breaks the energy is dissipated safely, but you have to clean up a giant wad of cellphane tape.

  18. Re:Errata on When Dinosaurs Battled Crurotarsans · · Score: 1

    As I walked in the house with the hole saw, someone knocked at the door. I peeked out the window and saw it was the cops. I keep a rifle by the door, and it was an easy thing to fire a shot through the door at the two cops who were conveniently standing one in front of the other. It saves ammunition if someone can catch a shot that goes all the way through the first one. Nobody would find the bodies for days, because my good friend GuyverDH lived over 16,000 miles from the nearest neighbor. Such was the state of affairs on the more remote planets of the galaxy. Only 5 people lived on this planet. I had one nailed to the floor, two were on the doorstep, and that left just me and the neighbor on the other side of the planet.

    Nobody was going to interrupt my barbecue for a while. This was definitely going to be better than watching that gay movie "Fight Club" again. What kind of homo watches that kind of crap anyway.

    "GuyveryDH, looky what I have here!" I held up the bottle of barbecue sauce so he could see it. I went to fetch his arm, and a cookie sheet. Using the drill and hole saw, I put a few nice long tunnels under the skin. Tipping the barbecue sauce into it, I made sure that there was plenty of sauce on that arm, inside and out. I popped it into the oven at 375 degrees F for an hour and a half and sat down near GuyverDH.

    "Seems like we've got some time to kill," I said as I tickled his cock...

  19. Re:Errata on When Dinosaurs Battled Crurotarsans · · Score: 1

    And I went to the garage and got a drill and a hole saw...

  20. Re:Not Joel Spolsky's Site on Spolsky's Software Q-and-A Site · · Score: 1

    They used to show all the answers for free. All you had to do was scroll down past the section where the answers were blocked out, and all the answers would be repeated again, in the clear.

    But it looks like that's gone now.

  21. Re:Errata on When Dinosaurs Battled Crurotarsans · · Score: 1

    That flailing arm would be a problem, but I was out of nails. I had an axe though, so I took careful aim and swung. I've never cut off a man's arm before, and it was a little tougher than I thought it would be. It took two swings before it finally severed. I watched it for a second; I've seen the Evil Dead movies and I'm no fool. Satisfied with the deed, I kicked the arm aside. I might need that later. My pretty little man was now immobilized on the floor.

    I went to the kitchen and got a bottle of barbecue sauce...

  22. I'm anti-business on Tech Vs. Business? · · Score: 3, Funny

    Correction, I'm anti-YOUR-business. My company is GigantoMegaMonopoly Inc. and we're going to EAT you.

  23. Re:Errata on When Dinosaurs Battled Crurotarsans · · Score: 1

    I smiled down at my sexy man lying on the floor, in the last bit of his orgasm. I grinned, actually. He'd surprised me today, but I don't think he really knew what he awakened in me. "That was the LAST WORD in man fucking," GuyverDH managed to say between breaths. "Oh no it fucking wasn't," I replied. Then I aimed to show him what I meant by that.

    I reached over to the table and picked up the 3 pound sledge and one of those giant nails they sell at Home Depot. In one smooth motion I placed the nail and drove it with the sledge, right through GuyverDH's forearm. He yelled in pain, and his cock started to become erect again. The dildo, which he had shoved into his ass, shot out across the room as his anus muscles suddenly tensed up. A little puddle of shit fell out onto the floor too, and now was being smeared around by his flailing legs. How to fix that? BANG BANG I drove two more giant nails through his legs. GuyverDH's one remaining hand clutched at the floor, as he realized that his erection was completely justified. This was going to be more fun than anything he could have imagined...

  24. Re:Best Slashdot sig ever! on Slashdot's Disagree Mail · · Score: 1

    I did actually get some on the lens once. I like to put the cam right up to my dick so they can see what's happening. It's hard to judge the right distance when there's so much else going on. Focus, lighting, angle, aim, stroke, timing, pinching, spurting, distance. You can see how easy it is to get the cam a little too close.

  25. Re:Errata on When Dinosaurs Battled Crurotarsans · · Score: 1

    Ah yes, GuyverDH was a complete cock-mutilation freak. The dildo he was cramming into his asshole was moving back and forth furiously, harder and harder, faster and faster. A large mixture of santorum was accumulating all around the dildo and his asshole, caught in the long black curly hairs that grew out of his starfish in a nice neat ring. With his other hand he was stroking his cock, working up to a big explosion, while he started to call me names and pile abuse on me. I love that almost more than anything.

    GuyverDH started to shake uncontrollably, and he got onto his feet, still plunging the dildo in and out of his asshole. "I'm going to cum, Profane Muthafucka! I'm going to cum HARD. PUNCH ME PUNCH ME NOW" he yelled out in pleasure. I cocked my arm back and popped him in the ear. "No, you stupid Profane Muthafucka, PUNCH ME HARDER!" My second shot was much harder. I landed it right in his gut, and exactly as my fist connected the sperm started shooting out of GuyverDH's cock. It was almost like I popped a big sperm balloon inside with my punch. GuyverDH doubled over in pleasure and pain as his orgasm lasted forever it seemed. He was writhing around for maybe two minutes, I thought I might have really hurt him.

    GuyverDH eventually looked up at me with those beautiful eyes, hands still clenched on his cock, and gave me a look which meant that the night was still far from over...